May 17, 2026 • 9 mins
🎤 PODCAST: My Increasing Dementia ~ How can I enjoy my remaining short life?
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#i_am_dying #dementia #happiness #death #relationships #family #emotions #counseling #mental_health #self_help #objectivism #stress #therapy #psychology
Dr. Kenner's public service broadcast is in its 27th year.
Free Relationship Advice
Download chapter one of Dr. Kenner’s romance guidebook for free at https://www.drkenner.com
• This episode is at https://bit.ly/3PUeJiN
• Hundreds of podcasts sorted by topic https://bit.ly/3qh6BX7
✦ Free Relationship Advice ~ download chapter one of Dr. Kenner’s romance guidebook for free at https://www.drkenner.com
• Listen to caller's personal dramas four times each week
#i_am_dying #dementia #happiness #death #relationships #family #emotions #counseling #mental_health #self_help #objectivism #stress #therapy #psychology
Dr. Kenner's public service broadcast is in its 27th year.
Free Relationship Advice
Download chapter one of Dr. Kenner’s romance guidebook for free at https://www.drkenner.com
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
The Selfish Pats or Romance. Download chapter one for free
at doctor Kenner dot com and at Amazon dot com.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Robert, you're dealing with some medical issues.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
Yes, doctor Kenner. I'm gonna read this off fast. Okay,
I'm scared on the phone. Self diagnosis is a phone
phobia from my work in Vietnam as a radio operator,
where I heard things in combat one month after I
turned nineteen.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Okay, you can slow it down a little.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Married forty one years, no marital issues, Wow, congratulations, thank you.
And my problem is how to deal with medical issues.
My psychology primary diagnosis is combat PTSD total and permanent
(00:49):
Vietnam with the Marines medical. Heading to the computer room
in May, I found myself on my back on the floor,
legs of the top of the two stairs, and egg
size lump on the back of the head. Don't know
if I was out seconds or minutes, No big deal.
Got myself up.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Wait a minute, did you see a doctor about that?
Because you're saying you lost consciousness right.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Well, I'm coming to that, okay. Got myself up, went
to sit on the couch in the living room. Got
up after half an hour or so to go to
the studio. To do some work, got as far as
the door, so dizzy I knew I had to sit
down on the floor. No warning of the fall, no
memory of it. Let it go for two weeks. Finally
(01:36):
Linda took me to the va er CT scan of
the brain. Full blood work, Everything okay. All blood work
is normal, if not excellent. Lung lung function is normal.
How's this for blood pressure? One O six over sixty five?
But the diagnosis dementia. First question I had was have
(02:01):
anything to do with my past drinking career? No, just
luck of the draw quote.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Wait a minute, Wait a minute, I'm losing you here.
Let me sum up when I'm hearing so far, Robert,
so we make sure I'm on the same page with you.
Is that you know you have some post traumatic stress
disorder from having served in the Marines in sixty eight
and seventy correct, And you know that being on the
phone can be scary for you because that's where you
(02:30):
heard some of the trauma during the war. Right, you
were a phone operator or you worked in that capacity,
so you know that that is a trigger for you.
The second issue that I'm hearing is that more recently,
when was this when Linda took you in. Was that
a few months ago? Okay, so it's more recent that
(02:53):
you had a loss of consciousness and you actually hurt yourself.
I did that once myself. I was getting out of
a chair and the next thing I know, I had
a bruise on my head. I had gone unconscious, and
so I went through the battery of testament through some
monitor that they had on me from my heart, and
I was very lucky. It turned out healthy. It you know,
it just turned out I have very low blood pressure.
(03:13):
In your case, sounds like it turned out that you
got a clean bill of mental I mean of physical health.
But they told you you had dementia based on.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
What hey, I got to interrupt this because we've got
to pay some bills.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
Thirty seconds.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
That's it, A very quick ad and then Ellen will
be back.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
Romance. Oh, I wish guys knew more about what we
want from a relationship. Boy, I wish I knew more
about what I want. Where's that ad? I saw? Ah?
