Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to Beyond Mindset Limits with Tisha Marie Kine. Here
we explore how unlocking your mindset can pave the way
for unlimited success. Discover how to create opportunities through legal
challenges and transform your business and life with effective public
relations strategies. Get ready to elevate your journey and maximize
(00:25):
your potential. Now let's welcome your host, Tisha Marie Kin.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Hi, you guys, welcome back to Beyond Mindset Limits. Where
I am your host, Tisha Marie Kin. I am an
executive counsel, I am a radio show host. I'm an
expert mediator and communicator. I'm a breakthrough mindset coach, and
I am a clinical hypnotherapist, a number one best selling
(00:57):
international author and our I'm recognized for my work all
around the world. I help Fortune five hundred executives, visionary leaders,
and high performing entrepreneurs, guiding them to unlock their influence,
align with their purpose, and create lasting impact. I have
(01:18):
a unique blend of legal expertise, leadership strategy, and transformational coaching.
I help individuals and organizations rewire the subconscious, release emotional weight,
and elevate their relationship with money, power and self worth,
and thank you for coming to the show today, because
(01:40):
today this one's going to be good. It's going to
be a really good conversation. So I wanted to talk
about how something that it's really really close to my heart,
and today's show is called having discernment, right, and I
believe that we are entering a new era of leadership,
(02:01):
a new era of coaching, a new era of healing
and transformation. And this is beyond mindset limits. We're just
not talking about mindset today. We're talking about sovereignty. We're
talking about ethics, we're talking about the sacred relationship of leadership.
We're talking about the future transformation, and we are calling
(02:25):
it higher. So thank you and welcome to the show.
I'm really excited because I have gone through several different
coaching programs throughout my life to heal from past wounds
that I had, and I want to talk about that
because being in the new Era, in the New Earth,
(02:47):
we are building and we are creating. And this is
where charisma is not going to be enough. A big
room is not going to be enough, a powerful offer,
a breakthrough on stage. It's just not anough anymore. We're
going to have to create what so many people are
calling in the New Earth. They're calling transformation and conversations
(03:12):
up to a higher calling of ethics. We have to
talk about who's leading the room. We have to talk
about congruents today, alignment, subconscious responsibility. We have to talk
about the difference between helping someone access their truth and
projecting a truth onto them. And before I go any further,
(03:34):
I want to say this very clearly. This episode is
not about calling anyone out. No, this episode is not
about naming names either. This episode is not about attacking
the coaching industry, because what I've seen in the last
couple decades is ethics really come right up to the line,
(03:57):
either crossing boundaries or coming so clear to the line
that That's why I wanted to talk about it today.
This episode is about naming a pattern that I believe
many people have experience but not always had language to explain.
And that's why I have a radio show, because I
(04:18):
get to put language behind how you're feeling. So let's
dive in, because sometimes we walk into transformational rooms with
our hearts wide open. We are there because we want
to grow, We're there because we want to heal. We
were there because we want to expand, and we're there
(04:40):
because there is a version of us that we know
is waiting on the other side of our current identity.
And when we are in those rooms, we are vulnerable,
even if we are powerful, even if we're successful, even
if we're educated, even if we have emotional INTI intelligence
(05:00):
on board, even if we're trained in the work ourselves.
I know this because I'm a clinical hypnotherapist, and this
is the work that I do. I understand the subconscious mind.
I understand the critical factor. I understand how powerful language is.
I understand how quickly a person can move into a
(05:23):
heightened state of suggestibility when the room is charged, and
when the leader is powerful, and when the group is watching,
and when emotion is present. And yet I realized something
this past weekend. I've recently had an experience that showed
me something at an even deeper level than what I've
(05:46):
been able to access in the past. It showed me
the difference between transformation and projection. It showed me the
difference between being opened and being overridden. It showed me
the difference this past weekend between someone helping you find
your truth and someone assigning meaning to your life from
(06:09):
their own frame, because when you look through a frame,
that gets narrowed. Right. So if you look through a
frame just looking at me from an executive council perspective,
you miss that my nails are hot pink, and I'm
also a published artist. If you look at me from
(06:29):
a radio show host perspective, you missed. You miss that
I'm a clinical hypnotherapist. On the ind if you look
at me like an expert mediator, you miss that I'm
a clinical hypnotherapist. You miss all of this because your
frame has been narrowed into one thing, and that distinction
(06:52):
is everything. Because the subconscious mind is a sacred ground.
And I don't know if you can hear the passion
in my voice today, because the subconscious cannot be ghosts
written by anyone. It's a sacred ground. It's not a playground.
(07:13):
It's not a sales tool. It's not a stage prop.
It's not a place where someone gets to walk in
a sign meaning and call it a breakthrough. When someone
is emotionally open, the leader has a responsibility to be clean,
clean with their words, clean with their power, clean with
(07:36):
their interpretation, clean with their energy, clean with their offer,
clean with the way that they hold another's person's identity
because when someone is in a heightened emotional state, especially
in front of a room, their critical factor can soften.
And let me break this down to you because as
a clinical hypnotherapist, I know about the critical factor, and
(08:00):
basically just for purposes here for a hypnosis language, the
critical factor is the hypnotherapy concept. It's the conscious, analytical
part of your mind that filters suggestions before they reach
the subconscious. So you have your conscious mind on the top,
(08:23):
you have your critical factor. It's a line in the middle,
and then the subconscious brain. For those who my husband's
a neuroscience guru guy, right, so he's into neurofitness and neuroscience.
So for him, it's the executive function. It's the cognitive load,
it's the social pressure, it's the thing that predicts air,
(08:47):
it's the emotional regulation. So that's for him. But for me,
as a clinical hypnotherapist, the critical factor, it's basically the
internal gatekeeper. It says, wait, is this the truth? Does
this fit my values? Is this person projecting? Has this
gone too far? Ordinary waking consciousness? The gatekeeper is active. Okay,
(09:15):
So here's what's most important for those of you who
are not familiar with that term. It's that gatekeeper. So
in hypnosis and deep transformation work that softens, that critical
factor softens so the person can access deeper truth and
that can be beautiful and it can be healing. And
(09:36):
this is why I work with executives all across the
planet because I know if we can bypass the critical
factor and they can access their truth, the transformation can
be life changing. And there is an ethical line. And
I'm talking to you about this today because I'm very
(09:57):
congruent and I'm very ethical ethical transformation. The critical factor
softens by consent. In manipulation, the critical factor is bypassed
by pressure. And this is the conversation that I want
to have with you guys today, And this is what
I'm passionate about talking to you today about. Because when
(10:20):
someone is on stage, when the whole room is watching,
when an authority figure is speaking, when emotions are high,
when there's social proof, when there's an expensive program being offered,
when the person wants to be coachable, when they do
not want to appear defensive, when they're trying to stay
(10:42):
open and receive the work, that person can become more
suggestible than they realize a person can be wide awake
and still be in a trance field. And this is why.
You know when you get on the highway and you
step into your automobile and you're traveling down American soil
and you're like, okay, I get from point A to
point B, and you're like, oh, I'm already at point
(11:05):
B and I don't even remember how I got there.
That's a trance field. That's a trance. That's hypnotherapy, that's hypnosis.
And this is why the person leading the room must
be congruent, must be aligned, and be ethical. Now, let
(11:25):
me speak personally for a moment, because you know me,
you know miss Tisha Maury Kane. You guys have been
listening for a while, and I am very authentic and
I'm vulnerable because you know what, life is hard, right
and it gets to be easy and we get to
push easy buttons. So for a moment, I want to
share something with you. I was recently in a transformational
(11:48):
room and I went in all in, and this is
what I've done. I've been in several coaching containers and
that's why I'm a coach, because I've learned from the
best and I've learned from the rest right. And I
went and open, and I went in willing. I went
in ready to look at myself. Anything, any stone left unturned,
(12:08):
I was going to address it. And I'm not someone
who is afraid of deep work. No, I'm not someone
who is afraid to be challenged. No, I mean I
was trained in law school. I love to argue, right.
My mama always told me, Tisha, you're going to be
a great attorney someday, right, because I love to argue.
So challenge me, because you know why, I'll always do
(12:29):
the right thing. And I spent my life inside transformation,
inside law, inside stories, publishing, publicity, coaching, healing and subconscious reprogramming.
And I know what it means to be seen, and
now I certainly know what it means to be challenged.
And I know what it means to have something reflected
(12:52):
back to me that I did not want to look at.
But there was a moment where I was brought into
a process. And after I left the room, after it
was two hours, after the seminar had completed, up after
the three days, it was two hours, and I was angry,
(13:17):
and I didn't know where the anger was coming from.
I was trying to process and being someone who in
the past didn't love myself. I hated looking in the mirror.
