August 27, 2025 • 48 mins
Why are so many couples divorcing after 50? This podcast explores the hidden connection between hormonal shifts, emotional fluctuations, and relationship challenges in midlife. Learn how estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone affect intimacy, stress, and connection—and what couples can do to thrive, not drift apart.
Ageless Blueprint is broadcast live at Wednesdays 9AM ET and Music on W4HC Radio – Health Café Live (www.w4hc.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).
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Ageless Blueprint is broadcast live at Wednesdays 9AM ET and Music on W4HC Radio – Health Café Live (www.w4hc.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com).
Ageless Blueprint TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com). Ageless Blueprint Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Media (www.talk4media.com), Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/ageless-blueprint--6586011/support.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Any health related information on the following show provides general
information only. Content presented on any show by any host
or guests should not be substituted for a doctor's advice.
Always consult your physician before beginning any new diet, exercise,
or treatment program.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
For centuries, ancient cultures need a secrets to longevity like
tarity and healing. Now modern science is catching up. Ageless
Blueprint is a podcast that will reveal the modern secrets
of better health and a better life. Join doctor Eldrick
Paylor here today and every Wednesday at nine am Eastern
(00:42):
Time on W FOURHC Radio at W FOURHC dot com
as together we discover the secrets to better health through
science and spirituality. A better life with Ageless Blueprint starts now.
Here's your host, Doctor Eldred Taylor's.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Hello. Hello, Hello, I am Doctor Taylor, the Harmone Doctor
and the Spiritual MD. Now I am coming to you
live from Ghana. It's a four hour time difference, so
it's actually one o'clock in the afternoon here. But I
am here to discover history, to understand where we all
(01:25):
came from, especially where I came from as an African American.
It is important to me that I try and understand
my culture and my heritage. Where did my ancestors come from?
You just need to understand that being an African American.
Where we're in America, everybody's proud of their heritage. I'm
(01:46):
an Italian, I'm Irish, I'm whatever. Well, we're African Americans,
and so at this point in my life, I'm interested
in where did I come from? What is going on
in my original homeland. So that's why we went to Egypt.
That's why we are back here in Ghana, and we'll
(02:09):
continue to travel like this and in other places because
I think it's very important to realize where you came from,
Where did your ancestors come from? That is and when
you look at what we're talking about with spirituality and
quantum physics, what you begin to understand is that your
history is connected to your present and your present life
(02:32):
and to your future life. So you need to understand
the whole spectrum of your life and your spirit and
your soul. Well did all of that come from? So
that's why we're here now. I thought I was dressing
some ghani and guard we've been eating ghani and food.
My wife is actually out shopping right now. There are
(02:55):
some beautiful fabrics here. They're very well made, very colorful.
My daughter actually called while we were at the shop
and then she started picking out things on FaceTime. So
I hope I'll have enough money to get back into
the US. So because they're going kind of crazy here,
but I'm happy that you joined us, and I want
(03:18):
to give you a little flavor of what Ghana is like.
I'm actually I'm doing some videos on TikTok. You can
follow me there at the Harmone Doctor on TikTok. I'm
going to put some information or some videos on Instagram
and then i'll have this podcast. I may try and
show you some videos that we took. We actually climbed
(03:42):
one of the mountains. It was beautiful scenery there. We
actually did it with ropes. It really wasn't a mountain,
it was a heel. I don't want you to think
I'm out here mount reclimbing, but it's a lot of
beautiful scenery here, lakes and waterfalls that we plan to
see as much as we can. So anyway, so today
I want to talk about kind of a serious subject
(04:04):
that I have been noticing, and it's called great divorce
and great divorce is these divorces that are happening in
people over fifty years old, and I'm just surprised. I'm
telling you. Two weeks ago, I was in the farmer's
market and it was a lady who I knew, but
(04:25):
she was like, how these things going? She said, Oh,
I just got divorced. And then I went to another
grocery store and I saw a friend that I went
to the wedding thirty years ago, and she told me
that she had just gotten divorced. And I have other
friends who and even patients who come in and they say,
you know, they're getting a divorce after twenty five thirty years,
(04:46):
And at first I didn't understand it, but now I'm
starting to understand it, and it just happens. It's a
part of the hormonal shifts and the life shifts that
happen as we grow older. Now, you know, even myself.
They say wisdom comes with experience, and I've experienced almost
(05:08):
all of these issues that I'm going to talk about today,
and I'll tell you it's a struggle to get through those.
It really is. Now I've been married for thirty nine years,
and I am so happy that we got through those struggles,
because I will tell you this last year has been
probably the most exciting year of our marriage, and I
(05:29):
believe it's because we have found a common interest. And
one of those interests is this ageless footprint, this trying
to understand history and what they left behind, and it
has given us a common interest other than raising our kids.
So I don't want to get too far ahead of myself.
I want to go through the slats so we can
(05:50):
really understand this, because this is really, it's really what
would be called an epidemic. So let's go to the slats.
Me make this a little bit bigger. So I guess,
all right, So why are the couple's over fifty divorce?
It's called greater vorce. Divorce after age fifty has risen sharply.
In the nineteen nineties, only about eight to nine percent
(06:13):
of the divorces were couples that were over fifty, but
by twenty nineteen that number hit thirty six percent, so
it's three times higher now. So that's been what in
the last twenty nine years. Over one third of all
divorces now involved older couples. While many factors can contribute,
(06:34):
a key overlook driver is harm moment shifts that both
men and women experience in midlife. These biological changes can
profoundly impact relationships, often unnoticed by couples. Now I will
tell you the reason why I'm talking about this, because
I can tell you there are several women especially who
have come to me and said, Wow, if I, if
(06:54):
I had understood this, if I had gotten my hormones
in check, I may not have gotten divorce. Now, I see,
it wasn't my husband. It was really these harmones that
were disrupting my life. And I was actually blaming my
husband and my kids and my parents because they were
the closest to me, so I thought that they were
(07:16):
making me feel like I was feeling. But it's not.
It's the harmonal shifts that are doing that. So the
hormonal shifts in women now perimenopause to menopause happens in
their forties and fifties. What happens there is that you
begin to not ovulate on a regular basis, or not
ovulate at all when you go through menopause. Ovulation means
(07:39):
making an egg. So what happens in the ovary is
that every month you make actually several cysts those cysts
make estrogen. They are trying to get the uterus ready
for ovulation. Now, what happens is is that as you
get in your forties and fifties, those eggs are forty
or fifty years old. You don't make new eggs. Men
(08:00):
make new sperm, but women don't make new eggs. So
here's what you have. You have several cysts that are
are producing estrogen, trying to make the tissue and the
uterus grow so it can be prepared for ovulation. But
those forty to fifty year old eggs don't ovulate as
efficiently as they did when you were twenty or thirty.
(08:22):
So you have a rise in estrogen, not a decrease
in estrogen. And that's what we don't understand. Most people
don't understand impairmentopause. Estrogen goes up because you have more
cysts that are trying to get trying to get to
the point where they ovulate, but a lot of times
they don't make it at all. So you have this
(08:42):
overwhelming amount of estrogen and you have a decreasing amount
of progesterone. What happens with that your peers become irregular
because ovulation is the timekeeper for your minstral cycle. Fourteen
days after ovulation, you should have a you should either
be pregnant or you should have mistrial cycle. When that
does not happen, that causes big problems. So you don't
(09:06):
know your users doesn't know when to bleed, how much
to bleed, so you miss periods, you have heavy periods. Also,
that esergen makes your fibroids growth, it makes your breast
tissue grow, and sometimes it stimulates abnormal breast tissue, so
it increases your risk of breast cancer during this time.
So then you also have these hot flashes and it's
not it's not caused by estrogen or progesterone. It's caused
(09:28):
by the imbalance of the estrogen and progesterone. So you
get hot flashes, night swicks, disrupted sleep, increased irritability, and
that's the problem that irritability and anxiety and boot swings,
and that causes disruption in relationships. Decreased patience and we
all know that marriage needs a marriage requires patience. It
(09:50):
also requires emotional resilience. Then women also have vaginal dryness
and reduce sexual desire, so sometimes it makes the man
feel rejected and not loved and these hormone changes can
make women feel not herself, impacting her partner's perception. And
so you have to understand that these hormone drops affect
(10:11):
patience in a dramatic fashion. Let's go to the next one. So,
and it's not all women. Okay, we don't need to
blame women and say, oh, it's their hormones. Well, it's
men too. You get at starting at age thirty five,
testosterone starts to decline, becoming more noticeable after fifty and
(10:31):
this gradual andropause often goes unrecognized. And we know that
the men, as they get older, they're more likely to
have erectile dysfunction. This causes anxiety and the man it
causes them to feel disconnected. And you just have to
understand how important sex is to men. It is it
(10:51):
is essential for men. Men have sex for recreation. Women
primarily have sex, and I'm just and this is a
generalization for procreation. Okay, So sex is more important to
men than it is to women. It helps to regulate
their stress and their mood. And then when they don't
(11:12):
have this testosterone causing that desire, it totally disrupts how
they feel about themselves and their confidence. And so let's
just go through this. When testosterone drops, energy decreases, you
get reduced motivation and increased irritability are common. So you
know you have she is irritable, the men is irritable.
