Brooks Wheelan Disobeys Bridger

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Well, I invited you. Hear I thought I made myself
perfectly clear.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
But you're a guest to my home.

Speaker 1 (00:21):
You gotta come to me empty, And I said, no, guests,
your own presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff,
So how did you dare to surbey me?

Speaker 2 (00:49):
Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Richard Wineger. We're
in the backyard. I'm in a sweatshirt for the first
time in months. The weather is calling for or it
feels like the air quality is probably an F minus.
It's who knows what's going to happen to my throat?

(01:10):
What else is going on? Oh? Yesterday was the we're
only one day out from the I was bullied into
getting the photos taken at j C. Penny by you,
and it went beautifully. I have to thank John Carlow
at the J. C. Penny Portrait Studio. He what a
great attitude. I would consider him probably my number one

(01:31):
creative collaborator at this point. Just a wonderful presence, and
hopefully his career continues to flourish. Is there anything else
that's happening, Not that I can remember or care about.
I'd rather get into the podcast. I adore today's guess.
I think he's so funny. It's Brooks Wheeler.

Speaker 3 (01:51):
That's very nice, Bridget. Thanks for having me, Thanks for coming.
How are you doing good? I just bought a car
twenty minutes ago.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
Twenty minutes ago.

Speaker 4 (01:58):
Yeah, at Whitmers he sold you a car.

Speaker 2 (02:01):
I wouldn't trust him with a car. No, no, no,
no no.

Speaker 3 (02:04):
Well, I had an old I had a twenty twelve
Super Outback that I bought new and I drove it
for two hundred thousand miles and it exploited, like the
transmission broke.

Speaker 4 (02:12):
Oh so all the lights were going off.

Speaker 3 (02:14):
It still kind of runs right, And Witt had like
a twenty twenty one Super Outback, and he's like, I
want a new car. And I was like, I'll just
buy your car, dude, And so we we looked up
how much his car would be if you trade, if
he traded it in, and then I paid him five
hundred dollars.

Speaker 2 (02:30):
Wow, good friend.

Speaker 3 (02:31):
So we circumvented the dealership.

Speaker 2 (02:34):
Right, wow.

Speaker 1 (02:35):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (02:35):
I feel like I would have a hard time buying
from a friend because I want I would want to
talk them down as much as pob Oh.

Speaker 3 (02:40):
No, he was like, how's this sound I go, that
sounds great. And then but yeah, I just wrote a check,
a normal check, minutes ago, for eighteen thousand, five hundred
dollars and you can just do that.

Speaker 2 (02:51):
What a feeling. Yeah, you can write any number you
want on a chest.

Speaker 3 (02:53):
It was crazy. I'm like, ay, this isn't And it's
also such a lateral move. I had a car, so
it sound like I may have an excited right, I'm
just like, what the fuck? All right?

Speaker 5 (03:03):
Here you go?

Speaker 2 (03:04):
Yeah. Usually there's like at least an hour of after
buying a car, You're like, this is a new life,
something exchanged.

Speaker 3 (03:10):
No, I have another car at his house. Now after this,
I'm gonna go over there, drive that car to like CarMax, Okay, right,
get as much as I can for that. I don't know,
five hundred dollars, I don't know. Broken transmission what that
does to a car value? Probably bad? And then ride
my bike back over here to this car. Then go
to the DMV get it fucking registered.

Speaker 2 (03:31):
I hate your day, yeah, and then call.

Speaker 4 (03:33):
Geico and get my insurance on this is just a
fucking hell day.

Speaker 2 (03:37):
Where is Carmacks? Because I think, oh, that's I got
my bike? How how far off a bike ride? Is
that several miles?

Speaker 3 (03:45):
Now that's not bad.

Speaker 2 (03:46):
I mean probably like ten ten. You must be a
real bike rider.

Speaker 3 (03:49):
I used to live like really close to here in
Glass l and I would ride my bike every day
to work in Burbank. Oh that studio.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
Yeah, so that's about ten miles every day.

Speaker 4 (03:58):
It'd be about it's like, yeah, they're in back, was
like twenty eight each day.

Speaker 2 (04:02):
Have you got a helmet on? Oh? Yeah, okay, good,
I'd like to hear that. Ye. I haven't been on
a bike in a long time, and I almost got
pressured into riding one recently and I wasn't sure if
a helmet was going to come into play. Oh really,
I was so scared.

Speaker 3 (04:13):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (04:14):
Then it didn't happen, so I'm safe.

Speaker 3 (04:16):
I love Yeah, I love riding bike span It's my
favorite thing. It's my favorite way to get around town.

Speaker 2 (04:20):
I uh, yeah, I can't remember. I guess I rode
one in Palm Springs briefly. It was more of a
casual through a neighborhood. So I think that that's the
one time I can ride without a helmet, Oh for sure.
But I mean riding to Burbank, what are you doing, Like,
what is that path even?

Speaker 4 (04:34):
No, well there's a bike path.

Speaker 3 (04:36):
There's a bike path, yeah, right by the La River.

Speaker 2 (04:38):
It's really of course, I do a lot of walking.

Speaker 3 (04:41):
Yeah, that little bit's a perfect bike path.

Speaker 2 (04:43):
And I'm always in the way of a bike.

Speaker 3 (04:45):
We were Yeah, yeah, those people who scream around in
that bike path, they need to fucking check themselves, okay,
because they go by like.

Speaker 2 (04:52):
Spoke, you know, spoken. Yeah, of course, little coffee bike.

Speaker 3 (04:55):
Coffee, beer, fucking burgers, and people congregate outside there, and
people are doing like time trials, like right outside of it,
being like you're on the fucking thing.

Speaker 4 (05:04):
I'm like, you gotta slow.

Speaker 3 (05:05):
Down around here.

Speaker 2 (05:05):
No, no, no, no, that's not for time trials, no, exactly,
find your own little track. It's for everything. Yeah, casual walking,
pushing a stroller for sure.

Speaker 3 (05:14):
Yeah. And people are bikes who get mad. It's like, dude,
we are the like I love riding bikes, so I
don't want to give people a bad fucking time with
a mic or whatever an experience.

Speaker 4 (05:23):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (05:23):
So I'm always like if a car like gets my
way a little bit, I'm like, that's okay, you're bigger
than me, you know. If somebody steps out, I'm like,
that's all right. Like I'm out there trying to put
out good vibes.

Speaker 2 (05:32):
For the bike people. I like to hear this because
it is a very sensitive subject between cars, bikes, and people.
I feel like we're all constantly mad at each other
and thinking it's the other person's fault and we're all
in danger of each other in a way. Yeah, And
I think it's because you're adrenaline is through the roof
in any of these situations, and so you're just immediately
ready to be mad at the other person, you know what.

Speaker 3 (05:54):
I I love Jurassic Park, the first one, and in
the opening scene where you see all the dinosaurs and
little dinosaurs running underneath big dinosaurs. I was always like,
that's so crazy, But then I realized that's what we do.
That's a fucking highway with motorcycles and buses and semis.
Like we're doing the opening in Jurassic Park every fucking day.

Speaker 2 (06:13):
Have you been in a bike accident before? Oh?

Speaker 3 (06:15):
Yeah what? Oh yeah a big time?

Speaker 2 (06:17):
What happened?

Speaker 3 (06:18):
So I'm rocking this basket life now. I got a basket,
That's what this is. Yeah, I brought my this is
this of the bike that goes in the front of
the in front of the bike. Yeah, I strapped it
and I didn't strap it down. Was riding, hit a pothole,
this guy bounced out. I went so I hit it,
went over the bars and like landed on my elbow.

Speaker 2 (06:39):
Oh my god, this is is this recent?

Speaker 3 (06:41):
Yeah? This was fourth of July.

Speaker 2 (06:42):
Yeah, because that's a pretty red No, it sucks.

Speaker 3 (06:45):
So I thought I exploded at my elbow like truly.
It was like, okay, this is this is like a
absolute like shattered elbow. So this is a terrible story.
So I go to the I go to the emergency room.
They do all this stuff. It's just turns out to
be like an intusion or something like just joint effusion
is what it was.

Speaker 4 (07:03):
Just Yeah, severe swelling out, swelling of the joint.

Speaker 3 (07:07):
Great. And then that's when I found out they're, oh, yeah,
you're a health insurance ran out. You don't have health insurance.

Speaker 2 (07:11):
It's like, oh what the fall my god? Yeah, I
had eighteen thousand dollars check.

Speaker 3 (07:16):
Yeah, I had no idea Like then I didn't have
health insurance. I had because we have sag forever.

Speaker 2 (07:21):
You knows, right, And then but these places will just
let you.

Speaker 3 (07:24):
They just let me good. I was like, you gotta
let me know.

Speaker 2 (07:27):
So what did you do?

Speaker 3 (07:28):
I fucking med a.

Speaker 4 (07:29):
Pant out of pocket?

Speaker 2 (07:29):
How much is that cost?

Speaker 3 (07:31):
I wasn't too bad, it was a few.

Speaker 2 (07:32):
Thousand dollars okay, but still what a shock. I would
be so mad.

Speaker 3 (07:35):
I just feel dumber that I don't have health insurance
than anything. Made me feel like, really like a bad adult.

Speaker 2 (07:41):
I mean, I think in the entertainment industry, it can
happen at any moment.

Speaker 3 (07:43):
Yeah. Well, they were like, I like called sag and
they're like, yeah, you haven't made like enough money over
these last three years. I'm like, do you know what
the strike in the fucking Yeah?

Speaker 2 (07:51):
Could we mentioned the strike in the you know.

Speaker 3 (07:53):
The global pandemic? We were nobody?

Speaker 2 (07:55):
You know, Okay, there have to be some exceptions to these.
I also, I feel like there's like a cap on
because you obviously contribute when you get paid for these things.
And I feel like, isn't there like a cap Tom
Cruise only pays up to so much. I think that's
that sort of person needs to be paying just as
much percentage as the rest of us.

Speaker 3 (08:15):
Hey, that's that's good. That's good pology.

Speaker 2 (08:17):
I'm here to say this is I'm starting my platform
now and on based on something I barely know about
it and.

Speaker 3 (08:24):
I don't know anything about, like health insurance and stuff
like that.

Speaker 2 (08:27):
Well, I just saw that I think it was. I
could be wrong, like James Vanderbeek or something no longer
has health insurance and is now like selling merch for
his health insurance. It's like these I mean, God bless
these guilds in these unions for a lot of things,
but sometimes it's like maybe a little more protection. Well
it's also the country's fault.

Speaker 4 (08:43):
Yeah, yeah, no, anyway, Yeah, I have been in a
bike wreck and it sucked.

Speaker 2 (08:48):
Was there blood everywhere?

Speaker 3 (08:49):
No, it was. I was actually this is like a
really good shout out for Patagonia. I was wearing a
Patagonia like jacket and it's like my I hit my
elbow in my feeling my skin broke, but not the
fucking jacket. It stayed intact. So holding blood in this jacket,
I'm like, this is a good this's a good jack.

Speaker 2 (09:08):
It's a great bandit.

Speaker 3 (09:09):
Yeah, So it was just like a lot of blood
all over my jacket.

Speaker 2 (09:12):
Do you still have the jacket. Oh yeah, this is
a blood stain.

Speaker 3 (09:16):
Yeah for sure, that's good.

Speaker 2 (09:17):
That's kind of exciting.

Speaker 3 (09:19):
My buddy Mike Burns, he's a really good comic. He
got stabbed one time outside his house. He got robbed
and they stabbed him in.

Speaker 2 (09:25):
The back and what oh yeah, well we'll look at
in a minute.

Speaker 3 (09:28):
But yeah, stabbed him. Uh and he would he would
wear that jacket later. And he had a cool old knife.

Speaker 2 (09:33):
Oh my god, the coolest possible hole you can have.

Speaker 3 (09:36):
It was a very cool worn in jacket.

Speaker 2 (09:39):
I mean what time of dated he get stambed? Night? Yeah,
I guess that's that's when most of the stabbings go.
And did they get away with anything? Uh?

Speaker 4 (09:48):
Yeah, they didn't catch the guy took his wallet and.

Speaker 2 (09:50):
They took his wallet. Yeah wow, I mean that's a
I mean a high stakes thing to take somebody's wallet.

Speaker 3 (09:55):
He's like, when the guy stabbed him, Burns said, he goes,
you fucking stabbed me.

Speaker 2 (09:59):
Just take whatever you want. He hurt me. I would
give up anything before being staffed. Right, Well, that's a
bad robbery.

Speaker 3 (10:09):
Yeah, don't just don't stab, just threaten. Threaten.

