February 14, 2019 • 29 mins
Ron and Carolina take part in a mind expanding interview and meditation session with guru Deepak Chopra.
Credits:Ron Burgundy: Host, Writer, Executive ProducerCarolina Barlow: Co-Host, Writer, and Producer.Producers: Whitney Hodack, Jack O’Brien, Miles Gray, and Nick StumpfExecutive Producer: Mike FarahConsulting Producer: Andrew SteeleAssociate Producer: Anna HossniehWriter: Jake FogelnestProduction Supervisor: Colin MacDougallThis episode was Engineered, Mixed and Edited by: Nick StumpfMusic Clearance by Suzanne CoffmanGuest Expert: Deepak Chopra
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Who am I? What is this realm? What is up
there in the night sky? Where is the edge to
this beautiful flat earth? Is the ocean blue because the
sky is blue? Is the sky blue because that's God's
(00:20):
favorite color? Because he's a boy? These are some of
the questions that keep me and Baxter up at night.
We go back and forth trading our thoughts and feelings.
The other night we were talking about what if our
feet were our hands and our hands were our feet.
I mean, the randomness of it all, it's just astonishing.
(00:44):
Why is a nose called a nose? Why is a
carolina called a carolina? Oh? My parents name me? That
is everything? Okay, realm, I've just never heard you talk
like this. Does something happen? Well, it's it's a long story.
Over the weekend, I went to a place called Joshua Tree.
(01:06):
Now I didn't didn't go there on purpose, mind you.
Actually was quite the adventure. I was walking to my
local stopping shop and well, you can fill in the rest. No,
I can't. I can't fill in the rest. Well, I
ran into an old pal I used to jam with. You,
remember Skylar, right, Skyler with the sax. Well you can
(01:30):
guess what happens next? No, I promise I can't get jeez,
you're not helping me out here. You're really gonna make
me spell this out for you, aren't you. No. I
just want to know your story about Joshua Tree. I mean,
whatever led you to all of these surreal questions about
the world. I'm interested? All right. Well, Skylar and his
(01:51):
sacks took me on the road with his jazz trio.
I hopped on their tour bus to their next gear
at Toyota, Sienna. Okay, and boy was it magical? Me
Skyler and his crew. We we played music. We sang
some songs, drank a little, danced a little, fought over
(02:11):
some power dynamics in the band, met some mysterious women
who we loved. But God did Carolina we love the
music more. It's a common conflict. Then, right around the
third act, life on the road took a turn for
the worse. Empty glass pipes all around me. A love child,
I abandoned somewhere an Encino Eggzema. My life was in
(02:35):
the toilet bowl. I had to miss our next show
at the gas Lamp Artisan Market's annual pet parade. I
told Skyler to pull the bus over. How long were
you on the bus? Depending on traffic, it's about a
two hour drive anyway, I told them to drop me
off in Joshua Tree, the desert. There had to be
(02:56):
something more to this life than the lights, the fans,
the girls. And he said, you went south from Diego. Yes, yeah,
I never know how tough it is to get into
Joshua Tree. The security is insane, the guard towers, the fencing,
the dogs, the people selling chicklets. Drink it, drink its chicklets.
(03:21):
You know what I think now that you're saying, I
think you went to Mexico. Well, wherever it was, it
was beautiful, sandy beaches, amazing food, nice people. They were
speaking Spanish. Now that's Mexico. That's where you were. And
it was in Joshua Tree where I found only more questions.
Where does all this beauty come from in the world?
Does it come from me? Does it come from my
(03:43):
own eyeballs that see it? No, it's definitely the world
definitely already exists. Is life an amazing dream? I don't know,
ron I mean, these are just questions mystics have been
asking since the beginning of time, which is why I
have chosen our topic today to be the questions of
the universe for the sake of time. Do you think
(04:04):
we can get more specific? Um? Okay, the questions of
our world? It's still pretty broad. Maybe, um, maybe a
specific question. Okay, how about the questions of life and
love and the planets beyond. That's it. That'll be our
top Maybe just spirituality, or how about you let me
(04:27):
pick the topic since it's my fucking podcast. Sorry, sorry,
I am so sorry. I know you can you look
at me. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Let's just ya, you're right.
Just maybe let's spirit spiritlogy, spirituality, spirituality. That'll be today's topic.
(04:49):
And I wish I wish that were someone we could
we could call to talk about the subject. Otherwise you
and I can handle it, I think. Okay, let me
pass me your book. I'll see if we have look
through my rolodex here, Yes, I keep a rolodex, folks.
My rollo X doesn't lose its memory, not a lot
(05:09):
of How is Stephanie that she's not very spiritual? Okay? Yeah,
I wouldn't call her girl with lippering. Girl with lippering.
There's no name there is there even a number? Um?
It's just I think it's just a stick figure. Yeah,
(05:30):
girl with lippering. Thank you. You have nine one one
in here? Just so I I remember to call nine
one one if there's an emergency. Okay, And you have
the number to dial Z one hundreds Z one hundreds
dash for cash. Yes, um, oh my god? Do you
(05:54):
is this real? Do you have Deepak cho Deepak Chopra's number?
Of course I do, Deepox. He would be perfect. Oh,
he would be I don't want to bother him though. Okay, well,
well let's see if we could track him down. He's
usually just sitting around his apartment in New York. Oh
my god, this would be amazing. I feel like an idiot.
