More Than Just a Hookup? Naughty and Surprising Reasons People Swipe

Dating apps have long been associated with finding romance or casual hookups, but recent research reveals a far broader range of motivations driving their use. According to a study highlighted by Global Dating Insights, users are turning to platforms like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge for purposes that extend well beyond love or fleeting connections. From seeking social validation to combating loneliness, exploring identity, or even making professional connections, dating apps have evolved into multifaceted social tools.

A comprehensive meta-synthesis published in the journal *Psychology of Personal Relationships* (DOI: 10.1177/02654075251366963) delves deeper into these diverse motives. The study synthesizes qualitative data from multiple sources to identify key reasons people engage with online dating platforms. While romantic and sexual pursuits remain significant, the research highlights other compelling drivers, such as building friendships, seeking emotional support, and experimenting with self-presentation in a low-stakes digital environment. For some, these apps serve as a way to boost self-esteem through matches and interactions, while others use them to navigate social anxieties or connect with like-minded communities.

These findings challenge the stereotype that dating apps are solely for romantic or physical connections, showcasing their role as dynamic social hubs. As dating apps continue to shape modern relationships, their versatility underscores a broader shift in how people seek connection, validation, and community in the digital age. Whether it’s a quest for love, a confidence boost, or a new friend, dating apps are proving to be far more than just a swipe for romance.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Podcasting since two thousand and five. This is the King
of Podcasts radio network, Kingofpodcasts dot com.

Speaker 2 (00:07):
The real modus operandi of today's online data. Is it
more than just a hookup? We're all a little depraved
and debaucherist. Here is the King of Podcasts. Welcome, Welcome,
King of Podcasts. Here with you another the praise than

(00:27):
the Bocher's episode starting off October Faul is here. None
of you go outside my house because it's still very
hot outside. It still feels like the late summer going
on outside here my studios in South Forodia, USA, where
I am based. Kingofpodcasts dot com is the website where
you can find all my content, all my past episodes.
So if you are so inclined, please go ahead and

(00:50):
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(01:12):
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I love doing these shows, but you know, I don't
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and I'm still kind of trying to figure out what

(01:34):
I need to go ahead and put everything in zero
and start back over again with nothing in the bank.
But let's just go with it. Anyway, this kick of
podcasts is not rich. Podcasting, much like radio is a
cruel mistress. You're not getting paid a whole lot on it.
So if you can help me out, I would greatly
appreciate it. Anyway, I'll leave it there. So a couple
things are going to bring up before we get started

(01:55):
on tonight's subject. A new study that says dating apps
are used for more than love or hookups. Well, if
you have to think about people dating today, don't take
your advice from Cardi B. This is from Call Her Daddy,
and this is a recent episode. I just want you
to try to go and decode this when a.

Speaker 1 (02:15):
Man fall in love with me. They're full in love
for me, for my pussy, for my personality, and because
I'm a really pretty girl. If a man is gonna
cheat on you, they're just gonna cheer on you, because
that's just men. A man will cheat on you with
the ugliest brokeus poly finest or probably the ugliest bitches.
It really depends on the night. It really depends who's
available and who's around. Okay, So it's not like it's that, oh,

(02:37):
he cheated on her, because this bitch is bad. The
girls that I've been seeing, I'll be like, I'm surprised.
I'm not in your caliber. You fucking bitch is like this.
And I've always been very I've never been insecure.

Speaker 2 (02:48):
I went I Yeah, I didn't understand any of that,
and I'm sorry the album is a bit missing. But again,
it took her sick seven years to go and put
out the second album, and by the drama, well, she'd
just answered her own question and right there that answer
and call our daddy is a lot. But if you

(03:10):
subscribe to the musings of Cardi B for your dating life,
then I would suggest you look up for another route. Okay, Anyway,
let's move on to the actual subject got hand. Let's
get into a new study that came out a meta
synthesis study publishing the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships.
It's that people use dating apps solely to find love

(03:33):
or hook cup. So they went through twenty one studies
across from multiple studies to put a picture together about
why people engage with dating platforms, the motivations that are
normally not added a normal surveys that I might even
get to read about. So the research team Jenna el
McPherson Rachel D Robnett, so two women. They put this

