December 7, 2024 • 24 mins
After 17 years of love, growth, and navigating life together, we’re inviting you to join us on First Comes Love — a podcast where we share the laughter, the tears, and the profound insights that have shaped our marriage and our lives.We’re not here to pretend we have it all figured out, but through open, authentic conversations, we’ll explore our biggest life lessons, the challenges we’ve overcome, and the strongholds and limiting beliefs we’ve had to break. We believe that putting love first — in everything we do — has been our foundation for living a purposeful life.With Christian undertones and themes, we’ll dive into how our relationship with God has not only sustained our marriage but also strengthened us as individuals. Whether you’re single, married, or somewhere in between, we hope to inspire you to grow, to love deeply, and to walk your own journey with faith and purpose.Come laugh with us, cry with us, and grow with us. Let’s discover together how to make love the cornerstone of everything we do.Follow First Comes Love — because love isn’t just a destination, it’s the beginning of everything.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
All right, it's official. We actually did a thing.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
We are starting our very first podcast called First Comes Love,
and I am really excited about this journey to be
on this experience with you and this ride. It's finally
here that talks about it. Yeah, a lot of talks
and with other people too.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
No, it's been a while like for us to actually
like make this thing come to pass because we've seen
it in our mind's eye for years and years and years,
and it kind of happened on a whim.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
You know, it couldn't be does And we are starting
a podcast already.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
No, oh okay, okay, So he's saying that because I'm
an advocate for people starting their own podcast and my
mantra is started the podcast already. So yeah, I guess
we started the podcast already because that out bumps.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Yeah, Now it's a real thing. So we're super excited.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
So when we think about First Comes Love, we're so
you know, eager to really get this message out to people,
this message of life, love and legacy having some really dynamic, important, insightful,
controversial topics that will be discussing on the show. So
super excited me and John what we bring to the
(01:25):
table for this show.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
First off, First off, ye years of marriage. Years of
marriage early on, I new to this, to this at
the cusp of social media age, the smartphones, is when
we said I do so next year twenty twenty five
will be seventeen years.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yeah, seventeen years married. And then what.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Throughout the military too, Now that's a big piece well,
being married. Yeah, throughout the military.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Oh yeah, that is true.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
And I've seen a lot that have you know, fallen
to the throes of all of the adversity and the
conflicts and all everything that makes it challenging to be
married and the military active duty, and to travel and
to moving and relocating. And we've stuck it through. Yeah,
(02:17):
every year, you're stuck with me. I stuck with you.
And we've got a lot to share. Yeah, a lot
of life lessons about it.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yeah. So with this podcast, there's so many different things
that you know, that we have, like he.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
Said, of just our experience with doing life together for
over a decade now, we have a lot to bring
to the table. So we're really excited to kind of,
I don't know, you know, share what we've learned with
you guys, and hopefully you can get something out of
it can inspire you or encourage you to grow or
to become better. But ultimately to go for this podcast
(02:48):
is for you to be able to be open and
to be susceptible to what God is going to speak
to you through this particular podcast at any given moment,
on any given episode, whatever it is that.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
He's sharing with you, that you take that download.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
And you actually do something with it, and then hopefully
on the other side of you watching an episode, you
can become a better person and a better version of yourself.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
So, yes, we are here to support, lift up, elevate
and promote marriage. Just straight to it. We are proponents
of being married. I personally believe strong conviction that the
marriage is the highest form of a relationship here on earth,
on this side of Heaven. So the things I do
with you, the things that we've experienced, and you know,
(03:38):
what we share, it is literally unlike any other relationship
in in our society, in your whole Walker life, from
you know, from the intimacy, from the companionship, you know,
the shoulder, the shoulder, the you know, being transparent. I
the list can go on and on and on, and
I definitely hope to you know, relay that and convey
(03:58):
that to you all to look at especially nowadays, but
to really look at marriage through a different lens, through
our lens, which is what we're offering and sharing our
viewpoint and experiences about because we're all about marriage.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Yeah, so not just marriage, but we're also going to
talk about life.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
We are also parents. We're gonna talk about legacy. What
does it look like, you know when you think of
life in terms of longevity and relevance and impact.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
So super excited about that.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
But before we you know, let the people go, Let's
give them a little bit more sauce to like who
we are, so our personalities, I will say, you know,
we got married really young. We got married at well,
I was nineteen. I was okay, so yeah, that's a
whole nother story.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
But I was seventeen.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
I was nineteen and we were about to get married
and my mom said, no, that who don't get married
while you're a teenager.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Just wait a couple.
Speaker 3 (04:59):
It's gonna like follow for like the rest of your life.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:02):
So I literally waited like until like two days after
I turned twenty, and then we got married. Which is
easy for John because it's you know, he can remember
our anniversaries literally two days after my birthday.
