April 26, 2024 • 22 mins
Susie Evans is back to go BEYOND our Bachelor Nation superstars and get the real story from their close friends and family! Jess Higgins is ready to share all the secrets behind her marriage to our own Ben Higgins!
Jess reveals how it felt to find out Ben was “the” Bachelor, what it’s like getting to know other members of Bachelor Nation, and Jess has some advice for anyone who might be dating a Bachelor alum!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is all most famous Beyond the Bachelor with Susie Evans.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Hey, guys, welcome back to Beyond the Bachelor. I'm Susie,
your host, and I'm sure everyone knows Ben Higgins from
season twenty of The Bachelor. Today we're going to be
talking to his wife, Jessica Clark Higgins, So please welcome jess.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
Hey, Hi, how's it going and how are you. I'm good.
I'm so happy that you're doing this and we're doing this. No,
I was so happy when they texted me because I'm like,
oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Wait. First of all, I love Susie and I'm so
pumped you started a podcast. Yeah, thanks for thinking of.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Yeah absolutely, I mean I feel like you're exactly who
comes to mind when you think Beyond the Bachelor.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
You know. Oh, but of course.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
So I feel like, I'm sure you've talked about it
a thousand times, but let the people know how it
did Ben slide into the DMS. I feel like everyone
knows that he's the one that reached out to you.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
What did that look like, what did he say? And
how did you feel when you saw the message? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (01:05):
So he was staying in Nashville at a hotel and
there was a hockey game across the street, and he
wanted to know who was playing in the hockey game,
and so he searched Bridgetone Arena on his Instagram and
I had just tagged my location there, so I popped
up on his Explore page and he like, screenshot in
my photo. It's a photo with my dad. So I
(01:26):
always joke with him because I'm like, did you like
me or my dad? Because he was the photo. But
he screenshot at it and then saw it a couple
months later and decided to shoot his shot. He was
starting to date again after The Bachelor, and so he
messaged me and I was home with my family for
(01:47):
Thanksgiving and someone with like a million followers and it
was back before you could buy a blue check mark,
so I'm like, who is this person with the blue
check mark that's messaging me. I was just working in
Nashville and my mom had watched his season and she
was like, you have to find out how you found
your photo. That's so random. So I replied, and we've
(02:08):
talked every day since.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Oh my gosh, I love that.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
So you kind of knew from the time that you
dated or went on your first date that Ben was
going to be your person. Did you have that like
when you know you know moment?
Speaker 1 (02:23):
I think we had it as so we like facetimed
every day for three weeks before we ever met in person.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Are you serious?
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Yes, for like hours because he lives in Denver. He
was living in Denver and I was in Nashville. So
it was like one of us going to fly to
the other one. What are we going to do to
ever see each other in person? But we have to
make sure it's worth it first, especially because like he
is more of a public figure, and so I think
that it felt like the risks were higher if, like
(02:52):
it didn't work out, and I went all the way
out there. So we facetimed for like hours a day
and just really got to know each other and each
other hearts, and I never met anybody like him before that.
I just felt like we were so similar in our
beliefs and what we wanted out of life, and we
could talk about anything, Like I felt like nothing was
off limits with him, and I could joke around with
(03:13):
him and just be myself. So then both of us
had a little bit to drink one night at the
same time, and he bought me a plane ticket and
I flew out the next day and it was like so.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Fast, Oh my gosh. I feel like that's every fangirl's dream.
And I don't know if.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
You watched The Bachelor before or if you knew who
Ben was, but I feel like if you've ever been
a huge fan of like a band or a show
or like a movie, something along those lines, your dream
is that you're going to like stumble upon meeting this
like famous rock star whoever, and they're going to fly
you out and you're gonna fall in love and get
married and have a beautiful life and you're literally living
(03:54):
the dream.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
No, it really is crazy, Like I this is not
what I ever. I never thought I would date or
marry someone that was like in the public in any
sort of way. But it's worked out. And he he
you met Ben, He's just like the best person, so he.
Speaker 3 (04:15):
Makes it easy. That's so sweet. What was your.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
First experience or exposure to kind of like the limelight,
So obviously you went out to Denver. Did people take
pictures with you guys, did you guys get spotted or
did you try to keep it on the DL And
what was that like when you first did get spotted together,
so I.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Feel like we've never I've never really talked about this.
But when I flew out to Denver the next day,
he had like an appearance with a company, so he
was he had we had to go to like this
thing and he was doing a meet and greet and
I'm like, what this is, like do I it is weird?
