August 31, 2023 • 23 mins
Amara talks about sharing her kids and parenting life online. The idea of posting cute moments of your kids can be fun, but can it also be too much?
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome, welcome, welcome to the show. I am your girl,
Amada Lera, and you're listening to Exactly Amada, a production
of iHeart. By the way, Thank you guys so much
for tuning in. Forgive me once again. I don't know
if it's the weather. I don't know, no say okay,
tapasta know what's going on. All I know is that
my voice peas coming in and out. By the way,
don't forget to subscribe to the podcast on your favorite
(00:24):
podcast platform, Rate us five stars and leave us a review. Okay,
we love, we love, we love to Go check them
out and see what you're having in your mind. What
are your thoughts about the show? Also, head over to
the YouTube where you can also watch or listen to
the podcast by searching for micro through that podcast and
clicking on Exactly Amada. All right, guys, go ahead and
(00:44):
do that, but listen sid. I know that I've been
doing a lot of parenting podcasts, you know, episodes, and
eventually I'll move into something else. Obviously, this is something
that is new to my life that I obviously am
learning how to do with and handle. And if you're
not a parent, just hear me out. And if you
(01:04):
are a parent, you know exactly what I'm talking about.
But today I want to talk about the pros and
cons of sharing your parenting journey on social media. Y'all
know exactly what I'm talking about, and you know what
I'm going to use a perfect example of someone that
I feel that has received a lot of BackFlash from
posting her parenting you know, methods and the things that
(01:27):
you know she does in her household. Do you guys know, Coco.
Anytime that she posted a video with her daughter on
social media, everybody has something to comment, whether it is
that she gives her daughter kids in the mouth, whether
it was that she was breastfeeding her daughter for way
too long. I think her baby must have been like
three years old and she was still breast feeding, and
people had a lot of opinions about that. And you're,
(01:49):
you know, if you're Nate Cannon, for example, and you
are out here having multiple children with different mothers, but
you have your you know, he has his own method.
You know, he has his own method, He has his
own beliefs, he has his own reasons why he wants
to have a big family. But that also is criticized
amongst social media and everybody else and like that, there's many,
many cases where you can even talk about your children,
(02:13):
post your children on social media. Even what they're wearing
can be a topic of conversation, what they're not wearing,
the type of gifts that they're receiving, the type of
luxury life that they are or not receiving, or living.
Anything can be a topic of conversation for people to
be all up in your business. Even the way that
you want to raise them, religious beliefs, the way you
(02:34):
want to discipline your children. Now, with this whole new
era of gentle parenting, shout out to all of those
that do gentle parenting. You know, if it works for you, amen,
it may not work for everyone, and that's okay too.
You know, personally, I want to stick to the traditional methods,
the ones that my mother used with me, because it
work with me. And yes, we are in a different era,
we are in a different generation. Things have changed. But
(02:57):
I feel that this is only but my personal opinion.
These new methods, these new ways of raising the new generation,
has led up to a lot of disrespect, has led
up to a lot of you know, kids with no discipline,
no vision, no goals. They're not driven a lot of them.
I'm not generalizing, I'm just saying there's a big group
(03:20):
of this new generation that have been raised differently, not
with the morals, principles, and values that a lot of
us from back in the days were raised in or
our grandparents, etc. I really do feel that we have
lost a lot of respect for the elderly, for those
that are older than us, and not only that, just
respect over the world, society, humanity, and I respect everybody's
(03:45):
you know, parenting methods and skills. I just feel like
I personally want to go the tradition away. We're going
to be discussing the benefits of sharing your parenting journey
on social media, the pros and cons right, because there's
also great things about it too, things like just asking
for help on social media. There's a big community of
parents that are willing to give pointers, tips, suggestions on
(04:08):
how to raise your kid, what you should do, what
you shouldn't do, how it can affect them, because that's
another thing the world that we live now. I'm not
saying that before bullying didn't exist, for example, but now
we have more access into actually seeing what's going on.
I also believe that the kids now have more access
to the internet to many other things that do end
(04:29):
up affecting their mental state and can make them behave
in a way that they obviously shouldn't. I feel that
there's also you know, on social media, there's a lot
of pages where they teach you what are the right
methods of raising your kids. You know, there's punishments, there's
like let's sit down and have conversations. There's a lot
of other methods right that you can do. And in
(04:51):
that aspect, I love that social media can be very supportive, right,
But then we also have the other side where you
decide to be a parent, you decide to just share
your experiences, and all of a sudden, it's not just
your family having comments of like, don't put this on
the baby, don't do this this way, don't feed them that,
don't this, don't that. But then now you have a
(05:12):
whole world of people through this social media app who
you don't even know. But for some reason, we continue
to look for validation of these people, and now they're
commenting on the way that you're raising your child or
what you're doing, which, by the way, in many occasions
it has gone all the way to the point of
like you're thinking that you're just doing a post, there's
(05:32):
one post that you thought was funny, that was cute,
that it's just of you and your kid doing whatever
fun activity. In your mind, it can even lead up
to your child being taken away from you. You also
have these people on social media where you're telling them
about your experience, and instead of being a you know,
supportive community, people are just criticizing everything you're doing as
a parent. So, like I said before, it's not just
(05:53):
your family that may criticize you or tell you how
you should raise your kids. But now you have social
media and a whole bunch of people that you don't
even know who the hell they are having opinions about
how you should raise your children. You know, sharing your
parenting journey on social media can be beneficient in many ways.
