April 25, 2024 • 29 mins
Ros and Eric welcome television, personality, lifestyle expert, podcast host, and New York Times best selling author, and former Bachelorette Hanna Brown to the show. Today we talk romance as Hannah has a new book coming out called “Mistakes We Never Made”. Her jump into romance novels comes almost naturally and seems therapeutic for her. Ros and Eric dive deep with her to find out what has motivated her, how therapy has helped her relationships all around, and how her writing has self reflection.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is he said, Aya Dho with Eric Winter and Rodalind.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Fantaz, welcome to another fun episode, and he said, ayad Ho, Hi, Comsta,
we have another great guest. We're excited to have her
on the show today. She has been on our television
screens for the last few years, starring as a bachelorette
looking for love to keeping it tough, and graduating the
course as a recruit on Special Forces.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
She has fought through being criticized for her words, has
shown tremendous adversity, and has always challenged who people thought
she was by showing how much of a strong woman
she really is.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
She is now taking pen to paper and using her
experience in romance to write, let's welcome Hannah Brown.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Hi, how are you, y'all?
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I'm great. I just got down with the pottery class,
so I'm just kind of.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Like, it's okay, nice pottery, that's beautiful, a little.
Speaker 4 (00:59):
Pottery back in the time. First class?
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Was your first one? Was it good? Relaxing or like
a stressful?
Speaker 3 (01:07):
I would say more stressful. My therapist actually encouraged me
to do this because I don't do anything creative when
it comes to like rsrs like drawing or painting or anything,
because I have like this creative wound that happened in
first grade when I made a watercolor Easter egg and
(01:28):
it turned brown in any way, I literally would have
always just been like, oh I can't. I'm not artistic
in that way interesting, And so she was like, we're
all creative, Like that's part of like what makes it Like,
that's a big part of our humanity. And I really
think you should push yourself and do some type of art.
(01:52):
Pick pick something, but you need to like commit to
doing something and push yourself. So I picked pottery.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Because you love the movie Ghost Is.
Speaker 4 (02:01):
Every time I think about it feel such a romantic hobby.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Oh my god, totally.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
It's yeah, it's definitely just like iconic scene and it
looks fun like doing the wheel. I'm like, this is
gonna be great. No. I it was just like staring
at it and I was like, I don't do Are.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
You're going to do it again?
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Though?
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Are you going to continue?
Speaker 3 (02:29):
I'm gonna keep going. But I was like I'm going
to pay. I need to pay somebody to sit right
beside me the whole time. Like I it was a
bigger class and you can just it was. It was
definitely hard for me to tap into that part of myself.
But I'm going to keep going and I'm going to
keep trying.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
You need to listen. I'll tell you it's very funny.
I did a little pottery back in junior high. I'm
not kidding, and I always to this day. I still
remember pottery class because it's so dam I'm hard.
Speaker 4 (03:01):
To get that.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
You put the freaking clay on there and the things spinning,
and you gotta hold it really tight to make it center.
And yeah, if you're not centered, as soon as you
start put their finger in like they're like, it starts
to open up right and make like a bowl or
whatever you're doing. If you're just slightly off, the thing
starts going like this and starts whipping stuff everywhere.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
Oh yeah, so we were just trying to i'mate a ball.
It's not good.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Don't say that.
Speaker 3 (03:29):
Go to you.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
You gotta go back to kindergarten when you do the egg.
Don't say that. I say, you know what it's isn't
it's pretty, but it could be better.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Yes, you know, it's it's my starting place exactly.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
So you got can ask you something like a little
bit more intimate, because it's interesting that we opened the
conversation about my therapist recommended for me to do this.
So I'm assuming you are a believer that therapy is
actually effective and it's something that you like doing.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
Oh my gosh, Yes, I am a big believer in therapy.
I didn't grow up that way. I didn't know anyone
who went to therapy, and it wasn't until twenty twenty
that I even started going to therapy myself. But it
has been so helpful for me. It's been hard. I mean,
there's a reason why we like push things down to
(04:16):
protect us, you know, and to bring those things back up.
It's not always fun. But I do think that it
has helped me in a lot of ways, like grow
as a person, push myself, be able to have more
authentic conversations with people, show up more vulnerably, and create
better connections. So yeah, I'm a big believer in it.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
I'm with you. I'm a big Belieley.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
You were more open to it because you have you
study psychology.
Speaker 4 (04:46):
I have a degree in psychology.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Yeah, when I met him, it was more of like,
really okay, but he's a big communicator, so he really
wanted to explore therapy, and then I went along, and
I have to say that it's been really wonderful.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
But it's about finding the right therapy too, because that
is so hard and so important.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
One thousand percent. So I because I feel like sometimes
they can it can hurt you. I think if you
don't have the right therapist that can really guide you
and like help you be in a growth mindset about it.
And actually my fiance and I started doing couples therapy
and our couples therapy, she also does individual therapy with us,
(05:28):
and it has been I had a therapist before, and
I had okay experiences, but I kind of found myself
in loops sometimes of not really like seeing progress. And
this therapist has been like incredible. It's been really immersive
and she's been like very in it with us. But
(05:50):
it's been so great for us individually. And then adds
a couple like, I wish everyone could have our therapists
for how much she's helped us be able to like
really effectively communicate and like show up more vulnerably because
we're engaged, and so some people are like, oh, are
you in therapy? I feel like for us, we want
(06:15):
we're preparing for, like we're preparing for a marriage, so
we want to have a successful, lasting marriage, So how
can we, like, you know, instead of that first your marriage,
everybody says it's like the worst, Like how can we
really be ready for that? And to be able to
learn now how to effectually communicate be there for each other.
(06:35):
And it's been awesome.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
It's very smart.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
And once you find a good therapist, which sounds like
you found one, you stick to them. The starting over
is a pain of the butt, trying to explain everything
to somebody all over again, and you're like, well, if
you can just get the cliff notes from the last therapist,
because there is a lot of work so back when
I was not you're.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Just doing it all over again.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
I'm glad you found a good one and it's great.