Speaker 3 (04:52):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
And so I went to this meet and greet with
him and I was fine. I just sat there and
they were giving me free food, and I just want
to happen. I'm like, this is so bizarre, like who
is this person? What's happening? But we weren't really like
spotted or anything, because I was just chilling watching him
do his thing. And I think I like went shopping
because it was at the mall. But then we dated
(05:16):
for a couple months and we went to some dinners
and there were like all of these rumors that we
were dating. And I started to get like some Instagram
followers that are like this, you have to be dating Ben,
and like all these messages and stuff. And I still
remember the day that someone must have posted in a
blog this is so funny to talk about because I
(05:38):
feel like it was so long ago, but I remember
I like looked at my phone and I was at
work and I had gotten like twelve thousand views or
something on my Instagram story and I had like a
couple thousand followers just from college, and I was like,
what is happening? And it was I was selling lights
at the time, and it was a story of me
with like this huge light bulb, and I was like,
(06:00):
this is so embarrassing. And I remember that day really well.
But that was probably the first time that I was like,
oh he is he must be more and more important
than I thought, yeah, because I wasn't as familiar with
like the Bachelor world, So that was the first time.
And then I don't even know the first time I
(06:21):
met all the Bachelor people. It might have been Ashley
and Jared's wedding, Oh.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
My gosh, and that would have been was that when
was that? Was that before twenty twenty yes? Right, twenty
nineteen nineteen, like this summer, And is that when sort
of your bacheloration friendship started? Because I know, obviously you're
super close with a lot of people like Kaylen, and
you are obviously super close and who are else are
(06:45):
kind of like your friends amongst the Bachelor Nation group.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Yeah, Kaylan is probably my best friend from Bachelor Nation,
especially because now they live in Colorado. I'm going to
see her on Saturday. Beca Tilly has always been like
such a great friend me. She is amazing. And then
we see dian A Lot. We've always seen dian A
Lot Wells. Wells has always been a really good friend.
He and I went to the same college too. Yeah,
(07:12):
we Ben has a lot of really good friends from
the Bachelor and I'm really lucky that everyone has like
been so kind and like embraced me so well.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
So well, You're easy to embrace obviously. When I met you,
I was I mean, I feel.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Like I knew of you through.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
The grapevine and stuff, and your reputation is wonderful. Everyone
says you're like the most kind, sweet person and have
the best skin, which is true. I have a book
an appointment with you, and I feel like anyone listening
to this if you have skin or beauty questions, I
feel like you need to head over to Jess's Instagram
because I feel like You've got all the answers.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Even in person. You're just glowing.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
But it's so fun to see how you're kind of
just like that honorary Bachelor Nation. You kind of just
fit right in. You're not even like an honorary You're
just a part of it now.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
That actually means a lot, because it definitely is like intimidating.
I don't know if you felt that way after getting
off the show and then you're kind of thrust into things.
But it's a lot of people. Everyone is like, very
good looking, and you don't know if they're gonna be
nice or not, and most people are and it's just
it's a crazy world. But I mean same with you.
(08:22):
Everyone was like, You're gonna love Susie and I was like, hey,
why can't meet to meet her? And we had such
a blast.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
But so much fun.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
I'm curious your thoughts on dating shows. Do you think
that they are a legitimate way to find love?
Speaker 1 (08:37):
That's a good question. What's so funny is I talk
to my clients about this a lot because most of
my clients in my skincare clinic are women, and a
lot of them are like, should I go on the Bachelor?
Speaker 3 (08:47):
And I'm like, Dan, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
It just depends on what you want because it works
for some people, like you really do see it happen,
even like Kaylin and Dean, but then it doesn't work
for a lot of people. But it's almost like a
dating app, like you're gonna go on a lot of
dates before you find your person. And I never thought
I would find my husband on Instagram. So if you're
(09:10):
going to find him on a TV show, like, go
for it. But I think you have to go into
it like expecting the worst maybe and being pleasantly surprised.
But it's almost like a moment of like what do
I have to lose? I know that was where Ben
was at when he went on the show, was like
I've got nothing else going on, like why not? And
if it works, it works, and if it doesn't, it doesn't.
(09:31):
So things like holding it all loosely so true.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
And have you watched Ben's season?
Speaker 1 (09:37):
No?
Speaker 3 (09:37):
Ever?
Speaker 1 (09:38):
No? So I my mom reminded me, like after bed
and I had been dating for several months, She's like,
you know, you've seen an episode of his Bachelor season?
Like I was home and it was on because my
family would watch it, and I was home from college
and it was on and I saw him and she
said that she remembers because I looked at the TV
(10:00):
screen and I was like, he's really cute. That's the
kind of guy I would date, And like that was
all I ever said about it. And I don't even remember.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
Oh my gosh, she's that crazy. I like low key manifested,
but I got chills. I'm not vocal because it's cold
in my hotel room or the story just gave me chills,
but that's actually kind of crazy.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Yeah, But I never went back and watched his season
after we started dating, like the whole thing, because it's
one thing to know that the person you're with has
had an X or x's or done whatever. It's another thing.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
To watch it.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
And I just I don't think.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
It would be healthy. Honestly.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I can attest to that because when I was coming
off the show, I was with the guy that was
the Bachelor, and I felt like I had to watch
it back because it was also what was airing of myself.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
So I was like, I can't be unaware of what's.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Being shown and the narrative of like what we're seeing
as the public versus what my reality was. But it
was really hard to like want back the person you're
in a relationship with like fall in love or date
or have express feelings to other people. So I totally
get that. And I'm always curious people that have been
the Bachelor or Bachelorette and then they're in new relationships.
