December 4, 2025 • 38 mins
Thursday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, Jeff Pillars ticks off the Top 10 things that tick him off.. - We’ll play the song that first introduced us to Robert Earl Keen in the late ’90’s - “Merry Christmas from the Family”.. - We’ve got a brand new round-up of stupid criminals in our annual Holiday Edition of Dumb Crook News.. - One of Santa’s Elves hits Open Mic Night at Shivers Comedy Club.. - We’ll revisit one of our favorite visits with the late, great James Gregory - talking about his many Doctors.. - and Johnny No Cash takes us out with “Folsum Christmas Blues”…
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This makes show on the radio.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
John Bop Ben and Tyler Fellers ran to Jackie and
you listening.
Speaker 3 (00:06):
Hi, pal, you are listening to two of the funniest
guys on the radio and my fraternity brothers at the
Raccoon Lodge, John Boy and Philly on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Are they funny? Are they funny? Oh? Hello, got the.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
News up and out on It is Thursday morning, December fourth,
twenty twenty five.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
They're gonna say one national day.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Oh hey, everybody, come on, ye oh yeah, shit, be careful.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
The national days.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
National Santa's List Day, supposed to make Santa's.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
You're not on the on the nice list.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
As you wait, you.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Still can threaten the kids for a couple more weeks.
Is National sock Day. We'll pick one out and hang
by the fireplace with that list in good idea. National
Cookie Day. I don't know why December four this cookie day.
Speaker 5 (01:43):
But swapping going on a lot of swapping there, holdy cookies.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
That's National Dice Day. Yes, those kind of dice. Thatt's
the ancient gaming tools known as dice.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
All right, grass, that's why they call them bone that's it.
I think. All right, let's get that first prize back out.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
We got three imported dates in history where we're got
to categories. Hey, we'll wake big Shoe's on a radio.
Good morning, Big shows on the radio. All right, hunters,
we got a Happy Heard prize bag for you to win.
Of course, Happy Herd makes top quality of tractors, minerals
and feed for deer, bear and hoggs. If you're not
using a Happy Herd, better hope your neighbors are. Click
(02:25):
on that banner at the Big Show dot com. If
you enter coache JBB you'll get Timberson off checkout.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Listen up right here, win you some December fourth, there
was eighteen twelve.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
The Power More was patented by Peter Galliard of Lancaster, Pennsylvania.
Eighteen twelve.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
What was the more powered by motor gasoline engine? Yea,
all right, go to go with Peter.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Nineteen thirty two. The Jurgens Journal aka The Walter Winchell
Show and later Kaisher Fraser News was first heard on
NBC Blue Network. Wench youll kept that gossip show going
on the radio for twenty three years. It was sponsored
by a first by Jurgen's Lotion and later by dry Ad.
(03:11):
The Odorant, Kaiser, Fraser Cars and Richard Hudnut shampoo.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
The sound made up about Hey.
Speaker 5 (03:21):
We're the Gossip Show. All right, we're gonna spell some tea. Here,
you're gonna spell some tea.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Yeah, we got happy heard blue Emu Birtiue tiny peanuts.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Our sponsor was a lot better. He only lasted twenty
three years.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
Who well, I'll see well, let's finish up on this date.
In nineteen sixty five, Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones
was knocked unconscious when his guitar touched an ungrounded microphone
during a concert in Sacramento, California. He got back up
and finished the show.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
I've been knocked out by electricity, and that's like the
worst way to wake up. Everything hurts. Well.
Speaker 5 (03:57):
He was already medicated, so.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
They didn't notice to elect two songs in.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
There you go.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
There's a category is one eight hundred big shows you
told Free Line across America will play out birds next,
(04:35):
Good morning big shows on the radio, reminding you every
Olympic dream starts with a first glide through Learn to
Skate USA kids build common and strength and joy on
the ice.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Learn to Skate.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
USA offers programs where skaters of all ages and abilities.
To find a program near you, go to learn to
skate USA dot com. And right now, Uppers, let's play Uppers.
Speaker 4 (05:04):
It's the game that anyone can win. John Boy, Bully,
give your prizes from the big prize being. Let's go
contested number one. This should be a lot of fun.
Win you're playing upburst. Have a hurry up and guest
time you love the best time you love.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
A big shots.
Speaker 6 (05:29):
Let's say I heard Allan from Mount Karma.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Hell, I'll say we have a shots.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Good morning Alan, Hello, bit show.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Hey body, good morning. Now Allan, let's say we can
get you through these three categories.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
You get that winning beginning. You ready to go? Yes, sir,
all right?
Speaker 2 (05:56):
In five seconds, give us three landscaping power tools ready go.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
All right, weed eater, leaf blower and a riding by am.
All right.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Now we need three things that are sponsored.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Ready go.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Uh let's see e race cars, radio.
Speaker 7 (06:20):
Shows and movies.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
And for the win, three things that need electrical grounding
shine my mouth, electrical grounding, Ready to.
Speaker 8 (06:35):
Go, microphone, uh, radio, antenna, bathroom outward.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
All ride last queens allree man, and you got a
big prize back head over to Mount Karma is. Congratulations, buddy,
thank you, John Boy, you got it all right. We're
jumping out, catching you up on your news. Right on
the other side of the time capsule.
Speaker 6 (07:07):
He goes hear in the Morning Live because Hey, what's
up in JDS Christomas story.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 9 (07:55):
Jack Fine, I'm happy to help you.
Speaker 10 (07:56):
Yeah, I'm over here. I'm over here at Burger King
right here in Sanclementy. No, not Saqua, Maine. I'm sorry.
I live in Santominy. I'm in Magunna, Gael. I think
that's where I'm at. I'm at a dry though right now.
Had I ordered my food three times. They're mopping the
floor inside, and I understand they're busy. They're not even busy. Okay,
I've been the only call here. I asked the four
different times to make me a Western spotty two burger. Okay,
(08:19):
they keep giving me a hamburger with lettuce, tomato and cheese.
Any is, And I said, I'm not leaving. I want
a Western burger because I just got my kids from taekwondo.
They're hungry. I'm on my way home. And I live
in sanqominy U. Huh okay, she said she gave me
another hamburger. It's wrong, I said four times, I said
I want it. She goes, can you go out and
park in front? And I said no, I want my
hamburger right. So then the lady came to the manager
(08:41):
whatever whoever she is. She came up and she said,
she said, do you want your money back? And I
said no, I want my hamburger. My kids are hungry
and I have to jump on the cold freeway. I said,
I am not leaving the spot. And I said I
will call the police because I want my Western burger
done right now? Is that so hard? Okay?
Speaker 9 (08:57):
What are that meads that you want us to do
for you?
Speaker 10 (08:59):
I said, down here, I want I want them to make. Ma'am.
Speaker 9 (09:02):
We're not gonna go down there and force your Western
making cheeseburger.
Speaker 10 (09:07):
What am I supposed to do?
Speaker 9 (09:09):
This is this is between you and the manager.
Speaker 4 (09:10):
This.
Speaker 9 (09:11):
We're not going to go and force how to make
a hamburger.
Speaker 10 (09:13):
That's glad.
Speaker 9 (09:13):
That's not a criminal issue. There's there's there's nothing criminals there.
Speaker 10 (09:17):
I'm here, so I just sit here.