It can help you connect with other parents who are
going through similar experiences, and it can also help you
(06:13):
build a community of support around you. Sharing your parenting
journey on social media can also help You'll help you
document your child's growth and development, and I think that
that's a beautiful thing because you could always go back,
Like I personally created a page for my daughters. By
the way, go follow them at Las Royal Twins at
Last Royal Twins on Instagram. I basically created a page
(06:37):
for them once they turned three months. They turned three
months and they currently have about two hundred and forty
one thousand followers. People just like to see them grow.
I think that's such a beautiful thing, being able to
showcase their weekly you know growth. Me learning this is
also me sharing my motherhood showcase, seeing how I, from
(07:01):
a woman am became a mother and I'm learning how
to raise these amazing, you know, baby girls that eventually
will be women. But in this same space, I've had
a lot of people criticize me. I had people criticize
me about the sizes of the bowl that they put
on their head. I've had people criticize me about the
dresses that they use. I've had people criticize me about
(07:22):
their clothes being cheap or too expensive. It's not worth
it because people always feel the need to give a
negative comment instead of seeing the fact that while you know,
this person is really taking care of these children, look
how beautiful they got them dressed. Or I love the
pictures that they're posting and I want to clarify something
for all of y'all that is out here on social
(07:44):
media criticizing these parents. First of all, you don't know
what this parent has to go through to raise this child.
You really don't know what this person and this person
overall us the people we post what we want people
to see about us on our social media. That doesn't
mean that is the truth. That doesn't mean that that
is your life. That doesn't mean that that's everything. That
(08:04):
is just some of your truth. That is just part
of the truth. You see what I'm saying. I think
that is important for us to learn to mind our
own damn business. And if you don't have nothing nice
or positive to say, because nobody asked for your opinion
in the first place, That's what I'm saying. It's already
tough out here in these streets. We live in a
tough world already, so then on top of that, have
(08:25):
somebody criticize you. However, there's also some withdrawals of sharing
your parenting journey on social media. A lot of parents,
like myself, we think it is a beautiful thing to
just showcase our babies because we're proud of them. We're
proud of our children. The same with that our parents
(08:47):
were proud of us. But in the world that we
live in, just documenting alone the journey of your child
growing up can be a safety issue as well, because
now we have so many crazy people as well on
social media that we don't know who's looking at the
background in the picture. You know the location, if you
(09:08):
share it, what are they wearing, things that your kids
are familiar to. If you even have a nickname for
your kid. Now you are sharing this information with the world,
And now anybody can just show up to your kids
school and be like whatever you know it is that
you call them, they feel comfortable and automatically just run
over there. There is just so much going on in
(09:29):
this world right now that even sharing your experiences as
a parent on social media with your children is also
a safety issue. You have to be concerned about the uniform.
Be careful if you post the uniform. Be careful of
you show kids with school you're picking them up from.
Be careful if you're showcasing by mistake. You know the
(09:50):
address of where you live, the neighborhood, the house, Be
careful if you're sharing locations if you are currently For example,
I never post in real time. So if you ever
see me be somewhere, I'm really not there anymore. That's
already been happened, maybe a few hours before or a
few days before. A lot of parents, a lot of
(10:11):
people don't know or may not be paying attention to
that and may think, Oh, that's not going to happen
to me. I'm not famous, I'm not knowing who cares
about me. Nobody's watching me. You just never know. So
even posting the experience with oh we're in Disney World
about to get on this right here, right now, you
never know who's watching. And I'm not gonna lie. Sometimes
(10:33):
it's good to just have a detox of social media
because it's just too much going on these days. Like
as a public figure, if you think that you get
backlash in comments, only, imagine putting yourself on my shoes,
where I consistently get backlash from people, whether it is
you know, my life, my career, the things that they
(10:55):
see on TV and they assume that are real. But
in many occasions I be. I know, I'm not supposed
to say this, but I am. The truth of the
matter is if you see someone on TV getting paid
to entertain y'all through a TV show and you believe
everything that you see, then that's just on you. You
get what I'm saying, and you know, that's just on you.