Speaker 2 (10:14):
Start with a nice threat, thre and then go from there.
If you're not willing to give up the money, then
maybe turned to actual violence. Yes, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (10:24):
Have you ever been uh like in a bad accident.

Speaker 2 (10:28):
Have I been in a bad accident? Uh? If I have,
I've forgotten it. Would I've been in a during the pandemic,
I got rear ended by a man. I can't say
his full name. His middle name was Mallory, and he
was very sweet about it. I started crying, even though
he just but it's just like a shock of like, oh,

(10:49):
I don't know what's happening.

Speaker 3 (10:50):
No, it's weird, like getting in a car wreck because
you feel safe in your car and you're like, these
can get hit.

Speaker 2 (10:55):
They can get hit all the time. Yeah, And I
mean I started getting really scared of being on planes,
and I just keep reminding myself, well, I'm way more.
I'm such a risk in my car to myself and
others all the time, So hopefully this is okay.

Speaker 3 (11:08):
That's how I feel about plane crashes. I'm like that
that's the way to go, because it's not your fault.

Speaker 2 (11:14):
It's not your fault.

Speaker 3 (11:16):
Yeah, that's all. Whenever I die, I wanted people to
not be like that's what you get.

Speaker 2 (11:20):
Pretty embarrassing.

Speaker 3 (11:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (11:23):
Yeah, I think a plane crash, you due like you
don't even experience it. Essentially, it'll be a little light
screaming and it's over.

Speaker 3 (11:29):
I think my last words. But I always try to
be too cool, you know, Like I truly it was
like this plane goes down, people would be screaming. I'd
be I think my last words would be like this
is lame, you Like, I would just try to like
under like no, thank you to this.

Speaker 2 (11:44):
Like why yeah, yeah, I don't know. I do think
I would be probably the worst person on the plane
ever and be like, just relax, shut up, we're having
a hard enough time on here already, stop screaming. I
was last year we were flying back from we were
on I think it's called aer Lingus. It's an Irish airline.

(12:07):
I'm gonna say it's a bad airline.

Speaker 3 (12:09):
Oh yeah, for sure.

Speaker 2 (12:10):
The scariest flight of my entire life. People were screaming
on it. And what I ended up doing is like
I said, I'm just going to put on some music
I really enjoy and die to this.

Speaker 3 (12:18):
Oh wow.

Speaker 2 (12:19):
And then we landed and everything was fine, But it
was to have people clap after landing because they thought
everyone was going to die. It's such a feeling, that's crazy.

Speaker 3 (12:29):
Yeah. One time I was flying from like Iowa to
uh to like Austin or something, you know, and then
you're going to get some not a lot like LA
to New York. Like everybody's they we make this trip
often constantly. But you fly out of you know, Cedar Rapids,
you're gonna get a couple first time flyings, right, And
I was a first time flyer, and see when I
grew up in Cedar, I was there. But like we

(12:50):
hit a little turbule incident. This woman screamed out, let
christ blood be on this plane?

Speaker 2 (12:54):
And I was like, what's amazing?

Speaker 3 (12:59):
Holy any what?

Speaker 2 (13:01):
Yeah? What is that even supposed to I don't know,
I've never heard something like that.

Speaker 3 (13:06):
Let Christ's blood be on this plane.

Speaker 2 (13:08):
Wow, that's that feels like she wants it to go down.
I don't know, man, it's so gothic.

Speaker 3 (13:13):
It was crazy.

Speaker 2 (13:15):
Good for her. Yeah, I'm gonna start screaming that constant.

Speaker 3 (13:18):
Any sort of inconvenience, let Christ's blood be in this podcast.

Speaker 2 (13:25):
That's merge. Have you been to Mexico City? No, I
was there last week and I went to a This
is totally just a left turn, but I went to
a Lucha libre wrestling match.

Speaker 3 (13:35):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (13:36):
Have you been to any professional wrestling before?

Speaker 3 (13:38):
A lot I've been to. Yeah, I love pro wrestling.
I've been at the Lucha Libre one here in La
that they do. Yeah, it's every Halloween. I've got a
couple of times. It's the freakin' best.

Speaker 2 (13:48):
What a feeling. Yeah, I even felt so I've never
felt so free to boo and I was on top
of the world.

Speaker 4 (13:55):
Oh my god, I love pro wrestling.

Speaker 2 (13:56):
To just get to actively boo something.

Speaker 3 (13:58):
I mean, a Mexico City Pro wrestling event that's gonna be.

Speaker 2 (14:00):
So fun, incredible. Yeah, and they've got the dancing ladies,
they've got, I mean, everything about it was unlike anything
I could have possibly imagined.

Speaker 3 (14:10):
That's really fun. That's a very fun story that you have. Now,
that's more fun than being in an accident.

Speaker 2 (14:15):
So I think it's a one to one. I was, okay,
how many, Like when did you start going to wrestling?
That just as an adulter a kid.

Speaker 3 (14:22):
Eighth grade, probably as a group in Iowa. So it's
not like they're really rocking through there. A lot, right,
But I remember like seeing like the Undertaker versus like Caine.

Speaker 2 (14:31):
That's very like.

Speaker 3 (14:33):
Seventh grade. I remember I bought a stone cold VHS
and a stone cold middle finger instead of number one
of he's giving the finger. And then I left my
stone cold VHS, which was like forty bucks at in
my seats at the five Season Center and Cedar Rapids,
and like I had to like beg them to let
me back in so I could go get my stone cold.

Speaker 2 (14:51):
They let you get back, Yeah, they do. It's a
valuable frantic guy. Where's the Undertaker?

Speaker 1 (14:58):
Now?

Speaker 2 (14:58):
Do you think.

Speaker 3 (15:00):
Heavily in politics and religious and has the podcast that
Trump did the other day? I know exactly. I wish
I didn't know where the Undertaker.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
Was Undertaker that show.

Speaker 3 (15:09):
The Undertaker is a very right wing politics and he's
into Jesus.

Speaker 2 (15:14):
Now what's his actual name?

Speaker 1 (15:16):
Uh?

Speaker 3 (15:16):
Fuck? What is this? Oh gosh, I feel like an
asshole for not knowing this because I've been you know.

Speaker 2 (15:21):
Every other detail about his biography?

Speaker 4 (15:24):
Well fuck, what is his name? The Undertaker? Can Uh,
I'll look it up.

Speaker 3 (15:27):
Mark William Calloway, Mark.

Speaker 2 (15:29):
Calloway first, Mark Mark Ye, Mark Mark the Undertaker.

Speaker 3 (15:33):
Yeah, uh, dude. Trump did his podcast and it was
like Trump was just asking him about pro wrestling, and
it was like the most engaged I've ever seen Donald Trump.
He was like, what happened? Have you ever really been hurt?
He's like yeah a couple of times. And I was like,
this is where Trump should be.

Speaker 2 (15:48):
He should be doing this, doing the former wrestling podcast, asking.

Speaker 3 (15:52):
Questions old people ask to cool rest.

Speaker 2 (15:54):
Yeah, wow, that's really interesting. And does the Undertaker still
wear makeup or anything? Or is he like now got
a mouse cut? No suit?

Speaker 3 (16:02):
Now, I don't think he's just rocking a suit, but
all normal ship still you know, the dark under Underlord
or whatever.

Speaker 2 (16:10):
That's a real that's uh, that's hard to hear. That's
hard to hear. Are there any pro wrestlers that have
taken a good turn or mcfully?

Speaker 3 (16:18):
Yeah, he came out hard, like I love this ship.
Mcfully came out. He's like, I respect the Undertaker, I
respect them. We have different opinions, but like he's wrong,
you know, like there's like ex wrestlers like beefing about politics.
It's great.

Speaker 2 (16:30):
Wow, I really like that. I'm trying to think of
other Kine.

Speaker 3 (16:33):
Is a fucking uh he's like a mayor of like Knoxville, Tennessee,
like ran for governor and ship.

Speaker 2 (16:40):
I mean Jesse Ventura, I guess is the most famous
all of them. He did a great turn.

Speaker 3 (16:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (16:45):
He was probably maybe one of the first to really
like yeah, like he.

Speaker 3 (16:48):
Straight up got whole coke and to be like, I'm
gonna be president for real because like the body is
a governor, I'm a hulk. I can do president. And truthfully,
it only took like four more years before like different
reality star was like adi president.

Speaker 2 (17:02):
Called for all of that to kind of flow out
of professional wrestling.

Speaker 3 (17:08):
They're great.

Speaker 2 (17:09):
None of us could have ever ever possibly expected this
to happen.

Speaker 3 (17:12):
Now, who else?

Speaker 2 (17:13):
I mean, Karl Malone was not a he was more
of a guest star. I remember him being in him
and Dennis Rodman, oh right, yeah, kind of that weird
crossover for a time. Who else did I kind of
is those the only ones I can name. I guess
Jake's Snake because he's still alive.

Speaker 3 (17:29):
Jake the Snake is in and out of like I
think so Diamond Dallas Page runs like this really great
rehab place. Okay, I think Jake the Snake moved in
there and got sober.

Speaker 2 (17:39):
Wow. And do you rehab just for wrestlers.

Speaker 3 (17:42):
I don't know. It's called DDP yoga. He teaches yoga. Yeah,
and uh, save like you know, saving lives.

Speaker 2 (17:49):
I want to hear about more good things that former
pro wrestlers are doing.

Speaker 4 (17:52):
Yeah, Diamondalla's page is crushing it.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (17:56):
I think he's probably the most influential because, like, know, wrestlers,
it's just such a fucking crazy job. You know, you
get addicted to pills, you have to go out.

Speaker 2 (18:03):
There wrestling getting kind of slamm Yeah.

Speaker 3 (18:06):
Well still, I mean back pain and ship and then
DDP like teachers how to do yoga and be sober.

Speaker 2 (18:10):
And I'm like so lovely to rocks, so lovely to hear.
Did you ever wrestle in middle or high school? Uh?

Speaker 3 (18:17):
And like actual wrestling?

Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (18:19):
Yeah, that was like my whole life. Oh reason, Yeah,
my entire life was like college Olympic wrestling.

Speaker 2 (18:25):
How did we stumble upon this? This is wonderful. I
mean Iowa I was wrestling place.

Speaker 3 (18:30):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (18:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (18:31):
My brother is the head coach of West de mooin Valley,
which is the biggest high school in Iowa for wrestling. Okay,
I was just at a wrestling a couple of wrestling
tournaments two weeks ago.

Speaker 2 (18:40):
My nephews incredible, and they're both the wrestlers.

Speaker 4 (18:43):
All three of them are, yeah, wrestling. There's three of
them wrestling.

Speaker 1 (18:46):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (18:46):
I two of the brothers who are really good. They
wrestled in college. I was decent, but like I wasn't
good enough to wrestle division one, So I'm like, I
don't know, I'm not gonna go to division three.

Speaker 2 (18:56):
Right, No? No, no no.

Speaker 3 (18:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (18:58):
And the movie that's that movie Fox Catch Shirt. Does
that take place in Iowa?

Speaker 4 (19:02):
No, that's in Pennsylvania. That's John du pont.

Speaker 3 (19:04):
I remember when uh fucking Dave Schultz was killed, Like
I remember the day. It was nineteen ninety five, and
my brother came home crying because he was his favorite wrestler.
He's like, Dave Schultz got fucking murdered, and I was like,
what did He was making a comeback for the Olympics
in ninety six. I was all jacked up for that, right.

Speaker 2 (19:20):
Yeah. I have kind of like a weird memory of
sitting in the dentist office as a kid, like flipping
through Newsweek and seeing that.

Speaker 4 (19:25):
Yeah, I mean it was fucking crazy.

Speaker 2 (19:27):
Yeah, that's a what an end to all of that.

Speaker 4 (19:30):
Yeah, Fox Catcher was decent.

Speaker 3 (19:32):
It was good. It was a good movie. I liked
It's the wrestling community like it's so fucking up its
own ass. They're like, that's not really realistic. I'm like,
shut up, we have a movie.

Speaker 2 (19:39):
Well did they get wrong about it? Does Steve Carell
have some sort of prosthetic?

Speaker 1 (19:42):
Was it?

Speaker 2 (19:42):
Ye?

Speaker 3 (19:43):
A weird nose?

Speaker 2 (19:43):
There's nose? Is okay? Yeah? I wonder what they got
wrong about it?

Speaker 3 (19:48):
Well, I mean Hollywood told the story about it like
a really beloved American wrestler, and then so the resting
community is like, that's not what I don't know any
people who know too much about something. They're like, it's
not what happened, and we're.

Speaker 2 (19:59):
Ready to an idiot. They had to get it into
under two.