(11:33):
She's impatient, he's impatient. So you just I mean, you
have a you have a recipe for disaster. Many withdraw
emotionally are become critical as testosterone falls. Declining testosterone can
cause less confidence, reduce libido, and decreased desire for emotional connection.
These changes are often blamed on stress or agent, and
(11:55):
men don't discuss these changes. Okay, suffering in silence are
the I ain't the impact pact. This creates hidden tension
as men struggle with unrecognized symptoms, and a lot of
times it makes men go out and find other things
that excite them. They're trying to recreate that excitement, that confidence.
(12:17):
So a lot of times they go and look for
all the women to make them feel confident because now
they can wine and dine this woman, and it makes
them feel better about themselves, and they don't understand that
they're destroying the relationship that most of their life has been.
Their foundation. Is this union between the husband and wife
(12:41):
that's created this family and now they go and destroy it.
And we just see this all the time where men
destroy relationships by looking for excitement in someone else. Let's
go to the next one, carmones and relationship stress. So
with both of these declining hard, the sexual connection begins
(13:02):
to fragment or just dissolved. So declining hardmonst directly impact libido, intimacy,
and couples often misrepresent this as rejection, not biology. And
the sexual part is really what brings people together. So
as that starts to fade away if you have not
(13:23):
built other emotional connections, other interests, and it's just it
is as biology. As you get older, sex thus become
less important and intimacy is more important. And I've had
to learn that in thirty nine years of marriage. You
know early on, and I'll just tell you men most
(13:44):
of the time get married because of sex. They see
this as, yes, I can have a sexual relationship with
this woman for the rest of my life. That's how
much I love her. I'm going to say all others.
And so if you don't build something else other than that,
the marriage can quickly. It doesn't even have to wait
till you're fifty. It can quickly start to dissolve. And
(14:08):
that is so important. You have to move from sex
to intimacy. Women understand that men not so much. We
have to be trained. We have to learn that intimacy
and sex are totally two different things. So emotional regulation.
Hardmon shifts affect emotional regulation, leading to more arguments, less patience,
(14:28):
and difficult conflict resolution. And again you have two people
who are irritable, two people who are less patient, and
that that can only blow up. That's just so combustible
that things are going to happen negatively. If you don't
understand these, if you don't investigate it, if you don't
try to correct it, then it's inevitable. And I think
(14:50):
that's what is going on in this rise in great divorce.
We just don't understand what's happening, and we blame it
on the other person. So the sleep disruption, hot flashes,
nights with and anxiety disrupt sleep. This increases irritability and
emotional distance. And women, if they do not feel good,
(15:11):
they do not want to have sex, if they're uncomfortable,
if they don't like the way they look because they've
gained weight, due to menopause. It doesn't matter how much
they love their husband, they are not going to want
to have sex. And that can cause a man to
feel rejected. And that is and that is key for
(15:32):
a man. They want to feel accepted. They want their
women to love them, they want their women to be
proud of them, and when they don't feel that, it
causes an emotional disconnection and a lot of times it
causes a breakup in the marriage. So we need to
be aware of these situations and what our biology is
(15:54):
doing to us. So why is great divorce on the rise?
There not only hormone shifts, but these hormone shifts seem
to coincide with transitions that stress even the strong relationships.
And again, I've been married thirty nine years, so I'm
not telling you something that I think. I'm telling you
(16:17):
something that I know. I'm telling you something that I've
been through that we've struggled through. It. It could we
have decided we want to get a divorce, yes, but
early on in our marriage, the first year and even
when we were going through counseling, we both agree that
divorce is off the table no matter what the divorce
(16:40):
that the option of divorce is off the table. Now.
Am I saying that no one should ever divorce. No,
if you are in an abusive relationship, if you are
in a violent really, yes, the voice can be something
that needs to be done. But I think everybody, if
you're really commit to a marriage, you have to take
(17:01):
divorce off the table. Because anyone who says they've been
married for more than five or six years and they
haven't thought about divorce, they're lying to you, okay, because
that thought will come. Just like I've always told you, Hey, thoughts,
they create feelings, and those feelings create your reality. So
(17:22):
even though you think it, you have to go back
and you have to say, no, I'm committed to this person.
We took divorce off the table, so we got to
struggle through it. And every time we struggled through it,
it has been it has made our marriage stronger. Okay,
So here's the first life challenge. When children come is
(17:43):
the first one because I tell men, when when the children.
When a child comes, when a woman has a child,
that child, the nourishment of that child, the development of
that child is that woman's number one priority. Okay, Sex
goes way down on the list once that child comes
and the needs of the child will always come before
(18:07):
your needs. You just need to accept it. Okay, that
is how life works. And men who think that after
the children come that they're going to have the same
sex life that they had before, you are fooling yourself.
And if that is what you are looking for, I'm sorry,
(18:27):
it's not going to happen. It's just not And I've
heard it from hundreds of men, thousands of men. That's
what happens. But you have to understand that if you
want your children to develop as best possible, you have
to maintain the core of that family, which is the
husband and wife. And we learned that when our children came.
(18:49):
We saw that we were drifting apart, and so we
started taking Friday night date nights. And I don't care
what was going on. Those children went to a place
where they could play on Friday nights and we could
go out to eat, we could do whatever we want.
And I'm going to tell you that saved our marriage
during that time is making sure that we put some
(19:13):
priority on our intimacy and our connectedness even though we
had children. It was the way we got through that,
all right. So we had that. Then we had this
common goal of raising our children, you know, and I'm
trying to make sure I can provide for them, that
I can make sure that I have money to educate them.
(19:35):
So we all had a common goal. I went out
and started speaking, and my wife stayed home. She stopped working,
so we all worked together so we could make sure
we raised our family. Then the children leave, then you
have to find something else that reunites the two of
you because now that common goal of raising the kids
(19:58):
is gone, and so then you have to look at
each other and say, do we still have a relationship
without the kids. And thankfully we developed it even while
the kids were small. We kept our relationship and we
prioritized it for one day every week. It was all
about the two of us. So then at the end,
(20:19):
when both of our children left, we still had the
core of our relationship. But then what we did We
found a common interest and we started ballroom dancing and
we still do it. We don't take as many lessons
as we used to, but we started ballroom dancing and
we did that for We did it intensely for ten years.
(20:41):
So that was the thing that we could do together.
It was something other than going out to eat and
watching movies. It was something active. It also keeps your
brain healthy and alive because you're actually learning something new,
you're moving your body so that you can stay coordinated.
So that was our interest. And now we're at this
in our life where we have a common interest in travel.
(21:03):
We went to Egypt. We're learning about things that we
never had time to learn and experience before. And what
you find out in life is that life is about experiences.
Is what can you experience together? What can you experience
in life? What wonders of this wonderful earth and universe?
(21:26):
What are the things that you can learn and discover?
So now that's our new focus. Okay, and again you
have to have something that brings you together. And through
this our intimacy has grown. And again I have learned
to separate sex from intimacy. It's just these shared experiences
(21:48):
are so valuable to me. They're so memorable. And when
you have an experience and you tied in with intense emotion,
it becomes an un forgettable it's life change. And so
that's what we are. That's what we are discovering, and
and also just starting this ageless blueprint is another thing
(22:09):
that we are working on together. She allows me time
to try and develop this. She encourages me. She knows
this as a passion of mine, and she is supporting
me through this. And even though sometimes I'm off by
myself working on this, she understands. She's not feeling like
I'm neglecting her. She knows that this is something that
(22:31):
I hope is going to benefit both of us in
the future and benefit our kids and their kids and
so on and so forth. So that's why I've gotten
so passionate about where, how did our ancestors develop me
to get to this point, and how can I continue
this for future generations? So anyway, So then you have
(22:53):
financial pressures because you know a lot of times at
this point in life, one of the spouses may become sick.
You're worried about medicare, and you're worried about retirement. Do
we have enough for retirement? Should we downsize? We've raised
our kids for thirty years in this home. Now we
need to downsize. We need to move and go somewhere else.