It's great for you guys, and I think it gets
incredibly smart. We both have been married. This is our
second marriage for us in general. She was married once before,
I was married once before, and I think going in
with that sort of foundation of understanding, like you said,
the first year can be tough, but if you work
through a lot of those kings early, then the first
(07:16):
year could be the true honeymoon period. You know, you
could just enjoy it because you've done all that work
leading in.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Can I tell you a funny story? I don't know
even I ever told you this. So yes, I was
married before and just for three years, actually a year
and a half because the other year and a half
were separated, but it was three years total. So pretty
early on I realized this is just not good. I
was young. I didn't have the tools or the resources
(07:43):
to be able to understand what was happening. So I
went to my manager at the time, said, you need
to go to a therapist. So I found she found
me this man, this guy that is a therapist in
Brentwood on the afrigat. So I go and I started
talking the truth about Listen, he is verbally abusive. He's like,
(08:03):
you know what, he's very very jealous, So when we
go out, if anybody looks at me, I was just
talking about the dynamics of how can I navigate this
whole thing, because I don't even know what to do
with somebody that is like that out of control. So
he dropped me the therapist. Why Yeah, After like three sessions,
he said, I think I told him the story. We
(08:24):
went to a restaurant and somebody was looking at me
and he got up and he wanted to start a fight.
And he's like, you know, I can't see you anymore
because I fear it from my life. I'm not joking.
I'm not joking, And I'm like, he's not gonna do
anything to you, sir, And he's never done anything to me.
Speaker 3 (08:39):
You know.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
I'm just saying that, how do I navigate somebody that
is has a bit of a temper or somebody that
you know is so wounded, because that's the reality. He
was a very wounded of human being. How can I help?
And he said, I can't see you anymore.
Speaker 4 (08:53):
The first person that has dropped from a therapist dropped me.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
I don't want to see you any I can't. Yeah.
I was shocked, so I think after that I never
went back to it. I was like, this is like
a joke, Like I'm here for support and you're telling
me you can know to help me. Like I'm not
saying that this guy is a freaking lunatic that is
going to come here. It is outside waiting, you know.
I mean, like I'm just talking about he got scared
(09:18):
and I think that the first time you brought to
me therapy, I just kept going back to for why
I don't trust them.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
I love I love that we're talking so much about
relationships and romance right now because it actually ties in
great with your book. But I also want to talk
about Obviously, you did The Bachelorette, did a lot of
that stuff. I don't know if people understand what that
experience might be like for somebody going through dating relationships.
It's totally unnatural in the scope of anybody else thinking
(09:50):
about dating.
Speaker 4 (09:51):
So has that been beneficial?
Speaker 2 (09:54):
I think in the long run finding now your fiance
and being in a relationship and being happy and ready
to go.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
And obviously it's contributed to the book we're about to
talk about too. I'm sure.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Just tell me a little bit about that whole journey,
because I've always wondered what it would be like to
be on a show like that.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
I feel like it's beneficial because do you have like
a lot of life in like a short amount of time,
and you get to meet a lot of different people
figure out some of your dating dynamics. However, I definitely
think they're there can be a lot of wounds created
in that type of space of dating, you know, like
(10:35):
trust issues for sure, like, really does somebody want to
be with me? Why do they want to be with me?
What are their intentions? I think I was really jaded
from that situation, honestly when I got back into dating
kind of after the show, and I really had to
like work through that. Even when I met my fiance,
(10:57):
like I did not take it seriously at all, even
though he was like such a great guy. I just
couldn't understand like that this person would really like love
me for all parts of me. And I think a
lot of that started probably before the show, but I
(11:17):
feel like got like exasperbated being on a show like that,
and so it helped me learn a lot about myself.
And I have a lot of great stories and inspiration
to draw all of when it comes to creating you know,
a book or different things, you know, storytelling for sure,
(11:42):
But as far as like when people ask like, oh,
should I do a show like that, I'm like, I
think there's a lot of different ways that we can
learn about ourselves and growing relationship that maybe doesn't have
to do with you know, dating thirty minute at one
time for a few months on to you in the
(12:02):
same breath. I'm really grateful for it, Like I know
that was my path, but there's definitely been a lot
that I've had to like unlearn, relearn and grow, and
thank goodness, I found like the best partner to do
that with. And I think it matured me a lot
in a lot of ways to be able to like
(12:22):
genuinely be ready to like do the work that I
think it takes to like really have a successful relationship.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
So it makes sense.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
The you know, the Bachelor and Bachelorette universe is massive.
You know, it's almost like this incredible community. You know, well,
have you did you find any lifelong friendships, you know,
with girls or guys that that there saw the people
that you're like, you know what, this is my girl
for forever, you know.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
Yeah, one of my best girlfriends Now she lives in
San Diego, but we met on the show when I
was contestant, and she's like one of the best human
beings I know. And it's just fun because we have
like such this like odd experience that we went on
together and have seen how both of our lives have
changed and how we've grown. And I'm super thankful for
(13:17):
that I'm thankful for the show because, like, I had
never been out of the country before. You know, you
get to travel everywhere, and it really like expanded my
view of the world of being able to date all
different types of people. I'm from a small town in
Alabama where like everybody knows everybody, and I went to
college like fifteen minutes away from where I grew up,
(13:39):
so like I lived in such a bubble, and so
being able to go on the show and be able
to like see so many different ways of life and
meet people from different places and see how you're like
you can find connections and find attraction for people that
you've never like you have such different backgrounds was really cool.
And that's also in like friendship as well.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
Did you always want to be in the spotlight? Because
obviously you get picked to a reality show, right, people
don't fully understand if you go as far as you
went in that process, you become famous, right and with that,
and there's pluses you can get out there and if
you had passions of writing, there's things that helps open doors, right,
But there's also minus is that now your life is
(14:32):
exposed to a lot of people, You're being judged you
got this, you got that. Obviously, you probably don't regret
any of it. It's been a great journey for you.