(11:13):
I'm always like, do people go back and watch like
their partners?
Speaker 3 (11:17):
Do they go back?
Speaker 1 (11:18):
I can't imagine, Like I I saw a clip one
time of him talking to one of like the last
girls on his season, and he was like looking at
her the way he was looking at me, and I
was like, I cannot do this like that. That is crazy.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
That is crazy.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
When you look at it from where you guys are
at now, like how far you've come, and you think
about contextually, it's like when you're on the show, it's
such a short period of time. And even though I think,
you know, Clayton said that he was in love with
me at that point, I'm like, based on where we
got later in our relationship or different relationships outside, It's
like you might think you love somebody or you might
feel certain things in the moment, but like I feel
(12:07):
like time and like having a real life relationship is
how those things really build, and then you have those
moments where like, oh, I totally thought that was love,
but it really wasn't, and it's just crazy that works out.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
That's so interesting. I feel like I haven't heard a
lot of it from the women's perspective either because I
talked to Ben about it, but.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Yeah, it's really interesting.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
I also think like because Ben Ben was the bachelor
two years before I met him, maybe longer than that,
and now we've been together for five, so it feels
like less and less kind of significant to our relationship.
Like right when we started dating, I was like very
insecure about it, very worried about being compared to his ex,
(12:51):
like all of those things were like all consuming. But
then the farther you get away, the more you're like,
oh no, you.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
Like it's just us.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
But it took a while to get there.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
And also I think I don't know if you've if
you have this experience, but I feel like it's one
thing to have, like you said, to have a boyfriend
or fiance husband and then they haven't experts another thing
to probably constantly get asked about it like I'm doing
in this interview asking you questions about.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
The past, where people just keep.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
Revisiting this narrative because that's what people saw on TV.
And I feel like people probably have no clue how
hard it is to navigate like post TV show relationships,
whether you were on it or if you're dating somebody
that was on it.
Speaker 3 (13:37):
What would be like your best advice for.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
Somebody that is dating a former bachelor or bachelorette.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah, I love that such a niche group, but I
stick together, honestly, I would say, like, I mean, first
of all, I love that I didn't watch it because
I think that that would have really messed with my
head in a different way. And then like, remember that
they're with you for a reason, Like it didn't work
out with the other people for a reason, and not
(14:07):
because those people are bad people by any means. Most
of the people I've met from Ben season are some
of my favorite girls of all time. But it's just
like there's a reason why it worked with me and
not them, And saying with the people that they're with
now you know what I mean. So I think just
like staying really confident and true to who you are
(14:28):
and focusing on your own relationship, which when I started
dating Ben, I had a mentor and she told me, like,
wake up in the morning, and remind yourself like what
is true today and go through the truths of today.
So like today Ben is your boyfriend, you live in Nashville,
you work for this company, and like going through like
those truths helps a lot too.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
That's so powerful. Like that's powerful beyond dating.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
That's so important, whether it's like anxiety or you know,
work trouble, because I feel like so many people get
caught up on like thinking. And I know even as
you're saying, I'm like, oh, I should do that for
myself because there's so many things happening and if you
can just like bring yourself back to reality and kind
of like touch grass, then so many things evaporate from
(15:14):
that realm of like the emotional side that causes anxiety
or stress and like all the negativity totally.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
And I'm like a future tripper. So I still do
that to this day. I'll wake up and be like
I don't need to worry about that because today I'm
waking up, I'm going to work, I'm walking my dog.
Like that's my truth for today. And like you said,
it's very like grounding.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Yes, that's so true. Okay, well besides the Bachelor stuff.
I know you obviously get to travel with Ben occasionally
to some of these events. Do you enjoy the travel
or do you like being home in Colorado or do
you prefer kind.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
Of a balance.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
I'm more of a balanced person. I love my routine,
I love my home. I do really well when I can,
like find time to rest, learning to rest more, and
traveling can sometimes just make me a little bit anxious,
especially if it's like a go go go lifestyle. Bin's
had the go go lifestyle for like seven years, and
(16:11):
he also works virtually and I work in person, and
so I think that stresses me out a little bit too.
We talk all the time of if it would be
different if my whole practice was virtual instead of in person,
I might not feel so anxious.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
But I also.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
I've never experienced fomo in my life. But I think
I get to the point where I'm like, we'll never
get to have this opportunity again, Like I want to
do it, like the Carmel trip where I met you.
I'm like, what else can I go to a Carmel
by the sea?
Speaker 3 (16:39):
Are you kidding?