(11:19):
People will believe whatever it is that they see without
actually doing the research, or you know what, not even
doing the research, just using common sense, because if you
just stop for a second, use common sense, then you
think you'll realize that not things just don't add up
and don't make sense. And then that's why I also
respect a lot of parents who choose not to post
(11:40):
their children, not to engage publicly, you know, showcasing their
kids or just having them participate in anything related to
the internet, especially when they're young. I respect people that
do that. I personally grew up as a child star.
I grew up in the public eye. I grew up
in the entertainment industry. So to me, I feel like
I want my daughters to also be you know, part
(12:03):
of my truth, part of my reality. You know, it's
the four of us to the wheel falls, you know,
the wheels fall off, like we move together, we do
things together. I'm trying to create my daughter's platform, Last
Royal Twins. I think I've done a good job so far.
I feel like when they get older. I've worked hard
enough to create a platform where later on, just their
(12:24):
name alone, their brand alone, will hold weight for whatever
it is that they decide to do later on in
their career. And that's how I perceive it. I worked
very hard to be where I am. If I can
just open that door, that avenue, that platform for my
daughters and later on they can decid to do as
they please, then that's what I'm doing. That's me. There's
a lot of parents like me. There's parents like Beyonce
(12:46):
who has, you know, her daughter on stage on tour
with her, and we respect that even though that they
you know, she's received some backlash. She's received some negative
comments about her daughter's performance, her daughter's hair, her daughter's looks,
her daughter's because people love to be negative, the same
way that Kim Kardashian has the same thing with her children,
the same way that there's been many there's been many
(13:09):
artists who have chosen to make their children a public figure.
But with that publicity comes a lot of backlash that
we have to as parents. We have to know how
to educate our children and prepare them for society and
prepare them for the negative the negative comments of the world, right,
I think that that really comes from home, just building
(13:30):
their confidence, building up who they are, letting them know that,
you know, they can feel secure with you, protected by you.
It's just a lot, honestly to deal with, you know,
it's a lot to deal with and something else to who.
I'm not gonna lie. Social media can also be so
time consuming you don't even notice when you are living
more through your social media than you're really living your
(13:52):
real life. You're more concerned and worried about showing this
perfection of a life that really doesn't exist instead of
living your real life. And that also goes for your
parenting skills. I've seen a lot of parents that post,
you know, their kids on this like perfect for the pictures,
but in real life, they're not living that way. You know,
They're over here busy buying the most expensive Jordans or
(14:14):
outfits that they can imagine so that they can look
perfect for this picture for social media, so that society
can approve of their parenting, so this society can approve
of their children's looks or whatever, instead of living real life.
And even myself, yes, I'll post my daughters in a
beautiful photoshoot like I do myself, and then I'll post
(14:35):
them in like diapers and assured and no shoes and
just being regular human beings, being regular babies, and just
living life. I think it's important to showcase the balance
of what it is to be a parent, the balance
of children as well, if you so choose that. Here
comes another one. How can sharing your parenting journeys on
social media help to connect with other parents? Like if
(14:58):
you have been through a situation where you felt like
I need some suggestion. I'm a new mom, I'm a
new dad, I don't know what to do. Do you
rather ask for help on social media or do you
first go to your family, because then even even then
that can be an issue too. You have in many occasions.
You know, our mothers, our fathers meaning their grandparents, have
(15:20):
a lot to say about your parenting skills. You know,
they have their methods of the way that they raised
you and the things that you should do. But at
the same time, the world has changed, right, things have changed,
even though kids haven't. It's all the same thing, but
there's other ways of doing things. So what do you do.
Do you go ask for help with them? Or do
you just you know, mind your own business and let
(15:42):
me just ask social media, because I feel that here,
you know, if they give me an opinion, or if
they have something to say, I won't feel as offended,
I won't care, or whatever the kids may be. How
do you feel you should go about it? Then, something
else I honestly want to know, because that is a
valid question, is how much are you supposed the document? Like?
How much is too much? What can you really say?
(16:11):
How many pictures? There's too many pictures? How many posts
is too many posts? I've seen parents posting videos of
their kids, you know, once they pooped all over their face,
all over the That's something that that child will most
likely have to carry with them for the rest of
their life, right even going into school. You as a
parent may find it funny, but if you really look
into how it can affect your child's life in the
long run, it really can. You know. I've seen a
(16:36):
parent who posted a video of their kid on the
floor who got approach and put it in their mouth,
and they thought it was funny, so they just said
it a post. For the rest of their life, that child,
you know, is going to have to live with that
information because thanks to the Internet. Things stay here and
forever will remain here, and especially if they are a
public figure, or if they're somebody known, or if they
(16:57):
have a lot of followers, or if the video goes viral,
you know, that's something that they're going to have to
live with. I feel that there's some things that as funny,
as funny as it may seem to you, I don't
think it should be posted on social media. This is
only my opinion as a parent. You have the rights
to do as you please, but if your child is
in an uncomfortable situation, an awkward situation, I don't think
(17:19):
that it's funny to I don't want to say humiliate,
but humiliate your kid for views, likes, and attention. That's
just me. I love to pose my kids on the
most positive lights of them having fun and looking cute
and playing with each other, showing sisterhood. You know, I've
created Last World Twins Empire. My Airbnb is all uplifting
(17:40):
them and on that logo is their faces, is their brand.