Now I have mears all over my home. In the past,
I didn't want to confront myself. I hated myself. I
worked on my psychic ability to be able to exit
my body, astro travel, go out and use all of
(13:40):
my players to be able to be in touch with
the world. And what I realized was the moment I
did the transformational work, the moment I looked within, the
moment I went back to me to start feeling good enough,
was the moment that I had the Holy Trinity come online,
the mind, body, and spirit online, and I was able
(14:01):
to access more so. I loved being challenged. And what
that brought up for me was anger. And I want
to be very honest about this. Anger is not something
I usually default to. I hardly ever in my life
because I've created a life that I love and enjoy,
(14:23):
I hardly ever default to anger. I usually can feel
annoyance pretty good, and I could usually feel frustration, and
I feel disappointment, and I can feel discernment. But anger
doesn't normally hit my emotional bandwagon like it did in
the past right. So when anger came up, I did
(14:48):
not dismiss it. I did not immediately make someone else
wrong either, And I also did not immediately make myself
wrong either. I got curious. I started asking myself, Oh
my gosh, is this anger? Am I angry because something
true was touched inside of me? Am I angry because
(15:10):
I was defensive? Am I angry because I don't want
to look at something? Or Am I angry because something
in that process was unclean? And after sitting with it
and I had some deep integration, I spent the whole
next day deep in integration, deep looking at everything, processing it,
(15:31):
really allowing my own inner wisdom to speak, and I
realized something very profound. The anger was not because I
was unwilling to be challenged. The anger was because my
truth had not been invited forward, meaning had been a
(15:53):
sign assigned to me. The external data points had been
collected and turned into a story about my identity, about
my motives, and about my supposed wounds. And that's different
because there's a difference between someone saying what does this
mean to you? And someone saying this is what this
(16:16):
means about you. There's a difference between someone saying let's
explore what's underneath this, and someone saying I already know
what's underneath this. And there's a difference between someone helping
you access your subconscious truth and someone projecting their narrative
into your subconscious and that distinction matters, especially for those
(16:42):
of us doing transformational work. So, as you can tell
and as you can hear the passion in my voice,
I was angry because the coaching industry has gotten a
bad rap. Sales has gotten a bad rap, because people
have crossed the line of ethics, because ethical coaching does
(17:03):
not strip someone of their authorship. And I know this.
I hold the pin to my life now to be
completely transparent. I help people ghost write their books, right,
I bring it in under their name. I help them.
They give me the framework, I give them suggestions. We
(17:24):
go back and forth bantering what looks for them. And
I help people ghost write their books. But when it
comes to my life, in the past, people tried to
ghost to write my life, and heck no, Once I
got clear, and this is the message for you guys
to listen to too, getting so clear, where discernment comes online,
(17:45):
Where discernment comes so far online that you don't even
have to check up with your itty bitty crappy committee
in your brain. Right Like before, I had this gut feelings,
and I would bring it into my gut I'm like, ooh,
that's not right. And then I'd have to bring it
up to my mind and check and like is that right?
And then I'd bring it back down to my gut.
(18:07):
So I'd do this one, two, three, gut mine gut
to see if it was okay. And now I'm so clear.
I do all the diets. I watch what goes into
my eyes, I watch what goes into my ears, I
watch what goes into my mouth. I do all the diets,
so I'm so clear. I don't drink alcohol, I don't
do drugs. I do more water and exercise and meditation
(18:30):
and prayer. I do all of that so I can
be clear. Because I have the authorship of my life.
No one ever will rewrite the story to my life.
And what I experienced in this transformational room was someone
trying to ghostrite my subconscious. Ethical coaching does not make
(18:54):
the leader the highest authority over someone's inner world. Ethical
coaching helps the person return to their own inner authority.
And that's what I do. I am preaching, and I'm
a preacher, and I'm a teacher because I believe in ethics.
I believe in doing the right thing. Because there's a
lot of powerful leaders out there, and there's a lot
(19:17):
of powerful people leading powerful rooms. Some of them are brilliant,
some of them are deeply gifted. Some read energy, see patterns,
some move very quickly. But skill is not the same
as ethics. Power is not the same as purity. Charisma
is not the same as congruence, and intensity is not
(19:40):
the same as truth. And that's what I want people
to understand. Just because something feels big doesn't mean that
it's clean. Just because something someone cries doesn't mean that
the facilitator was right. Just because someone is activated doesn't
mean that they are healing. Just because someone disagrees does
(20:03):
not mean they are resistant. And just because someone gets
angry doesn't mean that their ego was exposed. To trust me,
I know. Sometimes anger is not resistance, and it's not
Sometimes anger is discernment, and that's what happened for me.
Sometimes anger is the body saying something was crossed, and
(20:28):
anger is your soul saying, hey, wait a minute, this
ain't mine. And sometimes anger is the subconscious saying I
did not consent to that installation, and sometimes anger for me.
From a legal perspective, it's my whole legal team standing
up in saying objection. Foundation assumes facts not in evidence,
(20:52):
And that is exactly what I want to teach today,
because in my experience, the coaching industry has some times
confused emotional intensity with transformation, and it has confused public
exposure with breakthrough. It has confused pressure with leadership, confused
(21:12):
compliance with healing, confused leader's interpretations with the client's truth.
And I believe we are moving into a time where
that will no longer work, not because people are weak,
but because people are becoming more awake, they're becoming more sovereign,
and they're becoming more discerning. And that is why it's
so important to get clear. Get on the diets, no drugs,
(21:37):
no alcohol, Meditate, pray, and I believe prayer is talking
to God. And I believe meditation is listening to God
and whatever God means to you, God of your own understanding.
In my house, we pray to Gus, God, Universe, and Spirit.
We pray to all three because there is this holy trinity,
the power of numbers, right so they can be coachable
(22:02):
and still say no, and they can be challenged and
still reject projection, and they can receive truth without surrendering
their authorship. And this is the new standard. Okay, So
this is the new standard. I want to teach you
guys that we really are being called to a higher
(22:24):
code of conduct. And what I felt. I was very
curious when Anger came on board, because I was like, Okay,
anger is not something I really accessed in them anymore.
In the past. It was in the past I would
get really angry. Right now, I'm like, huh, they're being dumb.
I don't care. I can quickly dismiss them because they
(22:47):
know not what they do. So, and what's fantastic about
this is if you allow yourself to feel all the things,
feel all of the emotions, so that you have access
to your discernment, you won't have to do a gut
(23:08):
head gut check anymore. They lie to us. By the way,
your brain is not in your head. Your brain is
in your guts. So I want to tell you that
right now. And I want to come back. I want
to take a little break, but before we do, I
want to come back, and I'm going to talk about
congruence and walk you through that, So stay tuned. We'll
(23:29):
be back in a few minutes from a few words
from our sponsors to stay tuned. Thanks guys.
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Speaker 1 (25:23):
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Speaker 2 (26:40):
And we're back. Welcome to Beyond Mindset Limits, where we
go beyond surface level thinking and into real transformation, that
kind that changes your life, your business, and who you become.
I am your host, Tisham Marie Kane, and thank you
for the coming to the show today. So before our
(27:02):
break here we were talking about ethics, and I want
to go into discernment when we get in these coaching rooms. Now,
at the end of this I'm going to give you
a pathway to work one on one with me. You
can go to www. Dot t i s ha Marie
Kincai in dot com to do one on one coaching.
(27:24):
But I want to get through the material today because
it's really important, because I'm really passionate about being ethical
and congruent and aligned, and especially when we're holding rooms
and holding space for others. So let's talk about congruents.
Because when you're choosing a coach or a mentor a facilitator,
(27:48):
even like a spiritual leader or a hypnotherapist, a trainer,
anyone who's going to lead you into a deep transformation,
you must pay attention to congruents. Congruence just doesn't mean perfection.
Let me say that again. Congruence does not mean perfection.
None of us are perfect. I'm not perfect. No coach
(28:11):
is perfect, no leader, no room is perfect. But congruence
means alignment. It means there is consistency between what someone
teaches and how they live their life, how they treat people,
and how they handle power, how they handle money, how
they handle vulnerability, and how they respond when someone does
(28:34):
not agree with their frame. A congruent leader does not
need to dominate your interpretation of yourself. A congruent leader
does not need to make you wrong in order for
them to be right. A congruent leader does not need
to use shame as a tool. A congruent leader does
(28:56):
not make you disagree proof you know disagree with them
as proof of your dysfunction. A congruent leader does not
bypass your critical factor and then call your confusion a breakthrough.