Speaker 3 (05:13):
That does help it. Literally, we don't do the dog
house thing. That's episode twenty two.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Why you keep saying these numbers of episodes.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
We don't know that I saw it, that really I
saw it. Therefore I was it.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Okay, I forgot John is also a psyche. We left
that big part of Yeah. But yeah, so so we
got married early. Yeah, we got married super early. And
we you know, we get that a lot, like why
did you get married so young? I think we just
betted on ourselves, you know, because when you think about, Okay,
(05:46):
I'm twenty years old, most people think, like, I have
my whole life in front of me.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
I'm not ready to settle down. I know.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
That's kind of what you though when we first met,
is you want before me? Yeah, you weren't looking to
settle down because of like the idea of like I
have so much life to live, like I gotta yeah,
I gotta dabble and do this and that is that,
like you gotta get you know, be in this, gotta
be outside.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
But yeah, I didn't have that thought.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
So I always was like in love with you and
wanted to be committed to.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Not from day one, but episode fourteen.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
But yeah, so somebody's somebody's calling me on my laptop crazy,
who is that? Oh turn my turn my computer off?
Speaker 3 (06:37):
It's still gonna do it?
Speaker 1 (06:39):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Uh yeah, So I'm excited for this, this kind of stuff.
It was gonna happen.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
This is hilarious.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
But anyways, so a lot of people are like, you know,
why get married so young?
Speaker 1 (06:57):
You have so much of your life ahead of you.
But I don't know, like, what was it? Did you?
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Did you have any kind of you know, reservation about
making such a huge commitment at such a young age
and you think it paid off? Because I think a
lot of people Okay, go ahead, I'll let you answer
because I also want to add something to that.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
But did you So.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
I did, but then I didn't because when I when I,
when I filtered the hesitation, I did have through a
real true test of who you was beginning to show
me who you would be obviously for the rest of
my life. But at you know, eighteen nineteen, you know,
when we first boyfriend, girlfriend, and you know, fiance, all
(07:39):
when I strung together all of those indications, you know,
people would say red flags but the flags that you
were beginning to show in the green ones, it made
the decision much easier. And so I went into it
with you know, strong conviction, and of course here we
out the day. But that dissipated very quickly when I
(07:59):
really truly neutrally, you know, really get to assess, Okay,
who are you? Who you be to me as a
as a wife, as my as my lover, as my friend,
as my supporter, my confidante, you know. Part of my legacy,
you know is the kids that were obviously planned to have.
Who would you be as a mother to them? And
then who you represent and who you like showcase and
(08:20):
broadcast yourself as a friend, as you know, as a
co worker. So I I looked at all of those
different attributes and I was like, yeah, I I'll give
up the streets. I'll give up outside so I can
stay inside with you.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
Mm oh, thank you baby.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
Was there was there anything I guess in particular I
I I other.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Than my sauce that you know, swooned you in.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
Was there anything specifically or isolated that you can think
that made you, like you said, kind of come to
the conclusion a lot faster than you may have you know,
thought you would with being able to like settle down.
Speaker 3 (08:56):
So yep, it was your y your growth and development
of your relationship with Christ was further along, and so
I seen how you were delicate at which which all
ultimately at hindsight's twenty twenty, but it ultimately showed me, uh,
even your ability to be submissive, because you know, it's
(09:18):
very evident that your walk with Christ was much further
along than it was for me. Uh. And so l
you know, being able to contemplate how does she does
she belittle me? Does she you know, flaunt her knowledge
you know, of of the Bible and the relationship w
when those things didn't check out, I I can see
myself building you know, a whole life, a whole empire,
(09:41):
you know, uh, building a legacy with you. Yeah. So
it it made it, uh again, like I said, it
made your decision much much much easier.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
And I just had an insight recently, I think l
within this year at least within the last couple of months,
that I actually like added you to the Kingdom of Heaven.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Like I was the like I was the person who.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Hoped you come to Christ not initially and.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
Yo, really no, no, no, it was. It was what
we call it rededication, because of course I did as
I had, my time gave me like this.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
I was so excited about that because I was like, wow,
like you know, as a believer, you're just like.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
I got so.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
Episode seventeen, we're gonna really showcase you all how her
memory does not always serve it well, but it does
make for times just like this.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Yes, I thought I brought you to Christ.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
No no, not initially. No again, I brought you to Christ.
It was probably my cousin, one of my two cousins. Okay, yeah,
that that helped facilitate that, the initial example of what
it should look like. I get courteous to them too, satire,
(11:01):
but the rededication to like take on the mantle and
you know, grab the bull by the horns. It was
definitely your walk. It was definitely your your journey and
your testimony.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
Okay, I take that.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's which I mean. It's equally as important,
but maybe more so because that uh you know, put
more I don't know, more fuel to the fire, more
coal in the fires. Over saying to keep the keep
the fire burning for lifetime.