I would never do anything that can jeopardize their brand,
their look, what they represent, and what I'm trying to
build for them either right, that's just me, not all
parents are like me, and I respect that, and everybody
has the rights to their opinion and to do as
they please. But I think is important for us is
(18:01):
just be a little bit more considerate when it comes
to the things that you're going to post on social media.
My question is when it comes to parenting, why is
it that we consistently continue to feel as if we
need the approval of social media, the approval of society
and other people we don't even know. Do you know
(18:21):
the level of anxiety that brings to a parent, the
level of anxiety it brings to your child. And also
let's go back into the things that we post on
social media. Let's talk about the older kids as well.
You know, now there's cyberbullying, there's so much things going
on on social media that as parents, we also have
to be careful of what we post because it can
(18:42):
really affect and damage their mental health, their emotional you know, stability,
and it can also get physical because we have children
that don't know how to use their anger and they'll
use it on themselves. We even have kids that we've
seen and I'm talking about general things because a lot
of times we don't think about things but it's right
(19:03):
there in your face. As parents, should we be more
careful on the things that we post on social media
when it comes to our children and our family? As parents,
should we continue to post, you know and just feel
it like this is basically I'm just documenting my child's life.
But even in that process, what can be posted and
what shouldn't be posting? How do we manage these things?
(19:25):
What about the privacy of our children? When do our
children officially have the rights to say I want to
be private, I want a private life. I don't want
this information exposed. As parents, do we listen to them?
When do we listen to them we feel that because
we gave birth to them or we raise them, we
have the rights over their privacy. That is a very important,
(19:46):
you know question, because whenever my children are old enough
to tell me, Mom, I don't want to do this anymore, Mom,
I want to live a private life. Mom, stop posting
me mom on I will do that out of respect
to them, because I think it's important for us as
parents to pay attention and listen to what they are requesting,
because they are too a separate human being and they
(20:06):
have a voice that needs to be listened to, but
till then, when do we know what is the limit?
What is too much? We got to be careful with
sharing personal informations like full names, birth addresses, all those things,
because there's a lot of crazy people out here and
we don't even know who's watching, who's paying attention, who's
documenting all this information. How can we also balance sharing
(20:30):
our parenting journeys with maintaining privacy overall even with our families.
Some things we just have to learn on our own
as parents, and we got to deal with them because
there's no guidebook on how to live your life. There
is no guidebook. There's no like, there's no guidebook on
how to raise your own kid. You figure that out
as you go. So sometimes even the privacy of that
(20:52):
in your household, in your family needs to be there.
This topic can go on and on and on. What
I'm saying is be careful with the online stalkers, with
the online people, with the online looking for you know, acceptance,
looking for validation for people that you don't even know,
even going back and forth commenting with people that you
(21:13):
don't even know about the way that you're raising your
children or the things that you're posting ignore because they
can actually affect you in real life. You're here concerned
about a you know, digital world, and it can affect
who you are, the dynamic of your family, and all
these things in real life. So all I'm saying is,
if you have any opinions, comments, any reviews, anything that
(21:35):
you've been through, any experiences, please let me know. Hit
me up on the reviews because I definitely want to
know your opinion on how do you feel about this topic?
You know, the pros and cons of sharing your parenting
journey on social media? Is it convenient, should we do it,
shouldn't we do it? How much? All that good stuff
I want to know. Anyways, I hope that today's conversation
has been productive and helpful. And if you know someone,
(21:57):
maybe you want to send them this podcast. You want
to share this podcast, this episode and be like, yo,
you should listen to this. What are your thoughts about it?
Because that's what this is. We're a community where we're
just trying to be supportive of each other and really
just try to understand because every day the world keeps
changing and we're changing with it, and no one is perfect.
We're just trying to figure it out, so just like that,
this is just exactly Amata, this is exactly me, and
(22:20):
I'm still exactly trying to figure it out. Once again,
I just want to thank you guys as usual for
listening to Exactly Amada, for being part of this experience,
for supporting me, for listening to me every week. I
love you guys so much. Only if you knew this
really is my family, my exactly Amada family. Thank you
so so much, and make sure to find me on YouTube.
(22:41):
Catch the show by searching for my qua podcast on
YouTube and clicking on exactly Amada. Okay, click on exactly Amada.
Check me out. You can see all the past episodes.
