Gringo's Guide To: Trusting Your Gut & Following Your Heart w/ Rudy Valdez

Dramos is joined by filmmaker Rudy Valdez to discuss his pivot from being an actor to filmmaker, sharing the story of his sisters imprisonment, telling important stories from our community through film, his new documentary "Choir" and more!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:06):
Let me talk about talk.

Speaker 2 (00:08):
Here we go.

Speaker 3 (00:11):
He said he lived life as a ringo, where you
question when you fit in.

Speaker 1 (00:14):
Every time you mingle, they say you do this would not.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
Yes, Hello and welcome to another episode of life as
a Gringo. I am dramas of course, and man, amazing
guest on today's show. I'm very excited to bring you.
He's got a really dope documentary called Choir. Rudy Valdez
an amazing filmmaker. He's got a bunch of different products
we're actually gonna get into, just a really dope body
of work. He is somebody who has has made a

(00:43):
career of telling our stories and and really just one
of those people puts their their all into their art,
and I think has an amazing story when it comes
to not giving up on their dream and really putting years,
literally years and years and years into creating a idea

(01:06):
from nothing essentially, right, I'm being kind of bag because
I don't have to run the story. But basically, Rudy's
first big break was a documentary about his family, and
literally this was a passion project for years and years
and years until it saw the light of day and
became the thing that sort of began his career as
a filmmaker, and I just am always in awe of

(01:28):
people who have that kind of dedication and tenacity to
making their visions come to life. You know, I think
for me it's a soft spot because so much of
what I've been able to accomplish thus far has been
just through sheer dedication and not giving up. You know,
It's been a really long journey. Nothing has really come
easy at all. It's been incredibly difficult, and I've had

(01:51):
to keep the faith. And I think whenever I hear
people who have a similar story or know what it's
like to sort of just keep their head down and
think about the bigger picture and you know, not give
up essentially and then it pays off, that's always incredibly
inspiring to me.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
So I really resonated.

Speaker 3 (02:09):
With with with Rudy's story and just the work that
he's doing. Thing is amazing. So excited to have him
on the show. I'm not gonna lie, y'all, I'm I am.
I think I'm making it a habit of saying this
on every episode where I'm.

Speaker 1 (02:20):
Like I'm recovering. I'm being a little rundown right now.
But I think maybe I have I been going too hard.
I don't know. I got to ask the people close
to me.

Speaker 3 (02:29):
I am a little bit run down because I had
a party over the weekend. I have a party called
gom Fuego, which we did before the pandemic. It was
like a monthly DJ party, like me and a bunch
of my DJ friends and we would just get together
and like play all the music that we love, like
a lot of Latin music and hip hop and Gribbean
music and just global music, stuff that we can't really
get away with in normal club settings for too long.

(02:52):
We just make a night out of it. A lot
of Jersey club as well. It's just like stuff we
all really enjoyed doing and we play, you know, we
all go kind of back and forth playing quick sets
and just hang out with one another, and it's just
good for my soul.

Speaker 1 (03:04):
It makes you feel like a little kid again.

Speaker 3 (03:05):
It's like it's like the equivalent for me of when
you would go like to your friend's house to play
video games or whatever. Like that's what it feels like.
It's not even about money where you know, it's like
a passion project. So it's cool to do that for
the first time. In four years together and get everybody
you know under the same roof and we had an
amazing turnout.

Speaker 1 (03:22):
So it was just a great, a great weekend. But
I'm definitely feeling it.

Speaker 3 (03:25):
I'm definitely not recovering as quickly as I did four
years ago, where yeah, I could take a night out
like that and not really think much about it, especially
was on We did it on a Sunday, so it
just makes like getting into the week that much more difficult.
So yeah, I'm still recovering a bit. But we out

(03:46):
here and man, I'm just excited to be just getting
to this podcast. I'm rambling a little bit right now
because I'm I sat down. I just want to share
something against the Ambu with Rudy. But I sat down
in this chair, you know, and and like I'm adjusting
the microphone before I hit record, and it was just

(04:10):
like this wave of just like ah, it came over me,
if that makes sense, Like this just relief, this just
happiness to be here, this gratitude that I get to
be here doing this, and I just wanted to share,
you know that. That's what I'm feeling right now. It's
not lost on me how amazing it is. That I
get to do this, But also I think I'm forever

(04:31):
wowed by the fact that this is such a like
just released for me. It's a spiritual thing. It's it's
like you know, writing in my diary or my journal
or going to therapy or something. I don't know how
to describe it, but like, you know, I was just
you know, off today, just I was like exhausted, and
I'm like beating myself up a little bit because I'm like, man,

(04:53):
like you know, it's great to have fun and do
these parties, but like, you know, is it worth it
if it if you're going to be you know, not
operating you know, as your best self for the first
couple of days of the week because you're still recovering.
And you know, I was kind of beating myself up
about that a little bit of like kind of allowing
myself to be a little bit less disciplined, if you will.