But is that something you were prepared for and always
wanted to do or it was like, Hey, I'm going
to sign up for the Bachelor and let's see what happens, y'all.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
I was so naive to the whole thing. I didn't
even sign myself up. I got like a random call
one day and thought it was a joke, and I was.
I was. I did pageants when I was younger, and
that's how I kind of started. I was competing in
Miss USA and and it was like a videographer that
(15:11):
I was talking with, like we were talking about my relationships.
She randomly decided to sign me up for the Bachelor,
Like I don't know why didn't tell me? And I
get this random call and I started calling all my
friends and being like, what's what is going on? Like
we we don't know what you're talking about, but we
think you should do it. And I kind of went
back and forth in my mom. I was living at
(15:33):
home at the time, so like right after college, and
she was just like, just do it, Like there's so
many girls go to that one like audition, like who knows.
So it's crazy that I ended up where I was
because I I remember they made me do like a
video like where they gave it like a question and
want us to answer it. Like they still make fun
(15:55):
of my video because I like set my phone up
and there's like this big streak of like light on
my face as an in front of a window, and
I just took the questions and just read off the
sheet like most people like make these really cool videos.
I just didn't know what I was doing. And yeah,
and then obviously to see myself like become the Bachelorette
(16:16):
and just see like the fandom. Like you said, it's
like such a big like community of people and there's
Bachelor Nation. That's so bag. I was not prepared for
at all. I had done like pageants and was fine performing,
but this was different, like this is like people in
your like intimate moments kind of with you. Yeah, and
(16:37):
I was not prepared for that, just like a blanket statement,
like was not prepared. I think people really liked me
and you know, following my story and you know, I
became the Bachelorette because I don't know how to pretend
to like be okay with it or pretend that I'm
(16:58):
not affected by camera up my nostril. Like I didn't
realize that going in that there's going to be like,
you know, probably five different people and like there's actually
a camera right here while you're talking to a person
right here, and you have to pretend like they're not there.
Like that was really hard for me. So I feel
like people loved that because I wasn't pretending and I
(17:22):
hadn't like came up with this like calculated plan of
realizing that, oh, if I do this, then all these
other dreams that I have could happen. Like I wasn't
thinking that way. I wast thing I was gonna meet.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
My husband, and you think a lot of girls enter
the space that way, Like already with everything calculated, then
I'm gonna portray myself this way so I can get
this out of this.
Speaker 3 (17:43):
I think if you grew up, yeah, I mean I don't.
I don't know how calculated, but I think people who
I wish I would have kind of watched the show before,
like no, like, oh, certain things can come off ways.
There's ways that you can be edited and portray. Yeah,
there's tropes that are on the show, so like making
(18:04):
sure you don't find yourself kind of in that. So
I do think there are The show has been on
for so long, and I do think people probably are aware.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
I just you were not. But that was that was
a beauty of it because you were honest and transparent
and it was it was organic, and I think that's
why people related. It was relatable to them, you know,
And that's why people wanted to hug you and and
and and to be around your energy because it was
this I'm just here and I'm here for the ride,
but I don't I'm me, you know, And that was
(18:36):
that was a beauty of it all. Your first book,
kind of God bless this mess. It was a New
York Times bestseller. It was it did so well, and
it was a vehicle for you to just open up
and and and and navigate everything you were going through,
you know, and and amazing journey and learning experiences. And
people liked it a lot. And now you have a
(18:57):
new book and you transition into fiction romance novel Why
are you a fan of romance novels?
Speaker 3 (19:06):
So I could have never imagined people would want want
to hear about my own personal story and that i'd
be able to like have the opportunity to you know, write,
I guess a memoir. I call it my quarter life memoir,
because you know, there's still a lot of life to live,
but what I'd learned up to that point, but something
(19:28):
that I've always wanted to do. I remember being at
the kitchen table with my mom, probably like high school,
maybe the first year of college, like back home, being like,
you know, on like one of the things I just
want to be able to do in days, I want
to be able to like write a book. But at
that point, I wanted to write a book kind of
based on my grandmother's life and have like some roughly
(19:55):
based on her, but then some like romance kind of
thrown into there, you know, kind of have like a
rough idea that hasn't happened. But it's so crazy that
that initial like this is something I want to do,
I'm kind of scared to do. I don't know if
I can fully do. This has now happened and been
able to go into the space of writing a fiction
novel because I'm a big fan of just fiction romance
(20:18):
in general. That's always been my escape in some way.
I love stories and so to be able to have
this opportunity to write this book was an actual dream
come true. All the other things that have happened in
my life I couldn't have ever dreamt up. So this
is really really special to me.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
I love the premise of this book and the title
Mistakes We Never Made. And I love this idea that
you came up with of two people who almost always
got in the mix in some way right, going through
different stages of their life. It's very relatable, very smart
because it is I mean, I know a lot of
people that just almost it was the right fit, almost
(20:58):
the right timeing things just never quite worked, and you
always wonder what if right, Yeah, and then they get
this chance to meet again at a wedding, and then
I love the twist and all that of where that goes.
What was the process to come up with something like this?
Obviously different than the story you were just saying, So
what led you to this?
Speaker 3 (21:21):
Well? I kind of drew off different feelings and places
I've been in my own life. The premise at first, well,
and it originally started to be a young adult series,
and then that kind of got like that idea got
kind of pushed to the side, and then was like,
that's not really where I'm at my life. So maybe
(21:44):
I just want to like really draw off inspiration and
experiences I've been through, people around me have been through.