Speaker 4 (20:02):
Hours, Yeah, yeah exactly.

Speaker 2 (20:04):
And they had to make Steve Carell seem kind of likable.

Speaker 3 (20:07):
Yeah yeah, they were like they like made his murder
like likable or whatever. I'm like, yeah, that's fair. I
had one of the best days. Did you ever ever, like,
have you ever had like a perfect in New York day?

Speaker 2 (20:16):
Of course?

Speaker 4 (20:17):
So Fox Catcher was part of my perfect New York
day one time.

Speaker 2 (20:20):
What else happened?

Speaker 3 (20:21):
I was just walking and I knew that movie was
coming out or in like are they were making it
or something? And I was walking in on Houston in
the Lower East Side. I like dropped my girlfriend off
at her job, like walked her to work, and I
had like the week off of s and all that
week and was just walking and then I saw like this,
this theater I really like called Sunshine Theater. It's not

(20:41):
around anymore, but it was perfect. It was on Houston
and like a okay, it was just like the perfect
shitty theater. You can bring whatever you want in here.
And I saw Fox Catcher. I was like Fox Sketcher's out.
It was like a Tuesday. I'm like, it's a fucking out.
Like I'm so dialed into this world. And I was like,
this is great. I went to the Whole Foods, got
like two beers, like two fun beers, and like threw

(21:03):
them in my pocket, went in empty theater. Oh, Fox Catcher,
middle of the day, two fun beers.

Speaker 4 (21:09):
I like walked down. I was like, New York is
a magical city.

Speaker 2 (21:12):
Oh that's so low.

Speaker 3 (21:13):
It was so fun.

Speaker 2 (21:14):
Yes, that sounds wonderful.

Speaker 3 (21:15):
Yeah, I was.

Speaker 2 (21:17):
I had kind of a I wouldn't say bad, but
should have been better. In New York Day. A couple
of months ago, I went to this place called I've
kind of talked too much about on this podcast Heart Island.
Have you heard of this where they bury all of
the unclaimed bodies. What they buried like a million bodies
there where it's like up near the Bronx. You have
to take a little ferry to it. They just kind

(21:39):
of opened it to the public for the last year.
But and I was very excited to go. They've ripped.
There was also like a like an insane asylum there.
At one point there was a sanatorium.

Speaker 3 (21:50):
Okay a kid, everybody lives. There's gonna be crazy. It's
a very spooky bodies everywhere.

Speaker 2 (21:54):
They tore down all the spooky building, which I wanted
to see.

Speaker 4 (21:57):
Yeah, it used to be a school, then it became
an insane is only came.

Speaker 2 (22:00):
To the carnival. This is crazy, But we went out.
We went out there. The wind was blasting. I ended
up with a horrible cold. It was not the experience
I was looking for. It was not a perfect New
York Day. But I had to do it on Murder Island.

Speaker 3 (22:17):
Yeah. Yeah, it just wasn't as fun as I thought.

Speaker 2 (22:20):
No shit, it wasn't kind of the light breezy day
I was expecting. Yah. I'm trying to think if I've
ever like what really great New York days I've had?
There are usually ones where you're just stumbling around and
find exactly.

Speaker 4 (22:32):
You can't plan it.

Speaker 2 (22:32):
You just like, holy shit, yeaheah, like, oh here's something
I want to eat everything, so we easy.

Speaker 3 (22:37):
It's also like, look, I don't love New York, but
it is like the only city where you, in the
middle of the day can run into somebody completely on
accident and then you're both just like you want to
fuck around.

Speaker 2 (22:48):
All day, no feeling of the there's nothing like it.

Speaker 3 (22:51):
Yeah, this is gonna happen in LA.

Speaker 2 (22:52):
I've tried to force it.

Speaker 4 (22:53):
Oh yeah, you can't force it.

Speaker 2 (22:55):
You can't. No one will get into it. I've even
tried to force like, because another thing I love about
New York is just like tech. Someone you want to
get dinner now, right, you want to do something now.
I've tried that here, maybe one in a hundred times.
Does it work?

Speaker 4 (23:06):
Dude?

Speaker 3 (23:07):
I had my other friend Carmen Christopher. The other day.
I hit him up before the show. I was like,
do you want to get dinner? And he was like,
day of plans. I'm busy.

Speaker 2 (23:15):
I'm like, oh, it makes me so mad.

Speaker 3 (23:18):
We're going to the same show.

Speaker 2 (23:19):
Do you want to go doing? Yeah? Yeah, I just
think that if we all kind of just got on
the same page, we just accepted that that could happen.
It's possible.

Speaker 3 (23:28):
It is possible.

Speaker 2 (23:29):
I've seen it happen once, so I'm just be able
to happen again.

Speaker 3 (23:32):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (23:32):
Yeah. It's very frustrating for me because sometimes you just
have the afternoon You're like, why don't I do something?

Speaker 4 (23:38):
Absolutely? Yeah, that's I mean, yeah.

Speaker 2 (23:40):
Here, it's just like, well you'll be doing that thing
alone for sure.

Speaker 3 (23:44):
What I do love about LA the reason I live
here and love it and don't live in New York
City is I like California.

Speaker 4 (23:51):
Like I like being able to be like I don't
get anything tomorrow.

Speaker 3 (23:53):
I can go to Joshua Tree tonight right right and
just fuck around Like That's what I like.

Speaker 4 (23:58):
But in New York You're like, I gotta stay here.

Speaker 2 (24:00):
You're kind of trapped on Yes, it's an island and yeah,
like any out has to be a complete plan.

Speaker 3 (24:06):
Yeah, truly. I was having a melt I was having
like a meltdown over Thanksgiving, like what the year one
of the years I was living there, and I was like,
I just got to get the fuck out of here.
There's no rental cars, so I had to rent a
van and then drove it, drove like a fucking like
a U haul van like I was supposed to. I
was like, I just gotta leave. Me and my girlfriend
just drove it out to like, you know, some shitty

(24:27):
lake like fucking I don't know, and the cat skills
and it's awful and it sucks so bad, but.

Speaker 2 (24:33):
We're like this is nice, Like of course it feels incredible. Matter.

Speaker 3 (24:37):
I was like, if I drove from LA to this lake,
I would be like gross ruined. Yeah, but out of
New York, I'm like, this is an incredible lake.

Speaker 2 (24:47):
In a U all. Yeah, did you sleep in the van? No?

Speaker 3 (24:50):
I had a tent a lot right.

Speaker 2 (24:52):
You're a very outdoorsy person, Yeah, I dig it. How
often are you camping?

Speaker 4 (24:57):
At least once a month?

Speaker 2 (25:00):
Wow? That's incredible. Yeah, And is it mostly spontaneous camping
or is it?

Speaker 3 (25:03):
Yeah, Okay, it's like that's why my old car broke is.
I just had kind of a little freak out and
drove to fucking Canada, camping along the way.

Speaker 2 (25:11):
Oh my god, we're in Canada, Whistler, okay, like north
of Vancouver. Oh sure, I feel like I've seen some
beautiful photos.

Speaker 3 (25:18):
Yeah, that's like my go to is anytime I'm like
have a big life change, am I get me the
fuck out of here for a little bit. Yeah? I
like went through breakup, got sad and was like I
could I need to go be alone for a minute.

Speaker 2 (25:30):
Oh I wish I had the confidence in myself to
do that. You have to build up to it, right, Yeah,
but I just I feel like I could easily be
attacked by any animal and taken down. Yep, it doesn't
matter the size. Yeah. So that's my big fear.

Speaker 4 (25:44):
It is scary camping alone, like in Grizzly Country.

Speaker 2 (25:47):
Have you had any like close encounters with animals?

Speaker 6 (25:50):
Mm?

Speaker 4 (25:51):
I mean I got charged it by like an elk.

Speaker 2 (25:54):
I think that counts. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (25:55):
I was at the Grand Canyon and I got too close.

Speaker 2 (26:00):
How far away was it?

Speaker 3 (26:01):
Dude?

Speaker 4 (26:01):
It like came at me hard, like I don't know
it like touched me.

Speaker 2 (26:06):
It touched you dove into a bush.

Speaker 3 (26:09):
It's like Elmer, Yeah, I was like the fuck, Yeah.

Speaker 2 (26:13):
Did it hurt you? Now?

Speaker 3 (26:14):
The bush hurt me?

Speaker 2 (26:15):
Okay? Sure?

Speaker 3 (26:16):
Yeah. But with camping, like I've seen, I've seen a
lot of bears, but never like when I those always
like I'm in my car and there's like a bear
on this like somewhere, you know, right, never just run
into a bear.

Speaker 2 (26:30):
Right. I've seen a bear in person in Alaska, but
it was from Afar. And where'd you go to Alaska?

Speaker 3 (26:36):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (26:37):
I wish I could remember. It was in I think
it was in tenth grade. I want with my dad,
my brother and I mean really the only detail of
this trip is that it wasn't an Airbnb at the time.
It was like some ladies thing or whatever. But my
brother had to borrow her computer to get on eBay.
This was long before like anyone had their own laptop.
And then we stumbled into her online life, which was

(26:57):
her name was Lusty Lady Linda, oh, and just all
of these things, and she'd like been like it wasn't
even googling at that point. Maybe it was like googling
like camera showers or shower cameras, So it's like, who
knows what footage is out there of me as a
tenth grader. Jesus, it might be in Lady Lusty Ladies eBay.

(27:17):
In at last he was selling Pokemon cards. He worked
at what was called Software et cetera. It's no game
Stop or whatever, and I think he and his like
coworker were like stealing boxes of Pokemon cards from the
company and selling them on.

Speaker 4 (27:33):
I yeah, I used to work at this cave.

Speaker 3 (27:35):
I was a tour guy at a cave crystal a
cave and outside the Bukeuy a dream job? No, No,
not a dream job. I thought it would be a
dream drop truly, honestly worst job I ever had my
whole fucking life. What the only job I've ever been
driving there and thought, if I wreck my car, I
don't have to go to work. I would rather deal
with the wrecked car than going to fucking jobs. I

(27:58):
tried to quit a bunch and the lady would be like,
sometimes you just do stuff you don't want to do
in life, and I'd be like, all right, I'll be here, yeah,
and she would like call my house and leave messages
being like Brooks, you have a shift tomorrow. You know
it was fucking awful, dude, to be like eight hour shifts,
you give one two or every thirty minutes. It's also
a tourist trap, so everyone's coming through is disappointed. You
just have to look at their faces while they were like,

(28:19):
what the fuck am I doing here? I just got
ripped off, and I'm like, sorry, let's walk around this tunnel.
Someone dug out for thirty minutes and then at the end,
I'm gonna put five dollars in my hand and ask
for a tip. And I got one in a whole
fucking year, and dude, and like when it was so awful,
then as soon as you get out of that cave,
there's another cue of people ready to go. So you
just in the minds all day giving this, giving fucking

(28:41):
sixteen tours that are awful, the most boring shit in
the world. And the lady was Nina's Hell and she
would say like she would also listen to fucking Casey
Kase and like bubblegum pop. So anytime I hear any
sixties pop, I'm like, I'm back in the cave. I
fucking hate this. It's it's such a trigger, and this
woman every time she pissed me off, I made a rule.
I'm like, I'm fucking stealing something from her. So my

(29:01):
trunk was just nothing but cave artifacts and like shirts
and souvenirs and like dumb knickknacks and birds and stuff.
And my mom one time she like found my cash
of all the cave stuff and she was like, what
do you why do you have all this?

Speaker 2 (29:15):
Let's plan for any of that is, what do you
have this?

Speaker 3 (29:18):
And I was like, they give it to me at
the cave. And she said, if I call the cave,
will they say that they gave you these items? And
I said, don't call the cave.

Speaker 2 (29:29):
How do you call the cave?

Speaker 4 (29:30):
Oh you could call the cave.

Speaker 2 (29:33):
There's a sticking phone ringing in that's empty.

Speaker 3 (29:35):
Yeah. I have this whole other side podcast up called
Entry Level about early jobs, and the whole through line
for this fucking thing is me getting out my frustration
about the cave, and listeners have gone on tours of
the cave. You can go to her, and every single
fucking review back to me is it's worse than you said.

Speaker 2 (29:51):
Oh you're kidding.

Speaker 3 (29:52):
Every single person's like it's worse. It's actually worse than
I thought it could be.

Speaker 2 (29:57):
How are they getting people into this cave? You go
into a gift show, Like, how are they advertising it
to get anyone in there? If it's such a trap?
It sounds they're promising crystals.

Speaker 3 (30:07):
Crystal Lake Cave. There's a tiny, little fucking puddle in there.
It feuds with the Field of Dreams. She had dreams
because the Field.