Speaker 1 (16:40):
So I definitely try and weigh it in those terms
of will I ever be able to do this again?
And if the answer is maybe not, then I'll do it.
But I always prefer to stay home.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
Such a good way to look at it.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
And there are so many cool things that you get
to do when you're kind of like in this world.
What has been your favorite trip or experience that you
guys have done together, whether it was like brand or
work related, or just something that you guys have done together.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
Right when we started dating, we'd been dating for like
eight months, and he did a golf tournament in Switzerland,
which now I'm looking back and I'm like, that was
really unlike him. He would I don't feel like he
would ever do that again. And I don't know if
it was like a flex, I have no idea, but
he took me to Switzerland and that was like so cool.
(17:29):
I remember thinking like this guy, like who is he?
Speaker 3 (17:33):
And this trip was amazing?
Speaker 1 (17:34):
And so that stands out for sure, And then I'm
trying to think we've done like so many cool things.
I really enjoyed the Carmel trip in Pebble Beach. I
thought that was really fun. Yeah, just like all these
places I never would normally go. Anything that we've done
(17:55):
with iHeart, I mean all of it, Like I don't
regret going on any single trip with him. But the
Switzerland thing, I'm like, that was really wild of you
to do, but it was really fun.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
Honestly, the Switzerland was definitely a flex Like that's pretty wild.
Speaker 3 (18:11):
I feel like a guy flying you to Switzerland.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
Like that's just the next level living in a dream.
If he's like daty guy, he flies you to Switzerland
for a golf tournament, that is wild and.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
That's so not been That's what's weird. It's like that's
not him at all. He's he would never do that
to like impress anybody. And I think he probably wanted
to play in the golf tournament in Switzerland and then
it was like, well, I guess I'll bring my new girlfriend.
Like I don't know, but yeah, we've never done anything
like that since, and we've never really like talked about
doing anything like that since.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
But that was really cool. That's awesome.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
Okay, And then I want to talk a little bit
about your clinic in Colorado, Like what do you specialize in?
I feel like when I saw you last, I was
asking you all the skin questions, But what do you
specialize in? What do you see people for most? And
like what tips and tricks can you give people today
for their skin and to look beautiful and feel beautiful.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
I know, I last time we were together, I was like, no,
we'll FaceTime and go over your skin, and then we
just never did. So we still need to do that,
first of all, because it's my absolute favorite thing. But yeah,
I have a clinic in Denver. I'm an acne specialist,
so I usually start seeing people when they're experiencing acne,
and then we'll get them to a point where that's
not really a main concern anymore, and I'll do things
(19:32):
like micro needling. I have an oxygen facial machine, so
technically I'm a medical asthetician as well, which is really fun.
But I think the biggest tip that I can give
people really is to find like what's personalized to them,
because we're all so uniquely made and you, I mean,
I get overwhelmed seeing like other people's skincare routine, So
(19:53):
I can only imagine not having the knowledge that I
do have in seeing that. I think I would get
so sucked into it. But our skin is so different,
just like our bodies are so different, and like whatever
you prefer is different. So I think finding like paying
attention to your own skin. Even meeting with a professional
and seeing what they would recommend based on your concerns
(20:15):
can be super, super beneficial because otherwise you're just going
to keep on trying things that don't work for you, right.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
And there's so much money in that industry, And I
feel like, I'm sure a lot of people can relate
to this.
Speaker 3 (20:27):
When you see people on Instagram or.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Whatever and I post about things and I try new things,
but I think it can be really intimidating because you're
seeing people that probably have a filter on may or
may not have a filter on, and there's claiming certain
products do certain things. So I think that's such good
advice to like go seek professionally, like somebody professionally and just.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Find out what works for you. That's like, I feel
like everyone can can take that to heart.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
Yeah, And I always have people that are like, You're
going to be so mad that I love this product,
And I'm like, I'm not mad. If you love a product,
if it works for you, it works for you, Like
if you absolutely swear by and is steer them from
the ordinary, like that's amazing. You should keep using it
because it works for your skin. I'll tell you what
I think could be better, but that you know, use
(21:14):
what works for you. It doesn't really matter.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
That's awesome. Well, I think that's all of our questions.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
I mean, thank you so much for joining me and
going through and letting us like pry into your life
and get all the juicy ta the app Oh.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
My gosh, you literally were praying at all. That's such
great questions. So it's really fun to talk about because
it has been a while since I was like the
new kid on the block with the bachelor stuff, so
it's kind of fun to think about again.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
That's good. I'm glad.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
So I'm like, sometimes it feels I don't want to
ask too many of the same things over and over again.
But I'm glad that you enjoyed it, and thank you
for joining us. I know you have to run. Thank
you for doing this on your lunch break.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Oh my gosh, anytime, always always down to chat. Awesome,
Thank you, welcome, bye bye.
