March 31, 2026 • 21 mins
Our host Darriel Roy interviews American Author & Entrepreneur, Becky Jackson. She is the author of the book, Seeking, Finding, Healing: The Complete Guide to Self Directed Inner Family Healing.
Listen
Watch
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome. Thank you so much for watching. This
show is all about giving you insights and showcasing brands
that help you to live your best life and give
you confidence. As always, I want to kick start your
morning with some motivation advice to help you to feel
inspired and energize to start your day today. I want
to talk about the importances of understanding that what sometimes
feels like an ending is just to be getting to
(00:22):
something better. Have you ever had a time in your
life where a situation ended and you were left feeling hopeless,
almost like everything was going wrong and that the chances
of it getting better was unlikely. Perhaps it was getting
that goal of a job you loved, going through a breakup,
or maybe plans you set for your life suddenly changed. Oftentimes,
when something seems to be coming to a close or changing,
(00:44):
it's often the universe or arranging your plans by replacing
it with something even better. Perhaps you wouldn't have left
a situation if circumstances hadn't forced you out of your
comfort zone. Remember, change is a part of life, and
even though I can feel like an ending, it's often
just a universe rearranging things in your favor. As the
saying goes, just when the caterpillar thought the world was over,
(01:07):
it became a butterfly. Next up on the show, we
have an American author and entrepreneur, Becky Jackson. She's the author
of the book Seeking, Finding Healing, the Complete Guide to
Self Directed in her Family Healing. Becky, thank you so
much for being on the show today. How are you doing.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
I'm doing great. Thank you so much for having me
on your show. It's an honor.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Thank you for being here. And before we talk about
your amazing book that has to do with inner healing
and self love, I know, you know, let's talk about
what inspired it. I know that you went through an
eating addiction, So tell us about that period and how
it's led you here today.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Well, I actually had a couple of addictions. So I
was married to my drinking partner. We were had two
toddled you know, kind of young kids. His drinking was
advancing very rapidly, and so my eating and was advancing
more rapidly than my drinking. And so I've sought out
(02:08):
alan On, which is a twelve step program, as well
as some other twelve step programs to help me understand
there is a solution and the thing that struck me
so at such a heart level was the twelve step
path invites you to live from spiritual principles.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
And when I got some.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Of the literature and started reading it, it said, if
you want to live without obsession, you need to start
living from spiritual principles. And I thought, Okay, well, I
need to make a list of what all these spiritual
principles are. So I just kind of made myself a
student of learning, and I found that there's a uniqueness,
(02:54):
in my opinion, to addictions, meaning that somewhat similar to skip,
they have voices that talk to us, and yet unlike schizophrenia,
addiction voices talk to us in our voice and they
and we think it's us. So a lot of the
work that I do, and a lot of the work
that I did on my personal recovery, is to separate
(03:18):
myself from those addiction voices so that I could make
a commitment I didn't know it at the time, but
to become the parent that my younger selves needed, yearned for,
and deserved, and that was the beginning of the path
of self respect, self love. I didn't know it at
(03:39):
the time, but I believe that that was the beginning
of the path.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
And when did you realize that you needed help with
your eating addiction, Because I feel like you know a
lot of people it goes too far before they get help.
So when did you realize that you know enough is enough?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Well, I think because I was cross addicted. I started
when my eating was more out of control. I started
using diet pills. Well, that really exacerbated my sanity into
a downwards spile. Yeah, so that was really I think
between watching my husband almost he almost died twice in
(04:16):
my first year of recovery, and realizing that I had
to get my own path stabilized instead of focusing on him,
I think was.
Speaker 3 (04:29):
A major step forward for me. So you know, I.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Wasn't I didn't have any pride about being a parent
or a spouse or really proud of my life, and
the path of recovery gave me all of that back.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Amazing. And you know you're helping other people now with
your company Inner Family Healing, So tell us about how
your company helps people get rid of past trauma and hurt.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Well, most of I pretty dominantly work with people with addictions,
but I'm not exclusive to people with addictions.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
So let me start with.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Kind of helping addicts understand because their self respect is
probably the most bruised. Is We're going to find a
bottom line that includes, no matter what, no matter what,
we're going to stay away from the addiction. And so
that starts to let us wake up in the morning
(05:32):
with some self respect building. I didn't realize that at
the time, but integrity is one of the most major
spiritual principles we can live by. So I decided to
say to myself, I want to be a woman I
respect no matter what, I'm not going to pick up
those addictions. That again started to open the door, so
(05:55):
I help people with addictions have that in place. First,
with people who don't have addictions, I try to guide them,
as you probably could tell from the book, into spending
some time really working on what their spiritual and heart
beliefs are. I've worked with people who are Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Jews.