Speaker 2 (30:16):
Of Dreams is like dreams are real from another tourist
traps that made famous by the was it they built
it for the movie? Okay, for the movie. The ghosts
weren't there prior to the movie.

Speaker 3 (30:26):
No, So she would be like sometimes she's like, I've
bet a Field of Dreams. It's fucking busy today, you know,
Like this is the first show I ever sold was
It was called Crystal Lake Cave, Nature's Masterpiece. It was
about a family who owns that cave.

Speaker 2 (30:37):
Let's get that back in the market.

Speaker 3 (30:39):
I would love to.

Speaker 2 (30:40):
I mean it's probably been a few years.

Speaker 4 (30:41):
Just yeah, I told him, I was like twenty three.

Speaker 2 (30:43):
All of those executives are dead.

Speaker 3 (30:45):
Yeah, Comedy Central in fact, is dead. I mean those
people all yeah, a long time because it was for
Comedy Central, and I was like, this is great.

Speaker 2 (30:51):
It's time to bring it back to the market. I
think now more than ever, we need a cave show.

Speaker 3 (30:56):
Yeah. Well just it was about feuding tourist traps. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (31:01):
And were you excited when you first got that job.

Speaker 4 (31:03):
I thought it was gonna fucking rock.

Speaker 2 (31:05):
Had you been in the caves to it?

Speaker 1 (31:06):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (31:06):
Okay, so this I thought it was gonna be so cool.
And then like immediately pond walking in, You're just like,
this is kind of a dark, damp thing.

Speaker 3 (31:14):
It was awful. Yeah. My friend Sam Wilson worked there too,
and we had this idea. We both hate it working
there so fucking much. We're fifteen and a half. We
hated it, and we had this idea where we're like,
because one of us would open and the other one
would close, and what we were gonna do was we're
gonna keep the key because you'd have to turn it
in or whatever, but we were gonna keep the key.

(31:36):
He closes, We're gonna go get a copy made, and
then he's gonna give me the copy it so when
I open, I have the key, and now we have
the key to the fucking cave. This is he and
then in ten years we're gonna go in there with
bats and break everything. That's how we were like when
we're twenty five, I think enough time will pass it.
They won't think it's us, but we need to break this.
We need to destroy this fucking place.

Speaker 2 (31:58):
Wait, so did you get an extra key?

Speaker 3 (32:00):
No, sam Plitt had for himself. He staid for himself.
When I tried to quit a couple of times, she's like, no.

Speaker 2 (32:07):
He's trapped here. And wait, she was playing the music
through the cave, so she's like playing when you.

Speaker 3 (32:13):
Go into Yeah, leader of the pack that's in the
gift shop, just blasting. I was like, can we listen
to other music? And she goes, when you want a business,
you can listen. What do you want to listen to?

Speaker 2 (32:21):
Did she own the cave? Yes? How do you own
a cave? Hey?

Speaker 3 (32:24):
Fucking dug it out.

Speaker 2 (32:27):
That's the one one bit of real estate she owns.
It's all underground. The teenagers hate.

Speaker 3 (32:32):
Yeah, And like when I went somebody told me recently
because I do talk about the cave lot, they were like, hey,
the woman died that you were talking about. I was like,
oh shit, And then I was like, ah, you know
that's how. And I look and this was so long ago.
It was like her daughter had passed away. Like they
were like, we didn't even know there was an older one.
I go, oh, there's a meaner one.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
Yeah, the whole family's dance.

Speaker 3 (32:56):
Yeah, I don't think so. But because I did go back, uh,
I went back a few years ago to be like,
what's this all about? You know? I was like been
talking about a lot on the pod did like a
pod from outside and went in. I was like, I
used to do give tours here and they're like okay.
I was like could I go down? And they're like
twenty dollars like you no way, oh absolutely yes that happened.

(33:17):
Wouldn't let me even poke my head in there. Twenty dollars.

Speaker 2 (33:20):
Twenty dollars just a lot to go through a bad cave, to.

Speaker 3 (33:22):
Go through a bad cave. My family came one time
when I was given tours and they were visiting from Missouria.
I was like, can I show them the cave and
she's like absolutely yes. It was nine dollars and she's
like nine dollars person.

Speaker 5 (33:31):
I'm like, I can't exp discount, no, no one please,
Like it's just me and her like, oh, fucking squirrel
one time drank a bunch of fermented fruit and got
hammered because it was all like fucking boozed up, and
she was like, oh, sh had the squirrels drunk again?

Speaker 3 (33:47):
I'm like this guy again.

Speaker 2 (33:49):
This is my favorite cave on Earth.

Speaker 3 (33:51):
I love a snake got loose. Snakes were in the
cave one time. She gave me a rake and said
take care of it. I did go in a hole
to fight snakes here. I didn't do that though I
was down there kidding you.

Speaker 2 (34:04):
Job is worth fighting a snake for. Have you been
in any good caves?

Speaker 3 (34:08):
Now? It's ruined for me.

Speaker 2 (34:09):
Oh, to have the whole concept of caves ruined, absolutely ruined.

Speaker 4 (34:13):
Yeah, I mean, people are you should go to Carlsbad Cavern.

Speaker 2 (34:16):
I don't want to go there so bad. I love
the idea of caves and I never go in.

Speaker 3 (34:21):
A cave underground warned you kind of.

Speaker 2 (34:24):
Do expect them to be like more like Hobbit or
you know, exciting, and then you get in one window
it's just rock. Yeah, just underground rock. Have you been
to an underground cave or wow lake?

Speaker 3 (34:36):
Underground lake?

Speaker 2 (34:38):
Yes, this is my dream to go to an under
I don't know what that is.

Speaker 3 (34:42):
Yeah, it's I've done that. Yeah, in like uh outside
of Tuloom, this place called Coba Snows. You go down
like basically a well and it opens up into this
fucking huge cavern and you swim in there.

Speaker 4 (34:55):
That to me is amazing. Yeah, it was really cool.

Speaker 2 (34:59):
I would love to be a life guarded an underground lake.

Speaker 4 (35:01):
Oh those the ones in Mexico do not have the
lifeguard And.

Speaker 2 (35:05):
Actually that is the one lifeguard job that makes sense
for my as someone who could. Yes, so we so
easily burned. So if anyone's looking for an underground lifeguard, that's.

Speaker 3 (35:14):
A good idea, not a bad idea. It's also fun
when people are like, so what are you doing, You're like,
I'm a lifeguard. Leave out the undergroundard Like, no fucking way.

Speaker 2 (35:22):
That feels like a new bay Watch spinoff. Yeah, theay
Watch Beneath Earth. They've got two. Then maybe that's a
spin off of your show that we're going to take
back to the market.

Speaker 3 (35:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (35:31):
I like this you're saying. I think we're spinning some ideas.

Speaker 3 (35:34):
And also I don't even need to get the rights
to Crystal Lake cave because they will not know that
the show happens.

Speaker 2 (35:40):
I will get it to them.

Speaker 3 (35:41):
I've talked about this cave so fucking much and they
have never I used to email them.

Speaker 2 (35:48):
They like the closest thing they have to modern pop
culture is like mister Postman.

Speaker 3 (35:51):
Yeah, wait what the song? Oh oh yes, yeah, of
course I've blocked all that shit out. I used to
prank email her, like asking if I could rent out
the cave and stuff. I want to have paint so
I want to have a paintball tournament down there. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (36:06):
She'd be like, no, did you ever get close to booking.

Speaker 3 (36:09):
And you can't book a cave? She wouldn't not even available.

Speaker 2 (36:12):
I was just a wedding under in the cave.

Speaker 3 (36:16):
I should find these emails because it always like it
was like, I was like, you should you should publish those?

Speaker 4 (36:20):
Yeah, it was I think.

Speaker 3 (36:21):
I was like, We're gonna have her family reunion at
the cave, and she's like, you can't have your family
reunion at the cave and go try and stop us.
You don't know what we look like.

Speaker 2 (36:29):
Incredible? Yeah, well, I honestly could talk to you for
the next three hours about caves. Yes, but we have
to move on.

Speaker 4 (36:36):
Yeah, I gotta go to sell a car.

Speaker 2 (36:38):
Yes, you've got to get insurance, et cetera. And there's
something way more important that I need to talk about,
something way more upsetting, at least for me, which the
podcast is called.

Speaker 3 (36:46):
I said no gifts, yeah, and I know you said it,
but I just.

Speaker 2 (36:50):
Decided to be awful today. You woke up and decided
to ruin my day. I did you brought three gifts
to the podcast?

Speaker 4 (36:57):
Well, they're a set.

Speaker 2 (36:58):
Oh, it's a set, so it counts as one gift.

Speaker 3 (37:00):
Yeah, I found it moving, you found it moving. Yeah,
I just moved as well.

Speaker 2 (37:06):
Okay, they're beautifully wrapped, like three little cylinders wrapped in tinfoil. Yes,
and I assume if I unwrapped one, i'll know what
the other two are. Are they Well, they're slightly different,
they're slightly different varia. So let's open this one first.
I don't think we've ever unwrapped tinfoil on the podcast.

Speaker 3 (37:26):
I was at wits house and I said, you got
anything for these things? So this is fun.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
Oh? Well, the first one I've opened is a Belgian
ale mustard. Yeah, I love a variation of mustard. Okay,
are these. Should I open the other two first? Or
should we talk about this one?

Speaker 4 (37:41):
No, you should open them all real quick.

Speaker 2 (37:43):
Okay, we've got the BELGIANEO yep, and it's a I
truly think that these are fun hickory farms. Yeah, I
truly love mustard. Okay, so what's this one? Is this
another mustard?

Speaker 3 (37:55):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (37:55):
Spicy serracha mustard? Yeah, I've never I've had mustard and
seracha separately, but never together me either, neither of you,
and you never will. And then there's this third one.
I like that tinfoil sound.

Speaker 4 (38:10):
Yeah, what do we got here with this one?

Speaker 2 (38:12):
This one's a honey pineapple mustard tartan hangy fun.

Speaker 4 (38:15):
Yeah, so you've got three types of mustard.

Speaker 2 (38:17):
Fantastic? And was this I assume this game is a
little set.

Speaker 4 (38:20):
I have no fucking idea how I have THO.

Speaker 2 (38:22):
When did these expire? That's a good thing, right question? Okay,
so fully explore boy?

Speaker 4 (38:28):
Yeah it's ah, yeah, these are.

Speaker 2 (38:30):
A few months. There's a lie of twenty four Okay.
I feel like mustard is one of those things that
can probably go longer. I've been reading a lot recently
about how expiration dates are kind of a fraud. Kind
of a scam, absolutely most of them. It's just like
it might not taste as good.

Speaker 3 (38:45):
That's a big mustard right there, just trying.

Speaker 2 (38:46):
They just wanted to buy more bottles of mustard. That's
Hickory Farms wanting you to get back to the mall.

Speaker 4 (38:50):
Yeah, no idea, how I have these or why I
have them?

Speaker 3 (38:54):
Wayne?

Speaker 4 (38:55):
I got them?

Speaker 2 (38:56):
Uh so they've just been Were they just in your
cupboard or something?

Speaker 3 (38:59):
Yep?

Speaker 2 (39:00):
Do you do a lot of cooking at home? Yeah, okay, so.

Speaker 3 (39:02):
These but mustard. I'm not a mustard.

Speaker 2 (39:05):
I don't like mustard.

Speaker 4 (39:06):
I don't dislike it, but I'm not a mustard front.

Speaker 2 (39:09):
Mustard's an interesting thing to have a home, I would say,
because it's like something you put on like hot dogs,
and you're not unless you're cooking a ton of hot
dogs at home. How often are you?

Speaker 4 (39:18):
I know, what's this type of mustard on my hot dog?

Speaker 2 (39:20):
No? You don't want to spicy serracha, right, Let's just
be honest. That seems like a bad concept because I
would put serracha on a lot of things. I would
put mustard on hot dogs. I don't make hot dogs
at home, So now I just have a thing that
I would kind of almost want to use, right, what
would you put.

Speaker 3 (39:38):
I think these would be great for like a deli
sandwich you know you're making?

Speaker 2 (39:41):
Oh yeah, do you have you?

Speaker 3 (39:45):
I do this sometimes around like I'm gonna save money
and I'm going to make sandwiches at home, and I
spend fucking eighty dollars on all the sandwich stuff.

Speaker 2 (39:53):
Yes, I should have just the trap I fall.

Speaker 3 (39:55):
Yeah, should just bought a fucking sandwich, Yes.

Speaker 2 (39:56):
I could have. But let's see, well, probably four sandwiches.

Speaker 3 (40:00):
A really good one. Now I have white bread.

