The Scum Kings

The Scum Kings

Meet the Scum Kings, a dysfunctional band of bottom-feeding marauders led by the ruthless Giddray 'Dray'. They are not clever masterminds or noble rebels. They are a pack of beaten dogs, driven by hunger and greed, whose every attempt at villainy seems to end in fresh wounds and humiliating failure. They are the fever in a sick world, a symptom of the rot. The Scum Kings is a daily, short-form, serial grimdark fantasy audiobook told from the perspective of their captain. Each 5-15 minute episode is a ground-level chronicle of survival, following the crew through their desperate heists, ugly victories, and insane gambles. Defeated. Desperate. Driven. Created and written by Mike Daltrey

Episodes

Retreat

August 31, 2025 • 9 mins
A simple caravan raid turns into a bloody rout. With two men dead and their toughest fighter bleeding out, the Scum Kings are forced to flee into the dark woods with nothing to show for their failure but a single, useless captive. As the crew licks their wounds, their leader, Dray, is confronted with a grim accounting: they are poorer, more desperate, and have lost more than just blood.

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The Naming

September 2, 2025 • 8 mins
In the grey light of dawn, blame for the failed raid boils over into a direct challenge against Dray's leadership. To maintain control, the captain's response must be swift, brutal, and public. With his authority re-established through violence, a moment of grim camaraderie around a fire gives the broken crew a new, ugly, and perfect name to rally behind.

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The Captive

September 3, 2025 • 7 mins
With no leads and dwindling hope, Dray gives their captive to Gix, the crew's master of cruelty. The interrogation that follows is not a session of shouting and broken bones, but a quiet, psychological game played with a feather, a piece of glass, and a dead hornet. As Gix shreds the prisoner's sanity, it becomes clear he knows nothing, and the Scum Kings have no use for a worthless captive.

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The Hunger

September 4, 2025 • 6 mins
Starvation has reduced the Scum Kings to a shadow of themselves. A grim choice is presented by Orso: a humiliating retreat to beg for scraps, or a suicidal push deeper into the unknown. As Dray's pride clashes with Orso's logic, their best hunter, Brynn, returns from a two-day search with a seemingly worthless prize... and the look of a predator who has found much bigger prey.

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Planning

September 5, 2025 • 7 mins
Brynn's great discovery is revealed: not a rich caravan, but a single, fat pig on a tiny farm. Driven by starvation, the Scum Kings swallow their pride and plan the theft with the tactical precision of a military siege. As Orso finalizes the absurdly detailed plan for their two-structure assault, an unexpected sound from the valley threatens to turn their pathetic masterpiece into another humiliating failure.

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The Scum Kings Friday Binge - Episodes 1-5

September 5, 2025 • 38 mins
This is a episode range binge compilation containing 5 episodes.

Episodes included:
1. Retreat (August 31, 2025)
2. The Naming (September 02, 2025)
3. The Captive (September 03, 2025)
4. The Hunger (September 04, 2025)
5. Planning (September 05, 2025)

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Episode 1: Retreat
A simple caravan raid turns into a bloody rout. With two men dead and their toughest fighter bleeding out, the Scum Kings are forced to flee into the dark woods with not...
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Heist

September 8, 2025 • 6 mins
The Scum Kings' meticulously planned raid on the farm collapses into a chaotic brawl the moment it begins. Faced with a surprisingly fierce defense from two old farmers armed with a pitchfork and a frying pan, the glorious heist becomes a pathetic, muddy mess. When brute force fails to end the fight, Gix resorts to a moment of shocking cruelty to break their spirit, securing the prize and a much-needed victory.

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The King's Portion

September 9, 2025 • 5 mins
With a butcher's reverence, Cob prepares a feast fit for kings. The smell of roasting pork fills the camp, a torturous promise of salvation for the starving mercenaries. When the meat is finally ready, civility is abandoned. But as one member breaks rank to snatch the first piece, Dray enforces the only law that matters with brutal finality: the King eats first.

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A Moment of Weakness

September 10, 2025 • 6 mins
Planning his next kill, Dray finds a starving woman and child hiding in the woods; another problem to be ignored or eliminated. But the child's haunted eyes provoke a rare and unwanted feeling: pity. Dray's reaction is an act of mercy, disguised as cruelty and followed by a wave of fury at his own weakness.

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Sorting Things Out

September 11, 2025 • 5 mins
Disgusted by his own moment of weakness, Dray needs to remind his crew—and himself—of his brutality. A casual remark from Gix provides the perfect excuse for a sudden, violent outburst. The savage beating is meant to purge Dray's shame, but Gix's blood-soaked, knowing smile in the aftermath is a chilling confirmation that he and his king speak the same dark language.

