April 24, 2026 • 37 mins
This podcast edition of Kenny Webster's Pursuit of Happiness features comedian Srsly Melissa. ( @KennethRWebster )
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Giganic government sucks. Pursuit of habbiness radio is deluxe. Liberty
and freedom will make you smile of a suit of
habbines us on your radiotyle, just as cheeseburg is liberty
fries at food.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
A construction crew in the UK has unearthed a three
hundred year old cannon. That's not the part I'm amazed by.
I'm amazed that it was still in better shape than
the average British.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Smile.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Hi, everybody, I'm Kenny Webster. Seriously, Melissa is stopping by. Seriously,
she's a comedian. I think you'll think she's funny. I
think she's funny. Well, let's start off with this, ladies
and gentlemen. Some people think the best part of a
Houston summer is a tall glass of sweet tea loaded
with ice. Well, it turns out there's an even better
kind of the one that just spent two weeks rounding
(01:02):
up two hundred and seventy seven criminal illegal aliens, including
six murderers and seven child predators. That's not enforcement, that's
spring cleaning with handcuffs, and brother Houston needed it.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
I like ice.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
I like them the way rednecks from Texas like pickup
trucks and second helpings. Unapologetically, these federal agents rolled into
Southeast Texas last month and did what local cops can't do.
They permanently removed bad guys with rap sheets longer than
I ten at rush hour. Seven hundred and fifty one convictions.
(01:40):
Six of them were straight up murderers, seven of them
were honest to godchild seventeen child predators, sixteen drug traffickers
who treat Houston like it's their own personal Amazon warehouse,
fifteen gang members who probably think MS thirteen stands for
makes stabbings great again, and don't get me started on
the sixty seven robbers and eleven hit and run artists.
(02:04):
These weren't tourists who lost their passports at the Alamo.
These were repeat offenders who'd already been deported and re
entered more times than a bad X shows up at
your family reunion. And somehow people still act shocked when
ICE does their job. Oh no, the mean Feds are here,
spare me. Without Ice, human's criminal justice system is like
(02:29):
a hotel with no checkout policy. The worst guests stay forever,
they trash the place, then they demand free breakfast. You
remember the twelve year old girl who was dumped in
a bayou last year, or the grand niece repeatedly assaulted
by a guy who'd already been kicked out, or the
MS thirteen machete enthusiasts turning parts of town into their
(02:53):
own personal horror movie film set. Guys, these aren't isolated incidents.
This is the bill coming due for years of playing
immigration roulette with public safety.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
I like ICE.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
I also usually like Mayor John Whittmeyer. The man's got
common sense more than the city council does. He talks
tough on crime, he's got that old school Democrat law
and order swagger, and he'll even support a logical Republican
if the math adds up. I respect that, but my
support ain't a blank check.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
John.
Speaker 3 (03:29):
Two weeks ago, you backed an ordinance that basically told
Houston cops, hey, don't help ICE unless the bad guy's
literally on fire. Then Governor Rabbit stepped in. He threatened
to yank one hundred and fourteen million dollars in public
safety money, and suddenly poof the ordinance got amended faster
(03:50):
than a Houston driver changes lanes without signaling. Thirteen to
four vote on April twenty second. Nice pivot, Mayor, but
next time, skip the two step and just stand with
Ice from Jump Street. We're not asking for a police state.
We're asking for police who don't have to pretend federal
law is optional. Here's the thing that drives me crazier
(04:14):
than Lena Hidalgo at a marriage counseling session. Some folks
treat sanctuary policies like they're compassionate. Compassionate for who, not
the victims, not the kids who have to share a
playground with convicted predators, who keeps slipping back across the border,
like it's a revolving door at a bad buthet. Real
(04:35):
compassion is telling the bad guys the party's over. Ice
isn't breaking up families for fun. They're removing guys who
already proved they can't be trusted with freedom on American soil.
And if a logical democrat anywhere in the South gets it,
I will support them. Law and order isn't a part
(04:55):
is an issue, it's a survival issue. Pride themselves on hospitality,
Come on in and have some tea, mind your manners,
But hospitality has limits. You don't leave the front door
wide open for people who've already demonstrated they like to
rob the silverware and assault the kids and then ask
for seconds. Ice is the polite but firm nightclub bouncer
(05:20):
who finally says, hey, time to go, fellas. It's a
one way ticket, no re entry stamp. So yeah, Houston
needs ice, Southeast Texas needs ice. The rest of the
South does too, because when the Feds actually do their job,
the rest of us get to sleep a little easier
knowing the worst of the worst. Aren't they out there
(05:41):
turning our neighborhoods into their own personal crime lab? And that,
my friends, is why I'll take that ice in my
sweet tea any day of the week. Keep things cool,
keep things safe, keep the wrong kind of guests from overstaying.
They're welcome permanently. Now pass the sugar, and while you're
at it, past the word back Ice. Hold Whitmeyer to
(06:04):
the fire when he waivers, and let's keep Houston the
kind of city where the only thing getting iced is
the bad guys.
Speaker 4 (06:11):
You're listening to Kenny Webster's Pursuit of happiness. We're everyone
is welcome to, even scum sucking maggots, swallowing socialist bastards
you used to refer to as mom is in.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
Your biopic This Weekend of Michael.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Jackson that's about to come out, and there are several
inaccuracies in it. I just watched it and I spotted
a bunch of stuff that wasn't accurate. For example, there's
several times in the biopic where they refer to him
as black.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
What wrong? I know, ish ish Yeah, what depends on
when you watch.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
Seriously, Melissa Hi, one of my favorite local comedians.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
How are you? I'm doing well, I'm doing well. How
are you?
Speaker 3 (06:55):
You're very You're the only person that's ever asked for
specific camera angles.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Is it okay? You look great? Really? You look fantastic, skinny.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Yes, you're one of my favorite local comics that you're
one of my top three local female comedians.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
I love that. And I think you're the only one
that's not a black lesbian that I love. Oh well,
look at that.
Speaker 3 (07:16):
Have you ever been to the improv I have? Black
lesbians are very good comedians. They are.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Why are they so fun? I don't know.
Speaker 5 (07:22):
I think they have a life that they A lot
of funny stuff happens with.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Them and they never feel intimidated by you. Ever, I'm not.
I'm not intimidated by you. Thank you. You shouldn't be.
I am not an intimidated person.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
No, absolutely not, not even to other radio personalities. You're
you and I met back on Valentine's Day. We were
performing in front of almost a thousand people in Montgomery County.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Still freaks me out. On a tennis court, was it
tennis or volleyball? It was all the balls. It was
a lot of balls, a lot of ball, more balls
than FIFA, more balls than Sydney Sweeney on a casting couch. Curiously,
she's a nice girl. Don't make fun Come on.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
I would never she's maga. I would never make fun
of a mega comedian.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Please don't. You're not political at all. You're not a
political all. You're Christian. I am Christian. What does a
lot of your stand up about life?
Speaker 5 (08:21):
About story? It's my life and the life that I
see around me. But really my life. I came from
a crazy home, no church, and then got churched, and
that's funny to me.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
It's really funny to me.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
One thing I do not let comedians do on this show,
and I'm not going to ask you to do it.
Some radio shows they want the com or the podcast
want comics to do their material on the show.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
I think that's so lame. It's so lame. But also
when they're.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Not, when comics are not doing their material, you get
to see who's actually funny. I know they'll come in
a lot of in this radio studio, a lot of politicians, journalists,
and comedians, And believe it or not, sometimes the comedians
are not the funniest or not.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Because when they're in the wild, there's some of them
don't want to be funny. But they're more honest, they're
more honest, they're real than politicians and journalists. I agree
they come in trying to be funny, which.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Is scary, right Right, Melissa, you and I were just
talking off the air about ath leisure, as we often are,
because I, for me, ath leisure is men's ath leisure
is so different than what women.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Wear one hundred percent. It's wrong. It's a delicate subject.
It's very delicate. We're all aware of at times.
Speaker 3 (09:32):
The state of female fashion in the twenty first century
is not always conducive to traditional Christian modesty.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Right, Yeah, that's a perfect way to say it. And
so it's so common these days for us to find
things like what would King David have said if he
wore leggings? You know, you wouldn't have been able to talk.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
So nowadays you see this sort of thing happening where
you go to the gym, you go to a park.
Women do this thing now where they wear the fabric
up there butt cracky.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
It's sinsed to it's sewn into their butt and why
is that? I don't know. What is the athletic I
tried it one time, yeah, and I couldn't get it.
I couldn't get the seam right. What do you mean
by that? Well, it was on my hip. It wouldn't
go in. It wouldn't go in, It wouldn't go into
the butt crack, wouldn't go into the butt crack, which
is where I was offended.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
If you can't get fabric in your butt crack, what's
the point of going to the church or the gym?
I mean, sorry, well it could be a gym at
a church.
Speaker 5 (10:27):
There is, yeah, I mean, just put scripture on it
and it's it's a church.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Out of it.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Unrelated to this conversation, because we will get back to it.
