May 15, 2025 • 31 mins
Journey with Paul Walmsley, a well-known regular at Stephanos, as his peaceful dinner is interrupted by a fast-acting stranger who not only steals his meal but also hands him a mysterious packet beneath the table. This encounter marks the start of exhilarating adventures with the enigmatic American adventurer, Joseph H. Parker and his charming daughter, Eve. Please note that there is an alternative narration for section 8, both renditions are equally compelling and we invite you to enjoy either or both.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Chapter thirteen of An Amiable Charlatan. This is a LibriVox recording.
All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more
information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox dot org. Recording
by Kirsten Webber. An Amiable Charlatan by E. Phillips Oppenheim,
(00:22):
Chapter thirteen, The shorn Lamb. I never remembered seeing mister
Bundercombe look more cheerful than when at his urgent summons.
I left even in the drawing room and made my
way into the study. He was standing on the hearth rug,
with the tails of his morning coat drooping over his arms,
and an expression on his face that I can only
(00:43):
describe as cherubic. Seated on chairs A yard or so
away from him were two visitors of whom, at first
glance I formed a most unfavorable opinion. One was a
flashly dressed middle aged man with fair mustache, puffy cheeks,
and a souperfluity of jewelry. The other I might at
first have taken for an undertaker's mute. He had an
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exceedingly red nose, watery eyes, and was dressed in deep
mourning paul. Mister Bundercombe said let me introduce you to
Captain Duncan Banister and mister Cheap, his solicitor. The two
men rose and bowed in turn. I found it difficult
to maintain a tolerant attitude, but I did my best.
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These two gentlemen, mister Bundercombe continued, cheerfully, have come round
to blackmail me, sir. Captain Banister exclaimed, with a great
show of anger, mister Bundercombe, the person called mister Cheap echoed,
they made rather a poor show of it. However, mister Bundercombe,
wholly unperturbed by their righteous indignation, smiled still benignly upon them.
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Come come, he expostulated, this is a business interview. Whyman's words.
Captain Banister rose to his feet. He turned toward me.
Mister Bundercombe, he explained, either wilfully or otherwise misrepresents the
object of our coming. Tis possible that his nationality may
have something to do with it. I have always understood
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that the standard among Americans with regard to affairs of
honor scarcely so high as in this country. Mister Bundercombe
has the habit of taking a common sense view of things.
I remarked, I cannot criticize his attitude because I am
ignorant of the particulars, since he has sent for me. However,
I presume that I am to be informed. Quite so,
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Quite so, mister Bundercombe murmured. You go ahead, Captain Banister,
you tell your story. My story, Captain Banister said, is
told in a very few words. I made the acquaintance
of mister Bundercombe in the smoking room at Milan some
months ago. We met several times, and on one occasion
I presented him to a friend of mine, the widow
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of a colonel in the Indian Army, Missus Delaporte. At
this stage, mister Bundercombe, who was quite irrepressible, winked at
me slowly. I took no notice of him whatever. On
the particular evening to which I refer, Captain Bernister continued,
it was suggested by Missus Delaporte, I think that we
should go round to her rooms and blay schmand a fair.
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There were five of us altogether, mister Bundercombe, Missus delaport myself,
a mister Dimmesdale, and the honorable Montague Pelham, a young
gentleman of the best family. When we arrived at Missus
Delaport's rooms. However, I transpired that mister Bundercombe was wholly
ignorant of schremand affair, and the game was accordingly changed
to poker. In the course of the game, I was
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shocked to detect mister Bundercombe cheating for Missus Delaport's sake.
I conceived it best to try and hush up the
matter entirely. I looked upon mister Bundercombe as card sharper
of the ordinary type, and I simply blamed myself for
having introduced him to my friends. I accordingly made some
excuse to terminate the party. Did any one else beside yourself?
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I inquired abserve this alleged irregularity. Both Missus Delaport and
mister Dimsdale distinctly saw the very flagrant piece of cheating
that first attracted my attention. Captain Banister declared they understood
at once the position. When I suggested the termination of
the game, our party was broken up hurriedly. Since that
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day I have not seen mister Bundercombe. I turned toward
my prospective father in law. Mister Bundercombe for the first time,
was looking a little annoyed. Do you mean to tell me,
he said, addressing Captain Banister, that both you and young j.
Dimsdale and Missus Delaport's army pass up that ace without
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a doubt. Captain Banister assented, a little taken aback, guess
my fingers must be getting a little clumsy. Mister Bundercombe sighed, well, well,
there the matter is. But mister Bundercombe, I asked, seriously,
what have you to say in reply to Captain Banister's statement.
Don't seem to me there is much to be said.
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Mister Bundercombe replied, but he accuses you of cheating. I exclaimed, Oh,
I cheated, all right, mister Bundercombe admitted readily. Captain Banister
turned toward me triumphantly. After that confession from mister Bundercombe
before witnesses, he said, I do not imagine that our
case will require very much more proof. I was completely nonplussed.
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Mister Bundercombe's confession was so ready, his demeanor so unalterably
good tempered. I went on to ask, however, what certainly
seemed to me the most important question under the circumstances.
If you are content, Captain Banister, I inquired, to let
the matter drop a few months ago? Why are you
here now? Ah, mister Bundercombe exclaimed, put his finger on
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the crucks of the whole affair, straight off, smart young fellow,
my son in law, that is to be now, then,
Captain Banister, mister cheap, speak up like men and let
us know the truth. You let me walk out of
that flat, Captain Banister, and were jolly glad to see
the back of me. Why this visit with a legal
adviser and both of you with faces as long as fiddles.
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Captain Banister ignored mister Bundercombe and addressed me, Mister Bundercombe,
he said, calling himself by the bye mister Parker as
an American card shopper was of no interest to us.
We are simply ashamed and disgusted to think that we
should have permitted such a person the entree to our
society when we discovered, however, that instead of being a
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professional card sharper, Captain Banister continued with emphasis, mister Bundercombe
enjoys a recognized position in society, and that he is
reputed to be a man of great wealth. The affairs
woms an altogether different complexion worth going for, Ain't I
mister Bundercombe chuckled, I feel sure, mister Walmsey. Captain Minister
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continued that some portion of your sympathy, at any rate,
as an English gentleman of social distinction, will be with
us in this matter. The affair we were content to
let drop against mister Parker the adventurer, we feel it
our duty to pursue against mister Bundercombe, a millionaire. We
would save time, I remarked coldly, if you were to
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put your demands in plain words, what is it you
want or expect from mister Bundercombe, Not what you appear
to think, Sir Captain Banister replied stiffly, we require from
mister Bundercombe a written confession and his resignation from the
Sydney Club. The what club, I asked, dubiously, The Sydney Club,
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Captain Banister repeated, with dignity. The club in question may
not be very large, but it is quite well known,
and I had the misfortune to act as mister Bundercombe sponsor. There.