Of course, let's call deepop This is one of five
(06:16):
numbers you have in your roods. Why I didn't land
on that one to begin with? It's crazy? But then again,
you know, I forgot I have nine one one in there? Also?
Have you ever forgotten that number? I can't say that
I have, but I just it's like a security blanket.
I think if I took the nine one card out
(06:38):
of my rolodex, I'd panic and I'd forget. What is
the number for emergency? Do you know what the number
for information is? Non emergency information? Yeah? Can you write
that in that blank rollodex right there? Three? One? Okay,
got it? And then this weekend, I know you're not
doing anything because you're never doing anything. I have some
(07:00):
can you find out where girl with a lip ring
do some research stry to tracker downy? I mean I
can make flyers, I guess sure. Okay, all great ideas.
Can you rin Assessna an airplane and drop the flyers
out of the plane World War two style? Yes? I
(07:20):
feel like that must be illegal. We won't know it's
illegal until we try it or until we ask just
do it. Okay, this is out of our budget, I think,
but I will look into Okay, so we are currently
we're gonna go to break as we try to track
down Mr Deepak Chopra fingers crossed. We'll see what happens,
(07:47):
and we're back in the Ron Burgundy podcast. We are
about to dial Mr Deepak Chopra, good friend of mine,
to get into the topic of spirituality. So Carolina, go
ahead and die up our friend Mr Deepak Ray. He's
going to be thrilled and duco for solo. Hello is
deep back? There. Who's this Hi, This is Stephanie. Hang up,
(08:11):
Hang up, quickly, hang up, hang up? Okay, okay, okay,
who dodged a bullet on that one? Who's Stephanie mixing
the numbers? Yeah? Oh, but you know what Stephanie knows,
girl with the lip ring to go through her? Okay,
(08:34):
all right, try try this other number, the one that's
if you scrape away that kicked on barbecue sauce, you
can get the rest of them, the rest of the
number there. This is perfect cute. Well it's not blood,
it's not human blood. Okay, do you have it there? Okay?
Dialing Mr deepak Bra Hello, Hi is this deep Yeah, Depark,
(09:02):
so wonderful to have you here via satellite phone. Thank
you for being a part of the podcast today. Thank
you on it's a pleasure to be with you. Where
where are you calling from right now? Somewhere somewhere exotic?
Actually I lived non locally, but my physical body is
in New York at the moment. You live non locally
(09:25):
and but the physical body? Yes, Um, what does that
mean living? What exactly does that mean? I am and
I live Wherever I am and where I am has
no location in space? And time. By saying I am
I'm not referring to the body mind. I'm referring to
(09:48):
the awareness in which my body mind is a changing experience.
So when we say we're in Los Angeles, we are
are physically were our physic called bodies in Los Angeles,
but our body mind. But but the fact is that
Los Angeles is a human construct like latitude and longitude
(10:12):
are a human construct. Of money is a human construct.
Of wall streets is a human construct. Greinwich mean time
is a human concerts Philadelphia is not a human construct
that places it is. I don't know about that, yeah, exactly.
So what is it that creates those constructs? Why do
human beings creates stories around raw experience? Why do they
(10:35):
do that? Patients? Yes? Why? Because we are storytellers, That's it.
We're the only species who tells stories, including a story
called nation state, or story called religion, a story called science.
And then we mess up and we create climate change
and war and terrorism and eco destruction and extinction of
(10:56):
species and violence. We are we're in same species. Well,
there is a raccoon that lives in my backyard. He
tells me stories every Sunday night. Does that count No,
you interpret the stories. Run are you? I swear he
talks to me? Okay, Well, then in that case you
you have broken the mold. You are into inter species communication.
(11:21):
That's where it's all about what the perceptual experience of
the rackooness Deepak. Let me ask you this, when when
you were in school, did your friends call you d
money or was it always just Deepak? They calls me deep? Okay?
I like that that works on many different levels because
(11:42):
you are a deep person and deep yes. Um, let
me ask you, what would you tell someone who just
has questions about life. Well, on a very superficial level,
I would say life is a sexually transmitted into watch it,
(12:03):
watch it, d money, watch it. Life is a sexually
transmitted in durable condition. On a deeper level, life is
all there is. Without life, there is no experience. True
life is all what we call the body, what we
call the world, what we call anything that we give
(12:23):
a name to is it actually created in consciousness? And
once we agree on the meaning of the world, it
becomes our reality. I know that you probably are a
huge proponent of of trying to live more In the moment,
I would assume that Um and I have trouble because
(12:46):
I'm always thinking, Oh, I've got to plan my next vacation.
Oh what should I have for lunch? Should I have
a grilled cheese sandwich or tuna? You know? What what
steps should we take to just slow down and live
more in the moment? Yeah, Ron, that's a very important question,
because if you're not living in the moment and always
(13:08):
um in the future of the past, then you're not
really here. You know that what's his name, Wittgenstein, the
German philosopher, that we are asleep. Life is a dream,
But once in a while we wake up enough to
know that we're dreaming, and we wake up to ourselves,
which is this this presence that we call now. So
(13:31):
everything that is even a trillionth of a second in
the past or a trillionth of a second in the
future is a dream. So we are in fact living
a dream reality. And if you're always anticipating the future
when it finally arrives, you won't be there for it.
