August 15, 2025 • 22 mins
A compilation of humorous shows ranging from slapstick sketches to witty banter and family sitcoms. This series highlights the timeless appeal of laughter and character-driven comedy.
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Don't touch that dial because there's nothing else on. You
might just as well listen to Blondie Blondie rebroadcasts for
the Servicemen and Women of the United Nations, with Penny
Singleton and Arthur Lake as Blondie and Dagwood Bumpstead, respectively.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
And now for our weekly visit with our neighbors, the
Bumpsteads of Shady Lane Avenue, who have as their guest. Tonight,
Fanny Brice has Baby Snooks. Yes, tonight Baby Snooks is
(00:54):
going to visit the Bumpstead But first let's look in
at one two seven Shady Lane Avenue and see what's
going on. Something seems to be wrong with Alexander, the
pride and joy of the Bumpstead family. It seems he
isn't enjoying school this year as much as he did before.
Blondie and dag Wood are talking to Alexander, who just
arrived home after a hard day with his teacher.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Well, Alexander, how did school go today? Huh? I said,
how did school go today? I didn't notice? Hey, what's
the matter with you? Was it what happened today? I
don't know. I haven't seen the evening paper yet. We
mean what happened at school? Oh? At school? Oh, Alexander,
(01:35):
please pay attention and focus your eyes. Excuse me, mom,
He like you're only half here, which even less than that, Alexander,
we'd like to know what happened at school. We're your parents,
and we hope we're not asking too much, but we
would like to know what to happen at school if
if anything, Oh, it was the same old stuff. M well,
(01:58):
go ahead, go ahead? Was why if he you ask
me some questions and I answered the questions, well at
you answered them all that's my thumb. I answered them
all wrong. That's your son, Alexander. It does what seems
to be wrong with school this year? Huh? Cosin it
(02:18):
just doesn't seem to be anything right about it. And
that's a hard situation to correct. While I'm going upstairs
and woke around, call me when dinner's ready. How do
you like that? I don't. I can't understand what's wrong
with it? Well, Blondie, maybe it's one of those things,
you know, Blondie. Ever so often he decides on his
life's work. He's going to be an actor, a chemist,
(02:40):
or steeple jack. In there, we have trouble with him
when Jilly forgets it. What do you think he's decided
to be this time a loafer? Well, he can't get
away with that Nith family, even if he did get
the idea from you. Yeah, even if he did get
If you're blondie, Will, Alexander usually sees you lying on
that couch. He already knows what you look like standing
(03:01):
out at all, Blondie. He's beginning to think his father
is something horizontal that snored. Now, now, Broondie, that's not fair.
You can't blame me for the way Alexander has been acting, Will,
what do you think it's wrong? Then? He certainly lost
interest in things. Yeah, he seems to have lost interest
in everything. Get away, I'm at I'll test amount, Alexander. Yeah,
(03:25):
do you want a quarter? I said, do you want
a quarter? I as you the first time. Pop, I'm
just thinking is over he's lost interest? All right, Well
do you want it? Yeah? Okay, oh, thank you too much.
Then I come downstairs again. You can drop it in
(03:46):
my pocket. Oh maybe maybe he'd likes me to spend
it for him too. As you know, I've been thinking
maybe we're not taking enough interest in his mental development. Well,
I have. I've always been interested in training his mind
the same way mine was trained, but you always chased
me away from him. Well, dear one, Dagwood Bumpstead is enough, Yeah,
(04:07):
you know, Dagwood, I think i'd better have a little
talk with him and see if I can't get him
interested in something. Oh that's well, but what are you
going to get him interested in? I know, I know
exactly what I'll talk to him about. I'll explain to
him what's going on in the world. You know, Alexander
doesn't realize that history is being made all around him. Now, Alexander,
(04:40):
I wanna have a little chatter you, okame on? What
about Well, you seem to have lost interest in things.
I don't believe you know what a very important period
the world is going through right now. Oh yes, but
of course I didn't attend the Big Power O A
dumbard noakes where Oh yeah, yes, uh? Well, then you
(05:03):
just asked any questions at all, and I'll uh answer
them for you. What are your opinions on postwar planning
and the Peach? Uh? Uh? Post war planning and the piece.
