October 16, 2023 • 34 mins
Anyone that claims you can’t be a mom AND run a successful business hasn’t met Kristin Gallant and Deena Margolin!
Paris sits down with the founders of Big Little Feelings to hear the story of how they went from best friends to business partners when they started their own company.
Plus, find out why sometimes the best advice is to do the OPPOSITE of what people say.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Wow, I embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hi everyone, Welcome to a very special episode of I
Am Paris. Today. We're going to mix things up a
little bit with these episodes and focus on motherhood and
families with the help of our special guests. With over
three point two million followers on Instagram, Big Little Feelings
is a genuine phenomenon. They specialize in helping parents not
only survive the toddler years, but thrive. Big Little Feelings
(00:32):
has quickly become the largest online parenting resource and community,
and they're winning the Toddler Stage and Potty Training Made
Simple are the world's best selling online toddler courses, having
helped transform over three hundred thousand families and counting. Kristin
and Dina also recently launched their own podcast, after Bedtime
(00:52):
with Big Little Feelings, and it instantly became the number
one podcast on Apple Podcasts. Today, I'm sitting down with
the two powerhouse moms behind Big Little Feelings, Kristin and Dina.
Hi girls, hi Hei, Welcome to Slivington mana.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
God, Thank you for having us.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
It was so nice to be here.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
For having us.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Thank you for having a dog in the room too.
I was just hoping we'd have one.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
Your dream came true.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
I literally said it on the way over.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
I'm obsessed with these dogs and yes, everything to me. Yeah,
so do you guys have pets?
Speaker 1 (01:25):
We do.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
I have two dogs. Dina has her dog, and like.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
My dog was my first baby, literally her baby. Yeah,
like I would sing to him every night before bed.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
I remember that, Dina, I think I had my first baby.
We've been best friends for I mean twenty years, not
to age us. And when Dina I had my first baby,
she was six months old. I had no idea what
I was doing because I was like the first one
of our friends to have babies. But I visited her
and she had her baby, which was this pug, And
the way she took care of this pug is probably
(01:58):
similar to how you take care of your pets. It
was like this Vlure blanket and had this like perfect
little bed. Would give him his pacifier and like seeing
him a little nine night song.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
They are like our babies. You think it like trains
us for motherhood in a way. Yeah, obviously a real
child is a lot more responsibility, but.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
Yeah, a lot of work's good practice.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
Yeah, how did your girls meet?
Speaker 1 (02:25):
We met in high school? Actually we met playing softball
together on the varsity team.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Yeah, we went to high school together.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
We were whole of her opposites is a good way
to describe it. Like I was the bad kid with
undiagnosed ADHD at the time, but who didn't who knew? Right,
So I was a bad girl. And I would walk
out of detention in the morning with my sunglasses on,
and Dina would be walking into school and we would
like high five each other on the road.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Did all the homework, like pick me. I did the homework.
I know the answer.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
And we still loved each other. Anyways, You're great for
where you are.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Yeah, we both had the same kind of weird.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Yeah, and no one knew about ADHD then or was
talking about it.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
And I think I mean stigmas. Back then, there was
no at least for us in our family. There was
no therapy. There was no you know, it was just
what's wrong with you is kind of the vibe. And
I don't know that that's anyone's fault. I just think
things were not that way back then. It was very
you know, sit, don't pay attention what's wrong with you?
(03:30):
And change yourself? You know.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
Yeah, I can relate to that in so many ways. Yeah,
nobody was talking about add ADHD. There was. It was
just not a thing at all. So I was just assume, like, oh,
she just is failing classes. She can't pay attention, she's
getting back grade, She's not like excelling in anything except
for like art class.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
Yeah, daydreaming, you're talking too much, and it's like, well
we can't, we can't sit here, And like now I know,
you know, like this is an asset. Like everything that
I used to be punished for is now something that
really helps me in being a creative entrepreneur, dreamer, you know.
And there are still things that I struggle with that,
(04:12):
thank god, my co founder is fantastic at you know,
but every single thing that I'm great at now has
really led to where like we are as a combination,
and it just it makes me so sad for us
and everyone. I think this was so common for all
of us, and it still lives within me a lot
of the times of being like what is wrong with me?
(04:33):
Like why can't I do things a certain way?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Yeah? I feel lucky with me. I have my husband
who's like exact opposities just like so just like organized
and responsible, which is amazing because I need someone like
that around me. Yeah, so it's perfect when you can
have like update.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Is my house teem like that balance it out.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Yes, but yeah, I think it's I think it's really
great for people to talk about now because I'm sure
there's a lot of kids who are confused as well.
And I think that if you can harness it in
the right way, it could be like a superpower.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
Which well, and I think I wish i'd go back then,
like when adults can harness it in too with you
and support you in the right way. I can't imagine
what that would have changed for us. Like you said,
it's like as a kid, your responsibility to like harness
it in yourself and keep it going. That's hard, you know.
Like it's more also like fostering kids exactly where they
(05:26):
are and knowing that that's an asset as well. You
know they may struggle in this one way, but really
encouraging that wild creativity or whatever else they may have.
It's an asset.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Yeah. So going from friends to business partners is a
huge jump. How did you decide to go into business together?
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Well, it was back in twenty twenty and we so
I'm a child therapist. Kristen was a mom first, and
it was a few things really, Like first, she was
texting me all the time being like okay, like she
won't go to bed. What can I do? Like it's
time to get rid of the pacifier? How do I
do this without traumatizing her? So we would just go
(06:04):
back and forth all the time, and we realized that
there's so much stuff out there for the baby stage, right,
and then when you hit toddlerhood, it's like, okay, best
of luck. There was nothing out there or everything that
was out there was just so clinical complex. We imagine
this this resource, this community for busy tired parents where
(06:30):
they could just have these tipsies, tricks for ages one
through six, like real things that really work in the moment.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
As part of it, Yeah, bite size and you can
understand it and it's applicable to like what's actually happening
in front of you instead of these like really vague
ideas of like don't miss your kid up like you
beys know, it's like wait, but okay, I don't want
to mess them up. And how you know when you
need to leave the park, I say, you know, like,
how do we actually do real stuff. So the business
(06:57):
came from like just a true inherent since I was
a mom at the time and I'm like, this is
just there's there's nothing like I'm reading all the books,
I'm looking at everything, and I think that's where the
genesis of like all of our things that were great
at is when we're like I'm desperate to see this
or I'm desperate to hear this, and I guess we
(07:18):
were onto something.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
We were right, Yeah, community, and it grew faster than
we thought it would.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
Yeah. And the other side of it too was it
was half of like the struggles of toddlerhood and nothing
being specific, but also on Instagram this is in general
in life, but especially in motherhood. At the time, everything
was really really really high pressure. I had postpartum anxiety,
and I remember I didn't have friends right that had kids.
(07:46):
I was the first one. So watching sort of motherhood
on social media was how I was understanding what motherhood
should be like. And it was a lot of like
perfect little activities that take hours to set up and
you know, cut of little cucumbers into little shapes and
all of this like perfection, which there's nothing wrong with
doing it. I cut you know, little shapes sometimes too,
(08:07):
But at the time everything was just really high stakes perfection,
like the perfect playroom, the perfect everything. So the other
half of what we really wanted to do was just
kind of come in as this this vulnerable, real, raw
kind of depiction of what motherhood parenthood could actually be. Like,
you know, it can be perfect, it can be hard,
(08:28):
it can be messy. There's nothing wrong with being messy.