And so with this book in particular, I wanted the
main character. And actually there's a group of friends in
the book, and each one of them, I would say,
(22:04):
is a part of me, if that makes sense, Like
Emma is a part of me that wants to have
everything like under control, wants to be able to kind
of more like this part is me kind of walls
but like type A just that's it's kind of how
I navigated life, Like when I was I was younger,
I just wanted to excel and be good and have
(22:27):
more control over things. And we started I start off
with her book, but all the other girls I kind
of have a part of me. So that's how I
like draw inspiration from, Like how would I be in
these certain situations, So kind of that's where I go
with that. Then this this relationship between Emaf and I
(22:51):
feel like there's been a lot of times where in
my life I've I've been in our relationship or been
dating someone that like they're great, but there's just something
that's off with him or me and it just like
doesn't work out. And I thought it'd be really cool to,
like you said, like kind of dive intoto, like what
would that be like if these two people could come
(23:17):
together and see what happens when they're put in this
like very interesting situation.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
Like an extreme they have.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
To find the best their mutual best friend who is
the runaway bride, and they are kind of not on
the best speaking terms at the point from all the
different times in their past that just things haven't worked out,
and now they have to go on a wild goose
chase to try to help their friend not make a
(23:48):
horrible decision. And it's fun to be able to see,
like how are they going to navigate that uncomfortable conversation
of like where they're at now? Will they be able
to actually have the courage, I feel like to take
the risk of actually saying how you feel, whether that's
you feel hurt and this person has you know, made
(24:10):
you feel portrayed or has made you start questioning things
about yourself, Like having that conversation and confronting somebody about
that that you actually care about can be really tough.
So you know, we get to see if Emma and Finn,
the main characters, well to take the risk to kind
of confront each other and actually say how they feel
(24:30):
and actually take the chance, if given the right opportunity,
to like make this thing work.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
Do you see it as a series?
Speaker 3 (24:39):
I do so. It's actually already a two book series
at at this moment.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
Oh it is? Okay? Is it out? I apologize? Is
it out already or not yet? When is it coming out?
Speaker 3 (24:54):
This the first book comes out May seventh, okay, and
then I'm already working on the second book. But kind
of how I said, like the girls are are different
parts to me, and I'll can you know, continue the
series with the second book kind of going into one
of the other characters that I hope that you get
(25:14):
really invested in in this book and want to know
more what happened.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Do you have people approaching you to make it into
a movie.
Speaker 4 (25:22):
Or a series? It could be a very fun run.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Yeah, because I'm assuming because because you're a big name
in the country in America, that's the.
Speaker 3 (25:29):
Goal, and that was that was the thought behind writing
the book. Just in general, like a lot of times,
you know, they're we've took a lot of time, and
I had a great team with me to really think
about how would this visually, how could this translate? How
(25:49):
what type of high stakes the speed of which the
book goes like, how can we translate that, hopefully for
a bigger screen.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Have you heard of? Have you heard of? And I
don't mean to do a plug to to this streamer?
Have you have you heard of Passion Flicks? No, So,
Passion Flicks is Tosca Mosque. Elon Musk's his sister. She's
a director, producer and she's been added for a long
time and she opened her own streamer called Passion Flicks.
(26:24):
And all they do is romance novels. The entire every
single movie it's about. She basically acquires IP like like
that exists, but it's all Roman romance novels. And the
female demo, I guess, is humongous. And I'm telling you
this because it's so interesting. I just I just did
(26:44):
a movie for her called Wallbanger, that is a series
of three and they have a big screening in Puerto
Rico in a couple of weeks because they do the
Passion Flicks convention and women from all over the world
travel to whatever the convention is. I had no idea
about this world and no idea about Passion Flicks, and
I just go called the good offer to do this
movie and it was very cute, and I thought it
(27:05):
was such a smart thing. I'm going to have a
streaming app that is just for basically for women about
romance novels. And the movies are really well done. I'm
very cute.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
But would you define your book more as a romance
novel or rom com?
Speaker 3 (27:18):
I would love to see it more as a traditional
rom com because that's what I love the most. But
I think, yeah, I would definitely say it's more of
a rom comed It's like, it's fun. I want people
to be like laughing along and feel like this is
just something they can gobble up while they're on like
(27:39):
their summer.
Speaker 4 (27:40):
I think you're gonna have options based on this premise.
I think you're gonna have options. I really hope that
you get to take this to the big screen. That'd
be really fun. Yeah, and good luck with your second book.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
Thank you. Yeah, I mean I would love to. You know,
I have been on TV before and off obviously seeing
that side of the other side of production, and I
would love to be able to dabble on that and
be really cool to be able to do that with
my own content. So that's the goal. But I know
(28:10):
that that's the goal for a lot of people. But
you know, in the I'm really just excited for people
to like get to fall in love with this world
and get lost in the story. And I think it'll be,
like I said, like a really great summer read that
I'm I'm just super proud of it and really humped
for people who like love this genre to be I
(28:33):
hope like surprised by just how much they love it.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
They will, they will love it.
Speaker 4 (28:38):
We're rooting for you.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
I hope the book does amazing. May seventh is when
it's out again. Mistakes we never made awesome.
Speaker 1 (28:46):
Thank you so much, China, You're lovely.
Speaker 3 (28:48):
Thank you. I really appreciate you're having me on.
Speaker 4 (28:51):
Thank you. Nice meeting. Bye, this was great. This is
going to be such a cool book. I think you
love this read.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
I know this.
Speaker 4 (29:03):
She's jamming.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
I love that she's done so much since The Bachelor
and The Bachelorette, both obviously other fun you know, reality shows,
but now diving in for a second book.
Speaker 4 (29:15):
In the writing world, this is this is great.
Speaker 1 (29:17):
Yeah, she's a She's a success story for sure.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
One hundred percent. Well, I'm so glad we had her
on hand. Brown, thank you and uh until next time.
Speaker 3 (29:26):
I love you.
Speaker 4 (29:27):
Thanks for listening. Don't forget to write us a review
and tell us what you think.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
If you want to follow us on Instagram, che goes
out at, he said. Ajason is an email Eric and
Ross at iHeartRadio dot com, he said, is part of
iHeartRadio's Mike wild Up podcast network.