Speaker 9 (09:19):
You need to calmly and rationally speak to the manager
and figure out what to do between.
Speaker 10 (09:24):
You did come up and I said, can I please
have my Western burger? He said, I'm not dealing it.
She walked away because because they're lopping the floor and
it's awful. It said that they don't want to rest,
they don't want to go through there. And and ma'am.
Speaker 9 (09:36):
Then I suget you get your money back and go
somewhere else. This this is this is not a criminal issue.
We can't go out there and and make them make
you a cheeseburger the way you want it.
Speaker 10 (09:46):
Well, that is that you're supposed to be here to
protect me.
Speaker 11 (09:50):
What are we.
Speaker 9 (09:51):
Protecting you from a wrong teesburger? No, it's just like
it's just a harmful tsburger or something. I don't understand
what you want us to do.
Speaker 10 (09:59):
Well, just come down here. I'm not mean no, ma'am.
Speaker 9 (10:01):
I'm not getting the deputy down there over cheesburger. You
need to go in there and act like an adult
and either get your money back and go home.
Speaker 10 (10:08):
It's not acting like an adult herself. I'm sitting here.
Speaker 12 (10:12):
In my car.
Speaker 10 (10:12):
I just want them to make my kids just to.
Speaker 9 (10:17):
Get your money back from the manager and you go
on your way home.
Speaker 10 (10:20):
Okay, okay, oh bye, myn ay boys.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
It could be worse.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
That could be yeah, hun boy and Billy.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I don't know what they call this stuff, Hamburger, helper.
It's just fine byself.
Speaker 7 (10:41):
Huh.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Good morning radio, dumb right.
Speaker 13 (10:55):
Good show, This is.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
There's a big showing the radio. All right, Thomas, some
Christmas ball JD Daddy.
Speaker 11 (11:17):
I can't sleep. Would you tell me a Christmas story?
And get on up here, your little nosepicker. Let me
see hi Christmas story. Let me say, how do I
tell you one that was true? Let's see it? Twas
the night before Christmas, and all through the trailer I
heard not a sound set for Papa's hay bailer. He
used to work like you know. Our stockings were thrown
over the back of the couch, and the last two
(11:38):
of the day I'd put in my mouth. The younguns
was asleep, and I'd made sure they stayed because I
put some Jack Daniels in their purple kool aid. Me
and old lady was watching a skin flick about a
bunch of young college girls in one Happy Saint. Nick
went out in New York. I heard such a racket.
The dogs started hollering, so I grabbed my hatchet. It's
a cup, said you, mommy, sounds like a sweat team.
I thought, damn it. Tommy swore them girls was eighteen.
(11:59):
So I looked out the window and I seen around
the corner. Is that fat, dirty yankee Feller and a
bunch of twelve pointers. He's trying to break in and says, you, mommy,
with rage, go get you pucking balls and load the
twelve gage. I grabbed a shotgun down off of the racket.
Fat beardy Feller must have went around back. I tore
out the door and went around the house. I slipped
behind the snowboard, just as quiet as a mouse, and
right there he stood with his slaying his deer. I
(12:19):
could smell venison cooking because I hadn't killed one this year. Freeze, yankee,
dirt bag. Don't move, you old coot. He threw up
his hands and said, Lord he Mercy, don't shoot. And
I said, what in the hell are you trying to prove?
He said, I'm Sandy Claus. Can't you see my red suit?
I said, looks like some prison outfit. Then I pulled
back a hammer, and I think you about Pooti's breeches.
I bring toys to youngns every Christmas. Eve, I yelled,
is that the story you.
Speaker 9 (12:40):
Want me to believe?
Speaker 11 (12:40):
Because he really couldn't do it because all the time,
zones and stuff, you know, it just don't cipher out right.
So he umping his bag and he showed me the toys,
pocket knives and red shot off for Southern boys. And
I got altary eyed, what with Christmas and the snow.
So he negotiated a little bit and I let him go.
As he started to leave, I said, now, don't you
be lippy and by the way, shaved ugly chin rub,
you ain't no biker in your hippie. And as he
flew out side, I couldn't resist. I popped off a
(13:01):
shot and I believe I just missed. But remember I
told you we haggled a bill. Let's just say Venison
makes a good Christmas moll Ain't you going to golong
to bed now? I said, I'm smumping with a window shut,
and stay out any.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
More than everybody. The big show is on the radio.
Still a lot more coming at you. He ain't listen.
Speaker 11 (13:28):
My name is man folly.
Speaker 3 (13:31):
I ain't a motivational thinker.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Am thirty five years old. I am right divorced.
Speaker 7 (13:40):
And every morning I listen to Your Boy and Philly
on the Big Show when I wake up in a
van the river, go on and laugh and leave three
radio work.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
Good Morning.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
That's a big show on the radio. All right, Then
you can.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Win John Boyd's wonderful Thing number one hundred and sixty four.
Got that brand new Camo trim waffle house ball cap.
Check it out at the Big Show dot com. Get
your name in the hab We'll do it tomorrow beginning
to find hour of that Friday Show, Big Show, Roll
on Good Morning, Got the Big Show on the radio
coming up? We played John Boyd Jeopardy for an assortment
(14:54):
of small batch, handcooked peanuts from bird Tee County Peanuts,
a Southern tradition for over one hundred years. It's no
Richard Hudnut shampoo.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
But taking the nuts go nuts.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
This Christmas, they got a huge selection to choose from.
Sure to have something for everybody on your gift list.
Interer code JBB and check out get twenty five percent
off plus free shipping when you shop online. Burnteen County
Peanuts dot net. I look for the link at the
Big Show dot com. Hang on and play for it
in minutes. First, get pailers in here with a bonus
(15:27):
top ten this morning.
Speaker 13 (15:29):
Oh last month I did a top ten about all
the stuff I hate about getting old?
Speaker 5 (15:35):
What is this?
Speaker 4 (15:37):
Well?
Speaker 13 (15:37):
I turned sixty five on Thursday, So guess what we're
doing it again? Here's part two. Look, it is what
it is. Let's just get it over with number ten.
I'm not keeping you up, am I?
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Idiot?
Speaker 13 (15:52):
You had one shop to push up, put down your
field and stream magazine and pay attention.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
Is that number ten?
Speaker 5 (15:58):
No, that's number eleven. Now was number ten?
Speaker 2 (16:04):
Number ten?
Speaker 13 (16:04):
Dreading and embarrassing death. Look, I just know I'm not
gonna be lucky enough to go in my sleep. I
mean that's a dream, right, Not me. I'll kick off
in a port of crapper, eating a big mechanize to
lift me out with a crane, to find me in
a pasture full of sheet naked from the waist down,
wearing a Star Trek T shirt and swim flippers.
Speaker 5 (16:21):
Oh dead in a theater showing an Amy Schumer film.
Speaker 13 (16:24):
I'm just glad I won't live to see it. Number nine,
Why is everything so far away?
Speaker 5 (16:30):
Am I right?
Speaker 13 (16:31):
Doesn't matter what it is, it's way the hell over there.
Your life saving medication is in there, drawing in the
next room, by the hell with it? Number eight my
favorite muttering. I catch myself doing it all the time,
walking around, talking to myself, even in public. Where the
hell is the almond butter in this dump? And there's
(16:53):
no customer service anymore? I wonder what she charged to
give us a peak. I got slept for that one.