So what's the point. Sometimes I wake up and I
am running down the middle lane of the freeway in
(13:55):
my underwear, screaming at the top of my lunch. What
does that mean? Means that you're having a panic attack.
For whatever reason, you're having existential anxiety. Fair enough, What
what is your hope for the human race? Can I
ask you that? I think if you really want, um
(14:15):
my honest opinion, the human race is doomed to extinction.
We've it's it's an experiment that didn't work out. So
I think either we evolve to a new stage of
our being or we're doomed like the dinosaurs. So we're
(14:35):
up creek without a paddle. Yeah, we need to take
a leap in our imagination to see what a peaceful,
just sustainable, healthier and joyful world could be because it exists.
It exists in our imagination at the moment. If we
somehow evolved and developed gills and could breathe underwater with
(14:58):
that help, I think it would help unless we created
the junkyard underwater as well, But we're doing right now,
you know, I think nothing will happen. We could go
into outer space and still create junk over there. So
the only thing that could help is our own transformation.
(15:19):
So at our in our pure essence, we're just nasty creatures.
We have the potential, though, for being both divine and babolical.
So right now we actually expressed our diabolical tendencies, but
we have the other tendency too. Do you have any
(15:40):
TV shows? Do you have any favorite TV shows? Do
you like? I used to watch Candid Camera that really
there's a lot of fun. And I wish the whole
world would watch stuff like that. Then they wouldn't be
so nationalist an angry, and you know, they'd understand the
(16:03):
human conditions little more because you know, well, Run that
humor is is dealing with contradiction and paradox and ambiguity,
and it is actually humor is a way to get
to our soul, as most art is. Science is the
language of the mind. I've always said that what you do,
(16:25):
what you guys do, is language of the soul. That
is wonderful language of the soul. That science of the mind,
language of the soul. Yeah, that's a good Do you
mind if we take that for runs? Could I copyright that?
You can steal it? Okay? Perfect? Oh my god, thank you.
This is recorded, so this will stand up in a
in a court of law. Thank you. Deepak. If you
(16:48):
would honor us and lead us in a bit of
a meditation here, we would we would love to to
go along with you here. Sure, so wherever you are
if you can, unless you're driving. Wherever you are, just
sit quietly, put your feet firmly on the ground, and
(17:10):
keep your eyes closed or close your eyes and start
to observe your breath and just watching the breath will
slow it down. And since breath and sort go together,
just watching the breath, your mind will settle. And now
(17:31):
bring it into or bring your awareness into your heart
in the middle of the chest, and then mentally asked
the following question who am I? What am I? Antially meant,
and then don't try to answer it. Just be aware
(17:52):
of any sensation, image, feeling or thought that comes to you.
Do it a pull of times, a few times mentally
who am I? What am I? If you want to
go deeper, say who who wants to know? Who wants?
What is it that wants to know? Just observing any sensations, images, feelings, thoughts.
(18:20):
That's spontaneously right a chicken caesar salad reading, And now
ask the question what do I want? What is my
deepest desire? Once again allowing any sensations, images, feelings, or
thoughts to spontaneously. Riss Is are you dying. Two more questions,
(18:46):
what is my purpose? Fantasy lead? Why do I do
what I do? Have a w n B a fantasy leak,
allowing any sensation, image, feeling, or thought to come to you? Yes,
Sueperd had assists. And now the final question points what
(19:08):
am I grateful for? Not firelight like allowing any sensation, image, feeling,
a thought to come to And now just feel your body,
feel the sensations in your body. It takes a few
(19:28):
seconds and open your right m. This is a meditation
in reflective self inquiry. Now is it, customer? My wallet
is gone? Yeah? Is that? I told you money is
(19:49):
a human construct? Because someone made it up? Someone took
my wallet, just saying whether whether it's a human construct
or not, Well, that's not your concern and we've got
to get at that here. While my eyes were shut
and was blowing, my heart rate stole. Well, you exchange
your inner being and that was the payment. But your
(20:17):
idea wasn't there? Right? Okay? Um, Well what I feel
very very calm. Oh, I'm so happy. We can do
other kinds of meditations. You know, there's awareness of mind,
awareness of emotions, awareness of body, aware awareness of perception
(20:40):
of relationship, transcendence, meditation. Most people don't understand meditation. They
think it's a system of thought, but actually it's a
way of bypassing thought. So we're not supposed to pay
attention to our thoughts. No, whatever happens is fine. But
you can see that most of your thoughts on at
(21:00):
your own they're recycling public information, so you don't have
to be victimized by thought. Can you teach me how
to levitate or levitate an object? Yes, but we'd have
to be there together. And how much would that cost me?
Huh nothing? Oh? Okay, good, Wow, I'd be charging with
(21:24):
a lot of money. I mean, I know that's a
human construct, but i'd be charging. Once you realize that
the physical body is an illusion, then you can do
whatever you want. It's part of the dream like that.
So the next time I'm at a Lakers game and
I don't have a ticket, I can just walk right
down to the front row and I can just say
(21:46):
that you are on the human body you want is Yeah, Well,
their security is pretty tight, very tight. Trust me. Deep.
Let me ask you this, what's your nine to five? Like,
what's a typical day for Deep? Actobra. Typical days, I
woke wake up very early. I wake up around four
(22:08):
thirty five. I spend two hours in reflection and meditation.
