May 11, 2026 • 37 mins
This podcast edition of Kenny Webster’s pursuit of happiness features stand-up comedian Tim Mathis. ( @KennethRWebster )
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Jigana government sucks. Suit of Happiness radio is deluxe. Liberty
and Freedom will make you smile. A suit of Habing
and us on your radio. Toyle just as Cheeseburgers and
a liberty rise at the food.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
A pedestrian at the Denver Airport was struck and killed
by a Frontier Airlines plane after jumping over a security fence.
His soul was then whisked away by Spirit Airlines. Oh
that joke offended you, then don't join us This Thursday
night at the Houston Improv for couples therapy. Dustin Simms
(00:40):
is our special guest. He is so funny. If you're
not doing anything this Thursday and you love edgy, right
leaning comedy, it's actually not a political show.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
It's not real political. Everything's a little political, but.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
It's all about couples and dating and sex and single
people are welcome. Bachelorette parties, love to go insuls are
encouraged to attend. We hope you'll be there for that.
That's this Thursday night at the Houston Improv. Come out
for date night. We'll get you out of there in
time for bed. Get there at seven, well, we'll get
you done by nine.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
Don't worry. Hey, uh, who's here?
Speaker 2 (01:12):
This afternoon Tony Ortiz stopping by from Current Revolt dot com.
We are going to talk about all things Texas politics today,
including some strange, bizarre news about special benefits for people
with H one B visas in the state of Texas
should be sound as illegal.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
We'll give you the details.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Also stopping by this afternoon, Tim mathis the stand up
comedian with all the strangest things from Hollywood. Will detail
all of it, but first, let's talk about this last
night on sixty Minutes. We watch it so you don't
have to. Louisiana Governor Jeff Landry walked into that slick
CBS studio like a man who just finished checking his
crab traps and decided to ruin a perfectly good liberal narrative.
(01:55):
The interviewer was a woman named Cecilia Vega, polished as
a marble countertop, hit him with a question.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
She said, what about the elections during wartime?
Speaker 2 (02:06):
They're upset because they suspended a congressional primary so that
they could reconsider the districting lines in the state of Louisiana.
And Landry didn't even blink. You just leaned in with
that thick Cajun drawl and dropped a truth bomb. You
cannot say that we are all created equal and then
allow a law to sort people.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
Based on race. He's right.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Have you guys looked at what the congressional district in
Louisiana looks like? That's so controversial right now? It goes
from Shreveport to Baton Rouge. Baton Rouge is the capital
of Louisiana. Shreveport is basically East Dallas. I got some
pushback when I said that this morning from people that
don't live in Shreveport, and then I got dozens of
(02:49):
messages from people in Sreeport saying, no, Kenny's right. We're
all Dallas cowboys face a very different economy. It's a
very different culture in Shreeport. Why would they have the
same congressional representative as Batners doesn't make any sense. The
national media didn't know what to do with my man,
Jeff Landry. Here's the guy, very sharp man, quoting the
fourteenth Amendment like it's his grocery list, who talks like
(03:12):
he spent the morning eating boot ann and yelling at
a Nutria. Rat Coastal reporters East Coast and West coast
alike kept waiting for the dumb Southerner moment so they
could file their maga governor says something horrifying story.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
It never came.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Instead, they got a calm, lethal logic and zero apology.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
Was he treated fairly please?
Speaker 2 (03:34):
They treated him like a zoo exhibit that somehow learned
constitutional law. The accent through them so hard they spent
half the segment doing that subtle bless his heart head
tilt classic. They can handle Harvard liberals with lisps, but
a conservative who sounds like he's from actual America causes
them all to short circuit.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
But anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself here.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
This circus didn't start yesterday on sixty minutes or in Louisiana,
for years, Democrats have been treating the Voting Rights Act
like a magical racial slot machine. Pull the lever, demand
another snake shaped majority black district, and then scream racism
if anyone complains. So in Louisiana, it was pointed out
(04:20):
that Treeport's connected to Baton Rouge, two cities that have
less in common than Kale and Gumbo, with a district
so ridiculous it looked like it was drawn by a
drunk with a crayon. Enter the Supreme Court six to
three SmackDown. The conservative justices said, enough, the rule of
the map was unconstitutionally gerrymandered. No more forcing states to
(04:43):
play racial bean counter good, no more proportional representation by
skin color or else. That decision was the political equivalent
of turning on the lights in a roach motel. Suddenly
every normal person in America could breathe again. Good Tennessee
(05:06):
acts its lone Democrat held black majority seat. Florida under
Ron de Santis, big d redrew maps that are already
projected to hand Republicans three or four extra seats. Good
Texas is sitting on a potential five seat pick up.
Good it's legal, all of it, post census, all of
it reflecting actual voters. And said to some activists fever
(05:30):
dream Democrats are losing their mind. They spent a decade
calling this democracy when it helped them. Now that the
Supreme Court took away their cheek code, it's jim Crow
two point zero. Now it's voter suppression. The same people
who jerrymandered California via ballot measure to steal Republican seats
are now clutching pearls. So they're so hard that they're
(05:52):
turning into diamonds. In Louisiana, I think the fun is
really just beginning. Landry isn't ways to any time. He
declared an emergency suspended the May sixteenth Congressional primaries, told
everyone to stop whining and take it to the Supreme Court.
The best part is Jeff Landry keeps saying the quiet
(06:12):
part out loud with his unapologetic drawl. No one gets
extra rights. He's not asking for special treatment, he's just
refusing to give it. The media acts like this is controversial,
and the rest of us are over here thinking, yeah,
that's literally what the Constitution says. Equal protection, color, blunt blind.
(06:33):
What a novel concept. So today everybody's talking about Louisiana.
But the Supreme Court didn't just fix Louisiana. It yanked
the emergency break on a decade of racial engineering that
turned redistricting into a democratic jobs program for race hustling lawyers.
(06:56):
Six conservative justices looked at these contorted, snake like districts
and said, this isn't representation, this is quota costplaying. Jeff
Landry accent and all is the perfect guy.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
For this moment.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
He's not some polished Beltway suit. He's a former sheriff
who understands that voters, black, white, Cajun whatever want districts
that make sense for their actual lives, not some Harvard
professor's racial math project. So now Louisiana is going to
get some fair maps, and so are other states. The
(07:32):
rest of the country is watching. The Supreme Court just
handed us a gift, the right to draw districts the
way the founders intended by the people. Not buy the pigment.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
This is Kenny Webster's pursuit of happiness. On KPRC nine Houston.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Mark Hamill, Luke Skywalker. The guy did one thing his
whole career. Now we have to listen to him for
forty years. Mark Hamill apologized after he posted a photo
of President Trump dead in a grave. Yeah, he probably
should apologize. Even Yoda was like a douchebag you are. Okay,
(08:12):
I'm not the best Yoda impression, but you get the point.
Speaker 5 (08:15):
Is this a spoiled, pampered, narcissistic Hollywood bratt or what.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
The only fans community? Yeah, I know there's an only
fans community. The only fans community is upset at HBO
in Sydney Sweeney.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
They say it.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
Is a trashy portrayal of what an OnlyFans model does.
Sidney Sweeney naked on a TV show called Euphoria, rubbing
an ice cream cone on her bear nipples, dressing up
like a baby in a diaper, dressing up like a
puppy dog. OnlyFans models have been trashing actress Sidney Sweeney's
Euphoria character for her portrayal of what it is they
do for a living. Of course, they take photos of
(08:57):
their bunghole for a living, so I don't really know
that they have any ground to stand on.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Here here with his take on it is stand up.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
Comedian and and and native born Texan Tim math is, Tim,
you would never watch this show or look at pornography,
would you.