Is YMC a kind of an antiquated term at this point.
I don't know, young Men's Christian Alliance Association something that. Yeah,
and it was it was supposed to be a gem
for young, poor white men in the city.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Now it's everyone. Yeah, wow, everyone, we should change. I
don't think a lot of white men go to MC
at all. No, I think you're right. No, they go
to Equinox. Yeah, they go to Lifetime or EOS. So
who's going to the YMCA. I think it's everybody but
those guys. Right. Have you been to a mall lately?
Speaker 3 (11:08):
Oh my gosh, as a middle class white guy walking
around a mall, I am the only ones.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
Yes, that looks like this, same in the mall. No,
there's white women. No, what mall are you at? I
went to Willowbrook. I don't even know where that is.
That's like like Kleine Tomball Spring Area. That's a very
white part of town.
Speaker 5 (11:28):
I'm not joking. They were brown, way more brown than me.
I get that, Yeah, they were. I'm just being honest.
And that's like the mall I grew up at.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
Well, anyway, if you're anyway, if you're at the mall
looking for athleisure, where there's It has now been proposed
that somebody build a gym just for men because women
dress so inappropriately.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Now at the gym, people are saying, enough's enough. I
go to the gym to work out. I've been married
for twenty two years. I don't need to see women
dressed like they're wearing lingerie basically on the screen for
those listening on the radio. Is often the case when
I have an in studio guest. We're live streaming on
social media, so we're gonna describe what we're looking at
(12:12):
because some of our audience can't see it. Okay, so
we don't remember, don't assume, describe vividly what you're looking at.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Here.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Let's start off with this woman here. What is is
This is a woman wearing a skin tight clothing, often
is the case in a gym, skin tight. But hers
is shiny for some reason.
Speaker 5 (12:31):
Very shiny, and the and the colors are so neutral
that there's almost.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Like a nudity esque like esque. I see that, You
see what I'm getting at?
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Yeah, exactly. And then the other thing too is if
it's shiny, that makes me think the fabric's warm.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
Thought. Right, Yeah, here's a.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Great example seamless gym set, women's sports bra and underguard.
Speaker 5 (12:53):
It's and it goes up the butt craft first of all, seamless.
That's all I freaking see is a seam that's true.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
And this is one hundred and twenty four dollars, Holy
Mother of Pearl, there's.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
Not enough fabric here. Two full sets for two twenty three.
That's not a lot of fabric for twenty four bucks. There,
she's barely even covered.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Well and she I don't think she's ever worked out.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
No, or eaten for that matter. They're all very skinny.
Look at this girl. Yeah, someone's got to get that
girl a sandwich.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
A hamburger.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
We got to get her a hamburger shake. At some gyms,
she might be the hamburger. So with all that being said,
we were looking at what men wear in the gym. Yeah,
and we were looking at obviously the women's leggings are
all very tight and it goes up your butt. But
then what do men wear at the gym? Men just
basically wear a T shirt and shorts.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Usually, Yeah, that smells and it's all the same. Is
something all the same, Sometimes a tank top. Sometimes the
shirt's tight. But that's really about it rare though, that's rare.
Look at this guy's wearing a hoodie. He's wearing a
hoodie to work out. When do women wear hoodies? They don't.
It's when they walk out, when they're eating, when they're alone,
(14:02):
when they're hungover and depressed. So women wear what men
wear to work out, when they're eating ice cream on
the couch, that's right. One week a month. I have
to think women dress like men one you and yes,
for sure, and it's and it's this way with sports too,
like we were. Yeah, when men are not doing gymnastics,
the men's gymnastics team, they actually wear pants. But with women,
(14:26):
you could see like right up you can see their testimony.
You could see right up into the fallopian tube. All yep,
you can see everything.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
The uterus, all of it. You'll know if she's look
at They had to blur this one. This one had
to be blurred.
Speaker 5 (14:39):
Yeah, if you have to blur a gymnastics picture, there's
too much.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
Right exactly, you're wearing that to the gym. That's amazing.
And some of these kids are young too, but I
know it seems inappropriate to me.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
It is, and it's unfair, Like why why do the
women have to wear that in the mendo.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Let's just keep it. Let's just keep it kind of
the same. Ish. Well, Melissa, you're not gonna like when
I'm about to. I know, I know, I'm not. I
do you feel it? Do you know why you paint
your nails? Yeah, the same reason that these women on
the track team are wearing little bikini shorts. You're not
doing that for men. Do you think do you think
a guy has ever been like, oh man, did you
(15:19):
see her nails? It's not on my dating profile. It
was never on my dating profile.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
That is one for other women, which I think also
is why this is happening here. Why these women are
wearing almost nothing when they run tracks?
Speaker 5 (15:31):
I think, Okay, I have a question, Kenny, Shoot, what
do you go? Do we think that it makes them
run faster? Because no, I've ran naked and I've ran
with an entire.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
Outfit on why did you run naked? I don't want
to talk about it. Were through the quad. I just
don't want to talk about it, Kenny. But I was faster.
You can't just bring it up and then not talk
about it. Listen. I can't tell you why. But one
time I was completely naked, and I had to bury
a goat up to his throat four feed him until
an Arabic man screamed, Marco Polo, what why did this happen? Melissa?
(16:07):
I can't tell you, can't tell you. That's one of
those things. It doesn't matter. Here's what I do know.
Head on up more.
Speaker 4 (16:13):
Kenny Webster's Pursuit of Happiness A safe space for those
who love liberty and try not to take themselves too seriously.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Even if your name is Karen.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
Happy birthday to barbar streisand that you don't bring me flowers.
Singer Barber streisand turns eighty four today.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Love her.
Speaker 3 (16:32):
The next time someone brings her flowers, it may be
to put on her grave.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Could be because she's so old. Yeah, well she's old.
Do you know what the Streisand effect is? What is it?
Speaker 3 (16:42):
It's It's a term used in sociological studies to describe
what happens when someone tries to make something disappear from
the internet.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
It does not work. Years ago, like to know this
is truly Yeah, Like twenty years ago, some photographer drove
up and down the coastline of Malibu, Okay, taking photos
of the mansions, and he put pictures of it on
the internet. Okay, and Barber Streisand became aware of the
fact that there was a photo of her mansion there,
so she hired a lawyer to go and try to
take the photo down.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
Really, and because things in court are often public, whether
you want them to be or not, they say that
about six people had looked at the the image had
been viewed six times before the lawsuit, and then after
the lawsuit was filed, one hundred thousand views in a day,
millions in a week. It's called the Streisand effect. When
you try to get someone and not look at something
(17:32):
on the internet, it has the opposite.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Effect, the opposite effect. Wow.
Speaker 3 (17:35):
So I always tell comedians if they're trying to make
it in comedy and they want more people to look
at their their work, try to stop people from looking
at it.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Tell people this is not for you. This comedy's too risque.
Do not watch my comedy ever. Do not follow seriously, Melissia,
follow me, you will be sorry.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
You and I are going to be at the Improv
in Houston, coming up here and let me put it
on the screen.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
I don't know who that is. Some guy named Jesse Paton.
I think that's a that's clip art.
Speaker 3 (18:06):
Thursday, May fourteenth, we're going to be at the Houston Improv,
which is the biggest single room for comedy in Texas.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Fun It's a big room, it really is.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
And it's not as big as like a whiffle ball
court in Montgomery County at all, where we performed on
Valentine's Day, but still pretty big.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
It's not yeah, it does. It doesn't have turf, yeah,
but it's still great. Can you do comedy without astro turf?
Speaker 5 (18:31):
I'm gonna try. I wouldn't recommend it, wouldn't it's dangerous.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Do you have a dog? I do.
Speaker 3 (18:37):
I have a dog and he's really good at airports.
And the reason why is because it's funny. I live
in the city.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
I live right down the street from this radio station
in a high rise. He Milton is his name, Milton Friedman.
Oh my god, he's a little he's a Jewish bulldog.
He looks like this. Okay, he's I'm Catholic, but he's Jewish.
Oh yeah, yeah, Milton.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
And Milton is very comfortab with astro turf because it's
all he knows. He never sees real grass yeah, yeah, yeah,
real grass. How does he act in real grass?
Speaker 2 (19:06):
It would confuse him? Yeah, absolutely, he'd like, is this carpet?
I don't know what's like? Why I'm not peeing here?
But when we're at the airport, there's always some dog
that's confused. Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (19:17):
And I take Milton in there and he's like, what's
going on? Why is this dog taking so long? Just
pee on the AstroTurf. Let's go pick it up.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Just do it, just keep going. I have a dog.
His name is Bueno. You have a dog named buenoling?
Is it really? Yeah? Yeah, he's bilingual. That's great because
you're a you live in Texas. Yeah, he this is him.
I mean, this is one picture of like an he
the cute guy. Yeah, he's got big years, huge. I
like his ears, Yeah, me too, those are great. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:44):
And does he speak Spanish? I guess I assume Spanish.