Speaker 1 (11:27):
I think one of the things that stood out for
me when I first met you.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
That kind of was like that you know stamp, that
kind of was just like, Okay, I want to like
create a foundation here. I feel like we can build
upon where we've started or you know, what exists within
the confines of this relationship.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
That we have. But for me, you were just interesting
in this sense that different.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
I've never dated a Louisiana boy like I will probably
would have never in a million years. That's like another
story on how we met that's gonna be episode.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Yeah, but yeah, yeah, I say, yay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
There would have been like no way under like any
other circum yeah, that I would have met you. But
for me, it was like you were really smart and
even to this day, like a lot of the a
lot of the consistencies and like nuances of who you
are have been like consistent throughout our marriage. And one
(12:28):
of those words that you were just like really grounded
and in who you were, Like you're grounded in the
sense that you were like you were controlled your emotions,
like you seemed like, you know, you're very calm, you're
very easy going, and you seem to be unmoved, not
unnecessarily moved like you're not, you know, like you don't
(12:49):
have emotion, but you seem to be unshaken I guess
by things that most people will get a little shooking
up about all of the different things that we gone
through and been through. And that was like I really
liked it about him, is that you were really smart
and you are really kind, which I feel like is
a very underestimated word, like you are like I was
(13:10):
arguably like one of the kindest people that I know,
and I was just like, you know, it took me
a while to be able to find the word for it,
but you are very very kind, and.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
You've always been really kind to me.
Speaker 2 (13:20):
And that's one of the things that I just have
loved the most about you is that you're a kind person.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
And so no, you're still working on humor. You're not.
You're not that funny, even though this smile right here.
Speaker 3 (13:33):
There we go. That's it. So what I wanted to
ask you brought up a good point in terms of
a womanhood and who you envision how you how you
envision rather your life to be. From that perspective, what
did the ask the attributes that you mentioned, you've been
unshakable you know, immovable and grounded and solid and calm,
(13:57):
et cetera. How did you interpret that as something you
wanted for a lifetime.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Uh, I think that's the safety, you know, it's like
a s a sense of safety.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
I feel like every woman wants to feel like the
man that she's with can make her feel safe and secure.
And I mean before you even jo well, I knew
I met you, like when you had just joined the military.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
You were getting ready to leave her uh, basic training.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
But so obviously there's a level of security there where
it's just like Okay, he's he's you know, started his vocation.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
It's gonna be in the military.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
He's gonna have secure finances, he's gonna have secure medical stuff,
which I didn't know anybody in the military, so I
didn't like have that as my like in the forefront
as far as security, I'm thinking, like I'm barely gonna
see this man or he's gonna travel around the world,
Like this might not work. And so but yeah, I
think I knew that because innately women want to feel
safe and I didn't know, you know, back then, like how.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
Do I actually identify those specific things?
Speaker 2 (14:55):
But I think it was just like an innate, subconscious
aspect to being a woman, being feminine, that you want
to be with somebody and do life with somebody who
makes you feel safe, and like that was one of
the qualities that you had.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Immediately, it's being able to make me feel safe.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
It's been solid.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Yeah, And our story is really interesting. It's had it
has had a lot of ups, a lot of downs,
more up. Yeah, And that's actually what I when people's
you know, when they ask us about our marriage and
how we've been able to be married for so long
and how we've had a successful marriage, because that's how
I define a successful marriage is a marriage that has
(15:36):
more ups than downs.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
And a lot of people have actually successful marriages. They're
just viewing it from an incorrect or fragmented lens, and
so most people do have more ups than downs. It's
just that they have a very again, fragmented and a
distorted view of their marriage, and so they devalue it.
They're not looking at it at the right lens. So
(15:59):
a lot of marriages could actually survive much longer, you
know what, we're proper vision.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
Yeah, hm, that's true. That's a good way of looking
at it, all.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
Right, So what you guys can expect on this podcast,
we're gonna have other couples come on and tell their stories,
share their journeys as a couple, collectively, individually the different
things that they've been through that can hopefully help you
get you know, through some of your obstacles and challenges
that you might be facing today. So definitely looking forward
to connecting with other couples and getting.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Two sides to a story is always like a really
really you know.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Cool and interesting, always learning people, see things, talk different
different experiences, walkways, path in life. Yeah, that usually makes
for a good story. So it's gonna be good.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
And overall I'm excited because I actually one of the
aspects about this podcast that I'm looking forward to the
most is listening. I really like when you talk, because
you teach every time you speak. John has this which
is a good episode, but other spiritual gifts of teaching,
and it's just really really captivating, And so I look
(17:08):
forward to like continuing to learn from you and hear
what you know God speaks to you as we continue
to have these dynamic conversations.
Speaker 3 (17:16):
Yes, yeah, this is the setting, this is the circumstance
of how we're going to actually learn more about each other.
Because when we're doing it in front of people, uh
it is is it going to bring out a different side.
And we are pledging and we're putting forth to effort
to you know, have to be open, transparent, and that
is going to bring out some uh victory, It's gonna
(17:38):
it's gonna bring out another side that you know, allows
us to elevate and progress and and move on, move forward.