You're life doesn't have to be perfect. And I think
that was also the catalyst to like our business really growing.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Yeah, so we kind of took a risk in that too, Yeah,
by being like, you know what, We're going to show
up as our true selves and see how it goes. Yeah,
I love it.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
I think it's so needed because it is so true.
Like everything out there is either so complex to read
this whole long book or like speak to a doctor
and they say all these words, it doesn't make sense.
So I think it's amazing to have it simplified and
real and just showing like how it really is. Because
(09:08):
also on Instagram, everyone wants to show the perfect Instagram life,
and you know a lot of it has like a
set director and like a whole team behind it putting
it all together, and you know, not every mom is
going to do that obviously.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Yeah, yeah, well that's just not what it looks like,
you know, like even you, I'm imagining that has you know,
this is your career and your job, but I am
imagining that what it looks like when you're with your
little baby, Like it gets real, you know at times
it's not a glossy magazine every day, Like it's beautiful.
It's beautiful how real it really is? You know, and
(09:41):
we're just not we weren't seeing enough of that, Like
it's not even real in a bad way. It's like
real can be really beautiful moments.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
I'm a child therapist and i'm you know, I'm making
mistakes and not always getting it right and learning, and yeah,
printing's a journey.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
It's the best journey.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Yeah it is.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
I love the name Big Little Feelings. How did you
come up with it?
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Funny story, So at the beginning, Kristen and I wrote
down a list of probably like ten different names, and
then hold everyone we knew and literally no one picked
Big Little Feelings except this. And then we came back
and we were like, okay, we got five votes for that,
ten for that, we looked at each other and we're like,
let's go with big little feelings. Yeah that feels right.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, which is like really our journey of this whatever
you want to call it, business, entrepreneurship, whatever you want.
Where at the very beginning we consulted social media agencies
like should we hire different people? And every time we
got advice, we were like.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
That, so we did it our way.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Yeah, yeah, I think it's always good when you go
with your own intuition, your own feelings. Yeah, yeah, could
be a big er little feeling and right, I love it.
So what sets you apart from other content creators?
Speaker 1 (11:03):
Ooh, I would say probably showing up as just like
our true true selves and we're a little out there sometimes,
but yeah, I think everything, Like, especially when it comes
to parenting, a lot of the pages, we're giving tips
in a way that you watch it and you're like, well,
(11:24):
I didn't say that, and I didn't do that, like
I must have messed up, and I, you know, did
I mess my kid up? I didn't do it that way.
And I think that was a really big thing that
kind of set us apart is trying to make every
parent feel empowered and remember that you don't have to
get it right every time, and nothing is perfect and
(11:44):
we are all doing a great job.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Yeah, And I think it's like half that and then
the other half what we already talked about where whether
it's books or parenting advice in general, we just thought
everything that was there you almost need like a college
degree and to sit like, again, I can't even read
these books like I'm too distracted. I can't sit down
and read this really long, almost clinical book. And that's
(12:08):
the most popular parenting pages or anything that is out there.
And I think we wanted, we were really really clear
that we really wanted to be for every family, like
you do not need a college degree, you do not
need to be any certain kind. Your family can look
a hundred different ways, and this is a space for you.
Like we wanted everyone to feel welcome at our page.
And that's really like our driving force every day is
(12:31):
how accessible can we make ourselves and our advice and
is it going to touch at like can anyone understand
it and implement it no matter how busy they are,
no matter how many shifts they're working, no matter what
their family looks like, like, can they do it? Really
simply that's I think what sets us apart.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
So, Phoenix just turn eight months old. I was wondering
if you guys had an advice for me because he's about
to enter toddlerhood.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Well, first of all, I feel like a lot of
people kind of lean on the negative of toddlerhood of like,
oh no, the terrible twos and wait till they start
walking and you just wait until they start talking, as
if it's like so horrible. But really, I'm excited for
you because these years are wonderful. It comes with a
lot because it comes with a lot of like brain development,
(13:24):
and they're still developing like really critical areas of their
brain that help them manage their emotions and their bodies.
So you're gonna see a lot of big feelings and
they're going to be exploring how the world works and
putting things in their mouths and trying to eat everything,
like yesush back, pushback, all of that, yep, And it's
it's just part of development, and it's like a magical stage.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
My god, the things that are gonna come out of
his mouth, You're just gonna like melt on the floor
because you have nieces and nephews. I think right, so
you know what it's like, It's like it's so fun.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
When he says mama, Oh my god, I can't live die.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Yeah yeah, he says like yeah, yeah, of course a
boy that's also far no mama yet.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
See are you guys like like like my husband and
I would be like, mama, mama, mama, like all the races.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Yeah, it was a data both times for me, Like
they can say data easier.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
Yeah that's why.
Speaker 3 (14:25):
Yeah, my husband had.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
Nothing to do with us. Yeah, I'm not offended.
Speaker 3 (14:29):
Yeah, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Development Yeah, do you notice the boys develop slower than girls?
Speaker 1 (14:38):
Like I would say that varies by child too, like.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
Walking, okay, because everyone always is saying that they're like,
oh yeah, my daughter started walking like eight months. I
was like what, yeah, my baby's like not crawling up. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Yeah, that is they are each on their own timeline,
and every timeline is perfect for each kid.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
And even if I mean, I've had a child that
was behind developmentally and like early intervention is wonderful. Let's
just say that. Also, like if you're comparing me, so
hard to compare milestones like the same thing where my
baby's crawling and others were walking and I'm like, what
is And I was so terrified and at a certain point,
like if we need early intervention, great, if we don't,
(15:19):
if we need speech therapy great, And that was something
I had no idea about going into motherhood, and I
would just panic and I compare babies to babies and
it's like, if I could go back, that's the one
thing I wish I knew where It's like they all
develop in their own timeline and also a lot of
them do need some help sometimes, and like that's actually
not the worst thing in the world. It's completely okay.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
Yeah, it's especially so much more zero to three. To
be dorky for a second, but that is a magical
period for brain developments. When you get early intervention it
it can be a game changer too.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
What's the one topic that you get the most DMS about.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
I would say there's a handful of like big topics
that come up a lot. So one would be hitting,
one would be we're having a new baby join the
family soon, like what do we do to prep and
prevent sibling rivalry? And then another big one is tantrums,
power struggles, pushback.
Speaker 3 (16:16):
Yeah, discipline very confusing, but I think the most common
thing we actually get, like those are the physical, you know,
like like the long stories of the new baby or whatever.
But I think the most common theme that we see
in the DMS, which is kind of crazy to see
because we see three million parents in our dance, which
(16:37):
is just an extraordinary experience and of itself, is this
like underlying at the end question of so did I
mess them up? Like did I ruin them forever? Am
I the worst mom, dad, parent in the whole world?