(05:14):
But I am, you know, a let myself all the hook,
but be when I sat down this chair. The point
I'm trying to get at is when I sat down
in this chair to like get ready to record, it
was like who I feel good, Like just good energy,
good waves, just washed over me. So I'm just I'm
just grateful for that and just wanted to share that.
And I'm just so thankful that I get to do this.

(05:35):
And yeah, I think when you find something like that
makes you feel that way when you get when you
sit there and do it, especially when you're like, oh,
I don't want to do anything right now, I'm tired, I'm
gonna funky move, I'm procrastinating. I feel like doing this
Like I was doing that all day today and I
just sat in this chair. I was like, no, I
feel great. This is exactly what I'm supposed to be doing.
So yeah, even you're not getting paid for it, this

(05:55):
is just like it's a gift to find something that
provides you that sense of relief. So I just want
to share that moment of grad to what I'm having
right now as you recorded this episode. With that said,
now let's get into this conversation with an amazing filmmaker,
Rudy Valdez. I'm really excited to bring you his whole
story and all the projects he's been working on. I
think it's just incredible and incredible stuff. So without further ado,

(06:17):
we would do that all So no asking getting go
for today's segment, didn't have a question that made sense,
and I want to try to keep the episodes under
an hour if I can. I feel we're running a
little bit longer this season, so I'm trying to adjust accordingly.

Speaker 1 (06:27):
But now with that.

Speaker 3 (06:28):
Said, let's get to my conversation with Rudy Valdez as
a part of our Hente segment. My guest today is
a two time Emmy Award making filmmaker over here. He
has a new docu series called Choir that is now

(06:51):
available on Disney Plus. And he's just a man of
the culture, a man of the people, which we're going
to get into.

Speaker 1 (06:57):
Man, Rudy Valdez, how you feeling, my bro.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
I'm feeling good. I'm happy to be here.

Speaker 1 (07:01):
Thanks for having me, of course, brother.

Speaker 3 (07:04):
I mean I'm I'm really excited to get to have
a conversation with you today because you know, there's there's
obviously so much talk in general about representation right and
and for me personally, it feels like it's been such
a damn struggle to learn about Latin history and to
hear about our stories and and a lot of that

(07:25):
is because of the lack of representation and the lack
of projects that exists within media and and you know,
getting backed in the world of entertainment, right. And there's
a lot of conversations happening right now in the world
of entertainment talking about sort of that lack of inclusion
and diversity, right, And you're somebody who has taken the
hard path and decided that even with all of that

(07:48):
against you, you're gonna basically make it your main focus
to tell our stories, or tell culturally relevant stories that
are not necessarily going to be the sexiest topics for
a mainstream but you know, are in credibly important to
be represented. So I love to kind of just start
there and and talk a bit about, you know, what

(08:09):
was your your mindset, whether this was learned, whether it
was from the start when you got into filmmaking. I'd
love to just kind of know your own ration now
behind this incredibly difficult path that you've taken towards really
making sure that you're speaking to your community when you
tell these stories and when you make a film and
a docu series.

Speaker 2 (08:26):
Yeah, you know, it's a that's a great question, and
it's a sort of long complicated answer for me, you know,
as a as a Mexican American sort of growing up
born and raised in Michigan in the Middlewest. You know,
it's not that typical story that you hear when you
look out the media landscape and you think, oh, here's
a Mexican American. You never think Michigan, you know, from Midwest,

(08:51):
you know, so I think, you know, but growing up,
my my parents were, you know, before I was born,
they were migrantfield workers, and my older siblings were all
migrantfield workers. And the sort of stop around the time
that I was born, because my parents wanted me to
have a different path as far as education goes and
things like that. But one of the things that you
know they did do was, you know, my dad always

(09:11):
had a dream of having a little grocery store, and
that little grocery store ended up being sort of a
Mexican hub in our community where you know, we sold
everything from Barabacoa home Inde Dorthias to lay In the
Amara VHS tapes to Sente Fernandez and Julio Glesias and
Selina like all those things. So it was a place
where people could come speak English, speak Spanish, find things

(09:33):
that spoke to them, and you know, down to the
candles that are next to you. I mean we used
to sell those as well, Like I used to stop
those on the So, you know, culture was always a
part of where I grew up and or at least
my surroundings for my family. However, where I grew up,
I always had this sort of middle ground that I
had to play because you know, I was never sort

(09:55):
of brown enough for the brown people in my community.
I was never white enough for the white people in
my community. So I I always played this sort of
middle ground my entire life, and I think that that
had a big impact on me and who I eventually
became as a storyteller. You know, before I was a filmmaker,
I was an actor and a writer and a comedian.
And I felt like immediately going into that world, people

(10:15):
want to put you in a box. They want to say, oh,
you're brown, you're this, then you play this or you're this,
and you're going to be this. And I was always like, no,
I'm proud of who I am. I'm proud of where
I come from. But I never wanted anything to ever
stop me from doing anything. And so that was sort
of when I decided to become a filmmaker. When I
was able to become a filmmaker. I wanted to be

(10:39):
very proud of where I'm from, be proud of my experiences,
but never let it box me into the kind of
stories that I could tell.

