November 4, 2024 • 40 mins
In this engaging conversation, Tisia Saffold shares her remarkable journey from a corporate career to becoming a successful entrepreneur and social media influencer. She discusses her early experiences in education, the challenges she faced during her transition, and the strategies she employed to grow her online presence.
Tisia emphasizes the importance of authenticity, consistency, and understanding audience preferences in content creation. She also highlights the need for automation and systems to manage the increased engagement that comes with viral growth. In this conversation, Tisia Saffold discusses her journey through sudden fame on social media, the mental health challenges that accompany it, and how she navigates criticism while building a supportive community.
She shares insights on the importance of resilience, the need for automation in her work, and her strategies for overcoming burnout. Tisia also provides a glimpse into her daily life as a content creator and her future plans, including community events and merchandise.
Takeaways
00:00 Introduction to Tisia's Journey
01:53 From Corporate to Purpose: Tisia's Early Career
05:08 The Leap of Faith: Embracing Entrepreneurship
07:37 Going Viral: The Shift to Influencing
10:06 Strategies for Social Media Growth
18:43 Navigating Different Platforms: Instagram vs. TikTok
20:25 Managing Growth: Automation and Systems
21:49 Navigating Fame and Recognition
23:12 Mental Health and Social Media Impact
27:15 Handling Criticism and Building Resilience
29:17 Creating a Supportive Community
34:36 Overcoming Burnout and Staying Motivated
36:19 Behind the Scenes: A Week in the Life
40:11 Future Plans and Exciting Projects
Instagram: @breannaaponte @thesoftlifeceo
Website: www.thesoftlifeceo.com
Community: www.thesoftlifeceo.com/society
Free Training: www.thesoftlifeceo.com/free-training-optin
Soft Life YouTube: @thesoftlifeceo
Relationship Restored: www.relationshiprestored.com
Tisia emphasizes the importance of authenticity, consistency, and understanding audience preferences in content creation. She also highlights the need for automation and systems to manage the increased engagement that comes with viral growth. In this conversation, Tisia Saffold discusses her journey through sudden fame on social media, the mental health challenges that accompany it, and how she navigates criticism while building a supportive community.
She shares insights on the importance of resilience, the need for automation in her work, and her strategies for overcoming burnout. Tisia also provides a glimpse into her daily life as a content creator and her future plans, including community events and merchandise.
Takeaways
- Tisia's journey reflects the importance of taking risks in one's career.
- The transition from corporate to entrepreneurship can be fulfilling but challenging.
- Going viral often requires authenticity and relatability in content.
- Understanding your audience is crucial for effective content delivery.
- Consistency in branding helps in establishing a strong online presence.
- Different social media platforms serve different purposes and audiences.
- Automation can help manage increased engagement effectively.
- Personal experiences can resonate deeply with audiences and foster connection.
- It's essential to have a clear understanding of what your brand represents.
- Tisia's story encourages others to embrace their unique paths. It's important to automate and seek help when overwhelmed.
- Recognition can change personal dynamics, including dating.
- Mental health is impacted by social media growth and criticism.
- Celebrating small wins is crucial for mental well-being.
- Criticism can be compartmentalized and used as motivation.
- Building a community is essential for sustained engagement.
- Redirecting efforts can help overcome burnout.
- Batch content creation can alleviate daily pressure.
- Maintaining a supportive circle is vital for mental health.
- Future plans include community events and merchandise.
00:00 Introduction to Tisia's Journey
01:53 From Corporate to Purpose: Tisia's Early Career
05:08 The Leap of Faith: Embracing Entrepreneurship
07:37 Going Viral: The Shift to Influencing
10:06 Strategies for Social Media Growth
18:43 Navigating Different Platforms: Instagram vs. TikTok
20:25 Managing Growth: Automation and Systems
21:49 Navigating Fame and Recognition
23:12 Mental Health and Social Media Impact
27:15 Handling Criticism and Building Resilience
29:17 Creating a Supportive Community
34:36 Overcoming Burnout and Staying Motivated
36:19 Behind the Scenes: A Week in the Life
40:11 Future Plans and Exciting Projects
Instagram: @breannaaponte @thesoftlifeceo
Website: www.thesoftlifeceo.com
Community: www.thesoftlifeceo.com/society
Free Training: www.thesoftlifeceo.com/free-training-optin
Soft Life YouTube: @thesoftlifeceo
Relationship Restored: www.relationshiprestored.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Imagine if you stop and you were gonna hit it,
you have to keep going sometimes that you don't reap
the benefits immediately. And that's just not a social media lesson,
that's a lesson for life.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Hey, I'm Brianna Aponte, your host of the Self Life
CEO podcast. I dropped out of college at the age
of nineteen to start my first business. I worked seven
days a week, wore way too many hats, and was
the true definition of a hustler. Years later, I'm finally
living the dream that I worked so hard to make
my reality. I've transitioned from a hustler to a soft
life CEO, working only two days a week to maintain
(00:33):
and run a high earning business that gives me the
freedom to live a life I love. Now, it's my
mission to help as many entrepreneurs as I can elevate
the brand, increase their income, and reclaim their time. Join
me and guest experts as we share our transparent journeys,
work smart, not hard, strategies, and the behind the scenes
of running a successful brand in business. You're tuned in
to the Self Life CEO. What's up, everybody? Welcome to
(00:55):
another episode. I'm super excited because I have my girl
to see. I hear who is a former founder of Clear,
a tech startup offering compliance software for the children industry,
and in addition to her thriving startup, to See as
a confidence in dating coach and a beauty and fragrance
influencer who has reached over one hundred million social media accounts,
going viral for her unique perspective on dating and relationships.
(01:18):
You may have seen her on owns Ready to Love
Season five, and she is here to share her journey
of going viral from two hundred thousand to over half
a million followers. Y'all, we are talking the good, the bad,
and the ugly. So first to seea thank you so
much for being here.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Thank you huh so excited.
Speaker 4 (01:39):
Girl.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
I have been able to witness firsthand how crazy of
a growth story you have, and I only know what
you've told me, and from what you've told me, there
are so many things that obviously the people from the
outside looking in just would not know. So before we
jump into the craziness of going viral and your crazy growth,
let's just first start with your overall entrepreneurial journey. Give
(02:03):
us all the tea of where you've been, where you're.
Speaker 4 (02:05):
Going, and everything to see you.
Speaker 3 (02:08):
So, first of all, I have I'm chicagoan.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
So I went to DePaul and I got my master's
at the University of Texas at Austin, so I studied
psychology and then the African diasporaus so media theory. I
went to both colleges on scholarship, and I really kind
of hail from corporate America, and I'm a market researcher
by trade, and so basically I taught companies basically how
(02:33):
to understand their consumer so that you know, we would
do the research of who is more likely to buy something.
So now I guess it's interesting now to be where
it's like, who is more likely to like my content
or buy into my content?
Speaker 3 (02:47):
So things come full circle.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
If you were to have told me then, I really
didn't know that it would connect to what I'm you know,
what I'm doing now. So that's kind of just like
my baseline story. After grad school, I went into work
for like all these ad agencies and things in New
York and it was the most unfulfilling work I've ever
done in my life. You never knew your managers, you
(03:09):
never knew where the report was going. It was so boring,
and I just felt like, this is not my purpose.
And so someone once asked me, like what would you
do for free? Like what would you do if you
never got paid for? And I was like, I want
to go help the kids, like the young kids, so
they can know that they don't have to like stay
in the hood. And that's what I did, y'all. I
worked in the roughest schools in Chicago. I'm talking about
(03:32):
kids were bringing guns. It was metal detectors at the
front door that some of them like broken household.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
They were only coming to.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
School to eat, they were ditching school. It was high
truancy rates. The parents were even a task, Like the
only times they would come up to the school is
when they kids weren't going to prom.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
And it's like, ma'am, I called you five times before.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
This baby was feeling okay, like now he ain't going
to prom, and you up in here throwing the fit
and trying to fight the staff. So that's kind of
like where I help from. I moved to DC almost
ten years ago. I did education here, so I worked
in DC public schools. I was also a region director
for Enrichment programs across the city and then I was like,
(04:13):
I'm tired of this COVID hit. In twenty twenty, I
was working in higher education and I basically said to myself,
after the job was being the company was being acquired
by another school, so Texas and them, they came in
and acquired our school, and I said, I wasn't going back.
I thought it was like God's way of telling me, like,
(04:34):
this is your way out. So they closed and I
never went back. They offered me a role, but I
never I never went back, So I just started thugging
it out. I started a tech startup for the childcare industry.
I was already a consultant for the childcare industry, and
I audited daycares for the government and I recently just
cycled out of that. Also, So life is life is
(04:57):
a you know, an interesting thing. But yeah, I just
I'm a passionate person. I have to love what I do.
I can't be bored for too long and I can't
be unfulfilled for a very long time. And so I've
always just been a gutsy person. I just feel like
it's my world. Whatever I want to do, I'm gonna
do it. You know like I never have been a
(05:18):
scary person, which is funny because I think it has
led into my interpersonal relationships. In my art of detachment,
I don't feel attached to anything people place or think.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Okay, like I'm out of here. I'm like, baby, this
ain't serving me. I got to go.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
And so I think that that has been like a
strength and a superpower of mine.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
And now I'm kind of like trying to settle down
some Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
I would have never thought meeting you, and I mean
even when you told me about it, I was like, huh.
It was kind of trying to connect like a different
version of you that I didn't know.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
Because I met you as to see the influencer.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
And I don't know if I have talked to you
about this, but I went to school for early education,
so like that was.