(06:21):
You know, it doesn't matter. What matters is that you
find a spiritual foundation that really resonates at your own
heart level. That way, the person starts to become again
the parent that those younger selves need yearn foreign deserve.
(06:41):
When that is stabilized, they do start to show up
in our meditation, hoping that we can guide them to
letting go of self rejection, self loathing, self hate because
they're trusting us. We are building the trust that a
parent needs to build to be a guiding force in
(07:05):
any younger child's life. So it's an inner process of
building that trust and then trusting that the individual's unique
path that when they show up, will be guided. So,
as you probably know, in my model, I encourage people
not only to have that solid foundation of their own
(07:27):
kind of heart wisdom, but I encourage them to believe
that there are future cells that can help raise these
kids to healthy levels. So, you know the old saying
it takes a village to raise a child. We build
our own internal village from you know future. So I
was thirty at the time, and I'll be eighty two
(07:49):
in a couple of months. So I started visualizing future
selves that had more wisdom than I had at the moment,
had more self respect at the moment. And then I
started bringing them in and my younger selves love having
all these grandmas And why is women to really count
(08:11):
on as well as me? As I went along, so
was it scary to get started, Yeah, but was it
necessary and was it priceless in the long run?
Speaker 3 (08:23):
Absolutely?
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Yeah, And I think I think that's really interesting that
you know, addictions are tied to self worth and that
makes sense. But you know, if you're not feeling good,
then you turn to these things. But when you return
back to self worth and love, then we're able to
heal ourselves. Right.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
It is the younger selves that developed the dependencies on addictions,
because you know, a twelve year old, an eight year
old of fifteen year old doesn't have the maturity really
to come up with sane and sound solutions, and so
helping them know, we're going to help them find same
and sound, spiritually saved and sound solutions for living and
(09:04):
we are not shoving the addiction at them in times
of crisis or upset or confusion, that we will find
a new way to respond to life. And so that's
an important element I think that happens is there's no
shame about self loathing or self worth. It's like can't
(09:26):
you can't have the maturity at those younger ages, and
you use what's available to you. I do take the
approach that there's a genetic vulnerability with addictions that can
get activated when we're young, and just as oftentimes people
that don't have that genetic vulnerability might have great athletic
(09:49):
abilities and they'll use that to distract from all of
their trauma. Right. Yeah, but particularly, we have developed patterns
of coping with life that have not brought us to
the best place, and helping us break our dependencies on
those old patterns is absolutely key to becoming the person
(10:13):
that we are proud of being.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
And Becky, you're the author of Seeking, Finding Healing, the
Complete Guide of Directed Family Healing. So tell us about
this book and the tools you use to help people,
you know, turn trauma and pain into empowerment.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
Well, I think the kind of what I've been saying about,
because you know, doing the work to become a parent
that our younger selves need. I started recording all of
you know, handwriting all of my meditations after the visualizations,
and my first visualization was to make amends to the
(10:50):
younger selves that I was really sad, that I calm
them by you know, walking down a path that was
would be harmful to any one, and that I'm committed
to becoming the parent that they need. After a few visualizations,
and by the way, I only had the time to
(11:11):
meditate fifteen minutes every other Thursday night. I'd gone back
to school, I had small kids, I'm in my own home,
I did all the housework, et cetera. So I was
surprised at how much healing really happened for having only
that small amount of time. And anyway, after a few months, no,
I'm going to say, you know, three to six weeks
(11:35):
that really wounded. Young Becky showed up, and she showed
up with kind of a shame posture of slumped over
and head down. And I, although she didn't say anything,
I intuitively knew that she was showing me her level
of self loathing. And so my response to her, I
(11:56):
almost froze. But a little five year old old Becky
went over to her in this meditation and tried, she
should have beaten bloody with blood all over, and I
never was beaten, so I knew she was showing me
self rejection, self loathing. And my little five year old
Becky went over and dusted off some of the dried,
(12:17):
caked blood on her face, and I said to her, finally,
there is no justification for that behavior, But there is
no justification for self loathing. And we will find something
valuable about you and we are glad that you showed
up to be part of our inner family. So that's
kind of the framework that I encouraged people to expect
(12:43):
and to have their amends ready to share, have their
wisdom ready to share, and move forward just from that
beginning commitment to them through the zation work and in
the book, I actually wrote out as generically as I
(13:07):
could the kind of the breathing, the setting the stage
for the inner families to show up. And sometimes I've
had clients say, you know, I see myself in a
beautiful mountain cabin and they just stare in the windows,
(13:27):
and then at the end of working together, they're all
dancing in the streets together joyously. So it can start
off with them saying, really, you're really going to do that.