Speaker 3 (10:45):
Sure, sure, yeah, I mean I'm resonating a lot with
you know, your story. I mean, obviously, it's like the
premise of this show is really those of us who
kind of felt othered even within our own community, you know.

Speaker 1 (10:58):
Yeah, And and.

Speaker 3 (11:00):
It's interesting because I what's resonating specifically for me is
I grew up with, you know, like the mayor of
proud Puerto Ricans in my father, right, Like he was
that guy, you know, always instilled a passion and the
love for me. But because I didn't fit into the
stereotype of what white kids thought of Puerto Ricans, or
even honestly, what other Puerto Ricans thought Puerto Ricans should

(11:20):
sound like, look like, dress like, or you know, have
interest in I sort of had wasn't accepted, you know
fully by either side, almost right, And it was this
weird frustration that would happen because they would call me
things like a fake Puerto Rican or whatever it might be, right.

Speaker 1 (11:34):
And in my mind, in my heart.

Speaker 3 (11:36):
I knew that we weren't just this monolith right where,
you know, for them, they're picturing you know, from from
the Bronx or something like that, right like that, that
sort of idealism right, very much times like hip hop
culture for many of us who grew up in that area.
And I knew when I would go back to Puerto Rico,
you know, we were very diverse group of people that
had you know, diverse you know, levels of interest.

Speaker 1 (11:55):
But it was frustrating because it was like nobody cared
to kind of listen to that.

Speaker 3 (11:58):
And I'm sure for you, you your parents have this
sort of community pillar in the grocery store right where
it's very much so tied into your culture, tied into
your community. You guys are actively supplying your community sort
of with the comforts of home. I'm sure for you
there was also there was frustrations in people sort of
questioning your authenticity as well, knowing just like how tied

(12:20):
to it you were.

Speaker 2 (12:21):
Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I you know, sadly enough, still
get that quite a bit to this day, you know,
And I think, you know, I won't say that I'm
not completely at fault there, because you know, I think
as I. You know, when my first film came out,
called The Sentence in twenty eighteen, it was it was
about my family, a Mexican American family. But I was

(12:43):
very cautious about leading with that, you know. To me,
I was like, listen, here's the representation. It's my family.
I'm telling my family story. I don't need to prove
how brown we are, how Mexican we are, how anything
we are. What I wanted to prove within that film
because it was a film that was about mandatory minimum
sentencing and the larger sort of criminal justice system as

(13:07):
a whole in our country. You know, I wanted us
to not be like, here is a token Mexican family
dealing with this issue. I wanted it to be like,
here is a Brown family who is a part of
the fabric of the community, part of the fabric of
this country. I wanted you to see us as Americans,
as people who are here and not I didn't want

(13:27):
to continue to autherize us and infection us off into
a certain group or demographic that is dealing with this
because it is something that we are dealing with as
a country and we are a part of that. And
so by doing that, you know, by continuing to not
necessarily at the beginning of my career do Mexican or
Mexican American centric stories right away, which was on purpose,

(13:51):
not that I don't want to do them, but I
wanted to show that I could tell any kind of
story so that I could never be boxed in. I
never wanted to be like, Okay, he's you know, I'm
proud to be Mexican. I'm proud to be a filmmaker,
but I sometimes I don't want that moniker of like
Mexican filmmaker, Mexican American filmmaker, because I feel like that
is very limiting. And if I'm a fabric of this country,

(14:14):
if I'm part of this country, and I truly am
a citizen of this country, I should be able to
tell a myriad of stories because we are a very
nuanced culture, we are a very nuanced people, and I
want to be able to tell all of those things.
And so I may have separated myself a little bit
at the beginning because I didn't want to be boxed in,
But at my heart, I'm extremely proud of who I

(14:36):
am and where I come from, and I just want
to be able to tell as many stories as I can.