Speaker 5 (09:14):
I have never seen a single episode of Euphoria. From
what I hear, it's just about a bunch of you know,
high schoolers and college kids doing drugs in LA. But
now that you're talking about, now that I'm hearing this
controversy about naked Sidney Sweeney. To quote Leonardo DiCaprio's character
(09:35):
Django on Chain, gentlemen, you had my curiosity.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
But now you have my attention right know what I'm.
Speaker 5 (09:39):
Saying, So we might we might have to give this
show a second, a second look, just just say it.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
I feel like when I with things like this, like
the TV show Euphoria, they say, oh, Sidney Sweeney's naked,
dressed up like a puppy dog, showing her bar nipples
with an ice cream cone.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
I think of it sort of like the View, Tim.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
I'm never going to watch the View, but if something
weird happens on the View, I'll go find a clip
on the internet. I'm not too proud to admit I
looked it. It's in a.
Speaker 5 (10:08):
News story to look at the highlights. Yeah, I'll definitely
take a look at the highlights. And they seem to
be like the highlights of the show.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
So you got to admit they're doing a great job
at HBO. But we're talking about it right now. You
and I don't even watch the show, so at the
very least it was a smart They say that she
dressed up like a baby, spread eagle on the couch
and a sheer pink shirt with a rattle in her mouth,
satin corset.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Sweeney wears the Lingerie on.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
The TV show that she sells with Amazon founder Jeff Bezos,
is like, man, you got to admit, from a marketing perspective,
this is smart.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
It's creepy. It's not my cup of tea.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
I mean, a big breasted blonde, I'm into that, but
dressing up like a baby that kind of creeps me out.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Yeah, that's that's weird.
Speaker 5 (10:53):
Like I said, Euphoria is known for being a weird show.
You know, they get into a lot of odd stuff.
But this seems like something we can all agree on
is pretty solid.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
You know.
Speaker 5 (11:05):
I think, like you said, it's a great marketing ploy
and you might have a whole demographic reconsidering this show.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
At this point, I feel I'm sure that's probably true.
I'm still probably not gonna watch it, but I feel like,
considering how big Only Fans has become, this multi bubba
bubba billion dollar industry, billion with a bee, at some
point pop culture has to start making fun of it.
It's bigger than Disney. I mean, it's not bigger than Disney,
but you get my point.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
It's huge.
Speaker 5 (11:35):
Yeah, speaking to Disney, I don't know if you want
to talk about Disney and Only Fans in the same
light since more Disney people got in trouble for a
certain type of thing.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
But that's beside the point. But yeah, it is. It
is getting to.
Speaker 5 (11:48):
Where it's a culturally significant thing. Is only fans, which
maybe says something about our culture, but.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
You know, I don't know.
Speaker 5 (11:57):
I think I think the only fan of ladies are
just because of the same reason why a lot of
those people were mad at Sidney Sweeney for that Genes commercial.
She's just simply hotter than them, and it's jealousy, you know,
when it comes down to it.
Speaker 3 (12:11):
Yeah, I think you're right about that.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Yeah, the Disney thing, the Disney cruise thing has been
all over the news lately, and obviously you got had
some child porn busts on a Disney cruise. I think
that's gonna make the news. People are gonna pay attention
the defense. I've actually heard from me what was in
any ABC News or other people. It was like, well
it wasn't just Disney cruises. Okay, it's still creepy, but
let's stay on the HBO topic for a minute. People
(12:33):
are gonna think I'm being paid by HBO to talk
about this. I'm not actually canceled my HBO subscription this
month because I don't watch it that much. But apparently
during the most recent episode of HBO's Real Time with
Bill Maher, every right winger's favorite left winger, Bill Maher
made an interesting point about gun control. He says, isn't
it odd how now that Luigi Mangione is a big deal,
(12:55):
you don't hear liberals calling for gun control anymore.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
He's got a point. I also wondered about this.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
Do you think that somewhere out there, Tim, there's someone
who really wants to murder a CEO, but they're worried
that they aren't skinny or handsome enough. They haven't looked
smaxed enough yet for the Internet to think that they're
hot like Luigi, so they haven't gone through with it.
Speaker 5 (13:15):
You know what, I think you just stumbled on a
business plan. We could get some personal trainers to make
sure the next wave of assassins are you know, good
looking guys. You don't want to be a flabby, you know,
disgusting looking assassin, because then how are you going to
get all these chicks hitting on you and maybe for
(13:37):
some people, dudes hitting on you. So yeah, we need
to make sure that our next wave of assassins. Have
you know some six pack abs and are looking good?
Speaker 2 (13:46):
Yeah, it's true. Yeah, absolutely. I what a dumb time
to be alive. You've got to admit it is so stupid.
Speaker 3 (13:53):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (13:53):
Another left leaning political show that's getting a lot of
attention right now, Comedy Central, and not a lot of attention.
It's just in the New Today. I actually think it's
not getting attention. I don't think people watch The Daily
Show anymore. But there's a news story today at Breitbart
detailing how Comedy Central's The Daily Show is shaming Republicans
for backing Trump. They said, do you have a humiliation kink?
(14:14):
I don't know, like, is anyone shocked that? Okay, Yeah,
Republicans are backing Trump Democrats. I don't think that Republicans
are doing for Trump what Democrats did for Biden. Democrats
waited for Biden to be gone before Jake Tapper even
acknowledged that the guy was head dementia or purportedly at dementia,
and then wrote a book as though he was the
(14:35):
hero who discovered Biden's dementia. You know, writers from the
Daily Show, what's your reaction to this?
Speaker 5 (14:42):
The Daily Show is so hypocritical. It's ridiculous. I mean,
just look at they They would never go against the
Democratic Party. Sure, they make some jokes about the Democrats
every now and again, but it's usually to you know, hey,
the Democrats aren't going far enough.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
There's usually their take on it.
Speaker 5 (14:59):
But the Democrat Party hasn't had a legitimate primary since
two thousand and eight, and they never talk about that.
They never bring up the fact that Republicans are shamed
for backing Trump. And everybody knows I'm not a Republican,
but most Republicans are going to back a Republican president.
Speaker 3 (15:17):
And yet the.
Speaker 5 (15:17):
Democratic Party has all these people that are slaves to
the Democratic Party, but they haven't even had a democratic primary,
meaning that they didn't let the people decide who their
presidential candidate was since two thousand and eight.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
It's crazy. There's people that are old enough.
Speaker 5 (15:34):
To vote today that wouldn't have been even able to
vote in a Democratic primary because they simply haven't had
a legitimate one since two thousand and eight. So to
make fun of Republicans for backing Trump when you have
half the country backing a party that calls itself democratic,
when they don't even meet the bare minimum status or
(15:56):
standard of being democratic is ridiculous.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Perfectly explained.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Yeah, they haven't had a real primary since two thousand
and eight, and they're over here laughing at our party.
In the meantime, here's one more quickie. I'd love your
take on it. Elliott Page is the name of a
woman named Ellen Page who has mental health issues. And
the report today, I don't know if this is confirmed
or not, but there's a reporter you're claiming Elliott Page.
Ellen Page, the Transman or whatever, is set to reunite
(16:23):
with director Christopher Nolan in an upcoming film, The Odyssey,
scheduled for July seventeenth, twenty twenty sixth release. This is
according to Variety. It says his specific role is under wraps.
Speculation suggests he may play the ghost of Achilles. Okay, great,
Ellen Page is going to play masculine Greek god or
(16:46):
a masculine Greek hero.
Speaker 5 (16:47):
Okay, Yeah, it's one of the more ludicrous things I've seen.