Speaker 4 (05:58):
My first time.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I love the kiddos and I always thought I was
going to be a teacher.
Speaker 4 (06:04):
So we have that in common.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
In such a short amount of time, You've lived so
many different lives already, so it's really crazy.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
I'm like, who am I? But yeah, I will.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
But I think I wish more people would take risks
like that, Like you don't have to be in no job,
and I think, I don't know if that's a millennial thing.
Maybe it's like a young young generation thing, but it's
so many I wish I would say, like if something
tragic happened TOMORROWL like, at least I wasn't scared to jump, baby,
I ain't staying. No, you know, I didn't stay in
(06:33):
something that I didn't want to do. And I think that,
like that is like one of my proudest things about
my life story is that I didn't. I wasn't ever
scared to jump. And that's the thing like people think,
like you jump into something greater. No, I jumped into poverty.
I jumped into being on food stamps. I jumped into
(06:53):
like almost getting you bigta out of my apartment. I
legit had a red slip on my apartment. So the
jump ain't not always cute, But.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
I was scared.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
At least, though, girl, I was going down to the
EBT office with a Louis Va tambag because that's how
I had. I had literally girl worked my way left
my six figure salary and was struggling, like I didn't
know quite what I was gonna do, and people, I
don't think people. People just knew me for being like
well put together, but I was like, y'all, I literally
(07:23):
cannot pay my bills, but I figured it out. So
the jumping are always pretty, but yeah, don't be scared
to jump.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
So at what point in your journey did you kind
of say like, oh, oh, I think I'm gonna be
like a brand and I think, you know, this social
media thing influencing and just like growing your audience and
people loving you for you, not what you do.
Speaker 4 (07:46):
Like when in your journey did that start to happen?
Speaker 1 (07:50):
So, you know what the funniest thing about when it
came to like love and relationships, I started to get
these memories on Facebook and I was talking about relationship
ships fourteen years ago. Facebook reminded me as a memory
that I was talking about relationships fourteen years ago. When
I was living in New York. I would like have
these tales and people would follow them. I'd be like, oh,
(08:11):
the trash men. It would be like the guy I
met on the two train, and I would like tell
these stories and I would have these like anthems of.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
Like what you should and shouldn't do.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
I didn't know, like at that time, I was just
like ranting, but I didn't know that that was gonna
kind of become a thing. And then my mom passed away,
and I was like, yo, it gotta get real good
down here. I'm on my way out of here, Like literally,
I was like life has to be good, like this
gotta be good for me to stay here, because at
that point my mom passed, I had already lost my dad,
(08:41):
and I just was like, who the hell dealt these cars?
Can we curves on here? Because I was like, who
help these cars?
Speaker 2 (08:47):
Like?
Speaker 3 (08:48):
Who dealt these cars?
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Because what happened to like all these like great families
and your grandparents are like so sweet. I just like
I never got any of the cards that people were
so but my parents hadn't been They were married, but
it was kind of like a crazy marriage. Like my
grandparents weren't as like nurturing and enduring. My sister and
I were like completely different. So sometimes I felt like
I grew up with no sibling, but I did have
(09:11):
a sibling, So I was like who dealt these cars?
Speaker 3 (09:14):
And I just felt like life had.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
To be really it had to get really good for me,
and I like I sobbed on my pillow and I
was like, Lord, tell me, what is it that you
want me to do? Literally, the next day, I started
recording videos in my car and I looked. I looked
at hot mess. My hair was all over my head,
and people like the shade room started picking up picking
it up on site, started picking it up, and I
(09:36):
was just like, wow, Like, women are hurting, women need this,
Women are looking for somebody to shepherd them through these
breakups and these knuckleheads and these like heartbreaks and all
types of stuff. And that's kind of that's kind of
where I landed on it. I got such a great
response from women who had experienced the same things that
(09:57):
I was talking.
Speaker 3 (09:58):
About, So that's how I got there.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
What was crazy is that you were sitting on your couch.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
I was in your living room with you, and we
were talking about your Instagram and you told me you
was like, Brie, I'm about to switch it up. You
was like, I need to figure out like what things,
what things are going to essentially move the needle.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
And you were talking about some changes.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
That you were going to make on your social and
things that you were paying attention to and looking at
different analytics and how certain things you know, give better
results and you had grown by like almost fifty percent.
I was like, this is crazy. She was just telling
me about all these things. So I want you to
take us back to that couch moment one of the
key things that you felt like you did that allowed
you to start seeing those results.
Speaker 3 (10:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
So the first part of that, I recognized that it
sounds crazy, but I was trying to professionalize my page.
I had this like beauty brand thing that I was doing,
and I wanted to pick up like brand deals and
I was like, I need aesthetic. I need aesthetic. I
needed to look good. But then I recognized that people
(11:03):
were buying me. They were not buying really what I
was selling or what like the pretty parts of it
right matters of the heart. They wanted it good, bad
or ugly.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
Get my free training from Hustler to Soft Life CEO,
which includes my untold Entrepreneurial Journey, the Soft Life CEO
road Map, am I winning recipe for elevating your brand,
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Speaker 1 (11:28):
I went back to my iPhone and literally, I'm sitting
here with a fourteen hundred dollars camera, and I literally
went and bought another lens. Like, I literally went bought
another lens. So that wone cost me nine hundred dollars, right,
And they wanted they wanted iPhone content, They wanted content
of me in my car, and it just it was
more relatable. And sometimes you have to know what is
(11:51):
your preferred delivery for your audience in that niche, right,
Like I felt like people people will listen to you
telling them how to get over a breakup. You could
be in a trash can, like, they don't care where
you are. You could be in your car, you could
be in a grocery store. It's just something relatable that
speaks to people, right, versus something like beauty or whatever.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
Maybe they do.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
Want it to be a little bit more setic because
they're like, Okay, well why would I buy a lip
gloss or something from someone with a dirty bathroom or
that isn't kept up herself, right, But matters of the heart,
they don't you. They'll take it from anything. And actually
the same thing with like cooking videos. I'm not sure
if you ever noticed that. So some of the things
that I recognized about my content and my delivery was
(12:38):
that like I said one day, were buying me and
my personality and my experience in the way that I delivered.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
There are so.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Many relationship coaches on the internet, but it's really about
your delivery and how you speak to your audience, right,
And so I changed my bio a few times. But
at first it was like straight talk or relationship advice.
The second one it was like big sister relationship advice,
and more so was like, hey, y'all, I'm delivering it
(13:07):
to y'all straight cut and raw it kind of and
you'll be surprised that, like the world really wants just
like a slap in the face. Do you ever remember
like Simon Powell and American Idol when he was like
the mean one and like people were like, yeah, tell
him he k sing like he sounds terrible. That's what
we need, right, Like people are actually attracted to like
(13:28):
a wake up call and the truth, you know, And
I think that that is kind of where my audience fell.
They were like, yo, I know I shouldn't be dating
this person, but tell me that it's wrong and it's
messed up. And so that's kind of what I stuck with.
The second thing I recognized and I actually learned this
from another influencer. Is that if you just go to
(13:50):
your page from someone else's page or another page that
you have, and you click that little like recommended pages,
who is being recommended to you? That means that if
I go on my page and I put like recommended
that I follow, guess what Auntie Shearer were gonna come
up Miss Sprinkle Sprinkle and all of these other dating coaches,
(14:11):
and she sold me.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
She said, if you go.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
To that thing and like people that are not in
your niche are not popping up, You're not your seo
is off, people are less likely to find you. So
I started putting keywords in my bio like relationship coach,
dating coach, like relationship advice, because that was bringing me
up on the pages of people that were seeking that information.
(14:35):
I think that that fundamentally was a game changer for
me because it put me in the category of people
that seek out that type of stuff, you know, like
whether it's relationships, matters of the heart. So I think
that that really changed the game for me. And literally
doesn't matter what your niche is, if you are a
business owner, if you are a motivational coach, whatever it is, consistency. Consistency.
(15:01):
It doesn't matter if you're selling bottles of water on
the internet. Okay, if they know you the water girl,
that's it right. The people always say people have to
know what are they coming to your page for? And
when people have asked me to kind of help them
with their pages, it's like, what are people coming here for?
Like my friends, Oh, you're a gospel singer?
Speaker 3 (15:21):
Okay? Great? That people?
Speaker 1 (15:22):
You know that girl that's on the internet, you know,
singing songs about the Lord whatever it is?
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Right?
Speaker 1 (15:27):
You know that girl that's a teaching women how to
fix your credit in thirty days?
Speaker 3 (15:32):
What you are that girl or that god that does? What?
If people don't know what they're coming to your page
for you, it will slow your growth? Right.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
Even I know that there's women on the internet that
are curvy girls that I can go to when I
want to buy a new bra or a swimsuit, because
that is what they do. I know, I'm going, Oh,
that's the curvy girl that I know, gonna show me
what outfits I can wear?
Speaker 3 (15:57):
What are you that girl or God?
Speaker 1 (15:59):
For that and itself will really kind of change the
game for you. So those are things not implemented.
Speaker 4 (16:05):
You know.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
I think sometimes as a creators or just as women,
people have an issue at putting themselves in a box.
Speaker 4 (16:11):
And that's one of.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
The hardest things that I have as a coach when
women come to me and they're like, I don't want
I don't want to be boxing, I don't want to
just do this, I want to do this in that
And it's like, well, you do have to be as
t see it just shared in some sort of box,
in a lane that at least allows you to show
up as a as an expert in your industry. And
if you can't be placed in an industry, then we're
(16:33):
kind of missing the mark. So I think that that
makes so much sense. I think too, and I would
love for us to have a conversation outside of the podcast.