Speaker 3 (14:42):
Yeah, you know, it's interesting because I definitely separated myself
a bit as well, and I struggle with that where
there's bits of like I don't know if it's shame,
but it's also like, man, I wish I would have
sort of come to this place of feeling comfort in
my authenticity a lot earlier in life, you know. But
also I I think it's like this burden that we
often bear as well, right, because it's like, you know,

(15:05):
like we could stay in your world, you know. Somebody
like like Robert de Niro is just recognized as this
amazing actor, right, and he's done a lot of the
sort of quote unquote stereotypical Italian American stories, and we
love him and know him for that, but we don't
box him in as like, oh, Robert DeNiro can only
do a Mafia movie, right, And for us, it's like
we almost have to shun or sort of you know,

(15:27):
put to the side our authentic self in order to
prove this thing that not everybody else does.

Speaker 1 (15:32):
And it's this burden of like where do you fall
in line with that? Right?

Speaker 3 (15:35):
Do you you know, completely sort of alienate your culture
and just approve this point that you could do anything
or do you know, sort of be okay with just
having to be in this box even though you know
you're capable of so much more, right, And it's just
such a weird and complicated line to walk, not only
career wise, but I think just like existentially as a
human being.

Speaker 2 (15:55):
Yeah, agreed, like full agree. And I think that both
things come with their own sort of wait. You know,
you know, no matter which way you you do that,
you know, I certainly feel and I think John Aguzema
was talking about this recently about you know, when we
break out of that box and we try to do
these things outside of the box that people see us,
and we don't always get that chance to fail, you know.

(16:17):
So so it's like we don't get we don't what
does he say, We don't get our ishtar, we don't
get our ability to go out and flop and then
come back and do something else. It's like we fail.
Then it's like, okay, well we gave that guy a chance,
or we gave that person a chance, and well they
couldn't do it, and so we get pushed aside oftentimes.
And so in the back of my mind, I'm like
Okay bye. By taking these risks, I'm really risking, you know,

(16:39):
if I have one thing that goes terribly wrong, that
could be it for me, you know, and that and
and so that's a that's a risk that I have
to take by by diving into the sort of larger
pond of you know, thinking outside of the box.

Speaker 3 (16:51):
Sometimes Yeah, no, of course, I mean, and and the
irony is like culturally aside, even just the career path
you've chosen in general is outside the So it's like
there's already pressure that comes along with that. Regardless of
who you are, where you come from, there's a risk
you're taking. You don't get many opportunities. There are plenty
of people who want to do what you do, but
sadly will never get the opportunity to actually make it

(17:12):
their career. Right, So there is it's a complicated sort
of dialogue that happens internally when you're chasing after this
dream that's already incredibly difficult, and then you have all
these nuances of trying to stay true to yourself. But
also like you know, as dirty, we have to play
the game to a degree, right, It's like, you know,
to a degree you have to play by the rules

(17:33):
that are set until you're the person in the position
to change the rules.

Speaker 1 (17:37):
Right.

Speaker 3 (17:37):
But until that point, you know, you do kind of
have to play the game a little bit. And I'd
love to pick your brain a little bit about that, right,
because you know, you're you're creating films, and obviously you
don't want them to just be something that sits on
your hard drive riding away somewhere, right. You want them
to be seen by as many people as possible and
to impact as many people as possible. Right, And you're

(17:58):
partnering with people like or the Disney Pluses of the world, right,
And within that, you then have to go sit in
an office or a room somewhere and convince somebody who
has no idea about your culture or the story that
you're telling, and tell them why this is worth them
investing their money and time and resources into, even though
maybe it doesn't personally impact them whatsoever.

Speaker 2 (18:19):
Right.

Speaker 3 (18:19):
So I'm curious, then, when you get put in those rooms,
how are you kind of walking that line? And you know,
even just inside baseball, for anybody who doesn't necessarily get
just how difficult it is to bring these sort of
projects to life and actually.

Speaker 1 (18:32):
Have them go across the finish line.

Speaker 2 (18:34):
Yeah, I mean, I wish that there was a magic
answer to that, to be like, here's how you pitch
and here's how you get it done, because there's not.
Because you know, like anything, especially in the entertainment industry,
you're going to hear way more nosy than you're going
to hear yes. And I think that for me, anytime
I go into any of these rooms or I'm pitching

(18:56):
a project, the most important thing for me off the bat,
because it's not a battle that I want to have
later on, is I like to wear my heart in
my sleep and tell you exactly what the vision is,
exactly why I'm the person that should be telling it,
exactly why this is a story that should be told,
and get them excited about this idea that listen, they
get to tell something from a perspective that maybe they

(19:17):
haven't heard before. That's something that's new and fresh, inherently
innovative because it's coming from a filtration system, a director
that you've never heard from before. And you know that
usually gets people excited because they want to be on
the cutting edge of those things. And you know the
fact of the matter is, you know our stories are important,
and they're they're entertaining, and they're hopeful, and they're all

(19:40):
of those things, you know, and you find the right executives.
And I've been very, very fortunate to find some really
amazing executives at at a lot of these places, At HBO,
at ESPN, at Disney. You know, there are people there,
especially as this as we start to grow in this industry.
One of the most amazing things that I'm finding, especially

(20:01):
over the last few years, is you know, going into
a room where you're pitching something, and you're starting to
see a lot more people who look like us in
those rooms. And I think inherently that means people are
going to start getting and understanding the different versions of
what it means to be a storyteller and a story
buyer and a story curator. So in some ways I

(20:23):
have it a little bit easier than people were trying
to do this, you know, even five ten years ago,
because these rooms are changing, and I think that that
is a big reason why people like me have been
fortunate enough to work and stay in this industry.