Speaker 3 (22:07):
Thank you so much to Jess for joining us.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
It was great to hear the behind the scenes on
how she met Ben and a little bit more about
her life in Colorado. Thank you guys for listening beyond
the Bachelor, We'll see you next time.
This is all most famous Beyond the Bachelor with Susie Evans.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Hey, guys, welcome back to Beyond the Bachelor. I'm Susie,
your host, and I'm sure everyone knows Ben Higgins from
season twenty of The Bachelor. Today we're going to be
talking to his wife, Jessica Clark Higgins, So please welcome jess.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
Hey, Hi, how's it going and how are you. I'm good.
I'm so happy that you're doing this and we're doing this. No,
I was so happy when they texted me because I'm like,
oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Wait. First of all, I love Susie and I'm so
pumped you started a podcast. Yeah, thanks for thinking of.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Yeah absolutely, I mean I feel like you're exactly who
comes to mind when you think Beyond the Bachelor.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
You know. Oh, but of course.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
So I feel like, I'm sure you've talked about it
a thousand times, but let the people know how it
did Ben slide into the DMS. I feel like everyone
knows that he's the one that reached out to you.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
What did that look like, what did he say? And
how did you feel when you saw the message? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (01:05):
So he was staying in Nashville at a hotel and
there was a hockey game across the street, and he
wanted to know who was playing in the hockey game,
and so he searched Bridgetone Arena on his Instagram and
I had just tagged my location there, so I popped
up on his Explore page and he like, screenshot in
my photo. It's a photo with my dad. So I
(01:26):
always joke with him because I'm like, did you like
me or my dad? Because he was the photo. But
he screenshot at it and then saw it a couple
months later and decided to shoot his shot. He was
starting to date again after The Bachelor, and so he
messaged me and I was home with my family for
(01:47):
Thanksgiving and someone with like a million followers and it
was back before you could buy a blue check mark,
so I'm like, who is this person with the blue
check mark that's messaging me. I was just working in
Nashville and my mom had watched his season and she
was like, you have to find out how you found
your photo. That's so random. So I replied, and we've
(02:08):
talked every day since.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Oh my gosh, I love that.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
So you kind of knew from the time that you
dated or went on your first date that Ben was
going to be your person. Did you have that like
when you know you know moment?
Speaker 1 (02:23):
I think we had it as so we like facetimed
every day for three weeks before we ever met in person.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Are you serious?
Speaker 1 (02:31):
Yes, for like hours because he lives in Denver. He
was living in Denver and I was in Nashville. So
it was like one of us going to fly to
the other one. What are we going to do to
ever see each other in person? But we have to
make sure it's worth it first, especially because like he
is more of a public figure, and so I think
that it felt like the risks were higher if, like
(02:52):
it didn't work out, and I went all the way
out there. So we facetimed for like hours a day
and just really got to know each other and each
other hearts, and I never met anybody like him before that.
I just felt like we were so similar in our
beliefs and what we wanted out of life, and we
could talk about anything, Like I felt like nothing was
off limits with him, and I could joke around with
(03:13):
him and just be myself. So then both of us
had a little bit to drink one night at the
same time, and he bought me a plane ticket and
I flew out the next day and it was like so.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Fast, Oh my gosh. I feel like that's every fangirl's dream.
And I don't know if.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
You watched The Bachelor before or if you knew who
Ben was, but I feel like if you've ever been
a huge fan of like a band or a show
or like a movie, something along those lines, your dream
is that you're going to like stumble upon meeting this
like famous rock star whoever, and they're going to fly
you out and you're gonna fall in love and get
married and have a beautiful life and you're literally living
(03:54):
the dream.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
No, it really is crazy, Like I this is not
what I ever. I never thought I would date or
marry someone that was like in the public in any
sort of way. But it's worked out. And he he
you met Ben, He's just like the best person, so he.
Speaker 3 (04:15):
Makes it easy. That's so sweet. What was your.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
First experience or exposure to kind of like the limelight,
So obviously you went out to Denver. Did people take
pictures with you guys, did you guys get spotted or
did you try to keep it on the DL And
what was that like when you first did get spotted together,
so I.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Feel like we've never I've never really talked about this.
But when I flew out to Denver the next day,
he had like an appearance with a company, so he
was he had we had to go to like this
thing and he was doing a meet and greet and
I'm like, what this is, like do I it is weird?
Speaker 3 (04:52):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
And so I went to this meet and greet with
him and I was fine. I just sat there and
they were giving me free food, and I just want
to happen. I'm like, this is so bizarre, like who
is this person? What's happening? But we weren't really like
spotted or anything, because I was just chilling watching him
do his thing. And I think I like went shopping
because it was at the mall. But then we dated
(05:16):
for a couple months and we went to some dinners
and there were like all of these rumors that we
were dating. And I started to get like some Instagram
followers that are like this, you have to be dating Ben,
and like all these messages and stuff. And I still
remember the day that someone must have posted in a
blog this is so funny to talk about because I
(05:38):
feel like it was so long ago, but I remember
I like looked at my phone and I was at
work and I had gotten like twelve thousand views or
something on my Instagram story and I had like a
couple thousand followers just from college, and I was like,
what is happening? And it was I was selling lights
at the time, and it was a story of me
with like this huge light bulb, and I was like,
(06:00):
this is so embarrassing. And I remember that day really well.