But one of the things I've been struggling with in
this new journey of the soft life and starting a
family and you know, having a brand manager but not
really wanting to do like brand deals and trying to
figure out like what's comfortable is I'm in this season
(16:54):
of transition and that can be hard because then.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
It's like, well, which box do I tick? You know?
Speaker 2 (17:00):
So that's really great advice, and I think even the
thing that you mentioned about consistency when we talk about
as you know, there's so many different social media platforms
and being consistent. What has been your method for being
consistent on Instagram but also flowing your content into other
platforms as well? Because you're also on TikTok you started
(17:21):
a YouTube channel, Like, what has been your experience with
kind of like repurposing content or allowing it to live
in multiple spaces.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Yeah, I found that people will find me on different
platforms and that different platforms they're different, and I think
if you understand they're different and their purpose, that will
get you so much further. Instagram is really it's a
millennials playground period, point in the blank. And it also
(17:51):
is people care what it looks like TikTok.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
You can go on TikTok.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
With a bonding on your head eating fried chicken. Nobody cares.
They don't care, they don't care. It's just so much
of an easier audience. You also can find it's more
of a storytelling type of vibe on TikTok or YouTube
versus Instagram, where it's more short form and the platform
(18:16):
is actually favoring short form content. TikTok, Hell, we watch
What's the Girl Resa Tisa, we watched we watched the
whole Netflix documentary. Basically that's what it felt like, and
we just kept coming back, you know, kept coming back
to it because it's more of a like storytelling kind
of app. And I also feel like TikTok and YouTube
(18:36):
are also we call like TikTok University YouTube University.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
It's a great place to learn and study as well.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
And so just knowing what each what each platform is
good for, and what their audience is utilizing the platform for.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
Yeah, thank you for sharing that. MAYA next question for
you is what changes did you experience right away when
your followers jumped from the two hundred to the five
hundred K. And I know it wasn't like an overnight thing,
but you kind of did kind of wake up one
day it was like, whoa it is you? Every time
you look back at your phone, it's growing. What were
some of the main changes that you experienced while that
(19:17):
growth is happening.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
I was in over my the valume, the valuume right
the valume of my DMS.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
That was a big thing, and also.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
That I needed to automate stuff like I was immediately
on mini chat because guess what, I cannot I cannot
respond to everybody.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
I just can't.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
I think the valume and like putting systems in place.
At first it was like, okay, this for play play,
this is cute. This is my account. It's me talking
to y'all. Now it's like, do I need an assistant
to like fake be me and reply to these people?
Do I need to automate these Do I need a
link to be sent to your DM? So immediately the
valume pushed me into automation, like I have to have
(20:07):
systems in place now to be able to accommodate my audience.
And it's worked pretty well, like many chats I do,
because I'll put like comment joined to join my secret
grows chat or something, and I'll get so many joins
that Instagram will flag my account because it thinks it's
like spam. Wow, I have to like waited that I
(20:28):
can't comment back and things like that. It gets kind
of weird, but it's a good thing. It's a good
thing to it's a high class problem. It's what I
it's a high class problem. So that was honestly, the
immediate change was like I need to automate. I need
help now, like what could I do to lighten my
(20:49):
load a little bit? And then honestly, I'm such a
like low key I think myself to be a humble person,
but also just like more people recognizing me, and that
has been adjustment.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Like now just like my everyday Sunday day party, it's.
Speaker 4 (21:06):
Like are you that girl that?
Speaker 1 (21:07):
And I'm like, oh wow, this is like a thing now,
which also spills into your dating because I'm not necessarily
telling the guys that I'm dating that it's a thing
and it's my job. And then now I'm out and
people may want to take pictures. They're like, oh my god,
can I tag you?
Speaker 3 (21:24):
Oh my god?
Speaker 1 (21:25):
And so that can be a little interesting, which is
a really a weird place to meet, because I really
find myself to be such a background kind of girl.
So yeah, the valume pushed me into automation and just
like accepting my new position in life.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:41):
So with all of those, those are all like logistical things.
Let's talk about mental when all of this was happening,
the growth coming out of nowhere. Because you've seen growth,
You've seen like consistent growth over time. But I think
with this it was it was crazy. I mean, you
doubled your following in such a short time. Mentally, what
(22:02):
did that do for you? And let's talk mental health
in terms of how we associate our existence in regards
to who we are on social media and you know
it's this little phone has a lot of.
Speaker 4 (22:12):
Power in it. What did that do to you from
a mental standpoint?
Speaker 1 (22:16):
Yeah, I think that. I think we've talked about this before.
Breathe like, just like you can be you know, the
shadow banning is a real thing. The being stagnant and
being stuck and like trying to figure out. Then you
feel like a puppet where he's like, well, what is
it they want versus what I want to do versus
what they want me to do?
Speaker 3 (22:33):
And so you kind of get stuck in that.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
But I feel like when I started to see the
return on what I was doing, I was.
Speaker 3 (22:42):
Like, bet say less Like that's how I felt.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
I felt like seriously, I felt like, yeah, now I'm
glad y'all finally see it.
Speaker 3 (22:50):
Like now I felt like I got my spot, I
got what I deserved, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
And again, I don't compare myself to other people but
I feel like people can't do what you could do,
how you could do it, and.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
That's just that.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
And so I felt like I finally started getting my
flowers from shit to my baby. I've been on this
internet every morning, every morning, trying to tell y'all you know,
and I finally felt like, Okay, whoever released me out
of Instagram jail, thank you so much. But now it's showtime.
And I really felt like I'm not gonna let this,
you know, pass me by. I wanted to celebrate little
(23:25):
miles thoughts. I celebrated two fifty. I celebrated y'all do
three three hundred. Yes, I remember being a GZ concert.
I celebrated three hundred. You all celebrated my four fifty like,
oh my gosh, like it was. I was like, wow, no,
you gotta celebrate these small wins. So I feel like
from my mental health it won. It felt like life
is getting good down here because like my work is
(23:47):
paying off, and my work wasn't dependent on any anything
but me getting what I felt like my work paid
off for, right, Like that's really all I want. I
didn't want, you know, recognition or anything. I'm just like, hey,
they say that this is the blueprint to grow and
scale on Instagram and to get I'm doing those things?
Why am I not reaping the return? So that that
(24:09):
just put me in a mental space of like, yeah,
it's showtime. Like I feel like it put that dog
in me, like yeah, like now I know that I
can stand toe to toe with everybody else and yeah,
that's it gave me like a mental boost, but it
also gave me a heavier crown because people are dependent
(24:32):
on you. We went for your birthday trip to Mexico
and people was like, where are you at girl? Where
you ain't been on it? And I'm like, I'm on vacation.
Maybe you should go on one, Like I'm on vacation, baby, girl,
Like I can't. Like my whole life is a dedicated
to you, you know, but I think that it is
a lot of pressure. And also like people are mean.
(24:53):
The Internet is a mean place, and people would especially
talking about matters of the opposite sex and like you know,
men versus women and all that whole like Red Peel
Podcast debate, Like men will get in your comments and
call you fat, ugly dirty, Like how could you dare
demand this stuff when you ain't nothing but a six anyway,
like it.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Can get really mean, And yeah, I think I I felt.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
Like I had lived my life in the back so
much that I was willing to take what was coming
to me to really kind of live in my purpose,
you know, because it's actually what I prayed for.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
So yeah, yeah, And I wanted to ask you because
with all of the recognition, you know, also comes the criticism.
And you had mentioned when we did your celebration brunch,
you were so emotional and you were just like, y'all
have no idea, like all the things that it's like, yes,
these numbers are great, but also I've been getting so
(25:53):
much criticism and just mean messages.
Speaker 4 (25:55):
How did you.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Handle that criticism and that came along with you go viral?
Speaker 4 (26:01):
Are you ready to go from hustler to soft liafe CEO?
I'm here to help.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
I've created the Soft Life Society, a membership based community
where I provide weekly events such as group coaching calls,
brand and social media audits, masterclasses, and featured guest speakers.
Speaker 4 (26:15):
Get access to.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Members only in person events, and discounts on soft Life
CEO services.
Speaker 4 (26:19):
And here's the best part. You can join today for free.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Visit the softlafe, Ceo dot com, Backslash Society and use
code free trial for thirty days free access.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
Well, I had already had a taste of that because
I did a reality television show that was based off
of dating, and that was the first time that I
was number one on national television, but also coined as
plus size. I hadn't I'm like baby, my family from Mississippi,
Chicago via Mississippi. Everybody looked like this. But I didn't
(26:54):
realize the beauty standards, you know, like, even though I'm
a consumer of beauty, I didn't realize that the industry
of Hollywood and television, that it was a real thing.
So then I was coined as this like plus sized
girl who wasn't secure with herself, and that was really
hard on me mentally. So I had already kind of
(27:15):
had a little taste of that. That gave me a
little thicker skin. But also in the space of social media,
sometimes most of the time, engagement is good no matter
what people are talking about, as long as they're talking.
So I had to also compartmentalize things like, Okay, yeah,
they arguing in my comments, But now when a brand
(27:37):
reaches out to me, they're going to be able to
see I got fifty thousand shares, I got twenty thousand comments,
I got five hundred thousand likes, or whatever the case
may be. And so you know, yeah, thanks for the chatter,
thanks for the me and comments now Sephora or whatever it's.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
Coming to me to say, hey, can you do you know?