I do one hour yoga every day, and then after that,
I just shoot the breeze. I'm meaning, I do whatever
I feel like, and it's like I'm singing my song
(22:28):
and some people enjoy hearing it. And then in the
evening I do a shortter meditation. I go for a
long walk in New York City, and before I sleep,
I meditate on the mystery of death. Holy smokes, I
don't know. But I'm seventy two. I don't have to
(22:50):
face the fact that I'm in the final chapters of
my life. You're on the you're on the back nine,
as I say, the golf world, Yes, what do we do? Deepark?
If like, what do you do with criticism? Or if
anyone's mean to you? Yeah? What if someone walks up
to you while you're on your walk through New York
City and say, hey, Bob, out of my way. Um,
(23:16):
if it's a homeless person, I give them twenty dollars.
If it's somebody else, I just keep walking. And I
used to get offended by the good and by the
bad opinions of others. It was never immune to criticism,
but then I worked on it and write this moment
in my life, I'm immune to both criticism and flattery.
(23:40):
With growing older kind of you're just middle of the road,
right there. Yeah, well, I let it pass. It's not
important if you're If you are always concerned about what
other people think about you, then you'll be offended for
the rest of your life. I need to work on
that because I still love compliments so much, and criticism
(24:01):
just it reduces me to rubble. Usually if Ron gets criticized,
he just sits down wherever he is in the middle
of the floor. I just pout, well, well the seat, Ron.
The secret to power is to be is to be
immune to criticism and flattery, to be fearless, and to
(24:22):
feel beneath no one. That's called self power. Everything else's
agency power. It can be taken away from you in
the blink of an eye. But the flattery is pretty
fun though. Still. Yeah, if you're eight years old to
se to see my friend, well, you know what, in
(24:46):
some ways we should We should always hope that we
act like eight year old. That's true, But some eight
years end up being heads of state. That's true. Deep,
my man, you're on fire right now. You are on fire,
my friend. Um. We cannot thank you enough for being
on the podcast today. Thank you for taking us on
(25:08):
a Thank you so much. It was an Oh, I'm
very grateful. Thank you, and I hope to see you
guys sometimes. If I never in New York, I'll call you.
Let's go out for a beer and maybe I can
sleep on your floor. Sure, well, treat you to a
good conica and you'll be making it in your nervous
system so we won't have to go out. Perfect sounds good.
(25:31):
Thank you, sir, Thank you so much. Thank you so much, everyone,
Thank you so much. The Ron Burgundy Podcast. We'll be
right back, and we are back. You are listening to
the Ron Burgundy Podcast once again, right thanks to Mr Deep.
What a fascinating individual, amazing, just completely has let go
(25:57):
of the earthly realm. We're dreaming. It's pretty fascinating. We
still haven't found my wallet, we're still look. I know
that's a man made construct, but that man made construct
was filled with two thousand dollars in cash. Yeah, I know.
It's a problem. Yeah, that's a problem. Well, there's only
a few people in the studio. That's more than half
(26:18):
of what's in my checking account. Anyway, we'll figure it out.
We'll figure it out. Um. But boy, Deepak, he sent
a shiver through my spine. He doesn't have a lot
of hope for the human race to figure it out.
And girls won't help us either. Deals will not help.
I thought for sure that was going to be the
lightbulb moment. You always call that your backup. We can
(26:39):
develop guills. In fact, if I was Bill Gates, I
would will all my money to the research and development
of gills for humans, Guild Development. Guild Development. I don't know,
that's a real that might be a waste. And the
theme song for the charity of Old Development would be
(27:01):
sung by Country Western start Vince Gille. Oh, and we
need a theme song for the Guilt. If they wanted
to have one, we'd call it Vince Gille. I mean,
it's a it's an idea. I'm a dreamer, I know,
and I'm a dreamer. Um. Okay, let's go to our
fact check. Well, there's no reason to have a fact
(27:22):
check today, because as Deepak laid it out for us
so eloquently. Um, these are all human constructs. They don't
really exists. Okay, you're gonna go against the money, No, no, no,
I just all get him right back on the phone.
We'll go right around with this world flat. There was
just human construct all right. Then I'll just scratch this. Yeah, off,
(27:47):
I guess, I guess we'll just move on. Yeah, we will,
we will move on. Here's my final thoughts. Please, what
do you know? I went looking for answers in all
the wrong places, and I realized there is oneness in
us all we just have to connect. And oh wait,
(28:12):
oh gosh, I just realized I left my jacket and
Skyler's toyota. Maybe my wallet was in the jack. Okay, CAROLINEA,
you're gonna have to go over to his house and
pick it up for me, all right after after we
finish her right now, No, no, tomorrow, after he's already
sold it for hash yes now please all right, um, okay,
(28:37):
I'll be back in a s and and bring a
bone to throw at the doverman in his front yard.
It's not a it's not human friendly. Can can she
hear me? Does she already leave? Oh? Carolina, let her
know about anyway. That's all for now, folks, catch you
(28:57):
on the Flip Side podcast. By bye. The Ron Burgundy
Podcast is a production of I Heart Radio podcast Network
and Funnier Die. I'm Ron Burgundy. I'm the host, writer
and executive producer. Carolina Barlow is my co host, writer
and producer. The show was also produced by Whitney Hodeck,
(29:18):
Jack O'Brien, Miles Gray, and Nick Stuff. Our executive producer
is Mike farre Our consulting producer is Andrew Steel. Our
associate producer is Anna Hosnier. Our writer is Jake Vogeleis.