Speaker 2 (40:03):
Yeah, I have started. I've finally broken the cycle. At
least every three weeks I go to Costco and get
a chicken. Oh wow, and then I use that for
sandwiches throughout the week.

Speaker 3 (40:12):
That's great.

Speaker 2 (40:12):
But then the rest of the time I don't make
anything at home. But this, at least one of these
mustards could go on that chicken. Absolutely probably, I would
probably say probably the most normal on this Belgian Ah,
that probably tastes like mustard the most, right.

Speaker 3 (40:26):
I don't know what you would put honey pineapple mustard.

Speaker 2 (40:28):
On again, probably maybe a spicy sausage.

Speaker 4 (40:31):
Yeah, Oh, that's good.

Speaker 2 (40:33):
Yeah, but it is. Again. I'm not making sausage at
home ever, but now I might have a little excuse
to go crazy.

Speaker 4 (40:41):
You can off on somebody else's podcast.

Speaker 2 (40:43):
Might put these in the back of a cupboard, Yeah,
and just let them rot and then show up again.
Do you ever go to Worstcuca Downtown?

Speaker 3 (40:52):
I have, but I have not in a long time.

Speaker 2 (40:55):
Incredible mustard selection there. I'm going crazy. I mean I
ordered one sausage, but I use probably all seven mustards
throughout the meal.

Speaker 3 (41:03):
So there's a new German beer garden in Echo Park.

Speaker 2 (41:07):
Oh what's it called.

Speaker 3 (41:08):
It's called like bomb me or like it's it's Vietnamese, Oh,
Vietnamese meats. But it's also called Sunset beer Garden.

Speaker 2 (41:16):
Okay, it's two different names.

Speaker 3 (41:18):
Yeah, I call it Sonset beer Garden because I don't
know Vietnamese. But it's right, and it's harder for me
to memorize, sure, a new Vietnamese word versus beer garden,
which is what it is. But they have sausages there
and only one mustard, and I'm like, I guess that's
what I want. I like this.

Speaker 2 (41:36):
What kind of mustard do they have there?

Speaker 3 (41:38):
Like a fucking German mustard.

Speaker 2 (41:40):
I don't know German mustard. This feels like a confused
concept to me so far. Oh I need to go there.
Do they have other Vietnamese food? Yeah, it's good, dude,
I love a good bond me no bomb me though,
what Vietnamese food?

Speaker 3 (41:52):
Do they have fish? Fish sausages? Okay, that's good, that
might be it. Then they have a lot of other
German stuff?

Speaker 2 (42:03):
Does a fish sausage? My theory with sausages you can
put literally anything into and it's gonna taste almost the
same every time.

Speaker 3 (42:10):
Yeah, that's I have no problem eating like a vegan hot.

Speaker 2 (42:13):
Dog right exact because it's a perfect vegan food.

Speaker 3 (42:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (42:16):
I'm like the other one is weird too.

Speaker 2 (42:18):
Yeah, that's just a bunch of gross stuff mashed into
a thing.

Speaker 3 (42:21):
Tim Robinson was talking about maybe like he loves he's
a vegetarian, he loves vegetarian dogs. You're like maybe gonna
like open up place or something like that. That's a
great I was like, you should put up the ingredients
to a real hot dog next to Oh.

Speaker 2 (42:36):
Yeah, we'll get the vegetarian one every time exactly.

Speaker 3 (42:39):
Just be like, here's what's in a real hot dog.
And then this one is pretty good.

Speaker 4 (42:43):
Tastes just the same.

Speaker 2 (42:45):
They taste like the spices or the salt. Yeah, I
just need spice and salt. Yeah, I and I never
order a vegetarian one, and I'm always worried about my cholesterol.
What what am I doing? I got to get into it.
So what are you putting on your when you do
get a hot dog or a sausage?

Speaker 4 (43:00):
I love hot dogs, you know.

Speaker 3 (43:01):
Anytime I'm in a place as a hot dog, I
gotta try it. How do you feel about hot dogs?

Speaker 2 (43:04):
I like hot dogs, you know, not at home, but
I'll go to what's that place called doghouse?

Speaker 3 (43:12):
Oh yeah, I used to work next to one of those,
and I had to stop going because they're so unhealthy.

Speaker 2 (43:16):
Yeah, it's unbelievably bad for you. Yeah, but I like
a corn dog there even. Oh wow, how often you're
just going as an adult to a restaurant and ordering
a corn dog?

Speaker 4 (43:25):
Yeah that's a good idea.

Speaker 2 (43:27):
Delicious, dipping it in some mustard, eating some tatar tots.

Speaker 3 (43:30):
Yeah, those tots are fucking fantastic. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (43:33):
I never drink root beer, but that's the one place
I'm tempted. But I'm like this makes kind of sense.

Speaker 4 (43:37):
Oh yeah, if you're gonna go all in jump in.

Speaker 2 (43:39):
Yeah, give me that candy drink. So like, I love
a Chicago dog, Oh sure, vegetable love.

Speaker 3 (43:44):
I love a steamed bun.

Speaker 2 (43:46):
Oh, I don't know that I've ever had a steam bun.
That sounds a little wet.

Speaker 3 (43:50):
Oh no, it's great. It's anytime you have a hard bun.
I'm like, what are we doing?

Speaker 2 (43:56):
Is it damp?

Speaker 3 (43:58):
Not just feels good? You never had a fucking steam button.

Speaker 2 (44:01):
Maybe I was tricked, or maybe I'll probably just was.

Speaker 4 (44:04):
I'm just like really aware when you have like a
a hard bottom, like this is fucking dry.

Speaker 3 (44:10):
This is ship.

Speaker 2 (44:12):
Kind of packing material text. Sure, yeah, maybe I've had
a lot of steam buns, but you're not aware of it. Yeah. Interesting, Yeah,
Chicago dog. I just love a plane hot dog with
a little mustard dog ketchup. I'm not crazy about a ketchup.
It's too sweet on a hot dog. I only like
a French fry and a ketchup.

Speaker 3 (44:30):
Yes, I agree with you so much. I got an
argument with my girlfriend because she made like veggie nuggets
like an air fryer and was dibbing them in ketchup
and well, what are you three?

Speaker 2 (44:39):
That's child behare Yes, that's what I said.

Speaker 3 (44:41):
I said, this is child behavior.

Speaker 2 (44:42):
And she was like.

Speaker 3 (44:43):
I was like, you needed like a sweet and sour,
you had to create some but just a straight up
chicken nugget and a ketchup.

Speaker 2 (44:50):
That's like at the cafeteria elementary school and you don't
know how to work. That's okay, you're drinking chocolate. Well,
I hope you convinced her otherwise that her taste is wrong.
I know.

Speaker 3 (45:04):
I mean, like you have a fine palette.

Speaker 2 (45:07):
Yeah, chicken nugget has to go in a barbecue sauce ranch.
People doing it in honey. I don't know what I
can do honey mustard, honey mustard. See, but it's a
little bit. There's a little bit of everything.

Speaker 3 (45:18):
Well the chicken tender, dude, dream chicken tender situation. Here
you dip it in the ranch and then you also
have buffalo sauce and then you double Are you kidding me?

Speaker 2 (45:27):
That's my ultimate thing?

Speaker 3 (45:28):
That's good.

Speaker 2 (45:29):
Where are you getting a chicken tender in la? I
don't know.

Speaker 3 (45:32):
I don't think I've ever had one here?

Speaker 2 (45:34):
Have you been to Hell and rays?

Speaker 1 (45:36):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (45:36):
Yes, yeah, unbelievable, very good, the best I think the
best chicken tender in the world. Maybe really okay, I
mean as far as I'm concerned. And their employees are
so sweet there, it's almost it's starting to feel like
a religion or something. These people really love being here
and there. It feels like they're trying to draw me
into something that I'm not aware of yet, but I

(45:57):
adore it. Love.

Speaker 3 (45:58):
And I just moved to Echo Park and there's a
brand new Buffalo Wild Wings, like really too close to me.
And since it's brand new, they're treating it nice.

Speaker 2 (46:06):
They still care for the next three months.

Speaker 3 (46:08):
Yes, so because you go to a Buffalo Wild Wings
where they gave up, that's bad. Oh it could not.
It's really bad. But I do like this new Buffalo
Wild Wings. I love Asian zing and some ranch.

Speaker 2 (46:22):
Oh, that's one's nice. What is the Asian zing.

Speaker 3 (46:24):
It's like a zip.

Speaker 2 (46:26):
That seems like it's a sweet, sour, borderline problematic sauce
that's probably gonna get changed. That feels like, uh, like
with Chinese chicken salad. Everyone's like, oh, yeah, that was
invented by a white lady at some point.

Speaker 3 (46:38):
And yeah, do you know the real story of cashew chicken,
like how that was So it's invented in Springfield, Missouri,
and it was a Chinese immigrant came Torfield, Missouri. Yes,
and they were making real Chinese food and everyone there
was like, now, no, of course, okay, well just dump
gravy on this ship. What we'll call it cash your Chicken. Yeah,

(47:02):
the story of cash your Chicken. And then with this
immigrant was fucking rolling after this. It's a story of
how America broke a person.

Speaker 2 (47:09):
By saying and created a dish.

Speaker 3 (47:11):
Yeah exactly.

Speaker 2 (47:13):
I love a cashew chicken.

Speaker 3 (47:14):
Who does it?

Speaker 2 (47:15):
But I think it's because I love a cashew Oh okay,
I think casho is my number two nut?

Speaker 4 (47:19):
Really think?

Speaker 2 (47:20):
Well, actually I talk about this non stuff on this podcast.
Brazil nut is my health nut. I eat that for
a health purpose. Yep, almond cashew. I love a pistache sashio.
I would say number three.

Speaker 3 (47:32):
I like pistachios because you got a governor on it.
You can't ye crush it. Yeah, you gotta get slowed.

Speaker 2 (47:39):
Down a little bit, yes, some self control.

Speaker 3 (47:40):
I have become addicted to pistachios because I equate it
with disc golfing. Whenever I disc golf I'm rocking pistachios.

Speaker 2 (47:47):
Wow, that seems like a difficult thing for disc It
feels like you want to just have access to the
nuts during disc golfing.

Speaker 3 (47:52):
Look, I'm having I just I like that I can
just throw the fucking.

Speaker 2 (47:56):
Oh sure, throwing them everywhere willy nilly.

Speaker 3 (47:59):
And I would disc golfing without pistachios. Uh recently, and
I was like.

Speaker 2 (48:04):
Ruined your week this socks. Where do you do disc golfing?

Speaker 3 (48:07):
Pastina?

Speaker 2 (48:08):
Okay?

Speaker 3 (48:09):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (48:09):
And so you just have a bag of pistasios with you.
Oh that sounds lovely. It's great disc golfing, are you?
Is there like a course?

Speaker 3 (48:17):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (48:18):
How big is that? I mean? Is it nine times
the size of a regular golf course? It seems like
it must be much larger a.

Speaker 3 (48:23):
Regular golf course, really big, very big, smaller than a
regular there's probably the longest distance, probably two hundred yards
or something.

Speaker 2 (48:31):
Okay, And is it themed like a mini golf course?

Speaker 3 (48:34):
No, The theme is you're kind of going in and
out of other people's games, like of like baseball games, soccer.
You're kind of being like, yeah, you're kind of in
the local in a fair way.

Speaker 2 (48:47):
I bet I could get into that.

Speaker 3 (48:48):
It's so fun. Surprisingly, Los Angeles doesn't have many courses
and they're not that good like Iowa when I was
in high school, like had really cool, great disc golf course.

Speaker 4 (49:00):
So that's where I got into it.

Speaker 2 (49:01):
Does it get competitive, Well yeah, but not with me.
You're just I'm there enjoying yourself.

Speaker 3 (49:07):
Having a good time. But yeah, no, there's like it's
fucking huge. It's like an industry and there's like, you know,
disc golf World Championships and shit.

Speaker 2 (49:14):
Really yeah, and yeah, I guess it's like regular golf.
You're just on your own. There aren't teams, right, wow,
see that that I need some I don't want to
have that much accountability during a game. I needed other
people to like cover up how bad I'm doing.

Speaker 3 (49:27):
Right, Well, it's just you just walk and throw a
frisbee and you're just hanging out with your friends eating pistachios. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (49:32):
I don't know that I could even successfully throw a frisbee.

Speaker 3 (49:34):
Yeah, that's gonna be tough.

Speaker 2 (49:35):
Take a minute. Yeah, have you ever thrown a boomerang? Oh?

Speaker 3 (49:38):
Yeah you have, of course.