(23:15):
How are we going to adjust to that? So you
have all of these financial pressures and these relationship pressures,
and these are modal pressures. And they can all be
overwhelming and people look for relief, and sometimes that relief
means that I have to break up this relationship because
it's too much pressure. So harmone driven emotional distance can
(23:37):
magnify these life transitions, making them feel insurmountable. And so
that's what happens. There's so much pressure, so much stress,
and you're always trying to relieve stress. You're trying to
destress yourself. And so a lot of times people think
that the divorce is one way of doing it. Sometimes
that is true, but a lot of times it can
(24:00):
be saved if we could understand all of these different
pressures that come upon us as we get older. So
here are other contributing factors. Loss of intimacy. And again,
intimacy is different from sex. A woman naturally, you know,
as she goes through menopolitis, she starts to have vaginal
(24:22):
dryness and sex becomes not pleasurable anymore. Now there's ways,
you know, there's lubricants, there's an estriol cream that I
use to help women with vaginal dryness. But you just
have to understand these are normal changes. And this is
what I tell women. Your body naturally is going to
(24:43):
avoid pain and seek pleasure. And if sex becomes discomforting
or are painful, your body is automatically going to tell
you to not do it, no matter how much you
love your husband. And so that is a factor that
can be corrected, but you need to correct it before
it becomes ingrained in your subconscious that sex is painful.
(25:06):
Because now we got to reprogram your subconscious man to say, hey,
look there's ways we can avoid this pain and actually
this reconnection can be pleasurable. So that's one of the
things that is frustrating for couples. Men can't understand why
she doesn't want to have sex if she still loves me,
(25:28):
and women can't understand why their bodies won't respond even
though they still love their husband. Okay, it's because it's
a natural it's a natural instinct to avoid pain. Then
routine replaces passion. You know, do we have this routine
where we just go to work, we come home, we
watch TV, we eat, you know, we eat, and then
(25:49):
we watch TV, we go to bed, and we just
in such a routine, there's no passion, there's no excitement,
there's no interesting, unusual, exciting things that are happening. And
so it just becomes a routine. We talked about the
legal and financial changes. You know, now we are dealing
(26:09):
with retirement and social security, even going to be around.
I don't have enough in my four one K I
should have done this. Do we need to sell our
house so we can have enough money? So we have
all of these financial pressures coming upon you right at
this time where your productivity seems to be decreasing. Where
(26:33):
you may be in a job and they're aging you
out of it because you've been there for twenty thirty
years and getting rid of the people who are costing
them the most in payroll. Then you have AI who's
coming to take all of our jobs, so now people
are thinking about that. So it's just so many pressures.
And sometimes people see divorce as a relief file and
(26:55):
sometimes it can help, but a lot of times it's
not really the best thing. So hormonal changes can accelerate
intimacy loss, creating emotional distance over decades, and societal and
also his other thing to reduce social stigma. It used
to be a badge of shame if a woman was divorced.
It was like a scarlet letter. Now there's no real
(27:18):
stigma to divorce anymore. You know, divorce is becoming much
more common. When I say we've been married for thirty
nine years, people are shocked because most people don't stay
married that long because the stigma has been downgraded. And
it used to be people stayed together for the children,
or people stayed together because they didn't want that social
(27:40):
stigma of being divorced. Especially women didn't want that social
stigmas like it used to be. All my husband passed
me off. But after the break, we're going to talk that.
Now most of their voices are initiated by women. Is
not the men, it's the women. And that's what I
saw in my OBGYN practice, is that these women came
(28:02):
in saying that, hey, if I'd have known this about
my heartlones, I may not have gotten a divorce. And
now six well, I don't want to. I'll tell you
what the I'll tell you what the statistics are when
we come back from break, because it's time for break
right now. But yes, this is a woman motivated movement,
not men. Okay, it's not the man saying hey, I'm
(28:25):
I want a divorce. I'm going to marry a younger woman.
It's actually women who are saying I'm not going to
take this anymore, so we'll come back right after the break.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
All right, we are going to a click break, so
stay with us as we explore the ageless Blueprint right
here on W FOURHC Radio and Talk for TV, an
ancient secret with a modern twist for better health and vitality.
Doctor Taylor will be right back. Taking care of your
(28:55):
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Angel's blueprint once again. Let's join doctor Taylor for more
insights and research on the ancient secret to better health
(29:42):
and a better life in modern times. Here's your host,
doctor Aldred Taylor.
Speaker 3 (29:48):
All Right, we're back, and hey, Rebel, do we have
any questions? Do we need to just move on? Okay?
From Kevin, why did Hey, you got to ask God
about that? Okay, don't I don't know. Hey, that's how
you know. Hey, we are here to propagate the species.
So somebody has to make sure that the species continues,
(30:12):
and women seem to because women are the ones who
are the creators of this? Are they? They're the ones
who nurtured this baby from conception? Okay, so the nurturing
didn't start on you once the man saw that baby.
A woman starts nurturing that baby for the whole nine months.
And I understood that when I saw women who had miscarriages,
(30:36):
and the miscarriage may be only two, three, four weeks,
but they felt a significant loss. Even if that baby
never came to fruition where it was visible to other people,
her biology suffered a loss and it is traumatic. And
men need to understand that, and everybody needs to understand
(30:58):
that that that is a lot because that mother has
been nurturing that baby from conception, So it has a
tie with that baby that can be stronger than the
tie that they have with the man. That's why you
see these women, these single mothers. They survive, They can
have six children. The man leaves and they will stay there. Okay,
(31:23):
so you need to ask God about that. But I'm
telling your men you need to understand it because it's
not going to as far as I know, it's not
going to change. And to think about it, you don't
want it to change. If you have a child, you
want that mother to nurture that baby. Okay, I know
you want to have your needs met too, but you're
(31:45):
going to have to understand that you need to fall
in line. Okay, you just do. Are you going to
be frustrated? So anyway, I hope I explained that.
Speaker 4 (31:54):
Yes, you did, all right to say. The next question
is from Charlie. Do you find men get jealous of
not being first in a relationship after kids?
Speaker 3 (32:05):
Yes, that's the whole problem. That's what I'm trying to
help you to understand. You can be jealous all you want,
but it's not going to change how that woman is.
And this is what I've learned. The only thing you
can change is yourself. Okay. If you change yourself, then
the people around you will change. And if you become
(32:26):
more understanding of your wife or the mother of your child,
the woman will start to understand you more. Okay, So
you can't change women. You can't, all right. All you
can do is change how you respond to her. And
I will tell you that has been the most important
(32:47):
thing that has happened in my relationship with my wife
is that I learned I have to change how I
respond to her. And if I change how I respond
to her, she will change how she responds to me.
The more I understand her and I accept her as
the way she is, the more she will understand me
(33:10):
and accept me as the way I am. And that
is what I think true intimacy is is that we
understand each other and we accept each other, and we
accept each other through the changes that we go through.
We try to understand the changes, we try to support
each other through those changes. So that is that's how
(33:30):
you get over the jealousy. It's just change your mindset
and things around you will change. Let's do one more
question and then I'll finish up. I think I got
like two or three more slaves. Okay, So any other questions?
Speaker 4 (33:44):
Yes, okay. The last one is are you saying it
is okay to give each other space?
Speaker 2 (33:49):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (33:49):
Yes, hey, I will tell you that's another thing that
saved our marriage is that sometimes you have to go
to your separate corners and cool down and come back.
It's almost like you, I don't want to you know,
like a prize fight or whatever. You know, they say,
you know, you get all tangled up in in a fight,
and then they separate you out and they say, hey,
(34:10):
go to your corners, and then you come back. And
a lot of times when we see that a discussion,
I won't say an argument, that a discussion is starting
to move into an argument, we separate, We say, let's
let's just let's just think about this. And the key
is give your time, give yourself time to respond instead
(34:32):
of react, because a lot of times we just automatically
react to something our spouse does and we don't take
time to respond and think about it, because then what
happens is you get into this big argument, and what
happens after a while you start to think about it
and you're like, why did I do that? Why did
I do that? Why did I say that? I didn't
mean that? So just don't react, just stop, pull shut
(34:55):
your mouth, think about the situation and say how can
I resolve this where it doesn't lead into some long
extended argument that could lead into something that we don't
want so just take your time listen to your wife.
And that's what I had to listen. I had to
learn listen to her and then just shut up. Okay,
(35:15):
think about it and then come back. And sometimes you
don't even need an answer, just listen, and sometimes just
the woman being able to get it out and knowing
that you heard her, you don't even need to respond.
So that's something that is learned. And I'll tell you
if you if you follow that, just be quiet sometimes, okay,
(35:36):
just be quiet and take your time before you respond
to your spouse. And I guess that can go both
ways for the woman and the man. All right. Uh,
And I am so glad that the men are asking
the questions because the men sometimes don't look deep. We
are we are, you know, my wife says. You know,
men are simple. We're all a lot of times men
(35:57):
just look at the surface. And I want you, I
want to encourage you to go deeper into what a
relationship should be. You know, it's more than satisfying your
sexual desires. It's more than that. It can be more
beautiful than that, it really can. So all right, So
the role of women's independence. I told you these women
(36:19):
they're like I'm not going to take this anymore. These
hormonal shifts prompt identity reflection and they begin to say
what do I want in my life? Second half, they've
been you know, for decades, they've been doing household work responsibilities.