I glanced toward my prospective father in law. He nodded.
They put me up for some sort of a part house,
he admitted, and I handed over a tenor. I think
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it was for my subscription. Rotten a little hole somewhere
near the Haymarket. I've never been in since. I'll resign
with pleasure and write a confession of your misdemeanor, Sir,
Captain Denister persisted. Mister Bundcombe scratched his chin. I'll write
an account of the whole affair, he remarked dryly. Captain
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Benister took up his hat. I regret, he declared that
mister Bundercombe's attitude does not encourage a continuation of this conversation.
We will not detain you further. Gentlemen, mister Cheap also rose.
They moved toward the door. Much obliged to you for calling,
mister Bundercombe said hospitably, drop in and have a little
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game of cards with me any afternoon. You like I
am a bit out of practice, but I fancy I'm
still in your class. Captain Banister turned round. Suddenly. He
replaced his hat upon the table and stood with folded arms. Sir,
he announced, I have changed my mind. You have insulted me.
Five minutes ago, I was prepared to treat you like
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a gentleman. I would have accepted your resignation from the
Sydney Club and your written apology. Now I have changed
my mind. You have slandered me, both by imputation and directly.
How much, mister Bundercombe asked, cheerfully, five thousand pounds? Captain
Bernister answered firmly, how much more? If I call you
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a lying card, sharping swindler, mister Bundercombe demanded, with unabated
good humor. Captain Banister looked dangerous, but he ignored the question.
You have your terms, sir, he said, unless you are
prepared to hand over the summer five thousand pounds my solicitor,
mister cheap heare, will at once commence proceedings against you
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with reference to that affair Missus Delapot's flat. Remember, we
have four witnesses to bring into court as to your
having cheated, not including your son in law here who
had your confession. For any counter charge you might be
disposed to make, Captain Banister concluded, you have not a
single scrap of evidence. Got me on toast, haven't they, Paul.
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Mister Bundercombe observed cheerfully, five thousand pounds has a lot
of money, Captain Banister, he added, I'll pay your taxi
fare back to wherever you came from. That's my best offer.
Captain Banister turned toward the door. Come along, mister cheap,
he said, you know my address, sir. Talk this matter
over with your with mister Walmsey, if you please. If
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we hear nothing from you on Monday morning, a wretch
will be issued. Before Monday, mister Bundercombe declared, in a
hollow voice, my body will be found in attames. Kick
em out Walmsey and look after the coats in the hall.
I infuse to shade more civility into my leave taking
than mister Bundercombe's words invited. As soon as the door
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was closed behind the two men, I returned to the study.
Mister Bundercombe was still standing upon the hearth rug, but
the smile had faded from his lips. He looked at
me a little anxiously rotten lot of thieves, he remarked.
I told you they were here for blackmail. It's a
beastly of fa I pointed out gloomily. And you see
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they've nothing to lose with a lawyer who's standing in
with them in taking the case to court, and you're
just up for a couple of very good clubs. What
did happen simple as a b c. Mister Bundercombe explained,
you see, these two fellows, Dimsdale and Pellam really looked
like mugs. I knew the banister was a wrong and
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from the first and missus Delaport, of course, was in
the thing. When they proposed a game of cards, I
chipped in, thinking to watch the fun. When we started playing,
Dimsdale and Pellam were the losers. Then they began to
get at me. Banister palmed the king into his hand
and I palmed the n ace. That seemed fair enough, eh,
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Mister Bundercombe's expression as he looked up at me with
the expression of appealing child, I bit my lip. A
minute or two later I tumbled to the whole situation.
He went on, Dimmesdale and Pellam weren't jays at all.
It was a gang of four and they raked me
in for the mug. After I'd tumbled to that, I
must confess I took some interest in the game. If
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they had given me another quarter of an hour, I
should have won every tip there was going my boy.
Mister Bundercombe went on a sudden grinned transfiguring his expressive countenance.
It was worth a fortune to see their faces. I
was a bit out of practice, but I guarantee I'd
make a living with my fingers and a pack of
cards anywhere. Yet, and defied detection. I had em all
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guessing before long. When Paul, you should have seen their
faces when they tumbled to it. I tell you, they
bundled me out in double quick time. Then I laughed
all the way home. Four sharks to pitch upon me
as a victim. He began to laugh again, but the
sight of my grave face checked him. He at once
assumed the appearance of a penitent. Where did you come
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across them? Again? I asked, I met missus Delaporte the
other day, he said. Down at Rainlaw be chatted a little.
While I couldn't feel any ill will against the woman.
I'd enjoyed my evening so thoroughly. Then some people stopped
and talked to me, and she found out who I was.
Soon afterwards she began to throw out hints of a
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willingness to marry again. Perhaps I wasn't very tactful. Anyway,
she seemed a little huffed when she left me. And
here we are, say, do you think those joshers can
do anything? It rather depends, I replied, upon their own reputations.
You'd better let me make a few inquiries. I'll have
to get off now Eve's waiting. I'll call round and
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see Mycelsta later in the day. Shame to bother you,
mister Bundercombe, regretted, so long the affair mister Bundercombe had
treated with his customary light highness seemed likely to develop
most unpleasantly. Within forty eight hours he was the recipient
of a writ from the firm of solicitors with which
mister Cheap was connected. And though inquiries went to prove
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that Captain Banister Missus Dellaport and their associates, who are
certainly not people of the highest respectability, there was yet
nothing definite against them. My solicitor, to whom I took
mister Bundercombe most regretfully advised him to settle out of court.
The friends mister Bundercombe is now making and may make
later in life, the lawyer remarked, will certainly not appreciate
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the adventurous spirit that er induced him to make acquaintances
among certain class of people. Therefore, in the interests of
my client, mister Walmsey as well as your own, mister Bundercombe,
he concluded, I am afraid I must advise you very
much against my own inclinations to settle this matter. Mister
Bundercombe left the lawyers off s thoroughly depressed. It isn't
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the he declared gloomily. It's being bested by this little
gang of thieves that irritates me. I am sure. I
told him that mister Wyman's advice is sound. If the
case goes into court and comes up before the committee,
even of a rotten club like the Sydney, I am
afraid you would have to withdraw your membership from other places,
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and you might find the affair continually cropping up and
causing you annoyance. Mister Bundercombe heaved a mighty sigh. We've
got two days left, he said. If nothing happens before then,
I'll pay up. Mister Bundercombe rang me up on the
morning of the last day appointed for his decision. We've
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got a conference on Paul, he announced objectedly. Will you
come round here for me at quarter to eleven. I
assented and arrived at the house in Prince's Gardens A
few minutes before that time. Eve met me in the hall.