Yeah that's right, postwar planning and the Peach. Oh well,
love Uh let's see. Uh yes, oh, of course that
(05:26):
question isn't very specific, Alexander. Ask me something that isn't
so general. Well, what do you think of Lord van
Sitter's proposals? Who? Lord Bencer, Lord van Sitters? Oh? Oh, yes,
of course, Well I guess that's that, Alexander. Where did
(05:48):
you hear about this? Lord? Uh? Watchman dooodle? Oh? I
listened to the radio and read the newspapers. You see,
Lord van Sitter is a believer in a hard boiled piece.
He says Germany should be occupied for maybe as long
as fifty years. Is that great? Of course you know
about the Wells plan, don't you. Well?
Speaker 4 (06:08):
Uh, why mom, Now, don't cut your tongue of knee.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
At least I know the plan was recently worked out
by Orton Wells. No, Mom, it was worked out by
some their Wells. Oh, dear, well, I don't care. You
never can tell what Orton Wells is up to either,
you see, mom, some of the Wells thinks we ought
to divide Germany up from their three separate nations, set
(06:42):
up a world consul, and put put depending areas under
the protection of an international trusteeship. Simply amazing. Do you
know about the police problem too. Well, I can tell
you what the problem is, but I don't know how
they're gonna unravel it. Well, now, maybe between the two
of us we can fix that up too. I'd like
to hear Alexander just make yourself comfortable. Well, it sort
(07:06):
of started with the first partition of Poland in seventeen twelve.
Imagine there. Well, I didn't know they had partitions in
those days. I thought everybody lived in tent Hello, Daglar,
Oh my gosh, blonded you certainly weren't Alexander's room long enough. Look,
(07:30):
did you get him interested in something? Did you explain
joing what was going on in the world, Dagmar, You
just wouldn't believe what's happening in the world. Yeah, what's happening? Well,
I just had a long lecture on international affairs. You know,
our son listens like man to the radio commentators. In fact,
he could be one himself, sort of a Raymond Graham Swinglet. Well,
(07:53):
didn't you teach him anything? No, but I learned the
luck myself. Oh but well, they just snapped him out
of it here. There's something else wrong with him, Dagar.
And I don't know what to do. Alexander seems to
be bored with life. He does in me a little
young for that. I thought they didn't get bored with
life until they were sixteen. They do, so I guess
(08:15):
he'sn't bored with life. Must be something else. Yeah, well,
I know what I'm going to do, Blondie. I'm we're
all get him interested in sport. Tomorrow morning, before I
leave for the office, I'll take Alexander outside and running
through a little football practice. Yeah. Maybe that'll break this up.
We'll see, but maybe it'll break you up too. Well.
(08:46):
I guess their little football game has gone all right
so far this morning. Oh I spoke too soon. Well,
now let's see. I guess there are plenty of ice
cubes for his head if it is his head, and
plenty of cushions if it isn't. Oh Mom, what happened Alexander?
(09:09):
I'm trying to go through my side of the line,
and I gone him. Oh, Alexander really needle me into it.
I usually pretend I can't hold on to him, but
he insisted. Am I giving him a full treatment? And
you did? And how she are not in the mood
for all his excitement. Well, I've gotta be on my
way to school. I suppose so long. Oh wait a minute,
(09:32):
where's your father now? Ken Nole is bringing them ride him?
I'll yes, you just lean on me. Yeah, I'll call
the army camper. I'll have that man court martial. They
can't do that to deck with Bumpstead. Who can't do
what I've just been sideswiped by a tank destroyer. Now, Ada,
(09:53):
you all look like a tank. Oh. I wouldn't have
married you if you were well. I can't understand how
it happened. I was whizzing past Alexander with the ball
and this tank destroyer butt it in.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Noah, you didn't actually see it, did you, tag Wood?
Speaker 3 (10:07):
No, but you saw where cloud that burrow in the ground,
didn't you your nose did that? Oh? Oh, dear jes,
look at the mud on your shirt. I'll get you
a clean one.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Deer the bump steads as if you didn't know. We'll
be back again in just a few moments.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Are you fearly better now, Dagwood?
