November 15, 2022 • 24 mins
In this episode we discuss how we are currently feeling in our Walk with the Lord. We give you a real in-depth look into the life of Christian dealing with everyday struggles. Can you relate to any of this? Let us know your thoughts.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hey to everyone, and thank youfor listening to this week's episode. My
name is Valencia and my name isKia, and this is the Truth Diarist.
This podcast has been brought to youby Way of Truth Evangelistic Ministries.
Our hope is to see people gainhope for their future, establish their faith
in God, and build upon theirfoundation in Christ. We share our personal
struggles, trials, and thoughts aswe navigate on this faith journey with Jesus
(00:23):
Christ. So today we're going tobe kind of talking about what our experiences
have been thus this far, justto give our listeners and our viewers perhaps
some insight on things that are goingon with us personally, maybe even with
the ministry Way of Truth Evangelistic Ministries, and ask Christians, you know,
(00:49):
because the purpose of this podcast isto first and foremost glorify God and also
hopefully to let our listeners know thatthey're not alone in this journey called life,
especially not in this journey with JesusChrist. So there's a lot of
ebbs and flows up and downs becauseof life, but there is a steady,
(01:10):
constant stream of hope and peace thatwe have in Him. So we're
going to get into a nice littlediscussion. But before we do, I
want to pray right now. DearHeavenly Father, we thank you for allowing
us to be here, Father God, to fellowship with one another. Lord.
We pray that our hearts and mindsbe open and receptive to what you
are doing today, what you say, Lord, and help us to live
(01:34):
obedient lives unto you, Father God. We pray that every listener and every
viewer today that is listening to thispodcast, Lord, will be blessed.
Lord. We pray that Lord God, you will also open their hearts in
their minds, God, change themwhere they need to be changed, Lord,
and bring yourself glory in the process. Father God, we thank you,
and we love and praise you inJesus name. We pray Amen.
(01:57):
So too, has been a yearunlike any other? How has this year
impacted your future? Outlook and walkwith the Lord? So twenty twenty two
has definitely been a tough year forme so far? Just a little background
formation. So I have. Ihave this new job that I'm working at
(02:22):
as in as in my field.It Suddenly I've been praying for a while
for a while now, since Istarted studying in accounting in school. I
wanted a job that you know,was in my field, and you know,
I kept getting you know, allthese different jobs that had nothing to
do with you know, what Ihad went to school with. So you
(02:45):
know, I remember just praying allthe time, you know, for you
know, God to help to putme in a position where I'm able to
you know, apply for a job, inspect old or or or get into
that particular job. And you know, now I have that job, and
you know, it's still not it'sstill not you know, as f feeling
(03:09):
as I thought, you know,and I'm also then we go home.
You know, I'm living at home, uh with my parents, and I
know those of you out there whoare adults who who are living at home,
uh y, you know the strugglethat that could be. And so
(03:29):
I'm at a point now where notwhere I think I should be at work
were at home. You know,I've been wanting, you know, to
get my own place, just toget that independence, uh and just a
job where you know, I feellike I'm making an impact or you know,
(03:54):
helping those out. Because I've alwayswanted to do a county. I
I love doing a county, butit was always because I wanted to help
those out there that might be strugglingwith finances and things of that nature.
It was never really you know,being at a firm and at office and
(04:16):
you know, just you know,kind of doing the same thing every day.
So right now I'm at a pointwhere you know, I'm just floating.