You can watch it or hear whatever works for you. Also,
go follow me on Instagram at Amaa La Nera al
and Amada a l n go check that out and
(23:02):
remember that this has been a production of iheartsmcro through
that podcast network. For more podcasts from My Heart, visit
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
your favorite show. This is your girl, Amada Legra and
you just heard exactly Amada
Welcome, welcome, welcome to the show. I am your girl,
Amada Lera, and you're listening to Exactly Amada, a production
of iHeart. By the way, Thank you guys so much
for tuning in. Forgive me once again. I don't know
if it's the weather. I don't know, no say okay,
tapasta know what's going on. All I know is that
my voice peas coming in and out. By the way,
don't forget to subscribe to the podcast on your favorite
(00:24):
podcast platform, Rate us five stars and leave us a review. Okay,
we love, we love, we love to Go check them
out and see what you're having in your mind. What
are your thoughts about the show? Also, head over to
the YouTube where you can also watch or listen to
the podcast by searching for micro through that podcast and
clicking on Exactly Amada. All right, guys, go ahead and
(00:44):
do that, but listen sid. I know that I've been
doing a lot of parenting podcasts, you know, episodes, and
eventually I'll move into something else. Obviously, this is something
that is new to my life that I obviously am
learning how to do with and handle. And if you're
not a parent, just hear me out. And if you
(01:04):
are a parent, you know exactly what I'm talking about.
But today I want to talk about the pros and
cons of sharing your parenting journey on social media. Y'all
know exactly what I'm talking about, and you know what
I'm going to use a perfect example of someone that
I feel that has received a lot of BackFlash from
posting her parenting you know, methods and the things that
(01:27):
you know she does in her household. Do you guys know, Coco.
Anytime that she posted a video with her daughter on
social media, everybody has something to comment, whether it is
that she gives her daughter kids in the mouth, whether
it was that she was breastfeeding her daughter for way
too long. I think her baby must have been like
three years old and she was still breast feeding, and
people had a lot of opinions about that. And you're,
(01:49):
you know, if you're Nate Cannon, for example, and you
are out here having multiple children with different mothers, but
you have your you know, he has his own method.
You know, he has his own method, He has his
own beliefs, he has his own reasons why he wants
to have a big family. But that also is criticized
amongst social media and everybody else and like that, there's many,
many cases where you can even talk about your children,
(02:13):
post your children on social media. Even what they're wearing
can be a topic of conversation, what they're not wearing,
the type of gifts that they're receiving, the type of
luxury life that they are or not receiving, or living.
Anything can be a topic of conversation for people to
be all up in your business. Even the way that
you want to raise them, religious beliefs, the way you
(02:34):
want to discipline your children. Now, with this whole new
era of gentle parenting, shout out to all of those
that do gentle parenting. You know, if it works for you, amen,
it may not work for everyone, and that's okay too.
You know, personally, I want to stick to the traditional methods,
the ones that my mother used with me, because it
work with me. And yes, we are in a different era,
we are in a different generation. Things have changed. But
(02:57):
I feel that this is only but my personal opinion.
These new methods, these new ways of raising the new generation,
has led up to a lot of disrespect, has led
up to a lot of you know, kids with no discipline,
no vision, no goals. They're not driven a lot of them.
I'm not generalizing, I'm just saying there's a big group
(03:20):
of this new generation that have been raised differently, not
with the morals, principles, and values that a lot of
us from back in the days were raised in or
our grandparents, etc. I really do feel that we have
lost a lot of respect for the elderly, for those
that are older than us, and not only that, just
respect over the world, society, humanity, and I respect everybody's
(03:45):
you know, parenting methods and skills. I just feel like
I personally want to go the tradition away. We're going
to be discussing the benefits of sharing your parenting journey
on social media, the pros and cons right, because there's
also great things about it too, things like just asking
for help on social media. There's a big community of
parents that are willing to give pointers, tips, suggestions on
(04:08):
how to raise your kid, what you should do, what
you shouldn't do, how it can affect them, because that's
another thing the world that we live now. I'm not
saying that before bullying didn't exist, for example, but now
we have more access into actually seeing what's going on.
I also believe that the kids now have more access
to the internet to many other things that do end
(04:29):
up affecting their mental state and can make them behave
in a way that they obviously shouldn't. I feel that
there's also you know, on social media, there's a lot
of pages where they teach you what are the right
methods of raising your kids. You know, there's punishments, there's
like let's sit down and have conversations. There's a lot
of other methods right that you can do. And in
(04:51):
that aspect, I love that social media can be very supportive, right,
But then we also have the other side where you
decide to be a parent, you decide to just share
your experiences, and all of a sudden, it's not just
your family having comments of like, don't put this on
the baby, don't do this this way, don't feed them that,
don't this, don't that. But then now you have a
(05:12):
whole world of people through this social media app who
you don't even know. But for some reason, we continue
to look for validation of these people, and now they're
commenting on the way that you're raising your child or
what you're doing, which, by the way, in many occasions
it has gone all the way to the point of
like you're thinking that you're just doing a post, there's
(05:32):
one post that you thought was funny, that was cute,
that it's just of you and your kid doing whatever
fun activity. In your mind, it can even lead up
to your child being taken away from you. You also
have these people on social media where you're telling them
about your experience, and instead of being a you know,
supportive community, people are just criticizing everything you're doing as
a parent. So, like I said before, it's not just
(05:53):
your family that may criticize you or tell you how
you should raise your kids. But now you have social
media and a whole bunch of people that you don't
even know who the hell they are having opinions about
how you should raise your children. You know, sharing your
parenting journey on social media can be beneficient in many ways.