Please tell me, dear, she begged, as she drew me
into the morning room, why daddy is so low spirited.
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T isn't anything serious, I assured her. It's just a
little trouble arising from one of his adventures. We shall
get out of it all right, poor daddy, she exclaimed.
I'm sure he has had no sleep for two nights.
I heard him walking up and down his room. Well,
it will all be over in a day, I promised.
After all, tony means a little money. Daddy does so
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hate to get the worst of anything, she sighed. And
I am afraid from the looks of his face that
this time he's in a fix. I am afraid so too,
I agreed. Never mind, we have done the best we can,
and we are going to settle it up once and
for all to day. Perhaps he'll tell you about it. Afterwards,
we heard a door slam on mister Bundercombe's voice. He's
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asking for you, he whispered. Hurry along and come back
as soon as you got this business over. I found
mister Bundercombe exceedingly chastened, but in all other respects his
usual self. We are calling for mister Wyman's, he said,
in Lincoln's inn Fields. And afterward we are going round
to Missus Delaport's flat. We are going to meet banister
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there and his lawyer. Why do we concern ourselves in
the matter at all, I asked, as we drove off.
I don't see why we can't leave the lawyers to
do this final settlement. Mister Bundercomb shook his head. You
leave too much to lawyers in this country, he remarked.
We generally like to see the thing through ourselves over
at home, even if we take a lawyer along. This
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is an unpleasant business, if you like, but there's no
good in shirking it. We called for mister Wyman's and
drove on to Missus Delaport's flat. We were at once
admitted into an overheated and over perfumed room, and found
Captain Banister, Missus Delaport, and mister Cheap awaiting us. The
Their demeanor betokened anxiety. Missus Delaport alone made a little
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conversation and the habits of a lifetime asserting themselves. She
made eyes at mister Bundercombe. Mister Bundercombe, however, but conducted
himself very much like the deacon of a chapel in
the presence of his minister. His natural good humor seemed
to have departed. His manners matched the unusual solemnity of
Zattia Madam, he said, bowing to missus Delaport, mister Cheap
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and Captain Banister. I have suggested this conference because I
believe in settling these affairs myself and not leaving everything
to lawyers. No disrespect present company. I have made an
idiot of myself, and I am ready to pay a
certain amount. Mister Cheap rose to his feet. He was
sitting in front of a writing desk with a clean
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sheet of paper in front of him, as though prepared
to take notes of the proceedings so that there may
be no possible misunderstanding. He intervened, My clients will take
not penny less than five thousand pounds. Mentrude, and I,
mister Bundercombe, declared, sadly, but very firmly, will not give
a penny more than four thousand pounds. Mister Cheap shrugged
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his shoulders, as though to intimate that the conference was
at an end. Captain Banister made a few remarks to
the effect that if he had not been a moderate
man and willing to conduct the afan and gentlemanly manner
he should have asked for ten thousand. Missus Delaport alluded
to five thousand pounds, as though the amount represented the
outcome of a day's shopping. It was astonishing how little
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they seemed to regard the value of money. Now, mister
Bundercombe went on, if I've brought you altogether here on
false pretenses, I am sorry. There's nothing to be done
in that case but to say good morning and meet
in the law court. But he added, striking the back
of a chair with his clenched fist, and looking more
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like Napoleon than I had ever seen him. I swear,
by the word of Joseph H. Bundercombe, which has never
yet been broken, that I will not hand over one
cent more than four thousand pounds. The protests were this timely.
Little weaker mister Bundercombe sat with folded arms, with his
eyes fixed upon the ceiling, and an air of being
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altogether disinterested in the proceedings, while the three who comprised
the other party whispered together. Presently, mister Cheap rose to
his feet. Mister Wymans, he began punctiliously addressing the lawyer first,
and mister Bundercombe. My clients are only too anxious to
end this unhappy matter. They feel that their demands have
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been most moderate, But at my advice, they have consented
to accept a reduction of five hundred pounds. Mister Bundercombe
rose heavily to his feet. Mister Wymans, he said, and Paul,
come along. I do not bargain. I wish you all
good morning. He turned toward the door, and we followed him.
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It was already open when we were called back. Captain
Banister and mister Cheap were whispering eagerly together. Mister Cheap
rose once more to his feet. In order to prove
hest how entirely devoid my clients are of mercenary considerations,
they agree mister Bundercombe to accept the sum of four
thousand pounds. Mister Bundercombe put down his hat again. Then
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he drew a sheet of paper from his pocket. Condition
number one, then, he observed, is now agreed upon. We
proceed to condition number two. Missus delaport, Captain Banister and
mister Cheap, he went on earnestly, I have been guilty
of an indiscretion. The proof of which is in your hands.
Having decided to make London my home for a time,
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I desire one cent for all to extinguish all possibility
of this affair ever cropping up again in any shape
or form. Mister Cheap rose to his feet. Sir, he
said to mister Bundercombe, my clients will give you their
written undertaking that the affair shall be consigned to O Vivian.
Mister Bundercombe waved him down. My reasons for feeling so
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strongly on the matter, he continued, will be appreciated by you,
Captain Banister, as a man of position and in society.
Captain Banister bowed when I tell you that my future
son in law, mister Walmsey m P has proposed me
for membership in two of the most exclusive clubs in London.
This affair therefore must be killed beyond any matter of doubt.
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I am handing over to you four thousand pounds, which
is a very considerable sum. But in return for it,
I desire that my future immunity be purchased by your
signatures to this document. Mister Cheap rose at once to
his feet, a document, he observed. Let me read it,
mister Bundercombe, handed it over. Mister Cheap read it out loud.
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We the unde signed desire to apologize most sincerely to
mister Joseph H. Bundercombe for any allegations we have made
against him with regard to a certain episode that took
place on March eighteenth or thereabout in the flat of
Missus Delaport. We admit that we were mistaken in the supposition,
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which we certainly entertained at the time, that mister Bundercombe
had been guilty of cheating, and we withdraw such allegations
unreservedly and tender our apologies. Ridiculous. Captain Banister exclaimed absurd.
Missus Delaport echoed, I may add mister Cheap joined in
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that I could not possibly recommend my clients to sign
such a document. Mister Bundercombe took up his hat when
I started out this morning, he declared. I felt convinced
that this conference would come to nothing. I told mister
Wymans here that I was prepared to settle, but on
my own terms, and my own terms only. I don't
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want any undertaking not to molest me in the future.