You could have meant Portuguese.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Spanish is good. And he's speaks Japanese and German. He
actually he only speaks languages the act sign language. I
don't know his sign language. So he's trilingual. He speaks, he.
Speaker 3 (20:01):
Speaks imperialist Japanese fascist Italian.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
But his name's Bueno. Bueno. Well that's great. What does
Bueno eat? He eats?
Speaker 5 (20:09):
You know what he eats right now, he's just getting
into that fresh pet, you know, the real bougie, but
not really because I have to like put it on layaway.
It's so freaking expensive, but he loves it.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
My dog eats uh, it's royal canine, which is pretty
easy to find. Okay, but he eats the French bulldog.
Speaker 2 (20:28):
He ate the chihuahua one his first year of his life.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
The problem with that food is that it's what he's
supposed to eat. But if he just eats that, he
gets the hershey squirts. So I've got to give him
pumpkin puree.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
I do that every morning. Or grass.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
He'll eat grass, or for some reason, milk bones help
him with the fiber.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
I don't know why. That's good. Why do dogs are?
They're so? My dog goes to the doctor more than
I do. He has a nutritionist. He yeah.
Speaker 5 (20:56):
So, my dog just a couple months ago got a
torn ACL Like he's on a freaking basketball league, is
that right? Freaking acl take take him the dog. He's
jumping up and down going crazy like he's got a
torn ACL like Lindsay Vonn, I go, where the hell
what's he doing when I'm at work alpine skiing? I mean,
he's skiing in Colorado. So they told me that in
(21:18):
order to get it fixed, you I'd have to go
to a specialist because his ACL.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
Is this big wow, because he's a little guy, right,
sixty two hundred dollars for a new a cl No,
you don't do that. No, drag your leg, Yes, you're
going to drag it. Sorry, buddy, you're a dog. You're good.
Look at like this to.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Just be like, you know what, if you were a human, maybe,
but you're a stupid dog.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
You're a dog that licks his week. That's christ. Yeah,
you eat other dogs poop. No, it's fine, case suck,
It's okay. You could say that. Okay, Okay, does your
dog chew ice cubes? No, he's afraid of them. Has
he ever been to Canada? No? What does he think
of Rapper Drake? He loves them, He loves Drake. He
likes Drake.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
Okay, Well that's all the seguay. I've got to get
us to those. Drake, as you know, lives in two
play one of them's Houston, which is right down the
street from here. Jersey Drake in Houston, I don't all
the time. Drake, Bunbee, Slim Thug, and Dennis Rodman. I
see them all the time. Seriously, all four of these
men are a regular part of my life, and I
(22:15):
don't I could not care. Slim Thug is the nicest
of all of them. Bunbe is a good guy, but
I could care less about any of this.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
I don't listen to the Southern rap.
Speaker 5 (22:24):
Yeah, yeah, no, I don't really either, but when one
comes on and there's a good beat, I do like
move to it.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
And yes, I'm aware that Dennis Rodman's a basketball player.
I'm not a racist. Yeah, we know he lives around anyway.
Speaker 3 (22:34):
Drake in the City of Toronto put up this giant
ice structure, and.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
Why is that funny? I don't know, just so random.
It is very bizarre, so bizarre. Well, you're right, it's
really bizarre. It's a really weird thing to do.
Speaker 3 (22:50):
So he had all this ice put up, and the
City of Toronto people started doing stuff with it that
they weren't supposed to do with it. And now they've
had to take the ice down the city stepped in
and was like, no, because they're spray painting graffiti. Look,
they're lighting fires on it. We're watching a video for that.
No you're okay?
Speaker 5 (23:08):
Yeah, well I keep going like this, and I don't
want people to think I'm not paying attention.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
No, you're looking at the video. It's great. Well, describe
what we're looking at to those on the radio. I mean,
it looks like a building. It looks like the biggest
block of ice you've ever seen. Yeah. How tall is that?
You think it's got to be at least two stories high? Yeah? Yeah,
really big.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
And so he did this in downtown Toronto, and immediately,
because it's a block of ice, people started writing graffiti
on it, doing inappropriate things. His ice installation, it was
supposed to be for his new Iceman album, has really
bothered local authorities.
Speaker 5 (23:45):
Why do you think, why do you think people got
so pissed so fast?
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Well, uh, your opinion, because it's for you know, it's
odd because these are Canadians. Okay, okay, it's hard to
upset a Canadian, That's what I'm saying, right, I mean
it's almost a right.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
First of all, even if a Canadian was upset. Would
anyone care? And how would you know? You would never know,
you'd never know. We're not going to say it. They're
not the nicest people. So I'll give you one example.
Here is a white guy.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Oh yeah, this guy.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
In downtown Toronto. Let me put this on the screen here,
but I'm also going to play the audio. One man
came up and he spray painted an anti Trump thing
on the ice sculpture.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
It's only playing out of one ear. Hey, why do
you do that? Why do you do that? Why not?
We're not even in America, Bros. That we're not even
in America. Okay, it's like a wrong messaging. Wrong Please
you think? You think? Or Americans don't listen to Drake?
Speaker 3 (24:40):
I know, but he's trying to make a point. He's
spray painted f ice. But can I point out the
other thing? It's a white guy with dreadlocks. Where do
you stand at where you know? He doesn't he's not
rocking it.
Speaker 5 (24:51):
I've seen people rock it, so I'm not going to
go like totally against it.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
But he's just trying way too hard.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
I've asked every black guy I know what they think
of white kids with with dreadlocks and every black guy
I know told me Kenny stopped coming over here and asking.
I asked my best friend, who's black, his name's Imaginary,
what he thought of this, and he said he thought
it was really offensive. Black people never like white guys
(25:21):
with dreadlocks, because it looks like they're trying to here's
the funniest thing about this, And I wish I didn't
know this. Did you know the Vikings wore dreadlocks?
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Well, I've seen that.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
And why Well, because they had. I don't know why
they did it, but they just had. It's in historians
believe that Vikings actually did wear dreadlocks. It wasn't just
a black thing. Maybe because they went to Africa, I
don't know, and they didn't shower and stuff. They didn't
have the same kind of conditioner that we have. Maybe
it's easier to rape and pillage when you've got dreadlocks.
One wow, I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
I don't know. I wouldn't have gone straight there. Well
what did Vikings do? Did you? Oh? Did you think
I was making a comment about black people? No Vikings
vikingss No, black people don't.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
Do that, No, no ever, I'm ever. Yeah, we're never
gonna do the math on that in Denver. Certainly not
in Denver. Oh well, that's a good thank you for
when we get back after this. Denver has found a
way to cure Hi.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
It's incredible. All rape will end in Denver. Stick around,
we'll explain after this. If I were you, I'd stay
put Kenny.
Speaker 4 (26:28):
You'll be right back with more of what he came
for for jokes.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Rapper Lil Nazak says he is ninety nine percent gay.
I think that's another way of saying there's a one
percent chance he'll where Dockers for sure. Gotta be Yeah,
that's uh good. Does that mean that Shia lah Boof
hates him? Yeah, for sure. Do you remember like ten.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
Years ago, Shi lah Boof was considered too liberal and
like Maga, guys were at war with him on the internet.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
And now he's the homophobe of New Orleans. I don't
know a lot about that. You're not keeping up with
the news, are you. Shia Laboof keeps getting arrested in
New Orleans because he fought a drag queen or something
like that. Oh gosh, I would think, don't have sex
with the gays, And I mean, well, don't have sex
with a gay sex worker. I was gonna say, don't
don't do that either, don't fight a gay sex worker
(27:23):
because of blood board pathogens. But now I'm being transphobic.
And here's seriously, Melissa, seriously, why don't you explain the
real quick?
Speaker 3 (27:35):
Why don't you give us your take on abortion, immigration
in the Iran war?
Speaker 2 (27:39):
Any Yeah, that's enough, stop it. She's not political, not
doing it, doing it. But you're very Christian I am,
but I'm also just a real mess. Cross or crucifix, cross?
You got it? Let's see, I don't have it. It's right here.
Oh it's on your phone. I have to show it
on camera. Shout again, where is the cross? She did?
(28:01):
Why is it? Why? Why fits both fingers?
Speaker 3 (28:03):
I have to explain to the radio audience, I asked her,
for those of you listening on the radio, I wear
a crucifix, are out?
Speaker 2 (28:09):
Not a crucifix is a cross? It should be a
crucifix because I'm a you're a Catholic, because I'm the
correct religion. But okay, but regardless.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
Irregardless, what a big you know, good grammar, good religion.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Okay, anyway we go, so anyway, and then I asked, Melissa,
you know where's your where's your cross? And she said,
I don't have it on my necklace. She showed me
it's on a ring and then she held up her
middle finger. Well, it's just because it fits on both fingers.