(03:56):
together and looking at works published in English and Spanish.
An initial setup more with a seven thousand candidate articles,
and that twenty one of these studies specifically examine users'
motivations for online dating. So they identified eight overarching motive
categories romantic relationships, sexual relationships, socializing, entertainment, self enhancement, convenience, curiosity,

(04:20):
and external influences. So they're trying to say, what's the
real modus operandi between all the people that are on
online dating. Do they really give a shit about trying
to meet someone or is it for their own personal
entertainment their own enjoyment. So again the eight categories romantic relationships,
long term relationships, looking for real love, sexual relationships that's hookups, situationships, socializing,

(04:51):
which is could be again meeting friends, which I had
never understood anybody going on a dating app and saying, oh,
I'm just looking for friends, I just want to be
friends now, entertainment self enhancement, So self enhancement would be
I would say sugardaddies or anybody looking for translating transactional
convenience because people don't want to go ahead and go

(05:12):
out and meet people in the real world. Curiosity like
what kind of people would attract to me and who
would want to be attracted to and external influences, so
people that might encourage hey I got online didting and
this did for me, they could do for you. So
the dominant thread was seeking romantic relationships. Primary focus on

(05:35):
long term commitment companionship or marriage. Now situationships. Hookups f
buddies was a frequently appearing in all these studies, but
not the context of casual encounters. Some were focused exploring
intimacy or desire within existing relationships, so they also looked
at the dating app usage, describer and discovering users joining

(05:58):
or using apps for entertainment the past time release stress
social because if you're like, well, if we're not going
out and doing anything and they just want to go
and just kill time, yeah, let's just try to meet people,
you know, to people to talk about things. External influences
would be considering peer pressure or a breakup. Get it

(06:19):
back off the rebounds, somebody says, usually go dating, go
on there, Go find a man, go find a boy,
go find a girlfriend. Whatever. They also look at the
variations by democratic group, so those that are LGBTQ are
more more likely than heterosexual participants to cite safety, belonging,
and convenience as motivating factors. Then he apps, they say,

(06:41):
help to circumvent the issue by allowing users to screen
dating partners on the basis of sexual identity and other characteristics.
But I can't say that on some sites unless they
specifically put in there where you can say what your
gender is, or what your sexual persuasion is or orientation.
I can tell you that there's some people that will

(07:02):
not say who they are and what their real intent is.
When you have those that you think are women on
these dating sites and they happen to end up being men.
That does happen. Trust me, there are those that are
going to say that they've been able to go, you know,
transition to the point where they're female enough to pass

(07:24):
themselves off completely and they don't think that you need
to go and divulge that they were men at one time,
or you know, some way around that. So older adults
often lean towards emotional connection and companionship over sex or
esteem driven motives, so into the study itself, so ends

(07:47):
up more in the story about these sexual motivations. Sexual
minority participants were more than likely to use that he
apps to access specific communities. There was one participant describing
how the app Jacked allowed him to interact with other
gay or bisexual men in a comfort zone where he
didn't have to guess other sexual orientation or fear rejection
or violence. And there is the part of that That's

(08:08):
why I'm talking about guessing other sexual orientation if people
are not going to be upfront about it, which I
hope people will be, just so there's no possibility of
something happening and going wrong. Now, Robinette told Sideposts that quote,
we were interested in whether people from different groups had
different reasons for engaging online dating relative to participants who

(08:29):
identified as heterosexual, participants who identified as lesbian, gay, bisexual,
or queer, we're especially likely to note that they appreciate
the safety, belonging, and convenience that a dating apps afford.
So some LGBTQ participants explain that more traditional dating methods
like meaning someone at a bar, can be challenging and
even dangerous if you don't know their sexual identity because

(08:51):
LBGTQ people continue to face stigma aggression of valles on
the basis of sexual identity, and dating apps helped to
circumvent the issue. I mean, I guess, but you know,
when I think about dating, they are a plethora of
bars that are for alternative communities. I mean swingers clubs,