Speaker 1 (27:56):
And so that I was able to like section that all,
but also keeping like great people.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Around me that remind me, you know that I'm.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
A great person and a great friend, and you know,
friends that just have my back and they'll literally write
me and say don't go read those comments, like it's
just not really good for your mental health.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
So yeah, yeah, no, thank you for sharing that, because
I know that that stuff is, you know, not the
fun and pretty parts of it. But I do want
to switch gears a little bit because you have built
a really strong community and I think so many times
when people are thinking about post sing on social or
growing their following, they're not understanding.
Speaker 4 (28:36):
That you don't own this platform.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
One thing that you have done a really great job
of is creating a space for your ladies to come
and really get to experience you and have that sense
of community. Talk me through your girl's chat and what
made you create it, if there's anything you would have
done differently in creating it, and then we'll jump into
my next question.
Speaker 4 (28:56):
But let's talk about the girl's chat.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Yeah, so the girls chat, kay was birth out of
me wanting to tell women secrets of how to deal
with men off of the Internet. I was like, yo,
I really want to tell you how to get this
man to do everything that you want him to do.
But I don't want the man in our business. And
so I prayed a supergirls chat. But to my point
(29:18):
about like growth pushed me into automation. Instagram will allow
you to have subscriptions, so I started there. It went
from it first started at nine to ninety nine. I
took it up to fourteen ninety nine.
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Now it was.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
Nineteen ninety nine, right demand God is good. But I
took that and Instagram only allows the chat for twenty
eight days. Can you imagine restarting your chat every twenty
eight days? Like it was so annoying. We couldn't put
the same type of media and things like that in there,
like share voice notes and stuff like that. And I
(29:52):
ended up taking it from there. I looked at Slack
Slack was an option, and then like What's App was
another option, and so I had run my course on Instagram.
It just wasn't the best place. And also people were like, oh,
I'm trying to join and I'm on the waiting list,
and I was just like, Okay, this is too much,
and so I moved it to What's App and I
(30:12):
use my subscription through stand Store, so I'm also able
to have an automated email, so like once they subscribe
from stand Store, they'll get the link to the What's
App chat and then they'll be able to join there.
So it really takes time to figure out, but honestly,
it's just been like growth has been pushing me to
different revenues to be able to accommodate the growth.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
So now it's like.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
One hundred ors maybe one hundred and fifty or so
women on Instagram that are subscribed, and then the other
ones are it's like six hundred of them from What's
App at like twenty dollars a month, So that wow, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (30:50):
That is so amazing.
Speaker 2 (30:52):
Yeah, I think the like, my the first thing I
always tell somebody is like, if you have a large audience,
you got to get them into a community. Got to
get them somewhere else where you have immedia access to them.
And as you grow and as you switch platforms and think,
you know, these people will come with you, like it's
it doesn't just live on Instagram. So I love that
you've done that. And then even when you think about
(31:13):
the margin of profit that you can make when you
decide the price of something what that includes, and even
you know, getting to a point where you have different
membership tiers, right, you might have a twenty dollars which
is like the basic community, but then you got the
one hundred dollars a month where you get the community
plus these extra coaching calls or you know, sister circles
things like that, so you can really grow and excel.
(31:35):
So I'm glad that we were able to talk about
the community. Cause girl, yeah, when we were at the
Cavo trip, I know your girls is like, okay, where's
our stuff? We were, I know, to see what pulls
her phone out and she's like, if you hain't on.
Speaker 5 (31:48):
A trip, that is so funny, so funny, But you're
about lo key, I've learned about communities by it's so funny.
Speaker 1 (31:59):
I'm sure you know be simoned like that she has
millions of followers, and she started charging people to be
in her close friends and she was like, I go
off the line and then I have people sign up
there and my team is manually adding people to my
only to my my what do you call it?
Speaker 3 (32:19):
Close friends? Close friends that they were adding people to closer.
I was like, that's genius.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
I didn't feel like I had the following then to
do it, but I kept it as a mental note.
I was like, Okay, bet, if I ever get a
huge following enough where I feel like girls are coming
back and they really want to be I'll take it
off line. And that was honestly one of the best
decisions that I could have made, is like take it
off line and then being able to like tier tier
(32:46):
off those categories of the chat, like it's some really
big entrepreneurs that's like, y'all, you can you can sell
merch you can sell courses, you can sell like and
I was just like, Okay, yeah, this is what I
need to do. I need to start selling courses making
a community and that has been like a big, a
big growth thing for me as well.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
Yeah, no, that's amazing, So I do want to ask
you for those listening who maybe they've been doing all
the things right, they're doing their version of being consistent,
and they're getting to the point of burnout or losing
motivation to keep going. Because this is something that you
have experienced, right, doing all the things and not seeing
(33:28):
the immediate results.
Speaker 4 (33:29):
What advice would you give to those people who are
in that space right now? Guess what your girl is?
Speaker 2 (33:34):
Finally, on YouTube, I'm posting weekly content including behind the
scenes of my self life, all things entrepreneurship, and the
journey of my husband and I starting our family. Head
over to YouTube and subscribe to my channel, Brianna Ponte,
the Self Life CEO.
Speaker 1 (33:48):
Imagine if you stop and you were gonna hit it,
like you can't stop, Like imagine if you stop before
like you have to keep going. And one there's nothing
new under the but like, sometimes you don't get the
benefit of your like that you don't reap the benefits immediately,
And that's just not a social media lesson, that's a
(34:09):
lesson for life. Sometimes you don't get the reward immediately,
and it is such a great lesson and honestly, almost
every champion in this world has that same story about
how they were trying and trying and trying and trying
to do it and they almost gave up and they
did it and look at them, right. That is a
(34:30):
lifelong trope of anybody that ever won something.
Speaker 3 (34:33):
So it's just like.
Speaker 1 (34:35):
You, even if you feel burned out, you can restrategize,
you can redirect, but you can't stop. You have to
you have to keep at it so that. I know
that sounds a little cliche, like keep going, don't stop,
keep going, but it will aid you in so many
other categories of your life when you realize that, Like
sometimes it's not stop. You know, it's not that you're
(34:57):
not gonna get it. It's just like a redirection or strategizing,
but you gotta keep your head in the game.
Speaker 3 (35:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:03):
Absolutely, So I want to wrap up the episode with
a little behind the scenes. I want to see to
take us through what a typical week looks like and
how now running a social media page that gets so
much engagement with all the things considered, email, your community,
content creation, your DMS, and you're just day to day life,
(35:26):
what does that look like and how are you managing
it all?
Speaker 1 (35:30):
I wish that I had some beautiful story to tell y'all.
Speaker 3 (35:35):
I am a raggedy content creator. Baby.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Don't look to me. Don't look to me for no
type of organization. I'm not the I am up in
a morning, the batch content thing.
Speaker 3 (35:45):
It's shameful.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
I wish I could batch content create, and I'm just
not there yet.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
I will record on my phone in the morning. Don't
don't do that, y'all.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
I will record on my phone in the morning, I'll
edit in a morning, I'll put it out and I'll
have four five hours downtime. And I was like, you know,
this could be a great time to be recording a video, right,
and I won't do it. And then here comes my
posting time. I'm like, you better get your butt out
this bed and do it.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
But I don't. I always will do it.
Speaker 1 (36:12):
But I have done like periods of time where I
have batch content created, and it is the oh my,
the freedom and not having to be pressed for your
content that day, that you have something that you recorded
a week or a month ago that you can put
out right. That is just really the freedom of work smarter,
not harder. I'm still working hard, y'all. I ain't got
(36:33):
to the work and smarter part. But I will say
that batch content creating is a really big thing, and
I wish that. I wish that upon me, Like I
need to get there to that, to that point. But
also like now I have like brand deals and things
like that, Like I just had two deliverables this week
where you have to like send over the script then
they want to see you like your first rendition of
(36:54):
the of the of the video and things like that.
So I do do those things ahead time. But honestly, y'all,
if I ain't had no brand deal, I'll probably still
raggedy creating.
Speaker 3 (37:04):
So I have just more so.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
Goals that I want for my life, you know, goals
that I want for content creating. But I wish I
had like a pretty old story to tell y'all about. Yo, mondays,
I do this and my assistant does that, and then
we we brainstorm. I ain't gotta no, I'm still I'm
still look but maybe I need to come up to
your apartment, Breed. We can talk about how you can
look get me, me and my brand together. But I
(37:28):
gotta do better. I have to do better.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
But you know, I love that because I do feel
like so often when we do these interviews, there are
these very like, you know, pretty schedules, and this is
what I do. And it's nice to know that at
the end of the day, you can be getting really
great results, and you can be doing really great things,
and you can be out here doing it in a
very untraditional, unplanned way and it still works at the
(37:51):
end of the day. What you're doing is you're waking
up and you're choosing to do it even when you don't.
Speaker 4 (37:54):
Necessarily feel like it.
Speaker 2 (37:55):
And you know, some girls just aren't planners too, Like,
there are women out there.
Speaker 1 (37:59):
Who like, don't give me anxiety them gus. My friends
have given me journals and journals and planners and they're
all stacked up collecting does I'm not a journal girl.
I'm not a It actually gives me anxiety and it
triggers my ADHD as well. And you would think that
planning would relieve you of some of those things, but
(38:20):
even the idea of planning ahead actually gives me anxiety.
So I just thugging it out. But don't do that job.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
Don't be likely to each to each of those Whatever
works for you is what works for you.