Speaker 3 (10:26):
I suppose so, But I still haven't found out what's
eating Alexander. Oh, Dagwood, look at the time you're going
to be late for the office. It huh oh, I
did get the door for me. It already is open.
It is well closing open it again. Didn't do you
want to ruin my timing? All right, jag win the
door open now, dag wars. Okay, I didn't get out
(10:47):
of the way, mister Nile. He sails out the door
like a buzz bomb. Okay, but would you'll be late
to the auditory? Okay? Where's my hat? Where's my hat?
I sail on the half rat. Yeah? Oh yeah, here, dear,
Oh that's not the hack rat at ten Niles. Oh
yeas well?
Speaker 5 (11:11):
Both head who come into my office? I didn't come down,
mister why not.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
I've got a white voice now, but ha ha.
Speaker 5 (11:28):
All right, come in as soon as you through bost hairs.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
I was just making up little jokes, mister Dins. What's
the matter with you? What were you doing? Well? I
was thinking a couple of time. I'll better hurt too. Oh,
mister Dinis, I've got something on my mind.
Speaker 5 (11:49):
I know it's all over your shoulders too.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
However, what is it? Well, well, it's it's well, it's
about Alexander. Every sense. School's sorry. He's been moping around
and paying very little attention to practically nothing most of
the time. Usually you ought.
Speaker 5 (12:09):
To be hit over the head with that sentence. What's
wrong with him?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
That just it? Mister Didds. We don't know. Wa.
Speaker 5 (12:16):
Didn't you ever feel like that when you were Alexander's Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:18):
I did once. Mm gosh, I felt terrible. It was
like the end of the world or whatever. The price
of lollipops went up? How typically?
Speaker 5 (12:29):
Yeah, I don't suppose you know whether the price of
lollipops has gone up or down late.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
Oh, the prices stayed the same, but I find they
don't last as long. Oh, I don't know anyhow.
Speaker 5 (12:41):
Alexander's a little more mature than you were at his age.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
Huh you are now, for that matter? Yeah? Uh j C.
How about it when you went to school that did
anything ever make you feel awful? Huh oh, he says, yes,
of course, Oh it did. M Hey, maybe that'll be
a clue.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
What was it?
Speaker 5 (12:58):
Well, it was a cute little brunette school, and I
should have known.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
M I'll bet you were a regular wolf junior grade.
He got, go on that, what what what about the
little brunette? Hih h she was asi and I was nine.
Speaker 5 (13:16):
H h what a delicious dish of dimple divility.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
Oh no, you couldn't have been that cute, mister Dinning.
A girl, Oh yeah, her name was Gwendolen. O'Toole.
Speaker 5 (13:30):
She couldn't play jacks or pu cheesy, but boy how
she could play post office.
Speaker 3 (13:37):
Ah, nothing but special delivery air mail letters.
Speaker 5 (13:39):
Huh mm m registered too mm yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:44):
But of course when you went to school, mister Dinners,
it was just a pony express. Well.
Speaker 5 (13:53):
Gwendolen and I were finally separated. Oh brother, it was
a sad day.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Did her family move out of town? Oh?
Speaker 5 (14:00):
So she went on to five B and I went
back to the fourth grade. I had to sweat out
an old geography rap. Yeah, I certainly lost interest in life.
Speaker 3 (14:14):
Hey hey, wait a minute, I'll bet that's it. There's
a woman behind this, mister Dinners. And as the French,
they should see love fami.
Speaker 5 (14:23):
Oh yeah, Chase the Dame.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Well, dad Wood, maybe you've got something. Yeah, well come on,
I can't what we'll do. We'll sort of quiz and
find out, because if it's a girl that's bothering him,
we could which man. Oh yeah, hello Alexander, Hello parents,
h Everything, it's cool. Oh come she comes shot just
(14:58):
so so, Alexander. Are there any specially nice girls this year? Gosh? No,
school has been awful since TuS Murphy left.
Speaker 5 (15:08):
Uh.
Speaker 4 (15:09):
Oh, gosh, what a woman.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
M He certainly could play third base. H what's wrong
with the little Roger's girl?