But today, just time and I have it. I'm the
middle finger. Hey, that's great, but I love it. Jesse
wears his as a shocker if I'm not mistake, Yeah,
(28:44):
because it would shock everyone.
Speaker 3 (28:45):
You and I are going to be Thursday, May fourteenth,
We will be at the Improv. Yeah, and that's going
to be a ton of fun. That's gonna be in
the Houston Improv. That's a big comedy club. Very cool.
And one thing I am worried about while we're there.
I don't want anyone getting sexually assaulted. It's never happened
in one of our comedy shows. It's never gonna happen.
(29:06):
We're against it.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
We don't like it.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
Male on female, female on male, male on male women
on women all kin.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Now. Denver heard us, and they, the city of Denver,
said we gotta do something about this rape. We're gonna
put an end of this. Yeah, So they made a
social media post. It's a turquoise box YEP with white
letters on it, and they posted this on social media
and it just says, don't rape, don't rape, do not rape.
That's all it says. Now for some people, this is
(29:34):
going to ruin their weekend. Well, yeah, does this work?
I don't know, You know, I I don't think if
you are a rapist, yeah, I don't think. You're scrolling
Instagram and you follow Denver police.
Speaker 3 (29:51):
It seems unlikely that right before you were gonna rape,
you looked at Instagram and.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
You were like nope.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
Do you remember when Turner was the mayor of Houston,
Mayor Turner, Yeah, he was the mayor right when the
pandemic kicked in, and so one of the issues they
were having is they were saying, look, we don't have
enough comps right now to go out and fight crime
because we got to deal with the virus.
Speaker 2 (30:11):
Yeah. So that so Turner got on TV and this
is what he said. Everybody chill, crooks, criminals, you chill.
And it didn't work. It didn't know, it didn't work.
That was his message.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
If everyone could just take a break from crime for
a week while we figure out this pandemic. But nobody
wanted to listen to the mayor and the kind of
person that commits crimes probably doesn't watch it.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Mayor's Turner's pres.
Speaker 5 (30:31):
Conference's right, Like, if you would have put that on Instagram, though.
Speaker 2 (30:34):
That'd have been different. Just chill. I gotta think the
criminals are on TikTok, wouldn't you think more TikTok? Snapchat? Yeah,
if we were, Oh, snapchat, that's how sure. Well, that's
how they catch all these teachers, and that's how they
find people, which brings me.
Speaker 3 (30:47):
To my next thing we wanted to talk about today. Yeah,
in Texas, yet another teacher.
Speaker 2 (30:52):
Always Texas. It's a lot of Texas. It's not always Texas.
B I know it's I think it's anecdotal because you're
in Texas, you hear about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right,
you're right. But in Texas a Texas substitute teacher. Let me,
could you describe what we're looking at on the screen?
Tell us what does this young lady look like?
Speaker 5 (31:10):
Well, she's a blonde, yep, she's got her eyelashes done
on one eye but not the other eye. Now I
noticed that because I have woken up that way before.
Speaker 2 (31:22):
Is that how your eyelashes. Look, No, you're right, she's
only did one eye.
Speaker 5 (31:25):
Yeah, I've woken up that before because my fake eyelashes
were like on my cheek.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
Maybe she was doing her eyes maybe, but she got
arrested when the SWAT team came run here.
Speaker 6 (31:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Yeah, she looks a little I don't know, she doesn't
look she looks Asian and blonde. She looks like she's
a student. You think she's Russian.
Speaker 3 (31:43):
Her name's Angela Paul Maris. She's twenty seven. Okay, was
arrested without incident in Bell County. Well that's a release,
oh god, and charge with improper relationship between an educator
and a student.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
That's a secondary felony. She's being held on one hundred
and fifty thousand dollars bond to get her out of jail.
It's fifteen thousand bucks. She was busted after school officials
notifying police about inappropriate communications with students, specifically through a
social media platform outside of the school days. That's how
they always get them. I know it's always Snapchat because
people think their conversations on Snapchat are raised and they're not.
Speaker 3 (32:18):
No, they're not a raised at all. Do you think
the authorities haven't figured this out yet. They've got it.
Speaker 5 (32:24):
Do you think that that's the same the same like
laws for a substitute teacher gotta be Yeah, I guess so.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
But it's the same punishment, but you don't get paid
as much, you know. Yeah, so she was just taking
her chance. That's the sad thing about that.
Speaker 3 (32:38):
Adult prostitution is confusing because that's the other sex law
that always confuses me because obviously this is inappropriate, right,
But this confuses me because it's almost always a young
attractive woman, yeah right.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Like she's not ugly. No, no, no, she's not. She's not,
it's not you know, he's like, why can't you just
sleep with an adult? But then sex laws for adults
are confusing too, because sometimes U man will get arrested
for hiring a prostitute. Were he to just set up
a video camera in the corner of the room, could
say she was an actress, and then it becomes because
(33:12):
porno's legal. That's so true. You never thought about them.
I never thought about that. I will now, you know.
Now you're going to think more about how to skate
around sex. How do I get away with it? The
logic of our sex laws you're so stupid. Well, I mean, yeah,
I've got a lot to think about. One thing that
(33:35):
older men will always say when we're doing these stories
on the air is they'll always say, where were these
teachers when I was in school? They do say that
this was happening when you were in school. It wasn't
happening to you. It hapen to you. And there was
no snapchat, No, there was no way to get caught
the Instagram.
Speaker 3 (33:52):
Yeah, when you think about the consequences of social media,
one of the things you really never considered is this
is how we're going to catch the female child old
sex predators.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Because it's always a woman, I know.
Speaker 3 (34:05):
And then we have all been tricked into believing that
pedophiles are generally men.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
Yeah, turns out it's not true.
Speaker 3 (34:10):
No, because the teachers public school, it's almost always a woman.
Speaker 2 (34:14):
But there are some men teachers, Kenny, sure. Yeah, and
once in a while they get busted. I've seen it. No,
you're right, I'm just speaking about our generation. I get you,
I get you, But it's almost always a woman in these.
Speaker 5 (34:23):
Stories, You're right, especially the one that like, like has
babies and stuff with her her victim.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
But then the silver lining is we're breaking stereotypes.
Speaker 2 (34:34):
That's so good. Yeah, man, you're preaching I hate these
gender stereotypes saying it. And here's another one is the child?
What is it? The gender wage gap? The gender wage
GAP's out of control? Melissa.
Speaker 3 (34:46):
Have you ever thought about and really analyzed how much
more money women are making than men on OnlyFans?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
That's not fair?
Speaker 5 (34:52):
You know that's not fair. But did they start? Is
the first person on OnlyFans was a woman?
Speaker 2 (34:57):
I think I don't know. It's a good I mean,
we could research it. But when there's women on only
fans that claim to be making seven digits a month, yeah,
men are making seven bucks a month on OnlyFans? And
then why do you think that?
Speaker 3 (35:10):
And then and then women will look at this too,
especially feminists will look at it and they'll be like,
they'll be like, you get that money, girly, These men
are disgusting. You get their money from them. You're the
girl boss, You're the hero of this story.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
Actually the hero of the story is the men, because
they're they're the ones paying, they're the ones giving you
the money. That's right. See still, men, it is, it's tough.
Speaker 5 (35:31):
Women, won't you know what it is is women won't pay.
I don't think women will pay to watch men on
a video screen because we can get that.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
We could just go to a bar and get it
or in person. Right, I'm saying, do you know how
many strip clubs are in this town where we are? Right?
Speaker 3 (35:48):
Houston is known for because of corporate tourism, right right.
Nobody goes on vacation here, but we have more corporate
headquarters per capita than any other city in America.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
So all these people come to Houston for business?
Speaker 3 (36:00):
What do you do here? Restaurants at strip clubs. There's
nothing else to do, right, Well, they're not going to
go to Disneyland or whatever. No, and you throw a
rock in any direction, you'll hit a barbecue place, a
gun range, and.
Speaker 2 (36:09):
A strip club, and a church and a church and
a sketchy massage parlor, Oh for sure, obviously.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
And then you know everybody knows what's going on. There's
no woman who's depressed, so she takes her whole paycheck,
goes to a strip club and pays to look at
a guy do helicopters in her face. It's not happening, Melissa.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
Not happening at all. You're so right. Yeah, why is
that I.
Speaker 5 (36:33):
Don't because we don't want to pay for it, because
we can get it for free.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
Melissa, you have been a delightful guest. Oh thank you.
Speaker 3 (36:39):
We've got to run follow seriously, Melissa on social Speaking
of social media, to those of you watching us right now,
we're going to do a bonus round right now, I
see some comments in the chat. We're going to read
your comments from Michael and Dale and James and everyone else.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
To stick around join us on social media. To the
rest of you, I love you all.
Speaker 3 (36:56):
We'll be back bright and early Monday morning for more
of what you bought a radio for.
Speaker 6 (37:05):
You are listening to the Pursuit of Happiness Radio. Tell
the government to kiss your ass when you listen to
the show.