Speaker 4 (38:32):
So before we wrap up, just let us know what
things you have going on. What are you working on?
What can we expect in the future.
Speaker 3 (38:40):
Yes, so a couple of things.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
Number One, please join my super Girls Chat, so subscribe there.
You can get that from my Instagram. There's a link
a link on my Instagram or any of my posts.
You can come and join and it will send you
to a link to my secret girls Chat. We use
what's app as a platform.
Speaker 3 (39:01):
What else am I doing?
Speaker 1 (39:03):
Also working on just like some merch and pop up events,
So that's gonna be good. I'm gonna be kind of
like going on tour, like doing some singles, mixers, dating
type of events and things like that with merch included.
And then lastly, I'm going to be on Tonight's Conversation,
(39:23):
which is a big thing. So I'm gonna be on
their live show in DC and in Baltimore.
Speaker 3 (39:29):
So that was that. That is I'm really excited about that.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
That was actually something that I manifested and it's actually
on my screen saver to be a part of that platform,
and they invited me for their podcast, but then they
called me back for the live show, So I'm excited.
I think I told you that breeze that just happened
a day or two ago. But yes, so yes, good
things are happening. Good things are happening.
Speaker 4 (39:52):
That is so awesome.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
Yeah, I'm just like I said, I am a bystander
witnessing the growth and all the blessings that have.
Speaker 4 (39:58):
Come your way and out.
Speaker 2 (39:59):
It is all all due to your hard work and
consistency in the times where the results weren't showing up.
So I'm just super proud of you and I'm very
grateful to be able to call you a friend. So girl,
thank you so much for your time. I know that
the girls are gonna love this one. This is our
first episode on anything viral related, so again, thank you
so much.
Speaker 4 (40:19):
For being here.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
Thank you, this was awesome.
Speaker 4 (40:23):
Thanks for tuning in to Soft Life CEO.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
I hope that today's episode gets you a little bit
closer to achieving your definition of a soft life. If
you're ready to start the journey from hustler to soft
life CEO, go to the Soft Life ceo dot com Backslash.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
Society for a thirty day free trial in my coaching community.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
If you found this episode helpful, share it with a friend,
leave a review, and don't forget to subscribe.
Imagine if you stop and you were gonna hit it,
you have to keep going sometimes that you don't reap
the benefits immediately. And that's just not a social media lesson,
that's a lesson for life.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Hey, I'm Brianna Aponte, your host of the Self Life
CEO podcast. I dropped out of college at the age
of nineteen to start my first business. I worked seven
days a week, wore way too many hats, and was
the true definition of a hustler. Years later, I'm finally
living the dream that I worked so hard to make
my reality. I've transitioned from a hustler to a soft
life CEO, working only two days a week to maintain
(00:33):
and run a high earning business that gives me the
freedom to live a life I love. Now, it's my
mission to help as many entrepreneurs as I can elevate
the brand, increase their income, and reclaim their time. Join
me and guest experts as we share our transparent journeys,
work smart, not hard, strategies, and the behind the scenes
of running a successful brand in business. You're tuned in
to the Self Life CEO. What's up, everybody? Welcome to
(00:55):
another episode. I'm super excited because I have my girl
to see. I hear who is a former founder of Clear,
a tech startup offering compliance software for the children industry,
and in addition to her thriving startup, to See as
a confidence in dating coach and a beauty and fragrance
influencer who has reached over one hundred million social media accounts,
going viral for her unique perspective on dating and relationships.
(01:18):
You may have seen her on owns Ready to Love
Season five, and she is here to share her journey
of going viral from two hundred thousand to over half
a million followers. Y'all, we are talking the good, the bad,
and the ugly. So first to seea thank you so
much for being here.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Thank you huh so excited.
Speaker 4 (01:39):
Girl.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
I have been able to witness firsthand how crazy of
a growth story you have, and I only know what
you've told me, and from what you've told me, there
are so many things that obviously the people from the
outside looking in just would not know. So before we
jump into the craziness of going viral and your crazy growth,
let's just first start with your overall entrepreneurial journey. Give
(02:03):
us all the tea of where you've been, where you're.
Speaker 4 (02:05):
Going, and everything to see you.
Speaker 3 (02:08):
So, first of all, I have I'm chicagoan.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
So I went to DePaul and I got my master's
at the University of Texas at Austin, so I studied
psychology and then the African diasporaus so media theory. I
went to both colleges on scholarship, and I really kind
of hail from corporate America, and I'm a market researcher
by trade, and so basically I taught companies basically how
(02:33):
to understand their consumer so that you know, we would
do the research of who is more likely to buy something.
So now I guess it's interesting now to be where
it's like, who is more likely to like my content
or buy into my content?
Speaker 3 (02:47):
So things come full circle.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
If you were to have told me then, I really
didn't know that it would connect to what I'm you know,
what I'm doing now. So that's kind of just like
my baseline story. After grad school, I went into work
for like all these ad agencies and things in New
York and it was the most unfulfilling work I've ever
done in my life. You never knew your managers, you
(03:09):
never knew where the report was going. It was so boring,
and I just felt like, this is not my purpose.
And so someone once asked me, like what would you
do for free? Like what would you do if you
never got paid for? And I was like, I want
to go help the kids, like the young kids, so
they can know that they don't have to like stay
in the hood. And that's what I did, y'all. I
worked in the roughest schools in Chicago. I'm talking about
(03:32):
kids were bringing guns. It was metal detectors at the
front door that some of them like broken household.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
They were only coming to.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
School to eat, they were ditching school. It was high
truancy rates. The parents were even a task, Like the
only times they would come up to the school is
when they kids weren't going to prom.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
And it's like, ma'am, I called you five times before.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
This baby was feeling okay, like now he ain't going
to prom, and you up in here throwing the fit
and trying to fight the staff. So that's kind of
like where I help from. I moved to DC almost
ten years ago. I did education here, so I worked
in DC public schools. I was also a region director
for Enrichment programs across the city and then I was like,
(04:13):
I'm tired of this COVID hit. In twenty twenty, I
was working in higher education and I basically said to myself,
after the job was being the company was being acquired
by another school, so Texas and them, they came in
and acquired our school, and I said, I wasn't going back.
I thought it was like God's way of telling me, like,
(04:34):
this is your way out. So they closed and I
never went back. They offered me a role, but I
never I never went back, So I just started thugging
it out. I started a tech startup for the childcare industry.
I was already a consultant for the childcare industry, and
I audited daycares for the government and I recently just
cycled out of that. Also, So life is life is
(04:57):
a you know, an interesting thing. But yeah, I just
I'm a passionate person. I have to love what I do.
I can't be bored for too long and I can't
be unfulfilled for a very long time. And so I've
always just been a gutsy person. I just feel like
it's my world. Whatever I want to do, I'm gonna
do it. You know like I never have been a
(05:18):
scary person, which is funny because I think it has
led into my interpersonal relationships. In my art of detachment,
I don't feel attached to anything people place or think.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Okay, like I'm out of here. I'm like, baby, this
ain't serving me. I got to go.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
And so I think that that has been like a
strength and a superpower of mine.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
And now I'm kind of like trying to settle down
some Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
I would have never thought meeting you, and I mean
even when you told me about it, I was like, huh.
It was kind of trying to connect like a different
version of you that I didn't know.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
Because I met you as to see the influencer.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
And I don't know if I have talked to you
about this, but I went to school for early education,
so like that was.
Speaker 4 (05:58):
My first time.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I love the kiddos and I always thought I was
going to be a teacher.
Speaker 4 (06:04):
So we have that in common.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
In such a short amount of time, You've lived so
many different lives already, so it's really crazy.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
I'm like, who am I? But yeah, I will.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
But I think I wish more people would take risks
like that, Like you don't have to be in no job,
and I think, I don't know if that's a millennial thing.
Maybe it's like a young young generation thing, but it's
so many I wish I would say, like if something
tragic happened TOMORROWL like, at least I wasn't scared to jump, baby,
I ain't staying. No, you know, I didn't stay in
(06:33):
something that I didn't want to do. And I think that,
like that is like one of my proudest things about
my life story is that I didn't. I wasn't ever
scared to jump. And that's the thing like people think,
like you jump into something greater. No, I jumped into poverty.
I jumped into being on food stamps. I jumped into
(06:53):
like almost getting you bigta out of my apartment. I
legit had a red slip on my apartment. So the
jump ain't not always cute, But.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
I was scared.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
At least, though, girl, I was going down to the
EBT office with a Louis Va tambag because that's how
I had. I had literally girl worked my way left
my six figure salary and was struggling, like I didn't
know quite what I was gonna do, and people, I
don't think people. People just knew me for being like
well put together, but I was like, y'all, I literally
(07:23):
cannot pay my bills, but I figured it out. So
the jumping are always pretty, but yeah, don't be scared
to jump.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
So at what point in your journey did you kind
of say like, oh, oh, I think I'm gonna be
like a brand and I think, you know, this social
media thing influencing and just like growing your audience and
people loving you for you, not what you do.
Speaker 4 (07:46):
Like when in your journey did that start to happen?