It causes humulative stress combined with harmonal fatigue. This can
(36:39):
become an emotional breaking point. And then also these women
as they get into their fifties, see, it used to
be they were bound by the home. The man went
out and worked, women stayed home and took care of
the kids in the house. So they didn't have the
financial autonomy to say, I'm not satisfied, I'm leaving. So
unlike past generations, women over fifty often have careers, and
(37:02):
very successful careers and financial independence, enabling them to leave
unsatisfying marriages. My wife is a physician. She could leave
whenever she wanted to. She doesn't necessarily need me. However,
emotionally we need each other, okay, and she needs me
I need her. We are we are two who have
(37:25):
become one, all right, But if you haven't done that.
The woman who does look deep, she looks deep into
a relationship. She's not functioning on the surface. So if
she feels unsatisfied deep in her soul, she will leave.
She will tell you she doesn't need you. She'll say
(37:46):
I can do bad by myself, all right. So this
is a new age for women, is that they are
not totally dependent upon a man for that financial security.
So men, you need to offer more than just financial
security if you want to maintain your marriage. It's not
about sex and finances. It's about having a deep relationship
(38:09):
with your spouse. So women initiate sixty six percent of
all divorces. Right, That's what I'm telling you. You know me,
and you think, oh yeah, I'll go find me another woman.
I know these women are saying I'm not going to
stay in an unsatisfying marriage, and I will tell you,
I'm going to be very honest with you. Is what
(38:29):
prompted this transformation in me is that my wife, I
was frustrated at where I was in life. I felt
like I could do more. I had this career where
you know, I was going out speaking and teaching and
communicating and trying to, you know, help people, and I
felt like I was stuck in my office. And then
I had some other things going on with my extended
(38:51):
family that I was frustrated. And my wife said, it's
difficult for me to be with you when you're like this,
and that struck a chord with me, and I said,
I have to change, and I've changed, and it has
been a wonderful change. And this is why I started
the Age Blueprint Blueprint, This is why I went to Egypt,
(39:11):
this is why here is because my wife said, you
are not living up to your potential. That's why you're frustrated.
And hey, if I hadn't listened, I'm she may have
been a part of that sixty six percent, Okay, And
that's why I'm saying, that thought comes into your mind
(39:32):
and you just have to you have to move beyond it.
And that's kind of what we did. So let me
go to this next one and why a baby boom
is affected now. When I used to go out and speak,
you know, ten to fifty years ago, I talked about
how baby boomers changed how we delivered babies where it
used to be, you know, in the old h I
love Lucy is that you know, the husband's in the
(39:55):
waiting room and the woman is off and she's having
a baby, and the man smoking a cigar, all that stuff.
Baby boomers said, we're not doing it like that. We're
not going to act like having a baby is an
illness where we go off to the hospital. So they
started to make these labor and delivery rooms look like
a rich Carlton. By the time I finished doing OB,
(40:15):
these rooms were spacious. All the family could be in
there and watch the delivery. They changed how we deliver babies.
They changed OB and then they've changed menopause. Is that
they're saying, I'm not taking this perman and bavarian. Some
of you are not old enough to know that's what
we used to do. If everybody the same thing, And
(40:36):
they're like, no, we're not going to do it that way.
And then so they're also changing the way divorces looked
at all. Right, They're saying, no, I'm not going to
be in this marriage. I don't need the financial security,
I don't need the disconnect, I don't need someone who
is emotionally distant from me. I'll leave. And so the
(40:58):
baby boomers have always changed society. And I'm at the
end of this baby boom general baby boomer generation, and
I have lived through the changes that the baby boomers
have created. So anyway, baby boomers consistently had higher divorce rates.
Great Voice continues this trend again, this women's independence and
(41:20):
women's movement. They feel like they don't have to have
a man. I believe that the man woman relationship is sacred,
but women are finding out that they don't have to
stay in an unsatisfying relationship. Life expectancy extends into the eighties.
Staying in unfulfilling marriages for decades is now unacceptable. Yeah,
(41:41):
you're fifty and you're like, hey, I got thirty more
good years. How do I want to spend those thirty
years again? That's why I started ages this bootprint. I'm like,
I'm sixty five, but I still have energy. I want
to do more. So I decided, Hey, I'm going to
start a podcast. I'm going to start this school community.
I'm going to do all this because I have a
(42:01):
lot more living to do. Harmonal health gap gap mid
life harmonal changes are rarely addressed as a relationship issue.
Many marriages drift apart. Be in biological support could help.
And that's why I'm doing this topic is I want
you to understand that those life changes are hard enough
and if you don't correct the biology changes, it's almost
(42:26):
it's almost inevitable that your marriage could end in a divorce.
Are you're going to just stay in an unsatisfying marriage
because you haven't fixed these biology issues? All right? So
I think this is, yeah, what makes great divorce different.
This is just like a summary. We have complex finances
like say downgrading, move into a different home, or move
(42:48):
into a different country because you can't afford to live
in America anymore. So you have these expaths that are
moving to Africa and move into Portugal and move into
all of these places. And that's very disrupting, and it
can be even though you're going there to relieve stress,
it can be stressful that transition. The emotional impact later life.
(43:09):
Divorce often triggers identity crisis, loneliness, and depression as partners
lose social networks and future plans. That's another issue with divorce,
and you've probably had this happen when you have a
couple that's friends of yours that divorce. Now, all of
a sudden, you have to pick sides. You've met these
people as couples, now they've divorced, and now it disrupts
(43:29):
your whole social network. So now the friends used to
hang out with, they're no more, They're not together anymore,
and usually it just dissolves that whole relationship. So we
talked about housing challenges and then unrecognized root calls hormone imbalances.
So you want to make sure that you are trying
to handle all of these issues. And the first thing
(43:51):
is just to be aware of these issues so that
you can you can tackle them together and work through
them together and not blame each other for your situation.
Here we go, great voice, key takeaways, emotional shifts. We've
really just talked about that. So we have about three
or four more managed. So what I really would like
for you to do is that in our school group,
(44:14):
I am going to create a relationship reset. Course, my
school group is going to go to a subscription service
and I'll be announcing more about that. But I started
this Age's Blueprint School about four or five months ago,
and all I had was a community where I would
(44:36):
give an agelest tip of the day and we would
have people go back and forth and we talk about it. Well,
over the last four months, I've created a lot of content.
You know, I've tried to relate thirty years of my
medical experience and my life experience, my relationship experience, and
(44:57):
how I've gone from being a conventional doctor to a
functional medicine doctor to now I'm becoming a healer and
all spects of all aspects of a person's life where
we're talking about my body, mind and spirit. So I've
done a lot of travel, I've taken a lot of courses.
I've hired mentors to help me to develop myself and
(45:20):
develop a program. So I've spent a lot of time
and a lot of money, and I want to be
able to share it with you, But I have to
place a value on that, and I appreciate everybody who
joined when all I had was a community. But now
we need to move into this next phase where I
can share more and I can help you to implement
(45:42):
some of these some of these changes. So that is
to come, I hope to. I hope to release that
on September the first are as close as I can
to that. Even while I'm here in God if I'm
not out experiencing this culture, I am actually here, and
(46:03):
you can get rid of the slades. I am actually
here in my hotel room developing content, is trying to
develop more information that I can share with you, because
I want my experiences to benefit more than just the
people who come into my office. I want it to
benefit the people who are listening on the podcast, who
(46:25):
follow me on different social medias, because now I understand
is that's how you get a message across. My patient
told me I had to get into social media if
I really wanted people to understand and if I wanted
to combat some of the misinformation that's out there, you
have to fight fire with fire. And so that's what
I'm doing. And I hope that this podcast is helping you.
(46:46):
And if you want to work with me closer, please
join my school group, follow me on my YouTube channel,
follow me on this podcast, Age's Blueprint podcast dot com.
So please connect with me. I want to connect with
you and rebel any more questions. I think we got
a minute or two or not even listen maybe lessen
(47:07):
at any more questions.
Speaker 4 (47:09):
No, doctor, you covered everything.
Speaker 3 (47:11):
Okay, all right, good? So I will see you next week.
I hope. I have to look at my flight information
on Wednesday. I may be traveling next Wednesday. If not,
I may mean if I am, I may pre record something.
It won't be live. But I'll let you know, but
until then, I'm saying goodbye from Akroagana.
Speaker 2 (47:34):
Thanks for joining Doctor Tamler today. If you missed any
part of this show, just check out the podcast wherever
you listen to podcasts. Angel's Blueprint is every Wednesday at
nine am Eastern Time on W FOURHC Radio at W
FOURC dot com. Together, we discovered the ancient secrets to
(47:56):
better health through science and spirituality need for modern times.