A congruent leader can hold intensity without becoming evasive, and
(29:19):
they can challenge you without reducing you, and they can
see your patterns without stripping you of dignity. They can
create a powerful room without making themselves the god of
the room. And that's leadership. I've been in leadership since
I was nineteen years old, and probably even before that,
because I remember in high school I was president of FFA,
(29:42):
right Future Farmers of America, where they taught us how
to do extemporantious speaking and how to lead, you know rooms,
so you're not the god of the room. And I
have been in coaching spaces where the man or the
woman has thought that they are God, and I was like, huh,
(30:02):
So I just stood back and watched and allowed everything
to unfold and thought, Okay, I'm done right, because I
know what clear leadership looks like. And as we build
ethical coaching companies, ethical transformation spaces, and ethical hypnotherapy practices,
(30:22):
ethical spiritual communities, ethical personal development brands, this has to
matter because when people come to us, they are trusting
us with their stories. They're trusting us with their pain,
with their dreams, with their subconscious They're trusting us with
parts of themselves that have not always been felt safe,
(30:47):
especially in big rooms, and we have to honor that right.
As a clinical hypnotherapist, I bypassed that critical factor faction
of the brain in order to help my client rive
at their truth. And hypnotherapy is life changing. Gone is
the old I mean, come on, let's be real. AI
(31:08):
is going to be replacing everything here in the next
couple of years anyway, So God, gone is the old therapist.
Talk therapy, you know, come in, let's talk about you
know why you're sad? No, no, no, hypnotherapy. We go right
into the subconscious mind, bring out your truth, bring it
forward in one session one and done. I don't have years.
I don't have time. I don't have years to work
(31:30):
through the pain. We all have pain. I need a
quick cheat code to go in, rewire the subconscious mind,
give that little girl what she needed back then, and
let's keep on keeping on so that we can help
humanity rise to new levels. This has to matter because
when people come to us, they're trusting us, right, and
(31:54):
we have to honor that. We have to be more
interested in their truth than in our performance in the room,
more interested in their freedom than our authority, more interested
in their self truth than their dependency on us. Right.
(32:14):
This is what I say all the time. If I
am doing my job right, I'm actually working myself out
of a job. If you're coming to me, yes, I
have clients. I have clients who have had eighteen month sessions. Yes,
and those clients have transformed every aspect of their life
(32:36):
because they wanted to go in and do a micro
look at each little facet of their life, and we
transformed it. Yes, we did. But if I'm doing my
job right, I am working myself out of a job.
I don't need you coming back to me like fifteen times. No,
we don't need to do this. Let's get in here,
let's do the change work, and let's keep going. Right,
(32:57):
So let's talk about high ticket rooms for a month.
There is nothing wrong with high ticket rooms. There's nothing
wrong with high ticket coaching, right, and I believe in
the high ticket comes. There's a bulls eye. So if
you can envision if you're traveling down the highway here
in Palm Springs, I know you're out there in LA
and you're here in this across the globe, it's like
(33:20):
a bullseye, right, So the bulls eyes in the middle
that is the authority, that is the coach, that's the hypnotherapist,
and then out from there is you get their coaching team,
and then out from there you get their corporation and
out from there, So the closest you get to the
bulls eye, you know, it gets to be higher ticketing. Right.
(33:40):
I wouldn't say expensive because someone told me last week, Tisha,
you know your prices are kind of expensive, and I said,
compared to what, right, I can manage all of the objections,
My prices are expensive compared to what if I can
transform your whole, entire freaking life in one session. Why
wouldn't that be worth to you?
Speaker 3 (34:01):
Right?
Speaker 2 (34:02):
So, high ticket rooms, there's nothing wrong with that. There's
nothing wrong with premium transformation. There's nothing wrong with investing
in yourself, and I believe investing in proximity, mentorship rooms,
identity capacity expansion, and there's nothing There's something that we
(34:24):
need to be honest about. When a person is emotionally open,
publicly challenged, and then invited into a very expensive program,
the ethics of that process matter. The timing matters, the
language matters, the pressures matters, the nervous system state matters.
(34:47):
The person should be making a decision from clarity, not
from shame, from sovereignty, not from emotional collapse, from alignment,
not from fear or of missing out, from rounded desire,
not from the need to prove they are healed. You know,
when I walked into that coaching space, I'm completely open.
(35:07):
I'm available for it all. My name is Tisha Marie Kane,
and I am here to play a big game. So
if there's anything in my blind spots that I don't see,
I mean truthfully, and I even hate using the word
truthfully because I'm always honest. But to be completely transparent,
if I can't see something, I normally flip it over
(35:28):
to my husband and ask my husband for guidance because
he's right in my inner circle. Right, I'm like, hey,
I'm feeling a certain way. What do you think this means?
You know, what can you see that I'm not seeing?
Speaker 3 (35:39):
Right?
Speaker 2 (35:39):
So I flip it over to someone that's closest to
me because I love him and I trust him and
I married him. Right, So the reality is, if I
can't see what's in there, I ask for someone close
to me, and then I understand the power of the room.
That's why last week my whole segment on beyond mindset
Limits was the power of the room. And I did
that and it was transformational. This time. It was a
(36:02):
different transformation that I have ever experienced. What not to do,
and it's perfect, there's no blaming, there's nothing outside of me.
I had this experience for my own level growth and
it's great. But I'm talking to you today about discern it.
Ethical rooms help you come home to yourself. That does
(36:26):
not mean they're always comfortable. I walked in there open, right.
Real transformation is not always comfortable. Sometimes it's confronting and emotional,
and I saw that right. I thought I had dealt
with some things in the past. And maybe I had,
or maybe it was all smokescreen and mirrors. I don't know,
(36:46):
But all I know is on the on saugh set
of that container, I was mad. I was angry, and
I couldn't ignore it. And I came home and I
went through a whole notebook and journaled everything out and
then said, oh, okay, something fell off. I need to
sleep on it. That didn't resonate with me, right, And
(37:10):
then I started saying, my subconscious belongs to me. That
was that a projection or was that my own truth?
Because your subconscious is not available for someone else's projection.
If you've got a good leader, they're opening you, they're
asking questions, right. I think that's going to be my
(37:30):
next book is good quality Questions. Ask yourself the good
quality questions and then give you guys like one hundred questions.
If you ask yourself these questions and be completely vulnerable
and honest and write them down in your journal, you're
going to get there and you don't have to spend
another dime on coaches again. You see how I'm so
(37:51):
congruent right here on this radio show. I'm already working
myself out of a job again, putting the but in
your court, the ball in your court. I want you
to come to your own truth. But that's why coaches
need coaches sometimes, right, because you can't see the picture
when you're in the frame. But when someone changes the frame,
(38:13):
or someone narrows their frame down too much and doesn't
look at the whole picture. She has hot pink nails
and she's an attorney. What the heck? Right? Not even
once taking into consideration hot pink nails might be she's
an artist and she has a way to express herself. Right.
(38:33):
I want to come help you come to your own truth.
Your pain is not available for someone else's performance. Your
tears are not proof that they're right, your anger is
not proof that they're wrong. Your resistance is not always sabotaged.
And sometimes resistance is wisdom. Listen to that. I speak
(38:57):
about wisdom, right. I had the Executive Wisdom Series radio
show for a minute, and then I have the Wisdom
of the Trees. I talk about wisdom all the time,
and I think education and experience. So education plus experience
equals the wisdom. And I have lived a thousand lifetimes
(39:18):
as this Avatar, Tisha Marie Kane and it all. It
hasn't always been rosy and beautiful like it is now.
I had to go through some garbage, and I had
to go through a coaching room where I wasn't aligned
with too so what was real for me could really
come online. And I'm passionate about this. Sometimes resistance is
(39:39):
the part of you that still shows the truth when
the room is trying to convince you otherwise. And this
is why discernment is so important. Discernment is not judgment,
and it's not cynicism. It's not being closed. It's the
ability to stay open without a bay yourself. And here's
(40:02):
what discernment says, right, So I had to noodle out
on this for the whole freaking day to try to
come and understand, or rather comprehend why I was feeling
so much anger. This is what discernment says. I can
receive what is mine and reject what is not. I
can honor the activation and reject the projection. I can
(40:24):
learn from the room and still leave the frame. I
can be grateful for the experience without agreeing with the interpretation.
I can be open to my truth without surrendering surrendering
authorship right, because nobody gets the pin to my life.
And this is what my radio show is all about.
This is beyond mindset limits because this is not surface
(40:48):
level mindset work. This is not just positive thinking. This
is identity level sovereignty. And I apologize for yelling at
you right now, I love because I'm just ah. I
hope you could feel my energy. Right This is subconscious integrity.
(41:10):
This is leadership at the level of your nervous system.
And I believe this is where the coaching industry has
to go. Right. We need rooms where people are safe
to be powerful. If you go to a seminar, if
you go to a coaching class, if you go to
(41:31):
a retreat, do me a favor and Google or use
AI to run the schematics on the person that is
holding space. Just do that real quick. Please do that
for me, please, because it's going to save you a
world of time money. Right. So, we need rooms where
(41:53):
people are safe. We need rooms where people are safe
to be challenged, and then there's safe to be able
to cry and say no and disagree and have their
own truth and be their own hero. Rooms where work
is not about worshiping the leader, but awakening the person.