Our production supervisor is Colin McDougall. This episode was engineered, mixed,
and edited by Nick Stump. Until next time, this was
(29:38):
Ron Burgundy.
Who am I? What is this realm? What is up
there in the night sky? Where is the edge to
this beautiful flat earth? Is the ocean blue because the
sky is blue? Is the sky blue because that's God's
(00:20):
favorite color? Because he's a boy? These are some of
the questions that keep me and Baxter up at night.
We go back and forth trading our thoughts and feelings.
The other night we were talking about what if our
feet were our hands and our hands were our feet.
I mean, the randomness of it all, it's just astonishing.
(00:44):
Why is a nose called a nose? Why is a
carolina called a carolina? Oh? My parents name me? That
is everything? Okay, realm, I've just never heard you talk
like this. Does something happen? Well, it's it's a long story.
Over the weekend, I went to a place called Joshua Tree.
(01:06):
Now I didn't didn't go there on purpose, mind you.
Actually was quite the adventure. I was walking to my
local stopping shop and well, you can fill in the rest. No,
I can't. I can't fill in the rest. Well, I
ran into an old pal I used to jam with. You,
remember Skylar, right, Skyler with the sax. Well you can
(01:30):
guess what happens next? No, I promise I can't get jeez,
you're not helping me out here. You're really gonna make
me spell this out for you, aren't you. No. I
just want to know your story about Joshua Tree. I mean,
whatever led you to all of these surreal questions about
the world. I'm interested? All right. Well, Skylar and his
(01:51):
sacks took me on the road with his jazz trio.
I hopped on their tour bus to their next gear
at Toyota, Sienna. Okay, and boy was it magical? Me
Skyler and his crew. We we played music. We sang
some songs, drank a little, danced a little, fought over
(02:11):
some power dynamics in the band, met some mysterious women
who we loved. But God did Carolina we love the
music more. It's a common conflict. Then, right around the
third act, life on the road took a turn for
the worse. Empty glass pipes all around me. A love child,
I abandoned somewhere an Encino Eggzema. My life was in
(02:35):
the toilet bowl. I had to miss our next show
at the gas Lamp Artisan Market's annual pet parade. I
told Skyler to pull the bus over. How long were
you on the bus? Depending on traffic, it's about a
two hour drive anyway, I told them to drop me
off in Joshua Tree, the desert. There had to be
(02:56):
something more to this life than the lights, the fans,
the girls. And he said, you went south from Diego. Yes, yeah,
I never know how tough it is to get into
Joshua Tree. The security is insane, the guard towers, the fencing,
the dogs, the people selling chicklets. Drink it, drink its chicklets.
(03:21):
You know what I think now that you're saying, I
think you went to Mexico. Well, wherever it was, it
was beautiful, sandy beaches, amazing food, nice people. They were
speaking Spanish. Now that's Mexico. That's where you were. And
it was in Joshua Tree where I found only more questions.
Where does all this beauty come from in the world?
Does it come from me? Does it come from my
(03:43):
own eyeballs that see it? No, it's definitely the world
definitely already exists. Is life an amazing dream? I don't know,
ron I mean, these are just questions mystics have been
asking since the beginning of time, which is why I
have chosen our topic today to be the questions of
the universe for the sake of time. Do you think
(04:04):
we can get more specific? Um? Okay, the questions of
our world? It's still pretty broad. Maybe, um, maybe a
specific question. Okay, how about the questions of life and
love and the planets beyond. That's it. That'll be our
top Maybe just spirituality, or how about you let me
(04:27):
pick the topic since it's my fucking podcast. Sorry, sorry,
I am so sorry. I know you can you look
at me. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Let's just ya, you're right.
Just maybe let's spirit spiritlogy, spirituality, spirituality. That'll be today's topic.
(04:49):
And I wish I wish that were someone we could
we could call to talk about the subject. Otherwise you
and I can handle it, I think. Okay, let me
pass me your book. I'll see if we have look
through my rolodex here, Yes, I keep a rolodex, folks.
My rollo X doesn't lose its memory, not a lot
(05:09):
of How is Stephanie that she's not very spiritual? Okay? Yeah,
I wouldn't call her girl with lippering. Girl with lippering.
There's no name there is there even a number? Um?
It's just I think it's just a stick figure. Yeah,
(05:30):
girl with lippering. Thank you. You have nine one one
in here? Just so I I remember to call nine
one one if there's an emergency. Okay, And you have
the number to dial Z one hundreds Z one hundreds
dash for cash. Yes, um, oh my god? Do you
(05:54):
is this real? Do you have Deepak cho Deepak Chopra's number?
Of course I do, Deepox. He would be perfect. Oh,
he would be I don't want to bother him though. Okay, well,
well let's see if we could track him down. He's
usually just sitting around his apartment in New York. Oh
my god, this would be amazing. I feel like an idiot.
Of course, let's call deepop This is one of five
(06:16):
numbers you have in your roods. Why I didn't land
on that one to begin with? It's crazy? But then again,
you know, I forgot I have nine one one in there? Also?
Have you ever forgotten that number? I can't say that
I have, but I just it's like a security blanket.