Until then, feel free to check out angel'speeprint podcast dot
com and tailor Mvformulations dot com for more information
Any health related information on the following show provides general
information only. Content presented on any show by any host
or guests should not be substituted for a doctor's advice.
Always consult your physician before beginning any new diet, exercise,
or treatment program.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
For centuries, ancient cultures need a secrets to longevity like
tarity and healing. Now modern science is catching up. Ageless
Blueprint is a podcast that will reveal the modern secrets
of better health and a better life. Join doctor Eldrick
Paylor here today and every Wednesday at nine am Eastern
(00:42):
Time on W FOURHC Radio at W FOURHC dot com
as together we discover the secrets to better health through
science and spirituality. A better life with Ageless Blueprint starts now.
Here's your host, Doctor Eldred Taylor's.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
Hello. Hello, Hello, I am Doctor Taylor, the Harmone Doctor
and the Spiritual MD. Now I am coming to you
live from Ghana. It's a four hour time difference, so
it's actually one o'clock in the afternoon here. But I
am here to discover history, to understand where we all
(01:25):
came from, especially where I came from as an African American.
It is important to me that I try and understand
my culture and my heritage. Where did my ancestors come from?
You just need to understand that being an African American.
Where we're in America, everybody's proud of their heritage. I'm
(01:46):
an Italian, I'm Irish, I'm whatever. Well, we're African Americans,
and so at this point in my life, I'm interested
in where did I come from? What is going on
in my original homeland. So that's why we went to Egypt.
That's why we are back here in Ghana, and we'll
(02:09):
continue to travel like this and in other places because
I think it's very important to realize where you came from,
Where did your ancestors come from? That is and when
you look at what we're talking about with spirituality and
quantum physics, what you begin to understand is that your
history is connected to your present and your present life
(02:32):
and to your future life. So you need to understand
the whole spectrum of your life and your spirit and
your soul. Well did all of that come from? So
that's why we're here now. I thought I was dressing
some ghani and guard we've been eating ghani and food.
My wife is actually out shopping right now. There are
(02:55):
some beautiful fabrics here. They're very well made, very colorful.
My daughter actually called while we were at the shop
and then she started picking out things on FaceTime. So
I hope I'll have enough money to get back into
the US. So because they're going kind of crazy here,
but I'm happy that you joined us, and I want
(03:18):
to give you a little flavor of what Ghana is like.
I'm actually I'm doing some videos on TikTok. You can
follow me there at the Harmone Doctor on TikTok. I'm
going to put some information or some videos on Instagram
and then i'll have this podcast. I may try and
show you some videos that we took. We actually climbed
(03:42):
one of the mountains. It was beautiful scenery there. We
actually did it with ropes. It really wasn't a mountain,
it was a heel. I don't want you to think
I'm out here mount reclimbing, but it's a lot of
beautiful scenery here, lakes and waterfalls that we plan to
see as much as we can. So anyway, so today
I want to talk about kind of a serious subject
(04:04):
that I have been noticing, and it's called great divorce
and great divorce is these divorces that are happening in
people over fifty years old, and I'm just surprised. I'm
telling you. Two weeks ago, I was in the farmer's
market and it was a lady who I knew, but
(04:25):
she was like, how these things going? She said, Oh,
I just got divorced. And then I went to another
grocery store and I saw a friend that I went
to the wedding thirty years ago, and she told me
that she had just gotten divorced. And I have other
friends who and even patients who come in and they say,
you know, they're getting a divorce after twenty five thirty years,
(04:46):
And at first I didn't understand it, but now I'm
starting to understand it, and it just happens. It's a
part of the hormonal shifts and the life shifts that
happen as we grow older. Now, you know, even myself.
They say wisdom comes with experience, and I've experienced almost
(05:08):
all of these issues that I'm going to talk about today,
and I'll tell you it's a struggle to get through those.
It really is. Now I've been married for thirty nine years,
and I am so happy that we got through those struggles,
because I will tell you this last year has been
probably the most exciting year of our marriage, and I
(05:29):
believe it's because we have found a common interest. And
one of those interests is this ageless footprint, this trying
to understand history and what they left behind, and it
has given us a common interest other than raising our kids.
So I don't want to get too far ahead of myself.
I want to go through the slats so we can
(05:50):
really understand this, because this is really, it's really what
would be called an epidemic. So let's go to the slats.
Me make this a little bit bigger. So I guess,
all right, So why are the couple's over fifty divorce?
It's called greater vorce. Divorce after age fifty has risen sharply.
In the nineteen nineties, only about eight to nine percent
(06:13):
of the divorces were couples that were over fifty, but
by twenty nineteen that number hit thirty six percent, so
it's three times higher now. So that's been what in
the last twenty nine years. Over one third of all
divorces now involved older couples. While many factors can contribute,
(06:34):
a key overlook driver is harm moment shifts that both
men and women experience in midlife. These biological changes can
profoundly impact relationships, often unnoticed by couples. Now I will
tell you the reason why I'm talking about this, because
I can tell you there are several women especially who
have come to me and said, Wow, if I, if
(06:54):
I had understood this, if I had gotten my hormones
in check, I may not have gotten divorce. Now, I see,
it wasn't my husband. It was really these harmones that
were disrupting my life. And I was actually blaming my
husband and my kids and my parents because they were
the closest to me, so I thought that they were
(07:16):
making me feel like I was feeling. But it's not.
It's the harmonal shifts that are doing that. So the
hormonal shifts in women now perimenopause to menopause happens in
their forties and fifties. What happens there is that you
begin to not ovulate on a regular basis, or not
ovulate at all when you go through menopause. Ovulation means
(07:39):
making an egg. So what happens in the ovary is
that every month you make actually several cysts those cysts
make estrogen. They are trying to get the uterus ready
for ovulation. Now, what happens is is that as you
get in your forties and fifties, those eggs are forty
or fifty years old. You don't make new eggs. Men
(08:00):
make new sperm, but women don't make new eggs. So
here's what you have. You have several cysts that are
are producing estrogen, trying to make the tissue and the
uterus grow so it can be prepared for ovulation. But
those forty to fifty year old eggs don't ovulate as
efficiently as they did when you were twenty or thirty.
(08:22):
So you have a rise in estrogen, not a decrease
in estrogen. And that's what we don't understand. Most people
don't understand impairmentopause. Estrogen goes up because you have more
cysts that are trying to get trying to get to
the point where they ovulate, but a lot of times
they don't make it at all. So you have this
(08:42):
overwhelming amount of estrogen and you have a decreasing amount
of progesterone. What happens with that your peers become irregular
because ovulation is the timekeeper for your minstral cycle. Fourteen
days after ovulation, you should have a you should either
be pregnant or you should have mistrial cycle. When that
does not happen, that causes big problems. So you don't
(09:06):
know your users doesn't know when to bleed, how much
to bleed, so you miss periods, you have heavy periods. Also,
that esergen makes your fibroids growth, it makes your breast
tissue grow, and sometimes it stimulates abnormal breast tissue, so
it increases your risk of breast cancer during this time.
So then you also have these hot flashes and it's
not it's not caused by estrogen or progesterone. It's caused
(09:28):
by the imbalance of the estrogen and progesterone. So you
get hot flashes, night swicks, disrupted sleep, increased irritability, and
that's the problem that irritability and anxiety and boot swings,
and that causes disruption in relationships. Decreased patience and we
all know that marriage needs a marriage requires patience. It
(09:50):
also requires emotional resilience. Then women also have vaginal dryness
and reduce sexual desire, so sometimes it makes the man
feel rejected and not loved and these hormone changes can
make women feel not herself, impacting her partner's perception. And
so you have to understand that these hormone drops affect
(10:11):
patience in a dramatic fashion. Let's go to the next one. So,
and it's not all women. Okay, we don't need to
blame women and say, oh, it's their hormones. Well, it's
men too. You get at starting at age thirty five,
testosterone starts to decline, becoming more noticeable after fifty and
(10:31):
this gradual andropause often goes unrecognized. And we know that
the men, as they get older, they're more likely to
have erectile dysfunction. This causes anxiety and the man it
causes them to feel disconnected. And you just have to
understand how important sex is to men. It is it
(10:51):
is essential for men. Men have sex for recreation. Women
primarily have sex, and I'm just and this is a
generalization for procreation. Okay, So sex is more important to
men than it is to women. It helps to regulate
their stress and their mood. And then when they don't
(11:12):
have this testosterone causing that desire, it totally disrupts how
they feel about themselves and their confidence. And so let's
just go through this. When testosterone drops, energy decreases, you
get reduced motivation and increased irritability are common. So you
know you have she is irritable, the men is irritable.
(11:33):
She's impatient, he's impatient. So you just I mean, you
have a you have a recipe for disaster. Many withdraw
emotionally are become critical as testosterone falls. Declining testosterone can
cause less confidence, reduce libido, and decreased desire for emotional connection.