So many rooms, it's like this worship of the leader.
(42:14):
I'm like, what, No, it's not about the leader. And
if the leader is congruent, if the leader is an integrity,
if the leader has the highest amount of ethics, the
leader is turning the pin over back to you. Rooms
where the highest outcome is not dependency, but it's sovereignty.
(42:38):
Rooms where people leave more connected to themselves, not less.
And this is our future of you guys, This is
our future. And guess what, you know why I'm so excited.
I am on the ground floor leading rooms, helping people
come into their own sovereignty, come into their own truth.
(42:59):
This is the ground floor where we get to build
back the new Earth. We get to show people what
it is to not just take their money and leave
them emptily right. So, I've seen rooms where people are
emotionally cracked open and then sold to while they're still
(43:20):
trying to find their center. It's disgusting. I've seen people
told that their hesitation was fear. It's disgusting that their
discernment is resistance and their boundaries are blocked. I've seen
where leaders have said, oh you're blocked, Oh you have
no access to that, I'm like, what right, And I'm
(43:40):
saying no, no more. Not in the rooms I build,
not in the work that I lead, not in the
world where I am here to help create. Because when
I build my own rooms, I want it to be different.
I want the room to be powerful. Yes. I want
the room to be transformation. Yes. I want the people
(44:02):
to have breakthroughs. Yes. I want the people to collapse
timelines yes. And I want to go beyond mindset limits
with all of them. Yes. And I also want it
to be clean, and I want it to be ethical,
and I want it to be congruent. And I want
them to keep their own authority and have their own
(44:23):
inner authority. I want it to be that way, and
I will build that. I want people to know they
can be seen without being reduced. I want people to
know their subconscious will be honored, not evaded. Right, There's
a power, There's there's so much power in being seen.
(44:44):
That's why in coaching spaces, you're invited up to the
front of the room, and those who are invited up
to the front of the room normally have the biggest
transformation because they have one hundred people watching them. Right,
But it really puts the leader's ethics and integri online.
But if the leader is moving too quickly or out
(45:06):
of congruence, or you know, ghost writing the subconscious for
the person and having everyone buy in by saying yes, yes, yes,
the power of words. I mean, come on, right. I
want to know that my clients can be seen and
not be reduced. I want them to come into their
(45:27):
own stories. I want people to know that transformation is
not about someone else's ghost writing their wound. It's about
them reclaiming the pin. And maybe this is the deepest
lesson of all. Maybe this is why I'm so passionate
about this topic today, about discernment. It's because I'm an
author and I take full responsibility over my life. No
(45:53):
one gets to rewrite or ghost write my subconscious. No
one gets to take my external data points and make
meaning of them. No one gets to tell you who
you are without inviting your truth into the room. No
one gets to make their interpretation more sacred than you're
inner knowing. And if they do, you are supposed to
(46:19):
be able to feel it and come to it on
your own. You are allowed to name it, you are
allowed to leave, and you're allowed to take the gold
and leave the rest. But today I want to leave
you with questions before you enter the room. I want
you to ask, does this leader make me feel connected
(46:41):
to myself? Right? Normally? I'm so in So if you
don't know anything about the Claires, so you have clairvoyance,
Claire sentient, Claire cognizant. If you don't know anything about
the Claires, I would invite you to go and look
out the Claires. Everyone has Claire abilities, these psychic abilities,
(47:02):
this intuition for those who are not woo woo. But
I teached beyond mindset limits. So I love all the
woo woo stuff and all the stuff, and I'm very
grounded as well, but I know there are layers within
layers within layers of this game called life. And I
also did a radio segment on the game of Life
(47:23):
and how to win. Right. I have give you guys
all the cheat codes because I love you. That's who
I am. So when I tapped into my nervous system
and I was able to bring my clayers fully online
and my clear cognizance online to be able to feel
it out, now, I don't someone even told me once,
oh your gut, your gut's wrong, and I'm like, uh no,
(47:48):
my gut is always right, right, And so I was like,
oh no, So I couldn't trust that person anymore. I'm like, Okay,
you're out of alignment, you're out of congruence. Anyone who
tells me do not trust my gut is cuckoo for
cocoo puffs. Right. So, once you come online and you
bring discernment into your body and you can feel close
(48:11):
your eyes and shut your mouth and take them in
it and feel if someone's asking you for one hundred
thousand dollars and why are the money tomorrow? Does that
feel congruent to you? No? Or yes? It can be right.
I'm not saying it's not possible. I'm saying it's important
(48:33):
to know your truth. It's important to discern what is
your truth. And when I got angry, that anger taught
me something and it was really interesting. I'm like, holy moly,
this is anger. I haven't witnessed anger in a long time.
(48:56):
And I was like, Okay, I get to explore this.
I get to be very vulnerable with myself in my
journal right now and have everything come up about this anger.
And boy, that is the reason why this show today
is called discernment right, because I want to again pass
the baton back to you as a good coach, which
(49:18):
I am. I have influence and credibility and authority in
my space. I wrote beyond Mindset Limits. It's the standard
for CEOs and executives who refuse to be overlooked, undervalued,
or forgotten. This book that I wrote a couple of
weeks ago went number one international best selling author in
(49:39):
forty two hours. Like come on, I am the coach.
And that's why I speak so passionate about this is
making sure that ethics are on the line, making sure
that when you step into these spaces, you know what
you're getting yourself into. Or you know what's great is
(50:00):
don't go alone. Always bring a buddy system so your
best friend you can check check it was that? Was
that something that really happened? Is that? Is that true?
Did you get out of that? When I got out
of that? Right? Because if you go alone, you're like, Okay,
you're only relying on your nervous system, and if you
haven't reset your nervous system, then whoop, it's a lot. Right,
So take someone with you and say, okay, this was
this was in alignment or it was it? Right? Do
(50:23):
they honor your nervous system when you're in the room.
Do they embody what they teach? Right? Do they embody
what they teach? And stop and look around and see
what you see? See what you see? Right? I was
in a high level coaching container where they were making
(50:43):
you know, I don't know, million dollar months. I don't
even know, but they were making million dollar months, and
yet they came in the room looking like crap. I'm
like huh. And I kept that was weird. I kept
like saying, huh, you're making million dollar months, You're living
in a forty seven million dollar home on California coast,
(51:06):
and you come in looking like a homeless guy. Like
I'm like huh. And I just sit there and I'm like,
this is weird. This is incongruent. It's they're not congruent,
and I just I couldn't get past it. I'm like, huh, Okay,
everyone had just invested, you know, anywhere from from five
thousand to ten thousand dollars to be in this room
(51:27):
and the leader comes in and he's not congruent, and
I just said huh wow, okay. But I wrote it down.
I'm like hum, I need to investigate this. Investigate this.
I got curious. Huh what does this mean? Do they
embody what they teach? Do they use emotional vulnerability responsibly? Right?
(51:49):
Do do I feel expanded or do I feel diminished? Right?
So this is my stand. I'm not against coaching. I'm
not against transformation. This is what I teach. I'm not
against high ticket rooms. I'm not against deep transformational work
because this is the work that I do in my
everyday life. I'm not against any of that. I believe
this work with my whole heart. I believe we must
(52:13):
raise the standard. I believe we must build ethical coaching companies.
I believe we must lead congruent rooms, honor the subconscious,
and understand what your truth is. And that's the difference.
Commanding a room is powerful, Holding a room is responsibility,
and the future belongs to leaders who can do both
(52:35):
with integrity. So, if you're listening today and you have
ever left a room feeling confused, reduced, activated, or unsure,
if this has ever happened to you and your truth
was projected on, I want you to follow me. Go
say me too, sign up, get my newsletter today. You
can reach me on all platforms. Tissa Marie Kane, thank
(52:57):
you for another episode of Beyond Mindset Limits. I am
so grateful and I hope to hear you guys next week.
Speaker 1 (53:03):
Thank you, Thank you for joining Tisha Marie Kine for
Beyond Mindset Limits. Tune in every Wednesday at four pm
as the conversation continues around mindset, legal insight, and publishing
as a strategic tool for business positioning. Visit Tishamrie Caine
(53:26):
dot com, Orkins Legal Support dot com for more information
or to schedule your private appointment.