You're really going to be who I need, and if
you keep with the work, it's magical. And I think
(13:48):
you know from my book because I've really been at
this a long time. My forty six year old son,
who was six when I came into recovery, died of
his addiction. At that time, I knew that I needed
(14:08):
to comfort my young mother thirty five to forty five
year old mother who wishes she could have had a
different answer for him, wishes that she could have understood
better how to help him, so on and so forth,
and I just had to let her cry the self
of today, which I was about seventy three at the time,
(14:30):
I knew I had seen the path he was living.
I knew, you know, I wasn't surprised. I loved him
to pieces. I know he loved me. I tried to
roll model recovery for him, freedom for him. So that
was my adult self, but my young mothers needed to
(14:53):
deal with her guilt of what she could have done differently,
how she could have responded differently, and it was my
up to comfort her.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
Yeah, well, I'm so sorry to hear about your son,
and I'm glad that you're using you know, the pain
and to help other people, you know, to help other
people so that doesn't happen to them, and to get
rid of addiction, because it's a horrible thing, right, you know.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
I'm a recent widow as well, and I think realizing
that the balance in life for me, and I think
for a lot of us, is to stay a vulnerable
human and at the same time, I have one foot
in a very sound.
Speaker 3 (15:36):
Trust in the divine order.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
So for me, that was that's the dance that helped
me put the book together after jeff my Son's death.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
And you talk about the spiritual laws and how it's
helped you on your recovery, and it also helps your
clients talk about these spiritual laws and what they are.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Well, it's the spiritual principles of gratitude and kind and
compassion and love and patience and gratitude. You know that
there's so many spiritual principles that can guide us to
live differently. So I remember when I was early in
my recovery, I had a woman who was ahead of
me and her recovery, and she said, Becky, in times
(16:18):
of confusion, upset, you know whatever, do not do what
you would do. I want you to make a list
of three to five women you admire and respect. Pick
one of them, do what you think they would do.
And I was able to access a level of wisdom
I didn't feel I had, and that opened.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
The door to future sembles. After a few.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Months of doing that, you know, pulling the name up
of women I admired, I decided I could just call them,
you know, my older Becky's. So, but those spiritual principles
are the guiding force and they operate again under any
religious dogma of kindness and compassion and gratitude and patience
(17:04):
and acceptance. Yeah, so as opposed to spiritual laws, I
think that just spiritual principles is the best word or phrase.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
Yeah, absolutely, I mean love, compassion. You know, they even
show that the energies are the highest on the pyramid, right,
those are the ones that radiate the highest frequencies too, right,
so it make rise to go back to that. And
you also have a social model recovery home for women
with addictions or tell us about that as well.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
This was back in nineteen eighty six and a group
of women in recovery struggling with some of them wanted
me to move down to San Diego and open up
this recovery home. And so took a little doing, but
after a while I got down there, and it was
a twelve step social model, so that the women all
(18:02):
had an opportunity to keep connections to any therapist they
were working with. We didn't make them come in and
use our therapy, but we wanted them to have a
twelve step model of living. From spiritual principles and putting,
as I say, the plug and the jug on any addiction,
and that was a safe environment for them to start
(18:23):
doing their own inner work. And that's when I would
do morning meditations with the group, invite them to understand
that this healing is possible, that they can become the parent.