These changes are often blamed on stress or agent, and
(11:55):
men don't discuss these changes. Okay, suffering in silence are
the I ain't the impact pact. This creates hidden tension
as men struggle with unrecognized symptoms, and a lot of
times it makes men go out and find other things
that excite them. They're trying to recreate that excitement, that confidence.
(12:17):
So a lot of times they go and look for
all the women to make them feel confident because now
they can wine and dine this woman, and it makes
them feel better about themselves, and they don't understand that
they're destroying the relationship that most of their life has been.
Their foundation. Is this union between the husband and wife
(12:41):
that's created this family and now they go and destroy it.
And we just see this all the time where men
destroy relationships by looking for excitement in someone else. Let's
go to the next one, carmones and relationship stress. So
with both of these declining hard, the sexual connection begins
(13:02):
to fragment or just dissolved. So declining hardmonst directly impact libido, intimacy,
and couples often misrepresent this as rejection, not biology. And
the sexual part is really what brings people together. So
as that starts to fade away if you have not
(13:23):
built other emotional connections, other interests, and it's just it
is as biology. As you get older, sex thus become
less important and intimacy is more important. And I've had
to learn that in thirty nine years of marriage. You
know early on, and I'll just tell you men most
(13:44):
of the time get married because of sex. They see
this as, yes, I can have a sexual relationship with
this woman for the rest of my life. That's how
much I love her. I'm going to say all others.
And so if you don't build something else other than that,
the marriage can quickly. It doesn't even have to wait
till you're fifty. It can quickly start to dissolve. And
(14:08):
that is so important. You have to move from sex
to intimacy. Women understand that men not so much. We
have to be trained. We have to learn that intimacy
and sex are totally two different things. So emotional regulation.
Hardmon shifts affect emotional regulation, leading to more arguments, less patience,
(14:28):
and difficult conflict resolution. And again you have two people
who are irritable, two people who are less patient, and
that that can only blow up. That's just so combustible
that things are going to happen negatively. If you don't
understand these, if you don't investigate it, if you don't
try to correct it, then it's inevitable. And I think
(14:50):
that's what is going on in this rise in great divorce.
We just don't understand what's happening, and we blame it
on the other person. So the sleep disruption, hot flashes,
nights with and anxiety disrupt sleep. This increases irritability and
emotional distance. And women, if they do not feel good,
(15:11):
they do not want to have sex, if they're uncomfortable,
if they don't like the way they look because they've
gained weight, due to menopause. It doesn't matter how much
they love their husband, they are not going to want
to have sex. And that can cause a man to
feel rejected. And that is and that is key for
(15:32):
a man. They want to feel accepted. They want their
women to love them, they want their women to be
proud of them, and when they don't feel that, it
causes an emotional disconnection and a lot of times it
causes a breakup in the marriage. So we need to
be aware of these situations and what our biology is
(15:54):
doing to us. So why is great divorce on the rise?
There not only hormone shifts, but these hormone shifts seem
to coincide with transitions that stress even the strong relationships.
And again, I've been married thirty nine years, so I'm
not telling you something that I think. I'm telling you
(16:17):
something that I know. I'm telling you something that I've
been through that we've struggled through. It. It could we
have decided we want to get a divorce, yes, but
early on in our marriage, the first year and even
when we were going through counseling, we both agree that
divorce is off the table no matter what the divorce
(16:40):
that the option of divorce is off the table. Now.
Am I saying that no one should ever divorce. No,
if you are in an abusive relationship, if you are
in a violent really, yes, the voice can be something
that needs to be done. But I think everybody, if
you're really commit to a marriage, you have to take
(17:01):
divorce off the table. Because anyone who says they've been
married for more than five or six years and they
haven't thought about divorce, they're lying to you, okay, because
that thought will come. Just like I've always told you, Hey, thoughts,
they create feelings, and those feelings create your reality. So
(17:22):
even though you think it, you have to go back
and you have to say, no, I'm committed to this person.
We took divorce off the table, so we got to
struggle through it. And every time we struggled through it,
it has been it has made our marriage stronger. Okay,
So here's the first life challenge. When children come is
(17:43):
the first one because I tell men, when when the children.
When a child comes, when a woman has a child,
that child, the nourishment of that child, the development of
that child is that woman's number one priority. Okay, Sex
goes way down on the list once that child comes
and the needs of the child will always come before
(18:07):
your needs. You just need to accept it. Okay, that
is how life works. And men who think that after
the children come that they're going to have the same
sex life that they had before, you are fooling yourself.
And if that is what you are looking for, I'm sorry,
(18:27):
it's not going to happen. It's just not And I've
heard it from hundreds of men, thousands of men. That's
what happens. But you have to understand that if you
want your children to develop as best possible, you have
to maintain the core of that family, which is the
husband and wife. And we learned that when our children came.
(18:49):
We saw that we were drifting apart, and so we
started taking Friday night date nights. And I don't care
what was going on. Those children went to a place
where they could play on Friday nights and we could
go out to eat, we could do whatever we want.
And I'm going to tell you that saved our marriage
during that time is making sure that we put some
(19:13):
priority on our intimacy and our connectedness even though we
had children. It was the way we got through that,
all right. So we had that. Then we had this
common goal of raising our children, you know, and I'm
trying to make sure I can provide for them, that
I can make sure that I have money to educate them.
(19:35):
So we all had a common goal. I went out
and started speaking, and my wife stayed home. She stopped working,
so we all worked together so we could make sure
we raised our family. Then the children leave, then you
have to find something else that reunites the two of
you because now that common goal of raising the kids
(19:58):
is gone, and so then you have to look at
each other and say, do we still have a relationship
without the kids. And thankfully we developed it even while
the kids were small. We kept our relationship and we
prioritized it for one day every week. It was all
about the two of us. So then at the end,
(20:19):
when both of our children left, we still had the
core of our relationship. But then what we did We
found a common interest and we started ballroom dancing and
we still do it. We don't take as many lessons
as we used to, but we started ballroom dancing and
we did that for We did it intensely for ten years.
(20:41):
So that was the thing that we could do together.
It was something other than going out to eat and
watching movies. It was something active. It also keeps your
brain healthy and alive because you're actually learning something new,
you're moving your body so that you can stay coordinated.
So that was our interest. And now we're at this
in our life where we have a common interest in travel.
(21:03):
We went to Egypt. We're learning about things that we
never had time to learn and experience before. And what
you find out in life is that life is about experiences.
Is what can you experience together? What can you experience
in life? What wonders of this wonderful earth and universe?
(21:26):
What are the things that you can learn and discover?
So now that's our new focus. Okay, and again you
have to have something that brings you together. And through
this our intimacy has grown. And again I have learned
to separate sex from intimacy. It's just these shared experiences
(21:48):
are so valuable to me. They're so memorable. And when
you have an experience and you tied in with intense emotion,
it becomes an un forgettable it's life change. And so
that's what we are. That's what we are discovering, and
and also just starting this ageless blueprint is another thing
(22:09):
that we are working on together. She allows me time
to try and develop this. She encourages me. She knows
this as a passion of mine, and she is supporting
me through this. And even though sometimes I'm off by
myself working on this, she understands. She's not feeling like
I'm neglecting her. She knows that this is something that
(22:31):
I hope is going to benefit both of us in
the future and benefit our kids and their kids and
so on and so forth. So that's why I've gotten
so passionate about where, how did our ancestors develop me
to get to this point, and how can I continue
this for future generations? So anyway, So then you have
(22:53):
financial pressures because you know a lot of times at
this point in life, one of the spouses may become sick.
You're worried about medicare, and you're worried about retirement. Do
we have enough for retirement? Should we downsize? We've raised
our kids for thirty years in this home. Now we
need to downsize. We need to move and go somewhere else.
(23:15):
How are we going to adjust to that? So you
have all of these financial pressures and these relationship pressures,
and these are modal pressures. And they can all be
overwhelming and people look for relief, and sometimes that relief
means that I have to break up this relationship because
it's too much pressure. So harmone driven emotional distance can
(23:37):
magnify these life transitions, making them feel insurmountable. And so
that's what happens. There's so much pressure, so much stress,
and you're always trying to relieve stress. You're trying to
destress yourself. And so a lot of times people think
that the divorce is one way of doing it. Sometimes
that is true, but a lot of times it can
(24:00):
be saved if we could understand all of these different
pressures that come upon us as we get older. So
here are other contributing factors. Loss of intimacy. And again,
intimacy is different from sex. A woman naturally, you know,
as she goes through menopolitis, she starts to have vaginal
(24:22):
dryness and sex becomes not pleasurable anymore. Now there's ways,
you know, there's lubricants, there's an estriol cream that I
use to help women with vaginal dryness. But you just
have to understand these are normal changes. And this is
what I tell women. Your body naturally is going to
(24:43):
avoid pain and seek pleasure. And if sex becomes discomforting
or are painful, your body is automatically going to tell
you to not do it, no matter how much you
love your husband. And so that is a factor that
can be corrected, but you need to correct it before
it becomes ingrained in your subconscious that sex is painful.