That isn't good enough. I want to be able to
show a document such as you have there, which completely
exculpates me from any charges that might at any time
be brought. And without it, he added, once more, bringing
his fist down upon the back of the chair, I
do not part with one penny of my four thousand pounds.
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Mister Cheap read out a document he himself had prepared,
but mister Bundercombe waved it away. Come Paul, he said
to me, with a sigh, Come, mister Wymans, I disclaim
all responsibility for the failure of this conference. I have
done my best. It cannot matter a snap of the
fingers to our friends here in what form the document's
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couch that they give me in exchange for my four
thousand pounds. Since they are so particular about a trifle,
I have finished with them. He led the way toward
the door, and there was an appearance of finality about
his tone and shoulders, exceedingly convincing we had reached the threshold,
and were indeed indulging in a little skirmish as to
who should pass through the door first. When mister Cheap's
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resigned voice checked us my clients, he announced, slowly, will
sign your document, mister Bundercombe. They protest. They protest vigorously
against its wording. But they are anxious to show you
in how a large, spirited and gentlemanly a manner. They
wished this affair to be concluded once more. They yield.
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Mister Bundercombe, without any signs of exultation, returned to his
former place, put down his hat upon the chair, and
drew a check book from his breast coat pocket. If
you will give me a seat and a pen, he said,
I will write you a check for the amount. Captain
Banister stared at the check book. He glanced at mister Cheap,
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and mister Cheap very vigorously shook his head. I am sorry,
he objected, but my glance cannot think of accepting a check.
In settlement of this matter, mister Bundercombe began to show
symptoms of annoyance. Less my soul, he exclaimed, isn't the
check of Joseph H. Bundercombe good enough for you? Mister
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Cheap laid his hand soothingly upon mister Bundercombe's shoulder. It
is that we doubt your check, sir, he pointed out.
But in a transaction of this sort is best that
no evidences of a lasting nature. Should exist. A check
is not, as you know, legal tender, and to check
my client certainly could not accept. Mister Bundercombe folded up
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his check book and replaced it in his pocket. Then
what are you going to do about it? He asked?
Where is your bank? Mister Cheap inquired in pall, mall.
Mister Bundercombe answered, then I am afraid. Mister Cheap decided
there is nothing for it but to ask you to
repair there and cash your own check. Mister Bundercombe rose
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to his feet. All right, he agreed, I suppose we'd
better finish the affair. Well, where about it? One of
you had better come with me. Captain Banister promptly volunteered.
He and I and mister Bundercombe descended the stairs and
entered the car. We pulled up in a few minutes
at the door of mister Bundercombe's bank. Will you come
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in with me, mister Bundercombe invited, turning to Captain Banister.
Captain Banister excused himself. I will wait here with mister Walmsley,
he said, if you will allow me. Mister Bundercombe departed
inside the bank and reappeared in the course of a
few minutes. His breast coat pocket was bulging on our
way back. He drew out five packets of bank notes,
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which he counted carefully. Captain Banister watched him out of
the corner of his eye with a hungry expression. We
were only absent from the flat altogether about a quarter
of an hour, and the rest of the affair was
promptly settled. The notes were counted by mister cheap The
document signed by Captain Banister and Missus Dellaport. I am sure,
Captain Banister, declared, holding the notes in his left hand,
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that no one can be more glad than Missus Delaport
and myself that this little affair has been concluded so amicably.
If you will allow me, mister Bundercombe, to offer you
a little refreshment, Mister Bundercombe sighed, well, he said, I
suppose it's all day's work for you people. I don't
mind admitting, though money wasn't so easily earned in my days,
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that I can watch four thousand pounds go without feeling it.
Thank you. That'll do nicely, he added, accepting the brandy
and soda Captain Banister handed him. Mister Wymans looked on
with stan disapproval. Then I must say I sympathized with him.
Mister Bundercombe, however, not only drained the glass with relish,
but accepted the outstretched hand of Captain Banister, and afterwards
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Choquan's also with Missus delaport if you are passing at
any time, she whispered in his ear. I had had
enough of it, and I dragged mister Bundercombe away. We
drove back to Prince's gardens in somewhat ominous silence. Mister
Wymans would have taken his leave, but mister Bundercombe begged
him to come into the library. One moment, he insisted, James,
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he said, addressing the butler, mister Wymans will stay to lunch.
One moment mister Bundercombe went to the telephone. Mechanically, he
handed me the additional receiver. He asked for a number,
and presently received a reply. Say is that Captain Banister
I'm speaking to? He said, I thought I recognized the voice.
This is mister Bundercombe. Yes, yes, no, there's nothing we'd forgotten.
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I just rang you up. Though. To give you a
word of advice, you want to be just a leetle
careful where you try to change those notes. What do
you mean, sir, I heard Captain Banister demand, in startled accents,
what do you mean, mister Bundercombe. Well, mister Bundercombe continued,
those notes are just about the cleverest things I ever
(29:39):
came across. But after all they aren't exactly the genuine article.
I got four thousand pounds worth of them from a
young fellow I was interested in, and I had them
put in a safe at my bank so that no
one should get into trouble. Just occurred to me, since
we began our little negotiations that I saw a good
way of making use of them. I had only four
thousand pounds worth, so I had to beat you down
(30:01):
a bit. However, that'll be all right, Captain, only as
I say, use them a bit carefully. Jove, ain't he
making the telephone sing? Mister Bundercombe added, turning to me,
I guess I'll ring off. He put down the receiver
once more. The accustomed smile was creeping over his face.
Mister Wymans was looking dazed. The butler had entered the
(30:24):
room with the cocktails. Say Paul, mister Bundercombe expostulated, you
didn't really think I was parting with four thousand pounds
to a sloppy gang like that, did you? I knew
a young chap who was very clever at making those notes,
he explained to mister Wymans. I liked him and converted him,
and I sent him over to the States where he's
(30:45):
got a good situation and is working honestly for his living.
This was the remainder of his stock. I had him
lying in the safe deposit of the bank, meaning some
day to destroy him. You've got that apology, all right,
mister Winement slowly smiled. He raised his glass to his lips.
You are a very clever man, mister Bundercombe, he said.
(31:09):
End of Chapter thirteen, recorded by Kirsten Webber.
Chapter thirteen of An Amiable Charlatan. This is a LibriVox recording.
All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more
information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox dot org. Recording
by Kirsten Webber. An Amiable Charlatan by E. Phillips Oppenheim,
(00:22):
Chapter thirteen, The shorn Lamb. I never remembered seeing mister
Bundercombe look more cheerful than when at his urgent summons.