Like we polled our audience and it was like, what's
the number one thing you're worried about? And we totally
thought it was going to be like, I don't know,
my kids out of control and on the floor all
(16:59):
the time, they're hitting their sister all the time. And
it was ninety nine percent like I'm so afraid I'm
not doing enough and I'm like ruining them forever.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
Yep.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
And that was just the most startling realization. And like
I think every day we just hope that we can
instill some sense of like you're not you're not And
I don't.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Know how it's well, just speaks to this modern parenting
era that we're in, where it's just so much pressure
to be perfect in some ways, you know, with social
media at our fingertips us doing a lot of parenting
alone with very little support. Yeah, it's hard.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Yeah, yeah, what do you enjoy most about the online
community that you felt?
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Honestly like, in my hard times, it helps me remember
that I'm not alone, because sometimes when you're struggling with something,
it can feel like even I feel like like I'm
a garbage parent sometimes after a hard day, and sometimes
I read DMS and I'm like, okay, no, no, no, no,
like shame, get out of here. We're all in this together,
(18:04):
like everyone is going through the same struggles, even though
it's hard to remember that sometimes. And again, like this
whole perfect thing just needs to disappear because there is
no such thing, you know.
Speaker 3 (18:15):
Yeah, I think And my favorite part, I mean I
think that's my favorite part too. Yeah, and my favorite
part is is and this is this is crazy. I mean,
it's mind blowing. But just the thought of maybe three
million or just a million, I don't know how many
kids who will be raised in homes that don't need
(18:36):
to be perfect, by the way, but kind of what
we were speaking to earlier of like if you have
a child that might think a little differently or be
a little different or has big feelings or no matter
who your child is, Like everything on our page or
that's out there right now is really focused on like
the whole child and knowing that they're perfect the way
(18:57):
they are, and loving your child when they're happy, they're mad,
they're sad, and not you know the way I was raised,
which is like your too much, like stop being bad.
It gives me chills and just keeps me going every
day to think that, like, maybe one kid is going
to be seen in such a different way than I
think our parents' generation, to no fault of their own,
(19:19):
by the way, just how they kind of viewed kids
as being like bad or defiant if they were different.
So I just the coolest part about having such a
community is like, maybe we're going to change the narrative
for like one kid.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Yeah there, no, I agree.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
It's really powerful to be able to use your voice
for the good of the world and helping others and yeah,
that's the most empowering feeling in the world.
Speaker 1 (19:43):
Yeah, yeah, it's a dream job.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
H What have been some of the highlights of this
incredible journey since you launched Big Little feelings and.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
The thing, my god, I mean there's been so many.
Speaker 3 (19:56):
It was the first thing that popped into your head, though,
I'm so curious my.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Very first saying that popped in I don't know. It
was like doing really fun things with my best friend,
like like going to New York with you and going
on like morning shows, a.
Speaker 3 (20:13):
Fun Yes, it was being so fun was the first
thing that came.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Yeah, we had a lot of relief.
Speaker 3 (20:20):
Have you been on watch I'm sure you've been right.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
A bunch of times. He's so fun.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
It's so fun.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
Because you never are so nice. Yeah, and you're like, oh,
this is exactly what you would think it. Yeah, actually
that fun. Yeah, just like surreal moments that I think
we never thought we would be able to do.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Yeah. Also, I remember I remember being in my parents'
backyard when we hit ten thousand people, ten thousand followers.
I always hate saying followers because that sounds weird, but like, truly,
it's like ten thousand of our best friends and we
like made a cake and we were just so stoked
and excited and like had no idea that was the
(20:59):
big of the journey.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
Yeah, it's so cool to be able to do it
with your best friend.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Yes, I wouldn't want it any other way.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
So cute, like looking at you guys like you smile
at each other reminds me of like Nicole, and I.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Compliment that is.
Speaker 3 (21:15):
The biggest compliment. Obviously, I'm cool, Dina used to look
exactly like you when we were in high school. I mean,
I don't know if that's a strange thing to say
on this podcast, but people are like, did you guys
know Dina looks exactly like Paris Hilton when she looks
a certain way, and that's hot. Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
Sixteen year old me is about to die.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
Yea, the biggest compliment, thank you.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
No, But it's so true, like being able to do
everything with your best friend and you can't, like, like
it's something that's like that chemistry that you have because
you've known each other in that history. It's like something
you can't like manufacture, just like when they try to
like cast people together on like a show or a
podcast or or whatever, it's like not the same thing
(22:01):
as like having that history and and that like real
true best friend chemistry. So it's cool to see. That's
very rare to see.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
The simple life. So I mean again. I'm just like,
I can't believe that was that out loud.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Here like the iconic best friend, true love, the iconic mom.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
Again.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
Yeah we can die happy now.
Speaker 3 (22:23):
Yes, I think you and Nicole are probably like the
iconic now that you're like both moms. Now, you guys
are again like the mom icons.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
It's so crazy, like Nichole's are like teenagers now. It's
like I was overheard her house a couple of weeks
ago and the kids are just so big, and it's
just like watch, it's like looking up back at us
when we were little again, just so many memories. Oh yeah,
(22:55):
this is a question that I really want to know
because this is something that I feel a lot. How
do you handle mom guilt when you're balancing work with
being a mom?
Speaker 1 (23:04):
So funny, that's when I feel a lot.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
So funny, that was my question for question getting ready
in the shower and I'm like, okay, if I can
have one shot task Paaris something like a side I
would ask her like how do you do this as
a mom and not feel How do you juggle it all?
How do you not feel the guilt? I mean, do
(23:28):
you want us to answer first or do you actually
have an answer.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Yes, it's gonna go for me.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
It's I feel so guilty because I have to do
so many things. I turned so many things down. But
then there's certain you know projects or you know, the
deals that I have to do because they're part of
like very long partnerships and it's things I love to
do as well, like I love performing at Tomorrowland or
things like that. So I I'm very picky about what
(23:57):
I do now. And then I try to FaceTime as
much as possible, and just when I'm here, I try
to be with him as much as possible, like I
put him in the like caring thing and walk around
and to my meetings and from doing stuff at the house.
Like I just try to keep him around as much
as possible. But then when I'm traveling, it's just so hard.
(24:18):
So I'm just trying to like use technology as much
as possible to like have him feel like I'm there,
like looking on the iPad like talking to him and yeah,
but then he's like grabbing out to it and like
trying to hold it. Then I'm just like, oh, I
want to hug you. So it's really hard because you know,
I I feel like I can do it all, and
(24:38):
I feel like being a mom is the hardest job
of all and like moms especially who are like stay
at home moms who would do everything like they're like superheroes.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
It's just it's a lot.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
And I'm still trying to, you know, work it all
out and figure out what to do. But it's like
I feel like that gill is just something that always
stays with you because kids so much.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
Yeah, the guilt means that you care. It means that
you love them. You know, you wouldn't feel guilty otherwise.
And I feel it a lot too. I try to
focus too on like when I am with them, I
try to make it the most present focus, like be
all the way in in the times we are together.
But I also use a lot of like calling them
(25:22):
and FaceTime And yeah, yeah, I.
Speaker 3 (25:24):
Think that's what we were talking about the other day too,
especially as like entrepreneur women who you know, we can
choose what we do, like you were saying, and we
were looking at each other and were like, maybe we
took on too much. Maybe we just like people pleased
and said yes to too many projects. But it's kind
of what you said where it's like that's actually not
the problem. It's like I love this, like I love
(25:47):
doing this, I love playing it Tomorrowland, And I don't know.