You know, I'm going I goto work because I feel like this
is where God wants me to be. And you know, I go home
and you know, try to tryto be content there bit, but really,
(04:42):
you know, I'm not content ateither. And it does, you
know, put an impact on yourfuture outlook and you know, walk with
the Lord, because when you're justfloating through or you just feel like,
well, this is where God wantsme to be, maybe you don't well
I would say, man, don'tpray as much as you should, don't
(05:03):
study as much, don't read becausenot to it sounds bad, but you
don't, you know, really feellike it. You f you know,
uh, reading you or or prayingor studying as much. You know,
you gotta just fall into like apattern. And you know it's not depression
(05:26):
because I never lost I I don'tlose ho. I I haven't lost hope
as long as God is with me, and I know he's there. I
never get to a point where I'velost or hope. I don't think things
can get better or you know,he can't uh turn things around and point
me back in the right position ifI'm not. So it's not the it's
(05:48):
not to that point. I Iwill never get to that point a again
as long as I have God.So, but it's definitely, uh a
struggle, you know, every daytrying to be uh try to be content
and trying to you know, justget through get through today, and wondering,
(06:15):
you know, is this where I'msupposed to be? You know,
is this where you know, reallywhere God wants to be and make construct
my attitudes right? And you know, getting up and praying more because I'm
not gonna get out of uh thisthinking or that's wrong without God, you
know. So I know that Ihave to pray. I know that I
have to continue to re read myword I and you know, and study
(06:36):
it community and communicate with God becauseyou know, he's the only one that
could help me. You know,I could tell you guys and and my
friend, but ultimately, if I'mnot where I'm supposed to be, the
only person that can put me whereI'm supposed to be is God. Uh
So I dobe that I have togo to him to kind of get these
(07:00):
answers. And I have been andyou know, I'm you know, I'm
still here. I haven't got thatanswer yet that this is where I'm supposed
to be and I'm doing everything hewants me to do at this moment.
So and you know, until Iuntil I do, I'm just you know,
being trying to be contend you knowwhere I'm at. So it definitely
(07:30):
has impacted my my walk. Iwould say, I would say it's more
like up and down at this pointbecause like I said, I'm not consistent
and doing what I'm supposed to doas far as praying and and reading my
word. As far as the future, there's so hope there that you know,
(07:54):
if this is not where I'm supposedto be, that I'm gonna get
there, that He's gonna help meget to where I'm supposed to be,
and that you know, things willget better even if I'm in it's this
same position that things will get better. And I think the what's what's really
m making me struggle? I feellike this is not where I'm supposed to
(08:16):
be is because you know, mypassion right now is uh ministry, you
know, in helping people. Andreally that's what's giving me the most,
the most happiness is when I'm workingon ministry, when we're out there preaching
(08:37):
the gospel, where we're no buildinga website or or putting the Boo book
out or you know, setting upa table, going evangelizing, that's what
brings me the most passion. Andbe honest with you, I would like
to do that every day, youknow. It ever seems like work and
(08:58):
nothing else s uh. Of coursebesides God brings me that that passion,
but I have to figure out away to or n not me. That's
the problem. I don't have tofigure out a way. I have to
keep praying that God helps me whereI'm at currently. So I am content
(09:24):
with what I'm doing right now becauseI feel like, no, I wouldn't
have got this sh I wouldn't havegot to shot without God. So obviously
this is where he wants me tobe a rather it's for a lesson or
whatever it is. I feel likeI'm where I'm supposed to be and until
I get you know, my attituderight, I don't feel like I'm gonna
(09:45):
move to that next step. Sothat's currently what I feeling now. As
far as you know my relationship andhow it's impacting my uh my future outlook
and my relationship, it's just strugglingto be contad in my current situation.
(10:11):
Hi everybody, this is Nikia,the co host of The Truth Diary's podcast,
my ministry partner and co host Valencia, and I wanna thank you for
checking out our podcast. If youhave missed any episodes, feel free to
go on Apple Podcasts or any platformyou get your podcasts. We wanna thank
you for your ongoing support and prayersas we continue to speak truth and encourage
(10:31):
others. There's our passion to beable to proclaim God's words in the world.
Proclaiming the Gospel is the very heartbeatof Way of Truth evangelistic ministries,
and it is our passion in lifeto help Christians discover the next crucial steps
in their walk with the Lord.We hope that this ministry gives insight into
those steps and also provides a richermeeting and explanation on why having a strong
(10:52):
and effective personal relationship with the Lordis important. Well Valencia. I wouldn't
really say that there is one aspectof my life that I feel discouraged about.
I would say my entire life atthis point in time that I feel
most discouraged and I'm fighting against itevery single day throughout the day. Namely,
(11:13):
these aspects are my walk with theLord, dating ministry, my family,
and my job. And I'm prettysure if some listeners are like,
oh my gosh, what is shehappy about? And don't get me wrong,
I am full with the joy ofthe Lord, absolutely I am.