(25:06):
Because now we got to reprogram your subconscious man to say, hey,
look there's ways we can avoid this pain and actually
this reconnection can be pleasurable. So that's one of the
things that is frustrating for couples. Men can't understand why
she doesn't want to have sex if she still loves me,
(25:28):
and women can't understand why their bodies won't respond even
though they still love their husband. Okay, it's because it's
a natural it's a natural instinct to avoid pain. Then
routine replaces passion. You know, do we have this routine
where we just go to work, we come home, we
watch TV, we eat, you know, we eat, and then
(25:49):
we watch TV, we go to bed, and we just
in such a routine, there's no passion, there's no excitement,
there's no interesting, unusual, exciting things that are happening. And
so it just becomes a routine. We talked about the
legal and financial changes. You know, now we are dealing
(26:09):
with retirement and social security, even going to be around.
I don't have enough in my four one K I
should have done this. Do we need to sell our
house so we can have enough money? So we have
all of these financial pressures coming upon you right at
this time where your productivity seems to be decreasing. Where
(26:33):
you may be in a job and they're aging you
out of it because you've been there for twenty thirty
years and getting rid of the people who are costing
them the most in payroll. Then you have AI who's
coming to take all of our jobs, so now people
are thinking about that. So it's just so many pressures.
And sometimes people see divorce as a relief file and
(26:55):
sometimes it can help, but a lot of times it's
not really the best thing. So hormonal changes can accelerate
intimacy loss, creating emotional distance over decades, and societal and
also his other thing to reduce social stigma. It used
to be a badge of shame if a woman was divorced.
It was like a scarlet letter. Now there's no real
(27:18):
stigma to divorce anymore. You know, divorce is becoming much
more common. When I say we've been married for thirty
nine years, people are shocked because most people don't stay
married that long because the stigma has been downgraded. And
it used to be people stayed together for the children,
or people stayed together because they didn't want that social
(27:40):
stigma of being divorced. Especially women didn't want that social
stigmas like it used to be. All my husband passed
me off. But after the break, we're going to talk that.
Now most of their voices are initiated by women. Is
not the men, it's the women. And that's what I
saw in my OBGYN practice, is that these women came
(28:02):
in saying that, hey, if I'd have known this about
my heartlones, I may not have gotten a divorce. And
now six well, I don't want to. I'll tell you
what the I'll tell you what the statistics are when
we come back from break, because it's time for break
right now. But yes, this is a woman motivated movement,
not men. Okay, it's not the man saying hey, I'm
(28:25):
I want a divorce. I'm going to marry a younger woman.
It's actually women who are saying I'm not going to
take this anymore, so we'll come back right after the break.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
All right, we are going to a click break, so
stay with us as we explore the ageless Blueprint right
here on W FOURHC Radio and Talk for TV, an
ancient secret with a modern twist for better health and vitality.
Doctor Taylor will be right back. Taking care of your
(28:55):
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(29:20):
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MD Formulations dot com. We are back for more of
Angel's blueprint once again. Let's join doctor Taylor for more
insights and research on the ancient secret to better health
(29:42):
and a better life in modern times. Here's your host,
doctor Aldred Taylor.
Speaker 3 (29:48):
All Right, we're back, and hey, Rebel, do we have
any questions? Do we need to just move on? Okay?
From Kevin, why did Hey, you got to ask God
about that? Okay, don't I don't know. Hey, that's how
you know. Hey, we are here to propagate the species.
So somebody has to make sure that the species continues,
(30:12):
and women seem to because women are the ones who
are the creators of this? Are they? They're the ones
who nurtured this baby from conception? Okay, so the nurturing
didn't start on you once the man saw that baby.
A woman starts nurturing that baby for the whole nine months.
And I understood that when I saw women who had miscarriages,
(30:36):
and the miscarriage may be only two, three, four weeks,
but they felt a significant loss. Even if that baby
never came to fruition where it was visible to other people,
her biology suffered a loss and it is traumatic. And
men need to understand that, and everybody needs to understand
(30:58):
that that that is a lot because that mother has
been nurturing that baby from conception, So it has a
tie with that baby that can be stronger than the
tie that they have with the man. That's why you
see these women, these single mothers. They survive, They can
have six children. The man leaves and they will stay there. Okay,
(31:23):
so you need to ask God about that. But I'm
telling your men you need to understand it because it's
not going to as far as I know, it's not
going to change. And to think about it, you don't
want it to change. If you have a child, you
want that mother to nurture that baby. Okay, I know
you want to have your needs met too, but you're
(31:45):
going to have to understand that you need to fall
in line. Okay, you just do. Are you going to
be frustrated? So anyway, I hope I explained that.
Speaker 4 (31:54):
Yes, you did, all right to say. The next question
is from Charlie. Do you find men get jealous of
not being first in a relationship after kids?
Speaker 3 (32:05):
Yes, that's the whole problem. That's what I'm trying to
help you to understand. You can be jealous all you want,
but it's not going to change how that woman is.
And this is what I've learned. The only thing you
can change is yourself. Okay. If you change yourself, then
the people around you will change. And if you become
(32:26):
more understanding of your wife or the mother of your child,
the woman will start to understand you more. Okay, So
you can't change women. You can't, all right. All you
can do is change how you respond to her. And
I will tell you that has been the most important
(32:47):
thing that has happened in my relationship with my wife
is that I learned I have to change how I
respond to her. And if I change how I respond
to her, she will change how she responds to me.
The more I understand her and I accept her as
the way she is, the more she will understand me
(33:10):
and accept me as the way I am. And that
is what I think true intimacy is is that we
understand each other and we accept each other, and we
accept each other through the changes that we go through.
We try to understand the changes, we try to support
each other through those changes. So that is that's how
(33:30):
you get over the jealousy. It's just change your mindset
and things around you will change. Let's do one more
question and then I'll finish up. I think I got
like two or three more slaves. Okay, So any other questions?
Speaker 4 (33:44):
Yes, okay. The last one is are you saying it
is okay to give each other space?
Speaker 2 (33:49):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (33:49):
Yes, hey, I will tell you that's another thing that
saved our marriage is that sometimes you have to go
to your separate corners and cool down and come back.
It's almost like you, I don't want to you know,
like a prize fight or whatever. You know, they say,
you know, you get all tangled up in in a fight,
and then they separate you out and they say, hey,
(34:10):
go to your corners, and then you come back. And
a lot of times when we see that a discussion,
I won't say an argument, that a discussion is starting
to move into an argument, we separate, We say, let's
let's just let's just think about this. And the key
is give your time, give yourself time to respond instead
(34:32):
of react, because a lot of times we just automatically
react to something our spouse does and we don't take
time to respond and think about it, because then what
happens is you get into this big argument, and what
happens after a while you start to think about it
and you're like, why did I do that? Why did
I do that? Why did I say that? I didn't
mean that? So just don't react, just stop, pull shut
(34:55):
your mouth, think about the situation and say how can
I resolve this where it doesn't lead into some long
extended argument that could lead into something that we don't
want so just take your time listen to your wife.
And that's what I had to listen. I had to
learn listen to her and then just shut up. Okay,
(35:15):
think about it and then come back. And sometimes you
don't even need an answer, just listen, and sometimes just
the woman being able to get it out and knowing
that you heard her, you don't even need to respond.
So that's something that is learned. And I'll tell you
if you if you follow that, just be quiet sometimes, okay,
(35:36):
just be quiet and take your time before you respond
to your spouse. And I guess that can go both
ways for the woman and the man. All right. Uh,
And I am so glad that the men are asking
the questions because the men sometimes don't look deep. We
are we are, you know, my wife says. You know,
men are simple. We're all a lot of times men
(35:57):
just look at the surface. And I want you, I
want to encourage you to go deeper into what a
relationship should be. You know, it's more than satisfying your
sexual desires. It's more than that. It can be more
beautiful than that, it really can. So all right, So
the role of women's independence. I told you these women
(36:19):
they're like I'm not going to take this anymore. These
hormonal shifts prompt identity reflection and they begin to say
what do I want in my life? Second half, they've
been you know, for decades, they've been doing household work responsibilities.
It causes humulative stress combined with harmonal fatigue. This can
(36:39):
become an emotional breaking point. And then also these women
as they get into their fifties, see, it used to
be they were bound by the home. The man went
out and worked, women stayed home and took care of
the kids in the house. So they didn't have the
financial autonomy to say, I'm not satisfied, I'm leaving. So
unlike past generations, women over fifty often have careers, and
(37:02):
very successful careers and financial independence, enabling them to leave
unsatisfying marriages. My wife is a physician. She could leave
whenever she wanted to. She doesn't necessarily need me. However,
emotionally we need each other, okay, and she needs me
I need her. We are we are two who have
(37:25):
become one, all right, But if you haven't done that.