Speaker 4 (29:43):
See you next time.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
I
This is he said, Aya Dho with Eric Winter and Rodalind.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Fantaz, welcome to another fun episode, and he said, ayad Ho, Hi, Comsta,
we have another great guest. We're excited to have her
on the show today. She has been on our television
screens for the last few years, starring as a bachelorette
looking for love to keeping it tough, and graduating the
course as a recruit on Special Forces.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
She has fought through being criticized for her words, has
shown tremendous adversity, and has always challenged who people thought
she was by showing how much of a strong woman
she really is.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
She is now taking pen to paper and using her
experience in romance to write, let's welcome Hannah Brown.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Hi, how are you, y'all?
Speaker 3 (00:48):
I'm great. I just got down with the pottery class,
so I'm just kind of.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Like, it's okay, nice pottery, that's beautiful, a little.
Speaker 4 (00:59):
Pottery back in the time. First class?
Speaker 1 (01:01):
Was your first one? Was it good? Relaxing or like
a stressful?
Speaker 3 (01:07):
I would say more stressful. My therapist actually encouraged me
to do this because I don't do anything creative when
it comes to like rsrs like drawing or painting or anything,
because I have like this creative wound that happened in
first grade when I made a watercolor Easter egg and
(01:28):
it turned brown in any way, I literally would have
always just been like, oh I can't. I'm not artistic
in that way interesting, And so she was like, we're
all creative, Like that's part of like what makes it Like,
that's a big part of our humanity. And I really
think you should push yourself and do some type of art.
(01:52):
Pick pick something, but you need to like commit to
doing something and push yourself. So I picked pottery.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Because you love the movie Ghost Is.
Speaker 4 (02:01):
Every time I think about it feel such a romantic hobby.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Oh my god, totally.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
It's yeah, it's definitely just like iconic scene and it
looks fun like doing the wheel. I'm like, this is
gonna be great. No. I it was just like staring
at it and I was like, I don't do Are.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
You're going to do it again?
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Though?
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Are you going to continue?
Speaker 3 (02:29):
I'm gonna keep going. But I was like I'm going
to pay. I need to pay somebody to sit right
beside me the whole time. Like I it was a
bigger class and you can just it was. It was
definitely hard for me to tap into that part of myself.
But I'm going to keep going and I'm going to
keep trying.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
You need to listen. I'll tell you it's very funny.
I did a little pottery back in junior high. I'm
not kidding, and I always to this day. I still
remember pottery class because it's so dam I'm hard.
Speaker 4 (03:01):
To get that.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
You put the freaking clay on there and the things spinning,
and you gotta hold it really tight to make it center.
And yeah, if you're not centered, as soon as you
start put their finger in like they're like, it starts
to open up right and make like a bowl or
whatever you're doing. If you're just slightly off, the thing
starts going like this and starts whipping stuff everywhere.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
Oh yeah, so we were just trying to i'mate a ball.
It's not good.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Don't say that.
Speaker 3 (03:29):
Go to you.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
You gotta go back to kindergarten when you do the egg.
Don't say that. I say, you know what it's isn't
it's pretty, but it could be better.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Yes, you know, it's it's my starting place exactly.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
So you got can ask you something like a little
bit more intimate, because it's interesting that we opened the
conversation about my therapist recommended for me to do this.
So I'm assuming you are a believer that therapy is
actually effective and it's something that you like doing.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
Oh my gosh, Yes, I am a big believer in therapy.
I didn't grow up that way. I didn't know anyone
who went to therapy, and it wasn't until twenty twenty
that I even started going to therapy myself. But it
has been so helpful for me. It's been hard. I mean,
there's a reason why we like push things down to
(04:16):
protect us, you know, and to bring those things back up.
It's not always fun. But I do think that it
has helped me in a lot of ways, like grow
as a person, push myself, be able to have more
authentic conversations with people, show up more vulnerably, and create
better connections. So yeah, I'm a big believer in it.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
I'm with you. I'm a big Belieley.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
You were more open to it because you have you
study psychology.
Speaker 4 (04:46):
I have a degree in psychology.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Yeah, when I met him, it was more of like,
really okay, but he's a big communicator, so he really
wanted to explore therapy, and then I went along, and
I have to say that it's been really wonderful.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
But it's about finding the right therapy too, because that
is so hard and so important.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
One thousand percent. So I because I feel like sometimes
they can it can hurt you. I think if you
don't have the right therapist that can really guide you
and like help you be in a growth mindset about it.
And actually my fiance and I started doing couples therapy
and our couples therapy, she also does individual therapy with us,
(05:28):
and it has been I had a therapist before, and
I had okay experiences, but I kind of found myself
in loops sometimes of not really like seeing progress. And
this therapist has been like incredible. It's been really immersive
and she's been like very in it with us. But
(05:50):
it's been so great for us individually. And then adds
a couple like, I wish everyone could have our therapists
for how much she's helped us be able to like
really effectively communicate and like show up more vulnerably because
we're engaged, and so some people are like, oh, are
you in therapy? I feel like for us, we want
(06:15):
we're preparing for, like we're preparing for a marriage, so
we want to have a successful, lasting marriage, So how
can we, like, you know, instead of that first your marriage,
everybody says it's like the worst, Like how can we
really be ready for that? And to be able to
learn now how to effectually communicate be there for each other.
(06:35):
And it's been awesome.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
It's very smart.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
And once you find a good therapist, which sounds like
you found one, you stick to them. The starting over
is a pain of the butt, trying to explain everything
to somebody all over again, and you're like, well, if
you can just get the cliff notes from the last therapist,
because there is a lot of work so back when
I was not you're.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Just doing it all over again.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
I'm glad you found a good one and it's great.