If it's true, it's insane. The last person to notably
play Achilles was I'm Brad Pitt, who has absolutely ripped
the role in Troy, and now that character which is
supposed to be one of the greatest Greek Immy God
(17:10):
heroes of all time, right, is going to be played
allegedly by a five foot one, one pound biological woman,
which if this is all true, I mean, Christopher Nolan
is a great director, inception, the Dark Knight Trilogy, Interstellar,
all that stuff, But if this is true, it's going
(17:31):
to be an absolute disaster. In fact, this odyssey is
allegedly based on a retelling of the Odyssey from a
sort of a modern female perspective, So it's going to
be an s shows, they say in the streets. And
if it is true that Ellen or well I'm sorry,
(17:53):
Elliott Page is playing Achilles, then I don't even know
if Christopher Nolan's can make this thing worse. But we'll see.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
My brother Tim mathis follow him on x and Instagram.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
Tim mathis comedy. You'll be glad you did.
Speaker 4 (18:13):
This is Kenny Webster's Pursuit of Happiness on KPRC nine
point fifty Houston.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
Yeah, all right, So.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Apparently the Americans on board the hantavirus cruise ship will
quarantine and Nebraska.
Speaker 3 (18:35):
Haven't they suffered enough? Enough? Is enough?
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Leave these poor people alone? Also interesting today a Florida
Taco bell worker shot at a customer for putting soda
in water cups. As if Taco Bell customers need more
reason to poop themselves. I know, just ridiculous. Everybody, Hi,
welcome back. Great to be here with you this afternoon.
Always awesome to spend a little bit of time with
you today.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
Kids.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Hey, don't forget what are we doing this Thursday. We
are going to be at the Houston Improv doing stand
up comedy. That's gonna be a lot of fun. We'd
love to see you out Thursday ninth, Do not miss it.
Great date night opportunities called couples Therapy. It will not
be political. It'll be a little political, but it won't
be real political. So come hang with us. Hey, California,
(19:20):
you don't want to go there.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
I wouldn't either.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
California just invented the world's most expensive free gift, four
hundred diapers per newborn. Hand it out at the hospital
like it's a party favor from how I know what
you're thinking, How could that be bad?
Speaker 3 (19:35):
It's a new program.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Taxpayers are forking over fifty cents apiece.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
Here's why this is touchy.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Gavin Newsom is getting diapers and giving them away to
people for free, and it's costing almost five times what
it would cost to buy it in stores. I mean
it's quote unquote free, it's taxpayer funded. Costco sells this
identical product for twelve to sixteen cents per diaper, but
taxpayers in California get to pay fifty cents per diaper
(20:04):
and then give it away to some welfare create queen.
That's not helping families. That's government math, where three times
the price is called compassion and the receipt gets burned
before anyone can read it. They named it Golden State
Start forty million diapers, twenty million dollars, not one penny
(20:28):
from Gavin Nuisance pocket. Of course, the cash does the
Sacramento shuffle, because that's the capital straight into a nonprofit
called Baby to Baby that buys warehouses, trucks and slaps
a fancy state logo on the diaper. Why not just
(20:48):
hand new moms a Costco card? Wouldn't that be more efficient?
Efficiency is what we like?
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Right?
Speaker 2 (20:56):
Democrats prefer the scenic route through their wife's favorite nonprofit
board Buddies.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Oh yeah, no surprise here.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Baby to Baby's co CEO just happens to sit on
the board of the California Partners Project, co founded by
none other than Gavin Newsom's wife. Pure coincidence, like finding
a hooker in the governor's hotel room and calling it
constituent services. This isn't a program, it's a markup with
(21:29):
a onesie on it, and it's not new. Government has
been turning everyday junk into luxury items since the dinosaurs
invented taxes. Back in the glorious nineteen eighties, the Pentagon,
the folks guarding our freedom, paid four hundred and thirty
five dollars for a clawhammer, not a thor hammer, mind,
(21:53):
you know a hammer that also brews espresso.
Speaker 3 (21:58):
A regular claw hammer.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
You could buy it home depot for eleven bucks and
still have money left over for beer.
Speaker 3 (22:04):
A lot of money.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
They also dropped six hundred and forty bucks on a
plastic toilet seat for Navy planes, same seat your drunk
uncle uses in his man cave. Seven six hundred dollars
for an Air Force coffee maker, not a Kurig that
launches drones, a mister coffee with wings.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
The list was a comedy special.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Six hundred dollars ashtrays seventy four thousand dollars, ladders two
thousand dollars monkey wrenches. Do you remember this? I was
a little kid at the time. Congress held hearings. The
public laughed until we cried. Then everybody went back to
sleep because the next scandal was already warming up. The
(22:49):
joke is still running. Look I like Trump. But in
twenty eighteen, the Air Force spent thirty two grand replacing
twenty five broken coffee cups on a KC ten tanker,
not sippy cups for fighter pilots, not cups. The double
as missile guidance systems regular insulated mugs. You could buy
(23:11):
a target for fifteen bucks in a punch card. A
few years later, they paid fourteen thousand dollars each for
a three D printed toilet seat lid on a military
aircraft toilet seat lids. The Defense Department Inspector General found
(23:33):
a C seventeen Globemaster soap dispenser build at one hundred
and forty nine thousand dollars. A soap dispenser the kind
that squirts liquid soap. If you're lucky, you could buy
one at a truck stop, steal the extra one for
your cousin and still come out ahead by one hundred
(23:53):
and forty eight grand. Of course, we expect this from
the government, but not shockingly. It's happened in California quite
a bit too. San Francisco spent four years and north
of eleven thousand dollars designing a smart public trash can.
Not a can that judges your recycling choices or writes
(24:13):
poetry about your garbage, just a can that holds trash
off the shelf. Models do the same job for six
hundred bucks. But why buy one when you can create
six new consultant jobs, three focus groups, and a ribbon
cutting ceremony that costs more than the can itself. Guys,
(24:37):
this is the government's superpower, taking something normal people buy
every day, hammers, diapers, coffee, toilet seats, and turning it
into performance art with your money. They add layers like
a paranoid wedding cake, nonprofits, studies, prototypes, diversity impact reports,
union rules, environmental blessings, and enough middlemen to start their
(25:04):
own softball league. Every layer skims a little cream, every
layer writes a press release about how essential it is.
The taxpayer is the guy who shows up with a
credit card and leaves with heartburn.
Speaker 3 (25:22):
The diaper racket is just the latest verse.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
California could have mailed every new parent a gift card
and save two thirds of the cash. But gift cards
don't come with board seats for the governor's inner circle.
Gift cards don't let you stand at a podium and
say we're investing in families while the actual investment is
an overhead and optics and quiet little kickback shuffles. Gift
(25:49):
cards are what your grandma does. Government does theater with
better lighting, and the voters keep buying tickets. California look
to the most expensive state in the un Union, sky
high taxes, impossible housing regulations thicker than a Kardashian's contour,
and said more of this, please, Then they brag about
(26:14):
being progressive while the rest of us watch our paychecks
get diapered in bureaucracy. Look, I'm not against helping new parents.
Maybe these are tiny tyrants who poop like it's their
Olympic event. Diapers cost real money. But if you're going
to take my cash at metaphorical gunpoint, sorry, through the
(26:36):
sacred ritual of progressive taxation, at least don't turn it
into a magic trick where fifty cent diapers disappear and
reappear as equity. Don't pretend it's charity when any minivan
mom with a membership card can beat you by a mile.
Don't act shocked when people notice the nonprofit with the
(26:57):
governor adjacent board suddenly gets a sweet hard deal. Gosh,
must be fun to be married to the governor. This
is why cynicism is the only rational response, not because
we hate babies, because we hate watching our money get
laundered through.
Speaker 5 (27:16):
I'm listening to pursuit of happiness, lady.
Speaker 4 (27:20):
This is Kenny Webster's pursuit of happiness on KPRC nine
fifty Houston.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
He eybody, Kenny Webster here with a quick reminder, gold
and silver just take record highs now. Wall Street's saying, hey,
it's never been a better time to invest. Our national
debt is so big it needs its own zip code.