But that was probably the first time that I was like,
oh he is he must be more and more important
than I thought, yeah, because I wasn't as familiar with
like the Bachelor world, So that was the first time.
And then I don't even know the first time I
(06:21):
met all the Bachelor people. It might have been Ashley
and Jared's wedding, Oh.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
My gosh, and that would have been was that when
was that? Was that before twenty twenty yes? Right, twenty
nineteen nineteen, like this summer, And is that when sort
of your bacheloration friendship started? Because I know, obviously you're
super close with a lot of people like Kaylen, and
you are obviously super close and who are else are
(06:45):
kind of like your friends amongst the Bachelor Nation group.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Yeah, Kaylan is probably my best friend from Bachelor Nation,
especially because now they live in Colorado. I'm going to
see her on Saturday. Beca Tilly has always been like
such a great friend me. She is amazing. And then
we see dian A Lot. We've always seen dian A
Lot Wells. Wells has always been a really good friend.
He and I went to the same college too. Yeah,
(07:12):
we Ben has a lot of really good friends from
the Bachelor and I'm really lucky that everyone has like
been so kind and like embraced me so well.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
So well, You're easy to embrace obviously. When I met you,
I was I mean, I feel.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Like I knew of you through.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
The grapevine and stuff, and your reputation is wonderful. Everyone
says you're like the most kind, sweet person and have
the best skin, which is true. I have a book
an appointment with you, and I feel like anyone listening
to this if you have skin or beauty questions, I
feel like you need to head over to Jess's Instagram
because I feel like You've got all the answers.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Even in person. You're just glowing.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
But it's so fun to see how you're kind of
just like that honorary Bachelor Nation. You kind of just
fit right in. You're not even like an honorary You're
just a part of it now.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
That actually means a lot, because it definitely is like intimidating.
I don't know if you felt that way after getting
off the show and then you're kind of thrust into things.
But it's a lot of people. Everyone is like, very
good looking, and you don't know if they're gonna be
nice or not, and most people are and it's just
it's a crazy world. But I mean same with you.
(08:22):
Everyone was like, You're gonna love Susie and I was like, hey,
why can't meet to meet her? And we had such
a blast.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
But so much fun.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
I'm curious your thoughts on dating shows. Do you think
that they are a legitimate way to find love?
Speaker 1 (08:37):
That's a good question. What's so funny is I talk
to my clients about this a lot because most of
my clients in my skincare clinic are women, and a
lot of them are like, should I go on the Bachelor?
Speaker 3 (08:47):
And I'm like, Dan, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
It just depends on what you want because it works
for some people, like you really do see it happen,
even like Kaylin and Dean, but then it doesn't work
for a lot of people. But it's almost like a
dating app, like you're gonna go on a lot of
dates before you find your person. And I never thought
I would find my husband on Instagram. So if you're
(09:10):
going to find him on a TV show, like, go
for it. But I think you have to go into
it like expecting the worst maybe and being pleasantly surprised.
But it's almost like a moment of like what do
I have to lose? I know that was where Ben
was at when he went on the show, was like
I've got nothing else going on, like why not? And
if it works, it works, and if it doesn't, it doesn't.
(09:31):
So things like holding it all loosely so true.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
And have you watched Ben's season?
Speaker 1 (09:37):
No?
Speaker 3 (09:37):
Ever?
Speaker 1 (09:38):
No? So I my mom reminded me, like after bed
and I had been dating for several months, She's like,
you know, you've seen an episode of his Bachelor season?
Like I was home and it was on because my
family would watch it, and I was home from college
and it was on and I saw him and she
said that she remembers because I looked at the TV
(10:00):
screen and I was like, he's really cute. That's the
kind of guy I would date, And like that was
all I ever said about it. And I don't even remember.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
Oh my gosh, she's that crazy. I like low key manifested,
but I got chills. I'm not vocal because it's cold
in my hotel room or the story just gave me chills,
but that's actually kind of crazy.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Yeah, But I never went back and watched his season
after we started dating, like the whole thing, because it's
one thing to know that the person you're with has
had an X or x's or done whatever. It's another thing.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
To watch it.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
And I just I don't think.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
It would be healthy. Honestly.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I can attest to that because when I was coming
off the show, I was with the guy that was
the Bachelor, and I felt like I had to watch
it back because it was also what was airing of myself.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
So I was like, I can't be unaware of what's.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Being shown and the narrative of like what we're seeing
as the public versus what my reality was. But it
was really hard to like want back the person you're
in a relationship with like fall in love or date
or have express feelings to other people. So I totally
get that. And I'm always curious people that have been
the Bachelor or Bachelorette and then they're in new relationships.