(09:12):
gay bars, definitely. I mean there is that, and also
just the communities that you're in. I mean, you know,
if I wanted to go ahead and swing around with
the same sex or somebody who was in transition or
whatever I want, I could go take a trip down
to Wilton Manors or it is some of their clubs
that are around that. You just know, you'll see the flags,
you'll see identity for it, and that's always been something

(09:35):
that kind of helps as an identifiers. So for the
fact that they can't find out where they are gonna go, well,
you can find an LBGTQ plant, you can find an
LGBTQ flag on many different establishments to identify as friendly,
and there's been many of those like that. I guess
it doesn't happen everywhere, but it's very common down where

(09:56):
I'm at, at least that's why I see. They also
looked at people that use dating apps out of curiosity, boredom,
or peer pressure, and that they would join the apps
so because their friends did it or because everyone else
was doing it, and others use dating apps as a
way to move on from a breakup, boost the confidence
or past time during a stressful period. If you even

(10:16):
used dating apps for business purposes such as meaning people
in specific professions or finding clients. Now I'm going to
say that I do use dating apps that I have,
not dating apps, but dating sites, because some of the
sites I've gone to didn't necessarily have dating apps. But
I know for me that if I wanted to go
and meet people, and I was gonna meet anybody nearby,

(10:39):
there's a lot of varying factors about where I look
at dating now where I don't really look at dating
about how I use dating sites or dating apps because
for me, I think at the end of the day,
I still want to go and meet somebody in person
if I'm going to date. Honestly, I want somebody in
person I'm going to meet. But there are so money

(11:00):
variables now that you have to worry about where I mean,
first of all, if you want to meet somebody, you
got to be able to know what it's the right
moment in time to go and catch them to go
and talk, Like how many times am I going out?
First of all, I'm keeping myself kind of tuned out
because I have headphones on, earbud's on all time. If
I'm out and I'm just working or I'm exercising, if

(11:24):
I'm just getting you my steps, I'll I'll always have
my earbuds at any time, pop them in and just
go along and do what I gotta do with whether
they're shopping, whether it's working which might include shopping, or
might be working out or just doing something else. Because
I'm just tuning myself out, I'm just enjoining the music.
I mean, in my vibe. I'm in my zone, and

(11:45):
I don't see many times where if I have the
opportunity to go ahead and you know, small talk somebody,
it's just a small talk because I've been so detached
from the idea of doing getting into dating in the
first place, because in my ongoing study, my research, which
is what I've always offered up on this program, I'm

(12:08):
always in the opinion where when I'm trying to understand
myself better, try to be a better person, self improve
you know. My thing is of some of the people
that I've met, some of the women that I've met
on dating sites, and how I've been obd to go
and keep some kind of relationship with them where they

(12:28):
still keep coming back and we talk and look in
a perfect world, I would be enamored, flattered, thrilled, beyond
belief with some of the women I've gotten the chance
to meet. I would love to go and get together
with and be with and date and who knows what else.
It's been nice to meet some really sweet, beautiful girls

(12:51):
online younger than I am, I age, whatever there is,
that's cool because for whatever reason, online I had a
better experience, not always been great. It's the same thing
like if you meet you in person. But it's just
like as I've gotten older, you know, it's the ability
to talking about voice and what I write that makes

(13:13):
it much easier for me to go ahead and get
in contact. Because forever, when I was on dating sites
in my twenties and thirties, all I could do was
text and remember that too, there was always the constant
barrier that kept happening. With dating apps and dating sites,
more and more more of a barrier, more of a

(13:35):
wall that keeps you away from getting to meet somebody.
The example, when I went on let's say e Harmony
or love at AOL or match even back of the day,
you might talk with somebody for a while and then
maybe after a couple of weeks or a month or

(13:56):
three months of the most you would be trying to
meet up who try to serve that first date. But
then that just became something that just didn't happen. I mean,
how often do I hear things now about and I thought,
you know, I might have been one of the first
ones to do this, to get this kind of thing
where I would talk with somebody for a year before
I got to meet them, But I just sort of