By the way, I just can't stop stupid old man.
Number seven.
Speaker 5 (17:05):
Can you smell that? Because I can't.
Speaker 13 (17:07):
I can see fine, My hearing is sound, but my
nose is working at about twenty percent capacity. And that's
fine when I'm passing a chicken farm or a waste
treatment plant. But I missed the smell of coffee and popcorn.
And okay, I'll say it my own, boots. I love
chemical smells too. During the pandemic, Grandma Randy over here'd
run around the studio spraying it with rubbing alcohol. Oh oh,
(17:28):
the germs skew the germs. I didn't want to tell
him he was an idiot, because I.
Speaker 5 (17:32):
Needed to fix.
Speaker 13 (17:34):
What a sad, stupid life.
Speaker 5 (17:37):
Number six, I've become the old storyteller. I caught myself
the other day.
Speaker 13 (17:42):
A couple was talking at the story and here comes
on gole numb nuts sticking his toast, sent chin with
some anecdote.
Speaker 5 (17:47):
You know when I was making movies in South Africa.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Shut up?
Speaker 13 (17:52):
Note to self, No one cares a dumb ass. Number five.
I wish a Karen would. All you see on the
internet is videos of Karen's miserable heifer's.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
So where are they?
Speaker 13 (18:05):
I'm old, I'm in a foul mood, and when I
leave the house, I'm waiting for a Karen to start.
Something's a weekend, finish it. I had a lot of
encounters during COVID. Where's your mask on your mom's nightstand?
Where's your mask? Up your ass? And to the left,
where's your mask? Get lost? Okay, they can all be
for the time capsule. But you know what I'm saying,
I'm primed and ready, not a Karen in sight. You
(18:25):
cows better step up your game. Dad, he needs a
rubble Number four sounds you know what I'm talking about.
Some people call him Dad's sounds. Try to get out
of my recliner and I sound like the skipper from
Gilligan's Island. I've been down to pick something up all
of a sudden, I'm Sergeant Hulka from Stripes. Yeah, I'm
(18:48):
not gonna tell you what happens. When I set up
number three flexibility Twenty years ago, I could do pratfalls, cartwheels.
I could do a handstand, touch my toes. I can
still touch my toes, but it takes me an hour.
My physical range of motion sucks. I slapped a mosquito
on my neck. I went up in a sling number
two my neck. All right, let's take some explanation. I
(19:10):
was looking in the mirror and I started thinking about
shaving off my beard. You know, I've had it for
almost thirty years. Might be a nice change.
Speaker 5 (19:15):
And as I was.
Speaker 13 (19:15):
Feeling my face, I noticed something under my chin. Oh
my god, I had that big flap of skin hanging
down that Leonard Nimoy turkey waddle like a chameleon's du lap,
like a fatty pack strapped around my neck.
Speaker 5 (19:28):
Can I get a break? Can someone give me one
damn break? And finally, the number one thing I hate
about getting older, You had.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
One damn job to eleven Nash, Thank you funerals.
Speaker 13 (19:51):
You're not coming to mine, so I'm not coming to yours.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
All right, Budd, Well, let's play John Boy Jeopardy. Let's
review yesterday's question. We found out transportation historians confirmed the
first railway system actually dates back to ancient Greece during
the sixth century. It was powered by this by what
are people? People pushed a boat over land railway wagons
(20:23):
and all right, today's John Boy Jeopardy. The first coin
operated version of one of these debuted in Terry Hawt,
Indiana in nineteen ten, and was so immediately unpopular it
sparked boycotts, protests, and even vandalism.
Speaker 5 (20:41):
What's the coin operated fart imitator?
Speaker 1 (20:45):
Do you have one of those?
Speaker 11 (20:47):
Ya?
Speaker 1 (20:48):
One? Eight hundred? Big Joe? You told free line. We
played John boyd Jeopardy. Next.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
Good Thursday Morning, Big Show's on the radio. Why feature
track from The Big Show bit Box Johnny and No
Cash sings Fosome Christmas Blues, Hey words Christmas Blues when
they hit the Big Box app the Big Show dot
Com here right now, Let's play.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
Yes live across America.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
It's John Boy jab Don't that?
Speaker 1 (21:38):
And now your hosts with today's thought. Every dead body
on Mount Everest was once a highly motivated individual. Follow
him on Facebook. Little more inspirational thoughts may you.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
Let's say I had a Harold out of Crossville, Tennessee.
Good morning, Harold.
Speaker 14 (22:01):
It wasn't money, tom boy, all.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
Ragging out, Harold, Hey, buddy, welcome, alright, you got first
shot this morning, Harol. Let's see what you got. The
first coin operated version of one of these debut and
Terry Hart, Indiana in nineteen ten. It was so immediately
unpopular it sparked Boycott's protests and even vandalism. What the
(22:25):
world could it be?
Speaker 1 (22:26):
Harold?
Speaker 2 (22:28):
Was it a machine? Well, let's see, show us a
pinball machine? No, you know they still cost money.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
You play well?
Speaker 2 (22:42):
Now we appreciate you playing, buddy, Hope you have a
great day.
Speaker 6 (22:47):
I appreciate you.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
All right, buddy, Let's go to Skyler. He is in Rustburg, Virginia.
Good morning, Skyler.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
Hey, how y'all boys doing.
Speaker 15 (22:56):
It's a first time caller. How y'all doing?
Speaker 1 (23:01):
See how we're doing? Good?
Speaker 2 (23:02):
Welcome? All right, Well we know it's not a pinball machine.
Speaker 1 (23:06):
See this.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
It was a coin operated version of one of these
and people really didn't like it. So what could cause
that much vitriol? I'm saying, Skyler, Thanks, let's see, is
it a toilet? Well, let's see. Is it a toilet
(23:27):
that would do it?
Speaker 4 (23:32):
So?
Speaker 2 (23:33):
And it cost a nickel but that's about a buck
fifty in today's money.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
That's real money. So what what?
Speaker 2 (23:40):
What really ticked people off was the idea of paying
to protect their dignity over a basic human need. So
this is great by the night. By the sixties, protest
groups were pushing Congress to ban paid toilet nationwide. Only
a few states did rest out the I says, late
(24:00):
seventies on a handful still around. But oh wait, don't
flush the idea just yet. Paint toilets are making a
comeback thanks to tap to Paykay, Is that right?
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Yeah? Bout that all right? Good luck out there, Hey Scyler,
work for you, buddy.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
You got the big old Bertee County Peanuts price pack
this Christmas?
Speaker 15 (24:26):
Oh well, I appreciate you. Can I give a shout
out real quick?
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Of course you can.
Speaker 4 (24:30):
Well.
Speaker 15 (24:31):
Look, I've been listening to y'all boys for about twenty
four years, at one years that I was born in
two thousand. I've been listening with my John I want
to give him a shout out. And my brother Garrett,
he's in the Air Force. We've been listening to you
by my whole life. Man, I'm ready to hold me
a dollar, and I'm about glad that I could. Man,
I appreciate y'all.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Y'all, that's awesome.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
Scotlar tell you family, thank you so much, and we
appreciate you.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Buddy. You hang on Jackie's hook you up, all right,
all right?