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (15:24):
She always gets weak from undernourishment right in front of
the sweet shop. She gets treated so much we call
her the girl with the Golden stomach. D Uh well,
uh what did this twuts Murphy do? He's the matches
to see who pays it? Oh? Yeah, gosh, I certainly
miss that gal. Well that's why. Mm. Well, I guess
(15:46):
our go out and back and burns and leaves. Oh,
thank you, Alexander, I guess that's it all right? Oh dad,
would I know just the thing to cure you? Or
what is it? Well? Of the very sweet little girl
moved into our neighborhood a few weeks ago. I think
I'll invite her over to meet Alexander. A sweet little girl?
(16:06):
Who is it? I think her family name is Higgins,
but everyone calls her snooks. You mean baby Snoop's on
the radio, Yes, DearS, oh boy, brownie. Anything can happen
now that's probably baby snooke. Yes, oh yeah, I see
(16:29):
her at the door. She certainly this sweet looking little girl,
isn't she dag? Would you let her in? Oh? Dear,
I hope she gets along with Alexander. Oh it was
a bonsteads live here? Oh? Yes, sure you don't. Won't
(16:54):
want you to come right in? Snookes, I don't miss
your boneskad me. Hey, blondie, did you hear that? What
does she mean? Yeah? What do you mean? Snoops? My
daddy said that missus bonds says a way to pansion
this family. Oh he must have seen me wearing flacks. Yes,
(17:17):
that must be it. Well, come in side, snoops. Why
because there's a very nice little boy. We want you
to meet my soul boy. Well what do you like? Hmm? Well, snooks,
(17:39):
we have electric fans somewhere. Well, I will say I
was only trying to be helpful. Well, if you want
to be helpful, stay here and entertained, snoop. I'll be
back as soon as I can find Alexander. Okay, Well, snoops,
won't you come inside and close the door? Why? Because
it's cold outside. If I close the doll, will it
(18:01):
make it any warmer outside. Well, I I don't know.
I never thought of that. There here we are. Now?
Is there anything you want? Yeah? What? I wanna go home,
but you just got here. Would you like a nice
piece of cake? Chocolate last cake yes? Hm, chocolate silly yes,
(18:28):
and chalk top yes. I don't like chocolate. M Let's see, man.
Maybe you'd like to play a game. Huh? Now, will
(18:51):
you play a game with me? If I give you
a penny? Uh? Huh oh alright, I here's a penny,
thank you? Yeah, h well that's nice. I'd like to
hear little girls say thank you. You mean on a honey,
and you'll hear it again. Well, no, let's start the game. Now,
let's start the game. You go first, all right, out
(19:14):
of the knave and pinch me one rest out of
beneath the lull Oh what last? Pinch me? Okay, so.
Speaker 5 (19:26):
Hey that hurts.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
Yeah, what kind of game is that? A game is
something you're supposed to enjoy it again? Well, it's my
turn now, snoes, Adam and even pinch me. We're on
a raft, Adam and even who pinch me? Okay, you
(19:48):
did it again? You the playing on the game. Yeah,
well sure if it's different. What's this one called? Hi?
Out of the knee and shop me? Why away? Oh no, no,
you don't get away from what's going on in here?
(20:10):
Oh hell that woman, sir, I never touched her? U Snooks?
May I present my son Alexander? Bumpsa et funny little
all brothers? Now, I want you two children to like
(20:33):
each other. I like her? Well, what do you say, Snooks?
Do you wanna fight? N Snooks? Don't you know that
little girls shouldn't say? Uh huh? And aren't you ashamed
of yourself? Uh huh? Then what do you say to Alexander?
(20:54):
Wanna while? Oh Snooks dieine? Still disappointment? I thought you
all leave her alone? Man, I like a girl would sprunk? Snap?
Come on, snookes, let's go out and play all right?
Funny three? I love that girl. Don't you think Snooks
(21:18):
is wonderful? Mom? I certainly do, Alexander? What do you think? Pop?
I checked? Well, so long, blobs snuffs and I are
going out. What would you like to play? Snoots? I
got a swell new game. What's he called ounam and
knave and paint me? Wanna red? Well?
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Dad?
Speaker 3 (21:49):
Would I don't think Alexander's going to be bored with
life anymore. No, they're not blonde either. You sure cured him,
all right?