I think if I took the nine one card out
(06:38):
of my rolodex, I'd panic and I'd forget. What is
the number for emergency? Do you know what the number
for information is? Non emergency information? Yeah? Can you write
that in that blank rollodex right there? Three? One? Okay,
got it? And then this weekend, I know you're not
doing anything because you're never doing anything. I have some
(07:00):
can you find out where girl with a lip ring
do some research stry to tracker downy? I mean I
can make flyers, I guess sure. Okay, all great ideas.
Can you rin Assessna an airplane and drop the flyers
out of the plane World War two style? Yes? I
(07:20):
feel like that must be illegal. We won't know it's
illegal until we try it or until we ask just
do it. Okay, this is out of our budget, I think,
but I will look into Okay, so we are currently
we're gonna go to break as we try to track
down Mr Deepak Chopra fingers crossed. We'll see what happens,
(07:47):
and we're back in the Ron Burgundy podcast. We are
about to dial Mr Deepak Chopra, good friend of mine,
to get into the topic of spirituality. So Carolina, go
ahead and die up our friend Mr Deepak Ray. He's
going to be thrilled and duco for solo. Hello is
deep back? There. Who's this Hi, This is Stephanie. Hang up,
(08:11):
Hang up, quickly, hang up, hang up? Okay, okay, okay,
who dodged a bullet on that one? Who's Stephanie mixing
the numbers? Yeah? Oh, but you know what Stephanie knows,
girl with the lip ring to go through her? Okay,
(08:34):
all right, try try this other number, the one that's
if you scrape away that kicked on barbecue sauce, you
can get the rest of them, the rest of the
number there. This is perfect cute. Well it's not blood,
it's not human blood. Okay, do you have it there? Okay?
Dialing Mr deepak Bra Hello, Hi is this deep Yeah, Depark,
(09:02):
so wonderful to have you here via satellite phone. Thank
you for being a part of the podcast today. Thank
you on it's a pleasure to be with you. Where
where are you calling from right now? Somewhere somewhere exotic?
Actually I lived non locally, but my physical body is
in New York at the moment. You live non locally
(09:25):
and but the physical body? Yes, Um, what does that
mean living? What exactly does that mean? I am and
I live Wherever I am and where I am has
no location in space? And time. By saying I am
I'm not referring to the body mind. I'm referring to
(09:48):
the awareness in which my body mind is a changing experience.
So when we say we're in Los Angeles, we are
are physically were our physic called bodies in Los Angeles,
but our body mind. But but the fact is that
Los Angeles is a human construct like latitude and longitude
(10:12):
are a human construct. Of money is a human construct.
Of wall streets is a human construct. Greinwich mean time
is a human concerts Philadelphia is not a human construct
that places it is. I don't know about that, yeah, exactly.
So what is it that creates those constructs? Why do
human beings creates stories around raw experience? Why do they
(10:35):
do that? Patients? Yes? Why? Because we are storytellers, That's it.
We're the only species who tells stories, including a story
called nation state, or story called religion, a story called science.
And then we mess up and we create climate change
and war and terrorism and eco destruction and extinction of
(10:56):
species and violence. We are we're in same species. Well,
there is a raccoon that lives in my backyard. He
tells me stories every Sunday night. Does that count No,
you interpret the stories. Run are you? I swear he
talks to me? Okay, Well, then in that case you
you have broken the mold. You are into inter species communication.
(11:21):
That's where it's all about what the perceptual experience of
the rackooness Deepak. Let me ask you this, when when
you were in school, did your friends call you d
money or was it always just Deepak? They calls me deep? Okay?
I like that that works on many different levels because
(11:42):
you are a deep person and deep yes. Um, let
me ask you, what would you tell someone who just
has questions about life. Well, on a very superficial level,
I would say life is a sexually transmitted into watch it,
(12:03):
watch it, d money, watch it. Life is a sexually
transmitted in durable condition. On a deeper level, life is
all there is. Without life, there is no experience. True
life is all what we call the body, what we
call the world, what we call anything that we give
(12:23):
a name to is it actually created in consciousness? And
once we agree on the meaning of the world, it
becomes our reality. I know that you probably are a
huge proponent of of trying to live more In the moment,
I would assume that Um and I have trouble because
(12:46):
I'm always thinking, Oh, I've got to plan my next vacation.
Oh what should I have for lunch? Should I have
a grilled cheese sandwich or tuna? You know? What what
steps should we take to just slow down and live
more in the moment? Yeah, Ron, that's a very important question,
because if you're not living in the moment and always
(13:08):
um in the future of the past, then you're not
really here. You know that what's his name, Wittgenstein, the
German philosopher, that we are asleep. Life is a dream,
But once in a while we wake up enough to
know that we're dreaming, and we wake up to ourselves,
which is this this presence that we call now. So
(13:31):
everything that is even a trillionth of a second in
the past or a trillionth of a second in the
future is a dream. So we are in fact living
a dream reality. And if you're always anticipating the future
when it finally arrives, you won't be there for it.
So what's the point. Sometimes I wake up and I
am running down the middle lane of the freeway in
(13:55):
my underwear, screaming at the top of my lunch. What
does that mean? Means that you're having a panic attack.
For whatever reason, you're having existential anxiety. Fair enough, What
what is your hope for the human race? Can I
ask you that? I think if you really want, um
(14:15):
my honest opinion, the human race is doomed to extinction.