It can help you connect with other parents who are
going through similar experiences, and it can also help you
(06:13):
build a community of support around you. Sharing your parenting
journey on social media can also help You'll help you
document your child's growth and development, and I think that
that's a beautiful thing because you could always go back,
Like I personally created a page for my daughters. By
the way, go follow them at Las Royal Twins at
Last Royal Twins on Instagram. I basically created a page
(06:37):
for them once they turned three months. They turned three
months and they currently have about two hundred and forty
one thousand followers. People just like to see them grow.
I think that's such a beautiful thing, being able to
showcase their weekly you know growth. Me learning this is
also me sharing my motherhood showcase, seeing how I, from
(07:01):
a woman am became a mother and I'm learning how
to raise these amazing, you know, baby girls that eventually
will be women. But in this same space, I've had
a lot of people criticize me. I had people criticize
me about the sizes of the bowl that they put
on their head. I've had people criticize me about the
dresses that they use. I've had people criticize me about
(07:22):
their clothes being cheap or too expensive. It's not worth
it because people always feel the need to give a
negative comment instead of seeing the fact that while you know,
this person is really taking care of these children, look
how beautiful they got them dressed. Or I love the
pictures that they're posting and I want to clarify something
for all of y'all that is out here on social
(07:44):
media criticizing these parents. First of all, you don't know
what this parent has to go through to raise this child.
You really don't know what this person and this person
overall us the people we post what we want people
to see about us on our social media. That doesn't
mean that is the truth. That doesn't mean that that
is your life. That doesn't mean that that's everything. That
(08:04):
is just some of your truth. That is just part
of the truth. You see what I'm saying. I think
that is important for us to learn to mind our
own damn business. And if you don't have nothing nice
or positive to say, because nobody asked for your opinion
in the first place, That's what I'm saying. It's already
tough out here in these streets. We live in a
tough world already, so then on top of that, have
(08:25):
somebody criticize you. However, there's also some withdrawals of sharing
your parenting journey on social media. A lot of parents,
like myself, we think it is a beautiful thing to
just showcase our babies because we're proud of them. We're
proud of our children. The same with that our parents
(08:47):
were proud of us. But in the world that we
live in, just documenting alone the journey of your child
growing up can be a safety issue as well, because
now we have so many crazy people as well on
social media that we don't know who's looking at the
background in the picture. You know the location, if you
(09:08):
share it, what are they wearing, things that your kids
are familiar to. If you even have a nickname for
your kid. Now you are sharing this information with the world,
And now anybody can just show up to your kids
school and be like whatever you know it is that
you call them, they feel comfortable and automatically just run
over there. There is just so much going on in
(09:29):
this world right now that even sharing your experiences as
a parent on social media with your children is also
a safety issue. You have to be concerned about the uniform.
Be careful if you post the uniform. Be careful of
you show kids with school you're picking them up from.
Be careful if you're showcasing by mistake. You know the
(09:50):
address of where you live, the neighborhood, the house, Be
careful if you're sharing locations if you are currently For example,
I never post in real time. So if you ever
see me be somewhere, I'm really not there anymore. That's
already been happened, maybe a few hours before or a
few days before. A lot of parents, a lot of
(10:11):
people don't know or may not be paying attention to
that and may think, Oh, that's not going to happen
to me. I'm not famous, I'm not knowing who cares
about me. Nobody's watching me. You just never know. So
even posting the experience with oh we're in Disney World
about to get on this right here, right now, you
never know who's watching. And I'm not gonna lie. Sometimes
(10:33):
it's good to just have a detox of social media
because it's just too much going on these days. Like
as a public figure, if you think that you get
backlash in comments, only, imagine putting yourself on my shoes,
where I consistently get backlash from people, whether it is
you know, my life, my career, the things that they
(10:55):
see on TV and they assume that are real. But
in many occasions I be. I know, I'm not supposed
to say this, but I am. The truth of the
matter is if you see someone on TV getting paid
to entertain y'all through a TV show and you believe
everything that you see, then that's just on you. You
get what I'm saying, and you know, that's just on you.
(11:19):
People will believe whatever it is that they see without
actually doing the research, or you know what, not even
doing the research, just using common sense, because if you
just stop for a second, use common sense, then you
think you'll realize that not things just don't add up
and don't make sense. And then that's why I also
respect a lot of parents who choose not to post
(11:40):
their children, not to engage publicly, you know, showcasing their
kids or just having them participate in anything related to
the internet, especially when they're young. I respect people that
do that. I personally grew up as a child star.