(11:35):
I know the joy of the Lordis my strength. I do have his
peace that passes all understanding. Butif I'm keeping it one hundred keeping a
buck, you know, these arethese areas in my life that I am
fighting discouragement. I would even goahead and say, you know, my
(11:58):
current job is not a bad job. It's actually relatively easy. I love
helping people, and I just thankGod every day that I'm in a position
to be able to help people insome capacity, and I got into my
field for that very reason. Thepeople I work with are very pleasant,
very helpful, very knowledgeable, andtruly, on any job, you couldn't
(12:20):
really expect much better than what Ihave right now, and I just thank
God every single day. I prayfor them every day, but in the
same breath. Ever since I've beensaved, I've always had that sense of
more right. I've often had visionsand dreams about, you know, going
(12:41):
to the nations and preaching the gospel, going from city to city, tell
them the town house to house,telling people about Jesus Christ. And as
I'm getting older, especially in twentytwenty two, I feel an overwhelming sense
of more in my life. Andmaybe it's fair or unfair to blame this
(13:01):
job for kind of standing in myway, but I do feel like the
job is standing in my way.You know, in July, I quit
my job, my last job,when I was on vacation, because I
just needed I needed a change.You know, I didn't know what that
change was. I really still don'tknow what it is now. But when
(13:24):
I quit my job and kind ofimmerse myself into ministry, two things happened.
One I needed to pay my bills, and two I felt such peace,
such hey man, this is whereyou belong Kia. And I loved
it. I loved every day.I loved getting up every day knowing that
(13:46):
I'm going to do the work ofthe Lord. And undoubtedly, as I
record this today and speak about this, I know that's exactly what God has
called me to do. I've beensaved for goodness, I don't know twenty
years, I guess, and thatfeeling has not left me, and that's
(14:09):
it's not going to leave me.So I'm kind of like in an in
between state right now when it comesto that. You know, I try
to do a lot what I cando for ministry to kind of pacify or
ap piece those feelings that I feel. But quite frankly, it's not working.
(14:30):
But I just thank God for theopportunity He has given me on my
job in ministry to be able todo anything for the Kingdom of God.
But those are that's the area toothat I really kind of struggle with the
most as far as employment and ministrygoes. One of the other areas that
I wanted to touch on is mywalk with the Lord because I'm a firm
(14:54):
believer that I need to make sureI'm right before I tell other people.
And I can tell the people andfeel that guilt or you know, feel
that shame, and God get meand I'll repent and all that, but
I'd rather be able to not bea hypocrite beforehand, you know, So
I always take inventory of my currentstate of my spirituality and walk with the
(15:22):
Lord in I'm just not there.I'm not there, and I think it's
because a lot of stuff going onin my personal walk that I've allowed to
pull me away from God. NowI'm not talking about, you know,
backsliding or anything like that. I'mtalking about maybe praying less, you know,
(15:43):
spending a little less time in theBible. And as a Christian,
I know that's completely wrong. AndI'm just being honest and transparent right now
that every day, every single day, even throughout the day, I have
to encourage myself in the Lord becausethis is a season in my life where
(16:04):
and this season has lasted so far, all of twenty twenty two that I've
been mindful of. I got encouragemyself in the Lord that he is who
he says he is, and thatinstead of going away from him, I
need to draw closer and closer.And I have to remind myself that God
is who he says he is,and who he is surpasses all understanding.
(16:27):
Who he is is so much biggerthan any mountain that we are called to
climb, or any trouble we arecalled to face, or any person that
we engage with, that God isgreater. And I don't always think that,
I don't always feel that, youknow, but I have to encourage
myself in the Lord. And Iremember very recently I did a verse of
(16:52):
the day on that very topic ofencouraging yourself in the Lord. And I
believe it was in the Book ofpsalm the Psalmist wrote about encouraging themselves.
And we are called as Christians todo just that because there are seasons in
our life where we have to drawon what we know about God and and
and what's written in His word.And I thank God that we have His
(17:17):
word and that we have those experiencesof how He has come through for us
in such a time as this,because we need that. And that's how
I kind of justify or how Iam able to get up every single day
and and and and carry on isby the mercy and the grace of God
and brothers and sisters and listeners andviewers. I want to encourage you to
(17:37):
encourage yourself and the Lord, getinto His word and his presence, you
know, draw near to God andnot don't go further away from Him in
times like this. And I'm talkingto myself as I'm talking to you,
and one of the last aspects,well, I'm not really my family right
I'm feeling very uhcouraged about that,because you know, my family has always
(18:04):
had its ups and downs. Aswe're getting older, I actually had in
my mind that we would probably geta little closer. But as I'm seeing
in my family and especially with me, that you know, if we don't
deal with our problems, we carrythem with us. And as we carry
them so long, you know,we continue, it continues to weigh us
(18:26):
down. And that's what I'm seeingmy family right now, that we are
being weighed down tremendously by our problemsof the past. And even though I
try to be mindful of my biases, of my struggles, of the baggage
I carry, you know, Itry to cast my burdens onto the Lord
and be mindful not to you know, be tripped up by those things.
