Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to Excuse Us. The podcast appeals back the layers
of a small town life, uncovering the hidden horrors lurking
just beneath the surface of Joyspell, North Carolina, from the
tale of a quaint little diner to the chilling corporate
secrets of Blind Corp. This is in your ordinary postpacolleptive
survival story. No, this is something much darker, much weirder,
much funnier, perhaps th all from the perspective of the
(00:25):
only survivor. You'll dive into a quirky, fragmented recollection of
chaos and growing dread that led to joy Spell's downfall.
Oh and a little bit of warning before we get started.
Excuse Us contains mature content intended for a mature audience,
a strong language, and, lets you say, a rather twisted
sense of humor is intended. Little indiscretion is definitely advised.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Hello, Welcome to Blindcorp. I'm Lea and Newton Johnson and
my pleasure to introduce you to one of the most
innovative and extort companies to work for today. Whether you're
new to the team or transferring to a new role,
you have just made a brilliant decision here At Blindcorp,
we believe in the future and we're excited is half
(01:30):
as part of it. At Blindcorp, our people are our
greatest assets. We pride ourselves on providing the best benefits
and opportunities for growth. We know work life balance is key,
which is why we offer a range of fantastic benefits,
including but not limited to health insurance, vision insurance, dental
(01:51):
insurance because we know a healthy smile goes a long way,
life insurance and disability insurance to give you and your
loved ones a peace of mind. Pay time off and
flexible schedules because we value your time both on and
off the job, employee discounts on our cutting edge products,
(02:11):
and of course we offer time and packages to help
you plan for your future. But that's not all. As
Blind Corp, we believe in you and investing.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
In you.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
Job training and pay training programs. So whether you're fresh
we're advancing your career, you have all the change you
need to succeed, with plenty of opportunities for advancements in
your career at Blind Corp is always growing. We encourage
personal development as well, and the chance to take one
more responsibility is always on the horizon. Look at that,
(03:10):
we talked a lot about our benefits and our growth
and opportunities. Let's get into something just as important. Safety
At Blank Core. Safety comes first. Whether you're working at
a main headquarters at one of our most prestigious of outposts,
you'll need to be aware of safety hazards specific to
your rule. Make sure you're familiarized with yourself and the
(03:37):
safety protocols in your department. This includes, but not limited
to using the correct protective gear, understanding emergency procedures, and
knowing where the nearest first aid kit and fire extinguishers
are located. Your safety is our priority, and for those
working in sensitive areas like our research labs or specialized
(04:00):
production floors, security is crucial. Different levels of clearance may
be required, so make sure you have the proper badges
and approvals to access certain areas. Line Corp takes security seriously,
and we know you will too.
Speaker 3 (04:24):
A let's see this one.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Always carry your security badge. I almost forgot mine, thanks
Gary falk Off. Gary, follow clearance articles and report any
suspicious activity immediately. Somebody can't carry. Safety and security are
integral to maintaining the integrity of the work we do. Here,
(04:58):
can we use a different word or than.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (05:10):
All right?
Speaker 2 (05:19):
With Blind corps expanding network of outposts, there are exciting
opportunities to work all over. Whether it's in one of
our main offices or at one of our remote locations,
Blind Corp is everywhere, Always innovading is happening. That's a
weird fucking sense. So welcome once again to Blindcorp. We're
(05:42):
thrilled to have you join us. Remember this is more
than just a job here, You're part of something larger,
something that's shaping the future. Stay safe, stay curious, and
together we'll achieve great things.
Speaker 3 (06:01):
Old while I could watch them? Are you did you
see me in there?
Speaker 4 (06:12):
It never gets old?
Speaker 3 (06:13):
Huh?
Speaker 4 (06:15):
What where were you in that video?
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Em somewhere in the middle. It was in early morning
and I was rocking out these beautiful stash Yeah you.
Speaker 4 (06:25):
Know, Thomas.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Did you ever find out why we are alive? Because
of that guy Liam Newton Johnson? Yeah, mister, I'll be
checking out on videos walking by.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
His real name is Jonathan Mentone Wilson.
Speaker 4 (06:44):
That guy, Wait a minute, that's right.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
He set up a double blind protocol designated to activating
the event of a company wide crisis. Under this system,
the name quote Wilson and would be deliberately excluded from
any field operations and instead he would receive a direct
notification to take action.
Speaker 4 (07:09):
To terminal C bunker. A. Huh, that's right one there
we were so feel and far apart.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
He never fully tested the command I guess. So that's
how we got the orange notice.
Speaker 4 (07:24):
What about the guy who spoke to you and us,
I guess, and the command operations when we were trying
to check in mm.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Hm, Well, I reached out to him and after a
lengthy back and forth about safety and none disclosure, blind
core policy if finally he revealed his name to me Wilson,
mother fucking Wilson.