Giganic government sucks. Pursuit of habbiness radio is deluxe. Liberty
and freedom will make you smile of a suit of
habbines us on your radiotyle, just as cheeseburg is liberty
fries at food.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
A construction crew in the UK has unearthed a three
hundred year old cannon. That's not the part I'm amazed by.
I'm amazed that it was still in better shape than
the average British.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
Smile.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Hi, everybody, I'm Kenny Webster. Seriously, Melissa is stopping by. Seriously,
she's a comedian. I think you'll think she's funny. I
think she's funny. Well, let's start off with this, ladies
and gentlemen. Some people think the best part of a
Houston summer is a tall glass of sweet tea loaded
with ice. Well, it turns out there's an even better
kind of the one that just spent two weeks rounding
(01:02):
up two hundred and seventy seven criminal illegal aliens, including
six murderers and seven child predators. That's not enforcement, that's
spring cleaning with handcuffs, and brother Houston needed it.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
I like ice.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
I like them the way rednecks from Texas like pickup
trucks and second helpings. Unapologetically, these federal agents rolled into
Southeast Texas last month and did what local cops can't do.
They permanently removed bad guys with rap sheets longer than
I ten at rush hour. Seven hundred and fifty one convictions.
(01:40):
Six of them were straight up murderers, seven of them
were honest to godchild seventeen child predators, sixteen drug traffickers
who treat Houston like it's their own personal Amazon warehouse,
fifteen gang members who probably think MS thirteen stands for
makes stabbings great again, and don't get me started on
the sixty seven robbers and eleven hit and run artists.
(02:04):
These weren't tourists who lost their passports at the Alamo.
These were repeat offenders who'd already been deported and re
entered more times than a bad X shows up at
your family reunion. And somehow people still act shocked when
ICE does their job. Oh no, the mean Feds are here,
spare me. Without Ice, human's criminal justice system is like
(02:29):
a hotel with no checkout policy. The worst guests stay forever,
they trash the place, then they demand free breakfast. You
remember the twelve year old girl who was dumped in
a bayou last year, or the grand niece repeatedly assaulted
by a guy who'd already been kicked out, or the
MS thirteen machete enthusiasts turning parts of town into their
(02:53):
own personal horror movie film set. Guys, these aren't isolated incidents.
This is the bill coming due for years of playing
immigration roulette with public safety.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
I like ICE.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
I also usually like Mayor John Whittmeyer. The man's got
common sense more than the city council does. He talks
tough on crime, he's got that old school Democrat law
and order swagger, and he'll even support a logical Republican
if the math adds up. I respect that, but my
support ain't a blank check.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
John.
Speaker 3 (03:29):
Two weeks ago, you backed an ordinance that basically told
Houston cops, hey, don't help ICE unless the bad guy's
literally on fire. Then Governor Rabbit stepped in. He threatened
to yank one hundred and fourteen million dollars in public
safety money, and suddenly poof the ordinance got amended faster
(03:50):
than a Houston driver changes lanes without signaling. Thirteen to
four vote on April twenty second. Nice pivot, Mayor, but
next time, skip the two step and just stand with
Ice from Jump Street. We're not asking for a police state.
We're asking for police who don't have to pretend federal
law is optional. Here's the thing that drives me crazier
(04:14):
than Lena Hidalgo at a marriage counseling session. Some folks
treat sanctuary policies like they're compassionate. Compassionate for who, not
the victims, not the kids who have to share a
playground with convicted predators, who keeps slipping back across the border,
like it's a revolving door at a bad buthet. Real
(04:35):
compassion is telling the bad guys the party's over. Ice
isn't breaking up families for fun. They're removing guys who
already proved they can't be trusted with freedom on American soil.
And if a logical democrat anywhere in the South gets it,
I will support them. Law and order isn't a part
(04:55):
is an issue, it's a survival issue. Pride themselves on hospitality,
Come on in and have some tea, mind your manners,
But hospitality has limits. You don't leave the front door
wide open for people who've already demonstrated they like to
rob the silverware and assault the kids and then ask
for seconds. Ice is the polite but firm nightclub bouncer
(05:20):
who finally says, hey, time to go, fellas. It's a
one way ticket, no re entry stamp. So yeah, Houston
needs ice, Southeast Texas needs ice. The rest of the
South does too, because when the Feds actually do their job,
the rest of us get to sleep a little easier
knowing the worst of the worst. Aren't they out there
(05:41):
turning our neighborhoods into their own personal crime lab? And that,
my friends, is why I'll take that ice in my
sweet tea any day of the week. Keep things cool,
keep things safe, keep the wrong kind of guests from overstaying.
They're welcome permanently. Now pass the sugar, and while you're
at it, past the word back Ice. Hold Whitmeyer to
(06:04):
the fire when he waivers, and let's keep Houston the
kind of city where the only thing getting iced is
the bad guys.
Speaker 4 (06:11):
You're listening to Kenny Webster's Pursuit of happiness. We're everyone
is welcome to, even scum sucking maggots, swallowing socialist bastards
you used to refer to as mom is in.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
Your biopic This Weekend of Michael.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Jackson that's about to come out, and there are several
inaccuracies in it. I just watched it and I spotted
a bunch of stuff that wasn't accurate. For example, there's
several times in the biopic where they refer to him
as black.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
What wrong? I know, ish ish Yeah, what depends on
when you watch.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
Seriously, Melissa Hi, one of my favorite local comedians.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
How are you? I'm doing well, I'm doing well. How
are you?
Speaker 3 (06:55):
You're very You're the only person that's ever asked for
specific camera angles.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Is it okay? You look great? Really? You look fantastic, skinny.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
Yes, you're one of my favorite local comics that you're
one of my top three local female comedians.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
I love that. And I think you're the only one
that's not a black lesbian that I love. Oh well,
look at that.
Speaker 3 (07:16):
Have you ever been to the improv I have? Black
lesbians are very good comedians. They are.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Why are they so fun? I don't know.
Speaker 5 (07:22):
I think they have a life that they A lot
of funny stuff happens with.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
Them and they never feel intimidated by you. Ever, I'm not.
I'm not intimidated by you. Thank you. You shouldn't be.
I am not an intimidated person.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
No, absolutely not, not even to other radio personalities. You're
you and I met back on Valentine's Day. We were
performing in front of almost a thousand people in Montgomery County.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Still freaks me out. On a tennis court, was it
tennis or volleyball? It was all the balls. It was
a lot of balls, a lot of ball, more balls
than FIFA, more balls than Sydney Sweeney on a casting couch. Curiously,
she's a nice girl. Don't make fun Come on.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
I would never she's maga. I would never make fun
of a mega comedian.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Please don't. You're not political at all. You're not a
political all. You're Christian. I am Christian. What does a
lot of your stand up about life?
Speaker 5 (08:21):
About story? It's my life and the life that I
see around me. But really my life. I came from
a crazy home, no church, and then got churched, and
that's funny to me.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
It's really funny to me.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
One thing I do not let comedians do on this show,
and I'm not going to ask you to do it.
Some radio shows they want the com or the podcast
want comics to do their material on the show.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
I think that's so lame. It's so lame. But also
when they're.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Not, when comics are not doing their material, you get
to see who's actually funny. I know they'll come in
a lot of in this radio studio, a lot of politicians, journalists,
and comedians, And believe it or not, sometimes the comedians
are not the funniest or not.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Because when they're in the wild, there's some of them
don't want to be funny. But they're more honest, they're
more honest, they're real than politicians and journalists. I agree
they come in trying to be funny, which.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Is scary, right Right, Melissa, you and I were just
talking off the air about ath leisure, as we often are,
because I, for me, ath leisure is men's ath leisure
is so different than what women.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Wear one hundred percent. It's wrong. It's a delicate subject.
It's very delicate. We're all aware of at times.
Speaker 3 (09:32):
The state of female fashion in the twenty first century
is not always conducive to traditional Christian modesty.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Right, Yeah, that's a perfect way to say it. And
so it's so common these days for us to find
things like what would King David have said if he
wore leggings? You know, you wouldn't have been able to talk.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
So nowadays you see this sort of thing happening where
you go to the gym, you go to a park.
Women do this thing now where they wear the fabric
up there butt cracky.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
It's sinsed to it's sewn into their butt and why
is that? I don't know. What is the athletic I
tried it one time, yeah, and I couldn't get it.
I couldn't get the seam right. What do you mean
by that? Well, it was on my hip. It wouldn't
go in. It wouldn't go in, It wouldn't go into
the butt crack, wouldn't go into the butt crack, which
is where I was offended.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
If you can't get fabric in your butt crack, what's
the point of going to the church or the gym?
I mean, sorry, well it could be a gym at
a church.
Speaker 5 (10:27):
There is, yeah, I mean, just put scripture on it
and it's it's a church.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Out of it.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Unrelated to this conversation, because we will get back to it.
Is YMC a kind of an antiquated term at this point.