I'm seven years in, but I'm not an expert. I
don't know if the guilt is ever going to go away.
I was a stay at home mom for four of
the years, and I've been a working mom for four
of the years and everywhere in between, you know, starting
a business and having nothing and now we travel all
the time. And I'm gonna just tell you I felt guilty.
I felt guilty the whole seven years. I wish I
(26:10):
had a solution. I wish so we didn't feel guilt.
I think it's just like a primal biological thing that
happens that no matter how many projects you do take
or don't take, you may feel because we love them
so much, like you're away from them for five minutes,
and you're gonna feel that pang of like, oh God.
But I really truly, wholeheartedly believe. And I know this
(26:35):
because we've shared in the on like our stories sometimes
and I can't tell you how many dms we get
back of women especially who had mothers who like chased
their dreams and every and you know, people are brutal
on the internet, so like, you know, if if it
were the opposite, would they be sliding and be like, yeah,
my mom was ohhah blah. Overwhelmingly, every single DM was
(27:00):
like I watched my mother like light up and pursue
her passion, and it was the best thing for me
to see. And she was the best mom in the world.
Like when she was with us, we played games, when
she was pursuing her passion, I would like follow her.
I would see her doing it, and it's the best thing.
And I just like hold that close to my heart
because that has to be true. We can have both
(27:21):
and we can also feel guilt and that's okay.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Okay, that's good advice. A lot of people need to
hear that. Up.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
Yeah, it's hard. It's hard.
Speaker 2 (27:30):
Women could do everything.
Speaker 3 (27:32):
We just might feel guilty while we do it. That's okay.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
Yeah, Well I guess if you didn't feel guilty, that
would be weird. So yeah, it's a good thing. Yeah, okay,
yeah you mad if you didn't feel guilty.
Speaker 3 (27:45):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
Tell me about your new podcast after Bedtime.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Oh, it's been so much fun. Honestly, I'm having so
much fun doing it with you, Yeah, that's weird. No,
but this was another thing that it just came straight
from our hearts as two tired, busy moms who wanted
(28:10):
to hear something like this where two best friends show up.
It is raw, it is real. We are making so
many jokes, yeah, but we're also covering topics that a
lot of us are experiencing but no one's really talking about,
which can make you feel really lonely and really looped up,
honestly and alone. And so we wanted to kind of normalize, unpack,
(28:34):
get into a lot of the things like miscarriage, like
how your marriage changes after you have kids, apologizing to
your kids after you've like lost it or messed up
or had a hard day.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:46):
No, we just wanted it to feel. There's a lot
of again parenting podcasts. I think they're all great, That's
why they exist. And I don't think we would have
started a podcast if we didn't think there was something
else that we really wanted to hear, like I just
want to end my day or whenever I'm listening to
my podcast, I want to hear I want to be
a best friend with someone like I wanna it is
(29:08):
really lonely sometimes you know, even if you have a
lot of people in your life, I mean, you're not
going out after bedtime all the time, where you're it
just can be really isolating. And I wanted a place
that felt like you're just chit chatting with your best friends.
And that's what we try. We're trying to do. And
(29:28):
like Dina said, it's just when I had my miscourage,
when I had pregnancy loss, I was I just remember
like desperately looking for other stories that were and I
could if I found one, it was amazing. Like I
literally went to different influencers pages and tried to see
if they had a highlight button that said loss or
(29:48):
something like that. And I think that's so applicable to
so much of parenthood and motherhood where it's like there's
not a whole lot of people talking about it, but
we're all oiencing it and we just want to unpack
it and just like get it out and make it
feel yeah, you know like you can you can share
it with people.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Yeah, talking about hard stuff can be so healing.
Speaker 3 (30:11):
Remember you're in it to hearing someone else's story.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
Yeah, you know, yep, so true.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
I'm sorry that you went through that.
Speaker 3 (30:18):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
I can't imagine thank you, but I do think that
it's amazing for you to be brave and talk about
it because I feel that, you know, there's just people
put so much shame behind so many things that shouldn't
be on them, and it's important people to know they're
not alone. Yeah, because there's so many people who deal
with things and nobody talks about it. So when people
(30:42):
do that, it opens up the door for others to
feel safe to be able to do that as well.
Speaker 3 (30:47):
Yeah, And I mean that's that's the literal, whether it
doesn't have to be on a podcast or like the
three million followers. It was just in my own neighborhood
when I shared we had the loss, and then I
shared I was going to do IVF, but I felt
like so much shame almost, And I distinctly remember this
moment because it was my pregnant neighbor down the street
(31:08):
and she had two girls and I had two girls,
and she was pregnant. God, I was so jealous. I
was so jealous, and I told her that I was
gonna start IVF and I was kind of staying to
She's like, oh, I did IVF for this baby, and
she was it was like the exact same experience, like
she did it in January she was gonna have a boy,
and I was like, oh, when I share something, I
might actually learn that all of these other people are
(31:30):
experiencing exactly what I'm experiencing. And so it could be
about anything in parenthood and motherhood, but I just think
it's one area that we're only touching the surface of
finally being able to like share and not put on
this facade of like everything is great, everything is great,
and it just feels so nice that people are now
starting to kind of like once one person shares.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
It's like, oh God, okay, me too, Like I did
that too.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Yeah, so this is gonna be fun. Some of the
members my eleven eleven media team, and they submitted these questions,
so they're gonna ask them to you, let's do it.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Do ghost task?
Speaker 3 (32:08):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Hard, Yes, yes, they do absolutely, and they have to
be potty trained too.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
How does the tooth or you know I lost her tooth?
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Wow, honey, this is like a Santa question.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
There are satellites.
Speaker 3 (32:26):
Yeah, I don't know. How does the tooth fairy?
Speaker 1 (32:29):
It's not me. I'll tell you that, it's definitely not me.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
We don't have an answer. I skip next like a
past Yeah, I a glove real absolutely without a doubt. Yes,
I think you can ride them in LA Yeah. To
be honest, only in Los Angeles, though, I really do
think there's like pony places that will do it. I've
looked to do it.
Speaker 1 (32:49):
Okay, you're not kidding, they're wow, yeah, book me one.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
Well, I can't have dizzil, but I.
Speaker 3 (32:57):
Think that depends on your home. Yeah you can. You're
say my house you can?
Speaker 1 (33:05):
Is this even a question? It's donks guys.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
Oh wow, I was like scared. As an Internet person,
We're gonna get some that are like, how dare.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
Okay, let me qualify it. I'm severely allergic to cats,
so that's where that comes from.
Speaker 3 (33:20):
I'm an official. All animals are wonderful. Okay, that's true,
They're great.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
Happened to the dinosaur?
Speaker 1 (33:26):
Pass, Honey, there was a big meteor that struck the earth,
terrifying for children. Okay, pass it's Prince of say yes yes,
oh real life one.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Yeah, Well that was so much fun. Thank you, girls,
and I can't wait for the next episode, so everyone
stay tuned because that will be out soon. Loves it.
Speaker 3 (33:57):
Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (33:57):
Thank you, this was fun.
Speaker 2 (33:59):
Thanks thanks for listening to I in Paris. Don't forget
to follow us on Instagram at IM Paris Podcast, Email
us at Paris at iHeartRadio dot com. Be hot and
subscribe now loves it.