The woman who does look deep, she looks deep into
a relationship. She's not functioning on the surface. So if
she feels unsatisfied deep in her soul, she will leave.
She will tell you she doesn't need you. She'll say
(37:46):
I can do bad by myself, all right. So this
is a new age for women, is that they are
not totally dependent upon a man for that financial security.
So men, you need to offer more than just financial
security if you want to maintain your marriage. It's not
about sex and finances. It's about having a deep relationship
(38:09):
with your spouse. So women initiate sixty six percent of
all divorces. Right, That's what I'm telling you. You know me,
and you think, oh yeah, I'll go find me another woman.
I know these women are saying I'm not going to
stay in an unsatisfying marriage, and I will tell you,
I'm going to be very honest with you. Is what
(38:29):
prompted this transformation in me is that my wife, I
was frustrated at where I was in life. I felt
like I could do more. I had this career where
you know, I was going out speaking and teaching and
communicating and trying to, you know, help people, and I
felt like I was stuck in my office. And then
I had some other things going on with my extended
(38:51):
family that I was frustrated. And my wife said, it's
difficult for me to be with you when you're like this,
and that struck a chord with me, and I said,
I have to change, and I've changed, and it has
been a wonderful change. And this is why I started
the Age Blueprint Blueprint, This is why I went to Egypt,
(39:11):
this is why here is because my wife said, you
are not living up to your potential. That's why you're frustrated.
And hey, if I hadn't listened, I'm she may have
been a part of that sixty six percent, Okay, And
that's why I'm saying, that thought comes into your mind
(39:32):
and you just have to you have to move beyond it.
And that's kind of what we did. So let me
go to this next one and why a baby boom
is affected now. When I used to go out and speak,
you know, ten to fifty years ago, I talked about
how baby boomers changed how we delivered babies where it
used to be, you know, in the old h I
love Lucy is that you know, the husband's in the
(39:55):
waiting room and the woman is off and she's having
a baby, and the man smoking a cigar, all that stuff.
Baby boomers said, we're not doing it like that. We're
not going to act like having a baby is an
illness where we go off to the hospital. So they
started to make these labor and delivery rooms look like
a rich Carlton. By the time I finished doing OB,
(40:15):
these rooms were spacious. All the family could be in
there and watch the delivery. They changed how we deliver babies.
They changed OB and then they've changed menopause. Is that
they're saying, I'm not taking this perman and bavarian. Some
of you are not old enough to know that's what
we used to do. If everybody the same thing, And
(40:36):
they're like, no, we're not going to do it that way.
And then so they're also changing the way divorces looked
at all. Right, They're saying, no, I'm not going to
be in this marriage. I don't need the financial security,
I don't need the disconnect, I don't need someone who
is emotionally distant from me. I'll leave. And so the
(40:58):
baby boomers have always changed society. And I'm at the
end of this baby boom general baby boomer generation, and
I have lived through the changes that the baby boomers
have created. So anyway, baby boomers consistently had higher divorce rates.
Great Voice continues this trend again, this women's independence and
(41:20):
women's movement. They feel like they don't have to have
a man. I believe that the man woman relationship is sacred,
but women are finding out that they don't have to
stay in an unsatisfying relationship. Life expectancy extends into the eighties.
Staying in unfulfilling marriages for decades is now unacceptable. Yeah,
(41:41):
you're fifty and you're like, hey, I got thirty more
good years. How do I want to spend those thirty
years again? That's why I started ages this bootprint. I'm like,
I'm sixty five, but I still have energy. I want
to do more. So I decided, Hey, I'm going to
start a podcast. I'm going to start this school community.
I'm going to do all this because I have a
(42:01):
lot more living to do. Harmonal health gap gap mid
life harmonal changes are rarely addressed as a relationship issue.
Many marriages drift apart. Be in biological support could help.
And that's why I'm doing this topic is I want
you to understand that those life changes are hard enough
and if you don't correct the biology changes, it's almost
(42:26):
it's almost inevitable that your marriage could end in a divorce.
Are you're going to just stay in an unsatisfying marriage
because you haven't fixed these biology issues? All right? So
I think this is, yeah, what makes great divorce different.
This is just like a summary. We have complex finances
like say downgrading, move into a different home, or move
(42:48):
into a different country because you can't afford to live
in America anymore. So you have these expaths that are
moving to Africa and move into Portugal and move into
all of these places. And that's very disrupting, and it
can be even though you're going there to relieve stress,
it can be stressful that transition. The emotional impact later life.
(43:09):
Divorce often triggers identity crisis, loneliness, and depression as partners
lose social networks and future plans. That's another issue with divorce,
and you've probably had this happen when you have a
couple that's friends of yours that divorce. Now, all of
a sudden, you have to pick sides. You've met these
people as couples, now they've divorced, and now it disrupts
(43:29):
your whole social network. So now the friends used to
hang out with, they're no more, They're not together anymore,
and usually it just dissolves that whole relationship. So we
talked about housing challenges and then unrecognized root calls hormone imbalances.
So you want to make sure that you are trying
to handle all of these issues. And the first thing
(43:51):
is just to be aware of these issues so that
you can you can tackle them together and work through
them together and not blame each other for your situation.
Here we go, great voice, key takeaways, emotional shifts. We've
really just talked about that. So we have about three
or four more managed. So what I really would like
for you to do is that in our school group,
(44:14):
I am going to create a relationship reset. Course, my
school group is going to go to a subscription service
and I'll be announcing more about that. But I started
this Age's Blueprint School about four or five months ago,
and all I had was a community where I would
(44:36):
give an agelest tip of the day and we would
have people go back and forth and we talk about it. Well,
over the last four months, I've created a lot of content.
You know, I've tried to relate thirty years of my
medical experience and my life experience, my relationship experience, and
(44:57):
how I've gone from being a conventional doctor to a
functional medicine doctor to now I'm becoming a healer and
all spects of all aspects of a person's life where
we're talking about my body, mind and spirit. So I've
done a lot of travel, I've taken a lot of courses.
I've hired mentors to help me to develop myself and
(45:20):
develop a program. So I've spent a lot of time
and a lot of money, and I want to be
able to share it with you, But I have to
place a value on that, and I appreciate everybody who
joined when all I had was a community. But now
we need to move into this next phase where I
can share more and I can help you to implement
(45:42):
some of these some of these changes. So that is
to come, I hope to. I hope to release that
on September the first are as close as I can
to that. Even while I'm here in God if I'm
not out experiencing this culture, I am actually here, and
(46:03):
you can get rid of the slades. I am actually
here in my hotel room developing content, is trying to
develop more information that I can share with you, because
I want my experiences to benefit more than just the
people who come into my office. I want it to
benefit the people who are listening on the podcast, who
(46:25):
follow me on different social medias, because now I understand
is that's how you get a message across. My patient
told me I had to get into social media if
I really wanted people to understand and if I wanted
to combat some of the misinformation that's out there, you
have to fight fire with fire. And so that's what
I'm doing. And I hope that this podcast is helping you.
(46:46):
And if you want to work with me closer, please
join my school group, follow me on my YouTube channel,
follow me on this podcast, Age's Blueprint podcast dot com.
So please connect with me. I want to connect with
you and rebel any more questions. I think we got
a minute or two or not even listen maybe lessen
(47:07):
at any more questions.
Speaker 4 (47:09):
No, doctor, you covered everything.
Speaker 3 (47:11):
Okay, all right, good? So I will see you next week.
I hope. I have to look at my flight information
on Wednesday. I may be traveling next Wednesday. If not,
I may mean if I am, I may pre record something.
It won't be live. But I'll let you know, but
until then, I'm saying goodbye from Akroagana.
Speaker 2 (47:34):
Thanks for joining Doctor Tamler today. If you missed any
part of this show, just check out the podcast wherever
you listen to podcasts. Angel's Blueprint is every Wednesday at
nine am Eastern Time on W FOURHC Radio at W
FOURC dot com. Together, we discovered the ancient secrets to
(47:56):
better health through science and spirituality need for modern times.
Until then, feel free to check out angel'speeprint podcast dot
com and tailor Mvformulations dot com for more information
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The Male Room with Dr. Jesse Mills
As Director of The Men’s Clinic at UCLA, Dr. Jesse Mills has spent his career helping men understand their bodies, their hormones, and their health. Now he’s bringing that expertise to The Male Room — a podcast where data-driven medicine meets common sense. Each episode separates fact from hype, science from snake oil, and gives men the tools to live longer, stronger, and happier lives. With candor, humor, and real-world experience from the exam room and the operating room, Dr. Mills breaks down the latest health headlines, dissects trends, and explains what actually works — and what doesn’t. Smart, straightforward, and entertaining, The Male Room is the show that helps men take charge of their health without the jargon.