Welcome to Beyond Mindset Limits with Tisha Marie Kine. Here
we explore how unlocking your mindset can pave the way
for unlimited success. Discover how to create opportunities through legal
challenges and transform your business and life with effective public
relations strategies. Get ready to elevate your journey and maximize
(00:25):
your potential. Now let's welcome your host, Tisha Marie Kin.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Hi, you guys, welcome back to Beyond Mindset Limits. Where
I am your host, Tisha Marie Kin. I am an
executive counsel, I am a radio show host. I'm an
expert mediator and communicator. I'm a breakthrough mindset coach, and
I am a clinical hypnotherapist, a number one best selling
(00:57):
international author and our I'm recognized for my work all
around the world. I help Fortune five hundred executives, visionary leaders,
and high performing entrepreneurs, guiding them to unlock their influence,
align with their purpose, and create lasting impact. I have
(01:18):
a unique blend of legal expertise, leadership strategy, and transformational coaching.
I help individuals and organizations rewire the subconscious, release emotional weight,
and elevate their relationship with money, power and self worth,
and thank you for coming to the show today, because
(01:40):
today this one's going to be good. It's going to
be a really good conversation. So I wanted to talk
about how something that it's really really close to my heart,
and today's show is called having discernment, right, and I
believe that we are entering a new era of leadership,
(02:01):
a new era of coaching, a new era of healing
and transformation. And this is beyond mindset limits. We're just
not talking about mindset today. We're talking about sovereignty. We're
talking about ethics, we're talking about the sacred relationship of leadership.
We're talking about the future transformation, and we are calling
(02:25):
it higher. So thank you and welcome to the show.
I'm really excited because I have gone through several different
coaching programs throughout my life to heal from past wounds
that I had, and I want to talk about that
because being in the new Era, in the New Earth,
(02:47):
we are building and we are creating. And this is
where charisma is not going to be enough. A big
room is not going to be enough, a powerful offer,
a breakthrough on stage. It's just not anough anymore. We're
going to have to create what so many people are
calling in the New Earth. They're calling transformation and conversations
(03:12):
up to a higher calling of ethics. We have to
talk about who's leading the room. We have to talk
about congruents today, alignment, subconscious responsibility. We have to talk
about the difference between helping someone access their truth and
projecting a truth onto them. And before I go any further,
(03:34):
I want to say this very clearly. This episode is
not about calling anyone out. No, this episode is not
about naming names either. This episode is not about attacking
the coaching industry, because what I've seen in the last
couple decades is ethics really come right up to the line,
(03:57):
either crossing boundaries or coming so clear to the line
that That's why I wanted to talk about it today.
This episode is about naming a pattern that I believe
many people have experience but not always had language to explain.
And that's why I have a radio show, because I
(04:18):
get to put language behind how you're feeling. So let's
dive in, because sometimes we walk into transformational rooms with
our hearts wide open. We are there because we want
to grow, We're there because we want to heal. We
were there because we want to expand, and we're there
(04:40):
because there is a version of us that we know
is waiting on the other side of our current identity.
And when we are in those rooms, we are vulnerable,
even if we are powerful, even if we're successful, even
if we're educated, even if we have emotional INTI intelligence
(05:00):
on board, even if we're trained in the work ourselves.
I know this because I'm a clinical hypnotherapist, and this
is the work that I do. I understand the subconscious mind.
I understand the critical factor. I understand how powerful language is.
I understand how quickly a person can move into a
(05:23):
heightened state of suggestibility when the room is charged, and
when the leader is powerful, and when the group is watching,
and when emotion is present. And yet I realized something
this past weekend. I've recently had an experience that showed
me something at an even deeper level than what I've
(05:46):
been able to access in the past. It showed me
the difference between transformation and projection. It showed me the
difference between being opened and being overridden. It showed me
the difference this past weekend between someone helping you find
your truth and someone assigning meaning to your life from
(06:09):
their own frame, because when you look through a frame,
that gets narrowed. Right. So if you look through a
frame just looking at me from an executive council perspective,
you miss that my nails are hot pink, and I'm
also a published artist. If you look at me from
(06:29):
a radio show host perspective, you missed. You miss that
I'm a clinical hypnotherapist. On the ind if you look
at me like an expert mediator, you miss that I'm
a clinical hypnotherapist. You miss all of this because your
frame has been narrowed into one thing, and that distinction
(06:52):
is everything. Because the subconscious mind is a sacred ground.
And I don't know if you can hear the passion
in my voice today, because the subconscious cannot be ghosts
written by anyone. It's a sacred ground. It's not a playground.
(07:13):
It's not a sales tool. It's not a stage prop.
It's not a place where someone gets to walk in
a sign meaning and call it a breakthrough. When someone
is emotionally open, the leader has a responsibility to be clean,
clean with their words, clean with their power, clean with
(07:36):
their interpretation, clean with their energy, clean with their offer,
clean with the way that they hold another's person's identity
because when someone is in a heightened emotional state, especially
in front of a room, their critical factor can soften.
And let me break this down to you because as
a clinical hypnotherapist, I know about the critical factor, and
(08:00):
basically just for purposes here for a hypnosis language, the
critical factor is the hypnotherapy concept. It's the conscious, analytical
part of your mind that filters suggestions before they reach
the subconscious. So you have your conscious mind on the top,
(08:23):
you have your critical factor. It's a line in the middle,
and then the subconscious brain. For those who my husband's
a neuroscience guru guy, right, so he's into neurofitness and neuroscience.
So for him, it's the executive function. It's the cognitive load,
it's the social pressure, it's the thing that predicts air,
(08:47):
it's the emotional regulation. So that's for him. But for me,
as a clinical hypnotherapist, the critical factor, it's basically the
internal gatekeeper. It says, wait, is this the truth? Does
this fit my values? Is this person projecting? Has this
gone too far? Ordinary waking consciousness? The gatekeeper is active. Okay,
(09:15):
So here's what's most important for those of you who
are not familiar with that term. It's that gatekeeper. So
in hypnosis and deep transformation work that softens, that critical
factor softens so the person can access deeper truth and
that can be beautiful and it can be healing. And
(09:36):
this is why I work with executives all across the
planet because I know if we can bypass the critical
factor and they can access their truth, the transformation can
be life changing. And there is an ethical line. And
I'm talking to you about this today because I'm very
(09:57):
congruent and I'm very ethical ethical transformation. The critical factor
softens by consent. In manipulation, the critical factor is bypassed
by pressure. And this is the conversation that I want
to have with you guys today, And this is what
I'm passionate about talking to you today about. Because when
(10:20):
someone is on stage, when the whole room is watching,
when an authority figure is speaking, when emotions are high,
when there's social proof, when there's an expensive program being offered,
when the person wants to be coachable, when they do
not want to appear defensive, when they're trying to stay
(10:42):
open and receive the work, that person can become more
suggestible than they realize a person can be wide awake
and still be in a trance field. And this is why.
You know when you get on the highway and you
step into your automobile and you're traveling down American soil
and you're like, okay, I get from point A to
point B, and you're like, oh, I'm already at point
(11:05):
B and I don't even remember how I got there.
That's a trance field. That's a trance. That's hypnotherapy, that's hypnosis.
And this is why the person leading the room must
be congruent, must be aligned, and be ethical. Now, let
(11:25):
me speak personally for a moment, because you know me,
you know miss Tisha Maury Kane. You guys have been
listening for a while, and I am very authentic and
I'm vulnerable because you know what, life is hard, right
and it gets to be easy and we get to
push easy buttons. So for a moment, I want to
share something with you. I was recently in a transformational
(11:48):
room and I went in all in, and this is
what I've done. I've been in several coaching containers and
that's why I'm a coach, because I've learned from the
best and I've learned from the rest right. And I
went and open, and I went in willing. I went
in ready to look at myself. Anything, any stone left unturned,
(12:08):
I was going to address it. And I'm not someone
who is afraid of deep work. No, I'm not someone
who is afraid to be challenged. No, I mean I
was trained in law school. I love to argue, right.
My mama always told me, Tisha, you're going to be
a great attorney someday, right, because I love to argue.
So challenge me, because you know why, I'll always do
(12:29):
the right thing. And I spent my life inside transformation,
inside law, inside stories, publishing, publicity, coaching, healing and subconscious reprogramming.
And I know what it means to be seen, and
now I certainly know what it means to be challenged.
And I know what it means to have something reflected
(12:52):
back to me that I did not want to look at.
But there was a moment where I was brought into
a process. And after I left the room, after it
was two hours, after the seminar had completed, up after
the three days, it was two hours, and I was angry,
(13:17):
and I didn't know where the anger was coming from.
I was trying to process and being someone who in
the past didn't love myself. I hated looking in the mirror.