It was through all women, they can become the mother
that these younger selves need. So yeah, I was the
(18:43):
executive director there for a few years and then I
left and did some other things, but it was a
magical program.
Speaker 3 (18:51):
I'm still in.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
Touch with the woman who was our first resident. She
had been a binge vomitter followed by one hundred laxatives
a day. She'd been hospitalized I think four times, and
this September she'll celebrate forty years of abstinence from her
eating addiction. And I'm still in touch with her, and
(19:15):
I'm still in touch with one of the or two
of the volunteers.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Something that you're helping so many people with your work,
And speaking of helping people, you know, I created my
platform to inspire, to uplift and really to showcase anything
as possible. So Bucky, you know, for anyone that's having
a rough time. You know, maybe it's addiction, maybe it's
just you know, not being in a good place in
life and they're feeling unmotivated. What would you say to
inspire to blift that.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
That there is hope for change, There is hope to
re establish a sense of self respect. Is it going
to take work?
Speaker 3 (19:48):
You bet it is? But is worth the work? Worth it?
You bet?
Speaker 2 (19:54):
It is priceless. Somebody asked me one time, what do
you think you've taught your children, you know, growing up?
And I thought, what a great question, And I wrapped
it up with the only thing any of us ever
take to our grave is our opinion of ourself. And
we can recoup a wonderful opinion of ourselves, not about perfection,
(20:16):
but about willingness to grow and evolve and become the
person the universe is inviting us to be. So they
can go to my website, they can grab the book
I did do the audible version of my two last
books on eating addiction, as well as they and our family,
and so they can go to the website in our
(20:37):
Familyhealing dot com.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
Very nice. We're going to link that information below so
our viewers can learn more about your services. But Becky,
thank you so much for being on the show today.
You know, keep up the amazing work of helping others
because I think it's so needed. Kindness, compassionate love is
so needed in the world right now, right So thank
you for all the work that you're doing, and thank
you for being on the show.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Thank you for all the work you do.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
The dera Rousso is available on Roku, Amazon, bi tv, iHeartRadio,
and Apple Podcasts.
Hello and welcome. Thank you so much for watching. This
show is all about giving you insights and showcasing brands
that help you to live your best life and give
you confidence. As always, I want to kick start your
morning with some motivation advice to help you to feel
inspired and energize to start your day today. I want
to talk about the importances of understanding that what sometimes
feels like an ending is just to be getting to
(00:22):
something better. Have you ever had a time in your
life where a situation ended and you were left feeling hopeless,
almost like everything was going wrong and that the chances
of it getting better was unlikely. Perhaps it was getting
that goal of a job you loved, going through a breakup,
or maybe plans you set for your life suddenly changed. Oftentimes,
when something seems to be coming to a close or changing,
(00:44):
it's often the universe or arranging your plans by replacing
it with something even better. Perhaps you wouldn't have left
a situation if circumstances hadn't forced you out of your
comfort zone. Remember, change is a part of life, and
even though I can feel like an ending, it's often
just a universe rearranging things in your favor. As the
saying goes, just when the caterpillar thought the world was over,
(01:07):
it became a butterfly. Next up on the show, we
have an American author and entrepreneur, Becky Jackson. She's the author
of the book Seeking, Finding Healing, the Complete Guide to
Self Directed in her Family Healing. Becky, thank you so
much for being on the show today. How are you doing.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
I'm doing great. Thank you so much for having me
on your show. It's an honor.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Thank you for being here. And before we talk about
your amazing book that has to do with inner healing
and self love, I know, you know, let's talk about
what inspired it. I know that you went through an
eating addiction, So tell us about that period and how
it's led you here today.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Well, I actually had a couple of addictions. So I
was married to my drinking partner. We were had two
toddled you know, kind of young kids. His drinking was
advancing very rapidly, and so my eating and was advancing
more rapidly than my drinking. And so I've sought out
(02:08):
alan On, which is a twelve step program, as well
as some other twelve step programs to help me understand
there is a solution and the thing that struck me
so at such a heart level was the twelve step
path invites you to live from spiritual principles.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
And when I got some.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
Of the literature and started reading it, it said, if
you want to live without obsession, you need to start
living from spiritual principles. And I thought, Okay, well, I
need to make a list of what all these spiritual
principles are. So I just kind of made myself a
student of learning, and I found that there's a uniqueness,
(02:54):
in my opinion, to addictions, meaning that somewhat similar to skip,
they have voices that talk to us, and yet unlike schizophrenia,
addiction voices talk to us in our voice and they
and we think it's us. So a lot of the
work that I do, and a lot of the work
that I did on my personal recovery, is to separate
(03:18):
myself from those addiction voices so that I could make
a commitment I didn't know it at the time, but
to become the parent that my younger selves needed, yearned for,
and deserved, and that was the beginning of the path
of self respect, self love. I didn't know it at
(03:39):
the time, but I believe that that was the beginning
of the path.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
And when did you realize that you needed help with
your eating addiction, Because I feel like you know a
lot of people it goes too far before they get help.