The dollar's been doing the limbo inflations out here, shrinking
our savings like a cheap sweater in the dryer. One minute,
you've got retirement money. Next minute, it's not enough for
(27:49):
a happy meal in some loose change. But gold and
silver always a smart idea. In fact, if you call
Lear Capital, you could find out about how you could
qualify for twin twenty thousand dollars in bonus coins. No joke,
Pick up the phone, call your Capital. Eight hundred three
six four nine two zero zero. That's eight hundred three
(28:09):
six four nine two zero zero. Rush Limbaugh famously endorsed
Lear Capital. I endorse them to find out why call
your capital at eight hundred three six four nine two
zero zero. Students at Harvard are dealing with stress by
signing up to get punched in the face. Wow, think
(28:30):
about that America where even the smart kids are stupid.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
Isn't that something that is just amazing? How depressing that is?
Speaker 2 (28:39):
Breipart dot com today reporting on the Los Angeles Republican
mayoral candidate Spencer Pratt. He says he plans to give
homeless camps three weeks notice before the handcuffs come out.
Y'all get who Spencer is at this point, in case
you don't, in case you've been living under a rock.
He was a reality TV star I don't know, twenty
years ago. He's about my age. He's a millennial, and
(29:01):
he is very conservative, very right wing. He was doing
an interview this weekend, and he said, once you start
putting handcuffs on people, watch how many people leave. If
you let everyone do drugs and do whatever they want,
and let the criminals make the outside and asylum with
no guards. If you let them do that, they're gonna
do that. Then he laid out the plan. He said,
(29:23):
when I'm mayor, my plan is, first three weeks, signs
up across the city. No more nakedness, no more drug use,
no more robbing, no more dog abuse, on every sign,
everywhere you go. We're gonna go around. We're going to
warn everybody. Hey, we've got three more weeks of this
(29:44):
clock's ticking. Just keep telling everyone, just so people are aware,
they may start leaving. And then when the three weeks
or maybe we'll even do it two weeks in. Maybe
maybe we'll do it a little faster. We'll start enforcing
the laws, coursing those laws, and then boom, streets will
be back. He also pointed out he said, you know
(30:06):
who else, I'm gonna bring in the CDC because there
is medieval diseases.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
In these encampments. They're not cleaning the streets. People are
just living in feces.
Speaker 4 (30:17):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (30:18):
Actually had an audio recording. I just read the quote
to you. I had this. You start putting a handcuffs,
some people watch, how many people leave? I didn't realize
I had a recording of it here. Sorry, I just
read you the transcript.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Whatever you get the point, Pratt, Spencer Pratt is taking
the Trump approach. All Trump has done to fix crime
in Washington, d C, secure the border, and launch his
mass deportation program is enforce the law.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
Wow, what a concept.
Speaker 2 (30:46):
Unlike every Democrat, every modern leftist, every Republican rhino, Trump
is taking the attitude of let's just fix this thing,
and Pratt, I guess.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
Is doing the same.
Speaker 2 (30:59):
Some right winger are now mad at Pratt because they
just discovered he's pro Israel. I don't know what that
has to do with being mayor Los Angeles. And then
they're also mad because he used to be into crystals
or something like that. Well, guess what, he'd still be
better than New York's communist mayor, a guy who promised
all kinds of free stuff he can't deliver. Pratt is
(31:20):
promising to clean up the streets merely by enforcing the law,
and you could bet the police force will be behind him.
One hundred percent because that's why they got into that
line of work. Doesn't sound that bad to me. I've
been to LA in years. It's too gross and dirty.
I hope he delivers without saying so. It seems like
(31:41):
Spencer Pratt's also pointing out how easy it is to
fix these problems, while his left wing opponents get bogged
down in housing people who don't want to be housed
and offering treatment to people who don't want to be treated.
Spencer Pratt as a candidate, it seems to understand that
(32:02):
the homeless are not law abiding families dealing with a
missed paycheck. It is a choice for many of them.
These are criminals. These are degenerate drug addicts. The safety
nets are already in place. These people don't want a
safety net. They want to get high and live in
filth in a public space. Do you want your kids
(32:25):
walking through that so they can get to public school?
Is that what you want in your neighborhood. The dog
abuse stuff really creep me out. Did you guys see
that video online recently where they're shooting up dogs with
fentanyl in the homeless encampments so they can figure out
if their drugs are any good if they want to
know if their drugs are cleaned, so they test them
(32:45):
on their dogs. Look, I think people who want help
should be given help. For a lot of these homeless people,
they don't want help. These people do not want to
be helped. We know that because plenty of help is
available to anyone who falls through the cracks.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
These days.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Life is sweet when you're on welfare. People on welfare
have a home and they have a lot more than that.
They've got heating and air conditioning. They have Netflix. They
have an iPhone. Yeah, free iPhone, I know, Obama Phone
they used to call it. Turns out it was a
program actually created by George W. Bush, but for some reason,
(33:29):
the general public game Obama credit for the free iPhones,
and he took it. People on welfare in America are fat.
They have plenty to eat. They get free medical care
that includes rehab coverage. Weirdly, that's the part they don't
care about getting. Many of them have chosen not to
(33:50):
accept the help. Instead, they want to terrorize the streets.
That's choice. So Spencer Pratt is phenomenally gifted.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
Right now.
Speaker 2 (34:03):
At explaining what's wrong with LA. I don't know that
much about his past. I didn't watch him.
Speaker 3 (34:11):
On reality TV.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
Look I don't I'm not one of these gung ho Zionist,
anti Zionist, pro Israel, anti Isid, indo Israel. I don't
have time to worry about it. I live in America.
He's not running for mayor of Jerusalem. He's running for
mayor in Los Angeles, and they need some help. Let's
just tell what he's pushing makes sense to these people.
(34:39):
I don't know if he has any chance of winning.
I don't live in LA But if Pratt does win,
his win will be based on an unapologetic conservative message
on the issues of law and order, fiscal sanity, and
taxpayer abuse. What a novel idea, that is, what a radical,
crazy idea? That is?
Speaker 3 (35:01):
Where will the homeless go? You ask?
Speaker 2 (35:02):
The only correct answer to that question is that's their problem.
You don't have to solve all the world's problems when
other people's problems are making life worse for you. Sometimes
you just got to get him out of the community.
Could you imagine an entire neighborhood where homelessness is so
bad that it's named after it. You know the rock
(35:23):
band skid Row. That's a real place that's in Maxine
Waters District.
Speaker 3 (35:29):
That's how bad it is in LA. It's a really
cute news story today about a seven year old student
in Rhode Island named Samir.
Speaker 2 (35:40):
Samir is being called a hero after saving a classmate's life.
The classmate was choking during snack time, and Samir rushed
over and performed the Heimlich maneuver as soon as he
saw the other kid choking. A seven year old save
someone's life with the Heimlich maneuver.
Speaker 3 (35:56):
That's kind of cool.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
And he had only learned it the year before in school,
which to him was probably a long time ago. Here's
Samir and his mom talking about the life saving action.
Speaker 6 (36:06):
I saw him choking. My teacher told me to calm
down and everyone sit down. She said he's gonna comfort help.
And then I came and then and did the heimat him.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
I was shocked, obviously, as a seven year old, I
don't really expect friends to know something like that.
Speaker 3 (36:22):
There was really no words that kid.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
Doesn't that warm your heart? That is just beautiful. Pray
be kind to your neighbor. Join us this Thursday night
at the Houston Improv. We're gonna have a lot of
fun doing stand up comedy this week. I hope you'll
be there. I love you all. We'll be back bright
and early tomorrow morning for more of what you bought
a radio for.