I grew up in the public eye. I grew up
in the entertainment industry. So to me, I feel like
I want my daughters to also be you know, part
(12:03):
of my truth, part of my reality. You know, it's
the four of us to the wheel falls, you know,
the wheels fall off, like we move together, we do
things together. I'm trying to create my daughter's platform, Last
Royal Twins. I think I've done a good job so far.
I feel like when they get older. I've worked hard
enough to create a platform where later on, just their
(12:24):
name alone, their brand alone, will hold weight for whatever
it is that they decide to do later on in
their career. And that's how I perceive it. I worked
very hard to be where I am. If I can
just open that door, that avenue, that platform for my
daughters and later on they can decid to do as
they please, then that's what I'm doing. That's me. There's
a lot of parents like me. There's parents like Beyonce
(12:46):
who has, you know, her daughter on stage on tour
with her, and we respect that even though that they
you know, she's received some backlash. She's received some negative
comments about her daughter's performance, her daughter's hair, her daughter's looks,
her daughter's because people love to be negative, the same
way that Kim Kardashian has the same thing with her children,
the same way that there's been many there's been many
(13:09):
artists who have chosen to make their children a public figure.
But with that publicity comes a lot of backlash that
we have to as parents. We have to know how
to educate our children and prepare them for society and
prepare them for the negative the negative comments of the world, right,
I think that that really comes from home, just building
(13:30):
their confidence, building up who they are, letting them know that,
you know, they can feel secure with you, protected by you.
It's just a lot, honestly to deal with, you know,
it's a lot to deal with and something else to who.
I'm not gonna lie. Social media can also be so
time consuming you don't even notice when you are living
more through your social media than you're really living your
(13:52):
real life. You're more concerned and worried about showing this
perfection of a life that really doesn't exist instead of
living your real life. And that also goes for your
parenting skills. I've seen a lot of parents that post,
you know, their kids on this like perfect for the pictures,
but in real life, they're not living that way. You know,
They're over here busy buying the most expensive Jordans or
(14:14):
outfits that they can imagine so that they can look
perfect for this picture for social media, so that society
can approve of their parenting, so this society can approve
of their children's looks or whatever, instead of living real life.
And even myself, yes, I'll post my daughters in a
beautiful photoshoot like I do myself, and then I'll post
(14:35):
them in like diapers and assured and no shoes and
just being regular human beings, being regular babies, and just
living life. I think it's important to showcase the balance
of what it is to be a parent, the balance
of children as well, if you so choose that. Here
comes another one. How can sharing your parenting journeys on
social media help to connect with other parents? Like if
(14:58):
you have been through a situation where you felt like
I need some suggestion. I'm a new mom, I'm a
new dad, I don't know what to do. Do you
rather ask for help on social media or do you
first go to your family, because then even even then
that can be an issue too. You have in many occasions.
You know, our mothers, our fathers meaning their grandparents, have
(15:20):
a lot to say about your parenting skills. You know,
they have their methods of the way that they raised
you and the things that you should do. But at
the same time, the world has changed, right, things have changed,
even though kids haven't. It's all the same thing, but
there's other ways of doing things. So what do you do.
Do you go ask for help with them? Or do
you just you know, mind your own business and let
(15:42):
me just ask social media, because I feel that here,
you know, if they give me an opinion, or if
they have something to say, I won't feel as offended,
I won't care, or whatever the kids may be. How
do you feel you should go about it? Then, something
else I honestly want to know, because that is a
valid question, is how much are you supposed the document? Like?
How much is too much? What can you really say?
(16:11):
How many pictures? There's too many pictures? How many posts
is too many posts? I've seen parents posting videos of
their kids, you know, once they pooped all over their face,
all over the That's something that that child will most
likely have to carry with them for the rest of
their life, right even going into school. You as a
parent may find it funny, but if you really look
into how it can affect your child's life in the
long run, it really can. You know. I've seen a
(16:36):
parent who posted a video of their kid on the
floor who got approach and put it in their mouth,
and they thought it was funny, so they just said
it a post. For the rest of their life, that child,
you know, is going to have to live with that
information because thanks to the Internet. Things stay here and
forever will remain here, and especially if they are a
public figure, or if they're somebody known, or if they
(16:57):
have a lot of followers, or if the video goes viral,
you know, that's something that they're going to have to
live with. I feel that there's some things that as funny,
as funny as it may seem to you, I don't
think it should be posted on social media. This is
only my opinion as a parent. You have the rights
to do as you please, but if your child is
in an uncomfortable situation, an awkward situation, I don't think
(17:19):
that it's funny to I don't want to say humiliate,
but humiliate your kid for views, likes, and attention. That's
just me. I love to pose my kids on the
most positive lights of them having fun and looking cute
and playing with each other, showing sisterhood. You know, I've
created Last World Twins Empire. My Airbnb is all uplifting
(17:40):
them and on that logo is their faces, is their brand.