Speaker 2 (25:00):
I want he.
Speaker 5 (25:04):
Knows what you mean.
Speaker 15 (25:05):
Y'all get from straight up earth Harter.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
Why the many hours hopp of your news?
Speaker 2 (25:16):
About twenty minutes away from dumb crook news Christmas edition?
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Bang don't I'll report good morning, Big Shows on the radio.
Speaker 11 (25:58):
I man.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
Robert Earl Keene gonna join us on the Big Show
tomorrow getting rid of his Christmas tour anyway.
Speaker 11 (26:07):
R E.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
K All started a friendship that was lasted well over
thirty years, maybe about thirty five if would go back
and count them up. All started with this Christmas tune
our favorite boys out of East Texas.
Speaker 14 (26:31):
Mom God drunk and that got drunk at our Christmas party.
We were drinking sham pain, punch and homemade. An little
(26:54):
sister brought a new boy friends. He was some magic can.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
We didn't know what to.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
Think of him.
Speaker 8 (27:08):
Cally sang police Nobby nod for lice, nobby.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
Brother.
Speaker 14 (27:25):
Ken brought his kids with him, the three from his first.
Speaker 8 (27:33):
Wife Lynn.
Speaker 14 (27:35):
And the two iddical twins from his second wife Mary. Now,
of course he brought his new wife. Kay talks all
about the chain smoking while the stereo no gladays gold
(28:03):
no well the first no or the turkey turned the
ball game on. Nick Margarite is winning the Eggnox gone.
(28:28):
Send somebody to the quick pack store. We need some
ice in that extension cord again, A fiend in and
some dim rides a box of tampons and some more
barl lines. HALLAUI everybody say cheese. Merry Christmas from the
(28:57):
man all ran and reeda drove from Harlow. Just I
can't remember how I'm kin to Then when they're trying
(29:22):
to plug.
Speaker 8 (29:23):
Their motor home in Grave blue Ere Christmas.
Speaker 14 (29:28):
Line, cousin DAVIDO, just what went wrong? So we all
waited out on our front law. He threw the breaker
and the lights came on and we.
Speaker 12 (29:47):
Signed side nighte on side.
Speaker 14 (30:04):
Are the turkey turned the ball game, make blood and
marries because we all want send somebody to the stop
and go. We need some celien again, a fig stove,
(30:24):
a bag of lemons, and some pies, spries, a box
of tampons and some say long lines. How ye, everybody
say cheese. Merry Christmas from the maas.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Police moving.
Speaker 6 (31:27):
Good.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Thursday morning, December the fourth, headed toward Christmas time with
a big show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Lesten it.
Speaker 2 (31:38):
It's time for dumb crooked news, dumb crook story sending
by you the big show listeners from all over the world.
The address will follow the special holiday edition. A forty
two year old man was arrested for driving a parade
float while intoxicated during the annual Christmas Parade and Anderson,
(32:00):
South Carolina. According to witnesses, a man appeared to loose
patients with the slow pacing of the parade and began
laying on his horn before starting to pass other floats
and participants in the lineup. Spectators reported that the festively
decorated float was weaving past other parade participants as it
(32:21):
broke free from the procession, with the driver's son and
eighteen other terrified riders still on board. Once clear the
parade route, police ai the driver sped through city streets,
ran red lights, and refused.
Speaker 1 (32:35):
To pull over.
Speaker 2 (32:36):
During a three mile chase with speeds reaching up to
sixty miles an hour. That's fast with a float. Officers
eventually stopped the vehicle and took the man into custody.
He was charged with over three dozen crimes, including dui
eighteen counts of kidnapping, resisting arrests, and as softening an officer.
(32:57):
He was later sent USD to ninety days in jail
and five years probation. They revoked his float request for
the following year. Three members of a shoplifting ring targeted
a Louis Vaton store in Bellevue, Washington, on Black Friday.
The trio included two masked women and one male suspect
(33:20):
wearing a Spandex ski mask, notably without eyeholes. All three
crooks went straight to work, grabbing as many expensive handbags
as they could carry. Within seconds, and two women sprinted
past security and out of the store well. The male
thief was close behind, running full speed toward the exit,
but with one slight miscalculation, he slammed headfirst into the
(33:43):
plate glass window just to the left of the door,
knocked himself out, and that seventeen year old was charged
with attempted robbery. Well, a nineteen year old Stromsburg, Nebraska
woman stole a car over the thanks Giving holiday and
drove it to a nearby town where she robbed a
(34:03):
bank while claiming to have a gun. And she might
have gotten away with it if she hadn't done what
authority say. May many modern criminals can't seem to resist.
She bragged about it on social media.
Speaker 14 (34:15):
Of course.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
It's about I reportedly returned home and, while still wearing
the same clothes from the robbery, recorded herself smoking marijuana,
holding up bundles of cash, and bragging, I just stole
a car and robbed a bank. Now I'm rich. She
titled the seven minute video Chick Bank Robber and posted
(34:39):
it on YouTube, where it instantly it went viral, racking
up millions of views. In it, Sabauta says she's going
to pay off her college loans and go on one
Hella shopping spree. However, her internet fame and her brief
life of crime were both cutting short. Police arrested her
shortly after the video went public. And prosecut computers using
(35:00):
footage as evidence against her. She got eleven to twenty
two years in prison, but she had millions of views.
Forty seven year old suspect drug dealer in Liverpool, England,
decorated his Christmas tree by festooning it with cash and
little bags of cocaine, and then sent pictures of it
(35:24):
to several people on his client list, along with the
caption Who's dreaming of a white Christmas? Well as luck
would have it. Several of them posted the picture to Facebook.
Police trace the image back to the suspect, obtained warrants
for multiple locations, and then the ensuing raid sees nearly
two million dollars in cash and narcotics. The man was
(35:47):
arrested and is now enjoying an extended seven year Holidays
stay with His Majesty's prison service.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
Oh there they go, how.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
Formal and final. In Eureka Springs, Arkansas, fire and police
responded to her residence on Thanksgiving Day after a nine
to one to one caller reported that their grandmother had
accidentally set herself on fire. Well first responders arrived to
a chaotic scene with several family members frantically waving thick
(36:19):
smoke out of the home, so firefighters rushed inside, where
a man holding a fire extinguisher was hysterically screaming, she's
in here, expecting the worst. Crews followed him into the kitchen,
where a topless, seventy seven year old woman was found
setting on the floor completely covered in white powder. Family
(36:41):
members stated that the grandmother had been removing a turkey
from the oven when she somehow managed to set her
shirt sleeve on fire. Another relative saw the flames and yelled, Grandma,
you're on fire. The panic woman then tore off the
burning garment and began jumping and stomping on it. Meanwhile,
the turkey, now fully engulfed in flames, ignited the kitchen curtains,
(37:05):
sending family members running for their lives. Fire officials credit
the woman's thirty four year old grandson with grabbing the
homes fire extinguisher and putting out the blaze, which was
reportedly started by grease from the turkey well. The grandmother
was treated at the scene for minor burns and smoke imlution.
The whole thing was horrifying. The grandson told officers that
(37:28):
image of my topless grandmother.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
Jumping up and down on her flaming blouse.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Will hault me forever.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
In blaze, in slow motion every time I closed my eyes.