Speaker 2 (49:40):
Does it actually come back to you? Yeah, it's crazy
that's scarce me to death.

Speaker 3 (49:45):
Yeah. I remember I got a boomerang and went to
like a field when I was like in eighth grade,
and it was just like gonna, well, you know, when
you're like eighth grade, You're like, I'm gonna learn how
to be the best weirdest guy with this. You know,
did you have when you were.

Speaker 2 (49:56):
Like, yeah, I'm little, see like a weird thing I
saw on TV and now this is going.

Speaker 3 (49:59):
To be the boomerang?

Speaker 2 (50:01):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (50:01):
Of course. Did you have a thing that you had
obsessed with that you were trying to be the best at.
I try to be the best yo yo er in
my school.

Speaker 2 (50:06):
Oh yo yo. I watched a lot of friends become
good at yo yo. I don't think I was ever
I ever bought one. We would have the yo yo
guy come through his tours. Did he do that for you? No?
You have the touring yo yo man? No?

Speaker 3 (50:19):
I mean, but I loved like the Smothers brothers and
they would do all the fucking yoyo. Have you ever
seen you know, Mark prosch Oh?

Speaker 4 (50:25):
Yeah, I love Mark motherfucker in the world. Uh do
you ever see his yoyo guy that he.

Speaker 3 (50:30):
Used to do.

Speaker 2 (50:31):
It's like the last thing that like you could do
before everyone knew what online videos were.

Speaker 3 (50:37):
He's so funny, it's so good. Look up Mark prochs. Well,
he's he goes as Kenny strosstras the yo Yo Yoyo Master,
and basically he goes on early morning radio early morning
TV like TV and talks about how his life is going,
like he's supposed to show yoos, but then he just
talks about his dad used to hit him.

Speaker 2 (50:57):
It's so good. Yeah, yeah, I don't think he anyone
could get away with that at this point.

Speaker 3 (51:01):
No, it's so good. Yeah, it's like, well he was
like a small Wisconsin markets and stuff, but fuck, he
fooled so many people, so many people. Yeah, they're my
favorite thing. One time it's like, so are you headed tomorrow?
He just makes it left turn. He goes, this is
the last day you will see me and himsday. I'm
sure he's like, we have decided part ways. Am I angry? Yes,
it's just the.

Speaker 2 (51:22):
Funniest thing, one of the funniest. Did you ever see
a pilot that he made, Oh, good morning triay, Yes,
where he gets hit by Is that not just on
the internet At this point, people they see that.

Speaker 3 (51:31):
They put it up for like they do you for
a few weeks in the commissation was like, no, you
don't have the rights, take that down.

Speaker 2 (51:36):
Oh, give me a break, Give me a break. That's
the funniest the fact that, I mean, i the one
comfort I take from that show is I'm like, it
was so good and that didn't get made. Yeah, there's
no justice in the entertainment business.

Speaker 3 (51:49):
Because yes, the thesis for this show was they would
hire a real person who would be their first day
covering the news, and they'd be surrounded by by people
just doing bits. It's so when he walks he gets
hit by a car outside and he walks back in
in the middle of I just got hit by a
fucking car. I like, that's like the hardest I've laughed
at the TV shows.

Speaker 2 (52:09):
Oh it's so good. Yeah, I've like in writers rooms,
I've watched that before because everyone just loves it. It
makes you feel so funny. Somebody's gotta So now we've
got to get the Cave show back on the market
and good morning Trice ight, and then everything will be solved. Ye,
well should maybe we should try. I mean, I'm willing
to try. These expired mustards you open yours. They don't

(52:30):
even have like a safety sealon. Mine had one, Oh
it did?

Speaker 3 (52:35):
Boy?

Speaker 2 (52:35):
Mine simply did not. Wow, So this could end. I'm
trying the spicy siracha.

Speaker 3 (52:44):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 2 (52:45):
Not in love with I mean at least it's not
great on a finger. Say that, and it is months expired. Okay,
and now let's try the Belgian ale.

Speaker 3 (52:55):
This is the new wuhan.

Speaker 2 (52:57):
Yeah, we're about to start something very bad. Were opening
a door that should not be opened.

Speaker 3 (53:01):
Dip it in some pangolin.

Speaker 2 (53:04):
I've had pangolin? What when I was on a Mormon
mission a long time ago which ended poorly. I was
in Malaysia and some of the people that we were
like trying to convert or whatever had run over one.
And okay, like while eating it, they like told us
this is what you're eating. And I didn't even know

(53:25):
what the animal was at that point, Yeah, because like
they look kind of like armadillos.

Speaker 3 (53:30):
Yeah, like a skunky armadillo.

Speaker 2 (53:31):
Yes, But I was just full on. I was like,
what is this weird texture on this thing?

Speaker 3 (53:36):
It was a pengolin, just I just found I was
on I was at my grandparents farm in Missouri like
a year ago, and I went on a jog and
I saw somebody'd run over an armadillo, and I was like,
Missouri has armadillos?

Speaker 2 (53:49):
Where what are those name? I guess Arizona's where I
would assume.

Speaker 4 (53:52):
Texas, I think. But yeah, I was like, this is
far Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (53:56):
What a weird creature. They don't seem like they belong anywhere,
lost and they roll up to protect themselves.

Speaker 3 (54:03):
Yeah, but they want to be balls. Yeah, they want
to you where it was like an animal that would
be like it would be like a soccer ball, but
then you could turn it inside out and it was
a popple.

Speaker 2 (54:13):
That sounds very familiar to me. That sounds really satisfying.

Speaker 3 (54:17):
Actually, I used to have a really shitty joke about it,
about just being like you used to tell my pop,
will be yourself.

Speaker 2 (54:22):
You're not a baseball not a horrible joke.

Speaker 3 (54:24):
Could find joke for a nineteen year old?

Speaker 2 (54:26):
Yeah, I find joke. Were a very select group of people.

Speaker 3 (54:28):
No, but I'm saying I was nineteen. I've didn't have
a lot of life experience.

Speaker 2 (54:32):
Yeah, you were just like, what have I seen or tried?

Speaker 3 (54:36):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (54:38):
Well, okay, so I've tried two of the mustards. Neither
of them put maybe once put on a food and
if they weren't, excuse bad. They don't taste good. These
are bad, But I can put them in my closet.
I do. I have developed a thing since the pandemic
of like, well, I should just leave it in case

(54:58):
the grocery store shut down. Right, maybe I will need mustard. Yeah,
maybe the water wars will begin a little bit sooner
than we think. Oh, those water wars, they're coming for us.

Speaker 3 (55:07):
Because he's bad.

Speaker 2 (55:08):
I've got twelve bottles of water under my bed and
that's not going to last me very long.

Speaker 3 (55:12):
But I was watching Succession like on a plane just
I was like, oh, let's just throw on the first
episode of Succession, because like I've seen every fucking movie
on Delta right now. And in the pilot, the Connor
is he's like he's all about how he has land
over water, and I'm like, oh, he is really good, right, Yeah,

(55:34):
this is very developed.

Speaker 2 (55:36):
Character for a pilots totally.

Speaker 4 (55:38):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (55:38):
That show I put off for like, uh maybe the
first month. I remember being like, I don't want to
watch a show about rich people. This seems like it's
going to be, so it's just going to be lecturing me.
And then I watched three minutes of Pilot and I
was obsessed with the show for cool.

Speaker 3 (55:54):
Also, I was talking the other day with somebody who
was like, what is the best comedy, like, because comedies
are fucking gone, oh good bye. And then we decided
like Succession was probably the best comedy of the last
six years.

Speaker 2 (56:06):
Yeah, easily.

Speaker 3 (56:07):
When they call themselves the Disgusting Brothers, I'm like, that's
the funniest thing I've ever heard.

Speaker 2 (56:12):
Cards Well, it's written by a comedy person.

Speaker 3 (56:15):
Yeah, White Lotus is really really funny too.

Speaker 2 (56:17):
Though White Lotus is very funny, I like somebody somewhere,
But it's a hard time to find a good comedy
right this point.

Speaker 3 (56:23):
I think, how the end of White Lotus first season,
how I'm not giving a way a person dies, that's
the opening shot of this but how that person dies
is the funniest thing I've ever.

Speaker 2 (56:35):
Wait, remind me who dies? And listener again, it's too late,
you're gonna find out.

Speaker 3 (56:41):
The Murray dude, Oh right, of course, he like truly
the funniest downfall of any fucking character in the history
of television. He relaxed. I was.

Speaker 2 (56:54):
I was laughing hard.

Speaker 3 (56:56):
Thinking about how somebody had to call his family and
be like, all right, so here's a couple of things. Murried,
he relapsed, He made a kid gay for drugs, then
got mad because he was wrong at a at a
fucking guest broke into the room, took a shit on

(57:18):
their clothes, and then was caught and accidentally stabbed because
he had broken into a place.

Speaker 2 (57:24):
So good, so that's how he died. Yeah, I feel
like if I had to be that person, I would
just make up a lie about that person's death. I'd
be like, unfortunately he passed out, Oh my godbody got
to him and we don't know what else happened in
the situation, and.

Speaker 3 (57:37):
Shit in someone's luggage because he was wrong and on drugs.

Speaker 2 (57:42):
I think, just like a really small genius thing about
that show is the word pineapple sweet is the most
annoying thing you could possibly say repeatedly. It's just like
anyone who cares about pineapple sweet is the most irritating
personal life. Man that shows great, and then the death
of the end of the second one is so good. Yeah,
just strips off, Oh tips off, you got this? So

(58:05):
she is a genius. I hope that we use Jennifer
Coolidge as much as we possibly can. She's such a treasure.

Speaker 1 (58:14):
I mean.

Speaker 3 (58:16):
Truly crushing it for thirty years.

Speaker 2 (58:19):
Now, at least thirty years. Yeah, and it's finally like
getting exactly what the attention she deserves. Right, she's been successful,
but like finally she's like a household name. Yeah, she's
long overdue. Well, I've got these disgusting mustards. God knows
what I'll do with them, but we'll see what happens.

Speaker 4 (58:38):
Throw them away.

Speaker 2 (58:39):
I'm not throwing them away. I don't think i've I
think I've thrown away one thing from this podcast.

Speaker 4 (58:45):
I didn't think they were expired, and I thought they
would be good.

Speaker 2 (58:48):
I think this is not the first expired food that's
been brought to this podcast. So you're not alone. And
I'll probably give them to away at a live show
or something. Someone else will get the cursed. We'll pass
them down through centuries. I think it's time for a game. Okay,
we're gonna play a game called Gift or a Curse.
I need a number between one and ten from you.

Speaker 1 (59:06):
Eight.

Speaker 2 (59:07):
Okay, I have to do a little bit of light
calculating to get our game piece. Okay, you can promote,
to recommend, do whatever you want.

Speaker 4 (59:13):
Oh yeah, watch my special Alive in Alaska just came out.

Speaker 3 (59:17):
It's on YouTube. I went to Alaska and shot a
special and yeah, it's really good. And if you're interested
in stand up comedy in Alaska, this.

Speaker 4 (59:28):
Is right up your alley.

Speaker 3 (59:30):
And that's it for my promotion.

Speaker 4 (59:32):
And now you're doing some calculations.

Speaker 3 (59:34):
No, it's okay.

Speaker 4 (59:35):
I gotta go to CarMax after.

Speaker 3 (59:37):
Also, if you can't, if you can't watch Alive in Alaska,
send me how the fuck to get registration before my
new car where I don't have to go to DMV.

Speaker 2 (59:46):
Oh good luck, Yeah, good luck. I we'll get to
this game in a moment. But when I first moved
to LA, you're supposed to like register your car within
the first like nine days or something, and I didn't.
I then lived with fear for five years. I did
not go back. I did not go to the DMV.
I kept my Utah driver's license. I would go back
to Utah every other year just because I I don't

(01:00:07):
know what I thought was going to happen. Right, It's
like you're busting and get me.

Speaker 3 (01:00:12):
The DMV here does suck.

Speaker 2 (01:00:13):
It's a bad experience. I would rather everywhere else.

Speaker 3 (01:00:16):
Sure, I'd rather go to like Heavenly truly, if I
had an option to go back to Iowa and just
keep my Ayowa like, yeah, that's it's easier for me
to fly to Iowa to deal with that DMV than
to go to fucking East Hollywood.

Speaker 2 (01:00:28):
I think there is one easy one. I wish I
could remember which one is good. I feel like there's
one that people are like that one's not as bad.

Speaker 3 (01:00:34):
I used to go to the Passi dino on.

Speaker 2 (01:00:38):
I don't know. You feel like there's a valleyish one
that's not quite as crazy.