Here it is The Selfish Path to Romance, a serious
romance guidebook. Download chapter one for free at selfish romance
(03:51):
dot com and buy it at Amazon dot com. Hmm,
The selfish path to romance. That is interesting.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Got a clean bill of mental I mean of physical health.
But they told you you had dementia based on what the.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
CT scan showed, global atrophy of the brain.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (04:15):
And she said, in other words, I was born with it,
but nobody, no one in my family had a history
of this.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
Okay. So so you did you get a second opinion
on that? Or is that what you got? Is what
you got?
Speaker 3 (04:29):
That's what I got. Can I can't afford a second
opinion except for the VA that's where all my Okay?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
So given that, what is your main question for me?
Because I know we're down to three minutes.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Oh, let's see. Uh uh, well, just how how do
I deal with the I mean, there's a whole host
of medical issues I didn't I couldn't mention in time.
How do I deal with these miracles? Okay?
Speaker 2 (05:03):
If I got a slew of bad medical diagnoses, including
one that says that I might be declining in my
cognitive function, my thinking function over time, man, I'm going
to want to make the best of my life. I
got within the capacity of what's possible to me. I'm
going to ask myself the question, and you could do
(05:24):
this daily. What would bring me some pleasure today? That's reasonable.
I mean, obviously you don't want to go out gambling
and you know, nonsense stuff, But what would bring you
some pleasure? Do you have a hobby do you enjoy?
Do you do love doing something with Linda? Could you
build up a couples activity that both of you enjoy
that maybe you've never done before. It could be kayaking,
(05:47):
or it could be I don't know, bowling or dancing
or something that might be fun. It would have to
be something you both enjoy. If you have that hobby already,
could you continue with it? How could you make each
day meaningful to you? Given that you're that you're dealing
with some pretty serious issues. Is the quality of life
(06:09):
that matters? If someone told me I had six months
to live, Robert, I don't know what I do, but
I'm really hoping that I would make the best of
those six months and enjoy whatever life I had.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
Understood.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Thank you, So it's number one. I want to also
congratulate well, so focusing you can. Did something come to mind?
Something you enjoy come to mind?
Speaker 3 (06:38):
Well it's nothing, really, I have no hobbies. Well, building websites,
but my work is I'm a professional artist, and that's
what I can't remember how to I can't even remember
how to use my oil paint.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Oh that's very sad. Try to find something that you
can do within your capacity, because if you try to
do the thing that you've already your mind is not
letting you do anymore, You'll just feel inadequate over and
over and over again. So if you can find something
you can do, you can talk very freely to me.
(07:22):
I'm impressed with the way you're conversing with me, especially
since you have phone phobia. This is phenomenal, This is amazing.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Oh, thank you.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Yes, but look at your strengths. Ask Linda what your
strengths are. Ask yourself, what is still within my capacity
to do? If I couldn't do much, I might watch
them old I love Lucy's and Singing in the Rain,
some happy movies, not traumatizing movies, but things that you
and Linda could both enjoy together. Archie Boker, Archie, Man,
(07:56):
if that works for you, use it. You want to
who My husband's standing up dancing here, so he would
do dancing. I think even if he couldn't remember the steps,
we would still be dancing. So it's realizing that you
do have limitations and living within your limitations to the
fullest that is possible to you. And we're working with
(08:20):
Linda on that and making your life joyous. So listen.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Instead of wrapping your mind around what you can't cannot do,
wrap your mind around what you can do.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
For more Doctor Kenner podcast, go to dr Kenner dot
com and please listen to this. Here's an excerpt from
The Selfish pats or Romance by doctors Kenner and Locke.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
One pitfaill to nurturing your sensual attraction to your partner
is the view that ideal romantic love is separated from
the physical, the idea that true love is unsullied. In
quotes by sex, this era usually goes by the name
platonic love. In this view, the body is low and corrupt.