Speaker 4 (37:47):
Ah.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
If you have dumb crook news, mail to dumb crook News,
John Bowyn, Billy Peel Box one nine one one one,
Charlotte and Z two way two one nine, or email
to anybody but me at the Big Show dot com
This makes show on the radio.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
John Bop Ben and Tyler Fellers ran to Jackie and
you listening.
Speaker 3 (00:06):
Hi, pal, you are listening to two of the funniest
guys on the radio and my fraternity brothers at the
Raccoon Lodge, John Boy and Philly on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Are they funny? Are they funny? Oh? Hello, got the.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
News up and out on It is Thursday morning, December fourth,
twenty twenty five.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
They're gonna say one national day.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Oh hey, everybody, come on, ye oh yeah, shit, be careful.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
The national days.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
National Santa's List Day, supposed to make Santa's.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
You're not on the on the nice list.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
As you wait, you.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Still can threaten the kids for a couple more weeks.
Is National sock Day. We'll pick one out and hang
by the fireplace with that list in good idea. National
Cookie Day. I don't know why December four this cookie day.
Speaker 5 (01:43):
But swapping going on a lot of swapping there, holdy cookies.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
That's National Dice Day. Yes, those kind of dice. Thatt's
the ancient gaming tools known as dice.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
All right, grass, that's why they call them bone that's it.
I think. All right, let's get that first prize back out.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
We got three imported dates in history where we're got
to categories. Hey, we'll wake big Shoe's on a radio.
Good morning, Big shows on the radio. All right, hunters,
we got a Happy Heard prize bag for you to win.
Of course, Happy Herd makes top quality of tractors, minerals
and feed for deer, bear and hoggs. If you're not
using a Happy Herd, better hope your neighbors are. Click
(02:25):
on that banner at the Big Show dot com. If
you enter coache JBB you'll get Timberson off checkout.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Listen up right here, win you some December fourth, there
was eighteen twelve.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
The Power More was patented by Peter Galliard of Lancaster, Pennsylvania.
Eighteen twelve.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
What was the more powered by motor gasoline engine? Yea,
all right, go to go with Peter.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Nineteen thirty two. The Jurgens Journal aka The Walter Winchell
Show and later Kaisher Fraser News was first heard on
NBC Blue Network. Wench youll kept that gossip show going
on the radio for twenty three years. It was sponsored
by a first by Jurgen's Lotion and later by dry Ad.
(03:11):
The Odorant, Kaiser, Fraser Cars and Richard Hudnut shampoo.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
The sound made up about Hey.
Speaker 5 (03:21):
We're the Gossip Show. All right, we're gonna spell some tea. Here,
you're gonna spell some tea.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Yeah, we got happy heard blue Emu Birtiue tiny peanuts.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Our sponsor was a lot better. He only lasted twenty
three years.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
Who well, I'll see well, let's finish up on this date.
In nineteen sixty five, Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones
was knocked unconscious when his guitar touched an ungrounded microphone
during a concert in Sacramento, California. He got back up
and finished the show.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
I've been knocked out by electricity, and that's like the
worst way to wake up. Everything hurts. Well.
Speaker 5 (03:57):
He was already medicated, so.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
They didn't notice to elect two songs in.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
There you go.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
There's a category is one eight hundred big shows you
told Free Line across America will play out birds next,
(04:35):
Good morning big shows on the radio, reminding you every
Olympic dream starts with a first glide through Learn to
Skate USA kids build common and strength and joy on
the ice.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Learn to Skate.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
USA offers programs where skaters of all ages and abilities.
To find a program near you, go to learn to
skate USA dot com. And right now, Uppers, let's play Uppers.
Speaker 4 (05:04):
It's the game that anyone can win. John Boy, Bully,
give your prizes from the big prize being. Let's go
contested number one. This should be a lot of fun.
Win you're playing upburst. Have a hurry up and guest
time you love the best time you love.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
A big shots.
Speaker 6 (05:29):
Let's say I heard Allan from Mount Karma.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Hell, I'll say we have a shots.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Good morning Alan, Hello, bit show.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Hey body, good morning. Now Allan, let's say we can
get you through these three categories.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
You get that winning beginning. You ready to go? Yes, sir,
all right?
Speaker 2 (05:56):
In five seconds, give us three landscaping power tools ready go.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
All right, weed eater, leaf blower and a riding by am.
All right.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Now we need three things that are sponsored.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Ready go.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
Uh let's see e race cars, radio.
Speaker 7 (06:20):
Shows and movies.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
And for the win, three things that need electrical grounding
shine my mouth, electrical grounding, Ready to.
Speaker 8 (06:35):
Go, microphone, uh, radio, antenna, bathroom outward.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
All ride last queens allree man, and you got a
big prize back head over to Mount Karma is. Congratulations, buddy,
thank you, John Boy, you got it all right. We're
jumping out, catching you up on your news. Right on
the other side of the time capsule.
Speaker 6 (07:07):
He goes hear in the Morning Live because Hey, what's
up in JDS Christomas story.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 9 (07:55):
Jack Fine, I'm happy to help you.
Speaker 10 (07:56):
Yeah, I'm over here. I'm over here at Burger King
right here in Sanclementy. No, not Saqua, Maine. I'm sorry.
I live in Santominy. I'm in Magunna, Gael. I think
that's where I'm at. I'm at a dry though right now.
Had I ordered my food three times. They're mopping the
floor inside, and I understand they're busy. They're not even busy. Okay,
I've been the only call here. I asked the four
different times to make me a Western spotty two burger. Okay,
(08:19):
they keep giving me a hamburger with lettuce, tomato and cheese.
Any is, And I said, I'm not leaving. I want
a Western burger because I just got my kids from taekwondo.
They're hungry. I'm on my way home. And I live
in sanqominy U. Huh okay, she said she gave me
another hamburger. It's wrong, I said four times, I said
I want it. She goes, can you go out and
park in front? And I said no, I want my
hamburger right. So then the lady came to the manager
(08:41):
whatever whoever she is. She came up and she said,
she said, do you want your money back? And I
said no, I want my hamburger. My kids are hungry
and I have to jump on the cold freeway. I said,
I am not leaving the spot. And I said I
will call the police because I want my Western burger
done right now? Is that so hard? Okay?
Speaker 9 (08:57):
What are that meads that you want us to do
for you?
Speaker 10 (08:59):
I said, down here, I want I want them to make. Ma'am.
Speaker 9 (09:02):
We're not gonna go down there and force your Western
making cheeseburger.
Speaker 10 (09:07):
What am I supposed to do?
Speaker 9 (09:09):
This is this is between you and the manager.
Speaker 4 (09:10):
This.
Speaker 9 (09:11):
We're not going to go and force how to make
a hamburger.
Speaker 10 (09:13):
That's glad.
Speaker 9 (09:13):
That's not a criminal issue. There's there's there's nothing criminals there.
Speaker 10 (09:17):
I'm here, so I just sit here.
Speaker 9 (09:19):
You need to calmly and rationally speak to the manager
and figure out what to do between.
Speaker 10 (09:24):
You did come up and I said, can I please
have my Western burger? He said, I'm not dealing it.
She walked away because because they're lopping the floor and
it's awful. It said that they don't want to rest,
they don't want to go through there. And and ma'am.