(14:18):
girl that I saw, he said, gorgeous model on TikTok,
and she just said she was talking with somebody online
for a year, and then all of a sudden he
ghosted her. I don't really know why, but you know,
some things just happened where we are just enjoying the
dating apps out of curiosity and we just want to
meet who we can meet. It's like that personal just

(14:42):
some emotional connection, an attachment to somebody, and the fact
that we have to go look for online. But give
me my point. In my twenties and thirties, you had
to deal with the fact that, okay, if I wasn't
on one of those chat sites, which was when we
had the day sites. Early on, we also had the

(15:03):
call sites where you could just go on a phone
chat and you'd call into a number and you would
listen to different ads of different people, and then you
would leave a message for them while they were on
the line as well, and then if they would write
your back, you would then try to make a connection,
and with the time that you bought available, you would
then go ahead and take time to go and talk
to that person until you know you only had so

(15:25):
many minutes left. But then you know, if you had
somebody you were talking to with the amount of minutes,
amount of call time that you had, then you would
talk to them for what you could and make sure
to get their number so you can contact them vacu later.
But then we had the thing where with the dating sites,
people just started getting more into the habit of texting,

(15:47):
and then the texting. You might get a phone number
and then you'd just start text text text on the
phone number. But now that got it turned away because
of social media. Now we have oh no, any have
my snapschat on my what's my Instagram? My Facebook? And
that's what we have now changed so much in time,
but that's where we are right now and more of

(16:11):
a barrier to the point where I still remember meeting
a girl on one site and for it was over
a year and we were off and on talking and
I was just like, okay, when I felt like nothing
was going on with this, then all of a sudden
she might reach back out to me and then it's like,
all right, we're talking again. And then I finally met

(16:34):
with her one night and it was so awkward because
I mean, yeah, she was a pretty girl everything, and
I thought, you know, from the exterior was good, but
like we had talked so much and I felt like
I didn't know anything about her after a year, and
I just felt like this wasn't worth it. And then

(16:55):
I just went and said, ah, I'm not going to
worry about it. And it was things like that. It
just made me kind of just get completely lost in
the idea of even dating on the apps anymore because
it was just talk talk back and forth or and
the thing was, now we're the point where it used
to be, well, I want to just feil together the phone,
you know, get to meet up after a while of messages,

(17:17):
then texts, then calls, then meet up. But then the
calls went away, and then the texts on a phone
went away. So now we're behind the website or a
text or chatting platform on social media. That's what we've
gotten to I forgot telegrams. Add that tour endimics, right,

(17:43):
and that's what happens. And then remember we also now
have the sites where like a telegrammer WhatsApp, you could
just delete the chat if you want to, and you
can disappear and goes just like that, see through a stepchat.
It's like amazing, but it's like nobody wants to go
and put any kind of permanent connection together, so that

(18:08):
curiosity part is there, and so I just started playing
into it because I didn't worry about, oh, I'm going
to meet this person someday. I would kind of say,
I would, oh, maybe I'm all go ahead and you know,
take a flight, but I never did. But you know,
it didn't matter. Just after a while, just just got
tired of it was just talk, just to talk. When

(18:32):
it used to be that I used to talk about
myself so much, and I will be the one initiating
conversation all the time with a girl when I'm on
dating sites. Now it's reversed. I am not the one
trying to go ahead and keep the conversation going. I
expect the female I'm talking to you to be the

(18:53):
one that reaches out to me all the time because
I decided to go to reverse the script, and the
same thing goes when it comes to the conversations, It's
not about me, it's about them. I'm getting to know
them better because I want to understand the women and
how they tick, and I want to under and analyze
them because it's not about me at all. I mean,

(19:15):
for me, I'm just older, maybe a little bit wiser,
and I can offer some things, you know, when it
comes to understanding younger women and women that are, you know,
a couple of years younger than me or whatever, regardless
of they have kids, regardless of that they have you know,
a very big career, or what it's like, you know,

(19:36):
just to get to connect with a girl that you
know from all physical and personal traits that they have.
Of course, everybody has their flaws. Of course I have
my flaws. But there's a lot to love about the
woman that I'm talking to. There's an affection towards her
as much as there can be online when there's nothing else.