Thus the highest form of romantic love is purely spiritual,
(09:06):
something floating and ethereal. Platonic love, however, is not romantic love.
In a truly romantic relationship, you feel sexual desire and
you want sexual fulfillment. The platonic notion of love allows
you to feel admiration, but damns you for having a
quotes degrading sexual response. This view makes you feel ashamed
(09:29):
of sexual feelings. This notion of platonic love destroys romantic love.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Download chapter one for free at doctor Kenner dot com
and at Amazon dot com
The Selfish Pats or Romance. Download chapter one for free
at doctor Kenner dot com and at Amazon dot com.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Robert, you're dealing with some medical issues.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
Yes, doctor Kenner. I'm gonna read this off fast. Okay,
I'm scared on the phone. Self diagnosis is a phone
phobia from my work in Vietnam as a radio operator,
where I heard things in combat one month after I
turned nineteen.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Okay, you can slow it down a little.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Married forty one years, no marital issues, Wow, congratulations, thank you.
And my problem is how to deal with medical issues.
My psychology primary diagnosis is combat PTSD total and permanent
(00:49):
Vietnam with the Marines medical. Heading to the computer room
in May, I found myself on my back on the floor,
legs of the top of the two stairs, and egg
size lump on the back of the head. Don't know
if I was out seconds or minutes, No big deal.
Got myself up.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
Wait a minute, did you see a doctor about that?
Because you're saying you lost consciousness right.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Well, I'm coming to that, okay. Got myself up, went
to sit on the couch in the living room. Got
up after half an hour or so to go to
the studio. To do some work, got as far as
the door, so dizzy I knew I had to sit
down on the floor. No warning of the fall, no
memory of it. Let it go for two weeks. Finally
(01:36):
Linda took me to the va er CT scan of
the brain. Full blood work, Everything okay. All blood work
is normal, if not excellent. Lung lung function is normal.
How's this for blood pressure? One O six over sixty five?
But the diagnosis dementia. First question I had was have
(02:01):
anything to do with my past drinking career? No, just
luck of the draw quote.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Wait a minute, Wait a minute, I'm losing you here.
Let me sum up when I'm hearing so far, Robert,
so we make sure I'm on the same page with you.
Is that you know you have some post traumatic stress
disorder from having served in the Marines in sixty eight
and seventy correct, And you know that being on the
phone can be scary for you because that's where you
(02:30):
heard some of the trauma during the war. Right, you
were a phone operator or you worked in that capacity,
so you know that that is a trigger for you.
The second issue that I'm hearing is that more recently,
when was this when Linda took you in. Was that
a few months ago? Okay, so it's more recent that
(02:53):
you had a loss of consciousness and you actually hurt yourself.
I did that once myself. I was getting out of
a chair and the next thing I know, I had
a bruise on my head. I had gone unconscious, and
so I went through the battery of testament through some
monitor that they had on me from my heart, and
I was very lucky. It turned out healthy. It you know,
it just turned out I have very low blood pressure.
(03:13):
In your case, sounds like it turned out that you
got a clean bill of mental I mean of physical health.
But they told you you had dementia based on.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
What hey, I got to interrupt this because we've got
to pay some bills.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
Thirty seconds.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
That's it, A very quick ad and then Ellen will
be back.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
Romance. Oh, I wish guys knew more about what we
want from a relationship. Boy, I wish I knew more
about what I want. Where's that ad? I saw? Ah?
Here it is The Selfish Path to Romance, a serious
romance guidebook. Download chapter one for free at selfish romance
(03:51):
dot com and buy it at Amazon dot com. Hmm,
The selfish path to romance. That is interesting.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Got a clean bill of mental I mean of physical health.
But they told you you had dementia based on what the.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
CT scan showed, global atrophy of the brain.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (04:15):
And she said, in other words, I was born with it,
but nobody, no one in my family had a history
of this.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
Okay. So so you did you get a second opinion
on that? Or is that what you got? Is what
you got?