Now I have mears all over my home. In the past,
I didn't want to confront myself. I hated myself. I
worked on my psychic ability to be able to exit
my body, astro travel, go out and use all of
(13:40):
my players to be able to be in touch with
the world. And what I realized was the moment I
did the transformational work, the moment I looked within, the
moment I went back to me to start feeling good enough,
was the moment that I had the Holy Trinity come online,
the mind, body, and spirit online, and I was able
(14:01):
to access more so. I loved being challenged. And what
that brought up for me was anger. And I want
to be very honest about this. Anger is not something
I usually default to. I hardly ever in my life
because I've created a life that I love and enjoy,
(14:23):
I hardly ever default to anger. I usually can feel
annoyance pretty good, and I could usually feel frustration, and
I feel disappointment, and I can feel discernment. But anger
doesn't normally hit my emotional bandwagon like it did in
the past right. So when anger came up, I did
(14:48):
not dismiss it. I did not immediately make someone else
wrong either, And I also did not immediately make myself
wrong either. I got curious. I started asking myself, Oh
my gosh, is this anger? Am I angry because something
true was touched inside of me? Am I angry because
(15:10):
I was defensive? Am I angry because I don't want
to look at something? Or Am I angry because something
in that process was unclean? And after sitting with it
and I had some deep integration, I spent the whole
next day deep in integration, deep looking at everything, processing it,
(15:31):
really allowing my own inner wisdom to speak, and I
realized something very profound. The anger was not because I
was unwilling to be challenged. The anger was because my
truth had not been invited forward, meaning had been a
(15:53):
sign assigned to me. The external data points had been
collected and turned into a story about my identity, about
my motives, and about my supposed wounds. And that's different
because there's a difference between someone saying what does this
mean to you? And someone saying this is what this
(16:16):
means about you. There's a difference between someone saying let's
explore what's underneath this, and someone saying I already know
what's underneath this. And there's a difference between someone helping
you access your subconscious truth and someone projecting their narrative
into your subconscious and that distinction matters, especially for those
(16:42):
of us doing transformational work. So, as you can tell
and as you can hear the passion in my voice,
I was angry because the coaching industry has gotten a
bad rap. Sales has gotten a bad rap, because people
have crossed the line of ethics, because ethical coaching does
(17:03):
not strip someone of their authorship. And I know this.
I hold the pin to my life now to be
completely transparent. I help people ghost write their books, right,
I bring it in under their name. I help them.
They give me the framework, I give them suggestions. We
(17:24):
go back and forth bantering what looks for them. And
I help people ghost write their books. But when it
comes to my life, in the past, people tried to
ghost to write my life, and heck no, Once I
got clear, and this is the message for you guys
to listen to too, getting so clear, where discernment comes online,
(17:45):
Where discernment comes so far online that you don't even
have to check up with your itty bitty crappy committee
in your brain. Right Like before, I had this gut feelings,
and I would bring it into my gut I'm like, ooh,
that's not right. And then I'd have to bring it
up to my mind and check and like is that right?
And then I'd bring it back down to my gut.
(18:07):
So I'd do this one, two, three, gut mine gut
to see if it was okay. And now I'm so clear.
I do all the diets. I watch what goes into
my eyes, I watch what goes into my ears, I
watch what goes into my mouth. I do all the diets,
so I'm so clear. I don't drink alcohol, I don't
do drugs. I do more water and exercise and meditation
(18:30):
and prayer. I do all of that so I can
be clear. Because I have the authorship of my life.
No one ever will rewrite the story to my life.
And what I experienced in this transformational room was someone
trying to ghostrite my subconscious. Ethical coaching does not make
(18:54):
the leader the highest authority over someone's inner world. Ethical
coaching helps the person return to their own inner authority.
And that's what I do. I am preaching, and I'm
a preacher, and I'm a teacher because I believe in ethics.
I believe in doing the right thing. Because there's a
lot of powerful leaders out there, and there's a lot
(19:17):
of powerful people leading powerful rooms. Some of them are brilliant,
some of them are deeply gifted. Some read energy, see patterns,
some move very quickly. But skill is not the same
as ethics. Power is not the same as purity. Charisma
is not the same as congruence, and intensity is not
(19:40):
the same as truth. And that's what I want people
to understand. Just because something feels big doesn't mean that
it's clean. Just because something someone cries doesn't mean that
the facilitator was right. Just because someone is activated doesn't
mean that they are healing. Just because someone disagrees does
(20:03):
not mean they are resistant. And just because someone gets
angry doesn't mean that their ego was exposed. To trust me,
I know. Sometimes anger is not resistance, and it's not
Sometimes anger is discernment, and that's what happened for me.
Sometimes anger is the body saying something was crossed, and
(20:28):
anger is your soul saying, hey, wait a minute, this
ain't mine. And sometimes anger is the subconscious saying I
did not consent to that installation, and sometimes anger for me.
From a legal perspective, it's my whole legal team standing
up in saying objection. Foundation assumes facts not in evidence,
(20:52):
And that is exactly what I want to teach today,
because in my experience, the coaching industry has some times
confused emotional intensity with transformation, and it has confused public
exposure with breakthrough. It has confused pressure with leadership, confused
(21:12):
compliance with healing, confused leader's interpretations with the client's truth.
And I believe we are moving into a time where
that will no longer work, not because people are weak,
but because people are becoming more awake, they're becoming more sovereign,
and they're becoming more discerning. And that is why it's
so important to get clear. Get on the diets, no drugs,
(21:37):
no alcohol, Meditate, pray, and I believe prayer is talking
to God. And I believe meditation is listening to God
and whatever God means to you, God of your own understanding.
In my house, we pray to Gus, God, Universe, and Spirit.
We pray to all three because there is this holy trinity,
the power of numbers, right so they can be coachable
(22:02):
and still say no, and they can be challenged and
still reject projection, and they can receive truth without surrendering
their authorship. And this is the new standard. Okay, So
this is the new standard. I want to teach you
guys that we really are being called to a higher
(22:24):
code of conduct. And what I felt. I was very
curious when Anger came on board, because I was like, Okay,
anger is not something I really accessed in them anymore.
In the past. It was in the past I would
get really angry. Right now, I'm like, huh, they're being dumb.
I don't care. I can quickly dismiss them because they
(22:47):
know not what they do. So, and what's fantastic about
this is if you allow yourself to feel all the things,
feel all of the emotions, so that you have access
to your discernment, you won't have to do a gut
(23:08):
head gut check anymore. They lie to us. By the way,
your brain is not in your head. Your brain is
in your guts. So I want to tell you that
right now. And I want to come back. I want
to take a little break, but before we do, I
want to come back, and I'm going to talk about
congruence and walk you through that, So stay tuned. We'll
(23:29):
be back in a few minutes from a few words
from our sponsors to stay tuned. Thanks guys.
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Speaker 2 (26:40):
And we're back. Welcome to Beyond Mindset Limits, where we
go beyond surface level thinking and into real transformation, that
kind that changes your life, your business, and who you become.
I am your host, Tisham Marie Kane, and thank you
for the coming to the show today. So before our
(27:02):
break here we were talking about ethics, and I want
to go into discernment when we get in these coaching rooms. Now,
at the end of this I'm going to give you
a pathway to work one on one with me. You
can go to www. Dot t i s ha Marie
Kincai in dot com to do one on one coaching.
(27:24):
But I want to get through the material today because
it's really important, because I'm really passionate about being ethical
and congruent and aligned, and especially when we're holding rooms
and holding space for others. So let's talk about congruents.
Because when you're choosing a coach or a mentor a facilitator,
(27:48):
even like a spiritual leader or a hypnotherapist, a trainer,
anyone who's going to lead you into a deep transformation,
you must pay attention to congruents. Congruence just doesn't mean perfection.
Let me say that again. Congruence does not mean perfection.
None of us are perfect. I'm not perfect. No coach
(28:11):
is perfect, no leader, no room is perfect. But congruence
means alignment. It means there is consistency between what someone
teaches and how they live their life, how they treat people,
and how they handle power, how they handle money, how
they handle vulnerability, and how they respond when someone does
(28:34):
not agree with their frame. A congruent leader does not
need to dominate your interpretation of yourself. A congruent leader
does not need to make you wrong in order for
them to be right. A congruent leader does not need
to use shame as a tool. A congruent leader does
(28:56):
not make you disagree proof you know disagree with them
as proof of your dysfunction. A congruent leader does not
bypass your critical factor and then call your confusion a breakthrough.
A congruent leader can hold intensity without becoming evasive, and
(29:19):
they can challenge you without reducing you, and they can
see your patterns without stripping you of dignity. They can
create a powerful room without making themselves the god of
the room. And that's leadership. I've been in leadership since
I was nineteen years old, and probably even before that,
because I remember in high school I was president of FFA,
(29:42):
right Future Farmers of America, where they taught us how
to do extemporantious speaking and how to lead, you know rooms,
so you're not the god of the room. And I
have been in coaching spaces where the man or the
woman has thought that they are God, and I was like, huh,
(30:02):
So I just stood back and watched and allowed everything
to unfold and thought, Okay, I'm done right, because I
know what clear leadership looks like. And as we build
ethical coaching companies, ethical transformation spaces, and ethical hypnotherapy practices,
(30:22):
ethical spiritual communities, ethical personal development brands, this has to
matter because when people come to us, they are trusting
us with their stories. They're trusting us with their pain,
with their dreams, with their subconscious They're trusting us with
parts of themselves that have not always been felt safe,
(30:47):
especially in big rooms, and we have to honor that right.