Speaker 5 (07:50):
Shit.
Speaker 4 (07:51):
Well, there you have it. And I really liked my
last name, to be honest with you, Thomas.
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Why, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
I just always felt there was too common.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Welcome to Blindcourt. My name is Liam Newton Johnson, Founder
and CEO. Now thund disclaimer, take that out. Take that out.
I'll be guiding you through your orientation. First of all,
congratulations on joining our esteemed ranks. Here at Blancorp. We
pride ourselves on pushing the boundaries of science innovation, and
(08:40):
human potential. Sometimes why literally, you're about to embark or
be part of something much bigger than you can imagine,
a collective mission to unlock the deepest, most unfathomable mysteries
of the world, and perhaps others lane beyond that one.
(09:00):
Here at Blankcorp. We know there are risks, serious ones,
and we don't shy away from them. In fact, in
those moments of uncertainty that we find true discovery. Sure
there have been incidents, experiments that have gone shall we say,
of course, but rest assured all of it is in
(09:22):
the noble pursuit of scientific process, and for those who sacrifice,
their names are remembered somewhere somehow, I'm sure of led.
Some of you may have heard rumors, stories of our past,
lush fursh of certain experiments, or as they are commonly
(09:45):
referred to, crimes against hinanity. Yes, it is true. Blankcorp.
Has a legacy, one that stretches back decades, perhaps even centuries.
While some call it controversial, we prefer to think of
it as a pioneering. In fact, in the past we've
(10:05):
broken barriers in areas like medicine, technology, and well more
exotic fields. Sure there were some unfortunate outcomes, But isn't
that the price we pay when reaching for the unknown?
No breakthrough comes with out it sacrifices.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
You know. I always saw had a little differently because
of my father. He used to say he got the
will Son not just to do anything, but to do everything.
He was a quirky guy, full of flaws, and he
could sell ice to an Eskimo in January if he wanted. Anyway,
(10:52):
According to this staffing pay Companies legend in Bland Court,
printed out maybe two weeks before the incident, there should
at least be seven or eight of us here.
Speaker 4 (11:06):
All that thought, Thomas, I want to hear more, but
I'm heading back in and hopefully this time I'll get
something a bit more useful.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
You know.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
Well, good luck and what good job?
Speaker 1 (11:24):
Sure?
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Okay? Thanks?
Speaker 4 (11:27):
Was your father's name, Thomas as well? Indeed it was
agent Wilson.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
All right, Now let's talk about what's ahead of you. Yes,
(12:02):
there's a chance of serious injury, perhaps even death. It
is unfortunate side effect of the groundbreaking work we do here.
But think of the discovery, the knowledge you could be
part of worth every risk. Wouldn't you say?
Speaker 1 (12:19):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (12:19):
You would? You'd agree to those terms and conditions. Of course,
we offer plenty of incentives to healthier stay focused on
the job, like generous benefit packages including health, dental, and
envision insurance, as well as disability coverage. After all, we
wouldn't want anything too permanent to happen to you, at
least not right now. Let's not forget little things. You're
(12:50):
a blank or we make life easier for you with
free parking, including ample handicapped spaces for those who might
need it, flexible word schedule. Whether you're working late nights
on an Eldritch experiment, opening the doors to another dimension,
or just coming in for the annual Thanksgiving potluck, We've
(13:11):
got you covered. We're speaking of Thanksgiving. We're a big
on tradition here. Every year we host that corporate potluck
where we gather and share food, stories, ucational, classified secret
or two. It is a great point of board with glips,
the delicate balance between camaraderie and madness. But remember, as
(13:37):
you enjoy the turkey and cranberry side, there's always more
to uncover at Tine Corp. Just be careful not to
ask too many questions. Some things I've better left unset,
an unknown.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
All right, Miss de Waitress number two.
Speaker 5 (14:05):
It all started with a soft meow on a rainy
Tuesday evening when Luna mcfluffernutter, who had always preferred the
company of dogs, heard a strange noise at her door.
She had just settled down in her tiny apartment in
Joyceville with a cup of tea and an overdue knitting
project when the sound caught her attention. Miow. Luna paused
(14:28):
mid stitch, brow furrowing. Did I leave the TV on?
She muttered to herself. But no, the room was quiet
except for the distant patter of rain against the windows.
Another soft, insistent meow echoed through her hallway. Setting down
her project, Luna patted over to the door and cautiously
(14:50):
opened it, Sitting there as if it owned the place.
Was a Persian cat, its fur immaculate despite the drizzle outside.