I left even in the drawing room and made my
way into the study. He was standing on the hearth rug,
with the tails of his morning coat drooping over his arms,
and an expression on his face that I can only
(00:43):
describe as cherubic. Seated on chairs A yard or so
away from him were two visitors of whom, at first
glance I formed a most unfavorable opinion. One was a
flashly dressed middle aged man with fair mustache, puffy cheeks,
and a souperfluity of jewelry. The other I might at
first have taken for an undertaker's mute. He had an
(01:06):
exceedingly red nose, watery eyes, and was dressed in deep
mourning paul. Mister Bundercombe said let me introduce you to
Captain Duncan Banister and mister Cheap, his solicitor. The two
men rose and bowed in turn. I found it difficult
to maintain a tolerant attitude, but I did my best.
(01:26):
These two gentlemen, mister Bundercombe continued, cheerfully, have come round
to blackmail me, sir. Captain Banister exclaimed, with a great
show of anger, mister Bundercombe, the person called mister Cheap echoed,
they made rather a poor show of it. However, mister Bundercombe,
wholly unperturbed by their righteous indignation, smiled still benignly upon them.
(01:50):
Come come, he expostulated, this is a business interview. Whyman's words.
Captain Banister rose to his feet. He turned toward me.
Mister Bundercombe, he explained, either wilfully or otherwise misrepresents the
object of our coming. Tis possible that his nationality may
have something to do with it. I have always understood
(02:11):
that the standard among Americans with regard to affairs of
honor scarcely so high as in this country. Mister Bundercombe
has the habit of taking a common sense view of things.
I remarked, I cannot criticize his attitude because I am
ignorant of the particulars, since he has sent for me. However,
I presume that I am to be informed. Quite so,
(02:31):
Quite so, mister Bundercombe murmured. You go ahead, Captain Banister,
you tell your story. My story, Captain Banister said, is
told in a very few words. I made the acquaintance
of mister Bundercombe in the smoking room at Milan some
months ago. We met several times, and on one occasion
I presented him to a friend of mine, the widow
(02:52):
of a colonel in the Indian Army, Missus Delaporte. At
this stage, mister Bundercombe, who was quite irrepressible, winked at
me slowly. I took no notice of him whatever. On
the particular evening to which I refer, Captain Bernister continued,
it was suggested by Missus Delaporte, I think that we
should go round to her rooms and blay schmand a fair.
(03:15):
There were five of us altogether, mister Bundercombe, Missus delaport myself,
a mister Dimmesdale, and the honorable Montague Pelham, a young
gentleman of the best family. When we arrived at Missus
Delaport's rooms. However, I transpired that mister Bundercombe was wholly
ignorant of schremand affair, and the game was accordingly changed
to poker. In the course of the game, I was
(03:38):
shocked to detect mister Bundercombe cheating for Missus Delaport's sake.
I conceived it best to try and hush up the
matter entirely. I looked upon mister Bundercombe as card sharper
of the ordinary type, and I simply blamed myself for
having introduced him to my friends. I accordingly made some
excuse to terminate the party. Did any one else beside yourself?
(04:02):
I inquired abserve this alleged irregularity. Both Missus Delaport and
mister Dimsdale distinctly saw the very flagrant piece of cheating
that first attracted my attention. Captain Banister declared they understood
at once the position. When I suggested the termination of
the game, our party was broken up hurriedly. Since that
(04:23):
day I have not seen mister Bundercombe. I turned toward
my prospective father in law. Mister Bundercombe for the first time,
was looking a little annoyed. Do you mean to tell me,
he said, addressing Captain Banister, that both you and young j.
Dimsdale and Missus Delaport's army pass up that ace without
(04:46):
a doubt. Captain Banister assented, a little taken aback, guess
my fingers must be getting a little clumsy. Mister Bundercombe sighed, well, well,
there the matter is. But mister Bundercombe, I asked, seriously,
what have you to say in reply to Captain Banister's statement.
Don't seem to me there is much to be said.
(05:07):
Mister Bundercombe replied, but he accuses you of cheating. I exclaimed, Oh,
I cheated, all right, mister Bundercombe admitted readily. Captain Banister
turned toward me triumphantly. After that confession from mister Bundercombe
before witnesses, he said, I do not imagine that our
case will require very much more proof. I was completely nonplussed.
(05:31):
Mister Bundercombe's confession was so ready, his demeanor so unalterably
good tempered. I went on to ask, however, what certainly
seemed to me the most important question under the circumstances.
If you are content, Captain Banister, I inquired, to let
the matter drop a few months ago? Why are you
here now? Ah, mister Bundercombe exclaimed, put his finger on
(05:54):
the crucks of the whole affair, straight off, smart young fellow,
my son in law, that is to be now, then,
Captain Banister, mister cheap, speak up like men and let
us know the truth. You let me walk out of
that flat, Captain Banister, and were jolly glad to see
the back of me. Why this visit with a legal
adviser and both of you with faces as long as fiddles.
(06:16):
Captain Banister ignored mister Bundercombe and addressed me, Mister Bundercombe,
he said, calling himself by the bye mister Parker as
an American card shopper was of no interest to us.
We are simply ashamed and disgusted to think that we
should have permitted such a person the entree to our
society when we discovered, however, that instead of being a
(06:38):
professional card sharper, Captain Banister continued with emphasis, mister Bundercombe
enjoys a recognized position in society, and that he is
reputed to be a man of great wealth. The affairs
woms an altogether different complexion worth going for, Ain't I
mister Bundercombe chuckled, I feel sure, mister Walmsey. Captain Minister
(07:00):
continued that some portion of your sympathy, at any rate,
as an English gentleman of social distinction, will be with
us in this matter. The affair we were content to
let drop against mister Parker the adventurer, we feel it
our duty to pursue against mister Bundercombe, a millionaire. We
would save time, I remarked coldly, if you were to
(07:21):
put your demands in plain words, what is it you
want or expect from mister Bundercombe, Not what you appear
to think, Sir Captain Banister replied stiffly, we require from
mister Bundercombe a written confession and his resignation from the
Sydney Club. The what club, I asked, dubiously, The Sydney Club,
(07:41):
Captain Banister repeated, with dignity. The club in question may
not be very large, but it is quite well known,
and I had the misfortune to act as mister Bundercombe sponsor. There.
I glanced toward my prospective father in law. He nodded.
