The Core Question
What conversation has been sitting in the back of your mind, taking up mental bandwidth?
Why We Avoid Conversations
- Hoping it will just go away
- Fear of conflict or discomfort
- Lack of preparation
- Emotional reactivity
The Two Negative Outcomes of Delay
Option 1: Extended delay
- Physical effects: not sleeping, overthinking
- Builds up exhaustion
- When you finally have it, you're depleted
Option 2: React without preparation
- Have it while angry or unprepared
- Don't get the outcome you want
- Damages the relationship
The One Exception
Permission to delay: If you are so emotional that you can't have the conversation without keeping your emotions in check, take processing time. Otherwise, have it early.
The Action Step
- Identify the conversation you've been avoiding
- Set a time: "I'm doing this in two hours"
- Put a little thought into it
- Get it done
- It's not going anywhere (unless they get hit by a bus - and then you'll regret not having it)
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