(18:51):
But I'm seeing that I not onlyhave to deal with my baggage, I'm
dealing with other people's as well,and that's really causing friction in my family.
Like it has always, but moreso more so much recently, and
it's very discouraging because it seems likewe just can't get our stuff together regarding
(19:12):
that. But you know, Godis teaching me and showing me and helping
me to remember pray. And Iknow I'm one, know one. I
can't stand keep hearing prayer, pray, pray, pray, But it's the
truth. You know, we mustpray. We can't. You can't do
anything. You can't do anything butpray and believe and trust God because that
(19:36):
is our weapon of offense. Wemust pray and remember that we don't battle
or wrestle against flesh and blood.We don't. It's not the person that
we should be engaging in spiritual warfarewith. It is the enemy behind that.
It's all demonic spirits and principalities thatwe truly wrestle against. And we
(19:57):
must fight it with the word ofGod through prayer and fasting and faith.
And I am remembering that as Godis calling to my remembrance that you know,
you need to take a step backhere from you know, the things
you've done with your family. Youcan't do those same things you've been doing
(20:18):
before. You need to pray.You need to trust me, you need
to stand in prayer. You needto stand and tocede for your family.
You must be strong in the Lordso you can continue to pray for your
family. And as I'm doing that, I'm seeing more and more that the
devil is fighting me on other aspects, especially in my family. So you
know, I'm pretty sure other peoplehave gone through this or going through this,
(20:41):
and it's not easy. But Godis stronger than the devil and any
problem we will face. So that'sa struggle. And lastly, it's not
a huge struggle for me, butdating as a Christian, single Christian at
that and b Lincy we talked aboutthis offline plenty of times. The dating
(21:03):
pool is horrible. You know.Sometimes I find myself feeling like I'm high
maintenance because I expect to engage witha Christian man, an authentic christ following
Christ's loving gentlemen. But as weare seeing, as we are in this
(21:26):
dating pool that the pool is kindof small and the pickings ain't that great.
And no shade and no shame onanyone. It's just that, you
know, because we know the loveof Christ in us and all that He
has accomplished. We refuse to settlefor less, and sometimes I have moments
of discouragement, like am I goingto be married? Am I going to
(21:51):
find the one? And not toput my business on blast? But those
are the moments I have. AndI refuse on a personal level to ever
be with someone that doesn't love Christas much as Christ loves me. And
that's just a plain fact. Andif that means being single for the rest
(22:11):
of my life, then that's whatit means, because I know what true
love feels like. And I've refuseto settle for less from anybody, quite
frankly, so I don't wanna,you know, be negative about anything even
though I am feeling discouraged or fightingagainst it. Regarding my whole entire life,
(22:34):
I know that God is good.I know that God is faithful.
I know that God is with mebecause He promised to never leave me nor
forsake me. He promised to alwaysbe there, even to the end of
age. And I know that evenas I speak right now, that He
is here and that I can leanand depend on him. It's up to
(22:56):
me. It's up to you tochoose to depend on the grid and mercy
and the power in the strength ofGod Almighty, He's there. And if
you've got to encourage yourself, ifyou've got to drop on your knees in
front of everybody to pray and askfor strength and encouragement to make it through
that moment, that second, thatday, that hour, then do so.
(23:17):
Because God is good and He alwayswill be good. And I know
that this season that I've in Valenciais not gonna last forever, and I
know that there is a greater futureto come. You know, I have
a hope that even if I shouldperish right after this podcast episode, that
my hope and my joy is gonnabe fulfilled because I'm gonna be with my
(23:40):
Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.So always, even though you feel discourage
about something's going on in your life, there's a hope that we have in
Jesus. We hope that you learneda great deal, and we hope that
we help shed some light on God'sword. Please share this podcast with others,
family members, co workers, orfriends. Also hit that light.
Share a subscribe button to receive notificationon the latest content, and feel free
(24:04):
to comment and share with us.Your thoughts on this episode were always inspired
by what God not only does inour lives, but yours as well.