They put me up for some sort of a part house,
he admitted, and I handed over a tenor. I think
(08:03):
it was for my subscription. Rotten a little hole somewhere
near the Haymarket. I've never been in since. I'll resign
with pleasure and write a confession of your misdemeanor, Sir,
Captain Denister persisted. Mister Bundcombe scratched his chin. I'll write
an account of the whole affair, he remarked dryly. Captain
(08:25):
Benister took up his hat. I regret, he declared that
mister Bundercombe's attitude does not encourage a continuation of this conversation.
We will not detain you further. Gentlemen, mister Cheap also rose.
They moved toward the door. Much obliged to you for calling,
mister Bundercombe said hospitably, drop in and have a little
(08:46):
game of cards with me any afternoon. You like I
am a bit out of practice, but I fancy I'm
still in your class. Captain Banister turned round. Suddenly. He
replaced his hat upon the table and stood with folded arms. Sir,
he announced, I have changed my mind. You have insulted me.
Five minutes ago, I was prepared to treat you like
(09:07):
a gentleman. I would have accepted your resignation from the
Sydney Club and your written apology. Now I have changed
my mind. You have slandered me, both by imputation and directly.
How much, mister Bundercombe asked, cheerfully, five thousand pounds? Captain
Bernister answered firmly, how much more? If I call you
(09:29):
a lying card, sharping swindler, mister Bundercombe demanded, with unabated
good humor. Captain Banister looked dangerous, but he ignored the question.
You have your terms, sir, he said, unless you are
prepared to hand over the summer five thousand pounds my solicitor,
mister cheap heare, will at once commence proceedings against you
(09:50):
with reference to that affair Missus Delapot's flat. Remember, we
have four witnesses to bring into court as to your
having cheated, not including your son in law here who
had your confession. For any counter charge you might be
disposed to make, Captain Banister concluded, you have not a
single scrap of evidence. Got me on toast, haven't they, Paul.
(10:13):
Mister Bundercombe observed cheerfully, five thousand pounds has a lot
of money, Captain Banister, he added, I'll pay your taxi
fare back to wherever you came from. That's my best offer.
Captain Banister turned toward the door. Come along, mister cheap,
he said, you know my address, sir. Talk this matter
over with your with mister Walmsey, if you please. If
(10:36):
we hear nothing from you on Monday morning, a wretch
will be issued. Before Monday, mister Bundercombe declared, in a
hollow voice, my body will be found in attames. Kick
em out Walmsey and look after the coats in the hall.
I infuse to shade more civility into my leave taking
than mister Bundercombe's words invited. As soon as the door
(10:57):
was closed behind the two men, I returned to the study.
Mister Bundercombe was still standing upon the hearth rug, but
the smile had faded from his lips. He looked at
me a little anxiously rotten lot of thieves, he remarked.
I told you they were here for blackmail. It's a
beastly of fa I pointed out gloomily. And you see
(11:18):
they've nothing to lose with a lawyer who's standing in
with them in taking the case to court, and you're
just up for a couple of very good clubs. What
did happen simple as a b c. Mister Bundercombe explained,
you see, these two fellows, Dimsdale and Pellam really looked
like mugs. I knew the banister was a wrong and
(11:38):
from the first and missus Delaport, of course, was in
the thing. When they proposed a game of cards, I
chipped in, thinking to watch the fun. When we started playing,
Dimsdale and Pellam were the losers. Then they began to
get at me. Banister palmed the king into his hand
and I palmed the n ace. That seemed fair enough, eh,
(11:59):
Mister Bundercombe's expression as he looked up at me with
the expression of appealing child, I bit my lip. A
minute or two later I tumbled to the whole situation.
He went on, Dimmesdale and Pellam weren't jays at all.
It was a gang of four and they raked me
in for the mug. After I'd tumbled to that, I
must confess I took some interest in the game. If
(12:21):
they had given me another quarter of an hour, I
should have won every tip there was going my boy.
Mister Bundercombe went on a sudden grinned transfiguring his expressive countenance.
It was worth a fortune to see their faces. I
was a bit out of practice, but I guarantee I'd
make a living with my fingers and a pack of
cards anywhere. Yet, and defied detection. I had em all
(12:44):
guessing before long. When Paul, you should have seen their
faces when they tumbled to it. I tell you, they
bundled me out in double quick time. Then I laughed
all the way home. Four sharks to pitch upon me
as a victim. He began to laugh again, but the
sight of my grave face checked him. He at once
assumed the appearance of a penitent. Where did you come
(13:05):
across them? Again? I asked, I met missus Delaporte the
other day, he said. Down at Rainlaw be chatted a little.
While I couldn't feel any ill will against the woman.
I'd enjoyed my evening so thoroughly. Then some people stopped
and talked to me, and she found out who I was.
Soon afterwards she began to throw out hints of a
(13:27):
willingness to marry again. Perhaps I wasn't very tactful. Anyway,
she seemed a little huffed when she left me. And
here we are, say, do you think those joshers can
do anything? It rather depends, I replied, upon their own reputations.
You'd better let me make a few inquiries. I'll have
to get off now Eve's waiting. I'll call round and
(13:49):
see Mycelsta later in the day. Shame to bother you,
mister Bundercombe, regretted, so long the affair mister Bundercombe had
treated with his customary light highness seemed likely to develop
most unpleasantly. Within forty eight hours he was the recipient
of a writ from the firm of solicitors with which
mister Cheap was connected. And though inquiries went to prove
(14:12):
that Captain Banister Missus Dellaport and their associates, who are
certainly not people of the highest respectability, there was yet
nothing definite against them. My solicitor, to whom I took
mister Bundercombe most regretfully advised him to settle out of court.
The friends mister Bundercombe is now making and may make
later in life, the lawyer remarked, will certainly not appreciate
(14:36):
the adventurous spirit that er induced him to make acquaintances
among certain class of people. Therefore, in the interests of
my client, mister Walmsey as well as your own, mister Bundercombe,
he concluded, I am afraid I must advise you very
much against my own inclinations to settle this matter. Mister
Bundercombe left the lawyers off s thoroughly depressed. It isn't
(14:59):
the he declared gloomily. It's being bested by this little
gang of thieves that irritates me. I am sure. I
told him that mister Wyman's advice is sound. If the
case goes into court and comes up before the committee,
even of a rotten club like the Sydney, I am
afraid you would have to withdraw your membership from other places,
(15:20):
and you might find the affair continually cropping up and
causing you annoyance. Mister Bundercombe heaved a mighty sigh. We've
got two days left, he said. If nothing happens before then,
I'll pay up. Mister Bundercombe rang me up on the
morning of the last day appointed for his decision. We've
(15:40):
got a conference on Paul, he announced objectedly. Will you
come round here for me at quarter to eleven. I
assented and arrived at the house in Prince's Gardens A
few minutes before that time. Eve met me in the hall.