Speaker 3 (20:39):
I love that that gives me some hope to hear
something like that, you know that it is it is changing.
It is getting better. It is, you know, getting getting
diverse in those rooms. Man, loving this conversation with Rudy.
We're going to take a pause here, what's a quick break,
and then we'll be right back.

Speaker 1 (20:58):
All right, we are back now.

Speaker 3 (21:00):
I'd also be curious though, I mean, because when you're
a creative individual and you're pitching a project, it's more
than just a project, right, it's really an extension of yourself, right,
And it's hard and to your point, you are going
to hear more nose than yes is. But it's hard
to not take those nos personally, right, because again, it's
like it's you, right, this is your baby you spend

(21:20):
all this time on. It is sort of the story
that you've crafted or that you're seeing through your lens, right,
or you've edited, You've done all these different things, and
really it's an extension of yourself. What is sort of
your your tactic to bounce back from some of these
nose and not take it personally and not let it
sort of deter you from your your grander vision of
bringing this project to life for your ideas to life.

Speaker 2 (21:40):
Yeah, that's a great question. It's something that I try
to tell people who are trying to break into this
industry in a lot of different ways. So one of
the things that I'm very fortunate about with myself and
sort of my personality is that I am always working
on multiple, multiple, multiple things. I'm shooting this, I'm writing this,
I'm editing this, I'm pitching this, I'm doing all these

(22:01):
different things. And so a no to me never means no.
It means not right now, or not this, not this place.
And I learned something from a friend of mine who
he was an actor when I was start acting a
while ago, and he a sense like then, really really well,
he's you know, super famous all this stuff. But early

(22:22):
on I used to see him and you know, I'd
be going out for stuff and he'd be going out
for stuff and I'd say, oh, how did that audition go?
And he's like, which audition? And I would say, you know,
the one about X, Y and Z. And he would say, oh, oh,
I don't even know because he didn't sit back and
I'll go an audition for one thing and then sit
back and say this is my only thing and I'm

(22:43):
going to wait and see if I get this. He
was like, no, no, no, you audition, You're onto the
next Ye're onto the next year, onto the next year,
on to the next. You keep pushing that because if
you sit back and you wait for this one thing,
you're going to spend a lot of time in you know, anguish,
waiting for that answer, and a lot of time upset
because you're putting all their eggs in that basket. So
I'm constantly writing, I'm constantly coming up with new things.

(23:04):
I'm constantly pushing and sometimes, luckily, you know, you pitch
enough things, you talk to enough people, you you get
enough nose. Every now and then somebody's like, oh, remember
that thing you pitched us a year ago, how is
that doing? Sometimes they come back because a note doesn't
mean that it's not good. It means that maybe it

(23:26):
wasn't in the zeitgeistra it wasn't something that they wanted
at that time. But they keep seeing your face, they
keep seeing your work, they keep seeing and then they
start to see potential and even ideas you've had in
the past. And so you just keep working, you keep pitching,
and you keep working, and you keep moving forward because
if you have that one thing and I get that,
I get having that one thing that you're very passionate about.

(23:47):
But if you're a storyteller, you want to continue to
tell stories. So have those things you're passionate about. You're
passionate about everything, But keep innovating, keep having new ideas,
and keep being a storyteller, and you know, eventually things
start to work out. No.

Speaker 1 (24:04):
I absolutely love that perspective.

Speaker 3 (24:05):
It's like, not don't allow yourself to fall in love
with every idea as if it's your last idea, your
last opportunity, right, right, And and I want to backtrack
a little bit because you know, you mentioned you know
what kind of like your first big project as like
a storyteller the sentence, right, and that's about you know,
a very personal story about your sister. And I want
to know even prior to all that, like your family's

(24:26):
sort of reaction to you wanting to be an actor
than a filmmaker and all these different things, right, because
you know, there is a lot of immigrant guilt, right
that happens for a lot of families that really busted
the ass to come over here.

Speaker 1 (24:39):
And you talk about, you know, the struggle that your
your your.