Wow, I embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hi everyone, Welcome to a very special episode of I
Am Paris. Today. We're going to mix things up a
little bit with these episodes and focus on motherhood and
families with the help of our special guests. With over
three point two million followers on Instagram, Big Little Feelings
is a genuine phenomenon. They specialize in helping parents not
only survive the toddler years, but thrive. Big Little Feelings
(00:32):
has quickly become the largest online parenting resource and community,
and they're winning the Toddler Stage and Potty Training Made
Simple are the world's best selling online toddler courses, having
helped transform over three hundred thousand families and counting. Kristin
and Dina also recently launched their own podcast, after Bedtime
(00:52):
with Big Little Feelings, and it instantly became the number
one podcast on Apple Podcasts. Today, I'm sitting down with
the two powerhouse moms behind Big Little Feelings, Kristin and Dina.
Hi girls, hi Hei, Welcome to Slivington mana.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
God, Thank you for having us.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
It was so nice to be here.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
For having us.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Thank you for having a dog in the room too.
I was just hoping we'd have one.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
Your dream came true.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
I literally said it on the way over.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
I'm obsessed with these dogs and yes, everything to me. Yeah,
so do you guys have pets?
Speaker 1 (01:25):
We do.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
I have two dogs. Dina has her dog, and like.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
My dog was my first baby, literally her baby. Yeah,
like I would sing to him every night before bed.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
I remember that, Dina, I think I had my first baby.
We've been best friends for I mean twenty years, not
to age us. And when Dina I had my first baby,
she was six months old. I had no idea what
I was doing because I was like the first one
of our friends to have babies. But I visited her
and she had her baby, which was this pug, And
the way she took care of this pug is probably
(01:58):
similar to how you take care of your pets. It
was like this Vlure blanket and had this like perfect
little bed. Would give him his pacifier and like seeing
him a little nine night song.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
They are like our babies. You think it like trains
us for motherhood in a way. Yeah, obviously a real
child is a lot more responsibility, but.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
Yeah, a lot of work's good practice.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
Yeah, how did your girls meet?
Speaker 1 (02:25):
We met in high school? Actually we met playing softball
together on the varsity team.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Yeah, we went to high school together.
Speaker 3 (02:33):
We were whole of her opposites is a good way
to describe it. Like I was the bad kid with
undiagnosed ADHD at the time, but who didn't who knew? Right,
So I was a bad girl. And I would walk
out of detention in the morning with my sunglasses on,
and Dina would be walking into school and we would
like high five each other on the road.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Did all the homework, like pick me. I did the homework.
I know the answer.
Speaker 3 (02:58):
And we still loved each other. Anyways, You're great for
where you are.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Yeah, we both had the same kind of weird.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Yeah, and no one knew about ADHD then or was
talking about it.
Speaker 3 (03:08):
And I think I mean stigmas. Back then, there was
no at least for us in our family. There was
no therapy. There was no you know, it was just
what's wrong with you is kind of the vibe. And
I don't know that that's anyone's fault. I just think
things were not that way back then. It was very
you know, sit, don't pay attention what's wrong with you?
(03:30):
And change yourself? You know.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
Yeah, I can relate to that in so many ways. Yeah,
nobody was talking about add ADHD. There was. It was
just not a thing at all. So I was just assume, like, oh,
she just is failing classes. She can't pay attention, she's
getting back grade, She's not like excelling in anything except
for like art class.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
Yeah, daydreaming, you're talking too much, and it's like, well
we can't, we can't sit here, And like now I know,
you know, like this is an asset. Like everything that
I used to be punished for is now something that
really helps me in being a creative entrepreneur, dreamer, you know.
And there are still things that I struggle with that,
(04:12):
thank god, my co founder is fantastic at you know,
but every single thing that I'm great at now has
really led to where like we are as a combination,
and it just it makes me so sad for us
and everyone. I think this was so common for all
of us, and it still lives within me a lot
of the times of being like what is wrong with me?
(04:33):
Like why can't I do things a certain way?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Yeah? I feel lucky with me. I have my husband
who's like exact opposities just like so just like organized
and responsible, which is amazing because I need someone like
that around me. Yeah, so it's perfect when you can
have like update.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
Is my house teem like that balance it out.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Yes, but yeah, I think it's I think it's really
great for people to talk about now because I'm sure
there's a lot of kids who are confused as well.
And I think that if you can harness it in
the right way, it could be like a superpower.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
Which well, and I think I wish i'd go back then,
like when adults can harness it in too with you
and support you in the right way. I can't imagine
what that would have changed for us. Like you said,
it's like as a kid, your responsibility to like harness
it in yourself and keep it going. That's hard, you know.
Like it's more also like fostering kids exactly where they
(05:26):
are and knowing that that's an asset as well. You
know they may struggle in this one way, but really
encouraging that wild creativity or whatever else they may have.
It's an asset.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Yeah. So going from friends to business partners is a
huge jump. How did you decide to go into business together?
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Well, it was back in twenty twenty and we so
I'm a child therapist. Kristen was a mom first, and
it was a few things really, Like first, she was
texting me all the time being like okay, like she
won't go to bed. What can I do? Like it's
time to get rid of the pacifier? How do I
do this without traumatizing her? So we would just go
(06:04):
back and forth all the time, and we realized that
there's so much stuff out there for the baby stage, right,
and then when you hit toddlerhood, it's like, okay, best
of luck. There was nothing out there or everything that
was out there was just so clinical complex. We imagine
this this resource, this community for busy tired parents where
(06:30):
they could just have these tipsies, tricks for ages one
through six, like real things that really work in the moment.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
As part of it, Yeah, bite size and you can
understand it and it's applicable to like what's actually happening
in front of you instead of these like really vague
ideas of like don't miss your kid up like you
beys know, it's like wait, but okay, I don't want
to mess them up. And how you know when you
need to leave the park, I say, you know, like,
how do we actually do real stuff. So the business
(06:57):
came from like just a true inherent since I was
a mom at the time and I'm like, this is
just there's there's nothing like I'm reading all the books,
I'm looking at everything, and I think that's where the
genesis of like all of our things that were great
at is when we're like I'm desperate to see this
or I'm desperate to hear this, and I guess we
(07:18):
were onto something.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
We were right, Yeah, community, and it grew faster than
we thought it would.
Speaker 3 (07:24):
Yeah. And the other side of it too was it
was half of like the struggles of toddlerhood and nothing
being specific, but also on Instagram this is in general
in life, but especially in motherhood. At the time, everything
was really really really high pressure. I had postpartum anxiety,
and I remember I didn't have friends right that had kids.
(07:46):
I was the first one. So watching sort of motherhood
on social media was how I was understanding what motherhood
should be like. And it was a lot of like
perfect little activities that take hours to set up and
you know, cut of little cucumbers into little shapes and
all of this like perfection, which there's nothing wrong with
doing it. I cut you know, little shapes sometimes too,
(08:07):
But at the time everything was just really high stakes perfection,
like the perfect playroom, the perfect everything. So the other
half of what we really wanted to do was just
kind of come in as this this vulnerable, real, raw
kind of depiction of what motherhood parenthood could actually be. Like,
you know, it can be perfect, it can be hard,
(08:28):
it can be messy. There's nothing wrong with being messy.