I don't know, young Men's Christian Alliance Association something that. Yeah,
and it was it was supposed to be a gem
for young, poor white men in the city.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Now it's everyone. Yeah, wow, everyone, we should change. I
don't think a lot of white men go to MC
at all. No, I think you're right. No, they go
to Equinox. Yeah, they go to Lifetime or EOS. So
who's going to the YMCA. I think it's everybody but
those guys. Right. Have you been to a mall lately?
Speaker 3 (11:08):
Oh my gosh, as a middle class white guy walking
around a mall, I am the only ones.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
Yes, that looks like this, same in the mall. No,
there's white women. No, what mall are you at? I
went to Willowbrook. I don't even know where that is.
That's like like Kleine Tomball Spring Area. That's a very
white part of town.
Speaker 5 (11:28):
I'm not joking. They were brown, way more brown than me.
I get that, Yeah, they were. I'm just being honest.
And that's like the mall I grew up at.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
Well, anyway, if you're anyway, if you're at the mall
looking for athleisure, where there's It has now been proposed
that somebody build a gym just for men because women
dress so inappropriately.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Now at the gym, people are saying, enough's enough. I
go to the gym to work out. I've been married
for twenty two years. I don't need to see women
dressed like they're wearing lingerie basically on the screen for
those listening on the radio. Is often the case when
I have an in studio guest. We're live streaming on
social media, so we're gonna describe what we're looking at
(12:12):
because some of our audience can't see it. Okay, so
we don't remember, don't assume, describe vividly what you're looking at.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Here.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Let's start off with this woman here. What is is
This is a woman wearing a skin tight clothing, often
is the case in a gym, skin tight. But hers
is shiny for some reason.
Speaker 5 (12:31):
Very shiny, and the and the colors are so neutral
that there's almost.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Like a nudity esque like esque. I see that, You
see what I'm getting at?
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Yeah, exactly. And then the other thing too is if
it's shiny, that makes me think the fabric's warm.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
Thought. Right, Yeah, here's a.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Great example seamless gym set, women's sports bra and underguard.
Speaker 5 (12:53):
It's and it goes up the butt craft first of all, seamless.
That's all I freaking see is a seam that's true.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
And this is one hundred and twenty four dollars, Holy
Mother of Pearl, there's.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
Not enough fabric here. Two full sets for two twenty three.
That's not a lot of fabric for twenty four bucks. There,
she's barely even covered.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Well and she I don't think she's ever worked out.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
No, or eaten for that matter. They're all very skinny.
Look at this girl. Yeah, someone's got to get that
girl a sandwich.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
A hamburger.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
We got to get her a hamburger shake. At some gyms,
she might be the hamburger. So with all that being said,
we were looking at what men wear in the gym. Yeah,
and we were looking at obviously the women's leggings are
all very tight and it goes up your butt. But
then what do men wear at the gym? Men just
basically wear a T shirt and shorts.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Usually, Yeah, that smells and it's all the same. Is
something all the same, Sometimes a tank top. Sometimes the
shirt's tight. But that's really about it rare though, that's rare.
Look at this guy's wearing a hoodie. He's wearing a
hoodie to work out. When do women wear hoodies? They don't.
It's when they walk out, when they're eating, when they're alone,
(14:02):
when they're hungover and depressed. So women wear what men
wear to work out, when they're eating ice cream on
the couch, that's right. One week a month. I have
to think women dress like men one you and yes,
for sure, and it's and it's this way with sports too,
like we were. Yeah, when men are not doing gymnastics,
the men's gymnastics team, they actually wear pants. But with women,
(14:26):
you could see like right up you can see their testimony.
You could see right up into the fallopian tube. All yep,
you can see everything.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
The uterus, all of it. You'll know if she's look
at They had to blur this one. This one had
to be blurred.
Speaker 5 (14:39):
Yeah, if you have to blur a gymnastics picture, there's
too much.
Speaker 2 (14:44):
Right exactly, you're wearing that to the gym. That's amazing.
And some of these kids are young too, but I
know it seems inappropriate to me.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
It is, and it's unfair, Like why why do the
women have to wear that in the mendo.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Let's just keep it. Let's just keep it kind of
the same. Ish. Well, Melissa, you're not gonna like when
I'm about to. I know, I know, I'm not. I
do you feel it? Do you know why you paint
your nails? Yeah, the same reason that these women on
the track team are wearing little bikini shorts. You're not
doing that for men. Do you think do you think
a guy has ever been like, oh man, did you
(15:19):
see her nails? It's not on my dating profile. It
was never on my dating profile.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
That is one for other women, which I think also
is why this is happening here. Why these women are
wearing almost nothing when they run tracks?
Speaker 5 (15:31):
I think, Okay, I have a question, Kenny, Shoot, what
do you go? Do we think that it makes them
run faster? Because no, I've ran naked and I've ran
with an entire.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
Outfit on why did you run naked? I don't want
to talk about it. Were through the quad. I just
don't want to talk about it, Kenny. But I was faster.
You can't just bring it up and then not talk
about it. Listen. I can't tell you why. But one
time I was completely naked, and I had to bury
a goat up to his throat four feed him until
an Arabic man screamed, Marco Polo, what why did this happen? Melissa?
(16:07):
I can't tell you, can't tell you. That's one of
those things. It doesn't matter. Here's what I do know.
Head on up more.
Speaker 4 (16:13):
Kenny Webster's Pursuit of Happiness A safe space for those
who love liberty and try not to take themselves too seriously.
Speaker 2 (16:21):
Even if your name is Karen.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
Happy birthday to barbar streisand that you don't bring me flowers.
Singer Barber streisand turns eighty four today.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Love her.
Speaker 3 (16:32):
The next time someone brings her flowers, it may be
to put on her grave.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Could be because she's so old. Yeah, well she's old.
Do you know what the Streisand effect is? What is it?
Speaker 3 (16:42):
It's It's a term used in sociological studies to describe
what happens when someone tries to make something disappear from
the internet.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
It does not work. Years ago, like to know this
is truly Yeah, Like twenty years ago, some photographer drove
up and down the coastline of Malibu, Okay, taking photos
of the mansions, and he put pictures of it on
the internet. Okay, and Barber Streisand became aware of the
fact that there was a photo of her mansion there,
so she hired a lawyer to go and try to
take the photo down.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
Really, and because things in court are often public, whether
you want them to be or not, they say that
about six people had looked at the the image had
been viewed six times before the lawsuit, and then after
the lawsuit was filed, one hundred thousand views in a day,
millions in a week. It's called the Streisand effect. When
you try to get someone and not look at something
(17:32):
on the internet, it has the opposite.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Effect, the opposite effect. Wow.
Speaker 3 (17:35):
So I always tell comedians if they're trying to make
it in comedy and they want more people to look
at their their work, try to stop people from looking
at it.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Tell people this is not for you. This comedy's too risque.
Do not watch my comedy ever. Do not follow seriously, Melissia,
follow me, you will be sorry.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
You and I are going to be at the Improv
in Houston, coming up here and let me put it
on the screen.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
I don't know who that is. Some guy named Jesse Paton.
I think that's a that's clip art.
Speaker 3 (18:06):
Thursday, May fourteenth, we're going to be at the Houston Improv,
which is the biggest single room for comedy in Texas.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Fun It's a big room, it really is.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
And it's not as big as like a whiffle ball
court in Montgomery County at all, where we performed on
Valentine's Day, but still pretty big.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
It's not yeah, it does. It doesn't have turf, yeah,
but it's still great. Can you do comedy without astro turf?
Speaker 5 (18:31):
I'm gonna try. I wouldn't recommend it, wouldn't it's dangerous.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Do you have a dog? I do.
Speaker 3 (18:37):
I have a dog and he's really good at airports.
And the reason why is because it's funny. I live
in the city.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
I live right down the street from this radio station
in a high rise. He Milton is his name, Milton Friedman.
Oh my god, he's a little he's a Jewish bulldog.
He looks like this. Okay, he's I'm Catholic, but he's Jewish.
Oh yeah, yeah, Milton.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
And Milton is very comfortab with astro turf because it's
all he knows. He never sees real grass yeah, yeah, yeah,
real grass. How does he act in real grass?
Speaker 2 (19:06):
It would confuse him? Yeah, absolutely, he'd like, is this carpet?
I don't know what's like? Why I'm not peeing here?
But when we're at the airport, there's always some dog
that's confused. Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (19:17):
And I take Milton in there and he's like, what's
going on? Why is this dog taking so long? Just
pee on the AstroTurf. Let's go pick it up.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Just do it, just keep going. I have a dog.
His name is Bueno. You have a dog named buenoling?
Is it really? Yeah? Yeah, he's bilingual. That's great because
you're a you live in Texas. Yeah, he this is him.
I mean, this is one picture of like an he
the cute guy. Yeah, he's got big years, huge. I
like his ears, Yeah, me too, those are great. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:44):
And does he speak Spanish? I guess I assume Spanish.