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, this is the Armed Forces Radio Service.
Don't touch that dial because there's nothing else on. You
might just as well listen to Blondie Blondie rebroadcasts for
the Servicemen and Women of the United Nations, with Penny
Singleton and Arthur Lake as Blondie and Dagwood Bumpstead, respectively.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
And now for our weekly visit with our neighbors, the
Bumpsteads of Shady Lane Avenue, who have as their guest. Tonight,
Fanny Brice has Baby Snooks. Yes, tonight Baby Snooks is
(00:54):
going to visit the Bumpstead But first let's look in
at one two seven Shady Lane Avenue and see what's
going on. Something seems to be wrong with Alexander, the
pride and joy of the Bumpstead family. It seems he
isn't enjoying school this year as much as he did before.
Blondie and dag Wood are talking to Alexander, who just
arrived home after a hard day with his teacher.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Well, Alexander, how did school go today? Huh? I said,
how did school go today? I didn't notice? Hey, what's
the matter with you? Was it what happened today? I
don't know. I haven't seen the evening paper yet. We
mean what happened at school? Oh? At school? Oh, Alexander,
(01:35):
please pay attention and focus your eyes. Excuse me, mom,
He like you're only half here, which even less than that, Alexander,
we'd like to know what happened at school. We're your parents,
and we hope we're not asking too much, but we
would like to know what to happen at school if
if anything, Oh, it was the same old stuff. M well,
(01:58):
go ahead, go ahead? Was why if he you ask
me some questions and I answered the questions, well at
you answered them all that's my thumb. I answered them
all wrong. That's your son, Alexander. It does what seems
to be wrong with school this year? Huh? Cosin it
(02:18):
just doesn't seem to be anything right about it. And
that's a hard situation to correct. While I'm going upstairs
and woke around, call me when dinner's ready. How do
you like that? I don't. I can't understand what's wrong
with it? Well, Blondie, maybe it's one of those things,
you know, Blondie. Ever so often he decides on his
life's work. He's going to be an actor, a chemist,
(02:40):
or steeple jack. In there, we have trouble with him
when Jilly forgets it. What do you think he's decided
to be this time a loafer? Well, he can't get
away with that Nith family, even if he did get
the idea from you. Yeah, even if he did get
If you're blondie, Will, Alexander usually sees you lying on
that couch. He already knows what you look like standing
(03:01):
out at all, Blondie. He's beginning to think his father
is something horizontal that snored. Now, now, Broondie, that's not fair.
You can't blame me for the way Alexander has been acting, Will,
what do you think it's wrong? Then? He certainly lost
interest in things. Yeah, he seems to have lost interest
in everything. Get away, I'm at I'll test amount, Alexander. Yeah,
(03:25):
do you want a quarter? I said, do you want
a quarter? I as you the first time. Pop, I'm
just thinking is over he's lost interest? All right, Well
do you want it? Yeah? Okay, oh, thank you too much.
Then I come downstairs again. You can drop it in
(03:46):
my pocket. Oh maybe maybe he'd likes me to spend
it for him too. As you know, I've been thinking
maybe we're not taking enough interest in his mental development. Well,
I have. I've always been interested in training his mind
the same way mine was trained, but you always chased
me away from him. Well, dear one, Dagwood Bumpstead is enough, Yeah,
(04:07):
you know, Dagwood, I think i'd better have a little
talk with him and see if I can't get him
interested in something. Oh that's well, but what are you
going to get him interested in? I know, I know
exactly what I'll talk to him about. I'll explain to
him what's going on in the world. You know, Alexander
doesn't realize that history is being made all around him. Now, Alexander,
(04:40):
I wanna have a little chatter you, okame on? What
about Well, you seem to have lost interest in things.
I don't believe you know what a very important period
the world is going through right now. Oh yes, but
of course I didn't attend the Big Power O A
dumbard noakes where Oh yeah, yes, uh? Well, then you
(05:03):
just asked any questions at all, and I'll uh answer
them for you. What are your opinions on postwar planning
and the Peach? Uh? Uh? Post war planning and the piece.