So that is to be determined, but it's gonna be
good stuff that we're gonna be able to share new
new bits, some things that will learn new about you
after all this time and then vice versa. So yes,
that's what we can expect.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
Yes. And one of the other things that I definitely am, like.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
I'm so glad that we got married and one of
the reasons that I'm still with you is because of the.
Speaker 3 (18:06):
D Bawn drop a clues bond for that.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
But we're going to talk about everything from sex to infidelity,
to us, to finances, to health and wealth, to.
Speaker 3 (18:22):
Submission in an inner circle.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
Submission. I'm still working on that, you're kind of Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
I feel well ultimately, yet yeah, no, I feel like
I have a lot of work to do in.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
That area, well, I think it's always going to be there.
But I am not threatened. I am not shaken. I'm
not well. That goes back to those I don't view
that as a looming threat to my supremacy, my head
of state.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
What's the biggest area, like within our marriage that you
think I have room for improvement?
Speaker 3 (18:53):
Not using dishwashers so frequent. I just I just I
just want to respectful.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
I just want it's twenty twenty four.
Speaker 3 (19:03):
I just want nice, clean streak, free classes and plates
and dishes and so that's just one.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Okay, let me think what would mind that's no.
Speaker 3 (19:13):
Reciprocating, that's transition.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Anything.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
Let's see the biggest area of improvement for you within
the terms of our marriage.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
Let's see, oh, probably like okay, so.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
Just when we have like a cell if it's a
birthday or like Christmas or something like that, Like just
get the gifts that I'm like asking for.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
I don't like when you try to.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
You're not a good gift giver, Like stop giving gifts
like on your own, like you never have them every time,
and you pump it up and you make it seem
like it's gonna be really good. This time or I'm
gonna really like it, it's gonna be so impressive, and
like almost every time I'm disappointed. So I would say,
for me moving forward, just get me, just please give
me the gifts that I want.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Just give me.
Speaker 3 (20:01):
That's hard because I'm not a robot, like, oh.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
That's yeah, let's just change that. Let's change that little
by little baby steps. But yes, so episode zero, we.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Are so excited for you guys to go on this
journey with us on First comes Love?
Speaker 3 (20:19):
What's the little saying a little? We don't have a slogan, no,
first come love?
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Well, yeah, I mean it's a it's any window.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
To the is it? What do you call it?
Speaker 4 (20:30):
Lullaby? It's not, it's not.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
Wait what is it? First comes loved? Then it's like.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
A it's not a nursery rhyme.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
It's like a joke.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
It's not a joke, but it's like whatever you call it. Anyways,
first comes love, then comes.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Marriage, Then comes the baby in the baby carriage, and.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
That's not all. That's not all.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Then comes the baby drinking that baby. It then comes
to mom drinking alcohol. You don't know that part, that's
like a remix part. Maybe y'all know that part.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
But the framework we essentially did that, which is cool.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Yeah, first comes Love and and it's a foreshadowing to
the ultimate call that we believe God has put on
our lives, which is to love all people.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
The commandment that he gives us is to you obviously
love God and then to love one another as yourself
and so as a very high board because love is
not easy. But so yeah, so first Comes Love is
the name of the game. And when you think about
the idea of what it means to actually love in
(21:36):
the calling that we have on us to love one another,
it's the first thing that should happen.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
So yeah, first Comes Love.
Speaker 4 (21:46):
Thanks peace, dramatic ball, Okay, now stop it.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
Okay, let's do When we're opening, we're saying first comes
like let's are we saying, uh, welcome, like welcome to
First Come First Comes Love podcast together at the same time.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
We gotta do it every time, you know, just this episode,
you're gonna always clip save this all that all they
we do it together and put it.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
Oh no, I'm just doing it's just literally for this episode.
So first Comes Love, Welcome to First Comes Love? On
three Okay, alright, one two three, welcome What are you doing?
Oh yeah, yeah, that set up a little bit.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
You forget your energy if this is literally the first impression.
Speaker 3 (22:42):
Welcome to first podcast.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
And three two one.
Speaker 2 (22:50):
We welcome to First Comes Love podcast. Seem like welcome
for First Comes Love podcasts.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
Okay, one more time one of us, then I like both?
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Okay, three two one.
Speaker 3 (23:07):
Welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Welcome to First Comes Love the Podcast. All right, let's
do it like that. I'll say, I'm your host and Rogers, Yeah,
let's do that.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
And three two one, No, just me, just one of us?
Speaker 3 (23:24):
No, I like both.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
No, that's weird now that I just heard us do it,
and so let's do it.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
I don't think anybody did.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Like, that's the other thing. So just one of us,
all right?
Speaker 2 (23:34):
And three two one, what's going on, everybody? Welcome to
First Comes Love the Podcast.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
I am one half of the hosts of this show,
Niche Rogers.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
And I am John Rogers the second half.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Yes, and this is our new podcast.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
Well, we're gonna talk about life love a legacy.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
I can't wait to have you.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
A life love legacy, a life love legacy, A life
love legacy, A life love legacy.
