Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Well, well, well, ladies and gentlemen, this is as good
as it gets. Today is free Comedy Friday, and this
is something I've been waiting for.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
What's a brother?
Speaker 1 (00:11):
Because back in August, we were randomly in Austin, Texas.
And while we're in Austin, Texas, we went out to
this nice, fancy dinner and look who shows up out
of the blue, comedian Brian.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
Callen here, guys, but it's a nice color. Prints out
the hues in my skin room. Okay, a phrase twinning
right now?
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Christmas T shirt to his lovely sweater.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Guys.
Speaker 4 (00:38):
I bought it in Canada. It's Canadian Canadian, so nice
Canadian Marino wool.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Oh my god, it's not a big deal. Please let's move. Okay,
you're right, you're right. What am I going to do
with this money? Buy another Tesla?
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Come on, well, you're in Austin now, so it's required, right,
yeah guy from Yeah I think so?
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Yeah, yeah, we were. So we were in Austin.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
We were having this nice dinner and then a mutual
friend of ours calls up Brian because he knows he's
in Austin, and Brian came to dinner with us. So
we had dinner with you, Brian. It was crazy. It
was so random, you know, but it was cool. It
was super cool.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Yeah. So I've been waiting for you to come back
to Sandy killing it on the radio, which is impressive.
It is.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
We're we're on a crazy run right now. Yeah, that's
twenty plus years. Yeah, same station two. Yeah, that's very rare.
That's what time you guys wake up. I get up
at three thirty. Sky gets up a little bit before that.
And then this guy just had a baby a month
of your meditation, I do it here. Yeah, you had
(01:45):
a baby.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Yeah, a month ago. We're a month month and two days.
You got some shoulders on you.
Speaker 5 (01:50):
Yeah, he's a big boy. To twelve point nine pounds
right now.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Is twelve point nine? It was eleven eleven under Yeah, yeah,
you know that's the thing. That's the thing.
Speaker 6 (02:00):
He was born with bird bones. Yeah, six point five.
Speaker 5 (02:07):
Yeah, he's already drinking like seven ounces of milk, unbelieveing.
It's crazy, and he's he's he's we're gonna have to
go to the second diaper number two. Now he started
at one new none of his newborn stuff. You look
like a big guy. I'm I'm only I'm two hundred pounds,
but I'm like five ten.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
He's here, take your pants off and you're not very close.
You're right, steroids, steroids.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
You should see his kid's picture, his poores little kid pictures,
because I mean, the scrawny scary crow.
Speaker 5 (02:41):
You never I was a previous I was only like five.
He looked like a house elf from Harry Potter, Like honestly,
like house looks like a house elf.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Just listen.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Brian is going to be before me at the Grand
Comedy Club, which is great. It's up north, so just
keep driving north and you'll you'll hit it. But it's
a great place to you know, they have an awesome
food there. It's a really cool place. And so for
all our North County folk, you'll see Brian this weekend.
Come shows tonight, a couple of shows tomorrow night. Yes,
(03:13):
welcome back to town.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
I'm always confusing that I do. I was.
Speaker 4 (03:16):
I used to do the American Comedy Club, which I love.
I just love that place. But I don't know my
my somehow my agent got me at the mic Drop,
which is also great.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Yes, I don't know what goes on. And then then
there's like don't forget the comedy store.
Speaker 4 (03:28):
But then you want to be like you want to
be loyal to certain clubs. You do, but then your
agent says that you're doing this, but what about that
because they don't have it opening the schedule. And then
you're like, okay, I hope I'm not.
Speaker 6 (03:41):
Well.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
Does that happen? Do the comedy clubs get mad that
you played a competing comedy club?
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Do you ever hear? I don't know. I just I
just feelie.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
I feel nostalgia because I love the American Comedy Club.
It's amazing. I love the mic Drop Comedy Club. And
it's like, you know, but but but you know it's cool.
What's cool about San Diego is you can do well.
It's it's like another world. You see North County. You know,
everybody's like the.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Different audience.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
Honestly, there's a whole different group of people that are
going to come see.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Yes, I prefer I don't know if they're British. There
pretty high class. Bring you in North County. You don't manage.
You can't jokes. I deserve them. Now.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
What you wear the will you wear the sweater all weekend?
Because it's so fancy? Cream I only wear cream the
Canadian sweater. You have a gay friend who knows fashion.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
My gay friends like you need you need to be
wearing cream and white. That's because these earth tones are
I don't know anything about fashion. That's why I never
got a tattoo. I don't know what looks cool. You
on the other fashion plate. Come on, man, that's that's
(04:53):
some quality of San Diego cotton. And and those are
made underground by my children, not American children. You the
small fingers allowed for good stitching rights around from breaks.
Speaker 2 (05:05):
Don't be all liberal.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Well, it's their little fingers they make you know, they
were able to you know, so really good. It's great.
Hurry up and stop talking. Yeah my shirt, Yes, get
in there, Brian. Are you a big holiday guy? Do
you get pumped for the holidays? And I'll get pumped, okay,
because I studio funny said.
Speaker 4 (05:25):
Because my wife, My wife literally put the Christmas tree
up the day after Halloween.
Speaker 2 (05:29):
Wow, yes, day after This is ridiculous. And then my
ex wife I was over at her house.
Speaker 1 (05:39):
I get along, okay, I got uncomfortable.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
I know my ex wife.
Speaker 4 (05:45):
At the end of the day, my sister had a
Christmas party, was like my girlfriend of nine years, my
ex wife was holding my.
Speaker 6 (05:51):
New kid and I'm a wrapper okay, but.