Yeah that's right, postwar planning and the Peach. Oh well,
love Uh let's see. Uh yes, oh, of course that
(05:26):
question isn't very specific, Alexander. Ask me something that isn't
so general. Well, what do you think of Lord van
Sitter's proposals? Who? Lord Bencer, Lord van Sitters? Oh? Oh, yes,
of course, Well I guess that's that, Alexander. Where did
(05:48):
you hear about this? Lord? Uh? Watchman dooodle? Oh? I
listened to the radio and read the newspapers. You see,
Lord van Sitter is a believer in a hard boiled piece.
He says Germany should be occupied for maybe as long
as fifty years. Is that great? Of course you know
about the Wells plan, don't you. Well?
Speaker 4 (06:08):
Uh, why mom, Now, don't cut your tongue of knee.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
At least I know the plan was recently worked out
by Orton Wells. No, Mom, it was worked out by
some their Wells. Oh, dear, well, I don't care. You
never can tell what Orton Wells is up to either,
you see, mom, some of the Wells thinks we ought
to divide Germany up from their three separate nations, set
(06:42):
up a world consul, and put put depending areas under
the protection of an international trusteeship. Simply amazing. Do you
know about the police problem too. Well, I can tell
you what the problem is, but I don't know how
they're gonna unravel it. Well, now, maybe between the two
of us we can fix that up too. I'd like
to hear Alexander just make yourself comfortable. Well, it sort
(07:06):
of started with the first partition of Poland in seventeen twelve.
Imagine there. Well, I didn't know they had partitions in
those days. I thought everybody lived in tent Hello, Daglar,
Oh my gosh, blonded you certainly weren't Alexander's room long enough. Look,
(07:30):
did you get him interested in something? Did you explain
joing what was going on in the world, Dagmar, You
just wouldn't believe what's happening in the world. Yeah, what's happening? Well,
I just had a long lecture on international affairs. You know,
our son listens like man to the radio commentators. In fact,
he could be one himself, sort of a Raymond Graham Swinglet. Well,
(07:53):
didn't you teach him anything? No, but I learned the
luck myself. Oh but well, they just snapped him out
of it here. There's something else wrong with him, Dagar.
And I don't know what to do. Alexander seems to
be bored with life. He does in me a little
young for that. I thought they didn't get bored with
life until they were sixteen. They do, so I guess
(08:15):
he'sn't bored with life. Must be something else. Yeah, well,
I know what I'm going to do, Blondie. I'm we're
all get him interested in sport. Tomorrow morning, before I
leave for the office, I'll take Alexander outside and running
through a little football practice. Yeah. Maybe that'll break this up.
We'll see, but maybe it'll break you up too. Well.
(08:46):
I guess their little football game has gone all right
so far this morning. Oh I spoke too soon. Well,
now let's see. I guess there are plenty of ice
cubes for his head if it is his head, and
plenty of cushions if it isn't. Oh Mom, what happened Alexander?
(09:09):
I'm trying to go through my side of the line,
and I gone him. Oh, Alexander really needle me into it.
I usually pretend I can't hold on to him, but
he insisted. Am I giving him a full treatment? And
you did? And how she are not in the mood
for all his excitement. Well, I've gotta be on my
way to school. I suppose so long. Oh wait a minute,
(09:32):
where's your father now? Ken Nole is bringing them ride him?
I'll yes, you just lean on me. Yeah, I'll call
the army camper. I'll have that man court martial. They
can't do that to deck with Bumpstead. Who can't do
what I've just been sideswiped by a tank destroyer. Now, Ada,
(09:53):
you all look like a tank. Oh. I wouldn't have
married you if you were well. I can't understand how
it happened. I was whizzing past Alexander with the ball
and this tank destroyer butt it in.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Noah, you didn't actually see it, did you, tag Wood?
Speaker 3 (10:07):
No, but you saw where cloud that burrow in the ground,
didn't you your nose did that? Oh? Oh, dear jes,
look at the mud on your shirt. I'll get you
a clean one.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Deer the bump steads as if you didn't know. We'll
be back again in just a few moments.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Are you fearly better now, Dagwood?
Speaker 3 (10:26):
I suppose so, But I still haven't found out what's
eating Alexander. Oh, Dagwood, look at the time you're going
to be late for the office. It huh oh, I
did get the door for me. It already is open.