Speaker 3 (01:00:41):
We'll go to Great La. People will go to great
lengths to find a decent DMVs.

Speaker 2 (01:00:46):
Driving nine hours, Yeah, and everybody go watch the special.
So you've taped it in Alaska.

Speaker 3 (01:00:51):
Yeah, I went into two week tour of Alaska, shot
everything and then we So that's the kind of the beginning,
and then the end is I have a lot of
jokes about Alaska. At the end, you show it kind of,
I you how I kind of you see where those
jokes came from.

Speaker 2 (01:01:02):
Oh that's amazing, what a great concept. I wish you
could run into Linda Well's.

Speaker 4 (01:01:09):
I'm just saying, like when you're like, yes, she had
this online presence of this.

Speaker 2 (01:01:12):
What was her name, lusty Lady Linda.

Speaker 3 (01:01:15):
Yeah, that's literally every fucking person in Alaska as a
secret person on the inside.

Speaker 2 (01:01:19):
That's true. They're running from something. Oh, they're running something.

Speaker 3 (01:01:22):
Yeah, my joke was that it's a fine joke, but true.
It's just like everyone in Alaska's like I like, like,
came up to visit, been here eighty nine years. Like,
I'm like they I just love And also I can't
be in Virginia. If I go near Virginia, I'm getting nabbed.
I have got warrants.

Speaker 2 (01:01:41):
Alaska everyone's a Linda. Yeah, Okay, this is how we
play Gift or a Curse. I'm gonna name three things.
You're gonna tell me if there're a gift or a
curse and why, and then I'll tell you if you're
right or wrong, because there are correct answers, right, all right?
This was someone's from a listener named Mark. Gift to
a curse vow renewals.

Speaker 3 (01:01:58):
Uh fuck, I'm not married, haven't been married. I think
that that would be if you're at a place where
you have to do that, probably a curse, you know
what I mean, somebody has If your partner has to
be like, tell me why you love me again in
front of everyone, that's not a good Things aren't going great, right.

Speaker 4 (01:02:19):
Vow Renels should just be kind of how you behave.

Speaker 2 (01:02:22):
All the time, right, right, So you're saying curse.

Speaker 4 (01:02:25):
Yeah, you don't want to be put in that situation.

Speaker 2 (01:02:27):
Wrong, Okay, it's a gift and kind of for the
same reasons. I love the idea of being invited to
one of these things and we all get to kind
of just theorize about what went wrong between Mark and
Linda that led them to this place where suddenly we're
having another wedding yep, and we're like, and I feel
like it's probably gonna last another two years. This is
a real life.

Speaker 3 (01:02:47):
I can't imagine a thinking people would want to come
see me get married once, let alone not even a
real one the second time.

Speaker 2 (01:02:55):
First of all, I think you should if you want
people to you should have to get divorced and then
remarried to the same person if you're going to drag
me to one of these things, right, Yes, But I
love the idea. I love Bower Noules at Disney World.
Something's gone super wrong.

Speaker 3 (01:03:09):
I remember a girl I was dating who I lived
with for a while. We were at Universal Studios. We're
taking like her little brother who was just awful.

Speaker 2 (01:03:19):
I hate him.

Speaker 4 (01:03:20):
Yeah, he like got hammered and like threw up everywhere.

Speaker 3 (01:03:23):
And then he was like sixteen, like the night before
we went to Universal Studios, and then at Universal Studios
he's like, hey, man, will you buy me some beer.
I'm like, get the fuck out of here. If you
were cool, yeah, but you're not. You're a mena, You're
a menace. But we saw these people there at like
getting and it was these it's clearly newly married couple
and said like king and Queen like on their shirts,

(01:03:43):
and they were getting a photo like very excited with
Bumblebee the fucking transferable boy. My girlfriend goes, god, I
wish it was that fucking dumb and maybe love her.
You know. She was like, I wish that brought me joy,
to be that fucking simple.

Speaker 2 (01:03:58):
I want to bottom yees to that marriage.

Speaker 3 (01:04:00):
I think Bubbe's rad.

Speaker 2 (01:04:03):
I'm getting married and a giant thing of concrete and
theme park characters yeah, to have a theme park, wedding, honeymoon,
the dream. It's something that I can't access. It's just
something that I would be actively miserable at. And some
people it's the greatest joy in the world. And God bless, bless,
God bless. Okay, so you've gotten one wrong so far. Okay.

(01:04:26):
The second one is from a listener named Julia gift
he a curse. The server at a restaurant asking what
dressing you want on a salad without listing what dressings
they have. And I am just gonna say, right now,
I feel like we've talked about dressings and marks on
this podcast already. This is all kind of falling into
gift he a curse.

Speaker 3 (01:04:45):
Well, I don't. I don't know if you can the
amount if we talked about hot dogs and chicken fingers.
I don't order a lot of salads when I'm out. Uh,
And I'm a real basic, like I'm gonna I'm gonna
pick ranch. What am I?

Speaker 2 (01:05:01):
You know?

Speaker 3 (01:05:02):
So this one is tough for me.

Speaker 4 (01:05:03):
I would say, I don't give a ship.

Speaker 3 (01:05:07):
This is not a thing. I would say, this is
not a thing.

Speaker 2 (01:05:10):
You have to answer that is not this is not
a thing.

Speaker 3 (01:05:14):
Nobody. This is not a thing.

Speaker 2 (01:05:15):
You're trying to dodge being wrong here. That's what's happening.

Speaker 3 (01:05:18):
You feel like, I don't give a ship it's a gift.
Then it's a gift, and I don't mean that. I
just I don't have an I don't have a reason
why it's a gift, because this is not a thing.
Somebody not telling you.

Speaker 2 (01:05:29):
Here's the thing. It's the thing for Julia.

Speaker 3 (01:05:30):
Somebody's not telling you what's uh like?

Speaker 2 (01:05:33):
What? Julia says? I want a salad and the server
just walks off. I guess and the salad appears with
dressing on. But oh wait, the server to a restaurant asking,
oh breaking Comprehendension is zero because there's they don't give
you the information.

Speaker 3 (01:05:52):
I think you ask for the information. This is a
quick fix. Julia ask them what what dressings do you have?

Speaker 2 (01:05:59):
It is a I love the little guessing game the
waiters devised here. It's kind of a rumpel Stiltskin type
of thing that's happening. It's like, now you get to
embarrass yourself because if you ask for addressing that they
don't have. Now you've got to keep going and going.
I was it's a power dynamic.

Speaker 3 (01:06:15):
It's fine. I would be like Asian Zing. I went
Asian zing'saus on my fucking lettuce.

Speaker 2 (01:06:20):
And then the waiters off to Buffalo Wild Wings to
get a whole gallon of it.

Speaker 3 (01:06:24):
I appreciate that.

Speaker 2 (01:06:25):
I feel like, uh, you know, I like that the
waiter has the confidence in me that they think that
I'll be able to name addressing they have. Yeah. I
think it's a gift. Okay, so you've gotten one right, So.

Speaker 4 (01:06:36):
Yes, good.

Speaker 2 (01:06:37):
Finally, this is from a listener named CALLI gift. He
a curse calling your partner the boss.

Speaker 3 (01:06:44):
That's that's fine, let's gift. I like that. What's up, Boss?
I'm man? Great?

Speaker 4 (01:06:50):
Yeah, and possibly you're married.

Speaker 3 (01:06:52):
To Bruce Springsteen.

Speaker 2 (01:06:53):
Oh it's a pretty good point.

Speaker 3 (01:06:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:06:55):
Interesting, I wonder if his wife calls him the boss?
Is he married? Oh?

Speaker 3 (01:06:59):
Yeah, which is the boss?

Speaker 2 (01:07:02):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (01:07:03):
I had I had a shitty pitch for SNL sketch
where it was undercover Boss. But it's just Bruce Springsteen
with a mustache and he's trying to like.

Speaker 2 (01:07:14):
He's going after the East East Street band.

Speaker 3 (01:07:16):
Well, he was just like helping the crew load up,
and he's like you, what do you guys think about
Springsteen to come on, man.

Speaker 2 (01:07:22):
That's not a bad idea.

Speaker 3 (01:07:23):
No, it's just a fun it's a fake idea.

Speaker 2 (01:07:26):
Yeah, it's like where does this go?

Speaker 4 (01:07:28):
Yeah, that's a that's a pitch meeting sketch idea.

Speaker 2 (01:07:30):
Yeah, that's like last minute thing. It's it sounds like
an idea.

Speaker 3 (01:07:34):
It's just the worst. No, it's not a sketch.

Speaker 2 (01:07:37):
Moving off. Yeah, uh yeah, absolutely a gift. Yeah, your
partner is the boss. Maybe you're in a relationship with
your employer. I support that. Yeah, more people should be
in a relationship with their boss. I feel like that's
a healthy dynamic. Absolutely, meeting the boss at the workplace,
mauling head over heel. Yes, go for it.

Speaker 3 (01:07:58):
Yeah, you're getting uh mote it because sexual favors are
being exchange.

Speaker 2 (01:08:02):
This is a healthy thing to do. Absolutely healthy calling
your versu in the boss in front of your other employee,
other coworkers. Everybody loves it. Everybody thinks this is normal.
Go for it, Linda, I think. I mean, it's a gift.
No matter which way you cut it, that's very fun.
You've got you got two out of three.

Speaker 3 (01:08:22):
I'm mad? Why did I say eight?

Speaker 2 (01:08:24):
Eight? Okay? That's a good question. We get this occasionally
from the guests. I have a at this point, I
might I might need on a least to organize this list.
It's a Google doc that's probably a thousand pages long
with listeners suggests, and I use the number that the
guest gives me to go one, two, three, four, five, six,
seven eight. That's one. Just to keep things fair, to

(01:08:44):
keep things nice and even it sounds like hell for you,
it is hell for me. You know the hell I'm
going Do you pick the three most interesting ones? But
there are so many interesting ones, and you know we will.

Speaker 3 (01:08:56):
Hey, that middle one was not interesting.

Speaker 2 (01:09:00):
It was Julia.

Speaker 4 (01:09:02):
We need to play more than just Julia. I think
about the other one.

Speaker 2 (01:09:06):
It's kind of a Julia centric podcast. Every episode is
dedicated to.

Speaker 4 (01:09:10):
And her non problems.

Speaker 2 (01:09:13):
She's creating all this drama at every restaurant she goes
to just pick range Julia.

Speaker 3 (01:09:18):
You know what I've been I was thinking about this.
We've all thought about this a little bit, and I
was just kind of thinking about it, like, I know,
like just glancingly, because I do have two cars right now,
neither of them are at my house, and I I
just you know, it just scans in your brain a
little bit like, could I is there a way I
could drive both those at the same time? Absolutely, I

(01:09:40):
mean I know you can't, but like it is just
like there's gotta be a fuck way.

Speaker 2 (01:09:43):
Like there's a machine. There's some sort of gadget that
you could do that with.

Speaker 4 (01:09:46):
I was talking with about it.

Speaker 3 (01:09:48):
You could turn one of the cars, put it in reverse,
so then you at least have both steering wheels.

Speaker 2 (01:09:53):
Are access to one next then yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:09:57):
Your feet are in both one foot in each car.
I don't think I'm going to try it, but but
it's idea really help me because currently and just just
pure hell up here in this brain with this car.

Speaker 2 (01:10:13):
I don't think you're overthinking it. You just need like
a long stick that you can kind of push pedals
with a grabble.

Speaker 3 (01:10:20):
One is going to be tricky.

Speaker 2 (01:10:22):
It's I mean, the one ten's tricky. No, that's what
you know. So I could stain your who cares? Why
not just go for it? Two cars flying down the
one ten one driver people would appreciate.

Speaker 3 (01:10:33):
That's what's rattling around in my brain. That's an actual problem.
Linda Julie, I.

Speaker 2 (01:10:43):
Do have one for what is it, like, Okay, now
we both have to answer on a lease. Gift a curse?

Speaker 3 (01:10:48):
I bet it's a real one.

Speaker 6 (01:10:49):
Well, this one comes out on this episode comes out
on January second, So I figured I would ask gift
a curse New Year's Eve coverage.

Speaker 2 (01:10:57):
Oh, coverage like a rock and New Year's Eve, etcetera.

Speaker 3 (01:11:01):
Absolute gift. People are fucking smashed on that thing. People
are wasted. It's great.

Speaker 2 (01:11:09):
You see like.

Speaker 3 (01:11:11):
Like, uh, who's the Andy Cohen like blacked out? It's
really fun.

Speaker 2 (01:11:17):
So drunk.

Speaker 3 (01:11:18):
Yeah, so unforfeud.

Speaker 2 (01:11:19):
I think that.