And until then, may God blessyou, and you be a blessing
Hey to everyone, and thank youfor listening to this week's episode. My
name is Valencia and my name isKia, and this is the Truth Diarist.
This podcast has been brought to youby Way of Truth Evangelistic Ministries.
Our hope is to see people gainhope for their future, establish their faith
in God, and build upon theirfoundation in Christ. We share our personal
struggles, trials, and thoughts aswe navigate on this faith journey with Jesus
(00:23):
Christ. So today we're going tobe kind of talking about what our experiences
have been thus this far, justto give our listeners and our viewers perhaps
some insight on things that are goingon with us personally, maybe even with
the ministry Way of Truth Evangelistic Ministries, and ask Christians, you know,
(00:49):
because the purpose of this podcast isto first and foremost glorify God and also
hopefully to let our listeners know thatthey're not alone in this journey called life,
especially not in this journey with JesusChrist. So there's a lot of
ebbs and flows up and downs becauseof life, but there is a steady,
(01:10):
constant stream of hope and peace thatwe have in Him. So we're
going to get into a nice littlediscussion. But before we do, I
want to pray right now. DearHeavenly Father, we thank you for allowing
us to be here, Father God, to fellowship with one another. Lord.
We pray that our hearts and mindsbe open and receptive to what you
are doing today, what you say, Lord, and help us to live
(01:34):
obedient lives unto you, Father God. We pray that every listener and every
viewer today that is listening to thispodcast, Lord, will be blessed.
Lord. We pray that Lord God, you will also open their hearts in
their minds, God, change themwhere they need to be changed, Lord,
and bring yourself glory in the process. Father God, we thank you,
and we love and praise you inJesus name. We pray Amen.
(01:57):
So too, has been a yearunlike any other? How has this year
impacted your future? Outlook and walkwith the Lord? So twenty twenty two
has definitely been a tough year forme so far? Just a little background
formation. So I have. Ihave this new job that I'm working at
(02:22):
as in as in my field.It Suddenly I've been praying for a while
for a while now, since Istarted studying in accounting in school. I
wanted a job that you know,was in my field, and you know,
I kept getting you know, allthese different jobs that had nothing to
do with you know, what Ihad went to school with. So you
(02:45):
know, I remember just praying allthe time, you know, for you
know, God to help to putme in a position where I'm able to
you know, apply for a job, inspect old or or or get into
that particular job. And you know, now I have that job, and
you know, it's still not it'sstill not you know, as f feeling
(03:09):
as I thought, you know,and I'm also then we go home.
You know, I'm living at home, uh with my parents, and I
know those of you out there whoare adults who who are living at home,
uh y, you know the strugglethat that could be. And so
(03:29):
I'm at a point now where notwhere I think I should be at work
were at home. You know,I've been wanting, you know, to
get my own place, just toget that independence, uh and just a
job where you know, I feellike I'm making an impact or you know,
(03:54):
helping those out. Because I've alwayswanted to do a county. I
I love doing a county, butit was always because I wanted to help
those out there that might be strugglingwith finances and things of that nature.
It was never really you know,being at a firm and at office and
(04:16):
you know, just you know,kind of doing the same thing every day.
So right now I'm at a pointwhere you know, I'm just floating.
You know, I'm going I goto work because I feel like this
is where God wants me to be. And you know, I go home
and you know, try to tryto be content there bit, but really,
(04:42):
you know, I'm not content ateither. And it does, you
know, put an impact on yourfuture outlook and you know, walk with
the Lord, because when you're justfloating through or you just feel like,
well, this is where God wantsme to be, maybe you don't well
I would say, man, don'tpray as much as you should, don't
(05:03):
study as much, don't read becausenot to it sounds bad, but you
don't, you know, really feellike it. You f you know,
uh, reading you or or prayingor studying as much. You know,
you gotta just fall into like apattern. And you know it's not depression
(05:26):
because I never lost I I don'tlose ho. I I haven't lost hope
as long as God is with me, and I know he's there. I
never get to a point where I'velost or hope. I don't think things
can get better or you know,he can't uh turn things around and point
me back in the right position ifI'm not. So it's not the it's
(05:48):
not to that point. I Iwill never get to that point a again
as long as I have God.So, but it's definitely, uh a
struggle, you know, every daytrying to be uh try to be content
and trying to you know, justget through get through today, and wondering,
(06:15):
you know, is this where I'msupposed to be? You know,
is this where you know, reallywhere God wants to be and make construct
my attitudes right? And you know, getting up and praying more because I'm
not gonna get out of uh thisthinking or that's wrong without God, you
know. So I know that Ihave to pray. I know that I
have to continue to re read myword I and you know, and study
(06:36):
it community and communicate with God becauseyou know, he's the only one that
could help me. You know,I could tell you guys and and my
friend, but ultimately, if I'mnot where I'm supposed to be, the
only person that can put me whereI'm supposed to be is God. Uh
So I dobe that I have togo to him to kind of get these
(07:00):
answers. And I have been andyou know, I'm you know, I'm
still here. I haven't got thatanswer yet that this is where I'm supposed
to be and I'm doing everything hewants me to do at this moment.