(19:58):
But I'm also not getting it to the fantasy of like,
oh what would be like together and all. But the
thing is is that if I'm talking to any girl
right now, it's that the ones that I'm going to
be speaking with are ones that I find very attractive
and vibrant, and they're fun and they have pretty cool personalities,

(20:20):
and they're submissive and they're soft, and they're understanding, and
they're patient, and they've had you know, some bad luck
here and there. But I hope to go ahead and
be you know, a different like a different shade of light,
a ray of sunshine and a cloudy day for them,

(20:40):
because it makes me feel like I'm getting something out
of it and I'm not giving out a whole lot
from vineer. So that's the whole idea. But yeah, for me,
it's like I want to do that part. Now here's
another part I also talk about here too, dating apps
for business purposes, meaning people in specific professions are finding clients. Well,
I never did that on a dating side, and I
never thought that would actually work. But I will say

(21:03):
that when I was out travel, you know, for business
that you do use your flirtations, your charm, your personality,
And I would say that in business connections that I
had with women that I found very attractive, and I
would be talking to that I thought, you know, persuasively,
might be somebody to get to connect the network with

(21:24):
that I might be able to work with some down
somewhere downline. I would definitely do that. And there were
a hand for girls that were like that where I
just got to meet with them in some kind of
social networking kind of scheme and we got together. We
met because there was always like at a conference, we
might have a setting like you know, a lounge or
a bar, restaurant, things like that, and or you know,
some kind of event party, get together, club, this and that,

(21:47):
and I would go and talk to some of the
girls that I want to go and talk to and
just like, okay, we're I'm going to just throw mu
charm out, you know. And it was just kind of
fun like that. But it was me meeting people that
I would definitely go to CONNEC with again on a
business level because it was worth doing that also just
make a woman feel pumped up, feel good about herself,

(22:08):
you know, and in the whole space, because some of
them were kind of young and that might be new
into the space, so you take advantage of that. It
was especially something I did in the tech space because
we would always have a lot of new people would
come to a new space, whether either it was in
marketing or they were you know, work in the engineering
side of things, and you got to meet a lot
of new people. It was just nice to go and

(22:29):
just connect and you know, let the pleasantries, the compliments,
the good spirits all come around. And it was nothing
more than platonic. That's all. It was gonna be, but
I would never do it on a dating app or
dating site. I never thought about that. They alsook about

(22:50):
facilitating short term sexual encounters. Finding demonstrated that this is
one of the only one of the main reasons why
people use dating apps. People also use these platforms to
find long term romantic partners for platonic flirendships, and a
few studies indicative of people who use dating apps to
learn more about themselves and their preferences, improve their self esteem,
practice skills such as flirting, and use the platform strategically

(23:14):
flexibly with an intent to meet a variety needs. Exactly,
But why am I doing that? And why are other
people doing as well? Because we don't believe dating apps
actually help you meet people for love. Does that make sense?
Let me say that one more time when this researcher

(23:35):
says that one of the many reasons why people use
dating apps, it's to look for platonic friendships or that
they will use them to learn more about themselves and
their preferences, improve their self esteem, and practice skills are
as flirting and strategically flexibly with intent meat a variety

(23:55):
of needs. Bingo, I'm using it for self improvement. I'm
using it to show that I can bond and I
can connect with a woman that I find very desirable,
and why doing that it makes me ready for when
I can find somebody in real life. But I'm not

(24:17):
going to find that person on that dating app because
the dating apps don't serve that purpose anymore. That's right,
I said it. It's so obvious now it's more true
than ever. The researchers also found relatively few differences based

(24:37):
on gender when they looked at limitations in existing literature.
They still see where gender is treated as binary and
often fails to include or differentiate between cisgender, transgender, and
non binary individuals. And I don't do that either, because
if you've noticed, on this program, I never talk about
the genders as multiple because at the end of the day,

(24:58):
regardless of what pronoun you'd prefer, what gender you identify as,
there's still a dominant and a submissive. It still comes
down to that, and it somehow works that way. I
was just thinking about the fact that I, you know,
worked for Uber on the weekends and I'm part time,