Speaker 1 (24:14):
A you're supposed to jump in and sing it with me.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
Life looking Legacy life, love, Legacy life, Love and legacy.
Speaker 3 (24:24):
A life, Love and Legacy life Love like tic A ticket.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
All right, good job, we started it.
All right, it's official. We actually did a thing.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
We are starting our very first podcast called First Comes Love,
and I am really excited about this journey to be
on this experience with you and this ride. It's finally
here that talks about it. Yeah, a lot of talks
and with other people too.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
No, it's been a while like for us to actually
like make this thing come to pass because we've seen
it in our mind's eye for years and years and years,
and it kind of happened on a whim.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
You know, it couldn't be does And we are starting
a podcast already.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
No, oh okay, okay, So he's saying that because I'm
an advocate for people starting their own podcast and my
mantra is started the podcast already. So yeah, I guess
we started the podcast already because that out bumps.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Yeah, Now it's a real thing. So we're super excited.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
So when we think about First Comes Love, we're so
you know, eager to really get this message out to people,
this message of life, love and legacy having some really dynamic, important, insightful,
controversial topics that will be discussing on the show. So
super excited me and John what we bring to the
(01:25):
table for this show.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
First off, First off, ye years of marriage. Years of
marriage early on, I new to this, to this at
the cusp of social media age, the smartphones, is when
we said I do so next year twenty twenty five
will be seventeen years.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Yeah, seventeen years married. And then what.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Throughout the military too, Now that's a big piece well,
being married. Yeah, throughout the military.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Oh yeah, that is true.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
And I've seen a lot that have you know, fallen
to the throes of all of the adversity and the
conflicts and all everything that makes it challenging to be
married and the military active duty, and to travel and
to moving and relocating. And we've stuck it through. Yeah,
(02:17):
every year, you're stuck with me. I stuck with you.
And we've got a lot to share. Yeah, a lot
of life lessons about it.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Yeah. So with this podcast, there's so many different things
that you know, that we have, like he.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
Said, of just our experience with doing life together for
over a decade now, we have a lot to bring
to the table. So we're really excited to kind of,
I don't know, you know, share what we've learned with
you guys, and hopefully you can get something out of
it can inspire you or encourage you to grow or
to become better. But ultimately to go for this podcast
(02:48):
is for you to be able to be open and
to be susceptible to what God is going to speak
to you through this particular podcast at any given moment,
on any given episode, whatever it is that.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
He's sharing with you, that you take that download.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
And you actually do something with it, and then hopefully
on the other side of you watching an episode, you
can become a better person and a better version of yourself.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
So, yes, we are here to support, lift up, elevate
and promote marriage. Just straight to it. We are proponents
of being married. I personally believe strong conviction that the
marriage is the highest form of a relationship here on earth,
on this side of Heaven. So the things I do
with you, the things that we've experienced, and you know,
(03:38):
what we share, it is literally unlike any other relationship
in in our society, in your whole Walker life, from
you know, from the intimacy, from the companionship, you know,
the shoulder, the shoulder, the you know, being transparent. I
the list can go on and on and on, and
I definitely hope to you know, relay that and convey
(03:58):
that to you all to look at especially nowadays, but
to really look at marriage through a different lens, through
our lens, which is what we're offering and sharing our
viewpoint and experiences about because we're all about marriage.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Yeah, so not just marriage, but we're also going to
talk about life.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
We are also parents. We're gonna talk about legacy. What
does it look like, you know when you think of
life in terms of longevity and relevance and impact.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
So super excited about that.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
But before we you know, let the people go, Let's
give them a little bit more sauce to like who
we are, so our personalities, I will say, you know,
we got married really young. We got married at well,
I was nineteen. I was okay, so yeah, that's a
whole nother story.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
But I was seventeen.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
I was nineteen and we were about to get married
and my mom said, no, that who don't get married
while you're a teenager.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Just wait a couple.
Speaker 3 (04:59):
It's gonna like follow for like the rest of your life.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:02):
So I literally waited like until like two days after
I turned twenty, and then we got married. Which is
easy for John because it's you know, he can remember
our anniversaries literally two days after my birthday.
Speaker 3 (05:13):
That does help it. Literally, we don't do the dog
house thing. That's episode twenty two.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Why you keep saying these numbers of episodes.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
We don't know that I saw it, that really I
saw it. Therefore I was it.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Okay, I forgot John is also a psyche. We left
that big part of Yeah. But yeah, so so we
got married early. Yeah, we got married super early. And
we you know, we get that a lot, like why
did you get married so young? I think we just
betted on ourselves, you know, because when you think about, Okay,
(05:46):
I'm twenty years old, most people think, like, I have
my whole life in front of me.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
I'm not ready to settle down. I know.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
That's kind of what you though when we first met,
is you want before me? Yeah, you weren't looking to
settle down because of like the idea of like I
have so much life to live, like I gotta yeah,
I gotta dabble and do this and that is that,
like you gotta get you know, be in this, gotta
be outside.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
But yeah, I didn't have that thought.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
So I always was like in love with you and
wanted to be committed to.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Not from day one, but episode fourteen.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
But yeah, so somebody's somebody's calling me on my laptop crazy,
who is that? Oh turn my turn my computer off?