Speaker 9 (09:36):
Then I suget you get your money back and go
somewhere else. This this is this is not a criminal issue.
We can't go out there and and make them make
you a cheeseburger the way you want it.
Speaker 10 (09:46):
Well, that is that you're supposed to be here to
protect me.
Speaker 11 (09:50):
What are we.
Speaker 9 (09:51):
Protecting you from a wrong teesburger? No, it's just like
it's just a harmful tsburger or something. I don't understand
what you want us to do.
Speaker 10 (09:59):
Well, just come down here. I'm not mean no, ma'am.
Speaker 9 (10:01):
I'm not getting the deputy down there over cheesburger. You
need to go in there and act like an adult
and either get your money back and go home.
Speaker 10 (10:08):
It's not acting like an adult herself. I'm sitting here.
Speaker 12 (10:12):
In my car.
Speaker 10 (10:12):
I just want them to make my kids just to.
Speaker 9 (10:17):
Get your money back from the manager and you go
on your way home.
Speaker 10 (10:20):
Okay, okay, oh bye, myn ay boys.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
It could be worse.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
That could be yeah, hun boy and Billy.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I don't know what they call this stuff, Hamburger, helper.
It's just fine byself.
Speaker 7 (10:41):
Huh.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Good morning radio, dumb right.
Speaker 13 (10:55):
Good show, This is.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
There's a big showing the radio. All right, Thomas, some
Christmas ball JD Daddy.
Speaker 11 (11:17):
I can't sleep. Would you tell me a Christmas story?
And get on up here, your little nosepicker. Let me
see hi Christmas story. Let me say, how do I
tell you one that was true? Let's see it? Twas
the night before Christmas, and all through the trailer I
heard not a sound set for Papa's hay bailer. He
used to work like you know. Our stockings were thrown
over the back of the couch, and the last two
(11:38):
of the day I'd put in my mouth. The younguns
was asleep, and I'd made sure they stayed because I
put some Jack Daniels in their purple kool aid. Me
and old lady was watching a skin flick about a
bunch of young college girls in one Happy Saint. Nick
went out in New York. I heard such a racket.
The dogs started hollering, so I grabbed my hatchet. It's
a cup, said you, mommy, sounds like a sweat team.
I thought, damn it. Tommy swore them girls was eighteen.
(11:59):
So I looked out the window and I seen around
the corner. Is that fat, dirty yankee Feller and a
bunch of twelve pointers. He's trying to break in and says, you, mommy,
with rage, go get you pucking balls and load the
twelve gage. I grabbed a shotgun down off of the racket.
Fat beardy Feller must have went around back. I tore
out the door and went around the house. I slipped
behind the snowboard, just as quiet as a mouse, and
right there he stood with his slaying his deer. I
(12:19):
could smell venison cooking because I hadn't killed one this year. Freeze, yankee,
dirt bag. Don't move, you old coot. He threw up
his hands and said, Lord he Mercy, don't shoot. And
I said, what in the hell are you trying to prove?
He said, I'm Sandy Claus. Can't you see my red suit?
I said, looks like some prison outfit. Then I pulled
back a hammer, and I think you about Pooti's breeches.
I bring toys to youngns every Christmas. Eve, I yelled,
is that the story you.
Speaker 9 (12:40):
Want me to believe?
Speaker 11 (12:40):
Because he really couldn't do it because all the time,
zones and stuff, you know, it just don't cipher out right.
So he umping his bag and he showed me the toys,
pocket knives and red shot off for Southern boys. And
I got altary eyed, what with Christmas and the snow.
So he negotiated a little bit and I let him go.
As he started to leave, I said, now, don't you
be lippy and by the way, shaved ugly chin rub,
you ain't no biker in your hippie. And as he
flew out side, I couldn't resist. I popped off a
(13:01):
shot and I believe I just missed. But remember I
told you we haggled a bill. Let's just say Venison
makes a good Christmas moll Ain't you going to golong
to bed now? I said, I'm smumping with a window shut,
and stay out any.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
More than everybody. The big show is on the radio.
Still a lot more coming at you. He ain't listen.
Speaker 11 (13:28):
My name is man folly.
Speaker 3 (13:31):
I ain't a motivational thinker.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Am thirty five years old. I am right divorced.
Speaker 7 (13:40):
And every morning I listen to Your Boy and Philly
on the Big Show when I wake up in a
van the river, go on and laugh and leave three
radio work.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
Good Morning.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
That's a big show on the radio. All right, Then
you can.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Win John Boyd's wonderful Thing number one hundred and sixty four.
Got that brand new Camo trim waffle house ball cap.
Check it out at the Big Show dot com. Get
your name in the hab We'll do it tomorrow beginning
to find hour of that Friday Show, Big Show, Roll
on Good Morning, Got the Big Show on the radio
coming up? We played John Boyd Jeopardy for an assortment
(14:54):
of small batch, handcooked peanuts from bird Tee County Peanuts,
a Southern tradition for over one hundred years. It's no
Richard Hudnut shampoo.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
But taking the nuts go nuts.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
This Christmas, they got a huge selection to choose from.
Sure to have something for everybody on your gift list.
Interer code JBB and check out get twenty five percent
off plus free shipping when you shop online. Burnteen County
Peanuts dot net. I look for the link at the
Big Show dot com. Hang on and play for it
in minutes. First, get pailers in here with a bonus
(15:27):
top ten this morning.
Speaker 13 (15:29):
Oh last month I did a top ten about all
the stuff I hate about getting old?
Speaker 5 (15:35):
What is this?
Speaker 4 (15:37):
Well?
Speaker 13 (15:37):
I turned sixty five on Thursday, So guess what we're
doing it again? Here's part two. Look, it is what
it is. Let's just get it over with number ten.
I'm not keeping you up, am I?
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Idiot?
Speaker 13 (15:52):
You had one shop to push up, put down your
field and stream magazine and pay attention.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
Is that number ten?
Speaker 5 (15:58):
No, that's number eleven. Now was number ten?
Speaker 2 (16:04):
Number ten?
Speaker 13 (16:04):
Dreading and embarrassing death. Look, I just know I'm not
gonna be lucky enough to go in my sleep. I
mean that's a dream, right, Not me. I'll kick off
in a port of crapper, eating a big mechanize to
lift me out with a crane, to find me in
a pasture full of sheet naked from the waist down,
wearing a Star Trek T shirt and swim flippers.
Speaker 5 (16:21):
Oh dead in a theater showing an Amy Schumer film.
Speaker 13 (16:24):
I'm just glad I won't live to see it. Number nine,
Why is everything so far away?
Speaker 5 (16:30):
Am I right?
Speaker 13 (16:31):
Doesn't matter what it is, it's way the hell over there.
Your life saving medication is in there, drawing in the
next room, by the hell with it? Number eight my
favorite muttering. I catch myself doing it all the time,
walking around, talking to myself, even in public. Where the
hell is the almond butter in this dump? And there's
(16:53):
no customer service anymore? I wonder what she charged to
give us a peak. I got slept for that one.
By the way, I just can't stop stupid old man.
Number seven.
Speaker 5 (17:05):
Can you smell that? Because I can't.