It's great for you guys, and I think it gets
incredibly smart. We both have been married. This is our
second marriage for us in general. She was married once before,
I was married once before, and I think going in
with that sort of foundation of understanding, like you said,
the first year can be tough, but if you work
through a lot of those kings early, then the first
(07:16):
year could be the true honeymoon period. You know, you
could just enjoy it because you've done all that work
leading in.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Can I tell you a funny story? I don't know
even I ever told you this. So yes, I was
married before and just for three years, actually a year
and a half because the other year and a half
were separated, but it was three years total. So pretty
early on I realized this is just not good. I
was young. I didn't have the tools or the resources
(07:43):
to be able to understand what was happening. So I
went to my manager at the time, said, you need
to go to a therapist. So I found she found
me this man, this guy that is a therapist in
Brentwood on the afrigat. So I go and I started
talking the truth about Listen, he is verbally abusive. He's like,
(08:03):
you know what, he's very very jealous, So when we
go out, if anybody looks at me, I was just
talking about the dynamics of how can I navigate this
whole thing, because I don't even know what to do
with somebody that is like that out of control. So
he dropped me the therapist. Why Yeah, After like three sessions,
he said, I think I told him the story. We
(08:24):
went to a restaurant and somebody was looking at me
and he got up and he wanted to start a fight.
And he's like, you know, I can't see you anymore
because I fear it from my life. I'm not joking.
I'm not joking, And I'm like, he's not gonna do
anything to you, sir, And he's never done anything to me.
Speaker 3 (08:39):
You know.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
I'm just saying that, how do I navigate somebody that
is has a bit of a temper or somebody that
you know is so wounded, because that's the reality. He
was a very wounded of human being. How can I help?
And he said, I can't see you anymore.
Speaker 4 (08:53):
The first person that has dropped from a therapist dropped me.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
I don't want to see you any I can't. Yeah.
I was shocked, so I think after that I never
went back to it. I was like, this is like
a joke, Like I'm here for support and you're telling
me you can know to help me. Like I'm not
saying that this guy is a freaking lunatic that is
going to come here. It is outside waiting, you know.
I mean, like I'm just talking about he got scared
(09:18):
and I think that the first time you brought to
me therapy, I just kept going back to for why
I don't trust them.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
I love I love that we're talking so much about
relationships and romance right now because it actually ties in
great with your book. But I also want to talk
about Obviously, you did The Bachelorette, did a lot of
that stuff. I don't know if people understand what that
experience might be like for somebody going through dating relationships.
It's totally unnatural in the scope of anybody else thinking
(09:50):
about dating.
Speaker 4 (09:51):
So has that been beneficial?
Speaker 2 (09:54):
I think in the long run finding now your fiance
and being in a relationship and being happy and ready
to go.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
And obviously it's contributed to the book we're about to
talk about too. I'm sure.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Just tell me a little bit about that whole journey,
because I've always wondered what it would be like to
be on a show like that.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
I feel like it's beneficial because do you have like
a lot of life in like a short amount of time,
and you get to meet a lot of different people
figure out some of your dating dynamics. However, I definitely
think they're there can be a lot of wounds created
in that type of space of dating, you know, like
(10:35):
trust issues for sure, like, really does somebody want to
be with me? Why do they want to be with me?
What are their intentions? I think I was really jaded
from that situation, honestly when I got back into dating
kind of after the show, and I really had to
like work through that. Even when I met my fiance,
(10:57):
like I did not take it seriously at all, even
though he was like such a great guy. I just
couldn't understand like that this person would really like love
me for all parts of me. And I think a
lot of that started probably before the show, but I
(11:17):
feel like got like exasperbated being on a show like that,
and so it helped me learn a lot about myself.
And I have a lot of great stories and inspiration
to draw all of when it comes to creating you know,
a book or different things, you know, storytelling for sure,
(11:42):
But as far as like when people ask like, oh,
should I do a show like that, I'm like, I
think there's a lot of different ways that we can
learn about ourselves and growing relationship that maybe doesn't have
to do with you know, dating thirty minute at one
time for a few months on to you in the
(12:02):
same breath. I'm really grateful for it, Like I know
that was my path, but there's definitely been a lot
that I've had to like unlearn, relearn and grow, and
thank goodness, I found like the best partner to do
that with. And I think it matured me a lot
in a lot of ways to be able to like
(12:22):
genuinely be ready to like do the work that I
think it takes to like really have a successful relationship.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
So it makes sense.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
The you know, the Bachelor and Bachelorette universe is massive.
You know, it's almost like this incredible community. You know, well,
have you did you find any lifelong friendships, you know,
with girls or guys that that there saw the people
that you're like, you know what, this is my girl
for forever, you know.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
Yeah, one of my best girlfriends Now she lives in
San Diego, but we met on the show when I
was contestant, and she's like one of the best human
beings I know. And it's just fun because we have
like such this like odd experience that we went on
together and have seen how both of our lives have
changed and how we've grown. And I'm super thankful for
(13:17):
that I'm thankful for the show because, like, I had
never been out of the country before. You know, you
get to travel everywhere, and it really like expanded my
view of the world of being able to date all
different types of people. I'm from a small town in
Alabama where like everybody knows everybody, and I went to
college like fifteen minutes away from where I grew up,
(13:39):
so like I lived in such a bubble, and so
being able to go on the show and be able
to like see so many different ways of life and
meet people from different places and see how you're like
you can find connections and find attraction for people that
you've never like you have such different backgrounds was really cool.
And that's also in like friendship as well.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
Did you always want to be in the spotlight? Because
obviously you get picked to a reality show, right, people
don't fully understand if you go as far as you
went in that process, you become famous, right and with that,
and there's pluses you can get out there and if
you had passions of writing, there's things that helps open doors, right,
But there's also minus is that now your life is
(14:32):
exposed to a lot of people, You're being judged you
got this, you got that. Obviously, you probably don't regret
any of it. It's been a great journey for you.