It is well closing open it again. Didn't do you
want to ruin my timing? All right, jag win the
door open now, dag wars. Okay, I didn't get out
(10:47):
of the way, mister Nile. He sails out the door
like a buzz bomb. Okay, but would you'll be late
to the auditory? Okay? Where's my hat? Where's my hat?
I sail on the half rat. Yeah? Oh yeah, here, dear,
Oh that's not the hack rat at ten Niles. Oh
yeas well?
Speaker 5 (11:11):
Both head who come into my office? I didn't come down,
mister why not.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
I've got a white voice now, but ha ha.
Speaker 5 (11:28):
All right, come in as soon as you through bost hairs.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
I was just making up little jokes, mister Dins. What's
the matter with you? What were you doing? Well? I
was thinking a couple of time. I'll better hurt too. Oh,
mister Dinis, I've got something on my mind.
Speaker 5 (11:49):
I know it's all over your shoulders too.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
However, what is it? Well, well, it's it's well, it's
about Alexander. Every sense. School's sorry. He's been moping around
and paying very little attention to practically nothing most of
the time. Usually you ought.
Speaker 5 (12:09):
To be hit over the head with that sentence. What's
wrong with him?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
That just it? Mister Didds. We don't know. Wa.
Speaker 5 (12:16):
Didn't you ever feel like that when you were Alexander's Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:18):
I did once. Mm gosh, I felt terrible. It was
like the end of the world or whatever. The price
of lollipops went up? How typically?
Speaker 5 (12:29):
Yeah, I don't suppose you know whether the price of
lollipops has gone up or down late.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
Oh, the prices stayed the same, but I find they
don't last as long. Oh, I don't know anyhow.
Speaker 5 (12:41):
Alexander's a little more mature than you were at his age.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
Huh you are now, for that matter? Yeah? Uh j C.
How about it when you went to school that did
anything ever make you feel awful? Huh oh, he says, yes,
of course, Oh it did. M Hey, maybe that'll be
a clue.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
What was it?
Speaker 5 (12:58):
Well, it was a cute little brunette school, and I
should have known.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
M I'll bet you were a regular wolf junior grade.
He got, go on that, what what what about the
little brunette? Hih h she was asi and I was nine.
Speaker 5 (13:16):
H h what a delicious dish of dimple divility.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
Oh no, you couldn't have been that cute, mister Dinning.
A girl, Oh yeah, her name was Gwendolen. O'Toole.
Speaker 5 (13:30):
She couldn't play jacks or pu cheesy, but boy how
she could play post office.
Speaker 3 (13:37):
Ah, nothing but special delivery air mail letters.
Speaker 5 (13:39):
Huh mm m registered too mm yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:44):
But of course when you went to school, mister Dinners,
it was just a pony express. Well.
Speaker 5 (13:53):
Gwendolen and I were finally separated. Oh brother, it was
a sad day.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Did her family move out of town? Oh?
Speaker 5 (14:00):
So she went on to five B and I went
back to the fourth grade. I had to sweat out
an old geography rap. Yeah, I certainly lost interest in life.
Speaker 3 (14:14):
Hey hey, wait a minute, I'll bet that's it. There's
a woman behind this, mister Dinners. And as the French,
they should see love fami.
Speaker 5 (14:23):
Oh yeah, Chase the Dame.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Well, dad Wood, maybe you've got something. Yeah, well come on,
I can't what we'll do. We'll sort of quiz and
find out, because if it's a girl that's bothering him,
we could which man. Oh yeah, hello Alexander, Hello parents,
h Everything, it's cool. Oh come she comes shot just
(14:58):
so so, Alexander. Are there any specially nice girls this year? Gosh? No,
school has been awful since TuS Murphy left.
Speaker 5 (15:08):
Uh.
Speaker 4 (15:09):
Oh, gosh, what a woman.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
M He certainly could play third base. H what's wrong
with the little Roger's girl?