Speaker 3 (24:42):
Parents sort of had the very common tale of working
out there in the fields, and that was sort of
the means to you know, getting by and building a life,
and then eventually, you know, they were fortunate enough to
get out of that and become business owners. But I
think a lot of the narrative that gets pushed upon
the next generation is sort of a guilt but also
fear of you taking a non traditional path and and

(25:06):
sort of all of the sacrifice they made sort of
being a race and being irrelevant at that point. So
I am curious sort of what your family dynamic was
in regards to their support or lack there of, of
your creativity and you're wanting to work with in the
entertainment industry.

Speaker 2 (25:19):
Yeah, I mean it was interesting because you know, my
parents and my father, I think, with a fourth grade
education in my mom with a third grade education at
the time. You know, he went on to have a
store and a restaurant and he you know, he's still
working to this day. And my mom went on to
have a twenty seven year career as a teacher, you know,
going to night school, figuring things out, and she's still

(25:39):
teaching today. She teaches you know, a head start, and
so they you know, they did a lot with with
sort of what the cards they had dealt with him,
and so I feel like there were a lot of
expectations on me early on, and I did my best,
but to be completely honest, I did not excel in school.
In middle school and high school. I actually did very,
very poorly, and it was a cause of a lot

(26:02):
of angst in my family because, you know, they never
said it to me, but I always had this impression
that looked they sacrificed a lot to give me an opportunity.
And I tried hard, but I just could never get
things going. And then one day I fell into theater
by complete accident, I was forced to take a theater class,
and a light bulb sort of went off in my
head that I've been told I was dumb for many

(26:26):
many years in middle school and high school, by counselors,
by teachers, by you know, I was put on this track,
and I realized, you know, I'm not dumb. My brain
just maybe thinks a little bit differently. And when I
found theater, a switch kind of went off. And I
think that both of my parents saw this little switch

(26:46):
go off in my head, and they were like, here's happiness,
here's joy, here's motivation, And they were like pursue that
go go and be happy. And so I, by a miracle,
through acting, got into a community college, and through acting
got from the community college and too Michigan State University,
a four year university, all because I was an actor.

(27:07):
And then before I even graduated college, I had this
sort of like bursting happening. I needed to go and
I was like, I'm leaving, and I went to New York,
you know, before I graduated college, and I thought that
my parents were going to be like, you know, you
need to finish college, you have to have a backup plan,
you have to do all these things. And they were like, go,
go be happy, go go do what is motivating you

(27:31):
to go to see the world. Because I think that
was another thing that really made my parents happy, was
that I wanted to go out and see the world.
I wanted to go out and see everything. And you know,
I didn't become a filmmaker for a few years later.
Until a few years later, and when that started to happen,
you know, i'd sort of settled into a bit of

(27:52):
a career. I was actually teaching at the time in
New York City and doing all these other things and writing,
and I had a play that traveled the country, and
then I was like, I'm giving everything up, but I'm
gonna I'm going to figure out how to become a filmmaker.
And I think that they just saw the look in
my eyes and they were like, okay. And so at
twenty eight, I went from you know, building a career,
a budding career, to unpaid intern and figuring out how

(28:14):
to scrap you know, the rent together. But I was like,
I need to figure this out. But they saw joy,
they saw happiness. They saw the fact that I was
willing to grind and put in the work, and they
never questioned me about any of that. They were like,
go and do the thing that makes you happy. So
I was. I was very very fortunate in that sense.

Speaker 1 (28:35):
Wow, man, shout out to your parents. That is fucking awesome.

Speaker 3 (28:37):
I think, yeah, that you know that that is so
huge because I think, you know, and it's obviously everybody's
doing their best. Are most of you know, parents who
aren't necessarily supportive of like their kids creativity.

Speaker 1 (28:47):
Don't They just don't get it right. They're not trying
to do it from a place of maliciousness or anything
like that.

Speaker 3 (28:53):
But we've also been bought and sold kind of this
idea of, you know, the path that it takes to
be successful in this country goes through school.

Speaker 1 (28:59):
Kylee, why pick of fence blah blah blah.

Speaker 3 (29:01):
Right, And I think the problem with school is that
it is this standard eyed system, So it's one size
fits all, standardized system, and anybody who doesn't sort of
fit neatly into that box is viewed as dumb as
you're talking about, or there's something wrong with them, they're
a weirdo, they don't, you know, whatever it might be.

Speaker 1 (29:19):
And rather than sort of trying.

Speaker 3 (29:21):
To figure out a way to see what works for them, right,
we sort of just throw kids away unfortunately usually Right,
And you're lucky that you found theater and fell into that.
And I think, again, salute to your parents for recognizing
like there's something special happening here. And maybe if we
even though we don't understand it fully it's not our thing,
we understand there's also something like otherworldly about the fact

(29:42):
that he's so incredibly passionate about this and it's speaking
to him in that way. And I think that is
sort of huge that they were just sort of allowed
you to do your own thing and saw that fire
at the end of the day, right, Because I'm a
firm believer that if you found something that really likes
that fucking fire underneath you, you're going to figure out
a way to make it work. Maybe it won't be

(30:04):
exactly according to your plan, right, and for everybody, there's
gonna be varying levels of success at the end of
the day, there are certain variables, but you're gonna find
some sort of way to make it work in some capacity, right,
something related to it, whatever it might be, If you're
truly that passion or that dedicated, you know, towards towards
putting in the work, I think that's sort of a testament,
is all, you know, to what you just said and

(30:25):
and your story.