But is that something you were prepared for and always
wanted to do or it was like, Hey, I'm going
to sign up for the Bachelor and let's see what happens, y'all.
Speaker 3 (14:48):
I was so naive to the whole thing. I didn't
even sign myself up. I got like a random call
one day and thought it was a joke, and I was.
I was. I did pageants when I was younger, and
that's how I kind of started. I was competing in
Miss USA and and it was like a videographer that
(15:11):
I was talking with, like we were talking about my relationships.
She randomly decided to sign me up for the Bachelor,
Like I don't know why didn't tell me? And I
get this random call and I started calling all my
friends and being like, what's what is going on? Like
we we don't know what you're talking about, but we
think you should do it. And I kind of went
back and forth in my mom. I was living at
(15:33):
home at the time, so like right after college, and
she was just like, just do it, Like there's so
many girls go to that one like audition, like who knows.
So it's crazy that I ended up where I was
because I I remember they made me do like a
video like where they gave it like a question and
want us to answer it. Like they still make fun
(15:55):
of my video because I like set my phone up
and there's like this big streak of like light on
my face as an in front of a window, and
I just took the questions and just read off the
sheet like most people like make these really cool videos.
I just didn't know what I was doing. And yeah,
and then obviously to see myself like become the Bachelorette
(16:16):
and just see like the fandom. Like you said, it's
like such a big like community of people and there's
Bachelor Nation. That's so bag. I was not prepared for
at all. I had done like pageants and was fine performing,
but this was different, like this is like people in
your like intimate moments kind of with you. Yeah, and
(16:37):
I was not prepared for that, just like a blanket statement,
like was not prepared. I think people really liked me
and you know, following my story and you know, I
became the Bachelorette because I don't know how to pretend
to like be okay with it or pretend that I'm
(16:58):
not affected by camera up my nostril. Like I didn't
realize that going in that there's going to be like,
you know, probably five different people and like there's actually
a camera right here while you're talking to a person
right here, and you have to pretend like they're not there.
Like that was really hard for me. So I feel
like people loved that because I wasn't pretending and I
(17:22):
hadn't like came up with this like calculated plan of
realizing that, oh, if I do this, then all these
other dreams that I have could happen. Like I wasn't
thinking that way. I wast thing I was gonna meet.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
My husband, and you think a lot of girls enter
the space that way, Like already with everything calculated, then
I'm gonna portray myself this way so I can get
this out of this.
Speaker 3 (17:43):
I think if you grew up, yeah, I mean I don't.
I don't know how calculated, but I think people who
I wish I would have kind of watched the show before,
like no, like, oh, certain things can come off ways.
There's ways that you can be edited and portray. Yeah,
there's tropes that are on the show, so like making
(18:04):
sure you don't find yourself kind of in that. So
I do think there are The show has been on
for so long, and I do think people probably are aware.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
I just you were not. But that was that was
a beauty of it because you were honest and transparent
and it was it was organic, and I think that's
why people related. It was relatable to them, you know,
And that's why people wanted to hug you and and
and and to be around your energy because it was
this I'm just here and I'm here for the ride,
but I don't I'm me, you know, And that was
(18:36):
that was a beauty of it all. Your first book,
kind of God bless this mess. It was a New
York Times bestseller. It was it did so well, and
it was a vehicle for you to just open up
and and and and navigate everything you were going through,
you know, and and amazing journey and learning experiences. And
people liked it a lot. And now you have a
(18:57):
new book and you transition into fiction romance novel Why
are you a fan of romance novels?
Speaker 3 (19:06):
So I could have never imagined people would want want
to hear about my own personal story and that i'd
be able to like have the opportunity to you know, write,
I guess a memoir. I call it my quarter life memoir,
because you know, there's still a lot of life to live,
but what I'd learned up to that point, but something
(19:28):
that I've always wanted to do. I remember being at
the kitchen table with my mom, probably like high school,
maybe the first year of college, like back home, being like,
you know, on like one of the things I just
want to be able to do in days, I want
to be able to like write a book. But at
that point, I wanted to write a book kind of
based on my grandmother's life and have like some roughly
(19:55):
based on her, but then some like romance kind of
thrown into there, you know, kind of have like a
rough idea that hasn't happened. But it's so crazy that
that initial like this is something I want to do,
I'm kind of scared to do. I don't know if
I can fully do. This has now happened and been
able to go into the space of writing a fiction
novel because I'm a big fan of just fiction romance
(20:18):
in general. That's always been my escape in some way.
I love stories and so to be able to have
this opportunity to write this book was an actual dream
come true. All the other things that have happened in
my life I couldn't have ever dreamt up. So this
is really really special to me.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
I love the premise of this book and the title
Mistakes We Never Made. And I love this idea that
you came up with of two people who almost always
got in the mix in some way right, going through
different stages of their life. It's very relatable, very smart
because it is I mean, I know a lot of
people that just almost it was the right fit, almost
(20:58):
the right timeing things just never quite worked, and you
always wonder what if right, Yeah, and then they get
this chance to meet again at a wedding, and then
I love the twist and all that of where that goes.
What was the process to come up with something like this?
Obviously different than the story you were just saying, So
what led you to this?
Speaker 3 (21:21):
Well? I kind of drew off different feelings and places
I've been in my own life. The premise at first, well,
and it originally started to be a young adult series,
and then that kind of got like that idea got
kind of pushed to the side, and then was like,
that's not really where I'm at my life. So maybe
(21:44):
I just want to like really draw off inspiration and
experiences I've been through, people around me have been through.