As a clinical hypnotherapist, I bypassed that critical factor faction
of the brain in order to help my client rive
at their truth. And hypnotherapy is life changing. Gone is
the old I mean, come on, let's be real. AI
(31:08):
is going to be replacing everything here in the next
couple of years anyway, So God, gone is the old therapist.
Talk therapy, you know, come in, let's talk about you
know why you're sad? No, no, no, hypnotherapy. We go right
into the subconscious mind, bring out your truth, bring it
forward in one session one and done. I don't have years.
I don't have time. I don't have years to work
(31:30):
through the pain. We all have pain. I need a
quick cheat code to go in, rewire the subconscious mind,
give that little girl what she needed back then, and
let's keep on keeping on so that we can help
humanity rise to new levels. This has to matter because
when people come to us, they're trusting us, right, and
(31:54):
we have to honor that. We have to be more
interested in their truth than in our performance in the room,
more interested in their freedom than our authority, more interested
in their self truth than their dependency on us. Right.
(32:14):
This is what I say all the time. If I
am doing my job right, I'm actually working myself out
of a job. If you're coming to me, yes, I
have clients. I have clients who have had eighteen month sessions. Yes,
and those clients have transformed every aspect of their life
(32:36):
because they wanted to go in and do a micro
look at each little facet of their life, and we
transformed it. Yes, we did. But if I'm doing my
job right, I am working myself out of a job.
I don't need you coming back to me like fifteen times. No,
we don't need to do this. Let's get in here,
let's do the change work, and let's keep going. Right,
(32:57):
So let's talk about high ticket rooms for a month.
There is nothing wrong with high ticket rooms. There's nothing
wrong with high ticket coaching, right, and I believe in
the high ticket comes. There's a bulls eye. So if
you can envision if you're traveling down the highway here
in Palm Springs, I know you're out there in LA
and you're here in this across the globe, it's like
(33:20):
a bullseye, right, So the bulls eyes in the middle
that is the authority, that is the coach, that's the hypnotherapist,
and then out from there is you get their coaching team,
and then out from there you get their corporation and
out from there, So the closest you get to the
bulls eye, you know, it gets to be higher ticketing. Right.
(33:40):
I wouldn't say expensive because someone told me last week, Tisha,
you know your prices are kind of expensive, and I said,
compared to what, right, I can manage all of the objections,
My prices are expensive compared to what if I can
transform your whole, entire freaking life in one session. Why
wouldn't that be worth to you?
Speaker 3 (34:01):
Right?
Speaker 2 (34:02):
So, high ticket rooms, there's nothing wrong with that. There's
nothing wrong with premium transformation. There's nothing wrong with investing
in yourself, and I believe investing in proximity, mentorship rooms,
identity capacity expansion, and there's nothing There's something that we
(34:24):
need to be honest about. When a person is emotionally open,
publicly challenged, and then invited into a very expensive program,
the ethics of that process matter. The timing matters, the
language matters, the pressures matters, the nervous system state matters.
(34:47):
The person should be making a decision from clarity, not
from shame, from sovereignty, not from emotional collapse, from alignment,
not from fear or of missing out, from rounded desire,
not from the need to prove they are healed. You know,
when I walked into that coaching space, I'm completely open.
(35:07):
I'm available for it all. My name is Tisha Marie Kane,
and I am here to play a big game. So
if there's anything in my blind spots that I don't see,
I mean truthfully, and I even hate using the word
truthfully because I'm always honest. But to be completely transparent,
if I can't see something, I normally flip it over
(35:28):
to my husband and ask my husband for guidance because
he's right in my inner circle. Right, I'm like, hey,
I'm feeling a certain way. What do you think this means?
You know, what can you see that I'm not seeing?
Speaker 3 (35:39):
Right?
Speaker 2 (35:39):
So I flip it over to someone that's closest to
me because I love him and I trust him and
I married him. Right, So the reality is, if I
can't see what's in there, I ask for someone close
to me, and then I understand the power of the room.
That's why last week my whole segment on beyond mindset
Limits was the power of the room. And I did
that and it was transformational. This time. It was a
(36:02):
different transformation that I have ever experienced. What not to do,
and it's perfect, there's no blaming, there's nothing outside of me.
I had this experience for my own level growth and
it's great. But I'm talking to you today about discern it.
Ethical rooms help you come home to yourself. That does
(36:26):
not mean they're always comfortable. I walked in there open, right.
Real transformation is not always comfortable. Sometimes it's confronting and emotional,
and I saw that right. I thought I had dealt
with some things in the past. And maybe I had,
or maybe it was all smokescreen and mirrors. I don't know,
(36:46):
But all I know is on the on saugh set
of that container, I was mad. I was angry, and
I couldn't ignore it. And I came home and I
went through a whole notebook and journaled everything out and
then said, oh, okay, something fell off. I need to
sleep on it. That didn't resonate with me, right, And
(37:10):
then I started saying, my subconscious belongs to me. That
was that a projection or was that my own truth?
Because your subconscious is not available for someone else's projection.
If you've got a good leader, they're opening you, they're
asking questions, right. I think that's going to be my
(37:30):
next book is good quality Questions. Ask yourself the good
quality questions and then give you guys like one hundred questions.
If you ask yourself these questions and be completely vulnerable
and honest and write them down in your journal, you're
going to get there and you don't have to spend
another dime on coaches again. You see how I'm so
(37:51):
congruent right here on this radio show. I'm already working
myself out of a job again, putting the but in
your court, the ball in your court. I want you
to come to your own truth. But that's why coaches
need coaches sometimes, right, because you can't see the picture
when you're in the frame. But when someone changes the frame,
(38:13):
or someone narrows their frame down too much and doesn't
look at the whole picture. She has hot pink nails
and she's an attorney. What the heck? Right? Not even
once taking into consideration hot pink nails might be she's
an artist and she has a way to express herself. Right.
(38:33):
I want to come help you come to your own truth.
Your pain is not available for someone else's performance. Your
tears are not proof that they're right, your anger is
not proof that they're wrong. Your resistance is not always sabotaged.
And sometimes resistance is wisdom. Listen to that. I speak
(38:57):
about wisdom, right. I had the Executive Wisdom Series radio
show for a minute, and then I have the Wisdom
of the Trees. I talk about wisdom all the time,
and I think education and experience. So education plus experience
equals the wisdom. And I have lived a thousand lifetimes
(39:18):
as this Avatar, Tisha Marie Kane and it all. It
hasn't always been rosy and beautiful like it is now.
I had to go through some garbage, and I had
to go through a coaching room where I wasn't aligned
with too so what was real for me could really
come online. And I'm passionate about this. Sometimes resistance is
(39:39):
the part of you that still shows the truth when
the room is trying to convince you otherwise. And this
is why discernment is so important. Discernment is not judgment,
and it's not cynicism. It's not being closed. It's the
ability to stay open without a bay yourself. And here's
(40:02):
what discernment says, right, So I had to noodle out
on this for the whole freaking day to try to
come and understand, or rather comprehend why I was feeling
so much anger. This is what discernment says. I can
receive what is mine and reject what is not. I
can honor the activation and reject the projection. I can
(40:24):
learn from the room and still leave the frame. I
can be grateful for the experience without agreeing with the interpretation.
I can be open to my truth without surrendering surrendering
authorship right, because nobody gets the pin to my life.
And this is what my radio show is all about.
This is beyond mindset limits because this is not surface
(40:48):
level mindset work. This is not just positive thinking. This
is identity level sovereignty. And I apologize for yelling at
you right now, I love because I'm just ah. I
hope you could feel my energy. Right This is subconscious integrity.
(41:10):
This is leadership at the level of your nervous system.
And I believe this is where the coaching industry has
to go. Right. We need rooms where people are safe
to be powerful. If you go to a seminar, if
you go to a coaching class, if you go to
(41:31):
a retreat, do me a favor and Google or use
AI to run the schematics on the person that is
holding space. Just do that real quick. Please do that
for me, please, because it's going to save you a
world of time money. Right. So, we need rooms where
(41:53):
people are safe. We need rooms where people are safe
to be challenged, and then there's safe to be able
to cry and say no and disagree and have their
own truth and be their own hero. Rooms where work
is not about worshiping the leader, but awakening the person.
So many rooms, it's like this worship of the leader.
(42:14):
I'm like, what, No, it's not about the leader. And
if the leader is congruent, if the leader is an integrity,
if the leader has the highest amount of ethics, the
leader is turning the pin over back to you. Rooms
where the highest outcome is not dependency, but it's sovereignty.