Wide golden eyes stared up at her unblinking. Well, hello,
Luna said, her heart unexpectedly softening at the sight of
the fluffy intruder. Where did you come from? The cat
(15:13):
simply blinked and pushed past her ankles into the apartment
as if it had been invited. Luna sighed and shut
the door resigning herself to the feline guest. All right,
you can stay for now. I'll find your owner tomorrow.
The next day, Luna asked around the building. She'd never
been particularly close to her neighbors, but everyone knew Adele
(15:36):
Fronto Russet's He lived directly next door, A quiet man
who kept mostly to himself, but people whispered about his
odd hours and strange deliveries. Luna had assumed he was
just one of those eccentric types. When she knocked on
Adele's door, it creaked open, the latch already broken, A
(15:56):
cold breeze swept through the hallway, and the air smelled off.
Hesitating for a moment, Luna pushed the door wide open.
The apartment was in disarray, papers scattered across the floor,
furniture overturned, and in the center of the chaos Adele lifeless.
(16:17):
Luna gasped, backing out of the room in shock. She
fumbled for her phone, calling the police, but as she
stood there in the hallway, her eyes fell on the
Persian cat, who had somehow followed her next door. It
sat in the doorway, watching her with those intense golden eyes,
as if it knew something.
Speaker 3 (16:36):
She didn't.
Speaker 5 (16:38):
After the initial shock wore off, Luna couldn't shake the
feeling that something was wrong with the whole situation. Suicide
was the official verdict, but something didn't sit right with
her and that cat, Adele's cat, she assumed, had been
acting strange ever since. It would sit on the edge
of her couch, staring out the window at the world beyond,
(17:00):
as if waiting for something or someone. Luna began to dig.
She had always fancied herself a bit of an amateur sleuth,
solving puzzles and piecing things together, so she started with
Adele's apartment. With the police having already cleared out, it
wasn't hard to slip back in unnoticed. She found notes
(17:22):
scattered and cryptic, but one word kept appearing. H Ok.
What in the world is h awk? Luna whispered, flipping
through a bundle of papers. Then she noticed something else.
One of the papers bore the logo of a familiar company,
Blind Corporation. She'd heard of them in passing, some kind
(17:48):
of corporate giant with fingers. In every possible industry, there
were always rumors swirling about secret experiments and shadowy dealings,
but no one had ever managed to prove anything. Still,
Luna's curiosity deepened as she delved deeper into Adele's life.
Luna discovered he wasn't just a quiet neighbor. He had
(18:10):
been a scientist, a lead researcher in fact, for Blind
Corp his project, the Hawk Initiative. Luna struggled to make
sense of the cryptic documents she uncovered, but from what
she could gather, Hawk wasn't just a science project. It
(18:30):
was something far more sinister. Words like genetic alteration and
human experimentation jumped off the page. A chill ran down
her spine. It seemed Adele hadn't been the only one
involved in this project. Other researchers had gone missing or
met mysterious ends, and Adele, it seemed, had been trying
(18:51):
to expose the truth before his death. That's when Luna
realized he hadn't killed himself. Someone had silenced him him.
The more Luna unraveled, the more dangerous things became strange.
Men in black suits started lurking around her building, and
her phone would occasionally cut out mid conversation, But the
(19:12):
Persian cat stayed with her, watchful, always by her side,
as if guarding her from unseen threats. One night, while
rifling through Adele's personal computer with the help of a
tech savvy friend, she stumbled upon an encrypted file. After
hours of trying to crack it, a single message popped
(19:32):
up on the screen. They're coming for me. I've hidden everything.
The truth lies within h A w K. Stop them, Luna,
You're my only hope. Her heart raced. Adele had known
he was in danger, Knowing she would take up the mantle,
he had left everything to her. But before Luna could
(19:53):
process it, her front door burst open.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Leslie, let's talk about at Ben's men as always room
to move up. At Blancorn, as long as you're willing
to go to distance, whether it surviving a dangerous experiment
or simply mastering the art of secrecy, your dedication will
be rewarded. We offer pay, training, on the job, learning,
and the opportunity to reach heights you'd never thought possible,
(20:34):
both in your career and in your understanding of the universe.
So are you ready to begin your journey with Blancorph
Welcome to the fold. You've already taken the first step.
Now let's see how far you are willing to go.
Stay curious, stay committed and above all, stay careful. There
(20:58):
are things here watching, and they don't take kindly to
those who felt welcome to the future. Let's get started,
all right, that's good, wrap it up. I think I
can make my five DM Still, why don't I keep it?
(21:22):
This is the third time after to record these So
are we good? Are we good? Okay? Good?