Speaker 1 (07:50):
So, you know what the funniest thing about when it
came to like love and relationships, I started to get
these memories on Facebook and I was talking about relationship
ships fourteen years ago. Facebook reminded me as a memory
that I was talking about relationships fourteen years ago. When
I was living in New York. I would like have
these tales and people would follow them. I'd be like, oh,
(08:11):
the trash men. It would be like the guy I
met on the two train, and I would like tell
these stories and I would have these like anthems of.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
Like what you should and shouldn't do.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
I didn't know, like at that time, I was just
like ranting, but I didn't know that that was gonna
kind of become a thing. And then my mom passed away,
and I was like, yo, it gotta get real good
down here. I'm on my way out of here, Like literally,
I was like life has to be good, like this
gotta be good for me to stay here, because at
that point my mom passed, I had already lost my dad,
(08:41):
and I just was like, who the hell dealt these cars?
Can we curves on here? Because I was like, who
help these cars?
Speaker 2 (08:47):
Like?
Speaker 3 (08:48):
Who dealt these cars?
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Because what happened to like all these like great families
and your grandparents are like so sweet. I just like
I never got any of the cards that people were
so but my parents hadn't been They were married, but
it was kind of like a crazy marriage. Like my
grandparents weren't as like nurturing and enduring. My sister and
I were like completely different. So sometimes I felt like
I grew up with no sibling, but I did have
(09:11):
a sibling, So I was like who dealt these cars?
Speaker 3 (09:14):
And I just felt like life had.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
To be really it had to get really good for me,
and I like I sobbed on my pillow and I
was like, Lord, tell me, what is it that you
want me to do? Literally, the next day, I started
recording videos in my car and I looked. I looked
at hot mess. My hair was all over my head,
and people like the shade room started picking up picking
it up on site, started picking it up, and I
(09:36):
was just like, wow, Like, women are hurting, women need this,
Women are looking for somebody to shepherd them through these
breakups and these knuckleheads and these like heartbreaks and all
types of stuff. And that's kind of that's kind of
where I landed on it. I got such a great
response from women who had experienced the same things that
(09:57):
I was talking.
Speaker 3 (09:58):
About, So that's how I got there.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
What was crazy is that you were sitting on your couch.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
I was in your living room with you, and we
were talking about your Instagram and you told me you
was like, Brie, I'm about to switch it up. You
was like, I need to figure out like what things,
what things are going to essentially move the needle.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
And you were talking about some changes.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
That you were going to make on your social and
things that you were paying attention to and looking at
different analytics and how certain things you know, give better
results and you had grown by like almost fifty percent.
I was like, this is crazy. She was just telling
me about all these things. So I want you to
take us back to that couch moment one of the
key things that you felt like you did that allowed
you to start seeing those results.
Speaker 3 (10:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
So the first part of that, I recognized that it
sounds crazy, but I was trying to professionalize my page.
I had this like beauty brand thing that I was doing,
and I wanted to pick up like brand deals and
I was like, I need aesthetic. I need aesthetic. I
needed to look good. But then I recognized that people
(11:03):
were buying me. They were not buying really what I
was selling or what like the pretty parts of it
right matters of the heart. They wanted it good, bad
or ugly.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
Get my free training from Hustler to Soft Life CEO,
which includes my untold Entrepreneurial Journey, the Soft Life CEO
road Map, am I winning recipe for elevating your brand,
increasing your income, and reclaiming your time. Head over to
the Soft Life CEO dot com backslash free training.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
I went back to my iPhone and literally, I'm sitting
here with a fourteen hundred dollars camera, and I literally
went and bought another lens. Like, I literally went bought
another lens. So that wone cost me nine hundred dollars, right,
And they wanted they wanted iPhone content, They wanted content
of me in my car, and it just it was
more relatable. And sometimes you have to know what is
(11:51):
your preferred delivery for your audience in that niche, right,
Like I felt like people people will listen to you
telling them how to get over a breakup. You could
be in a trash can, like, they don't care where
you are. You could be in your car, you could
be in a grocery store. It's just something relatable that
speaks to people, right, versus something like beauty or whatever.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
Maybe they do.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
Want it to be a little bit more setic because
they're like, Okay, well why would I buy a lip
gloss or something from someone with a dirty bathroom or
that isn't kept up herself, right, But matters of the heart,
they don't you. They'll take it from anything. And actually
the same thing with like cooking videos. I'm not sure
if you ever noticed that. So some of the things
that I recognized about my content and my delivery was
(12:38):
that like I said one day, were buying me and
my personality and my experience in the way that I delivered.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
There are so.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Many relationship coaches on the internet, but it's really about
your delivery and how you speak to your audience, right,
And so I changed my bio a few times. But
at first it was like straight talk or relationship advice.
The second one it was like big sister relationship advice,
and more so was like, hey, y'all, I'm delivering it
(13:07):
to y'all straight cut and raw it kind of and
you'll be surprised that, like the world really wants just
like a slap in the face. Do you ever remember
like Simon Powell and American Idol when he was like
the mean one and like people were like, yeah, tell
him he k sing like he sounds terrible. That's what
we need, right, Like people are actually attracted to like
(13:28):
a wake up call and the truth, you know, And
I think that that is kind of where my audience fell.
They were like, yo, I know I shouldn't be dating
this person, but tell me that it's wrong and it's
messed up. And so that's kind of what I stuck with.
The second thing I recognized and I actually learned this
from another influencer. Is that if you just go to
(13:50):
your page from someone else's page or another page that
you have, and you click that little like recommended pages,
who is being recommended to you? That means that if
I go on my page and I put like recommended
that I follow, guess what Auntie Shearer were gonna come
up Miss Sprinkle Sprinkle and all of these other dating coaches,
(14:11):
and she sold me.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
She said, if you go.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
To that thing and like people that are not in
your niche are not popping up, You're not your seo
is off, people are less likely to find you. So
I started putting keywords in my bio like relationship coach,
dating coach, like relationship advice, because that was bringing me
up on the pages of people that were seeking that information.
(14:35):
I think that that fundamentally was a game changer for
me because it put me in the category of people
that seek out that type of stuff, you know, like
whether it's relationships, matters of the heart. So I think
that that really changed the game for me. And literally
doesn't matter what your niche is, if you are a
business owner, if you are a motivational coach, whatever it is, consistency. Consistency.
(15:01):
It doesn't matter if you're selling bottles of water on
the internet. Okay, if they know you the water girl,
that's it right. The people always say people have to
know what are they coming to your page for? And
when people have asked me to kind of help them
with their pages, it's like, what are people coming here for?
Like my friends, Oh, you're a gospel singer?
Speaker 3 (15:21):
Okay? Great? That people?
Speaker 1 (15:22):
You know that girl that's on the internet, you know,
singing songs about the Lord whatever it is?
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Right?
Speaker 1 (15:27):
You know that girl that's a teaching women how to
fix your credit in thirty days?
Speaker 3 (15:32):
What you are that girl or that god that does? What?
If people don't know what they're coming to your page
for you, it will slow your growth? Right.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
Even I know that there's women on the internet that
are curvy girls that I can go to when I
want to buy a new bra or a swimsuit, because
that is what they do. I know, I'm going, Oh,
that's the curvy girl that I know, gonna show me
what outfits I can wear?
Speaker 3 (15:57):
What are you that girl or God?
Speaker 1 (15:59):
For that and itself will really kind of change the
game for you. So those are things not implemented.
Speaker 4 (16:05):
You know.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
I think sometimes as a creators or just as women,
people have an issue at putting themselves in a box.
Speaker 4 (16:11):
And that's one of.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
The hardest things that I have as a coach when
women come to me and they're like, I don't want
I don't want to be boxing, I don't want to
just do this, I want to do this in that
And it's like, well, you do have to be as
t see it just shared in some sort of box,
in a lane that at least allows you to show
up as a as an expert in your industry. And
if you can't be placed in an industry, then we're
(16:33):
kind of missing the mark. So I think that that
makes so much sense. I think too, and I would
love for us to have a conversation outside of the podcast.
But one of the things I've been struggling with in
this new journey of the soft life and starting a
family and you know, having a brand manager but not
really wanting to do like brand deals and trying to
figure out like what's comfortable is I'm in this season
(16:54):
of transition and that can be hard because then.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
It's like, well, which box do I tick? You know?
Speaker 2 (17:00):
So that's really great advice, and I think even the
thing that you mentioned about consistency when we talk about
as you know, there's so many different social media platforms
and being consistent. What has been your method for being
consistent on Instagram but also flowing your content into other
platforms as well? Because you're also on TikTok you started
(17:21):
a YouTube channel, Like, what has been your experience with
kind of like repurposing content or allowing it to live
in multiple spaces.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Yeah, I found that people will find me on different
platforms and that different platforms they're different, and I think
if you understand they're different and their purpose, that will
get you so much further. Instagram is really it's a
millennials playground period, point in the blank. And it also
(17:51):
is people care what it looks like TikTok.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
You can go on TikTok.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
With a bonding on your head eating fried chicken. Nobody cares.
They don't care, they don't care. It's just so much
of an easier audience. You also can find it's more
of a storytelling type of vibe on TikTok or YouTube
versus Instagram, where it's more short form and the platform
(18:16):
is actually favoring short form content. TikTok, Hell, we watch
What's the Girl Resa Tisa, we watched we watched the
whole Netflix documentary. Basically that's what it felt like, and
we just kept coming back, you know, kept coming back
to it because it's more of a like storytelling kind
of app. And I also feel like TikTok and YouTube
(18:36):
are also we call like TikTok University YouTube University.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
It's a great place to learn and study as well.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
And so just knowing what each what each platform is
good for, and what their audience is utilizing the platform for.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
Yeah, thank you for sharing that. MAYA next question for
you is what changes did you experience right away when
your followers jumped from the two hundred to the five
hundred K. And I know it wasn't like an overnight thing,
but you kind of did kind of wake up one
day it was like, whoa it is you? Every time
you look back at your phone, it's growing. What were
some of the main changes that you experienced while that
(19:17):
growth is happening.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
I was in over my the valume, the valuume right
the valume of my DMS.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
That was a big thing, and also.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
That I needed to automate stuff like I was immediately
on mini chat because guess what, I cannot I cannot
respond to everybody.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
I just can't.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
I think the valume and like putting systems in place.