Speaker 6 (36:46):
You are listening to the Pursuit of Happiness Radio.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Tell the government to kiss you're ass when you listen
to this show, do you
Jigana government sucks. Suit of Happiness radio is deluxe. Liberty
and Freedom will make you smile. A suit of Habing
and us on your radio. Toyle just as Cheeseburgers and
a liberty rise at the food.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
A pedestrian at the Denver Airport was struck and killed
by a Frontier Airlines plane after jumping over a security fence.
His soul was then whisked away by Spirit Airlines. Oh
that joke offended you, then don't join us This Thursday
night at the Houston Improv for couples therapy. Dustin Simms
(00:40):
is our special guest. He is so funny. If you're
not doing anything this Thursday and you love edgy, right
leaning comedy, it's actually not a political show.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
It's not real political. Everything's a little political, but.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
It's all about couples and dating and sex and single
people are welcome. Bachelorette parties, love to go insuls are
encouraged to attend. We hope you'll be there for that.
That's this Thursday night at the Houston Improv. Come out
for date night. We'll get you out of there in
time for bed. Get there at seven, well, we'll get
you done by nine.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
Don't worry. Hey, uh, who's here?
Speaker 2 (01:12):
This afternoon Tony Ortiz stopping by from Current Revolt dot com.
We are going to talk about all things Texas politics today,
including some strange, bizarre news about special benefits for people
with H one B visas in the state of Texas
should be sound as illegal.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
We'll give you the details.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Also stopping by this afternoon, Tim mathis the stand up
comedian with all the strangest things from Hollywood. Will detail
all of it, but first, let's talk about this last
night on sixty Minutes. We watch it so you don't
have to. Louisiana Governor Jeff Landry walked into that slick
CBS studio like a man who just finished checking his
crab traps and decided to ruin a perfectly good liberal narrative.
(01:55):
The interviewer was a woman named Cecilia Vega, polished as
a marble countertop, hit him with a question.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
She said, what about the elections during wartime?
Speaker 2 (02:06):
They're upset because they suspended a congressional primary so that
they could reconsider the districting lines in the state of Louisiana.
And Landry didn't even blink. You just leaned in with
that thick Cajun drawl and dropped a truth bomb. You
cannot say that we are all created equal and then
allow a law to sort people.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
Based on race. He's right.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Have you guys looked at what the congressional district in
Louisiana looks like? That's so controversial right now? It goes
from Shreveport to Baton Rouge. Baton Rouge is the capital
of Louisiana. Shreveport is basically East Dallas. I got some
pushback when I said that this morning from people that
don't live in Shreveport, and then I got dozens of
(02:49):
messages from people in Sreeport saying, no, Kenny's right. We're
all Dallas cowboys face a very different economy. It's a
very different culture in Shreeport. Why would they have the
same congressional representative as Batners doesn't make any sense. The
national media didn't know what to do with my man,
Jeff Landry. Here's the guy, very sharp man, quoting the
fourteenth Amendment like it's his grocery list, who talks like
(03:12):
he spent the morning eating boot ann and yelling at
a Nutria. Rat Coastal reporters East Coast and West coast
alike kept waiting for the dumb Southerner moment so they
could file their maga governor says something horrifying story.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
It never came.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Instead, they got a calm, lethal logic and zero apology.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
Was he treated fairly please?
Speaker 2 (03:34):
They treated him like a zoo exhibit that somehow learned
constitutional law. The accent through them so hard they spent
half the segment doing that subtle bless his heart head
tilt classic. They can handle Harvard liberals with lisps, but
a conservative who sounds like he's from actual America causes
them all to short circuit.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
But anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself here.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
This circus didn't start yesterday on sixty minutes or in Louisiana,
for years, Democrats have been treating the Voting Rights Act
like a magical racial slot machine. Pull the lever, demand
another snake shaped majority black district, and then scream racism
if anyone complains. So in Louisiana, it was pointed out
(04:20):
that Treeport's connected to Baton Rouge, two cities that have
less in common than Kale and Gumbo, with a district
so ridiculous it looked like it was drawn by a
drunk with a crayon. Enter the Supreme Court six to
three SmackDown. The conservative justices said, enough, the rule of
the map was unconstitutionally gerrymandered. No more forcing states to
(04:43):
play racial bean counter good, no more proportional representation by
skin color or else. That decision was the political equivalent
of turning on the lights in a roach motel. Suddenly
every normal person in America could breathe again. Good Tennessee
(05:06):
acts its lone Democrat held black majority seat. Florida under
Ron de Santis, big d redrew maps that are already
projected to hand Republicans three or four extra seats. Good
Texas is sitting on a potential five seat pick up.
Good it's legal, all of it, post census, all of
it reflecting actual voters. And said to some activists fever
(05:30):
dream Democrats are losing their mind. They spent a decade
calling this democracy when it helped them. Now that the
Supreme Court took away their cheek code, it's jim Crow
two point zero. Now it's voter suppression. The same people
who jerrymandered California via ballot measure to steal Republican seats
are now clutching pearls. So they're so hard that they're
(05:52):
turning into diamonds. In Louisiana, I think the fun is
really just beginning. Landry isn't ways to any time. He
declared an emergency suspended the May sixteenth Congressional primaries, told
everyone to stop whining and take it to the Supreme Court.
The best part is Jeff Landry keeps saying the quiet
(06:12):
part out loud with his unapologetic drawl. No one gets
extra rights. He's not asking for special treatment, he's just
refusing to give it. The media acts like this is controversial,
and the rest of us are over here thinking, yeah,
that's literally what the Constitution says. Equal protection, color, blunt blind.
(06:33):
What a novel concept. So today everybody's talking about Louisiana.
But the Supreme Court didn't just fix Louisiana. It yanked
the emergency break on a decade of racial engineering that
turned redistricting into a democratic jobs program for race hustling lawyers.
(06:56):
Six conservative justices looked at these contorted, snake like districts
and said, this isn't representation, this is quota costplaying. Jeff
Landry accent and all is the perfect guy.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
For this moment.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
He's not some polished Beltway suit. He's a former sheriff
who understands that voters, black, white, Cajun whatever want districts
that make sense for their actual lives, not some Harvard
professor's racial math project. So now Louisiana is going to
get some fair maps, and so are other states. The
(07:32):
rest of the country is watching. The Supreme Court just
handed us a gift, the right to draw districts the
way the founders intended by the people. Not buy the pigment.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
This is Kenny Webster's pursuit of happiness. On KPRC nine Houston.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Mark Hamill, Luke Skywalker. The guy did one thing his
whole career. Now we have to listen to him for
forty years. Mark Hamill apologized after he posted a photo
of President Trump dead in a grave. Yeah, he probably
should apologize. Even Yoda was like a douchebag you are. Okay,
(08:12):
I'm not the best Yoda impression, but you get the point.
Speaker 5 (08:15):
Is this a spoiled, pampered, narcissistic Hollywood bratt or what.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
The only fans community? Yeah, I know there's an only
fans community. The only fans community is upset at HBO
in Sydney Sweeney.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
They say it.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
Is a trashy portrayal of what an OnlyFans model does.
Sidney Sweeney naked on a TV show called Euphoria, rubbing
an ice cream cone on her bear nipples, dressing up
like a baby in a diaper, dressing up like a
puppy dog. OnlyFans models have been trashing actress Sidney Sweeney's
Euphoria character for her portrayal of what it is they
do for a living. Of course, they take photos of
(08:57):
their bunghole for a living, so I don't really know
that they have any ground to stand on.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Here here with his take on it is stand up.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
Comedian and and and native born Texan Tim math is, Tim,
you would never watch this show or look at pornography,
would you.
Speaker 5 (09:14):
I have never seen a single episode of Euphoria. From
what I hear, it's just about a bunch of you know,
high schoolers and college kids doing drugs in LA. But
now that you're talking about, now that I'm hearing this
controversy about naked Sidney Sweeney. To quote Leonardo DiCaprio's character
(09:35):
Django on Chain, gentlemen, you had my curiosity.