So when did you realize that you know enough is enough?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Well, I think because I was cross addicted. I started
when my eating was more out of control. I started
using diet pills. Well, that really exacerbated my sanity into
a downwards spile. Yeah, so that was really I think
between watching my husband almost he almost died twice in
(04:16):
my first year of recovery, and realizing that I had
to get my own path stabilized instead of focusing on him,
I think was.
Speaker 3 (04:29):
A major step forward for me. So you know, I.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Wasn't I didn't have any pride about being a parent
or a spouse or really proud of my life, and
the path of recovery gave me all of that back.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Amazing. And you know you're helping other people now with
your company Inner Family Healing, So tell us about how
your company helps people get rid of past trauma and hurt.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Well, most of I pretty dominantly work with people with addictions,
but I'm not exclusive to people with addictions.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
So let me start with.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Kind of helping addicts understand because their self respect is
probably the most bruised. Is We're going to find a
bottom line that includes, no matter what, no matter what,
we're going to stay away from the addiction. And so
that starts to let us wake up in the morning
(05:32):
with some self respect building. I didn't realize that at
the time, but integrity is one of the most major
spiritual principles we can live by. So I decided to
say to myself, I want to be a woman I
respect no matter what, I'm not going to pick up
those addictions. That again started to open the door, so
(05:55):
I help people with addictions have that in place. First,
with people who don't have addictions, I try to guide them,
as you probably could tell from the book, into spending
some time really working on what their spiritual and heart
beliefs are. I've worked with people who are Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Jews.
(06:21):
You know, it doesn't matter. What matters is that you
find a spiritual foundation that really resonates at your own
heart level. That way, the person starts to become again
the parent that those younger selves need yearn foreign deserve.
(06:41):
When that is stabilized, they do start to show up
in our meditation, hoping that we can guide them to
letting go of self rejection, self loathing, self hate because
they're trusting us. We are building the trust that a
parent needs to build to be a guiding force in
(07:05):
any younger child's life. So it's an inner process of
building that trust and then trusting that the individual's unique
path that when they show up, will be guided. So,
as you probably know, in my model, I encourage people
not only to have that solid foundation of their own
(07:27):
kind of heart wisdom, but I encourage them to believe
that there are future cells that can help raise these
kids to healthy levels. So, you know the old saying
it takes a village to raise a child. We build
our own internal village from you know future. So I
was thirty at the time, and I'll be eighty two
(07:49):
in a couple of months. So I started visualizing future
selves that had more wisdom than I had at the moment,
had more self respect at the moment. And then I
started bringing them in and my younger selves love having
all these grandmas And why is women to really count
(08:11):
on as well as me? As I went along, so
was it scary to get started, Yeah, but was it
necessary and was it priceless in the long run?
Speaker 3 (08:23):
Absolutely?