At first it was like, okay, this for play play,
this is cute. This is my account. It's me talking
to y'all. Now it's like, do I need an assistant
to like fake be me and reply to these people?
Do I need to automate these Do I need a
link to be sent to your DM? So immediately the
valume pushed me into automation, like I have to have
(20:07):
systems in place now to be able to accommodate my audience.
And it's worked pretty well, like many chats I do,
because I'll put like comment joined to join my secret
grows chat or something, and I'll get so many joins
that Instagram will flag my account because it thinks it's
like spam. Wow, I have to like waited that I
(20:28):
can't comment back and things like that. It gets kind
of weird, but it's a good thing. It's a good
thing to it's a high class problem. It's what I
it's a high class problem. So that was honestly, the
immediate change was like I need to automate. I need
help now, like what could I do to lighten my
(20:49):
load a little bit? And then honestly, I'm such a
like low key I think myself to be a humble person,
but also just like more people recognizing me, and that
has been adjustment.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Like now just like my everyday Sunday day party, it's.
Speaker 4 (21:06):
Like are you that girl that?
Speaker 1 (21:07):
And I'm like, oh wow, this is like a thing now,
which also spills into your dating because I'm not necessarily
telling the guys that I'm dating that it's a thing
and it's my job. And then now I'm out and
people may want to take pictures. They're like, oh my god,
can I tag you?
Speaker 3 (21:24):
Oh my god?
Speaker 1 (21:25):
And so that can be a little interesting, which is
a really a weird place to meet, because I really
find myself to be such a background kind of girl.
So yeah, the valume pushed me into automation and just
like accepting my new position in life.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:41):
So with all of those, those are all like logistical things.
Let's talk about mental when all of this was happening,
the growth coming out of nowhere. Because you've seen growth,
You've seen like consistent growth over time. But I think
with this it was it was crazy. I mean, you
doubled your following in such a short time. Mentally, what
(22:02):
did that do for you? And let's talk mental health
in terms of how we associate our existence in regards
to who we are on social media and you know
it's this little phone has a lot of.
Speaker 4 (22:12):
Power in it. What did that do to you from
a mental standpoint?
Speaker 1 (22:16):
Yeah, I think that. I think we've talked about this before.
Breathe like, just like you can be you know, the
shadow banning is a real thing. The being stagnant and
being stuck and like trying to figure out. Then you
feel like a puppet where he's like, well, what is
it they want versus what I want to do versus
what they want me to do?
Speaker 3 (22:33):
And so you kind of get stuck in that.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
But I feel like when I started to see the
return on what I was doing, I was.
Speaker 3 (22:42):
Like, bet say less Like that's how I felt.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
I felt like seriously, I felt like, yeah, now I'm
glad y'all finally see it.
Speaker 3 (22:50):
Like now I felt like I got my spot, I
got what I deserved, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
And again, I don't compare myself to other people but
I feel like people can't do what you could do,
how you could do it, and.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
That's just that.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
And so I felt like I finally started getting my
flowers from shit to my baby. I've been on this
internet every morning, every morning, trying to tell y'all you know,
and I finally felt like, Okay, whoever released me out
of Instagram jail, thank you so much. But now it's showtime.
And I really felt like I'm not gonna let this,
you know, pass me by. I wanted to celebrate little
(23:25):
miles thoughts. I celebrated two fifty. I celebrated y'all do
three three hundred. Yes, I remember being a GZ concert.
I celebrated three hundred. You all celebrated my four fifty like,
oh my gosh, like it was. I was like, wow, no,
you gotta celebrate these small wins. So I feel like
from my mental health it won. It felt like life
is getting good down here because like my work is
(23:47):
paying off, and my work wasn't dependent on any anything
but me getting what I felt like my work paid
off for, right, Like that's really all I want. I
didn't want, you know, recognition or anything. I'm just like, hey,
they say that this is the blueprint to grow and
scale on Instagram and to get I'm doing those things?
Why am I not reaping the return? So that that
(24:09):
just put me in a mental space of like, yeah,
it's showtime. Like I feel like it put that dog
in me, like yeah, like now I know that I
can stand toe to toe with everybody else and yeah,
that's it gave me like a mental boost, but it
also gave me a heavier crown because people are dependent
(24:32):
on you. We went for your birthday trip to Mexico
and people was like, where are you at girl? Where
you ain't been on it? And I'm like, I'm on vacation.
Maybe you should go on one, Like I'm on vacation, baby, girl,
Like I can't. Like my whole life is a dedicated
to you, you know, but I think that it is
a lot of pressure. And also like people are mean.
(24:53):
The Internet is a mean place, and people would especially
talking about matters of the opposite sex and like you know,
men versus women and all that whole like Red Peel
Podcast debate, Like men will get in your comments and
call you fat, ugly dirty, Like how could you dare
demand this stuff when you ain't nothing but a six anyway,
like it.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Can get really mean, And yeah, I think I I felt.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
Like I had lived my life in the back so
much that I was willing to take what was coming
to me to really kind of live in my purpose,
you know, because it's actually what I prayed for.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
So yeah, yeah, And I wanted to ask you because
with all of the recognition, you know, also comes the criticism.
And you had mentioned when we did your celebration brunch,
you were so emotional and you were just like, y'all
have no idea, like all the things that it's like, yes,
these numbers are great, but also I've been getting so
(25:53):
much criticism and just mean messages.
Speaker 4 (25:55):
How did you.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Handle that criticism and that came along with you go viral?
Speaker 4 (26:01):
Are you ready to go from hustler to soft liafe CEO?
I'm here to help.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
I've created the Soft Life Society, a membership based community
where I provide weekly events such as group coaching calls,
brand and social media audits, masterclasses, and featured guest speakers.
Speaker 4 (26:15):
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Speaker 2 (26:15):
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Visit the softlafe, Ceo dot com, Backslash Society and use
code free trial for thirty days free access.
Speaker 1 (26:30):
Well, I had already had a taste of that because
I did a reality television show that was based off
of dating, and that was the first time that I
was number one on national television, but also coined as
plus size. I hadn't I'm like baby, my family from Mississippi,
Chicago via Mississippi. Everybody looked like this. But I didn't
(26:54):
realize the beauty standards, you know, like, even though I'm
a consumer of beauty, I didn't realize that the industry
of Hollywood and television, that it was a real thing.
So then I was coined as this like plus sized
girl who wasn't secure with herself, and that was really
hard on me mentally. So I had already kind of
(27:15):
had a little taste of that. That gave me a
little thicker skin. But also in the space of social media,
sometimes most of the time, engagement is good no matter
what people are talking about, as long as they're talking.
So I had to also compartmentalize things like, Okay, yeah,
they arguing in my comments, But now when a brand
(27:37):
reaches out to me, they're going to be able to
see I got fifty thousand shares, I got twenty thousand comments,
I got five hundred thousand likes, or whatever the case
may be. And so you know, yeah, thanks for the chatter,
thanks for the me and comments now Sephora or whatever it's.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
Coming to me to say, hey, can you do you know?
Speaker 1 (27:56):
And so that I was able to like section that all,
but also keeping like great people.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Around me that remind me, you know that I'm.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
A great person and a great friend, and you know,
friends that just have my back and they'll literally write
me and say don't go read those comments, like it's
just not really good for your mental health.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
So yeah, yeah, no, thank you for sharing that, because
I know that that stuff is, you know, not the
fun and pretty parts of it. But I do want
to switch gears a little bit because you have built
a really strong community and I think so many times
when people are thinking about post sing on social or
growing their following, they're not understanding.
Speaker 4 (28:36):
That you don't own this platform.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
One thing that you have done a really great job
of is creating a space for your ladies to come
and really get to experience you and have that sense
of community. Talk me through your girl's chat and what
made you create it, if there's anything you would have
done differently in creating it, and then we'll jump into
my next question.
Speaker 4 (28:56):
But let's talk about the girl's chat.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Yeah, so the girls chat, kay was birth out of
me wanting to tell women secrets of how to deal
with men off of the Internet. I was like, yo,
I really want to tell you how to get this
man to do everything that you want him to do.
But I don't want the man in our business. And
so I prayed a supergirls chat. But to my point
(29:18):
about like growth pushed me into automation. Instagram will allow
you to have subscriptions, so I started there. It went
from it first started at nine to ninety nine. I
took it up to fourteen ninety nine.
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Now it was.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
Nineteen ninety nine, right demand God is good. But I
took that and Instagram only allows the chat for twenty
eight days. Can you imagine restarting your chat every twenty
eight days? Like it was so annoying. We couldn't put
the same type of media and things like that in there,
like share voice notes and stuff like that. And I
(29:52):
ended up taking it from there. I looked at Slack
Slack was an option, and then like What's App was
another option, and so I had run my course on Instagram.
It just wasn't the best place. And also people were like, oh,
I'm trying to join and I'm on the waiting list,
and I was just like, Okay, this is too much,
and so I moved it to What's App and I
(30:12):
use my subscription through stand Store, so I'm also able
to have an automated email, so like once they subscribe
from stand Store, they'll get the link to the What's
App chat and then they'll be able to join there.