You're life doesn't have to be perfect. And I think
that was also the catalyst to like our business really growing.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Yeah, so we kind of took a risk in that too, Yeah,
by being like, you know what, We're going to show
up as our true selves and see how it goes. Yeah,
I love it.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
I think it's so needed because it is so true.
Like everything out there is either so complex to read
this whole long book or like speak to a doctor
and they say all these words, it doesn't make sense.
So I think it's amazing to have it simplified and
real and just showing like how it really is. Because
(09:08):
also on Instagram, everyone wants to show the perfect Instagram life,
and you know a lot of it has like a
set director and like a whole team behind it putting
it all together, and you know, not every mom is
going to do that obviously.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Yeah, yeah, well that's just not what it looks like,
you know, like even you, I'm imagining that has you know,
this is your career and your job, but I am
imagining that what it looks like when you're with your
little baby, Like it gets real, you know at times
it's not a glossy magazine every day, Like it's beautiful.
It's beautiful how real it really is? You know, and
(09:41):
we're just not we weren't seeing enough of that, Like
it's not even real in a bad way. It's like
real can be really beautiful moments.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
I'm a child therapist and i'm you know, I'm making
mistakes and not always getting it right and learning, and yeah,
printing's a journey.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
It's the best journey.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Yeah it is.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
I love the name Big Little Feelings. How did you
come up with it?
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Funny story, So at the beginning, Kristen and I wrote
down a list of probably like ten different names, and
then hold everyone we knew and literally no one picked
Big Little Feelings except this. And then we came back
and we were like, okay, we got five votes for that,
ten for that, we looked at each other and we're like,
let's go with big little feelings. Yeah that feels right.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, which is like really our journey of this whatever
you want to call it, business, entrepreneurship, whatever you want.
Where at the very beginning we consulted social media agencies
like should we hire different people? And every time we
got advice, we were like.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
That, so we did it our way.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Yeah, yeah, I think it's always good when you go
with your own intuition, your own feelings. Yeah, yeah, could
be a big er little feeling and right, I love it.
So what sets you apart from other content creators?
Speaker 1 (11:03):
Ooh, I would say probably showing up as just like
our true true selves and we're a little out there sometimes,
but yeah, I think everything, Like, especially when it comes
to parenting, a lot of the pages, we're giving tips
in a way that you watch it and you're like, well,
(11:24):
I didn't say that, and I didn't do that, like
I must have messed up, and I, you know, did
I mess my kid up? I didn't do it that way.
And I think that was a really big thing that
kind of set us apart is trying to make every
parent feel empowered and remember that you don't have to
get it right every time, and nothing is perfect and
(11:44):
we are all doing a great job.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Yeah, And I think it's like half that and then
the other half what we already talked about where whether
it's books or parenting advice in general, we just thought
everything that was there you almost need like a college
degree and to sit like, again, I can't even read
these books like I'm too distracted. I can't sit down
and read this really long, almost clinical book. And that's
(12:08):
the most popular parenting pages or anything that is out there.
And I think we wanted, we were really really clear
that we really wanted to be for every family, like
you do not need a college degree, you do not
need to be any certain kind. Your family can look
a hundred different ways, and this is a space for you.
Like we wanted everyone to feel welcome at our page.
And that's really like our driving force every day is
(12:31):
how accessible can we make ourselves and our advice and
is it going to touch at like can anyone understand
it and implement it no matter how busy they are,
no matter how many shifts they're working, no matter what
their family looks like, like, can they do it? Really
simply that's I think what sets us apart.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
So, Phoenix just turn eight months old. I was wondering
if you guys had an advice for me because he's about
to enter toddlerhood.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Well, first of all, I feel like a lot of
people kind of lean on the negative of toddlerhood of like,
oh no, the terrible twos and wait till they start
walking and you just wait until they start talking, as
if it's like so horrible. But really, I'm excited for
you because these years are wonderful. It comes with a
lot because it comes with a lot of like brain development,
(13:24):
and they're still developing like really critical areas of their
brain that help them manage their emotions and their bodies.
So you're gonna see a lot of big feelings and
they're going to be exploring how the world works and
putting things in their mouths and trying to eat everything,
like yesush back, pushback, all of that, yep, And it's
it's just part of development, and it's like a magical stage.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
My god, the things that are gonna come out of
his mouth, You're just gonna like melt on the floor
because you have nieces and nephews. I think right, so
you know what it's like, It's like it's so fun.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
When he says mama, Oh my god, I can't live die.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Yeah yeah, he says like yeah, yeah, of course a
boy that's also far no mama yet.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
See are you guys like like like my husband and
I would be like, mama, mama, mama, like all the races.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Yeah, it was a data both times for me, Like
they can say data easier.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
Yeah that's why.
Speaker 3 (14:25):
Yeah, my husband had.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
Nothing to do with us. Yeah, I'm not offended.
Speaker 3 (14:29):
Yeah, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Development Yeah, do you notice the boys develop slower than girls?
Speaker 1 (14:38):
Like I would say that varies by child too, like.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
Walking, okay, because everyone always is saying that they're like,
oh yeah, my daughter started walking like eight months. I
was like what, yeah, my baby's like not crawling up. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Yeah, that is they are each on their own timeline,
and every timeline is perfect for each kid.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
And even if I mean, I've had a child that
was behind developmentally and like early intervention is wonderful. Let's
just say that. Also, like if you're comparing me, so
hard to compare milestones like the same thing where my
baby's crawling and others were walking and I'm like, what
is And I was so terrified and at a certain point,
like if we need early intervention, great, if we don't,
(15:19):
if we need speech therapy great, And that was something
I had no idea about going into motherhood, and I
would just panic and I compare babies to babies and
it's like, if I could go back, that's the one
thing I wish I knew where It's like they all
develop in their own timeline and also a lot of
them do need some help sometimes, and like that's actually
not the worst thing in the world. It's completely okay.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
Yeah, it's especially so much more zero to three. To
be dorky for a second, but that is a magical
period for brain developments. When you get early intervention it
it can be a game changer too.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
What's the one topic that you get the most DMS about.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
I would say there's a handful of like big topics
that come up a lot. So one would be hitting,
one would be we're having a new baby join the
family soon, like what do we do to prep and
prevent sibling rivalry? And then another big one is tantrums,
power struggles, pushback.
Speaker 3 (16:16):
Yeah, discipline very confusing, but I think the most common
thing we actually get, like those are the physical, you know,
like like the long stories of the new baby or whatever.
But I think the most common theme that we see
in the DMS, which is kind of crazy to see
because we see three million parents in our dance, which
(16:37):
is just an extraordinary experience and of itself, is this
like underlying at the end question of so did I
mess them up? Like did I ruin them forever? Am
I the worst mom, dad, parent in the whole world?
Like we polled our audience and it was like, what's
the number one thing you're worried about? And we totally
thought it was going to be like, I don't know,
my kids out of control and on the floor all
(16:59):
the time, they're hitting their sister all the time. And
it was ninety nine percent like I'm so afraid I'm
not doing enough and I'm like ruining them forever.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
Yep.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
And that was just the most startling realization. And like
I think every day we just hope that we can
instill some sense of like you're not you're not And
I don't.