Please tell me, dear, she begged, as she drew me
into the morning room, why daddy is so low spirited.
(16:01):
T isn't anything serious, I assured her. It's just a
little trouble arising from one of his adventures. We shall
get out of it all right, poor daddy, she exclaimed.
I'm sure he has had no sleep for two nights.
I heard him walking up and down his room. Well,
it will all be over in a day, I promised.
After all, tony means a little money. Daddy does so
(16:23):
hate to get the worst of anything, she sighed. And
I am afraid from the looks of his face that
this time he's in a fix. I am afraid so too,
I agreed. Never mind, we have done the best we can,
and we are going to settle it up once and
for all to day. Perhaps he'll tell you about it. Afterwards,
we heard a door slam on mister Bundercombe's voice. He's
(16:45):
asking for you, he whispered. Hurry along and come back
as soon as you got this business over. I found
mister Bundercombe exceedingly chastened, but in all other respects his
usual self. We are calling for mister Wyman's, he said,
in Lincoln's inn Fields. And afterward we are going round
to Missus Delaport's flat. We are going to meet banister
(17:06):
there and his lawyer. Why do we concern ourselves in
the matter at all, I asked, as we drove off.
I don't see why we can't leave the lawyers to
do this final settlement. Mister Bundercomb shook his head. You
leave too much to lawyers in this country, he remarked.
We generally like to see the thing through ourselves over
at home, even if we take a lawyer along. This
(17:28):
is an unpleasant business, if you like, but there's no
good in shirking it. We called for mister Wyman's and
drove on to Missus Delaport's flat. We were at once
admitted into an overheated and over perfumed room, and found
Captain Banister, Missus Delaport, and mister Cheap awaiting us. The
Their demeanor betokened anxiety. Missus Delaport alone made a little
(17:52):
conversation and the habits of a lifetime asserting themselves. She
made eyes at mister Bundercombe. Mister Bundercombe, however, but conducted
himself very much like the deacon of a chapel in
the presence of his minister. His natural good humor seemed
to have departed. His manners matched the unusual solemnity of
Zattia Madam, he said, bowing to missus Delaport, mister Cheap
(18:16):
and Captain Banister. I have suggested this conference because I
believe in settling these affairs myself and not leaving everything
to lawyers. No disrespect present company. I have made an
idiot of myself, and I am ready to pay a
certain amount. Mister Cheap rose to his feet. He was
sitting in front of a writing desk with a clean
(18:38):
sheet of paper in front of him, as though prepared
to take notes of the proceedings so that there may
be no possible misunderstanding. He intervened, My clients will take
not penny less than five thousand pounds. Mentrude, and I,
mister Bundercombe, declared, sadly, but very firmly, will not give
a penny more than four thousand pounds. Mister Cheap shrugged
(19:02):
his shoulders, as though to intimate that the conference was
at an end. Captain Banister made a few remarks to
the effect that if he had not been a moderate
man and willing to conduct the afan and gentlemanly manner
he should have asked for ten thousand. Missus Delaport alluded
to five thousand pounds, as though the amount represented the
outcome of a day's shopping. It was astonishing how little
(19:24):
they seemed to regard the value of money. Now, mister
Bundercombe went on, if I've brought you altogether here on
false pretenses, I am sorry. There's nothing to be done
in that case but to say good morning and meet
in the law court. But he added, striking the back
of a chair with his clenched fist, and looking more
(19:45):
like Napoleon than I had ever seen him. I swear,
by the word of Joseph H. Bundercombe, which has never
yet been broken, that I will not hand over one
cent more than four thousand pounds. The protests were this timely.
Little weaker mister Bundercombe sat with folded arms, with his
eyes fixed upon the ceiling, and an air of being
(20:06):
altogether disinterested in the proceedings, while the three who comprised
the other party whispered together. Presently, mister Cheap rose to
his feet. Mister Wymans, he began punctiliously addressing the lawyer first,
and mister Bundercombe. My clients are only too anxious to
end this unhappy matter. They feel that their demands have
(20:28):
been most moderate, But at my advice, they have consented
to accept a reduction of five hundred pounds. Mister Bundercombe
rose heavily to his feet. Mister Wymans, he said, and Paul,
come along. I do not bargain. I wish you all
good morning. He turned toward the door, and we followed him.
(20:48):
It was already open when we were called back. Captain
Banister and mister Cheap were whispering eagerly together. Mister Cheap
rose once more to his feet. In order to prove
hest how entirely devoid my clients are of mercenary considerations,
they agree mister Bundercombe to accept the sum of four
thousand pounds. Mister Bundercombe put down his hat again. Then
(21:12):
he drew a sheet of paper from his pocket. Condition
number one, then, he observed, is now agreed upon. We
proceed to condition number two. Missus delaport, Captain Banister and
mister Cheap, he went on earnestly, I have been guilty
of an indiscretion. The proof of which is in your hands.
Having decided to make London my home for a time,
(21:34):
I desire one cent for all to extinguish all possibility
of this affair ever cropping up again in any shape
or form. Mister Cheap rose to his feet. Sir, he
said to mister Bundercombe, my clients will give you their
written undertaking that the affair shall be consigned to O Vivian.
Mister Bundercombe waved him down. My reasons for feeling so
(21:57):
strongly on the matter, he continued, will be appreciated by you,
Captain Banister, as a man of position and in society.
Captain Banister bowed when I tell you that my future
son in law, mister Walmsey m P has proposed me
for membership in two of the most exclusive clubs in London.
This affair therefore must be killed beyond any matter of doubt.
(22:21):
I am handing over to you four thousand pounds, which
is a very considerable sum. But in return for it,
I desire that my future immunity be purchased by your
signatures to this document. Mister Cheap rose at once to
his feet, a document, he observed. Let me read it,
mister Bundercombe, handed it over. Mister Cheap read it out loud.
(22:45):
We the unde signed desire to apologize most sincerely to
mister Joseph H. Bundercombe for any allegations we have made
against him with regard to a certain episode that took
place on March eighteenth or thereabout in the flat of
Missus Delaport. We admit that we were mistaken in the supposition,
(23:05):
which we certainly entertained at the time, that mister Bundercombe
had been guilty of cheating, and we withdraw such allegations
unreservedly and tender our apologies. Ridiculous. Captain Banister exclaimed absurd.
Missus Delaport echoed, I may add mister Cheap joined in
(23:25):
that I could not possibly recommend my clients to sign
such a document. Mister Bundercombe took up his hat when
I started out this morning, he declared. I felt convinced
that this conference would come to nothing. I told mister
Wymans here that I was prepared to settle, but on
my own terms, and my own terms only. I don't
(23:46):
want any undertaking not to molest me in the future.