You could have meant Portuguese.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Spanish is good. And he's speaks Japanese and German. He
actually he only speaks languages the act sign language. I
don't know his sign language. So he's trilingual. He speaks, he.
Speaker 3 (20:01):
Speaks imperialist Japanese fascist Italian.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
But his name's Bueno. Bueno. Well that's great. What does
Bueno eat? He eats?
Speaker 5 (20:09):
You know what he eats right now, he's just getting
into that fresh pet, you know, the real bougie, but
not really because I have to like put it on layaway.
It's so freaking expensive, but he loves it.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
My dog eats uh, it's royal canine, which is pretty
easy to find. Okay, but he eats the French bulldog.
Speaker 2 (20:28):
He ate the chihuahua one his first year of his life.
Speaker 3 (20:32):
The problem with that food is that it's what he's
supposed to eat. But if he just eats that, he
gets the hershey squirts. So I've got to give him
pumpkin puree.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
I do that every morning. Or grass.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
He'll eat grass, or for some reason, milk bones help
him with the fiber.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
I don't know why. That's good. Why do dogs are?
They're so? My dog goes to the doctor more than
I do. He has a nutritionist. He yeah.
Speaker 5 (20:56):
So, my dog just a couple months ago got a
torn ACL Like he's on a freaking basketball league, is
that right? Freaking acl take take him the dog. He's
jumping up and down going crazy like he's got a
torn ACL like Lindsay Vonn, I go, where the hell
what's he doing when I'm at work alpine skiing? I mean,
he's skiing in Colorado. So they told me that in
(21:18):
order to get it fixed, you I'd have to go
to a specialist because his ACL.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
Is this big wow, because he's a little guy, right,
sixty two hundred dollars for a new a cl No,
you don't do that. No, drag your leg, Yes, you're
going to drag it. Sorry, buddy, you're a dog. You're good.
Look at like this to.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Just be like, you know what, if you were a human, maybe,
but you're a stupid dog.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
You're a dog that licks his week. That's christ. Yeah,
you eat other dogs poop. No, it's fine, case suck,
It's okay. You could say that. Okay, Okay, does your
dog chew ice cubes? No, he's afraid of them. Has
he ever been to Canada? No? What does he think
of Rapper Drake? He loves them, He loves Drake. He
likes Drake.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
Okay, Well that's all the seguay. I've got to get
us to those. Drake, as you know, lives in two
play one of them's Houston, which is right down the
street from here. Jersey Drake in Houston, I don't all
the time. Drake, Bunbee, Slim Thug, and Dennis Rodman. I
see them all the time. Seriously, all four of these
men are a regular part of my life, and I
(22:15):
don't I could not care. Slim Thug is the nicest
of all of them. Bunbe is a good guy, but
I could care less about any of this.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
I don't listen to the Southern rap.
Speaker 5 (22:24):
Yeah, yeah, no, I don't really either, but when one
comes on and there's a good beat, I do like
move to it.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
And yes, I'm aware that Dennis Rodman's a basketball player.
I'm not a racist. Yeah, we know he lives around anyway.
Speaker 3 (22:34):
Drake in the City of Toronto put up this giant
ice structure, and.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
Why is that funny? I don't know, just so random.
It is very bizarre, so bizarre. Well, you're right, it's
really bizarre. It's a really weird thing to do.
Speaker 3 (22:50):
So he had all this ice put up, and the
City of Toronto people started doing stuff with it that
they weren't supposed to do with it. And now they've
had to take the ice down the city stepped in
and was like, no, because they're spray painting graffiti. Look,
they're lighting fires on it. We're watching a video for that.
No you're okay?
Speaker 5 (23:08):
Yeah, well I keep going like this, and I don't
want people to think I'm not paying attention.
Speaker 2 (23:12):
No, you're looking at the video. It's great. Well, describe
what we're looking at to those on the radio. I mean,
it looks like a building. It looks like the biggest
block of ice you've ever seen. Yeah. How tall is that?
You think it's got to be at least two stories high? Yeah? Yeah,
really big.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
And so he did this in downtown Toronto, and immediately,
because it's a block of ice, people started writing graffiti
on it, doing inappropriate things. His ice installation, it was
supposed to be for his new Iceman album, has really
bothered local authorities.
Speaker 5 (23:45):
Why do you think, why do you think people got
so pissed so fast?
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Well, uh, your opinion, because it's for you know, it's
odd because these are Canadians. Okay, okay, it's hard to
upset a Canadian, That's what I'm saying, right, I mean
it's almost a right.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
First of all, even if a Canadian was upset. Would
anyone care? And how would you know? You would never know,
you'd never know. We're not going to say it. They're
not the nicest people. So I'll give you one example.
Here is a white guy.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Oh yeah, this guy.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
In downtown Toronto. Let me put this on the screen here,
but I'm also going to play the audio. One man
came up and he spray painted an anti Trump thing
on the ice sculpture.
Speaker 2 (24:24):
It's only playing out of one ear. Hey, why do
you do that? Why do you do that? Why not?
We're not even in America, Bros. That we're not even
in America. Okay, it's like a wrong messaging. Wrong Please
you think? You think? Or Americans don't listen to Drake?
Speaker 3 (24:40):
I know, but he's trying to make a point. He's
spray painted f ice. But can I point out the
other thing? It's a white guy with dreadlocks. Where do
you stand at where you know? He doesn't he's not
rocking it.
Speaker 5 (24:51):
I've seen people rock it, so I'm not going to
go like totally against it.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
But he's just trying way too hard.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
I've asked every black guy I know what they think
of white kids with with dreadlocks and every black guy
I know told me Kenny stopped coming over here and asking.
I asked my best friend, who's black, his name's Imaginary,
what he thought of this, and he said he thought
it was really offensive. Black people never like white guys
(25:21):
with dreadlocks, because it looks like they're trying to here's
the funniest thing about this, And I wish I didn't
know this. Did you know the Vikings wore dreadlocks?
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Well, I've seen that.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
And why Well, because they had. I don't know why
they did it, but they just had. It's in historians
believe that Vikings actually did wear dreadlocks. It wasn't just
a black thing. Maybe because they went to Africa, I
don't know, and they didn't shower and stuff. They didn't
have the same kind of conditioner that we have. Maybe
it's easier to rape and pillage when you've got dreadlocks.
One wow, I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (25:53):
I don't know. I wouldn't have gone straight there. Well
what did Vikings do? Did you? Oh? Did you think
I was making a comment about black people? No Vikings
vikingss No, black people don't.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
Do that, No, no ever, I'm ever. Yeah, we're never
gonna do the math on that in Denver. Certainly not
in Denver. Oh well, that's a good thank you for
when we get back after this. Denver has found a
way to cure Hi.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
It's incredible. All rape will end in Denver. Stick around,
we'll explain after this. If I were you, I'd stay
put Kenny.
Speaker 4 (26:28):
You'll be right back with more of what he came
for for jokes.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Rapper Lil Nazak says he is ninety nine percent gay.
I think that's another way of saying there's a one
percent chance he'll where Dockers for sure. Gotta be Yeah,
that's uh good. Does that mean that Shia lah Boof
hates him? Yeah, for sure. Do you remember like ten.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
Years ago, Shi lah Boof was considered too liberal and
like Maga, guys were at war with him on the internet.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
And now he's the homophobe of New Orleans. I don't
know a lot about that. You're not keeping up with
the news, are you. Shia Laboof keeps getting arrested in
New Orleans because he fought a drag queen or something
like that. Oh gosh, I would think, don't have sex
with the gays, And I mean, well, don't have sex
with a gay sex worker. I was gonna say, don't
don't do that either, don't fight a gay sex worker
(27:23):
because of blood board pathogens. But now I'm being transphobic.
And here's seriously, Melissa, seriously, why don't you explain the
real quick?
Speaker 3 (27:35):
Why don't you give us your take on abortion, immigration
in the Iran war?
Speaker 2 (27:39):
Any Yeah, that's enough, stop it. She's not political, not
doing it, doing it. But you're very Christian I am,
but I'm also just a real mess. Cross or crucifix, cross?
You got it? Let's see, I don't have it. It's right here.
Oh it's on your phone. I have to show it
on camera. Shout again, where is the cross? She did?
(28:01):
Why is it? Why? Why fits both fingers?
Speaker 3 (28:03):
I have to explain to the radio audience, I asked her,
for those of you listening on the radio, I wear
a crucifix, are out?
Speaker 2 (28:09):
Not a crucifix is a cross? It should be a
crucifix because I'm a you're a Catholic, because I'm the
correct religion. But okay, but regardless.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
Irregardless, what a big you know, good grammar, good religion.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Okay, anyway we go, so anyway, and then I asked, Melissa,
you know where's your where's your cross? And she said,
I don't have it on my necklace. She showed me
it's on a ring and then she held up her
middle finger. Well, it's just because it fits on both fingers.