(42:38):
Rooms where people leave more connected to themselves, not less.
And this is our future of you guys, This is
our future. And guess what, you know why I'm so excited.
I am on the ground floor leading rooms, helping people
come into their own sovereignty, come into their own truth.
(42:59):
This is the ground floor where we get to build
back the new Earth. We get to show people what
it is to not just take their money and leave
them emptily right. So, I've seen rooms where people are
emotionally cracked open and then sold to while they're still
(43:20):
trying to find their center. It's disgusting. I've seen people
told that their hesitation was fear. It's disgusting that their
discernment is resistance and their boundaries are blocked. I've seen
where leaders have said, oh you're blocked, Oh you have
no access to that, I'm like, what right, And I'm
(43:40):
saying no, no more. Not in the rooms I build,
not in the work that I lead, not in the
world where I am here to help create. Because when
I build my own rooms, I want it to be different.
I want the room to be powerful. Yes. I want
the room to be transformation. Yes. I want the people
(44:02):
to have breakthroughs. Yes. I want the people to collapse
timelines yes. And I want to go beyond mindset limits
with all of them. Yes. And I also want it
to be clean, and I want it to be ethical,
and I want it to be congruent. And I want
them to keep their own authority and have their own
(44:23):
inner authority. I want it to be that way, and
I will build that. I want people to know they
can be seen without being reduced. I want people to
know their subconscious will be honored, not evaded. Right, There's
a power, There's there's so much power in being seen.
(44:44):
That's why in coaching spaces, you're invited up to the
front of the room, and those who are invited up
to the front of the room normally have the biggest
transformation because they have one hundred people watching them. Right,
But it really puts the leader's ethics and integri online.
But if the leader is moving too quickly or out
(45:06):
of congruence, or you know, ghost writing the subconscious for
the person and having everyone buy in by saying yes, yes, yes,
the power of words. I mean, come on, right. I
want to know that my clients can be seen and
not be reduced. I want them to come into their
(45:27):
own stories. I want people to know that transformation is
not about someone else's ghost writing their wound. It's about
them reclaiming the pin. And maybe this is the deepest
lesson of all. Maybe this is why I'm so passionate
about this topic today, about discernment. It's because I'm an
author and I take full responsibility over my life. No
(45:53):
one gets to rewrite or ghost write my subconscious. No
one gets to take my external data points and make
meaning of them. No one gets to tell you who
you are without inviting your truth into the room. No
one gets to make their interpretation more sacred than you're
inner knowing. And if they do, you are supposed to
(46:19):
be able to feel it and come to it on
your own. You are allowed to name it, you are
allowed to leave, and you're allowed to take the gold
and leave the rest. But today I want to leave
you with questions before you enter the room. I want
you to ask, does this leader make me feel connected
(46:41):
to myself? Right? Normally? I'm so in So if you
don't know anything about the Claires, so you have clairvoyance,
Claire sentient, Claire cognizant. If you don't know anything about
the Claires, I would invite you to go and look
out the Claires. Everyone has Claire abilities, these psychic abilities,
(47:02):
this intuition for those who are not woo woo. But
I teached beyond mindset limits. So I love all the
woo woo stuff and all the stuff, and I'm very
grounded as well, but I know there are layers within
layers within layers of this game called life. And I
also did a radio segment on the game of Life
(47:23):
and how to win. Right. I have give you guys
all the cheat codes because I love you. That's who
I am. So when I tapped into my nervous system
and I was able to bring my clayers fully online
and my clear cognizance online to be able to feel
it out, now, I don't someone even told me once,
oh your gut, your gut's wrong, and I'm like, uh no,
(47:48):
my gut is always right, right, And so I was like,
oh no, So I couldn't trust that person anymore. I'm like, Okay,
you're out of alignment, you're out of congruence. Anyone who
tells me do not trust my gut is cuckoo for
cocoo puffs. Right. So, once you come online and you
bring discernment into your body and you can feel close
(48:11):
your eyes and shut your mouth and take them in
it and feel if someone's asking you for one hundred
thousand dollars and why are the money tomorrow? Does that
feel congruent to you? No? Or yes? It can be right.
I'm not saying it's not possible. I'm saying it's important
(48:33):
to know your truth. It's important to discern what is
your truth. And when I got angry, that anger taught
me something and it was really interesting. I'm like, holy moly,
this is anger. I haven't witnessed anger in a long time.
(48:56):
And I was like, Okay, I get to explore this.
I get to be very vulnerable with myself in my
journal right now and have everything come up about this anger.
And boy, that is the reason why this show today
is called discernment right, because I want to again pass
the baton back to you as a good coach, which
(49:18):
I am. I have influence and credibility and authority in
my space. I wrote beyond Mindset Limits. It's the standard
for CEOs and executives who refuse to be overlooked, undervalued,
or forgotten. This book that I wrote a couple of
weeks ago went number one international best selling author in
(49:39):
forty two hours. Like come on, I am the coach.
And that's why I speak so passionate about this is
making sure that ethics are on the line, making sure
that when you step into these spaces, you know what
you're getting yourself into. Or you know what's great is
(50:00):
don't go alone. Always bring a buddy system so your
best friend you can check check it was that? Was
that something that really happened? Is that? Is that true?
Did you get out of that? When I got out
of that? Right? Because if you go alone, you're like, Okay,
you're only relying on your nervous system, and if you
haven't reset your nervous system, then whoop, it's a lot. Right,
So take someone with you and say, okay, this was
this was in alignment or it was it? Right? Do
(50:23):
they honor your nervous system when you're in the room.
Do they embody what they teach? Right? Do they embody
what they teach? And stop and look around and see
what you see? See what you see? Right? I was
in a high level coaching container where they were making
(50:43):
you know, I don't know, million dollar months. I don't
even know, but they were making million dollar months, and
yet they came in the room looking like crap. I'm
like huh. And I kept that was weird. I kept
like saying, huh, you're making million dollar months, You're living
in a forty seven million dollar home on California coast,
(51:06):
and you come in looking like a homeless guy. Like
I'm like huh. And I just sit there and I'm like,
this is weird. This is incongruent. It's they're not congruent,
and I just I couldn't get past it. I'm like, huh, Okay,
everyone had just invested, you know, anywhere from from five
thousand to ten thousand dollars to be in this room
(51:27):
and the leader comes in and he's not congruent, and
I just said huh wow, okay. But I wrote it down.
I'm like hum, I need to investigate this. Investigate this.
I got curious. Huh what does this mean? Do they
embody what they teach? Do they use emotional vulnerability responsibly? Right?
(51:49):
Do do I feel expanded or do I feel diminished? Right?
So this is my stand. I'm not against coaching. I'm
not against transformation. This is what I teach. I'm not
against high ticket rooms. I'm not against deep transformational work
because this is the work that I do in my
everyday life. I'm not against any of that. I believe
this work with my whole heart. I believe we must
(52:13):
raise the standard. I believe we must build ethical coaching companies.
I believe we must lead congruent rooms, honor the subconscious,
and understand what your truth is. And that's the difference.
Commanding a room is powerful, Holding a room is responsibility,
and the future belongs to leaders who can do both
(52:35):
with integrity. So, if you're listening today and you have
ever left a room feeling confused, reduced, activated, or unsure,
if this has ever happened to you and your truth
was projected on, I want you to follow me. Go
say me too, sign up, get my newsletter today. You
can reach me on all platforms. Tissa Marie Kane, thank
(52:57):
you for another episode of Beyond Mindset Limits. I am
so grateful and I hope to hear you guys next week.
Speaker 1 (53:03):
Thank you, Thank you for joining Tisha Marie Kine for
Beyond Mindset Limits. Tune in every Wednesday at four pm
as the conversation continues around mindset, legal insight, and publishing
as a strategic tool for business positioning. Visit Tishamrie Caine
(53:26):
dot com, Orkins Legal Support dot com for more information
or to schedule your private appointment.
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Betrayal Weekly
Betrayal Weekly is back for a new season. Every Thursday, Betrayal Weekly shares first-hand accounts of broken trust, shocking deceptions, and the trail of destruction they leave behind. Hosted by Andrea Gunning, this weekly ongoing series digs into real-life stories of betrayal and the aftermath. From stories of double lives to dark discoveries, these are cautionary tales and accounts of resilience against all odds. From the producers of the critically acclaimed Betrayal series, Betrayal Weekly drops new episodes every Thursday. If you would like to share your story, you can reach out to the Betrayal Team by emailing them at betrayalpod@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram at @betrayalpod and @glasspodcasts. Please join our Substack for additional exclusive content, curated book recommendations, and community discussions. Sign up FREE by clicking this link Beyond Betrayal Substack. Join our community dedicated to truth, resilience, and healing. Your voice matters! Be a part of our Betrayal journey on Substack.