We've it's it's an experiment that didn't work out. So
I think either we evolve to a new stage of
our being or we're doomed like the dinosaurs. So we're
(14:35):
up creek without a paddle. Yeah, we need to take
a leap in our imagination to see what a peaceful,
just sustainable, healthier and joyful world could be because it exists.
It exists in our imagination at the moment. If we
somehow evolved and developed gills and could breathe underwater with
(14:58):
that help, I think it would help unless we created
the junkyard underwater as well, But we're doing right now,
you know, I think nothing will happen. We could go
into outer space and still create junk over there. So
the only thing that could help is our own transformation.
(15:19):
So at our in our pure essence, we're just nasty creatures.
We have the potential, though, for being both divine and babolical.
So right now we actually expressed our diabolical tendencies, but
we have the other tendency too. Do you have any
(15:40):
TV shows? Do you have any favorite TV shows? Do
you like? I used to watch Candid Camera that really
there's a lot of fun. And I wish the whole
world would watch stuff like that. Then they wouldn't be
so nationalist an angry, and you know, they'd understand the
(16:03):
human conditions little more because you know, well, Run that
humor is is dealing with contradiction and paradox and ambiguity,
and it is actually humor is a way to get
to our soul, as most art is. Science is the
language of the mind. I've always said that what you do,
(16:25):
what you guys do, is language of the soul. That
is wonderful language of the soul. That science of the mind,
language of the soul. Yeah, that's a good Do you
mind if we take that for runs? Could I copyright that?
You can steal it? Okay? Perfect? Oh my god, thank you.
This is recorded, so this will stand up in a
in a court of law. Thank you. Deepak. If you
(16:48):
would honor us and lead us in a bit of
a meditation here, we would we would love to to
go along with you here. Sure, so wherever you are
if you can, unless you're driving. Wherever you are, just
sit quietly, put your feet firmly on the ground, and
(17:10):
keep your eyes closed or close your eyes and start
to observe your breath and just watching the breath will
slow it down. And since breath and sort go together,
just watching the breath, your mind will settle. And now
(17:31):
bring it into or bring your awareness into your heart
in the middle of the chest, and then mentally asked
the following question who am I? What am I? Antially meant,
and then don't try to answer it. Just be aware
(17:52):
of any sensation, image, feeling or thought that comes to you.
Do it a pull of times, a few times mentally
who am I? What am I? If you want to
go deeper, say who who wants to know? Who wants?
What is it that wants to know? Just observing any sensations, images, feelings, thoughts.
(18:20):
That's spontaneously right a chicken caesar salad reading, And now
ask the question what do I want? What is my
deepest desire? Once again allowing any sensations, images, feelings, or
thoughts to spontaneously. Riss Is are you dying. Two more questions,
(18:46):
what is my purpose? Fantasy lead? Why do I do
what I do? Have a w n B a fantasy leak,
allowing any sensation, image, feeling, or thought to come to you? Yes,
Sueperd had assists. And now the final question points what
(19:08):
am I grateful for? Not firelight like allowing any sensation, image, feeling,
a thought to come to And now just feel your body,
feel the sensations in your body. It takes a few
(19:28):
seconds and open your right m. This is a meditation
in reflective self inquiry. Now is it, customer? My wallet
is gone? Yeah? Is that? I told you money is
(19:49):
a human construct? Because someone made it up? Someone took
my wallet, just saying whether whether it's a human construct
or not, Well, that's not your concern and we've got
to get at that here. While my eyes were shut
and was blowing, my heart rate stole. Well, you exchange
your inner being and that was the payment. But your
(20:17):
idea wasn't there? Right? Okay? Um, Well what I feel
very very calm. Oh, I'm so happy. We can do
other kinds of meditations. You know, there's awareness of mind,
awareness of emotions, awareness of body, aware awareness of perception
(20:40):
of relationship, transcendence, meditation. Most people don't understand meditation. They
think it's a system of thought, but actually it's a
way of bypassing thought. So we're not supposed to pay
attention to our thoughts. No, whatever happens is fine. But
you can see that most of your thoughts on at
(21:00):
your own they're recycling public information, so you don't have
to be victimized by thought. Can you teach me how
to levitate or levitate an object? Yes, but we'd have
to be there together. And how much would that cost me?
Huh nothing? Oh? Okay, good, Wow, I'd be charging with
(21:24):
a lot of money. I mean, I know that's a
human construct, but i'd be charging. Once you realize that
the physical body is an illusion, then you can do
whatever you want. It's part of the dream like that.
So the next time I'm at a Lakers game and
I don't have a ticket, I can just walk right
down to the front row and I can just say
(21:46):
that you are on the human body you want is Yeah, Well,
their security is pretty tight, very tight. Trust me. Deep.
Let me ask you this, what's your nine to five? Like,
what's a typical day for Deep? Actobra. Typical days, I
woke wake up very early. I wake up around four
(22:08):
thirty five. I spend two hours in reflection and meditation.
I do one hour yoga every day, and then after that,
I just shoot the breeze. I'm meaning, I do whatever
I feel like, and it's like I'm singing my song
(22:28):
and some people enjoy hearing it. And then in the
evening I do a shortter meditation. I go for a
long walk in New York City, and before I sleep,
I meditate on the mystery of death. Holy smokes, I
don't know. But I'm seventy two. I don't have to
(22:50):
face the fact that I'm in the final chapters of
my life. You're on the you're on the back nine,
as I say, the golf world, Yes, what do we do? Deepark?