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The Bottom of the Barrel

September 12, 2025 • 5 mins
The victory of the feast has soured. Staring into a fireless pit, Dray is confronted by his lieutenants with the cold, hard facts of their survival. They need a score, any score, now. The only available target is the most shameful one imaginable, and for a crew that calls themselves kings, robbing a lone priest is an admission of what they truly are: the bottom of the barrel.

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The Scum Kings Friday Binge - Episodes 6-10

September 12, 2025 • 29 mins
This is a episode range binge compilation containing 5 episodes.

Episodes included:
1. Heist (September 08, 2025)
2. The King's Portion (September 09, 2025)
3. A Moment of Weakness (September 10, 2025)
4. Sorting Things Out (September 11, 2025)
5. The Bottom of the Barrel (September 12, 2025)

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Episode 1: Heist
The Scum Kings' meticulously planned raid on the farm collapses into a chaotic brawl the moment it begins. Faced with a surprisin...
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The One-Eyed Priest

September 15, 2025 • 8 mins
Determined to avoid another chaotic brawl, the Scum Kings attempt a silent, meticulously planned heist on the lone priest. A decoy draws him out, and their best scout slips into the shrine unseen. The plan is perfect. But the prize is chained down, and the priest is not what he seems. When he reveals he knew their every move from the start, the crew's brilliant plan becomes a humiliating failure, leaving only one option left: brute...
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The Mugging

September 16, 2025 • 4 mins
The time for tricks is over. Led by Stigand's brute force, the Scum Kings unleash their fury on the shrine and the one-eyed priest, tearing the place apart to claim their prize. But when the donation box is finally ripped from the floor and broken open, the "treasure" within is a bitter joke, and the only one left laughing is their victim.

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A New Road

September 17, 2025 • 6 mins
Haunted by the priest's laughter and drowning in their own shame, the Scum Kings abandon their camp. Cornered and out of options, Orso unrolls a map and lays bare the brutal logic of their predicament. With a rope waiting in the north and a wall of mountains in the west, there is only one path that isn't explicitly suicidal: a long, miserable march south through desolation to find a forgotten road.

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The Ambush

September 18, 2025 • 5 mins
After a five-day march through desolation, the Scum Kings finally reach the forgotten road. Renewed with purpose, they set a perfect ambush and settle in to wait for their prey. But as the hours crawl by under a baking sun, hope sours into doubt. Just as Dray is about to admit another failure, a sharp hiss from their lookout signals that the long, silent wait is finally over.

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A Hollow Victory

September 19, 2025 • 5 mins
The lone traveler is not a rich merchant, but a simple, elderly pilgrim. When the ambush is sprung, the old man fights back with surprising skill and a strange, weary sadness, showing no fear of his attackers. The fight becomes a cruel game until Dray steps in to end it with a single, brutal blow. But as the crew stands over the body in the dying light, the silence is deafening. For the first time, a victory feels entirely hollow.

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The Scum Kings Friday Binge - Episodes 11-15

September 19, 2025 • 31 mins
This is a episode range binge compilation containing 5 episodes.

Episodes included:
1. The One-Eyed Priest (September 15, 2025)
2. The Mugging (September 16, 2025)
3. A New Road (September 17, 2025)
4. The Ambush (September 18, 2025)
5. A Hollow Victory (September 19, 2025)

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Episode 1: The One-Eyed Priest
Determined to avoid another chaotic brawl, the Scum Kings attempt a silent, meticulously planned heist on the lone priest. A decoy dra...
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The Worthless Icon

September 22, 2025 • 4 mins
The victory over the pilgrim feels hollow and shameful, until Silayne searches the body. In a hidden pocket, she finds not coppers, but a heavy pouch of silver coins—enough to change everything. The crew's despair instantly turns to celebration, the murder justified by the prize. But as they rejoice, Dray is drawn to another, "worthless" item from the pilgrim's robes, an object that fills him with a cold sense of foreboding.

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The Weight of Silver

September 23, 2025 • 5 mins
The silver coins have bought the Scum Kings a future, sparking a manic celebration. But the joy is cut short when Silayne takes command, explaining the danger of their newfound wealth. The southern coins are a dead giveaway, and spending them carelessly means a death sentence. As she establishes herself as the company's sole treasurer, a new, more disciplined future for the crew begins to take shape.

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