And so with this book in particular, I wanted the
main character. And actually there's a group of friends in
the book, and each one of them, I would say,
(22:04):
is a part of me, if that makes sense, Like
Emma is a part of me that wants to have
everything like under control, wants to be able to kind
of more like this part is me kind of walls
but like type A just that's it's kind of how
I navigated life, Like when I was I was younger,
I just wanted to excel and be good and have
(22:27):
more control over things. And we started I start off
with her book, but all the other girls I kind
of have a part of me. So that's how I
like draw inspiration from, Like how would I be in
these certain situations, So kind of that's where I go
with that. Then this this relationship between Emaf and I
(22:51):
feel like there's been a lot of times where in
my life I've I've been in our relationship or been
dating someone that like they're great, but there's just something
that's off with him or me and it just like
doesn't work out. And I thought it'd be really cool to,
like you said, like kind of dive intoto, like what
would that be like if these two people could come
(23:17):
together and see what happens when they're put in this
like very interesting situation.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
Like an extreme they have.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
To find the best their mutual best friend who is
the runaway bride, and they are kind of not on
the best speaking terms at the point from all the
different times in their past that just things haven't worked out,
and now they have to go on a wild goose
chase to try to help their friend not make a
(23:48):
horrible decision. And it's fun to be able to see,
like how are they going to navigate that uncomfortable conversation
of like where they're at now? Will they be able
to actually have the courage, I feel like to take
the risk of actually saying how you feel, whether that's
you feel hurt and this person has you know, made
(24:10):
you feel portrayed or has made you start questioning things
about yourself, Like having that conversation and confronting somebody about
that that you actually care about can be really tough.
So you know, we get to see if Emma and Finn,
the main characters, well to take the risk to kind
of confront each other and actually say how they feel
(24:30):
and actually take the chance, if given the right opportunity,
to like make this thing work.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
Do you see it as a series?
Speaker 3 (24:39):
I do so. It's actually already a two book series
at at this moment.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
Oh it is? Okay? Is it out? I apologize? Is
it out already or not yet? When is it coming out?
Speaker 3 (24:54):
This the first book comes out May seventh, okay, and
then I'm already working on the second book. But kind
of how I said, like the girls are are different
parts to me, and I'll can you know, continue the
series with the second book kind of going into one
of the other characters that I hope that you get
(25:14):
really invested in in this book and want to know
more what happened.
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Do you have people approaching you to make it into
a movie.
Speaker 4 (25:22):
Or a series? It could be a very fun run.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Yeah, because I'm assuming because because you're a big name
in the country in America, that's the.
Speaker 3 (25:29):
Goal, and that was that was the thought behind writing
the book. Just in general, like a lot of times,
you know, they're we've took a lot of time, and
I had a great team with me to really think
about how would this visually, how could this translate? How
(25:49):
what type of high stakes the speed of which the
book goes like, how can we translate that, hopefully for
a bigger screen.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Have you heard of? Have you heard of? And I
don't mean to do a plug to to this streamer?
Have you have you heard of Passion Flicks? No, So,
Passion Flicks is Tosca Mosque. Elon Musk's his sister. She's
a director, producer and she's been added for a long
time and she opened her own streamer called Passion Flicks.
(26:24):
And all they do is romance novels. The entire every
single movie it's about. She basically acquires IP like like
that exists, but it's all Roman romance novels. And the
female demo, I guess, is humongous. And I'm telling you
this because it's so interesting. I just I just did
(26:44):
a movie for her called Wallbanger, that is a series
of three and they have a big screening in Puerto
Rico in a couple of weeks because they do the
Passion Flicks convention and women from all over the world
travel to whatever the convention is. I had no idea
about this world and no idea about Passion Flicks, and
I just go called the good offer to do this
movie and it was very cute, and I thought it
(27:05):
was such a smart thing. I'm going to have a
streaming app that is just for basically for women about
romance novels. And the movies are really well done. I'm
very cute.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
But would you define your book more as a romance
novel or rom com?
Speaker 3 (27:18):
I would love to see it more as a traditional
rom com because that's what I love the most. But
I think, yeah, I would definitely say it's more of
a rom comed It's like, it's fun. I want people
to be like laughing along and feel like this is
just something they can gobble up while they're on like
(27:39):
their summer.
Speaker 4 (27:40):
I think you're gonna have options based on this premise.
I think you're gonna have options. I really hope that
you get to take this to the big screen. That'd
be really fun. Yeah, and good luck with your second book.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
Thank you. Yeah, I mean I would love to. You know,
I have been on TV before and off obviously seeing
that side of the other side of production, and I
would love to be able to dabble on that and
be really cool to be able to do that with
my own content. So that's the goal. But I know
(28:10):
that that's the goal for a lot of people. But
you know, in the I'm really just excited for people
to like get to fall in love with this world
and get lost in the story. And I think it'll be,
like I said, like a really great summer read that
I'm I'm just super proud of it and really humped
for people who like love this genre to be I
(28:33):
hope like surprised by just how much they love it.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
They will, they will love it.
Speaker 4 (28:38):
We're rooting for you.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
I hope the book does amazing. May seventh is when
it's out again. Mistakes we never made awesome.
Speaker 1 (28:46):
Thank you so much, China, You're lovely.
Speaker 3 (28:48):
Thank you. I really appreciate you're having me on.
Speaker 4 (28:51):
Thank you. Nice meeting. Bye, this was great. This is
going to be such a cool book. I think you
love this read.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
I know this.
Speaker 4 (29:03):
She's jamming.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
I love that she's done so much since The Bachelor
and The Bachelorette, both obviously other fun you know, reality shows,
but now diving in for a second book.
Speaker 4 (29:15):
In the writing world, this is this is great.
Speaker 1 (29:17):
Yeah, she's a She's a success story for sure.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
One hundred percent. Well, I'm so glad we had her
on hand. Brown, thank you and uh until next time.
Speaker 3 (29:26):
I love you.
Speaker 4 (29:27):
Thanks for listening. Don't forget to write us a review
and tell us what you think.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
If you want to follow us on Instagram, che goes
out at, he said. Ajason is an email Eric and
Ross at iHeartRadio dot com, he said, is part of
iHeartRadio's Mike wild Up podcast network.
Speaker 4 (29:43):
See you next time.
Speaker 3 (29:43):
I
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