If like, what do you do with criticism? Or if
anyone's mean to you? Yeah? What if someone walks up
to you while you're on your walk through New York
City and say, hey, Bob, out of my way. Um,
(23:16):
if it's a homeless person, I give them twenty dollars.
If it's somebody else, I just keep walking. And I
used to get offended by the good and by the
bad opinions of others. It was never immune to criticism,
but then I worked on it and write this moment
in my life, I'm immune to both criticism and flattery.
(23:40):
With growing older kind of you're just middle of the road,
right there. Yeah, well, I let it pass. It's not
important if you're If you are always concerned about what
other people think about you, then you'll be offended for
the rest of your life. I need to work on
that because I still love compliments so much, and criticism
(24:01):
just it reduces me to rubble. Usually if Ron gets criticized,
he just sits down wherever he is in the middle
of the floor. I just pout, well, well the seat, Ron.
The secret to power is to be is to be
immune to criticism and flattery, to be fearless, and to
(24:22):
feel beneath no one. That's called self power. Everything else's
agency power. It can be taken away from you in
the blink of an eye. But the flattery is pretty
fun though. Still. Yeah, if you're eight years old to
se to see my friend, well, you know what, in
(24:46):
some ways we should We should always hope that we
act like eight year old. That's true, But some eight
years end up being heads of state. That's true. Deep,
my man, you're on fire right now. You are on fire,
my friend. Um. We cannot thank you enough for being
on the podcast today. Thank you for taking us on
(25:08):
a Thank you so much. It was an Oh, I'm
very grateful. Thank you, and I hope to see you
guys sometimes. If I never in New York, I'll call you.
Let's go out for a beer and maybe I can
sleep on your floor. Sure, well, treat you to a
good conica and you'll be making it in your nervous
system so we won't have to go out. Perfect sounds good.
(25:31):
Thank you, sir, Thank you so much. Thank you so much, everyone,
Thank you so much. The Ron Burgundy Podcast. We'll be
right back, and we are back. You are listening to
the Ron Burgundy Podcast once again, right thanks to Mr Deep.
What a fascinating individual, amazing, just completely has let go
(25:57):
of the earthly realm. We're dreaming. It's pretty fascinating. We
still haven't found my wallet, we're still look. I know
that's a man made construct, but that man made construct
was filled with two thousand dollars in cash. Yeah, I know.
It's a problem. Yeah, that's a problem. Well, there's only
a few people in the studio. That's more than half
(26:18):
of what's in my checking account. Anyway, we'll figure it out.
We'll figure it out. Um. But boy, Deepak, he sent
a shiver through my spine. He doesn't have a lot
of hope for the human race to figure it out.
And girls won't help us either. Deals will not help.
I thought for sure that was going to be the
lightbulb moment. You always call that your backup. We can
(26:39):
develop guills. In fact, if I was Bill Gates, I
would will all my money to the research and development
of gills for humans, Guild Development. Guild Development. I don't know,
that's a real that might be a waste. And the
theme song for the charity of Old Development would be
(27:01):
sung by Country Western start Vince Gille. Oh, and we
need a theme song for the Guilt. If they wanted
to have one, we'd call it Vince Gille. I mean,
it's a it's an idea. I'm a dreamer, I know,
and I'm a dreamer. Um. Okay, let's go to our
fact check. Well, there's no reason to have a fact
(27:22):
check today, because as Deepak laid it out for us
so eloquently. Um, these are all human constructs. They don't
really exists. Okay, you're gonna go against the money, No, no, no,
I just all get him right back on the phone.
We'll go right around with this world flat. There was
just human construct all right. Then I'll just scratch this. Yeah, off,
(27:47):
I guess, I guess we'll just move on. Yeah, we will,
we will move on. Here's my final thoughts. Please, what
do you know? I went looking for answers in all
the wrong places, and I realized there is oneness in
us all we just have to connect. And oh wait,
(28:12):
oh gosh, I just realized I left my jacket and
Skyler's toyota. Maybe my wallet was in the jack. Okay, CAROLINEA,
you're gonna have to go over to his house and
pick it up for me, all right after after we
finish her right now, No, no, tomorrow, after he's already
sold it for hash yes now please all right, um, okay,
(28:37):
I'll be back in a s and and bring a
bone to throw at the doverman in his front yard.
It's not a it's not human friendly. Can can she
hear me? Does she already leave? Oh? Carolina, let her
know about anyway. That's all for now, folks, catch you
(28:57):
on the Flip Side podcast. By bye. The Ron Burgundy
Podcast is a production of I Heart Radio podcast Network
and Funnier Die. I'm Ron Burgundy. I'm the host, writer
and executive producer. Carolina Barlow is my co host, writer
and producer. The show was also produced by Whitney Hodeck,
(29:18):
Jack O'Brien, Miles Gray, and Nick Stuff. Our executive producer
is Mike farre Our consulting producer is Andrew Steel. Our
associate producer is Anna Hosnier. Our writer is Jake Vogeleis.
Our production supervisor is Colin McDougall. This episode was engineered, mixed,
and edited by Nick Stump. Until next time, this was
(29:38):
Ron Burgundy.
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