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Know how it's well, just speaks to this modern parenting
era that we're in, where it's just so much pressure
to be perfect in some ways, you know, with social
media at our fingertips us doing a lot of parenting
alone with very little support. Yeah, it's hard.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Yeah, yeah, what do you enjoy most about the online
community that you felt?
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Honestly like, in my hard times, it helps me remember
that I'm not alone, because sometimes when you're struggling with something,
it can feel like even I feel like like I'm
a garbage parent sometimes after a hard day, and sometimes
I read DMS and I'm like, okay, no, no, no, no,
like shame, get out of here. We're all in this together,
(18:04):
like everyone is going through the same struggles, even though
it's hard to remember that sometimes. And again, like this
whole perfect thing just needs to disappear because there is
no such thing, you know.
Speaker 3 (18:15):
Yeah, I think And my favorite part, I mean I
think that's my favorite part too. Yeah, and my favorite
part is is and this is this is crazy. I mean,
it's mind blowing. But just the thought of maybe three
million or just a million, I don't know how many
kids who will be raised in homes that don't need
(18:36):
to be perfect, by the way, but kind of what
we were speaking to earlier of like if you have
a child that might think a little differently or be
a little different or has big feelings or no matter
who your child is, Like everything on our page or
that's out there right now is really focused on like
the whole child and knowing that they're perfect the way
(18:57):
they are, and loving your child when they're happy, they're mad,
they're sad, and not you know the way I was raised,
which is like your too much, like stop being bad.
It gives me chills and just keeps me going every
day to think that, like, maybe one kid is going
to be seen in such a different way than I
think our parents' generation, to no fault of their own,
(19:19):
by the way, just how they kind of viewed kids
as being like bad or defiant if they were different.
So I just the coolest part about having such a
community is like, maybe we're going to change the narrative
for like one kid.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Yeah there, no, I agree.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
It's really powerful to be able to use your voice
for the good of the world and helping others and yeah,
that's the most empowering feeling in the world.
Speaker 1 (19:43):
Yeah, yeah, it's a dream job.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
H What have been some of the highlights of this
incredible journey since you launched Big Little feelings and.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
The thing, my god, I mean there's been so many.
Speaker 3 (19:56):
It was the first thing that popped into your head, though,
I'm so curious my.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Very first saying that popped in I don't know. It
was like doing really fun things with my best friend,
like like going to New York with you and going
on like morning shows, a.
Speaker 3 (20:13):
Fun Yes, it was being so fun was the first
thing that came.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Yeah, we had a lot of relief.
Speaker 3 (20:20):
Have you been on watch I'm sure you've been right.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
A bunch of times. He's so fun.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
It's so fun.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
Because you never are so nice. Yeah, and you're like, oh,
this is exactly what you would think it. Yeah, actually
that fun. Yeah, just like surreal moments that I think
we never thought we would be able to do.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Yeah. Also, I remember I remember being in my parents'
backyard when we hit ten thousand people, ten thousand followers.
I always hate saying followers because that sounds weird, but like, truly,
it's like ten thousand of our best friends and we
like made a cake and we were just so stoked
and excited and like had no idea that was the
(20:59):
big of the journey.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
Yeah, it's so cool to be able to do it
with your best friend.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Yes, I wouldn't want it any other way.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
So cute, like looking at you guys like you smile
at each other reminds me of like Nicole, and I.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
Compliment that is.
Speaker 3 (21:15):
The biggest compliment. Obviously, I'm cool, Dina used to look
exactly like you when we were in high school. I mean,
I don't know if that's a strange thing to say
on this podcast, but people are like, did you guys
know Dina looks exactly like Paris Hilton when she looks
a certain way, and that's hot. Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
Sixteen year old me is about to die.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
Yea, the biggest compliment, thank you.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
No, But it's so true, like being able to do
everything with your best friend and you can't, like, like
it's something that's like that chemistry that you have because
you've known each other in that history. It's like something
you can't like manufacture, just like when they try to
like cast people together on like a show or a
podcast or or whatever, it's like not the same thing
(22:01):
as like having that history and and that like real
true best friend chemistry. So it's cool to see. That's
very rare to see.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
The simple life. So I mean again. I'm just like,
I can't believe that was that out loud.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Here like the iconic best friend, true love, the iconic mom.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
Again.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
Yeah we can die happy now.
Speaker 3 (22:23):
Yes, I think you and Nicole are probably like the
iconic now that you're like both moms. Now, you guys
are again like the mom icons.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
It's so crazy, like Nichole's are like teenagers now. It's
like I was overheard her house a couple of weeks
ago and the kids are just so big, and it's
just like watch, it's like looking up back at us
when we were little again, just so many memories. Oh yeah,
(22:55):
this is a question that I really want to know
because this is something that I feel a lot. How
do you handle mom guilt when you're balancing work with
being a mom?
Speaker 1 (23:04):
So funny, that's when I feel a lot.
Speaker 3 (23:06):
So funny, that was my question for question getting ready
in the shower and I'm like, okay, if I can
have one shot task Paaris something like a side I
would ask her like how do you do this as
a mom and not feel How do you juggle it all?
How do you not feel the guilt? I mean, do
(23:28):
you want us to answer first or do you actually
have an answer.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Yes, it's gonna go for me.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
It's I feel so guilty because I have to do
so many things. I turned so many things down. But
then there's certain you know projects or you know, the
deals that I have to do because they're part of
like very long partnerships and it's things I love to
do as well, like I love performing at Tomorrowland or
things like that. So I I'm very picky about what
(23:57):
I do now. And then I try to FaceTime as
much as possible, and just when I'm here, I try
to be with him as much as possible, like I
put him in the like caring thing and walk around
and to my meetings and from doing stuff at the house.
Like I just try to keep him around as much
as possible. But then when I'm traveling, it's just so hard.
(24:18):
So I'm just trying to like use technology as much
as possible to like have him feel like I'm there,
like looking on the iPad like talking to him and yeah,
but then he's like grabbing out to it and like
trying to hold it. Then I'm just like, oh, I
want to hug you. So it's really hard because you know,
I I feel like I can do it all, and
(24:38):
I feel like being a mom is the hardest job
of all and like moms especially who are like stay
at home moms who would do everything like they're like superheroes.
Speaker 1 (24:50):
It's just it's a lot.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
And I'm still trying to, you know, work it all
out and figure out what to do. But it's like
I feel like that gill is just something that always
stays with you because kids so much.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
Yeah, the guilt means that you care. It means that
you love them. You know, you wouldn't feel guilty otherwise.
And I feel it a lot too. I try to
focus too on like when I am with them, I
try to make it the most present focus, like be
all the way in in the times we are together.
But I also use a lot of like calling them
(25:22):
and FaceTime And yeah, yeah, I.
Speaker 3 (25:24):
Think that's what we were talking about the other day too,
especially as like entrepreneur women who you know, we can
choose what we do, like you were saying, and we
were looking at each other and were like, maybe we
took on too much. Maybe we just like people pleased
and said yes to too many projects. But it's kind
of what you said where it's like that's actually not
the problem. It's like I love this, like I love
(25:47):
doing this, I love playing it Tomorrowland, And I don't know.
I'm seven years in, but I'm not an expert. I
don't know if the guilt is ever going to go away.