(25:20):
and you know, I've been doing a lot of grocery orders,
and it was a grocery order had to go and
pick up, and I saw it was a lesbian couple.
So one person shorter hair, definitely was the more dominant,
and then it was another female, longer hair, a little
bit more of a softer look, more of the fem

(25:43):
You could see that butch are feminine, dominant or submissive.
It was definitely there, and I think that identifies with
any kind of group, whether it's a gay couple or
if it's whatever kind of couple you want. There's a
dominant and a submissive, and I think that the research
always can work if you go that route. Is you

(26:04):
want to try with gender, I think it's just more difficult.
That's why the studies has not done gender identification of
multiple genders, because it's very difficult and also hard to
find the studied partners the participants to be a part
of that as well. I would imagine they also notice
that there are gaps pointing to a larger issue in
dating at research, that studies are often focused on young

(26:27):
heterosexual users and overlook older adults, gender diverse of individuals
as sexual minorities. Okay, we want to focus on younger
users because one of the things is that for dating,
you know they're gonna be much more technologically savvy, and
I think for me, I think the studying of how

(26:48):
men and women are online dating today it's one of
those things where like, okay, you can identify with people
that are meaning in person, but it's the issues of
the toxicity of relationships, the trauma that can come out
of a relationship if things go sour, and the choices
that some of these younger people are making when it

(27:08):
comes to dating without any wisdom whatsoever. They're just basically
what's going on instinct that they have, whatever they learned,
and whatever kind of family structures they had at home
to realize what kind of role models they should follow
when they're trying to find a right partner very difficult.
And then the study also raises questions about how dating
apps themselves could evolve to better serve user groups, and

(27:29):
that many people use apps for friendship, emotional support, or
self growth, not just serve for man's and sex. And
that's one of the things that the women that I've
got the chance to meet, they have reached out to
me because I have been more for emotional support or
for self growth, because that's what it is. If they've

(27:49):
had bad relationships or bad experiences. Do you want to
meet with somebody older that's you know, not befringing them,
not trying to go ahead and look for some kind
of hidden agenda or sex, because it's amazing, it's so true.
You know, when you meet somebody in person, if it's
a girl that you're meeting a person, you're a guy.
You know, how many girls do you know that you

(28:11):
know always think, oh, this guy is looking to go
and if you had a chance to go hook up
with me and take me to bed, he would because
it's always about sex in ahead. Well, I mean, the
women can go and think that all they want, but
it's like, it's not that easy to go ahead and
think the same way when you have a woman talking
to you online and she's not in your same neighborhood.

(28:32):
Might be in the country, he might be a couple
of states away, but that whole oh he just wants
me for to get laid, not it doesn't work too
much work to beuyd that unless they're trying to go
and get Unless a woman is trying to get persuaded
to go ahead and fly someplace and they're bought a
ticket or whatever. When I obviously in the sex is

(28:52):
a of course the factor. But what they took from
all this says that they can offer important insights that
can help researchers, clinicians, and dating app designers understand complex
motivations behind online dating. Which there should be dating sites
that probably work for one thing or another. But it
doesn't really matter about these dating app designers trying to

(29:15):
figure out the right type of site, to figure out
the right type of agenda or mo that somebody has. Okay,
I would just prefer that dating apps don't worry about
trying to be a gimmick. Just make yourself open. Make
yourself a dating site that everybody, anybody wants to go

(29:36):
and be on, that has the best possible chance for
people to go ahead and connect. You make it where
people want to go there. Lots of people want to
go there, Get on there and be noticed. Let me
tell you this as well. At the end of the day,
so you might have the toxic sites that are your
traditional sites like hinge or bumble or tender. But the

(29:59):
thing is, like I said, the sugar Daddy sites have
worked out better because you see a lot more people
in your neck of the woods. Within ten twenty fifteen,
hundred miles from you, plus other people that are out there.
There's a lot of choices, and that's what people want
at the end of the day, is choices. They also thought, well,

(30:20):
they want to examine how experiences such as dating fatigue, burnout,
or algorithmic matching influences and user goals and satisfaction. Well,
if you're smart enough not to go and worry about
the algorithm and what it brings, you don't even worry
about it. Because some of those sites, you know, sure
Dady sites don't have that. They really don't even worry
about that kind of thing. But these are the sites
they have to going to try every gimmick possible to