(11:13):
I'm always like, do people go back and watch like
their partners?
Speaker 3 (11:17):
Do they go back?
Speaker 1 (11:18):
I can't imagine, Like I I saw a clip one
time of him talking to one of like the last
girls on his season, and he was like looking at
her the way he was looking at me, and I
was like, I cannot do this like that. That is crazy.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
That is crazy.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
When you look at it from where you guys are
at now, like how far you've come, and you think
about contextually, it's like when you're on the show, it's
such a short period of time. And even though I think,
you know, Clayton said that he was in love with
me at that point, I'm like, based on where we
got later in our relationship or different relationships outside, It's
like you might think you love somebody or you might
feel certain things in the moment, but like I feel
(12:07):
like time and like having a real life relationship is
how those things really build, and then you have those
moments where like, oh, I totally thought that was love,
but it really wasn't, and it's just crazy that works out.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
That's so interesting. I feel like I haven't heard a
lot of it from the women's perspective either because I
talked to Ben about it, but.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Yeah, it's really interesting.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
I also think like because Ben Ben was the bachelor
two years before I met him, maybe longer than that,
and now we've been together for five, so it feels
like less and less kind of significant to our relationship.
Like right when we started dating, I was like very
insecure about it, very worried about being compared to his ex,
(12:51):
like all of those things were like all consuming. But
then the farther you get away, the more you're like,
oh no, you.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
Like it's just us.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
But it took a while to get there.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
And also I think I don't know if you've if
you have this experience, but I feel like it's one
thing to have, like you said, to have a boyfriend
or fiance husband and then they haven't experts another thing
to probably constantly get asked about it like I'm doing
in this interview asking you questions about.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
The past, where people just keep.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
Revisiting this narrative because that's what people saw on TV.
And I feel like people probably have no clue how
hard it is to navigate like post TV show relationships,
whether you were on it or if you're dating somebody
that was on it.
Speaker 3 (13:37):
What would be like your best advice for.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
Somebody that is dating a former bachelor or bachelorette.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah, I love that such a niche group, but I
stick together, honestly, I would say, like, I mean, first
of all, I love that I didn't watch it because
I think that that would have really messed with my
head in a different way. And then like, remember that
they're with you for a reason, Like it didn't work
out with the other people for a reason, and not
(14:07):
because those people are bad people by any means. Most
of the people I've met from Ben season are some
of my favorite girls of all time. But it's just
like there's a reason why it worked with me and
not them, And saying with the people that they're with
now you know what I mean. So I think just
like staying really confident and true to who you are
(14:28):
and focusing on your own relationship, which when I started
dating Ben, I had a mentor and she told me, like,
wake up in the morning, and remind yourself like what
is true today and go through the truths of today.
So like today Ben is your boyfriend, you live in Nashville,
you work for this company, and like going through like
those truths helps a lot too.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
That's so powerful. Like that's powerful beyond dating.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
That's so important, whether it's like anxiety or you know,
work trouble, because I feel like so many people get
caught up on like thinking. And I know even as
you're saying, I'm like, oh, I should do that for
myself because there's so many things happening and if you
can just like bring yourself back to reality and kind
of like touch grass, then so many things evaporate from
(15:14):
that realm of like the emotional side that causes anxiety
or stress and like all the negativity totally.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
And I'm like a future tripper. So I still do
that to this day. I'll wake up and be like
I don't need to worry about that because today I'm
waking up, I'm going to work, I'm walking my dog.
Like that's my truth for today. And like you said,
it's very like grounding.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Yes, that's so true. Okay, well besides the Bachelor stuff.
I know you obviously get to travel with Ben occasionally
to some of these events. Do you enjoy the travel
or do you like being home in Colorado or do
you prefer kind.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
Of a balance.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
I'm more of a balanced person. I love my routine,
I love my home. I do really well when I can,
like find time to rest, learning to rest more, and
traveling can sometimes just make me a little bit anxious,
especially if it's like a go go go lifestyle. Bin's
had the go go lifestyle for like seven years, and
(16:11):
he also works virtually and I work in person, and
so I think that stresses me out a little bit too.
We talk all the time of if it would be
different if my whole practice was virtual instead of in person,
I might not feel so anxious.
Speaker 3 (16:25):
But I also.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
I've never experienced fomo in my life. But I think
I get to the point where I'm like, we'll never
get to have this opportunity again, Like I want to
do it, like the Carmel trip where I met you.
I'm like, what else can I go to a Carmel
by the sea?
Speaker 3 (16:39):
Are you kidding?
Speaker 1 (16:40):
So I definitely try and weigh it in those terms
of will I ever be able to do this again?
And if the answer is maybe not, then I'll do it.