Speaker 4 (05:57):
She my my my my first wife put the Christmas
tree up the same like two days after Halloween.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
That's crazy.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
Like I'm a massive Christmas guy, as you could tell,
but like I'm not allowed to do it. I'm a
massive Christmas Yeah, I love it.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
I just had that in front of me. What do
you like about it? Is it just it's just it's it's.
Speaker 1 (06:17):
A joyful time, you know, I mean you can't, Like
I hear about people getting stressed.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
I'm like, how can you be stressed at this time?
Like a Santa fun?
Speaker 4 (06:24):
And also and also and also Jesus was born Ryan,
everybody else is going to hell and that's it's great.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
It's like a good friend. I believe it something a
hell fire. Oh man?
Speaker 1 (06:42):
So so because so do you? But do you go
big or do you just sort of you know, I
don't go big at all. My wife does, and then
my my family does. But I had a family that
was my family.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
When I would get Christmas presents, my mother ruined it
because she was Italian and she would always remind me
of how other kids don't get Christmas, so i'd be
my presence to go. You know, some kids get this
famous a lump of coal and a.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
Sack, right, Which did anybody really get that? No? No, right?
Speaker 4 (07:14):
And then my grandmother would double down and say, some
kids get an orange.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
And they're happy. Thanks for filling me with guilt that
I'll never live. I'm not kidding about that.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
Like I think back and like way to ruin it,
like I should be pumped with this train and now I'm.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
Like, you feel like a jerk. Look that.
Speaker 4 (07:34):
My mother is one of those people where I'll be
in Utah. They retired in Deer Valley. It's you want
to talk about Christmas. The Mormons do it right. Oh nice, Wow,
they do it right. When you go when you go
to Salt Lake City and Christmas, it's like the town
(07:56):
and the Grinch when they're just all like, I mean,
it's googill.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
They get all out. I mean just like, wow, snow big,
tell me more. And the kids and there's somebody wearing
a ball and.
Speaker 4 (08:12):
Kids like Merry Christmas having.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Free coco. We just made the skull right. You can't
have alcohol, but you can have the cocoa. So that's cool.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
Wow, part of me that wants to ride in with
a horse and swords with a bunch of mongols.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
I don't know why. Boy just killed the moment.
Speaker 6 (08:35):
Your mom, your mom.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
This is just just pack clouds.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
Is that a slate? No, it's not this crap. He's
taking fools off.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
I'm wearying.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
But a buffalo high stripped across my impossibly I have
his body.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Yeah, wow, that's incredible. Attacked the hall my swords. This
is awful. I got a crimson path down Main Street.
This is awful. It is awful.
Speaker 7 (09:19):
I was in a joyful mood. He did so. I said,
it's a part of me. Okay, just as.
Speaker 4 (09:31):
I have thought about it, Brian, look down, I have
a boner. Yeah that's really it was aggressive.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
Your baby with the bird bones?
Speaker 1 (09:40):
Yea.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
So how are you doing Christmas for your kids?
Speaker 2 (09:45):
So so they'll get nothing?
Speaker 1 (09:46):
And like, okay, character builds.
Speaker 4 (09:52):
No, no, they they they don't listen. My wife goes
all out. But what I was saying about my mother,
and is that chill ruin your day? Not just Christmas?
Were they retired in Utah Deer Valley. We're driving. It's
a beautiful, it's a beautiful sort of afternoon.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
I want to talk more about it, but I'm afraid
you're going to ruin it again, you know, coming to
with the moncles, okay and wild Turkey's what? Well, I'm
not getting frolicking. Sorry, you make it weird. Sorry, it's
(10:33):
your scene. This is your scene.
Speaker 4 (10:34):
That's how females. I just want to tom sounds okay. Anyway,
when I hunt them and killed them, Oh.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
My god, Okay, okay, okay, yeah, sorry, beautiful okay, and then.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Much worse some.
Speaker 6 (10:57):
Time because it may meat better because.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
The adrenaline. Oh my god. Sorry, Okay. So you're in,
You're in, Okay. So as we're driving and.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
You're driving this bucolic hillside and it says that I'm
feeling good. I'm having a conversation with my mother and
she sounds like a blind oracle. She goes, beware, you're
going too fast. There's a moose in this area. Would
know because she's seen a moose. I go, I go,
what are you talking about. You're going too fast. They're
(11:39):
massive animals. If you hit one will be crushed under
its weight. The car won't say that she's from Brooklyn,
but she talks to us.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
She's in she's in Utah.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Okay, just quite enough, but but it's this is the cause.
You hit the moose and I and I said, I'm
not slowing down for a moose, for the one moose
that made dart out in front.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Of us dark, because moose don't go look a car dark.
Speaker 4 (12:14):
I sped up, okay, and she said that she was.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
And then she called and then I said, I'm not gonna.
I don't.
Speaker 4 (12:23):
I'm not falling into your neurotic trap. And when I
said neurotic trap, she said, you're an ill mannered bastard.
Oh my god, not the holiday spirit that I was expecting,
you know, at all? Okay, and then and then and
then she tried to grab the wheel and then I
put hands on my mom. I hit a story.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
That's really gone so hit. I hit a turkey. We
actually hit the moose. And then I went to its
head and I turned its head. Oh my god, he's
a mass I got. This is a wild the worst
story I remember. He's got a piece. I guess.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Go see Brian at the Grand Comedy He really does
the beautiful family stories the Grand Comedy Club and Escundo.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
You know, it's wonderful.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
It was horrible. We just kept getting worse. I didn't
expect it. Aye Greg Comedy Company, asking you though. Two
shows tonight, two shows tomorrow night.
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Brian.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
Great to see you, my friend. Okay, you can if
you want to. You don't know when you're time.
Speaker 4 (13:34):
Your time.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Honestly, they have good food there, so you got a
little food. Watch Brian. It's perfect. That's dark, guys. If
you think I'm funny on the radio,