Speaker 3 (06:37):
It's still gonna do it?
Speaker 1 (06:39):
I don't.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Uh yeah, So I'm excited for this, this kind of stuff.
It was gonna happen.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
This is hilarious.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
But anyways, so a lot of people are like, you know,
why get married so young?
Speaker 1 (06:57):
You have so much of your life ahead of you.
But I don't know, like, what was it? Did you?
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Did you have any kind of you know, reservation about
making such a huge commitment at such a young age
and you think it paid off? Because I think a
lot of people Okay, go ahead, I'll let you answer
because I also want to add something to that.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
But did you So.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
I did, but then I didn't because when I when I,
when I filtered the hesitation, I did have through a
real true test of who you was beginning to show
me who you would be obviously for the rest of
my life. But at you know, eighteen nineteen, you know,
when we first boyfriend, girlfriend, and you know, fiance, all
(07:39):
when I strung together all of those indications, you know,
people would say red flags but the flags that you
were beginning to show in the green ones, it made
the decision much easier. And so I went into it
with you know, strong conviction, and of course here we
out the day. But that dissipated very quickly when I
(07:59):
really truly neutrally, you know, really get to assess, Okay,
who are you? Who you be to me as a
as a wife, as my as my lover, as my friend,
as my supporter, my confidante, you know. Part of my legacy,
you know is the kids that were obviously planned to have.
Who would you be as a mother to them? And
then who you represent and who you like showcase and
(08:20):
broadcast yourself as a friend, as you know, as a
co worker. So I I looked at all of those
different attributes and I was like, yeah, I I'll give
up the streets. I'll give up outside so I can
stay inside with you.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
Mm oh, thank you baby.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
Was there was there anything I guess in particular I
I I other.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Than my sauce that you know, swooned you in.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
Was there anything specifically or isolated that you can think
that made you, like you said, kind of come to
the conclusion a lot faster than you may have you know,
thought you would with being able to like settle down.
Speaker 3 (08:56):
So yep, it was your y your growth and development
of your relationship with Christ was further along, and so
I seen how you were delicate at which which all
ultimately at hindsight's twenty twenty, but it ultimately showed me, uh,
even your ability to be submissive, because you know, it's
(09:18):
very evident that your walk with Christ was much further
along than it was for me. Uh. And so l
you know, being able to contemplate how does she does
she belittle me? Does she you know, flaunt her knowledge
you know, of of the Bible and the relationship w
when those things didn't check out, I I can see
myself building you know, a whole life, a whole empire,
(09:41):
you know, uh, building a legacy with you. Yeah. So
it it made it, uh again, like I said, it
made your decision much much much easier.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
And I just had an insight recently, I think l
within this year at least within the last couple of months,
that I actually like added you to the Kingdom of Heaven.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Like I was the like I was the person who.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Hoped you come to Christ not initially and.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
Yo, really no, no, no, it was. It was what
we call it rededication, because of course I did as
I had, my time gave me like this.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
I was so excited about that because I was like, wow,
like you know, as a believer, you're just like.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
I got so.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
Episode seventeen, we're gonna really showcase you all how her
memory does not always serve it well, but it does
make for times just like this.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Yes, I thought I brought you to Christ.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
No no, not initially. No again, I brought you to Christ.
It was probably my cousin, one of my two cousins. Okay, yeah,
that that helped facilitate that, the initial example of what
it should look like. I get courteous to them too, satire,
(11:01):
but the rededication to like take on the mantle and
you know, grab the bull by the horns. It was
definitely your walk. It was definitely your your journey and
your testimony.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
Okay, I take that.
Speaker 3 (11:11):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's which I mean. It's equally as important,
but maybe more so because that uh you know, put
more I don't know, more fuel to the fire, more
coal in the fires. Over saying to keep the keep
the fire burning for lifetime.
Speaker 1 (11:27):
I think one of the things that stood out for
me when I first met you.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
That kind of was like that you know stamp, that
kind of was just like, Okay, I want to like
create a foundation here. I feel like we can build
upon where we've started or you know, what exists within
the confines of this relationship.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
That we have. But for me, you were just interesting
in this sense that different.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
I've never dated a Louisiana boy like I will probably
would have never in a million years. That's like another
story on how we met that's gonna be episode.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Yeah, but yeah, yeah, I say, yay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
There would have been like no way under like any
other circum yeah, that I would have met you. But
for me, it was like you were really smart and
even to this day, like a lot of the a
lot of the consistencies and like nuances of who you
are have been like consistent throughout our marriage. And one
(12:28):
of those words that you were just like really grounded
and in who you were, Like you're grounded in the
sense that you were like you were controlled your emotions,
like you seemed like, you know, you're very calm, you're
very easy going, and you seem to be unmoved, not
unnecessarily moved like you're not, you know, like you don't
(12:49):
have emotion, but you seem to be unshaken I guess
by things that most people will get a little shooking
up about all of the different things that we gone
through and been through. And that was like I really
liked it about him, is that you were really smart
and you are really kind, which I feel like is
a very underestimated word, like you are like I was
(13:10):
arguably like one of the kindest people that I know,
and I was just like, you know, it took me
a while to be able to find the word for it,
but you are very very kind, and.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
You've always been really kind to me.