Speaker 3 (09:37):
But now you have my attention right know what I'm.
Speaker 5 (09:39):
Saying, So we might we might have to give this
show a second, a second look, just just say it.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
I feel like when I with things like this, like
the TV show Euphoria, they say, oh, Sidney Sweeney's naked,
dressed up like a puppy dog, showing her bar nipples
with an ice cream cone.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
I think of it sort of like the View, Tim.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
I'm never going to watch the View, but if something
weird happens on the View, I'll go find a clip
on the internet. I'm not too proud to admit I
looked it. It's in a.
Speaker 5 (10:08):
News story to look at the highlights. Yeah, I'll definitely
take a look at the highlights. And they seem to
be like the highlights of the show.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
So you got to admit they're doing a great job
at HBO. But we're talking about it right now. You
and I don't even watch the show, so at the
very least it was a smart They say that she
dressed up like a baby, spread eagle on the couch
and a sheer pink shirt with a rattle in her mouth,
satin corset.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Sweeney wears the Lingerie on.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
The TV show that she sells with Amazon founder Jeff Bezos,
is like, man, you got to admit, from a marketing perspective,
this is smart.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
It's creepy. It's not my cup of tea.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
I mean, a big breasted blonde, I'm into that, but
dressing up like a baby that kind of creeps me out.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Yeah, that's that's weird.
Speaker 5 (10:53):
Like I said, Euphoria is known for being a weird show.
You know, they get into a lot of odd stuff.
But this seems like something we can all agree on
is pretty solid.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
You know.
Speaker 5 (11:05):
I think, like you said, it's a great marketing ploy
and you might have a whole demographic reconsidering this show.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
At this point, I feel I'm sure that's probably true.
I'm still probably not gonna watch it, but I feel like,
considering how big Only Fans has become, this multi bubba
bubba billion dollar industry, billion with a bee, at some
point pop culture has to start making fun of it.
It's bigger than Disney. I mean, it's not bigger than Disney,
but you get my point.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
It's huge.
Speaker 5 (11:35):
Yeah, speaking to Disney, I don't know if you want
to talk about Disney and Only Fans in the same
light since more Disney people got in trouble for a
certain type of thing.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
But that's beside the point. But yeah, it is. It
is getting to.
Speaker 5 (11:48):
Where it's a culturally significant thing. Is only fans, which
maybe says something about our culture, but.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
You know, I don't know.
Speaker 5 (11:57):
I think I think the only fan of ladies are
just because of the same reason why a lot of
those people were mad at Sidney Sweeney for that Genes commercial.
She's just simply hotter than them, and it's jealousy, you know,
when it comes down to it.
Speaker 3 (12:11):
Yeah, I think you're right about that.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Yeah, the Disney thing, the Disney cruise thing has been
all over the news lately, and obviously you got had
some child porn busts on a Disney cruise. I think
that's gonna make the news. People are gonna pay attention
the defense. I've actually heard from me what was in
any ABC News or other people. It was like, well
it wasn't just Disney cruises. Okay, it's still creepy, but
let's stay on the HBO topic for a minute. People
(12:33):
are gonna think I'm being paid by HBO to talk
about this. I'm not actually canceled my HBO subscription this
month because I don't watch it that much. But apparently
during the most recent episode of HBO's Real Time with
Bill Maher, every right winger's favorite left winger, Bill Maher
made an interesting point about gun control. He says, isn't
it odd how now that Luigi Mangione is a big deal,
(12:55):
you don't hear liberals calling for gun control anymore.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
He's got a point. I also wondered about this.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
Do you think that somewhere out there, Tim, there's someone
who really wants to murder a CEO, but they're worried
that they aren't skinny or handsome enough. They haven't looked
smaxed enough yet for the Internet to think that they're
hot like Luigi, so they haven't gone through with it.
Speaker 5 (13:15):
You know what, I think you just stumbled on a
business plan. We could get some personal trainers to make
sure the next wave of assassins are you know, good
looking guys. You don't want to be a flabby, you know,
disgusting looking assassin, because then how are you going to
get all these chicks hitting on you and maybe for
(13:37):
some people, dudes hitting on you. So yeah, we need
to make sure that our next wave of assassins. Have
you know some six pack abs and are looking good?
Speaker 2 (13:46):
Yeah, it's true. Yeah, absolutely. I what a dumb time
to be alive. You've got to admit it is so stupid.
Speaker 3 (13:53):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (13:53):
Another left leaning political show that's getting a lot of
attention right now, Comedy Central, and not a lot of attention.
It's just in the New Today. I actually think it's
not getting attention. I don't think people watch The Daily
Show anymore. But there's a news story today at Breitbart
detailing how Comedy Central's The Daily Show is shaming Republicans
for backing Trump. They said, do you have a humiliation kink?
(14:14):
I don't know, like, is anyone shocked that? Okay, Yeah,
Republicans are backing Trump Democrats. I don't think that Republicans
are doing for Trump what Democrats did for Biden. Democrats
waited for Biden to be gone before Jake Tapper even
acknowledged that the guy was head dementia or purportedly at dementia,
and then wrote a book as though he was the
(14:35):
hero who discovered Biden's dementia. You know, writers from the
Daily Show, what's your reaction to this?
Speaker 5 (14:42):
The Daily Show is so hypocritical. It's ridiculous. I mean,
just look at they They would never go against the
Democratic Party. Sure, they make some jokes about the Democrats
every now and again, but it's usually to you know, hey,
the Democrats aren't going far enough.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
There's usually their take on it.
Speaker 5 (14:59):
But the Democrat Party hasn't had a legitimate primary since
two thousand and eight, and they never talk about that.
They never bring up the fact that Republicans are shamed
for backing Trump. And everybody knows I'm not a Republican,
but most Republicans are going to back a Republican president.
Speaker 3 (15:17):
And yet the.
Speaker 5 (15:17):
Democratic Party has all these people that are slaves to
the Democratic Party, but they haven't even had a democratic primary,
meaning that they didn't let the people decide who their
presidential candidate was since two thousand and eight.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
It's crazy. There's people that are old enough.
Speaker 5 (15:34):
To vote today that wouldn't have been even able to
vote in a Democratic primary because they simply haven't had
a legitimate one since two thousand and eight. So to
make fun of Republicans for backing Trump when you have
half the country backing a party that calls itself democratic,
when they don't even meet the bare minimum status or
(15:56):
standard of being democratic is ridiculous.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Perfectly explained.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Yeah, they haven't had a real primary since two thousand
and eight, and they're over here laughing at our party.
In the meantime, here's one more quickie. I'd love your
take on it. Elliott Page is the name of a
woman named Ellen Page who has mental health issues. And
the report today, I don't know if this is confirmed
or not, but there's a reporter you're claiming Elliott Page.
Ellen Page, the Transman or whatever, is set to reunite
(16:23):
with director Christopher Nolan in an upcoming film, The Odyssey,
scheduled for July seventeenth, twenty twenty sixth release. This is
according to Variety. It says his specific role is under wraps.
Speculation suggests he may play the ghost of Achilles. Okay, great,
Ellen Page is going to play masculine Greek god or
(16:46):
a masculine Greek hero.
Speaker 5 (16:47):
Okay, Yeah, it's one of the more ludicrous things I've seen.