Speaker 5 (21:41):
Luna barely had time to react. Two men, clearly agents
from Blind Corp, barged in. The persian cat darted between
their legs, hissing fiercely. Luna, mcfluffor nutter, you need to
come with us, one of the men demanded, his voice cold, No,
I don't think I will. Luna shot back, adrenaline pumping
(22:02):
through her veins. Adele was trying to expose you. I
know about h A w K. You can't silence me too.
The men exchanged a glance. One stepped forward, but before
he could reach her, the persian cat leaped at him,
clawing at his face. In the chaos that ensued, Luna
grabbed her bag, already packed with the documents she had uncovered,
(22:25):
and made a run for it. As she fled into
the night, the cat right on her heels. Luna knew
one thing for sure. Whatever h a w K was,
she would uncover the truth. Adele's death wouldn't be in
vain and blind corp. They wouldn't get away with this,
not if Luna mcfluffernutter had anything to say about it.
(22:48):
Waitress number two, known as Luna mcfluffernutter, was a seasoned
veteran of the Silver Awesome Diner who exuded an air
of confidence and efficiency in her every move. With a
self assured stride and a no nonsense attitude, she commanded
the room with her presence. Her short, neatly styled hair
framed her face, and her sharp eyes darted around, taking
(23:11):
in every detail and ensuring that nothing escaped her attention.
Having spent years honing her skills in the art of waitressing,
Luna had become a master of her craft. She knew
the ins and outs of the diner like the back
of her hand, effortlessly navigating through the bustling tables and
busy kitchen. Her efficiency was unmatched, and customers relied on
(23:34):
her to deliver prompt service with precision. Luna had developed
a rapport with the diners, earning their trust and building
lasting relationships. Her straightforward approach and no frills demeanor made
her a reliable and trusted presence in the diner. Customers
felt at ease in her capable hands, knowing that she
(23:54):
would attend to their needs swiftly and effectively. But beneath
Luna's confident exter there was a whimsical and unconventional soul
yearning for a touch of magic and whimsy in the
mundane world. Growing up in a small town that stifled
her spirit, she had always felt like an outsider. Luna's
(24:15):
mind was filled with vibrant colors, talking animals, and fantastical
adventures that others dismissed as childish fantasies. Finding solace in
the fast paced chaos of the Silver Awesome Diner, Luna
embraced her uniqueness and refused to conform to societal expectations.
She added her own touch of enchantment to the diner,
(24:38):
whether it was through colorful decorations, spontaneous dance parties, or
unexpected acts of kindness. Luna believed that even the simplest
tasks could be transformed into extraordinary experiences. However, while Luna
longed for someone to share in her whimsical musings, and
embrace the magic of everyday life. She often found herself
(25:00):
paired with waitresses who wanted no part in her fanciful nonsense. Undeterred,
Luna's fiery spirit and sharp tongue could cut through any
skepticism or negativity, responding with a barrage of colorful curses
and sassy comebacks. In her heart, Luna knew that not
everyone would understand or appreciate her whimsical ways, but that
(25:23):
didn't stop her from remaining true to herself. She continued
to bring a touch of magic and a sprinkle of
nonsense to the Silver Awesome Diner, infusing it with her
vibrant spirit and spreading joy to those who were open
to it, even if they didn't initially realize they wanted it.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
So.
Speaker 5 (25:41):
As Luna glided through the bustling diner, her confident stride
never faltered. With every order she took, every dish she served,
and every smile she shared, she brought a little bit
of whimsy into the lives of the diners, leaving a
trail of enchantment in her wake. Luna Mcfluffernutter, the whimsical
(26:03):
force behind the Silver Awesome Diner, remained unapologetically herself, adding
a touch of magic to the everyday lives of those
around her, whether they welcomed it or not. This episode
is made possible by listeners like you. Visit our website
at lifdesign dot net. Forward slash excuse Us.
Speaker 6 (26:22):
For support or additional information, please visit our website or
Patreon page at patreon dot com. Forward slash rod.
Speaker 5 (26:30):
Bull Art Tonight's production of Excuse Us, a mystery drama
with delightful undertones of humor and Eldridge horror.
Speaker 6 (26:38):
What's produced by Rebecca Lakepool and Rodrigal Pool, Written and
directed and performed by Rodrigo Pool in association with R
and R Side Audio Theater.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
Music and sound effects by Epidemicsound. Some other sound effects
who are recorded live on set voice modulation by eleven Laps.
If you're enjoying this production, please make sure to review
or subscribe to our show wherever you listen to your podcast.
Speaker 6 (27:06):
Check out our Patreon page for bonus content.
Speaker 5 (27:08):
Until next time, this
Speaker 6 (27:11):
Is Rodrigo Poul saying thank you very much for listening.