Speaker 2 (13:20):
And that's one of the things that I just have
loved the most about you is that you're a kind person.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
And so no, you're still working on humor. You're not.
You're not that funny, even though this smile right here.
Speaker 3 (13:33):
There we go. That's it. So what I wanted to
ask you brought up a good point in terms of
a womanhood and who you envision how you how you
envision rather your life to be. From that perspective, what
did the ask the attributes that you mentioned, you've been
unshakable you know, immovable and grounded and solid and calm,
(13:57):
et cetera. How did you interpret that as something you
wanted for a lifetime.
Speaker 1 (14:03):
Uh, I think that's the safety, you know, it's like
a s a sense of safety.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
I feel like every woman wants to feel like the
man that she's with can make her feel safe and secure.
And I mean before you even jo well, I knew
I met you, like when you had just joined the military.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
You were getting ready to leave her uh, basic training.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
But so obviously there's a level of security there where
it's just like Okay, he's he's you know, started his vocation.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
It's gonna be in the military.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
He's gonna have secure finances, he's gonna have secure medical stuff,
which I didn't know anybody in the military, so I
didn't like have that as my like in the forefront
as far as security, I'm thinking, like I'm barely gonna
see this man or he's gonna travel around the world,
Like this might not work. And so but yeah, I
think I knew that because innately women want to feel
safe and I didn't know, you know, back then, like how.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
Do I actually identify those specific things?
Speaker 2 (14:55):
But I think it was just like an innate, subconscious
aspect to being a woman, being feminine, that you want
to be with somebody and do life with somebody who
makes you feel safe, and like that was one of
the qualities that you had.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Immediately, it's being able to make me feel safe.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
It's been solid.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Yeah, And our story is really interesting. It's had it
has had a lot of ups, a lot of downs,
more up. Yeah, And that's actually what I when people's
you know, when they ask us about our marriage and
how we've been able to be married for so long
and how we've had a successful marriage, because that's how
I define a successful marriage is a marriage that has
(15:36):
more ups than downs.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
And a lot of people have actually successful marriages. They're
just viewing it from an incorrect or fragmented lens, and
so most people do have more ups than downs. It's
just that they have a very again, fragmented and a
distorted view of their marriage, and so they devalue it.
They're not looking at it at the right lens. So
(15:59):
a lot of marriages could actually survive much longer, you
know what, we're proper vision.
Speaker 1 (16:03):
Yeah, hm, that's true. That's a good way of looking
at it, all.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
Right, So what you guys can expect on this podcast,
we're gonna have other couples come on and tell their stories,
share their journeys as a couple, collectively, individually the different
things that they've been through that can hopefully help you
get you know, through some of your obstacles and challenges
that you might be facing today. So definitely looking forward
to connecting with other couples and getting.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Two sides to a story is always like a really
really you know.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
Cool and interesting, always learning people, see things, talk different
different experiences, walkways, path in life. Yeah, that usually makes
for a good story. So it's gonna be good.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
And overall I'm excited because I actually one of the
aspects about this podcast that I'm looking forward to the
most is listening. I really like when you talk, because
you teach every time you speak. John has this which
is a good episode, but other spiritual gifts of teaching,
and it's just really really captivating, And so I look
(17:08):
forward to like continuing to learn from you and hear
what you know God speaks to you as we continue
to have these dynamic conversations.
Speaker 3 (17:16):
Yes, yeah, this is the setting, this is the circumstance
of how we're going to actually learn more about each other.
Because when we're doing it in front of people, uh
it is is it going to bring out a different side.
And we are pledging and we're putting forth to effort
to you know, have to be open, transparent, and that
is going to bring out some uh victory, It's gonna
(17:38):
it's gonna bring out another side that you know, allows
us to elevate and progress and and move on, move forward.
So that is to be determined, but it's gonna be
good stuff that we're gonna be able to share new
new bits, some things that will learn new about you
after all this time and then vice versa. So yes,
that's what we can expect.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
Yes. And one of the other things that I definitely am, like.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
I'm so glad that we got married and one of
the reasons that I'm still with you is because of the.
Speaker 3 (18:06):
D Bawn drop a clues bond for that.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
But we're going to talk about everything from sex to infidelity,
to us, to finances, to health and wealth, to.