If it's true, it's insane. The last person to notably
play Achilles was I'm Brad Pitt, who has absolutely ripped
the role in Troy, and now that character which is
supposed to be one of the greatest Greek Immy God
(17:10):
heroes of all time, right, is going to be played
allegedly by a five foot one, one pound biological woman,
which if this is all true, I mean, Christopher Nolan
is a great director, inception, the Dark Knight Trilogy, Interstellar,
all that stuff, But if this is true, it's going
(17:31):
to be an absolute disaster. In fact, this odyssey is
allegedly based on a retelling of the Odyssey from a
sort of a modern female perspective, So it's going to
be an s shows, they say in the streets. And
if it is true that Ellen or well I'm sorry,
(17:53):
Elliott Page is playing Achilles, then I don't even know
if Christopher Nolan's can make this thing worse. But we'll see.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
My brother Tim mathis follow him on x and Instagram.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
Tim mathis comedy. You'll be glad you did.
Speaker 4 (18:13):
This is Kenny Webster's Pursuit of Happiness on KPRC nine
point fifty Houston.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
Yeah, all right, So.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Apparently the Americans on board the hantavirus cruise ship will
quarantine and Nebraska.
Speaker 3 (18:35):
Haven't they suffered enough? Enough? Is enough?
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Leave these poor people alone? Also interesting today a Florida
Taco bell worker shot at a customer for putting soda
in water cups. As if Taco Bell customers need more
reason to poop themselves. I know, just ridiculous. Everybody, Hi,
welcome back. Great to be here with you this afternoon.
Always awesome to spend a little bit of time with
you today.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
Kids.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Hey, don't forget what are we doing this Thursday. We
are going to be at the Houston Improv doing stand
up comedy. That's gonna be a lot of fun. We'd
love to see you out Thursday ninth, Do not miss it.
Great date night opportunities called couples Therapy. It will not
be political. It'll be a little political, but it won't
be real political. So come hang with us. Hey, California,
(19:20):
you don't want to go there.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
I wouldn't either.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
California just invented the world's most expensive free gift, four
hundred diapers per newborn. Hand it out at the hospital
like it's a party favor from how I know what
you're thinking, How could that be bad?
Speaker 3 (19:35):
It's a new program.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Taxpayers are forking over fifty cents apiece.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
Here's why this is touchy.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Gavin Newsom is getting diapers and giving them away to
people for free, and it's costing almost five times what
it would cost to buy it in stores. I mean
it's quote unquote free, it's taxpayer funded. Costco sells this
identical product for twelve to sixteen cents per diaper, but
taxpayers in California get to pay fifty cents per diaper
(20:04):
and then give it away to some welfare create queen.
That's not helping families. That's government math, where three times
the price is called compassion and the receipt gets burned
before anyone can read it. They named it Golden State
Start forty million diapers, twenty million dollars, not one penny
(20:28):
from Gavin Nuisance pocket. Of course, the cash does the
Sacramento shuffle, because that's the capital straight into a nonprofit
called Baby to Baby that buys warehouses, trucks and slaps
a fancy state logo on the diaper. Why not just
(20:48):
hand new moms a Costco card? Wouldn't that be more efficient?
Efficiency is what we like?
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Right?
Speaker 2 (20:56):
Democrats prefer the scenic route through their wife's favorite nonprofit
board Buddies.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Oh yeah, no surprise here.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Baby to Baby's co CEO just happens to sit on
the board of the California Partners Project, co founded by
none other than Gavin Newsom's wife. Pure coincidence, like finding
a hooker in the governor's hotel room and calling it
constituent services. This isn't a program, it's a markup with
(21:29):
a onesie on it, and it's not new. Government has
been turning everyday junk into luxury items since the dinosaurs
invented taxes. Back in the glorious nineteen eighties, the Pentagon,
the folks guarding our freedom, paid four hundred and thirty
five dollars for a clawhammer, not a thor hammer, mind,
(21:53):
you know a hammer that also brews espresso.
Speaker 3 (21:58):
A regular claw hammer.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
You could buy it home depot for eleven bucks and
still have money left over for beer.
Speaker 3 (22:04):
A lot of money.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
They also dropped six hundred and forty bucks on a
plastic toilet seat for Navy planes, same seat your drunk
uncle uses in his man cave. Seven six hundred dollars
for an Air Force coffee maker, not a Kurig that
launches drones, a mister coffee with wings.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
The list was a comedy special.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Six hundred dollars ashtrays seventy four thousand dollars, ladders two
thousand dollars monkey wrenches. Do you remember this? I was
a little kid at the time. Congress held hearings. The
public laughed until we cried. Then everybody went back to
sleep because the next scandal was already warming up. The
(22:49):
joke is still running. Look I like Trump. But in
twenty eighteen, the Air Force spent thirty two grand replacing
twenty five broken coffee cups on a KC ten tanker,
not sippy cups for fighter pilots, not cups. The double
as missile guidance systems regular insulated mugs. You could buy
(23:11):
a target for fifteen bucks in a punch card. A
few years later, they paid fourteen thousand dollars each for
a three D printed toilet seat lid on a military
aircraft toilet seat lids. The Defense Department Inspector General found
(23:33):
a C seventeen Globemaster soap dispenser build at one hundred
and forty nine thousand dollars. A soap dispenser the kind
that squirts liquid soap. If you're lucky, you could buy
one at a truck stop, steal the extra one for
your cousin and still come out ahead by one hundred
(23:53):
and forty eight grand. Of course, we expect this from
the government, but not shockingly. It's happened in California quite
a bit too. San Francisco spent four years and north
of eleven thousand dollars designing a smart public trash can.
Not a can that judges your recycling choices or writes
(24:13):
poetry about your garbage, just a can that holds trash
off the shelf. Models do the same job for six
hundred bucks. But why buy one when you can create
six new consultant jobs, three focus groups, and a ribbon
cutting ceremony that costs more than the can itself. Guys,
(24:37):
this is the government's superpower, taking something normal people buy
every day, hammers, diapers, coffee, toilet seats, and turning it
into performance art with your money. They add layers like
a paranoid wedding cake, nonprofits, studies, prototypes, diversity impact reports,
union rules, environmental blessings, and enough middlemen to start their
(25:04):
own softball league. Every layer skims a little cream, every
layer writes a press release about how essential it is.
The taxpayer is the guy who shows up with a
credit card and leaves with heartburn.
Speaker 3 (25:22):
The diaper racket is just the latest verse.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
California could have mailed every new parent a gift card
and save two thirds of the cash. But gift cards
don't come with board seats for the governor's inner circle.
Gift cards don't let you stand at a podium and
say we're investing in families while the actual investment is
an overhead and optics and quiet little kickback shuffles. Gift
(25:49):
cards are what your grandma does. Government does theater with
better lighting, and the voters keep buying tickets. California look
to the most expensive state in the un Union, sky
high taxes, impossible housing regulations thicker than a Kardashian's contour,
and said more of this, please, Then they brag about
(26:14):
being progressive while the rest of us watch our paychecks
get diapered in bureaucracy. Look, I'm not against helping new parents.
Maybe these are tiny tyrants who poop like it's their
Olympic event. Diapers cost real money. But if you're going
to take my cash at metaphorical gunpoint, sorry, through the
(26:36):
sacred ritual of progressive taxation, at least don't turn it
into a magic trick where fifty cent diapers disappear and
reappear as equity. Don't pretend it's charity when any minivan
mom with a membership card can beat you by a mile.
Don't act shocked when people notice the nonprofit with the
(26:57):
governor adjacent board suddenly gets a sweet hard deal. Gosh,
must be fun to be married to the governor. This
is why cynicism is the only rational response, not because
we hate babies, because we hate watching our money get
laundered through.
Speaker 5 (27:16):
I'm listening to pursuit of happiness, lady.
Speaker 4 (27:20):
This is Kenny Webster's pursuit of happiness on KPRC nine
fifty Houston.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
He eybody, Kenny Webster here with a quick reminder, gold
and silver just take record highs now. Wall Street's saying, hey,
it's never been a better time to invest. Our national
debt is so big it needs its own zip code.