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Yeah, And I think I think that's really interesting that
you know, addictions are tied to self worth and that
makes sense. But you know, if you're not feeling good,
then you turn to these things. But when you return
back to self worth and love, then we're able to
heal ourselves. Right.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
It is the younger selves that developed the dependencies on addictions,
because you know, a twelve year old, an eight year
old of fifteen year old doesn't have the maturity really
to come up with sane and sound solutions, and so
helping them know, we're going to help them find same
and sound, spiritually saved and sound solutions for living and
(09:04):
we are not shoving the addiction at them in times
of crisis or upset or confusion, that we will find
a new way to respond to life. And so that's
an important element I think that happens is there's no
shame about self loathing or self worth. It's like can't
(09:26):
you can't have the maturity at those younger ages, and
you use what's available to you. I do take the
approach that there's a genetic vulnerability with addictions that can
get activated when we're young, and just as oftentimes people
that don't have that genetic vulnerability might have great athletic
(09:49):
abilities and they'll use that to distract from all of
their trauma. Right. Yeah, but particularly, we have developed patterns
of coping with life that have not brought us to
the best place, and helping us break our dependencies on
those old patterns is absolutely key to becoming the person
(10:13):
that we are proud of being.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
And Becky, you're the author of Seeking, Finding Healing, the
Complete Guide of Directed Family Healing. So tell us about
this book and the tools you use to help people,
you know, turn trauma and pain into empowerment.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
Well, I think the kind of what I've been saying about,
because you know, doing the work to become a parent
that our younger selves need. I started recording all of
you know, handwriting all of my meditations after the visualizations,
and my first visualization was to make amends to the
(10:50):
younger selves that I was really sad, that I calm
them by you know, walking down a path that was
would be harmful to any one, and that I'm committed
to becoming the parent that they need. After a few visualizations,
and by the way, I only had the time to
(11:11):
meditate fifteen minutes every other Thursday night. I'd gone back
to school, I had small kids, I'm in my own home,
I did all the housework, et cetera. So I was
surprised at how much healing really happened for having only
that small amount of time. And anyway, after a few months, no,
I'm going to say, you know, three to six weeks
(11:35):
that really wounded. Young Becky showed up, and she showed
up with kind of a shame posture of slumped over
and head down. And I, although she didn't say anything,
I intuitively knew that she was showing me her level
of self loathing. And so my response to her, I
(11:56):
almost froze. But a little five year old old Becky
went over to her in this meditation and tried, she
should have beaten bloody with blood all over, and I
never was beaten, so I knew she was showing me
self rejection, self loathing. And my little five year old
Becky went over and dusted off some of the dried,
(12:17):
caked blood on her face, and I said to her, finally,
there is no justification for that behavior, But there is
no justification for self loathing. And we will find something
valuable about you and we are glad that you showed
up to be part of our inner family. So that's
kind of the framework that I encouraged people to expect
(12:43):
and to have their amends ready to share, have their
wisdom ready to share, and move forward just from that
beginning commitment to them through the zation work and in
the book, I actually wrote out as generically as I
(13:07):
could the kind of the breathing, the setting the stage
for the inner families to show up. And sometimes I've
had clients say, you know, I see myself in a
beautiful mountain cabin and they just stare in the windows,
(13:27):
and then at the end of working together, they're all
dancing in the streets together joyously. So it can start
off with them saying, really, you're really going to do that.
You're really going to be who I need, and if
you keep with the work, it's magical. And I think
(13:48):
you know from my book because I've really been at
this a long time. My forty six year old son,
who was six when I came into recovery, died of
his addiction. At that time, I knew that I needed
(14:08):
to comfort my young mother thirty five to forty five
year old mother who wishes she could have had a
different answer for him, wishes that she could have understood
better how to help him, so on and so forth,
and I just had to let her cry the self
of today, which I was about seventy three at the time,
(14:30):
I knew I had seen the path he was living.
I knew, you know, I wasn't surprised. I loved him
to pieces. I know he loved me. I tried to
roll model recovery for him, freedom for him. So that
was my adult self, but my young mothers needed to
(14:53):
deal with her guilt of what she could have done differently,
how she could have responded differently, and it was my
up to comfort her.
Speaker 1 (15:01):
Yeah, well, I'm so sorry to hear about your son,
and I'm glad that you're using you know, the pain
and to help other people, you know, to help other
people so that doesn't happen to them, and to get
rid of addiction, because it's a horrible thing, right, you know.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
I'm a recent widow as well, and I think realizing
that the balance in life for me, and I think
for a lot of us, is to stay a vulnerable
human and at the same time, I have one foot
in a very sound.