Speaker 13 (17:07):
I can see fine, My hearing is sound, but my
nose is working at about twenty percent capacity. And that's
fine when I'm passing a chicken farm or a waste
treatment plant. But I missed the smell of coffee and popcorn.
And okay, I'll say it my own, boots. I love
chemical smells too. During the pandemic, Grandma Randy over here'd
run around the studio spraying it with rubbing alcohol. Oh oh,
(17:28):
the germs skew the germs. I didn't want to tell
him he was an idiot, because I.
Speaker 5 (17:32):
Needed to fix.
Speaker 13 (17:34):
What a sad, stupid life.
Speaker 5 (17:37):
Number six, I've become the old storyteller. I caught myself
the other day.
Speaker 13 (17:42):
A couple was talking at the story and here comes
on gole numb nuts sticking his toast, sent chin with
some anecdote.
Speaker 5 (17:47):
You know when I was making movies in South Africa.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Shut up?
Speaker 13 (17:52):
Note to self, No one cares a dumb ass. Number five.
I wish a Karen would. All you see on the
internet is videos of Karen's miserable heifer's.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
So where are they?
Speaker 13 (18:05):
I'm old, I'm in a foul mood, and when I
leave the house, I'm waiting for a Karen to start.
Something's a weekend, finish it. I had a lot of
encounters during COVID. Where's your mask on your mom's nightstand?
Where's your mask? Up your ass? And to the left,
where's your mask? Get lost? Okay, they can all be
for the time capsule. But you know what I'm saying,
I'm primed and ready, not a Karen in sight. You
(18:25):
cows better step up your game. Dad, he needs a
rubble Number four sounds you know what I'm talking about.
Some people call him Dad's sounds. Try to get out
of my recliner and I sound like the skipper from
Gilligan's Island. I've been down to pick something up all
of a sudden, I'm Sergeant Hulka from Stripes. Yeah, I'm
(18:48):
not gonna tell you what happens. When I set up
number three flexibility Twenty years ago, I could do pratfalls, cartwheels.
I could do a handstand, touch my toes. I can
still touch my toes, but it takes me an hour.
My physical range of motion sucks. I slapped a mosquito
on my neck. I went up in a sling number
two my neck. All right, let's take some explanation. I
(19:10):
was looking in the mirror and I started thinking about
shaving off my beard. You know, I've had it for
almost thirty years. Might be a nice change.
Speaker 5 (19:15):
And as I was.
Speaker 13 (19:15):
Feeling my face, I noticed something under my chin. Oh
my god, I had that big flap of skin hanging
down that Leonard Nimoy turkey waddle like a chameleon's du lap,
like a fatty pack strapped around my neck.
Speaker 5 (19:28):
Can I get a break? Can someone give me one
damn break? And finally, the number one thing I hate
about getting older, You had.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
One damn job to eleven Nash, Thank you funerals.
Speaker 13 (19:51):
You're not coming to mine, so I'm not coming to yours.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
All right, Budd, Well, let's play John Boy Jeopardy. Let's
review yesterday's question. We found out transportation historians confirmed the
first railway system actually dates back to ancient Greece during
the sixth century. It was powered by this by what
are people? People pushed a boat over land railway wagons
(20:23):
and all right, today's John Boy Jeopardy. The first coin
operated version of one of these debuted in Terry Hawt,
Indiana in nineteen ten, and was so immediately unpopular it
sparked boycotts, protests, and even vandalism.
Speaker 5 (20:41):
What's the coin operated fart imitator?
Speaker 1 (20:45):
Do you have one of those?
Speaker 11 (20:47):
Ya?
Speaker 1 (20:48):
One? Eight hundred? Big Joe? You told free line. We
played John boyd Jeopardy. Next.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
Good Thursday Morning, Big Show's on the radio. Why feature
track from The Big Show bit Box Johnny and No
Cash sings Fosome Christmas Blues, Hey words Christmas Blues when
they hit the Big Box app the Big Show dot
Com here right now, Let's play.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
Yes live across America.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
It's John Boy jab Don't that?
Speaker 1 (21:38):
And now your hosts with today's thought. Every dead body
on Mount Everest was once a highly motivated individual. Follow
him on Facebook. Little more inspirational thoughts may you.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
Let's say I had a Harold out of Crossville, Tennessee.
Good morning, Harold.
Speaker 14 (22:01):
It wasn't money, tom boy, all.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
Ragging out, Harold, Hey, buddy, welcome, alright, you got first
shot this morning, Harol. Let's see what you got. The
first coin operated version of one of these debut and
Terry Hart, Indiana in nineteen ten. It was so immediately
unpopular it sparked Boycott's protests and even vandalism. What the
(22:25):
world could it be?
Speaker 1 (22:26):
Harold?
Speaker 2 (22:28):
Was it a machine? Well, let's see, show us a
pinball machine? No, you know they still cost money.
Speaker 1 (22:39):
You play well?
Speaker 2 (22:42):
Now we appreciate you playing, buddy, Hope you have a
great day.
Speaker 6 (22:47):
I appreciate you.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
All right, buddy, Let's go to Skyler. He is in Rustburg, Virginia.
Good morning, Skyler.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
Hey, how y'all boys doing.
Speaker 15 (22:56):
It's a first time caller. How y'all doing?
Speaker 1 (23:01):
See how we're doing? Good?
Speaker 2 (23:02):
Welcome? All right, Well we know it's not a pinball machine.
Speaker 1 (23:06):
See this.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
It was a coin operated version of one of these
and people really didn't like it. So what could cause
that much vitriol? I'm saying, Skyler, Thanks, let's see, is
it a toilet? Well, let's see. Is it a toilet
(23:27):
that would do it?
Speaker 4 (23:32):
So?
Speaker 2 (23:33):
And it cost a nickel but that's about a buck
fifty in today's money.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
That's real money. So what what?
Speaker 2 (23:40):
What really ticked people off was the idea of paying
to protect their dignity over a basic human need. So
this is great by the night. By the sixties, protest
groups were pushing Congress to ban paid toilet nationwide. Only
a few states did rest out the I says, late
(24:00):
seventies on a handful still around. But oh wait, don't
flush the idea just yet. Paint toilets are making a
comeback thanks to tap to Paykay, Is that right?
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Yeah? Bout that all right? Good luck out there, Hey Scyler,
work for you, buddy.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
You got the big old Bertee County Peanuts price pack
this Christmas?
Speaker 15 (24:26):
Oh well, I appreciate you. Can I give a shout
out real quick?
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Of course you can.
Speaker 4 (24:30):
Well.
Speaker 15 (24:31):
Look, I've been listening to y'all boys for about twenty
four years, at one years that I was born in
two thousand. I've been listening with my John I want
to give him a shout out. And my brother Garrett,
he's in the Air Force. We've been listening to you
by my whole life. Man, I'm ready to hold me
a dollar, and I'm about glad that I could. Man,
I appreciate y'all.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Y'all, that's awesome.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
Scotlar tell you family, thank you so much, and we
appreciate you.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Buddy. You hang on Jackie's hook you up, all right,
all right?
Speaker 2 (25:00):
I want he.
Speaker 5 (25:04):
Knows what you mean.
Speaker 15 (25:05):
Y'all get from straight up earth Harter.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
Why the many hours hopp of your news?
Speaker 2 (25:16):
About twenty minutes away from dumb crook news Christmas edition?