(30:42):
try to get somebody to go in and notice it
doesn't really work that way, doesn't matter motives for engaging
in online dating. A meta censusis so go ahead, look
for that and find out more information about it, because
there's a lot of information out there to go and
look at and you can see if it looks looks
like something that was pretty good or not. A couple
of quick stories bring up real quick before we wrap

(31:02):
everything up. New York Post to put out a story
about biobating, and they is toxic dating trend now with singles.
It's the practice of over selling yourself on the dating
bat bio to make yourself seem more interesting and appealing.
So if they have somebody that you're looking on a

(31:22):
dating app or a dating profile and you see someone
that says, oh, they do skiing, hiking, horseback writing, reading,
a cooking, a pretty much cultured, a well rounded it's
not lying, but it's misleading potential partners, and that would
lead to bad dates and disillusionment. They saw the story
here that a recent service says that sixty admitted of

(31:45):
feeling let down after meeting someone who didn't live up
to the carefully polished dating app profile. And the point
that they're trying to make here is that it's important
not to idealize a dating profile. I meet the person
in real life as soon as possible, to stop building
a fantasy in your mind. But people don't do that.
It's so common that people don't even bother to go

(32:05):
and do that at all. A new toxic trend out
there biobating, keep an eye on that. And finally, Huntington posts.
Huntington posts, excuse me, I haven't follow them in a
long time. They put out a story saying that men
are sharing difficult parts of mount our dating and as
a woman, I never thought of some of these. So
here are some of the things that he said that

(32:26):
ditting is tough. Took from Reddit, by the way, on
some of these ports, So they're men online now that
are asking about this on Reddit. The question is what's
been the hardest part of dating as a man? First
person says the constant rejection getting ridiculous thousand times and

(32:46):
you get more than a little gun shy. The words
is one. They assume it must be a joke, because
you have to be joking if you think she might
be interested. Another one saying I've seen female friends cry
for hours over the fact that one guy said no
when they asked him out. How often it was guyso
never go understand how they feel. Another says that I
had a couple of first states last month. All of
them gave me their number, some of them said that

(33:07):
we should meet again. None of reply when I've asked
about going out on a date somewhere offering dinner. It's
been a month and some of my messages are still
marked as unread on WhatsApp. Another person says that the
absence of opportunity on dating apps. One person says that
I've been out of the dming pool for a few
years now, I still can't forget the number of messages

(33:29):
my ex had in twenty fourteen likely had more messages
in two months than I received in some four years
of combined dating account. So frankly, she wasn't a ten
out of Tendor close to with either. Another person, I
was lucky to be lucky to get five mystery likes
a week on Tender. I could go a month without
receiving any of the replies, just when they're swiping away
for four weeks with zero return and one more. I'm

(33:50):
going to take care after a while. Trying to get
a damn day for Saturday night feels like going hat
in hand asking for money. I mean, if a female
friend approached me and asked me to set her up
with her five foot a line one hundred and fifty
pounds schele guy who likes to bike and roller skate,
has a slight British accent, studies physics. MA reply, wably,
I can do that, but probably can only get four
guys that match this description exactly. It's gonna take me

(34:11):
about twenty minutes. If I ask a female friend if
she has any fecal friends who would be interested in
a guy like me, they get a he gets a
quick reply of no, wow. And there's a lot more
like that huff post if we want to take a
look at that as well. But there you go. The
dating apps are not giving us good answers. We're not

(34:32):
getting anywhere with it, which is why I've been kind
of like, I use the dating apps, like I said,
for curiosity, for helping others with self growth, self enhancement,
Like I'm trying to make good connections here, But it
would be nice to get back to the way it
was where I didn't have to worry about dating apps.
I could just go back out and you know, find
a love motel and go find a girl to go

(34:54):
hook up with that I just met that day and said,
you know what, that's going to meet up? You know,
I guess sometime middle of the afternoon, let's go over
this place I know of, you know, I'll put down
it for a couple of hours when we can get
a little of the prey at the bots