Speaker 3 (04:29):
That's what I got. Can I can't afford a second
opinion except for the VA that's where all my Okay?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
So given that, what is your main question for me?
Because I know we're down to three minutes.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Oh, let's see. Uh uh, well, just how how do
I deal with the I mean, there's a whole host
of medical issues I didn't I couldn't mention in time.
How do I deal with these miracles? Okay?
Speaker 2 (05:03):
If I got a slew of bad medical diagnoses, including
one that says that I might be declining in my
cognitive function, my thinking function over time, man, I'm going
to want to make the best of my life. I
got within the capacity of what's possible to me. I'm
going to ask myself the question, and you could do
(05:24):
this daily. What would bring me some pleasure today? That's reasonable.
I mean, obviously you don't want to go out gambling
and you know, nonsense stuff, But what would bring you
some pleasure? Do you have a hobby do you enjoy?
Do you do love doing something with Linda? Could you
build up a couples activity that both of you enjoy
that maybe you've never done before. It could be kayaking,
(05:47):
or it could be I don't know, bowling or dancing
or something that might be fun. It would have to
be something you both enjoy. If you have that hobby already,
could you continue with it? How could you make each
day meaningful to you? Given that you're that you're dealing
with some pretty serious issues. Is the quality of life
(06:09):
that matters? If someone told me I had six months
to live, Robert, I don't know what I do, but
I'm really hoping that I would make the best of
those six months and enjoy whatever life I had.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
Understood.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Thank you, So it's number one. I want to also
congratulate well, so focusing you can. Did something come to mind?
Something you enjoy come to mind?
Speaker 3 (06:38):
Well it's nothing, really, I have no hobbies. Well, building websites,
but my work is I'm a professional artist, and that's
what I can't remember how to I can't even remember
how to use my oil paint.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Oh that's very sad. Try to find something that you
can do within your capacity, because if you try to
do the thing that you've already your mind is not
letting you do anymore, You'll just feel inadequate over and
over and over again. So if you can find something
you can do, you can talk very freely to me.
(07:22):
I'm impressed with the way you're conversing with me, especially
since you have phone phobia. This is phenomenal, This is amazing.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Oh, thank you.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Yes, but look at your strengths. Ask Linda what your
strengths are. Ask yourself, what is still within my capacity
to do? If I couldn't do much, I might watch
them old I love Lucy's and Singing in the Rain,
some happy movies, not traumatizing movies, but things that you
and Linda could both enjoy together. Archie Boker, Archie, Man,
(07:56):
if that works for you, use it. You want to
who My husband's standing up dancing here, so he would
do dancing. I think even if he couldn't remember the steps,
we would still be dancing. So it's realizing that you
do have limitations and living within your limitations to the
fullest that is possible to you. And we're working with
(08:20):
Linda on that and making your life joyous. So listen.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Instead of wrapping your mind around what you can't cannot do,
wrap your mind around what you can do.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
For more Doctor Kenner podcast, go to dr Kenner dot
com and please listen to this. Here's an excerpt from
The Selfish pats or Romance by doctors Kenner and Locke.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
One pitfaill to nurturing your sensual attraction to your partner
is the view that ideal romantic love is separated from
the physical, the idea that true love is unsullied. In
quotes by sex, this era usually goes by the name
platonic love. In this view, the body is low and corrupt.
Thus the highest form of romantic love is purely spiritual,
(09:06):
something floating and ethereal. Platonic love, however, is not romantic love.
In a truly romantic relationship, you feel sexual desire and
you want sexual fulfillment. The platonic notion of love allows
you to feel admiration, but damns you for having a
quotes degrading sexual response. This view makes you feel ashamed
(09:29):
of sexual feelings. This notion of platonic love destroys romantic love.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Download chapter one for free at doctor Kenner dot com
and at Amazon dot com
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