So and you know, until Iuntil I do, I'm just you know,
being trying to be contend you knowwhere I'm at. So it definitely
(07:30):
has impacted my my walk. Iwould say, I would say it's more
like up and down at this pointbecause like I said, I'm not consistent
and doing what I'm supposed to doas far as praying and and reading my
word. As far as the future, there's so hope there that you know,
(07:54):
if this is not where I'm supposedto be, that I'm gonna get
there, that He's gonna help meget to where I'm supposed to be,
and that you know, things willget better even if I'm in it's this
same position that things will get better. And I think the what's what's really
m making me struggle? I feellike this is not where I'm supposed to
(08:16):
be is because you know, mypassion right now is uh ministry, you
know, in helping people. Andreally that's what's giving me the most,
the most happiness is when I'm workingon ministry, when we're out there preaching
(08:37):
the gospel, where we're no buildinga website or or putting the Boo book
out or you know, setting upa table, going evangelizing, that's what
brings me the most passion. Andbe honest with you, I would like
to do that every day, youknow. It ever seems like work and
(08:58):
nothing else s uh. Of coursebesides God brings me that that passion,
but I have to figure out away to or n not me. That's
the problem. I don't have tofigure out a way. I have to
keep praying that God helps me whereI'm at currently. So I am content
(09:24):
with what I'm doing right now becauseI feel like, no, I wouldn't
have got this sh I wouldn't havegot to shot without God. So obviously
this is where he wants me tobe a rather it's for a lesson or
whatever it is. I feel likeI'm where I'm supposed to be and until
I get you know, my attituderight, I don't feel like I'm gonna
(09:45):
move to that next step. Sothat's currently what I feeling now. As
far as you know my relationship andhow it's impacting my uh my future outlook
and my relationship, it's just strugglingto be contad in my current situation.
(10:11):
Hi everybody, this is Nikia,the co host of The Truth Diary's podcast,
my ministry partner and co host Valencia, and I wanna thank you for
checking out our podcast. If youhave missed any episodes, feel free to
go on Apple Podcasts or any platformyou get your podcasts. We wanna thank
you for your ongoing support and prayersas we continue to speak truth and encourage
(10:31):
others. There's our passion to beable to proclaim God's words in the world.
Proclaiming the Gospel is the very heartbeatof Way of Truth evangelistic ministries,
and it is our passion in lifeto help Christians discover the next crucial steps
in their walk with the Lord.We hope that this ministry gives insight into
those steps and also provides a richermeeting and explanation on why having a strong
(10:52):
and effective personal relationship with the Lordis important. Well Valencia. I wouldn't
really say that there is one aspectof my life that I feel discouraged about.
I would say my entire life atthis point in time that I feel
most discouraged and I'm fighting against itevery single day throughout the day. Namely,
(11:13):
these aspects are my walk with theLord, dating ministry, my family,
and my job. And I'm prettysure if some listeners are like,
oh my gosh, what is shehappy about? And don't get me wrong,
I am full with the joy ofthe Lord, absolutely I am.