Speaker 3 (01:11:20):
I think like two years ago they went fucking they
went hard, and then like it was like it was
one of these years where they clearly there was a
mandate where they had to be like we're not drinking
this year, like we're all this is not a thing where.

Speaker 2 (01:11:33):
I think Don Lemon went too far with the drinking.
I remember being like, Oh, this person's career is crazy,
what's happening. Yeah, this man is actively like he would
be drunk privately, it would be a bad situation, and
he's like on television. Yeah, yeah, I agree. A gift
getting to see all of that and then you get
to like They'll have these bands that no one has

(01:11:53):
ever heard of in a million years, and they're playing
in some weird studio in Burbank. It's the time of
their life. And you get to witness things that you're like,
no one's heard the song before, and somehow they've weaseled
their way into this coverage. I love it. It gives
you a new look into the world and you don't
usually see. That's fun and you don't have to go
to Times Square, which I mean, I mean, what are

(01:12:14):
you doing? What went wrong? What? What drives anyone to do?
This is awful. It's just an obviously bad thing to do.

Speaker 4 (01:12:23):
Have you ever been hammered on TV?

Speaker 2 (01:12:25):
No, I should be every day.

Speaker 3 (01:12:27):
I was hammered one timel on Act well, but to
be fair, it wasn't on purpose. I was blanked out
of the show. It wasn't in any sketches.

Speaker 2 (01:12:39):
Okay, this is a bad week.

Speaker 3 (01:12:42):
You know, you're not even in not in one dress rehearsal.

Speaker 2 (01:12:45):
That's that.

Speaker 3 (01:12:47):
And I still got to be there.

Speaker 2 (01:12:48):
It's not a fair work.

Speaker 3 (01:12:49):
That's there at noon noon.

Speaker 2 (01:12:52):
Lauren's calling you.

Speaker 3 (01:12:54):
So I get there at noon and I'm fucking miserable.
I'm not having a good time in general, but this
is bad. I started drinking at noon, just in my
fucking dressing room. Dress happens. Don't even watch it. Don't
even watch dress. Oh, I'm trashed. And then in Lauren's

(01:13:14):
office between Dress and Air, I'm I'm not even in
the office. I'm outside fucking around with like Fred Armison.
I'm just like doing bits like Brooks get in the
fucking meeting and I was like what, and they were like,
you're in the sketch, Like I got added into a
fucking sketch.

Speaker 2 (01:13:29):
Oh that's not fair.

Speaker 3 (01:13:30):
Well, it's very fair. It's not the job. But I
didn't know that could happen.

Speaker 2 (01:13:36):
And the things they put, the feeling you have when
you don't think you're gonna be on the show, of
course you're drunk.

Speaker 3 (01:13:40):
I'm so hammered. So then I'm fully for a live show.
The sketch like imploded. It was Melissa McCarthy and like
a wall fell during Like the sketch was all bad. Uh,
And I'm just in the background of it, being like
I shouldn't be on TV right now. I didn't even
I think I had a lot, I know, and I
went to the writers. I was like, you gotta take

(01:14:01):
that line away. I think the only guy away. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:14:05):
I was like, I'm in a bad way.

Speaker 2 (01:14:06):
If I was the writer, I'd be like, no, we're
giving you more.

Speaker 3 (01:14:09):
They were like this could be bad. So I was like,
uh oh uh. After that, I learned a big old lesson.
I was like, I could have got fired today.

Speaker 2 (01:14:18):
Don't be drunk at work.

Speaker 3 (01:14:20):
Even if you think you're not going to have to
work that.

Speaker 2 (01:14:21):
Day, there's a chance you might have.

Speaker 3 (01:14:23):
There's a chance you might have to work.

Speaker 2 (01:14:25):
You have to work. Tell me everybody ever like thrown
up on SNL or anything like that.

Speaker 3 (01:14:29):
No, I actually asked that question. I was like, what's
like the craziest thing that like, like, does anybody like
has it? Anybody ever from the crowd like round up
or anything? You know, it's fucking fifty years.

Speaker 2 (01:14:39):
And no, why not? I mean it's just that makes
me sad about humanity.

Speaker 3 (01:14:45):
My favorite story I have from this I was like,
what happened when Katy Perry got caught lipsyincing?

Speaker 2 (01:14:50):
Oh right, what happened?

Speaker 3 (01:14:52):
So super quiet? And there's these double doors that go
out from the studio to the hallway. Super quiet. Everyone's like,
what the fuck just happened. That's just like eerily quiet.
And then Joe Simpson her dad as a manager.

Speaker 2 (01:15:09):
Oh wait, so you said Katie Perry at actually Simpsons
so sorry, Yeah, let's get great actually actually Simpson, actually Simpson.

Speaker 4 (01:15:17):
What happened when she got hot?

Speaker 3 (01:15:19):
Yes, and Joe Simpson like busted through the double doors
and yelled, well it's all over, and he was fucking
right all over so much.

Speaker 2 (01:15:31):
That's so great.

Speaker 3 (01:15:32):
Yeah, that guy is such a weird though, so funny.

Speaker 2 (01:15:38):
Wow, that's amazing. Yeah, I wish that was recorded. I
know he should have. He should have burst on while
she was doing it. Yeah, I mean Joe Simpson, I'm
sorry he didn't. The guy is so strange and so
fame hungry. Let's get him back on TV.

Speaker 4 (01:15:52):
Absolutely like a reality show.

Speaker 3 (01:15:55):
Part of that.

Speaker 2 (01:15:56):
Yeah, he was always involved. He was always talking about
his daughter's bodies and ways is We're like, what's happening?
And then did he come out? Is he gay? There's
a chance that the situation was really evolving. Okay, but
I could be wrong. It just feels like, right, yeah,
it feels like if you're Jessica Simpson's dad, you probably
are gay. Let's see what's happening here? Anally seems very concerned.

Speaker 6 (01:16:19):
I mean, I guess there might have been rumored.

Speaker 2 (01:16:23):
Is he still alive.

Speaker 3 (01:16:26):
This part?

Speaker 2 (01:16:26):
He doesn't.

Speaker 6 (01:16:27):
He doesn't have a wikiped This is making it very difficult.

Speaker 2 (01:16:30):
He doesn't have a Wikipedia page. What okay, something's gone
probably wrong? Well on a least, were we correct or what?

Speaker 3 (01:16:38):
Of course you were correct.

Speaker 6 (01:16:39):
There's nothing I find more joy in than watching people,
as said before, get hammered on TV.

Speaker 2 (01:16:44):
It's why I love the Golden Globes. It's such a
rare thing to see just getting drunk on Televisionated. Okay,
well we won good for us, and we need to
answer a listener question real quick. This is called I
said no emails, We helpe me answer a question. Yeahs
are begging for answers. People write into I said no
gifts at gmail dot com and this says hello Bridger

(01:17:08):
and the person speaking with Bridger, that's you.

Speaker 3 (01:17:10):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (01:17:11):
I'm a family therapist and I work for a nonprofit
organization with very limited financial resources. Thanks to the greed
of our CEO and other superiors. OH should have named
some names. Because of our funding concerns, we are quite
limited in materials for therapeutic activities to engage with children
and their families. I'm wondering if you and your guest
have any ideas for activities for families to do with

(01:17:34):
me to promote healing without promoting capitalism. Will you help
me do my job and not spend any money with
love anonymous therapist. Wow, I mean the perfect podcast to
come to with this question.

Speaker 3 (01:17:46):
I would say, Yeah, that's free stuff to do with
the families to.

Speaker 2 (01:17:51):
Promote healing without promoting capitalists. Right, I mean, okay, well,
this person has put a lot on our shoulders. No shit, ah,
way of a nation. Go to a park. Uh, get
a ball of yarn and throw it around. I mean,
I guess that costs money. I mean, this is what

(01:18:11):
this is what you do?

Speaker 1 (01:18:12):
You do?

Speaker 2 (01:18:13):
I think what these families need is a common enemy,
which could be this therapist. The therapist gives them chores
to do. Go clean some windows, rake leaves, do community service.
This is the perfect sort of thing with this family.
No matter what's going on with their problems, they'll have
a new problem they can all focus on, which is
this horrible therapist.

Speaker 3 (01:18:32):
Hatred bond.

Speaker 2 (01:18:33):
Yeah, the hatred bond. Let them grow to hate you.
And then you can release them and they'll be totally healed.
I'll say that's good, that's real good. You come an enemy,
you got common enemy. And if the therapist doesn't want
to take that on, they can gossip about the CEO
with these families. Yeah, I feel like talking shit heels.

Speaker 3 (01:18:50):
I also confused on why you are a family therapist,
but somehow a CEO is taking all your resources.

Speaker 4 (01:18:56):
Well, your therapy.

Speaker 2 (01:18:58):
Became the nonprofit. Apparently this is a very corrupt. Interesting
that somebody's lining their pockets at this nonprofit with the
money that should be leading to healing. Why this this
person should be blowing the whistle a little harder. I
think the names should have been named. The organization should
have been named.

Speaker 3 (01:19:16):
Her name should have been named.

Speaker 2 (01:19:17):
Yeah, she should have stood up and said this is
not happening. Even tell cowards.

Speaker 3 (01:19:21):
If you're gonna whistle, blow whistle. This is the worst
type of whistle blowing. You're like, things are happening. You're
not going to tell you where or who I am?

Speaker 2 (01:19:28):
What are you doing this? This is a tease? Yeah,
I mean, I think the first thing this therapist needs
to do is work on themselves. That's what I'll say,
oh there, there, we go find another therapist within the
nonprofit to help you blow the whistle and get rid
of the CEO. There will be a power shift there.

(01:19:50):
Everything will work out and these families will finally get
the attention they need. The I mean, it's so easy.
Why did they even write in? This is the big
question there. This coward is a loser. It won't even
name themselves.

Speaker 3 (01:20:05):
Email and you get called a coward and a loser.

Speaker 2 (01:20:09):
Well write a better email. Yes, this organization needs a
hero and it's not this person. And I hate to
hear it. It's fine. Uh and uh. And that CEO,
I mean the CEO is making a little money.

Speaker 3 (01:20:25):
Who cares.

Speaker 2 (01:20:26):
We've all got to make it.

Speaker 3 (01:20:27):
It's some ceo.

Speaker 4 (01:20:31):
Yeah, nobody's like I love my CEO CEO famously.

Speaker 2 (01:20:36):
Good guys, Well we answered it perfectly. Listener, don't write
back in unless you want to give us your name.
Next time. I've got my new mustards. I've had such
a wonderful time. Thank you so much, thank you for
being here. And throw these in the cupboard and see
what happens. They could grow, Yeah, they could grow. Maybe

(01:20:57):
they could grow.

Speaker 3 (01:20:58):
Have my little maybe I didn't know they were expired,
and I do apologize for that.

Speaker 2 (01:21:02):
Don't apologize for that to me.

Speaker 3 (01:21:04):
I really did feel like, look, I live by myself
right now, and I'm like, I'm not going to use these, Like,
this is no way.

Speaker 2 (01:21:11):
What are you pulling out the pineapple mustard? Ye your head?

Speaker 3 (01:21:13):
I was like, maybe you would like to cook, or
know somebody would like to cook. These are decent items,
but they are expired.

Speaker 2 (01:21:18):
It Actually, I don't think it works in any situation
because I feel like if you bring out the honey pineapple,
people are like always trying to be fancy. This is
kind of sad too. Yeah, there's just no situation where
this actually works.

Speaker 3 (01:21:28):
What Villain gave these to me is what I want
to know.

Speaker 2 (01:21:33):
Well, thank you for being here.

Speaker 3 (01:21:34):
Thank you so much.

Speaker 2 (01:21:34):
This was really really fun and listener, the podcast is over.
There's really nothing left to say to you. I hope
you find something to do with your time today and
we'll just wrap it up here. I love you, goodbye,
I said. No Gifts is an exactly right production. Our

(01:21:56):
senior producer is on Alis Nelson, and our episodes are
beautiful mixed by Ben Toliday. The theme song is by
miracle worker Amy Mann, and we couldn't do it without
our booker, Patrick Cottner. You must follow the show on Instagram.
At I said, no gifts. That's where you're going to
see pictures of all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. And
don't you want to see the gifts? I invit?

Speaker 3 (01:22:18):
Did you hear?

Speaker 2 (01:22:22):
Though?

Speaker 1 (01:22:22):
A man myself perfectly clear? When you're a guest to me,
you gotta come to me empty. And I said, no, guests,
you're our presences. Presence enough and I already had too

(01:22:42):
much stuff, So how do you dare to survey me?

Speaker 6 (01:23:00):
Oh,

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Bridger Winegar

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