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Bang don't I'll report good morning, Big Shows on the radio.
Speaker 11 (25:58):
I man.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
Robert Earl Keene gonna join us on the Big Show
tomorrow getting rid of his Christmas tour anyway.
Speaker 11 (26:07):
R E.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
K All started a friendship that was lasted well over
thirty years, maybe about thirty five if would go back
and count them up. All started with this Christmas tune
our favorite boys out of East Texas.
Speaker 14 (26:31):
Mom God drunk and that got drunk at our Christmas party.
We were drinking sham pain, punch and homemade. An little
(26:54):
sister brought a new boy friends. He was some magic can.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
We didn't know what to.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
Think of him.
Speaker 8 (27:08):
Cally sang police Nobby nod for lice, nobby.
Speaker 3 (27:25):
Brother.
Speaker 14 (27:25):
Ken brought his kids with him, the three from his first.
Speaker 8 (27:33):
Wife Lynn.
Speaker 14 (27:35):
And the two iddical twins from his second wife Mary. Now,
of course he brought his new wife. Kay talks all
about the chain smoking while the stereo no gladays gold
(28:03):
no well the first no or the turkey turned the
ball game on. Nick Margarite is winning the Eggnox gone.
(28:28):
Send somebody to the quick pack store. We need some
ice in that extension cord again, A fiend in and
some dim rides a box of tampons and some more
barl lines. HALLAUI everybody say cheese. Merry Christmas from the
(28:57):
man all ran and reeda drove from Harlow. Just I
can't remember how I'm kin to Then when they're trying
(29:22):
to plug.
Speaker 8 (29:23):
Their motor home in Grave blue Ere Christmas.
Speaker 14 (29:28):
Line, cousin DAVIDO, just what went wrong? So we all
waited out on our front law. He threw the breaker
and the lights came on and we.
Speaker 12 (29:47):
Signed side nighte on side.
Speaker 14 (30:04):
Are the turkey turned the ball game, make blood and
marries because we all want send somebody to the stop
and go. We need some celien again, a fig stove,
(30:24):
a bag of lemons, and some pies, spries, a box
of tampons and some say long lines. How ye, everybody
say cheese. Merry Christmas from the maas.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Police moving.
Speaker 6 (31:27):
Good.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Thursday morning, December the fourth, headed toward Christmas time with
a big show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Lesten it.
Speaker 2 (31:38):
It's time for dumb crooked news, dumb crook story sending
by you the big show listeners from all over the world.
The address will follow the special holiday edition. A forty
two year old man was arrested for driving a parade
float while intoxicated during the annual Christmas Parade and Anderson,
(32:00):
South Carolina. According to witnesses, a man appeared to loose
patients with the slow pacing of the parade and began
laying on his horn before starting to pass other floats
and participants in the lineup. Spectators reported that the festively
decorated float was weaving past other parade participants as it
(32:21):
broke free from the procession, with the driver's son and
eighteen other terrified riders still on board. Once clear the
parade route, police ai the driver sped through city streets,
ran red lights, and refused.
Speaker 1 (32:35):
To pull over.
Speaker 2 (32:36):
During a three mile chase with speeds reaching up to
sixty miles an hour. That's fast with a float. Officers
eventually stopped the vehicle and took the man into custody.
He was charged with over three dozen crimes, including dui
eighteen counts of kidnapping, resisting arrests, and as softening an officer.
(32:57):
He was later sent USD to ninety days in jail
and five years probation. They revoked his float request for
the following year. Three members of a shoplifting ring targeted
a Louis Vaton store in Bellevue, Washington, on Black Friday.
The trio included two masked women and one male suspect
(33:20):
wearing a Spandex ski mask, notably without eyeholes. All three
crooks went straight to work, grabbing as many expensive handbags
as they could carry. Within seconds, and two women sprinted
past security and out of the store well. The male
thief was close behind, running full speed toward the exit,
but with one slight miscalculation, he slammed headfirst into the
(33:43):
plate glass window just to the left of the door,
knocked himself out, and that seventeen year old was charged
with attempted robbery. Well, a nineteen year old Stromsburg, Nebraska
woman stole a car over the thanks Giving holiday and
drove it to a nearby town where she robbed a
(34:03):
bank while claiming to have a gun. And she might
have gotten away with it if she hadn't done what
authority say. May many modern criminals can't seem to resist.
She bragged about it on social media.
Speaker 14 (34:15):
Of course.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
It's about I reportedly returned home and, while still wearing
the same clothes from the robbery, recorded herself smoking marijuana,
holding up bundles of cash, and bragging, I just stole
a car and robbed a bank. Now I'm rich. She
titled the seven minute video Chick Bank Robber and posted
(34:39):
it on YouTube, where it instantly it went viral, racking
up millions of views. In it, Sabauta says she's going
to pay off her college loans and go on one
Hella shopping spree. However, her internet fame and her brief
life of crime were both cutting short. Police arrested her
shortly after the video went public. And prosecut computers using
(35:00):
footage as evidence against her. She got eleven to twenty
two years in prison, but she had millions of views.
Forty seven year old suspect drug dealer in Liverpool, England,
decorated his Christmas tree by festooning it with cash and
little bags of cocaine, and then sent pictures of it
(35:24):
to several people on his client list, along with the
caption Who's dreaming of a white Christmas? Well as luck
would have it. Several of them posted the picture to Facebook.
Police trace the image back to the suspect, obtained warrants
for multiple locations, and then the ensuing raid sees nearly
two million dollars in cash and narcotics. The man was
(35:47):
arrested and is now enjoying an extended seven year Holidays
stay with His Majesty's prison service.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
Oh there they go, how.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
Formal and final. In Eureka Springs, Arkansas, fire and police
responded to her residence on Thanksgiving Day after a nine
to one to one caller reported that their grandmother had
accidentally set herself on fire. Well first responders arrived to
a chaotic scene with several family members frantically waving thick
(36:19):
smoke out of the home, so firefighters rushed inside, where
a man holding a fire extinguisher was hysterically screaming, she's
in here, expecting the worst. Crews followed him into the kitchen,
where a topless, seventy seven year old woman was found
setting on the floor completely covered in white powder. Family
(36:41):
members stated that the grandmother had been removing a turkey
from the oven when she somehow managed to set her
shirt sleeve on fire. Another relative saw the flames and yelled, Grandma,
you're on fire. The panic woman then tore off the
burning garment and began jumping and stomping on it. Meanwhile,
the turkey, now fully engulfed in flames, ignited the kitchen curtains,
(37:05):
sending family members running for their lives. Fire officials credit
the woman's thirty four year old grandson with grabbing the
homes fire extinguisher and putting out the blaze, which was
reportedly started by grease from the turkey well. The grandmother
was treated at the scene for minor burns and smoke imlution.
The whole thing was horrifying. The grandson told officers that
(37:28):
image of my topless grandmother.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
Jumping up and down on her flaming blouse.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Will hault me forever.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
In blaze, in slow motion every time I closed my eyes.
Speaker 4 (37:47):
Ah.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
If you have dumb crook news, mail to dumb crook News,
John Bowyn, Billy Peel Box one nine one one one,
Charlotte and Z two way two one nine, or email
to anybody but me at the Big Show dot com
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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