So it really takes time to figure out, but honestly,
it's just been like growth has been pushing me to
different revenues to be able to accommodate the growth.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
So now it's like.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
One hundred ors maybe one hundred and fifty or so
women on Instagram that are subscribed, and then the other
ones are it's like six hundred of them from What's
App at like twenty dollars a month, So that wow, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (30:50):
That is so amazing.
Speaker 2 (30:52):
Yeah, I think the like, my the first thing I
always tell somebody is like, if you have a large audience,
you got to get them into a community. Got to
get them somewhere else where you have immedia access to them.
And as you grow and as you switch platforms and think,
you know, these people will come with you, like it's
it doesn't just live on Instagram. So I love that
you've done that. And then even when you think about
(31:13):
the margin of profit that you can make when you
decide the price of something what that includes, and even
you know, getting to a point where you have different
membership tiers, right, you might have a twenty dollars which
is like the basic community, but then you got the
one hundred dollars a month where you get the community
plus these extra coaching calls or you know, sister circles
things like that, so you can really grow and excel.
(31:35):
So I'm glad that we were able to talk about
the community. Cause girl, yeah, when we were at the
Cavo trip, I know your girls is like, okay, where's
our stuff? We were, I know, to see what pulls
her phone out and she's like, if you hain't on.
Speaker 5 (31:48):
A trip, that is so funny, so funny, But you're
about lo key, I've learned about communities by it's so funny.
Speaker 1 (31:59):
I'm sure you know be simoned like that she has
millions of followers, and she started charging people to be
in her close friends and she was like, I go
off the line and then I have people sign up
there and my team is manually adding people to my
only to my my what do you call it?
Speaker 3 (32:19):
Close friends? Close friends that they were adding people to closer.
I was like, that's genius.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
I didn't feel like I had the following then to
do it, but I kept it as a mental note.
I was like, Okay, bet, if I ever get a
huge following enough where I feel like girls are coming
back and they really want to be I'll take it
off line. And that was honestly one of the best
decisions that I could have made, is like take it
off line and then being able to like tier tier
(32:46):
off those categories of the chat, like it's some really
big entrepreneurs that's like, y'all, you can you can sell
merch you can sell courses, you can sell like and
I was just like, Okay, yeah, this is what I
need to do. I need to start selling courses making
a community and that has been like a big, a
big growth thing for me as well.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
Yeah, no, that's amazing, So I do want to ask
you for those listening who maybe they've been doing all
the things right, they're doing their version of being consistent,
and they're getting to the point of burnout or losing
motivation to keep going. Because this is something that you
have experienced, right, doing all the things and not seeing
(33:28):
the immediate results.
Speaker 4 (33:29):
What advice would you give to those people who are
in that space right now? Guess what your girl is?
Speaker 2 (33:34):
Finally, on YouTube, I'm posting weekly content including behind the
scenes of my self life, all things entrepreneurship, and the
journey of my husband and I starting our family. Head
over to YouTube and subscribe to my channel, Brianna Ponte,
the Self Life CEO.
Speaker 1 (33:48):
Imagine if you stop and you were gonna hit it,
like you can't stop, Like imagine if you stop before
like you have to keep going. And one there's nothing
new under the but like, sometimes you don't get the
benefit of your like that you don't reap the benefits immediately,
And that's just not a social media lesson, that's a
(34:09):
lesson for life. Sometimes you don't get the reward immediately,
and it is such a great lesson and honestly, almost
every champion in this world has that same story about
how they were trying and trying and trying and trying
to do it and they almost gave up and they
did it and look at them, right. That is a
(34:30):
lifelong trope of anybody that ever won something.
Speaker 3 (34:33):
So it's just like.
Speaker 1 (34:35):
You, even if you feel burned out, you can restrategize,
you can redirect, but you can't stop. You have to
you have to keep at it so that. I know
that sounds a little cliche, like keep going, don't stop,
keep going, but it will aid you in so many
other categories of your life when you realize that, Like
sometimes it's not stop. You know, it's not that you're
(34:57):
not gonna get it. It's just like a redirection or strategizing,
but you gotta keep your head in the game.
Speaker 3 (35:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:03):
Absolutely, So I want to wrap up the episode with
a little behind the scenes. I want to see to
take us through what a typical week looks like and
how now running a social media page that gets so
much engagement with all the things considered, email, your community,
content creation, your DMS, and you're just day to day life,
(35:26):
what does that look like and how are you managing
it all?
Speaker 1 (35:30):
I wish that I had some beautiful story to tell y'all.
Speaker 3 (35:35):
I am a raggedy content creator. Baby.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Don't look to me. Don't look to me for no
type of organization. I'm not the I am up in
a morning, the batch content thing.
Speaker 3 (35:45):
It's shameful.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
I wish I could batch content create, and I'm just
not there yet.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
I will record on my phone in the morning. Don't
don't do that, y'all.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
I will record on my phone in the morning, I'll
edit in a morning, I'll put it out and I'll
have four five hours downtime. And I was like, you know,
this could be a great time to be recording a video, right,
and I won't do it. And then here comes my
posting time. I'm like, you better get your butt out
this bed and do it.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
But I don't. I always will do it.
Speaker 1 (36:12):
But I have done like periods of time where I
have batch content created, and it is the oh my,
the freedom and not having to be pressed for your
content that day, that you have something that you recorded
a week or a month ago that you can put
out right. That is just really the freedom of work smarter,
not harder. I'm still working hard, y'all. I ain't got
(36:33):
to the work and smarter part. But I will say
that batch content creating is a really big thing, and
I wish that. I wish that upon me, Like I
need to get there to that, to that point. But
also like now I have like brand deals and things
like that, Like I just had two deliverables this week
where you have to like send over the script then
they want to see you like your first rendition of
(36:54):
the of the of the video and things like that.
So I do do those things ahead time. But honestly, y'all,
if I ain't had no brand deal, I'll probably still
raggedy creating.
Speaker 3 (37:04):
So I have just more so.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
Goals that I want for my life, you know, goals
that I want for content creating. But I wish I
had like a pretty old story to tell y'all about. Yo, mondays,
I do this and my assistant does that, and then
we we brainstorm. I ain't gotta no, I'm still I'm
still look but maybe I need to come up to
your apartment, Breed. We can talk about how you can
look get me, me and my brand together. But I
(37:28):
gotta do better. I have to do better.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
But you know, I love that because I do feel
like so often when we do these interviews, there are
these very like, you know, pretty schedules, and this is
what I do. And it's nice to know that at
the end of the day, you can be getting really
great results, and you can be doing really great things,
and you can be out here doing it in a
very untraditional, unplanned way and it still works at the
(37:51):
end of the day. What you're doing is you're waking
up and you're choosing to do it even when you don't.
Speaker 4 (37:54):
Necessarily feel like it.
Speaker 2 (37:55):
And you know, some girls just aren't planners too, Like,
there are women out there.
Speaker 1 (37:59):
Who like, don't give me anxiety them gus. My friends
have given me journals and journals and planners and they're
all stacked up collecting does I'm not a journal girl.
I'm not a It actually gives me anxiety and it
triggers my ADHD as well. And you would think that
planning would relieve you of some of those things, but
(38:20):
even the idea of planning ahead actually gives me anxiety.
So I just thugging it out. But don't do that job.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
Don't be likely to each to each of those Whatever
works for you is what works for you.
Speaker 4 (38:32):
So before we wrap up, just let us know what
things you have going on. What are you working on?
What can we expect in the future.
Speaker 3 (38:40):
Yes, so a couple of things.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
Number One, please join my super Girls Chat, so subscribe there.
You can get that from my Instagram. There's a link
a link on my Instagram or any of my posts.
You can come and join and it will send you
to a link to my secret girls Chat. We use
what's app as a platform.
Speaker 3 (39:01):
What else am I doing?
Speaker 1 (39:03):
Also working on just like some merch and pop up events,
So that's gonna be good. I'm gonna be kind of
like going on tour, like doing some singles, mixers, dating
type of events and things like that with merch included.
And then lastly, I'm going to be on Tonight's Conversation,
(39:23):
which is a big thing. So I'm gonna be on
their live show in DC and in Baltimore.
Speaker 3 (39:29):
So that was that. That is I'm really excited about that.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
That was actually something that I manifested and it's actually
on my screen saver to be a part of that platform,
and they invited me for their podcast, but then they
called me back for the live show, So I'm excited.
I think I told you that breeze that just happened
a day or two ago. But yes, so yes, good
things are happening. Good things are happening.
Speaker 4 (39:52):
That is so awesome.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
Yeah, I'm just like I said, I am a bystander
witnessing the growth and all the blessings that have.
Speaker 4 (39:58):
Come your way and out.
Speaker 2 (39:59):
It is all all due to your hard work and
consistency in the times where the results weren't showing up.
So I'm just super proud of you and I'm very
grateful to be able to call you a friend. So girl,
thank you so much for your time. I know that
the girls are gonna love this one. This is our
first episode on anything viral related, so again, thank you
so much.
Speaker 4 (40:19):
For being here.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
Thank you, this was awesome.
Speaker 4 (40:23):
Thanks for tuning in to Soft Life CEO.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
I hope that today's episode gets you a little bit
closer to achieving your definition of a soft life. If
you're ready to start the journey from hustler to soft
life CEO, go to the Soft Life ceo dot com Backslash.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
Society for a thirty day free trial in my coaching community.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
If you found this episode helpful, share it with a friend,
leave a review, and don't forget to subscribe.
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