I would never do anything that can jeopardize their brand,
their look, what they represent, and what I'm trying to
build for them either right, that's just me, not all
parents are like me, and I respect that, and everybody
has the rights to their opinion and to do as
they please. But I think is important for us is
(18:01):
just be a little bit more considerate when it comes
to the things that you're going to post on social media.
My question is when it comes to parenting, why is
it that we consistently continue to feel as if we
need the approval of social media, the approval of society
and other people we don't even know. Do you know
(18:21):
the level of anxiety that brings to a parent, the
level of anxiety it brings to your child. And also
let's go back into the things that we post on
social media. Let's talk about the older kids as well.
You know, now there's cyberbullying, there's so much things going
on on social media that as parents, we also have
to be careful of what we post because it can
(18:42):
really affect and damage their mental health, their emotional you know, stability,
and it can also get physical because we have children
that don't know how to use their anger and they'll
use it on themselves. We even have kids that we've
seen and I'm talking about general things because a lot
of times we don't think about things but it's right
(19:03):
there in your face. As parents, should we be more
careful on the things that we post on social media
when it comes to our children and our family? As parents,
should we continue to post, you know and just feel
it like this is basically I'm just documenting my child's life.
But even in that process, what can be posted and
what shouldn't be posting? How do we manage these things?
(19:25):
What about the privacy of our children? When do our
children officially have the rights to say I want to
be private, I want a private life. I don't want
this information exposed. As parents, do we listen to them?
When do we listen to them we feel that because
we gave birth to them or we raise them, we
have the rights over their privacy. That is a very important,
(19:46):
you know question, because whenever my children are old enough
to tell me, Mom, I don't want to do this anymore, Mom,
I want to live a private life. Mom, stop posting
me mom on I will do that out of respect
to them, because I think it's important for us as
parents to pay attention and listen to what they are requesting,
because they are too a separate human being and they
(20:06):
have a voice that needs to be listened to, but
till then, when do we know what is the limit?
What is too much? We got to be careful with
sharing personal informations like full names, birth addresses, all those things,
because there's a lot of crazy people out here and
we don't even know who's watching, who's paying attention, who's
documenting all this information. How can we also balance sharing
(20:30):
our parenting journeys with maintaining privacy overall even with our families.
Some things we just have to learn on our own
as parents, and we got to deal with them because
there's no guidebook on how to live your life. There
is no guidebook. There's no like, there's no guidebook on
how to raise your own kid. You figure that out
as you go. So sometimes even the privacy of that
(20:52):
in your household, in your family needs to be there.
This topic can go on and on and on. What
I'm saying is be careful with the online stalkers, with
the online people, with the online looking for you know, acceptance,
looking for validation for people that you don't even know,
even going back and forth commenting with people that you
(21:13):
don't even know about the way that you're raising your
children or the things that you're posting ignore because they
can actually affect you in real life. You're here concerned
about a you know, digital world, and it can affect
who you are, the dynamic of your family, and all
these things in real life. So all I'm saying is,
if you have any opinions, comments, any reviews, anything that
(21:35):
you've been through, any experiences, please let me know. Hit
me up on the reviews because I definitely want to
know your opinion on how do you feel about this topic?
You know, the pros and cons of sharing your parenting
journey on social media? Is it convenient, should we do it,
shouldn't we do it? How much? All that good stuff
I want to know. Anyways, I hope that today's conversation
has been productive and helpful. And if you know someone,
(21:57):
maybe you want to send them this podcast. You want
to share this podcast, this episode and be like, yo,
you should listen to this. What are your thoughts about it?
Because that's what this is. We're a community where we're
just trying to be supportive of each other and really
just try to understand because every day the world keeps
changing and we're changing with it, and no one is perfect.
We're just trying to figure it out, so just like that,
this is just exactly Amata, this is exactly me, and
(22:20):
I'm still exactly trying to figure it out. Once again,
I just want to thank you guys as usual for
listening to Exactly Amada, for being part of this experience,
for supporting me, for listening to me every week. I
love you guys so much. Only if you knew this
really is my family, my exactly Amada family. Thank you
so so much, and make sure to find me on YouTube.
(22:41):
Catch the show by searching for my qua podcast on
YouTube and clicking on exactly Amada. Okay, click on exactly Amada.
Check me out. You can see all the past episodes.
You can watch it or hear whatever works for you. Also,
go follow me on Instagram at Amaa La Nera al
and Amada a l n go check that out and
(23:02):
remember that this has been a production of iheartsmcro through
that podcast network. For more podcasts from My Heart, visit
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
your favorite show. This is your girl, Amada Legra and
you just heard exactly Amada
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