But I always prefer to stay home.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
Such a good way to look at it.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
And there are so many cool things that you get
to do when you're kind of like in this world.
What has been your favorite trip or experience that you
guys have done together, whether it was like brand or
work related, or just something that you guys have done together.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
Right when we started dating, we'd been dating for like
eight months, and he did a golf tournament in Switzerland,
which now I'm looking back and I'm like, that was
really unlike him. He would I don't feel like he
would ever do that again. And I don't know if
it was like a flex, I have no idea, but
he took me to Switzerland and that was like so cool.
(17:29):
I remember thinking like this guy, like who is he?
Speaker 3 (17:33):
And this trip was amazing?
Speaker 1 (17:34):
And so that stands out for sure, And then I'm
trying to think we've done like so many cool things.
I really enjoyed the Carmel trip in Pebble Beach. I
thought that was really fun. Yeah, just like all these
places I never would normally go. Anything that we've done
(17:55):
with iHeart, I mean all of it, Like I don't
regret going on any single trip with him. But the
Switzerland thing, I'm like, that was really wild of you
to do, but it was really fun.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
Honestly, the Switzerland was definitely a flex Like that's pretty wild.
Speaker 3 (18:11):
I feel like a guy flying you to Switzerland.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
Like that's just the next level living in a dream.
If he's like daty guy, he flies you to Switzerland
for a golf tournament, that is wild and.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
That's so not been That's what's weird. It's like that's
not him at all. He's he would never do that
to like impress anybody. And I think he probably wanted
to play in the golf tournament in Switzerland and then
it was like, well, I guess I'll bring my new girlfriend.
Like I don't know, but yeah, we've never done anything
like that since, and we've never really like talked about
doing anything like that since.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
But that was really cool. That's awesome.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
Okay, And then I want to talk a little bit
about your clinic in Colorado, Like what do you specialize in?
I feel like when I saw you last, I was
asking you all the skin questions, But what do you
specialize in? What do you see people for most? And
like what tips and tricks can you give people today
for their skin and to look beautiful and feel beautiful.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
I know, I last time we were together, I was like, no,
we'll FaceTime and go over your skin, and then we
just never did. So we still need to do that,
first of all, because it's my absolute favorite thing. But yeah,
I have a clinic in Denver. I'm an acne specialist,
so I usually start seeing people when they're experiencing acne,
and then we'll get them to a point where that's
not really a main concern anymore, and I'll do things
(19:32):
like micro needling. I have an oxygen facial machine, so
technically I'm a medical asthetician as well, which is really fun.
But I think the biggest tip that I can give
people really is to find like what's personalized to them,
because we're all so uniquely made and you, I mean,
I get overwhelmed seeing like other people's skincare routine, So
(19:53):
I can only imagine not having the knowledge that I
do have in seeing that. I think I would get
so sucked into it. But our skin is so different,
just like our bodies are so different, and like whatever
you prefer is different. So I think finding like paying
attention to your own skin. Even meeting with a professional
and seeing what they would recommend based on your concerns
(20:15):
can be super, super beneficial because otherwise you're just going
to keep on trying things that don't work for you, right.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
And there's so much money in that industry, And I
feel like, I'm sure a lot of people can relate
to this.
Speaker 3 (20:27):
When you see people on Instagram or.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Whatever and I post about things and I try new things,
but I think it can be really intimidating because you're
seeing people that probably have a filter on may or
may not have a filter on, and there's claiming certain
products do certain things. So I think that's such good
advice to like go seek professionally, like somebody professionally and just.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Find out what works for you. That's like, I feel
like everyone can can take that to heart.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
Yeah, And I always have people that are like, You're
going to be so mad that I love this product,
And I'm like, I'm not mad. If you love a product,
if it works for you, it works for you, Like
if you absolutely swear by and is steer them from
the ordinary, like that's amazing. You should keep using it
because it works for your skin. I'll tell you what
I think could be better, but that you know, use
(21:14):
what works for you. It doesn't really matter.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
That's awesome. Well, I think that's all of our questions.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
I mean, thank you so much for joining me and
going through and letting us like pry into your life
and get all the juicy ta the app Oh.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
My gosh, you literally were praying at all. That's such
great questions. So it's really fun to talk about because
it has been a while since I was like the
new kid on the block with the bachelor stuff, so
it's kind of fun to think about again.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
That's good. I'm glad.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
So I'm like, sometimes it feels I don't want to
ask too many of the same things over and over again.
But I'm glad that you enjoyed it, and thank you
for joining us. I know you have to run. Thank
you for doing this on your lunch break.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Oh my gosh, anytime, always always down to chat. Awesome,
Thank you, welcome, bye bye.
Speaker 3 (22:07):
Thank you so much to Jess for joining us.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
It was great to hear the behind the scenes on
how she met Ben and a little bit more about
her life in Colorado. Thank you guys for listening beyond
the Bachelor, We'll see you next time.
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