The dollar's been doing the limbo inflations out here, shrinking
our savings like a cheap sweater in the dryer. One minute,
you've got retirement money. Next minute, it's not enough for
(27:49):
a happy meal in some loose change. But gold and
silver always a smart idea. In fact, if you call
Lear Capital, you could find out about how you could
qualify for twin twenty thousand dollars in bonus coins. No joke,
Pick up the phone, call your Capital. Eight hundred three
six four nine two zero zero. That's eight hundred three
(28:09):
six four nine two zero zero. Rush Limbaugh famously endorsed
Lear Capital. I endorse them to find out why call
your capital at eight hundred three six four nine two
zero zero. Students at Harvard are dealing with stress by
signing up to get punched in the face. Wow, think
(28:30):
about that America where even the smart kids are stupid.
Speaker 3 (28:35):
Isn't that something that is just amazing? How depressing that is?
Speaker 2 (28:39):
Breipart dot com today reporting on the Los Angeles Republican
mayoral candidate Spencer Pratt. He says he plans to give
homeless camps three weeks notice before the handcuffs come out.
Y'all get who Spencer is at this point, in case
you don't, in case you've been living under a rock.
He was a reality TV star I don't know, twenty
years ago. He's about my age. He's a millennial, and
(29:01):
he is very conservative, very right wing. He was doing
an interview this weekend, and he said, once you start
putting handcuffs on people, watch how many people leave. If
you let everyone do drugs and do whatever they want,
and let the criminals make the outside and asylum with
no guards. If you let them do that, they're gonna
do that. Then he laid out the plan. He said,
(29:23):
when I'm mayor, my plan is, first three weeks, signs
up across the city. No more nakedness, no more drug use,
no more robbing, no more dog abuse, on every sign,
everywhere you go. We're gonna go around. We're going to
warn everybody. Hey, we've got three more weeks of this
(29:44):
clock's ticking. Just keep telling everyone, just so people are aware,
they may start leaving. And then when the three weeks
or maybe we'll even do it two weeks in. Maybe
maybe we'll do it a little faster. We'll start enforcing
the laws, coursing those laws, and then boom, streets will
be back. He also pointed out he said, you know
(30:06):
who else, I'm gonna bring in the CDC because there
is medieval diseases.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
In these encampments. They're not cleaning the streets. People are
just living in feces.
Speaker 4 (30:17):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (30:18):
Actually had an audio recording. I just read the quote
to you. I had this. You start putting a handcuffs,
some people watch, how many people leave? I didn't realize
I had a recording of it here. Sorry, I just
read you the transcript.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Whatever you get the point, Pratt, Spencer Pratt is taking
the Trump approach. All Trump has done to fix crime
in Washington, d C, secure the border, and launch his
mass deportation program is enforce the law.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
Wow, what a concept.
Speaker 2 (30:46):
Unlike every Democrat, every modern leftist, every Republican rhino, Trump
is taking the attitude of let's just fix this thing,
and Pratt, I guess.
Speaker 3 (30:57):
Is doing the same.
Speaker 2 (30:59):
Some right winger are now mad at Pratt because they
just discovered he's pro Israel. I don't know what that
has to do with being mayor Los Angeles. And then
they're also mad because he used to be into crystals
or something like that. Well, guess what, he'd still be
better than New York's communist mayor, a guy who promised
all kinds of free stuff he can't deliver. Pratt is
(31:20):
promising to clean up the streets merely by enforcing the law,
and you could bet the police force will be behind him.
One hundred percent because that's why they got into that
line of work. Doesn't sound that bad to me. I've
been to LA in years. It's too gross and dirty.
I hope he delivers without saying so. It seems like
(31:41):
Spencer Pratt's also pointing out how easy it is to
fix these problems, while his left wing opponents get bogged
down in housing people who don't want to be housed
and offering treatment to people who don't want to be treated.
Spencer Pratt as a candidate, it seems to understand that
(32:02):
the homeless are not law abiding families dealing with a
missed paycheck. It is a choice for many of them.
These are criminals. These are degenerate drug addicts. The safety
nets are already in place. These people don't want a
safety net. They want to get high and live in
filth in a public space. Do you want your kids
(32:25):
walking through that so they can get to public school?
Is that what you want in your neighborhood. The dog
abuse stuff really creep me out. Did you guys see
that video online recently where they're shooting up dogs with
fentanyl in the homeless encampments so they can figure out
if their drugs are any good if they want to
know if their drugs are cleaned, so they test them
(32:45):
on their dogs. Look, I think people who want help
should be given help. For a lot of these homeless people,
they don't want help. These people do not want to
be helped. We know that because plenty of help is
available to anyone who falls through the cracks.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
These days.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Life is sweet when you're on welfare. People on welfare
have a home and they have a lot more than that.
They've got heating and air conditioning. They have Netflix. They
have an iPhone. Yeah, free iPhone, I know, Obama Phone
they used to call it. Turns out it was a
program actually created by George W. Bush, but for some reason,
(33:29):
the general public game Obama credit for the free iPhones,
and he took it. People on welfare in America are fat.
They have plenty to eat. They get free medical care
that includes rehab coverage. Weirdly, that's the part they don't
care about getting. Many of them have chosen not to
(33:50):
accept the help. Instead, they want to terrorize the streets.
That's choice. So Spencer Pratt is phenomenally gifted.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
Right now.
Speaker 2 (34:03):
At explaining what's wrong with LA. I don't know that
much about his past. I didn't watch him.
Speaker 3 (34:11):
On reality TV.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
Look I don't I'm not one of these gung ho Zionist,
anti Zionist, pro Israel, anti Isid, indo Israel. I don't
have time to worry about it. I live in America.
He's not running for mayor of Jerusalem. He's running for
mayor in Los Angeles, and they need some help. Let's
just tell what he's pushing makes sense to these people.
(34:39):
I don't know if he has any chance of winning.
I don't live in LA But if Pratt does win,
his win will be based on an unapologetic conservative message
on the issues of law and order, fiscal sanity, and
taxpayer abuse. What a novel idea, that is, what a radical,
crazy idea? That is?
Speaker 3 (35:01):
Where will the homeless go? You ask?
Speaker 2 (35:02):
The only correct answer to that question is that's their problem.
You don't have to solve all the world's problems when
other people's problems are making life worse for you. Sometimes
you just got to get him out of the community.
Could you imagine an entire neighborhood where homelessness is so
bad that it's named after it. You know the rock
(35:23):
band skid Row. That's a real place that's in Maxine
Waters District.
Speaker 3 (35:29):
That's how bad it is in LA. It's a really
cute news story today about a seven year old student
in Rhode Island named Samir.
Speaker 2 (35:40):
Samir is being called a hero after saving a classmate's life.
The classmate was choking during snack time, and Samir rushed
over and performed the Heimlich maneuver as soon as he
saw the other kid choking. A seven year old save
someone's life with the Heimlich maneuver.
Speaker 3 (35:56):
That's kind of cool.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
And he had only learned it the year before in school,
which to him was probably a long time ago. Here's
Samir and his mom talking about the life saving action.
Speaker 6 (36:06):
I saw him choking. My teacher told me to calm
down and everyone sit down. She said he's gonna comfort help.
And then I came and then and did the heimat him.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
I was shocked, obviously, as a seven year old, I
don't really expect friends to know something like that.
Speaker 3 (36:22):
There was really no words that kid.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
Doesn't that warm your heart? That is just beautiful. Pray
be kind to your neighbor. Join us this Thursday night
at the Houston Improv. We're gonna have a lot of
fun doing stand up comedy this week. I hope you'll
be there. I love you all. We'll be back bright
and early tomorrow morning for more of what you bought
a radio for.
Speaker 6 (36:46):
You are listening to the Pursuit of Happiness Radio.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Tell the government to kiss you're ass when you listen
to this show, do you
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