(11:35):
I know the joy of the Lordis my strength. I do have his
peace that passes all understanding. Butif I'm keeping it one hundred keeping a
buck, you know, these arethese areas in my life that I am
fighting discouragement. I would even goahead and say, you know, my
(11:58):
current job is not a bad job. It's actually relatively easy. I love
helping people, and I just thankGod every day that I'm in a position
to be able to help people insome capacity, and I got into my
field for that very reason. Thepeople I work with are very pleasant,
very helpful, very knowledgeable, andtruly, on any job, you couldn't
(12:20):
really expect much better than what Ihave right now, and I just thank
God every single day. I prayfor them every day, but in the
same breath. Ever since I've beensaved, I've always had that sense of
more right. I've often had visionsand dreams about, you know, going
(12:41):
to the nations and preaching the gospel, going from city to city, tell
them the town house to house,telling people about Jesus Christ. And as
I'm getting older, especially in twentytwenty two, I feel an overwhelming sense
of more in my life. Andmaybe it's fair or unfair to blame this
(13:01):
job for kind of standing in myway, but I do feel like the
job is standing in my way.You know, in July, I quit
my job, my last job,when I was on vacation, because I
just needed I needed a change.You know, I didn't know what that
change was. I really still don'tknow what it is now. But when
(13:24):
I quit my job and kind ofimmerse myself into ministry, two things happened.
One I needed to pay my bills, and two I felt such peace,
such hey man, this is whereyou belong Kia. And I loved
it. I loved every day.I loved getting up every day knowing that
(13:46):
I'm going to do the work ofthe Lord. And undoubtedly, as I
record this today and speak about this, I know that's exactly what God has
called me to do. I've beensaved for goodness, I don't know twenty
years, I guess, and thatfeeling has not left me, and that's
(14:09):
it's not going to leave me.So I'm kind of like in an in
between state right now when it comesto that. You know, I try
to do a lot what I cando for ministry to kind of pacify or
ap piece those feelings that I feel. But quite frankly, it's not working.
(14:30):
But I just thank God for theopportunity He has given me on my
job in ministry to be able todo anything for the Kingdom of God.
But those are that's the area toothat I really kind of struggle with the
most as far as employment and ministrygoes. One of the other areas that
I wanted to touch on is mywalk with the Lord because I'm a firm
(14:54):
believer that I need to make sureI'm right before I tell other people.
And I can tell the people andfeel that guilt or you know, feel
that shame, and God get meand I'll repent and all that, but
I'd rather be able to not bea hypocrite beforehand, you know, So
I always take inventory of my currentstate of my spirituality and walk with the
(15:22):
Lord in I'm just not there.I'm not there, and I think it's
because a lot of stuff going onin my personal walk that I've allowed to
pull me away from God. NowI'm not talking about, you know,
backsliding or anything like that. I'mtalking about maybe praying less, you know,
(15:43):
spending a little less time in theBible. And as a Christian,
I know that's completely wrong. AndI'm just being honest and transparent right now
that every day, every single day, even throughout the day, I have
to encourage myself in the Lord becausethis is a season in my life where
(16:04):
and this season has lasted so far, all of twenty twenty two that I've
been mindful of. I got encouragemyself in the Lord that he is who
he says he is, and thatinstead of going away from him, I
need to draw closer and closer.And I have to remind myself that God
is who he says he is,and who he is surpasses all understanding.
(16:27):
Who he is is so much biggerthan any mountain that we are called to
climb, or any trouble we arecalled to face, or any person that
we engage with, that God isgreater. And I don't always think that,
I don't always feel that, youknow, but I have to encourage
myself in the Lord. And Iremember very recently I did a verse of
(16:52):
the day on that very topic ofencouraging yourself in the Lord. And I
believe it was in the Book ofpsalm the Psalmist wrote about encouraging themselves.
And we are called as Christians todo just that because there are seasons in
our life where we have to drawon what we know about God and and
and what's written in His word.And I thank God that we have His
(17:17):
word and that we have those experiencesof how He has come through for us
in such a time as this,because we need that. And that's how
I kind of justify or how Iam able to get up every single day
and and and and carry on isby the mercy and the grace of God
and brothers and sisters and listeners andviewers. I want to encourage you to
(17:37):
encourage yourself and the Lord, getinto His word and his presence, you
know, draw near to God andnot don't go further away from Him in
times like this. And I'm talkingto myself as I'm talking to you,
and one of the last aspects,well, I'm not really my family right
I'm feeling very uhcouraged about that,because you know, my family has always
(18:04):
had its ups and downs. Aswe're getting older, I actually had in
my mind that we would probably geta little closer. But as I'm seeing
in my family and especially with me, that you know, if we don't
deal with our problems, we carrythem with us. And as we carry
them so long, you know,we continue, it continues to weigh us
(18:26):
down. And that's what I'm seeingmy family right now, that we are
being weighed down tremendously by our problemsof the past. And even though I
try to be mindful of my biases, of my struggles, of the baggage
I carry, you know, Itry to cast my burdens onto the Lord
and be mindful not to you know, be tripped up by those things.