Speaker 1 (30:25):
I just think that's awesome. I'm pumped up here in that.

Speaker 2 (30:28):
Yeah. Yeah, And I think you know, one of the
things that my parents always gave me was sort of perspective,
you know, this idea of like what success means and
how you measure success. You know. I think that's many
years ago, a few years ago, after I'd been fortunate
enough to win a couple of big awards, you know,
there were people who were like, oh, what's it like

(30:49):
to like, finally, you know, have this level of success
or this measure of success. I never knew how to
answer that, because, you know, when I again quit everything
and I had a budding little career going on and
quit everything to pursue filmmaking, I remember my mom never
saying don't do it. She said, what you need to
understand is and she knows nothing about the entertainment industry,

(31:12):
but she gave me this perspective. She said, what you
need to understand is success is relative. She said, set
a goal for yourself. What is a goal for yourself
that makes you successful for yourself? And I said, Mom,
if I can do this, if I can be a
filmmaker and make as much money as I'm making right now,
I'll be successful and everything after that is gravy. And

(31:33):
she said, then that's your goal. Then that's how you
measure success for yourself. And so when people would say that,
I would I'd never really wanted to be like, well,
actually successes, but in my mind I was like, listen,
nine years ago, I was able to make the same
amount of money that I was making, you know, teaching
after school programs and doing all these things, and you know,
making a living. I was able to do that nine years.

(31:56):
I was a success back then. It's all about how
you think about it. And so I was always grateful
for that because I see people who work in this industry,
in the entertainment industry as a whole, and all they're
doing is trying to figure out how much money, how
many things, how much stuff they can gather, and so
I feel like they're never going to be happy because

(32:17):
they're never going to understand that. You know, sometimes you
need to stop and take stock in the fact that
you're doing something that you love for a living. You're
able to pay your bills, like I have two young daughters.
I'm able to you know, have a wife and kids,
and I get to do this and this is my life,
and I understand that I'm extremely fortunate, and I never
take that for granted. And so I think that's one

(32:40):
of the great things that my parents really helped me with.
It was just that perspective of owning that for yourself
and not letting outside people put that value on you.

Speaker 3 (32:51):
Yeah, man, And that's the tough thing, right because you know,
as people who are creative and really making things happen,
you are obviously like a higher achieve for you. You
set grandio schools and you have a vision for like
I can, I'm capable of doing big things, and I
want to try to do bigger and bigger things, right
But on the flip side of it, you can become
obsessed with bigger and bigger and bigger, and then you're

(33:12):
sort of bypassing all of the moments along the way
that are still amazing, right like, like even you know,
and I struggle with that personally, be honest with you, you know,
I have so many ideas and things that I want
to do that at times I have to really stop
and remind myself of Like you're living the dream right now,
Like you know, you woke up when you wanted to today,

(33:33):
You're working on things that you're passionate about. Like nobody's
you know, breathing down your neck about some fucking report
they wanted the best by this time, right like, and
like I'm good, and I'm I'm you know, able to
pay the bills and not worry about it, you know,
And and you know that is like the sort of
balance that I've been trying to find because you know,

(33:53):
to your point, you can get into this sort of
place where it's a cycle of always wanting more and
more and more, and then that the happiness is always
just on the other side of the next accomplishment, right,
and you never actually get to feel it because you're
you're not you know, you're you're sort of living by
this standard that really doesn't exist, right, because there's always
going to be to your point about outside people kind

(34:16):
of you know, looking in or whatever, somebody's always going
to have more money than you. They're always going to
have more success, you know, more credibility, or there's gonna
be somebody who's never heard of you that then your
ego is hurt by that type of thing that never
seen your project, and you could be like, oh now
I got to make the project that this person can't
you know, help but stumble upon, right, Yeah, And you
really have to be intentional about, you know, finding somehow

(34:38):
some way to have that balance of being motivated, understanding
you know, you want to live up to your greatest potential,
but also recognizing that you know right now is okay,
and that that's incredibly difficult to what it's almost it's
a contradiction almost.