That isn't good enough. I want to be able to
show a document such as you have there, which completely
exculpates me from any charges that might at any time
be brought. And without it, he added, once more, bringing
his fist down upon the back of the chair, I
do not part with one penny of my four thousand pounds.
(24:09):
Mister Cheap read out a document he himself had prepared,
but mister Bundercombe waved it away. Come Paul, he said
to me, with a sigh, Come, mister Wymans, I disclaim
all responsibility for the failure of this conference. I have
done my best. It cannot matter a snap of the
fingers to our friends here in what form the document's
(24:30):
couch that they give me in exchange for my four
thousand pounds. Since they are so particular about a trifle,
I have finished with them. He led the way toward
the door, and there was an appearance of finality about
his tone and shoulders, exceedingly convincing we had reached the threshold,
and were indeed indulging in a little skirmish as to
who should pass through the door first. When mister Cheap's
(24:52):
resigned voice checked us my clients, he announced, slowly, will
sign your document, mister Bundercombe. They protest. They protest vigorously
against its wording. But they are anxious to show you
in how a large, spirited and gentlemanly a manner. They
wished this affair to be concluded once more. They yield.
(25:14):
Mister Bundercombe, without any signs of exultation, returned to his
former place, put down his hat upon the chair, and
drew a check book from his breast coat pocket. If
you will give me a seat and a pen, he said,
I will write you a check for the amount. Captain
Banister stared at the check book. He glanced at mister Cheap,
(25:35):
and mister Cheap very vigorously shook his head. I am sorry,
he objected, but my glance cannot think of accepting a check.
In settlement of this matter, mister Bundercombe began to show
symptoms of annoyance. Less my soul, he exclaimed, isn't the
check of Joseph H. Bundercombe good enough for you? Mister
(25:55):
Cheap laid his hand soothingly upon mister Bundercombe's shoulder. It
is that we doubt your check, sir, he pointed out.
But in a transaction of this sort is best that
no evidences of a lasting nature. Should exist. A check
is not, as you know, legal tender, and to check
my client certainly could not accept. Mister Bundercombe folded up
(26:16):
his check book and replaced it in his pocket. Then
what are you going to do about it? He asked?
Where is your bank? Mister Cheap inquired in pall, mall.
Mister Bundercombe answered, then I am afraid. Mister Cheap decided
there is nothing for it but to ask you to
repair there and cash your own check. Mister Bundercombe rose
(26:37):
to his feet. All right, he agreed, I suppose we'd
better finish the affair. Well, where about it? One of
you had better come with me. Captain Banister promptly volunteered.
He and I and mister Bundercombe descended the stairs and
entered the car. We pulled up in a few minutes
at the door of mister Bundercombe's bank. Will you come
(26:57):
in with me, mister Bundercombe invited, turning to Captain Banister.
Captain Banister excused himself. I will wait here with mister Walmsley,
he said, if you will allow me. Mister Bundercombe departed
inside the bank and reappeared in the course of a
few minutes. His breast coat pocket was bulging on our
way back. He drew out five packets of bank notes,
(27:19):
which he counted carefully. Captain Banister watched him out of
the corner of his eye with a hungry expression. We
were only absent from the flat altogether about a quarter
of an hour, and the rest of the affair was
promptly settled. The notes were counted by mister cheap The
document signed by Captain Banister and Missus Dellaport. I am sure,
Captain Banister, declared, holding the notes in his left hand,
(27:42):
that no one can be more glad than Missus Delaport
and myself that this little affair has been concluded so amicably.
If you will allow me, mister Bundercombe, to offer you
a little refreshment, Mister Bundercombe sighed, well, he said, I
suppose it's all day's work for you people. I don't
mind admitting, though money wasn't so easily earned in my days,
(28:06):
that I can watch four thousand pounds go without feeling it.
Thank you. That'll do nicely, he added, accepting the brandy
and soda Captain Banister handed him. Mister Wymans looked on
with stan disapproval. Then I must say I sympathized with him.
Mister Bundercombe, however, not only drained the glass with relish,
but accepted the outstretched hand of Captain Banister, and afterwards
(28:29):
Choquan's also with Missus delaport if you are passing at
any time, she whispered in his ear. I had had
enough of it, and I dragged mister Bundercombe away. We
drove back to Prince's gardens in somewhat ominous silence. Mister
Wymans would have taken his leave, but mister Bundercombe begged
him to come into the library. One moment, he insisted, James,
(28:52):
he said, addressing the butler, mister Wymans will stay to lunch.
One moment mister Bundercombe went to the telephone. Mechanically, he
handed me the additional receiver. He asked for a number,
and presently received a reply. Say is that Captain Banister
I'm speaking to? He said, I thought I recognized the voice.
This is mister Bundercombe. Yes, yes, no, there's nothing we'd forgotten.
(29:17):
I just rang you up. Though. To give you a
word of advice, you want to be just a leetle
careful where you try to change those notes. What do
you mean, sir, I heard Captain Banister demand, in startled accents,
what do you mean, mister Bundercombe. Well, mister Bundercombe continued,
those notes are just about the cleverest things I ever
(29:39):
came across. But after all they aren't exactly the genuine article.
I got four thousand pounds worth of them from a
young fellow I was interested in, and I had them
put in a safe at my bank so that no
one should get into trouble. Just occurred to me, since
we began our little negotiations that I saw a good
way of making use of them. I had only four
thousand pounds worth, so I had to beat you down
(30:01):
a bit. However, that'll be all right, Captain, only as
I say, use them a bit carefully. Jove, ain't he
making the telephone sing? Mister Bundercombe added, turning to me,
I guess I'll ring off. He put down the receiver
once more. The accustomed smile was creeping over his face.
Mister Wymans was looking dazed. The butler had entered the
(30:24):
room with the cocktails. Say Paul, mister Bundercombe expostulated, you
didn't really think I was parting with four thousand pounds
to a sloppy gang like that, did you? I knew
a young chap who was very clever at making those notes,
he explained to mister Wymans. I liked him and converted him,
and I sent him over to the States where he's
(30:45):
got a good situation and is working honestly for his living.
This was the remainder of his stock. I had him
lying in the safe deposit of the bank, meaning some
day to destroy him. You've got that apology, all right,
mister Winement slowly smiled. He raised his glass to his lips.
You are a very clever man, mister Bundercombe, he said.
(31:09):
End of Chapter thirteen, recorded by Kirsten Webber.
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