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (15:24):
She always gets weak from undernourishment right in front of
the sweet shop. She gets treated so much we call
her the girl with the Golden stomach. D Uh well,
uh what did this twuts Murphy do? He's the matches
to see who pays it? Oh? Yeah, gosh, I certainly
miss that gal. Well that's why. Mm. Well, I guess
(15:46):
our go out and back and burns and leaves. Oh,
thank you, Alexander, I guess that's it all right? Oh dad,
would I know just the thing to cure you? Or
what is it? Well? Of the very sweet little girl
moved into our neighborhood a few weeks ago. I think
I'll invite her over to meet Alexander. A sweet little girl?
(16:06):
Who is it? I think her family name is Higgins,
but everyone calls her snooks. You mean baby Snoop's on
the radio, Yes, DearS, oh boy, brownie. Anything can happen
now that's probably baby snooke. Yes, oh yeah, I see
(16:29):
her at the door. She certainly this sweet looking little girl,
isn't she dag? Would you let her in? Oh? Dear,
I hope she gets along with Alexander. Oh it was
a bonsteads live here? Oh? Yes, sure you don't. Won't
(16:54):
want you to come right in? Snookes, I don't miss
your boneskad me. Hey, blondie, did you hear that? What
does she mean? Yeah? What do you mean? Snoops? My
daddy said that missus bonds says a way to pansion
this family. Oh he must have seen me wearing flacks. Yes,
(17:17):
that must be it. Well, come in side, snoops. Why
because there's a very nice little boy. We want you
to meet my soul boy. Well what do you like? Hmm? Well, snooks,
(17:39):
we have electric fans somewhere. Well, I will say I
was only trying to be helpful. Well, if you want
to be helpful, stay here and entertained, snoop. I'll be
back as soon as I can find Alexander. Okay, Well, snoops,
won't you come inside and close the door? Why? Because
it's cold outside. If I close the doll, will it
(18:01):
make it any warmer outside. Well, I I don't know.
I never thought of that. There here we are. Now?
Is there anything you want? Yeah? What? I wanna go home,
but you just got here. Would you like a nice
piece of cake? Chocolate last cake yes? Hm, chocolate silly yes,
(18:28):
and chalk top yes. I don't like chocolate. M Let's see, man.
Maybe you'd like to play a game. Huh? Now, will
(18:51):
you play a game with me? If I give you
a penny? Uh? Huh oh alright, I here's a penny,
thank you? Yeah, h well that's nice. I'd like to
hear little girls say thank you. You mean on a honey,
and you'll hear it again. Well, no, let's start the game. Now,
let's start the game. You go first, all right, out
(19:14):
of the knave and pinch me one rest out of
beneath the lull Oh what last? Pinch me? Okay, so.
Speaker 5 (19:26):
Hey that hurts.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
Yeah, what kind of game is that? A game is
something you're supposed to enjoy it again? Well, it's my
turn now, snoes, Adam and even pinch me. We're on
a raft, Adam and even who pinch me? Okay, you
(19:48):
did it again? You the playing on the game. Yeah,
well sure if it's different. What's this one called? Hi?
Out of the knee and shop me? Why away? Oh no, no,
you don't get away from what's going on in here?
(20:10):
Oh hell that woman, sir, I never touched her? U Snooks?
May I present my son Alexander? Bumpsa et funny little
all brothers? Now, I want you two children to like
(20:33):
each other. I like her? Well, what do you say, Snooks?
Do you wanna fight? N Snooks? Don't you know that
little girls shouldn't say? Uh huh? And aren't you ashamed
of yourself? Uh huh? Then what do you say to Alexander?
(20:54):
Wanna while? Oh Snooks dieine? Still disappointment? I thought you
all leave her alone? Man, I like a girl would sprunk? Snap?
Come on, snookes, let's go out and play all right?
Funny three? I love that girl. Don't you think Snooks
(21:18):
is wonderful? Mom? I certainly do, Alexander? What do you think? Pop?
I checked? Well, so long, blobs snuffs and I are
going out. What would you like to play? Snoots? I
got a swell new game. What's he called ounam and
knave and paint me? Wanna red? Well?
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Dad?
Speaker 3 (21:49):
Would I don't think Alexander's going to be bored with
life anymore. No, they're not blonde either. You sure cured him,
all right?
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Yeah, this is the Armed Forces Radio Service.
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