But today, just time and I have it. I'm the
middle finger. Hey, that's great, but I love it. Jesse
wears his as a shocker if I'm not mistake, Yeah,
(28:44):
because it would shock everyone.
Speaker 3 (28:45):
You and I are going to be Thursday, May fourteenth,
We will be at the Improv. Yeah, and that's going
to be a ton of fun. That's gonna be in
the Houston Improv. That's a big comedy club. Very cool.
And one thing I am worried about while we're there.
I don't want anyone getting sexually assaulted. It's never happened
in one of our comedy shows. It's never gonna happen.
(29:06):
We're against it.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
We don't like it.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
Male on female, female on male, male on male women
on women all kin.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Now. Denver heard us, and they, the city of Denver,
said we gotta do something about this rape. We're gonna
put an end of this. Yeah, So they made a
social media post. It's a turquoise box YEP with white
letters on it, and they posted this on social media
and it just says, don't rape, don't rape, do not rape.
That's all it says. Now for some people, this is
(29:34):
going to ruin their weekend. Well, yeah, does this work?
I don't know, You know, I I don't think if
you are a rapist, yeah, I don't think. You're scrolling
Instagram and you follow Denver police.
Speaker 3 (29:51):
It seems unlikely that right before you were gonna rape,
you looked at Instagram and.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
You were like nope.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
Do you remember when Turner was the mayor of Houston,
Mayor Turner, Yeah, he was the mayor right when the
pandemic kicked in, and so one of the issues they
were having is they were saying, look, we don't have
enough comps right now to go out and fight crime
because we got to deal with the virus.
Speaker 2 (30:11):
Yeah. So that so Turner got on TV and this
is what he said. Everybody chill, crooks, criminals, you chill.
And it didn't work. It didn't know, it didn't work.
That was his message.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
If everyone could just take a break from crime for
a week while we figure out this pandemic. But nobody
wanted to listen to the mayor and the kind of
person that commits crimes probably doesn't watch it.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Mayor's Turner's pres.
Speaker 5 (30:31):
Conference's right, Like, if you would have put that on Instagram, though.
Speaker 2 (30:34):
That'd have been different. Just chill. I gotta think the
criminals are on TikTok, wouldn't you think more TikTok? Snapchat? Yeah,
if we were, Oh, snapchat, that's how sure. Well, that's
how they catch all these teachers, and that's how they
find people, which brings me.
Speaker 3 (30:47):
To my next thing we wanted to talk about today. Yeah,
in Texas, yet another teacher.
Speaker 2 (30:52):
Always Texas. It's a lot of Texas. It's not always Texas.
B I know it's I think it's anecdotal because you're
in Texas, you hear about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right,
you're right. But in Texas a Texas substitute teacher. Let me,
could you describe what we're looking at on the screen?
Tell us what does this young lady look like?
Speaker 5 (31:10):
Well, she's a blonde, yep, she's got her eyelashes done
on one eye but not the other eye. Now I
noticed that because I have woken up that way before.
Speaker 2 (31:22):
Is that how your eyelashes. Look, No, you're right, she's
only did one eye.
Speaker 5 (31:25):
Yeah, I've woken up that before because my fake eyelashes
were like on my cheek.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
Maybe she was doing her eyes maybe, but she got
arrested when the SWAT team came run here.
Speaker 6 (31:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Yeah, she looks a little I don't know, she doesn't
look she looks Asian and blonde. She looks like she's
a student. You think she's Russian.
Speaker 3 (31:43):
Her name's Angela Paul Maris. She's twenty seven. Okay, was
arrested without incident in Bell County. Well that's a release,
oh god, and charge with improper relationship between an educator
and a student.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
That's a secondary felony. She's being held on one hundred
and fifty thousand dollars bond to get her out of jail.
It's fifteen thousand bucks. She was busted after school officials
notifying police about inappropriate communications with students, specifically through a
social media platform outside of the school days. That's how
they always get them. I know it's always Snapchat because
people think their conversations on Snapchat are raised and they're not.
Speaker 3 (32:18):
No, they're not a raised at all. Do you think
the authorities haven't figured this out yet. They've got it.
Speaker 5 (32:24):
Do you think that that's the same the same like
laws for a substitute teacher gotta be Yeah, I guess so.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
But it's the same punishment, but you don't get paid
as much, you know. Yeah, so she was just taking
her chance. That's the sad thing about that.
Speaker 3 (32:38):
Adult prostitution is confusing because that's the other sex law
that always confuses me because obviously this is inappropriate, right,
But this confuses me because it's almost always a young
attractive woman, yeah right.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Like she's not ugly. No, no, no, she's not. She's not,
it's not you know, he's like, why can't you just
sleep with an adult? But then sex laws for adults
are confusing too, because sometimes U man will get arrested
for hiring a prostitute. Were he to just set up
a video camera in the corner of the room, could
say she was an actress, and then it becomes because
(33:12):
porno's legal. That's so true. You never thought about them.
I never thought about that. I will now, you know.
Now you're going to think more about how to skate
around sex. How do I get away with it? The
logic of our sex laws you're so stupid. Well, I mean, yeah,
I've got a lot to think about. One thing that
(33:35):
older men will always say when we're doing these stories
on the air is they'll always say, where were these
teachers when I was in school? They do say that
this was happening when you were in school. It wasn't
happening to you. It hapen to you. And there was
no snapchat, No, there was no way to get caught
the Instagram.
Speaker 3 (33:52):
Yeah, when you think about the consequences of social media,
one of the things you really never considered is this
is how we're going to catch the female child old
sex predators.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Because it's always a woman, I know.
Speaker 3 (34:05):
And then we have all been tricked into believing that
pedophiles are generally men.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
Yeah, turns out it's not true.
Speaker 3 (34:10):
No, because the teachers public school, it's almost always a woman.
Speaker 2 (34:14):
But there are some men teachers, Kenny, sure. Yeah, and
once in a while they get busted. I've seen it. No,
you're right, I'm just speaking about our generation. I get you,
I get you, But it's almost always a woman in these.
Speaker 5 (34:23):
Stories, You're right, especially the one that like, like has
babies and stuff with her her victim.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
But then the silver lining is we're breaking stereotypes.
Speaker 2 (34:34):
That's so good. Yeah, man, you're preaching I hate these
gender stereotypes saying it. And here's another one is the child?
What is it? The gender wage gap? The gender wage
GAP's out of control? Melissa.
Speaker 3 (34:46):
Have you ever thought about and really analyzed how much
more money women are making than men on OnlyFans?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
That's not fair?
Speaker 5 (34:52):
You know that's not fair. But did they start? Is
the first person on OnlyFans was a woman?
Speaker 2 (34:57):
I think I don't know. It's a good I mean,
we could research it. But when there's women on only
fans that claim to be making seven digits a month, yeah,
men are making seven bucks a month on OnlyFans? And
then why do you think that?
Speaker 3 (35:10):
And then and then women will look at this too,
especially feminists will look at it and they'll be like,
they'll be like, you get that money, girly, These men
are disgusting. You get their money from them. You're the
girl boss, You're the hero of this story.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
Actually the hero of the story is the men, because
they're they're the ones paying, they're the ones giving you
the money. That's right. See still, men, it is, it's tough.
Speaker 5 (35:31):
Women, won't you know what it is is women won't pay.
I don't think women will pay to watch men on
a video screen because we can get that.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
We could just go to a bar and get it
or in person. Right, I'm saying, do you know how
many strip clubs are in this town where we are? Right?
Speaker 3 (35:48):
Houston is known for because of corporate tourism, right right.
Nobody goes on vacation here, but we have more corporate
headquarters per capita than any other city in America.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
So all these people come to Houston for business?
Speaker 3 (36:00):
What do you do here? Restaurants at strip clubs. There's
nothing else to do, right, Well, they're not going to
go to Disneyland or whatever. No, and you throw a
rock in any direction, you'll hit a barbecue place, a
gun range, and.
Speaker 2 (36:09):
A strip club, and a church and a church and
a sketchy massage parlor, Oh for sure, obviously.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
And then you know everybody knows what's going on. There's
no woman who's depressed, so she takes her whole paycheck,
goes to a strip club and pays to look at
a guy do helicopters in her face. It's not happening, Melissa.
Speaker 2 (36:29):
Not happening at all. You're so right. Yeah, why is
that I.
Speaker 5 (36:33):
Don't because we don't want to pay for it, because
we can get it for free.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
Melissa, you have been a delightful guest. Oh thank you.
Speaker 3 (36:39):
We've got to run follow seriously, Melissa on social Speaking
of social media, to those of you watching us right now,
we're going to do a bonus round right now, I
see some comments in the chat. We're going to read
your comments from Michael and Dale and James and everyone else.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
To stick around join us on social media. To the
rest of you, I love you all.
Speaker 3 (36:56):
We'll be back bright and early Monday morning for more
of what you bought a radio for.
Speaker 6 (37:05):
You are listening to the Pursuit of Happiness Radio. Tell
the government to kiss your ass when you listen to
the show.
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