I was a stay at home mom for four of
the years, and I've been a working mom for four
of the years and everywhere in between, you know, starting
a business and having nothing and now we travel all
the time. And I'm gonna just tell you I felt guilty.
I felt guilty the whole seven years. I wish I
(26:10):
had a solution. I wish so we didn't feel guilt.
I think it's just like a primal biological thing that
happens that no matter how many projects you do take
or don't take, you may feel because we love them
so much, like you're away from them for five minutes,
and you're gonna feel that pang of like, oh God.
But I really truly, wholeheartedly believe. And I know this
(26:35):
because we've shared in the on like our stories sometimes
and I can't tell you how many dms we get
back of women especially who had mothers who like chased
their dreams and every and you know, people are brutal
on the internet, so like, you know, if if it
were the opposite, would they be sliding and be like, yeah,
my mom was ohhah blah. Overwhelmingly, every single DM was
(27:00):
like I watched my mother like light up and pursue
her passion, and it was the best thing for me
to see. And she was the best mom in the world.
Like when she was with us, we played games, when
she was pursuing her passion, I would like follow her.
I would see her doing it, and it's the best thing.
And I just like hold that close to my heart
because that has to be true. We can have both
(27:21):
and we can also feel guilt and that's okay.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Okay, that's good advice. A lot of people need to
hear that. Up.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
Yeah, it's hard. It's hard.
Speaker 2 (27:30):
Women could do everything.
Speaker 3 (27:32):
We just might feel guilty while we do it. That's okay.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
Yeah, Well I guess if you didn't feel guilty, that
would be weird. So yeah, it's a good thing. Yeah, okay,
yeah you mad if you didn't feel guilty.
Speaker 3 (27:45):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
Tell me about your new podcast after Bedtime.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Oh, it's been so much fun. Honestly, I'm having so
much fun doing it with you, Yeah, that's weird. No,
but this was another thing that it just came straight
from our hearts as two tired, busy moms who wanted
(28:10):
to hear something like this where two best friends show up.
It is raw, it is real. We are making so
many jokes, yeah, but we're also covering topics that a
lot of us are experiencing but no one's really talking about,
which can make you feel really lonely and really looped up,
honestly and alone. And so we wanted to kind of normalize, unpack,
(28:34):
get into a lot of the things like miscarriage, like
how your marriage changes after you have kids, apologizing to
your kids after you've like lost it or messed up
or had a hard day.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:46):
No, we just wanted it to feel. There's a lot
of again parenting podcasts. I think they're all great, That's
why they exist. And I don't think we would have
started a podcast if we didn't think there was something
else that we really wanted to hear, like I just
want to end my day or whenever I'm listening to
my podcast, I want to hear I want to be
a best friend with someone like I wanna it is
(29:08):
really lonely sometimes you know, even if you have a
lot of people in your life, I mean, you're not
going out after bedtime all the time, where you're it
just can be really isolating. And I wanted a place
that felt like you're just chit chatting with your best friends.
And that's what we try. We're trying to do. And
(29:28):
like Dina said, it's just when I had my miscourage,
when I had pregnancy loss, I was I just remember
like desperately looking for other stories that were and I
could if I found one, it was amazing. Like I
literally went to different influencers pages and tried to see
if they had a highlight button that said loss or
(29:48):
something like that. And I think that's so applicable to
so much of parenthood and motherhood where it's like there's
not a whole lot of people talking about it, but
we're all oiencing it and we just want to unpack
it and just like get it out and make it
feel yeah, you know like you can you can share
it with people.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Yeah, talking about hard stuff can be so healing.
Speaker 3 (30:11):
Remember you're in it to hearing someone else's story.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
Yeah, you know, yep, so true.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
I'm sorry that you went through that.
Speaker 3 (30:18):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
I can't imagine thank you, but I do think that
it's amazing for you to be brave and talk about
it because I feel that, you know, there's just people
put so much shame behind so many things that shouldn't
be on them, and it's important people to know they're
not alone. Yeah, because there's so many people who deal
with things and nobody talks about it. So when people
(30:42):
do that, it opens up the door for others to
feel safe to be able to do that as well.
Speaker 3 (30:47):
Yeah, And I mean that's that's the literal, whether it
doesn't have to be on a podcast or like the
three million followers. It was just in my own neighborhood
when I shared we had the loss, and then I
shared I was going to do IVF, but I felt
like so much shame almost, And I distinctly remember this
moment because it was my pregnant neighbor down the street
(31:08):
and she had two girls and I had two girls,
and she was pregnant. God, I was so jealous. I
was so jealous, and I told her that I was
gonna start IVF and I was kind of staying to
She's like, oh, I did IVF for this baby, and
she was it was like the exact same experience, like
she did it in January she was gonna have a boy,
and I was like, oh, when I share something, I
might actually learn that all of these other people are
(31:30):
experiencing exactly what I'm experiencing. And so it could be
about anything in parenthood and motherhood, but I just think
it's one area that we're only touching the surface of
finally being able to like share and not put on
this facade of like everything is great, everything is great,
and it just feels so nice that people are now
starting to kind of like once one person shares.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
It's like, oh God, okay, me too, Like I did
that too.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Yeah, so this is gonna be fun. Some of the
members my eleven eleven media team, and they submitted these questions,
so they're gonna ask them to you, let's do it.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Do ghost task?
Speaker 3 (32:08):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Hard, Yes, yes, they do absolutely, and they have to
be potty trained too.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
How does the tooth or you know I lost her tooth?
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Wow, honey, this is like a Santa question.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
There are satellites.
Speaker 3 (32:26):
Yeah, I don't know. How does the tooth fairy?
Speaker 1 (32:29):
It's not me. I'll tell you that, it's definitely not me.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
We don't have an answer. I skip next like a
past Yeah, I a glove real absolutely without a doubt. Yes,
I think you can ride them in LA Yeah. To
be honest, only in Los Angeles, though, I really do
think there's like pony places that will do it. I've
looked to do it.
Speaker 1 (32:49):
Okay, you're not kidding, they're wow, yeah, book me one.
Speaker 2 (32:54):
Well, I can't have dizzil, but I.
Speaker 3 (32:57):
Think that depends on your home. Yeah you can. You're
say my house you can?
Speaker 1 (33:05):
Is this even a question? It's donks guys.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
Oh wow, I was like scared. As an Internet person,
We're gonna get some that are like, how dare.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
Okay, let me qualify it. I'm severely allergic to cats,
so that's where that comes from.
Speaker 3 (33:20):
I'm an official. All animals are wonderful. Okay, that's true,
They're great.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
Happened to the dinosaur?
Speaker 1 (33:26):
Pass, Honey, there was a big meteor that struck the earth,
terrifying for children. Okay, pass it's Prince of say yes yes,
oh real life one.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Yeah, Well that was so much fun. Thank you, girls,
and I can't wait for the next episode, so everyone
stay tuned because that will be out soon. Loves it.
Speaker 3 (33:57):
Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (33:57):
Thank you, this was fun.
Speaker 2 (33:59):
Thanks thanks for listening to I in Paris. Don't forget
to follow us on Instagram at IM Paris Podcast, Email
us at Paris at iHeartRadio dot com. Be hot and
subscribe now loves it.
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