Speaker 3 (18:22):
Submission in an inner circle.
Speaker 1 (18:25):
Submission. I'm still working on that, you're kind of Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
I feel well ultimately, yet yeah, no, I feel like
I have a lot of work to do in.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
That area, well, I think it's always going to be there.
But I am not threatened. I am not shaken. I'm
not well. That goes back to those I don't view
that as a looming threat to my supremacy, my head
of state.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
What's the biggest area, like within our marriage that you
think I have room for improvement?
Speaker 3 (18:53):
Not using dishwashers so frequent. I just I just I
just want to respectful.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
I just want it's twenty twenty four.
Speaker 3 (19:03):
I just want nice, clean streak, free classes and plates
and dishes and so that's just one.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Okay, let me think what would mind that's no.
Speaker 3 (19:13):
Reciprocating, that's transition.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Anything.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
Let's see the biggest area of improvement for you within
the terms of our marriage.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
Let's see, oh, probably like okay, so.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
Just when we have like a cell if it's a
birthday or like Christmas or something like that, Like just
get the gifts that I'm like asking for.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
I don't like when you try to.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
You're not a good gift giver, Like stop giving gifts
like on your own, like you never have them every time,
and you pump it up and you make it seem
like it's gonna be really good. This time or I'm
gonna really like it, it's gonna be so impressive, and
like almost every time I'm disappointed. So I would say,
for me moving forward, just get me, just please give
me the gifts that I want.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Just give me.
Speaker 3 (20:01):
That's hard because I'm not a robot, like, oh.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
That's yeah, let's just change that. Let's change that little
by little baby steps. But yes, so episode zero, we.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Are so excited for you guys to go on this
journey with us on First comes Love?
Speaker 3 (20:19):
What's the little saying a little? We don't have a slogan, no,
first come love?
Speaker 1 (20:25):
Well, yeah, I mean it's a it's any window.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
To the is it? What do you call it?
Speaker 4 (20:30):
Lullaby? It's not, it's not.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
Wait what is it? First comes loved? Then it's like.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
A it's not a nursery rhyme.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
It's like a joke.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
It's not a joke, but it's like whatever you call it. Anyways,
first comes love, then comes.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Marriage, Then comes the baby in the baby carriage, and.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
That's not all. That's not all.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Then comes the baby drinking that baby. It then comes
to mom drinking alcohol. You don't know that part, that's
like a remix part. Maybe y'all know that part.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
But the framework we essentially did that, which is cool.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Yeah, first comes Love and and it's a foreshadowing to
the ultimate call that we believe God has put on
our lives, which is to love all people.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
The commandment that he gives us is to you obviously
love God and then to love one another as yourself
and so as a very high board because love is
not easy. But so yeah, so first Comes Love is
the name of the game. And when you think about
the idea of what it means to actually love in
(21:36):
the calling that we have on us to love one another,
it's the first thing that should happen.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
So yeah, first Comes Love.
Speaker 4 (21:46):
Thanks peace, dramatic ball, Okay, now stop it.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
Okay, let's do When we're opening, we're saying first comes
like let's are we saying, uh, welcome, like welcome to
First Come First Comes Love podcast together at the same time.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
We gotta do it every time, you know, just this episode,
you're gonna always clip save this all that all they
we do it together and put it.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
Oh no, I'm just doing it's just literally for this episode.
So first Comes Love, Welcome to First Comes Love? On
three Okay, alright, one two three, welcome What are you doing?
Oh yeah, yeah, that set up a little bit.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
You forget your energy if this is literally the first impression.
Speaker 3 (22:42):
Welcome to first podcast.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
And three two one.
Speaker 2 (22:50):
We welcome to First Comes Love podcast. Seem like welcome
for First Comes Love podcasts.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
Okay, one more time one of us, then I like both?
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Okay, three two one.
Speaker 3 (23:07):
Welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Welcome to First Comes Love the Podcast. All right, let's
do it like that. I'll say, I'm your host and Rogers, Yeah,
let's do that.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
And three two one, No, just me, just one of us?
Speaker 3 (23:24):
No, I like both.
Speaker 1 (23:25):
No, that's weird now that I just heard us do it,
and so let's do it.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
I don't think anybody did.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Like, that's the other thing. So just one of us,
all right?
Speaker 2 (23:34):
And three two one, what's going on, everybody? Welcome to
First Comes Love the Podcast.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
I am one half of the hosts of this show,
Niche Rogers.
Speaker 3 (23:50):
And I am John Rogers the second half.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Yes, and this is our new podcast.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
Well, we're gonna talk about life love a legacy.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
I can't wait to have you.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
A life love legacy, a life love legacy, A life
love legacy, A life love legacy.
Speaker 1 (24:14):
A you're supposed to jump in and sing it with me.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
Life looking Legacy life, love, Legacy life, Love and legacy.
Speaker 3 (24:24):
A life, Love and Legacy life Love like tic A ticket.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
All right, good job, we started it.
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