Speaker 3 (15:36):
Trust in the divine order.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
So for me, that was that's the dance that helped
me put the book together after jeff my Son's death.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
And you talk about the spiritual laws and how it's
helped you on your recovery, and it also helps your
clients talk about these spiritual laws and what they are.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Well, it's the spiritual principles of gratitude and kind and
compassion and love and patience and gratitude. You know that
there's so many spiritual principles that can guide us to
live differently. So I remember when I was early in
my recovery, I had a woman who was ahead of
me and her recovery, and she said, Becky, in times
(16:18):
of confusion, upset, you know whatever, do not do what
you would do. I want you to make a list
of three to five women you admire and respect. Pick
one of them, do what you think they would do.
And I was able to access a level of wisdom
I didn't feel I had, and that opened.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
The door to future sembles. After a few.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Months of doing that, you know, pulling the name up
of women I admired, I decided I could just call them,
you know, my older Becky's. So, but those spiritual principles
are the guiding force and they operate again under any
religious dogma of kindness and compassion and gratitude and patience
(17:04):
and acceptance. Yeah, so as opposed to spiritual laws, I
think that just spiritual principles is the best word or phrase.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
Yeah, absolutely, I mean love, compassion. You know, they even
show that the energies are the highest on the pyramid, right,
those are the ones that radiate the highest frequencies too, right,
so it make rise to go back to that. And
you also have a social model recovery home for women
with addictions or tell us about that as well.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
This was back in nineteen eighty six and a group
of women in recovery struggling with some of them wanted
me to move down to San Diego and open up
this recovery home. And so took a little doing, but
after a while I got down there, and it was
a twelve step social model, so that the women all
(18:02):
had an opportunity to keep connections to any therapist they
were working with. We didn't make them come in and
use our therapy, but we wanted them to have a
twelve step model of living. From spiritual principles and putting,
as I say, the plug and the jug on any addiction,
and that was a safe environment for them to start
(18:23):
doing their own inner work. And that's when I would
do morning meditations with the group, invite them to understand
that this healing is possible, that they can become the parent.
It was through all women, they can become the mother
that these younger selves need. So yeah, I was the
(18:43):
executive director there for a few years and then I
left and did some other things, but it was a
magical program.
Speaker 3 (18:51):
I'm still in.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
Touch with the woman who was our first resident. She
had been a binge vomitter followed by one hundred laxatives
a day. She'd been hospitalized I think four times, and
this September she'll celebrate forty years of abstinence from her
eating addiction. And I'm still in touch with her, and
(19:15):
I'm still in touch with one of the or two
of the volunteers.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Something that you're helping so many people with your work,
And speaking of helping people, you know, I created my
platform to inspire, to uplift and really to showcase anything
as possible. So Bucky, you know, for anyone that's having
a rough time. You know, maybe it's addiction, maybe it's
just you know, not being in a good place in
life and they're feeling unmotivated. What would you say to
inspire to blift that.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
That there is hope for change, There is hope to
re establish a sense of self respect. Is it going
to take work?
Speaker 3 (19:48):
You bet it is? But is worth the work? Worth it?
You bet?
Speaker 2 (19:54):
It is priceless. Somebody asked me one time, what do
you think you've taught your children, you know, growing up?
And I thought, what a great question, And I wrapped
it up with the only thing any of us ever
take to our grave is our opinion of ourself. And
we can recoup a wonderful opinion of ourselves, not about perfection,
(20:16):
but about willingness to grow and evolve and become the
person the universe is inviting us to be. So they
can go to my website, they can grab the book
I did do the audible version of my two last
books on eating addiction, as well as they and our family,
and so they can go to the website in our
(20:37):
Familyhealing dot com.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
Very nice. We're going to link that information below so
our viewers can learn more about your services. But Becky,
thank you so much for being on the show today.
You know, keep up the amazing work of helping others
because I think it's so needed. Kindness, compassionate love is
so needed in the world right now, right So thank
you for all the work that you're doing, and thank
you for being on the show.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Thank you for all the work you do.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
The dera Rousso is available on Roku, Amazon, bi tv, iHeartRadio,
and Apple Podcasts.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!