(18:51):
But I'm seeing that I not onlyhave to deal with my baggage, I'm
dealing with other people's as well,and that's really causing friction in my family.
Like it has always, but moreso more so much recently, and
it's very discouraging because it seems likewe just can't get our stuff together regarding
(19:12):
that. But you know, Godis teaching me and showing me and helping
me to remember pray. And Iknow I'm one, know one. I
can't stand keep hearing prayer, pray, pray, pray, But it's the
truth. You know, we mustpray. We can't. You can't do
anything. You can't do anything butpray and believe and trust God because that
(19:36):
is our weapon of offense. Wemust pray and remember that we don't battle
or wrestle against flesh and blood.We don't. It's not the person that
we should be engaging in spiritual warfarewith. It is the enemy behind that.
It's all demonic spirits and principalities thatwe truly wrestle against. And we
(19:57):
must fight it with the word ofGod through prayer and fasting and faith.
And I am remembering that as Godis calling to my remembrance that you know,
you need to take a step backhere from you know, the things
you've done with your family. Youcan't do those same things you've been doing
(20:18):
before. You need to pray.You need to trust me, you need
to stand in prayer. You needto stand and tocede for your family.
You must be strong in the Lordso you can continue to pray for your
family. And as I'm doing that, I'm seeing more and more that the
devil is fighting me on other aspects, especially in my family. So you
know, I'm pretty sure other peoplehave gone through this or going through this,
(20:41):
and it's not easy. But Godis stronger than the devil and any
problem we will face. So that'sa struggle. And lastly, it's not
a huge struggle for me, butdating as a Christian, single Christian at
that and b Lincy we talked aboutthis offline plenty of times. The dating
(21:03):
pool is horrible. You know.Sometimes I find myself feeling like I'm high
maintenance because I expect to engage witha Christian man, an authentic christ following
Christ's loving gentlemen. But as weare seeing, as we are in this
(21:26):
dating pool that the pool is kindof small and the pickings ain't that great.
And no shade and no shame onanyone. It's just that, you
know, because we know the loveof Christ in us and all that He
has accomplished. We refuse to settlefor less, and sometimes I have moments
of discouragement, like am I goingto be married? Am I going to
(21:51):
find the one? And not toput my business on blast? But those
are the moments I have. AndI refuse on a personal level to ever
be with someone that doesn't love Christas much as Christ loves me. And
that's just a plain fact. Andif that means being single for the rest
(22:11):
of my life, then that's whatit means, because I know what true
love feels like. And I've refuseto settle for less from anybody, quite
frankly, so I don't wanna,you know, be negative about anything even
though I am feeling discouraged or fightingagainst it. Regarding my whole entire life,
(22:34):
I know that God is good.I know that God is faithful.
I know that God is with mebecause He promised to never leave me nor
forsake me. He promised to alwaysbe there, even to the end of
age. And I know that evenas I speak right now, that He
is here and that I can leanand depend on him. It's up to
(22:56):
me. It's up to you tochoose to depend on the grid and mercy
and the power in the strength ofGod Almighty, He's there. And if
you've got to encourage yourself, ifyou've got to drop on your knees in
front of everybody to pray and askfor strength and encouragement to make it through
that moment, that second, thatday, that hour, then do so.
(23:17):
Because God is good and He alwayswill be good. And I know
that this season that I've in Valenciais not gonna last forever, and I
know that there is a greater futureto come. You know, I have
a hope that even if I shouldperish right after this podcast episode, that
my hope and my joy is gonnabe fulfilled because I'm gonna be with my
(23:40):
Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.So always, even though you feel discourage
about something's going on in your life, there's a hope that we have in
Jesus. We hope that you learneda great deal, and we hope that
we help shed some light on God'sword. Please share this podcast with others,
family members, co workers, orfriends. Also hit that light.
Share a subscribe button to receive notificationon the latest content, and feel free
(24:04):
to comment and share with us.Your thoughts on this episode were always inspired
by what God not only does inour lives, but yours as well.
And until then, may God blessyou, and you be a blessing
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