Speaker 2 (34:53):
Yeah, yeah, And you know, I will say another another
wonderful thing that I've had in my life from my
wife and kids, who've always kept me very humble in
every aspect of this. But one of my closest friends,
that person who I talked about earlier, who was an
actor and has become very successful, you know, one of
the things that we have always done because we knew

(35:13):
each other way back when we were just like just
making the rent by ten dollars, you know, it was
like barely there. And I remember he once went to
go and get aside job because he just wasn't able
to get enough work at a bakery, and he didn't
get the job, and I remember running into him on
the street and it was kind of a sad moment
because he really needed that job. But then a few

(35:35):
months later he ended up getting this huge acting gig
and everything sort of took off fro him. But every
time he gets a big role right now, I call
him and I'm like, remember, remember when you didn't get
that job, you know, and we just we keep reminding
each other of our sort of biggest mistakes and our
biggest value because it's like, listen, it can all be
taken away at any time, Like, don't go getting a

(35:56):
big head about who you are, like, you know, just
remember you're still that shithead that lived in you know,
in this you know, tiny apartment, and we're trying to
so you know, never forget that, and we we always
have this. Any we know that the call is coming
when something is announced or like a project announced, its
like I know he's calling you right now to be like, hey, shit, edit,
don't don't let this go. It could be taken away

(36:17):
at any time, so you know, just just always remembering that,
you know, there are a million people who want to
be able to do this, and there are a million
people who are capable of doing this. So we're always
very fortunate to be able to tell stories for a living.

Speaker 3 (36:31):
Yeah, I mean, that's that's beautiful to have somebody in
your life that can kind of be that for you,
you know, and keep you grounded. And I want to
get into obviously your your projects and a lot of
the work that you've done. I am really curious so
about this that one particular time period of years though
when you say you're like twenty eight ish years old, right,
and you're just kind of like, fucking I'm going to
just start all over and try to just become a

(36:52):
filmmaker at this point, right, I'm curious what was going
on in your mind and your spirit and your heart
during that time period that you know, sort of made
you take the drastic step to really just start completely over,
especially at a point. Those are the years where like
you're watching your friends get married, right, and you're watching
people get real jobs or buying houses and things like

(37:13):
that at that time, and you're deciding probably just going
to start over and take another crazy path on this
dream of mine.

Speaker 2 (37:19):
Yeah. You know what's interesting is I am very very fortunate,
Maybe not fortunate, but I'll say fortunate in the idea
that I actually have the moment that I became a
filmmaker on camera. Like I'm literally holding a camera because
you know, my sister was found guilty of a first
time non violent offense and got a fifteen year federal

(37:42):
prison sentence. And I remember the day after she went away,
I went to her house and I picked up a
camera and I was filming with their kids. Because not
for any reason, I wasn't a filmmaker then. I had
no aspirations of becoming a filmmaker. I just wanted to
try and capture moments. So that one day when she
got out, I would be able to show her kids
growing up like I just wanted to be able to

(38:03):
see that. And so I flew back to New York.
I was living in New York at the time. And
then a few months later I flew back because your
older daughter was having a dance recital and I wanted
to go there and film that for her. I wanted
her to have that one day when she came home
and I'm filming her daughter get ready and she calls.
My sister calls, completely organically, completely unexpected, and my sister

(38:24):
says to her daughter, do you know what Mommy's going
to do when you go to dance. I'm going to
lay it down in my bed. I'm going to close
my eyes, and I'm going to think about you. And
in that moment, watching the reaction of her then five
and five year old daughter, I thought to myself like something.
It literally was like a lightning bolt. It said, Rue,
do you have an opportunity to tell a story that

(38:46):
people don't always get to see the ramifications of the
children left behind due to these mandatory minimums. It literally
all came to me at that point and I said,
I have to learn how to do this. And so
from that moment on, I was like, I'm a filmmaker
and I don't know the first thing about it. I
don't know what the hell I'm doing, but I'm going

(39:06):
to figure that out. And so, just like when I
discovered acting when I was a junior in high school,
this sort of light bulb went off and everybody around me,
my she was my girlfriend at the time, like saw
that in me, and she was like, go for it.

Speaker 1 (39:22):
Do it.

Speaker 2 (39:23):
Everybody was just like go And so I quit acting,
I quit writing, I quit all the other things, I
quit teaching, and I said, I'm going to figure out
how to do this. And the first thing that I
had to come to grips with, as you were saying,
you know, you look around and you see other people
your age accomplishing all these things and doing all these things.
And one of the things I had to deal with

(39:43):
was there were many other people working in film as
I was trying to, you know, get on as many
sets as I could and learn as much as I could,
who were way younger than me, who already had feature films,
films at Sundance, films at Trebeca, films at all these
other places, and I'm obviously being compared to them everyone
around me, and I had to just come to grips
that I'm running my own race, that I cannot sit

(40:05):
there and say I have to do this by this
age or this by this age, or I have to
figure this out. I made that film for nine and
a half years before I became a director, you know.
But if I were like, I have to do this
by x age or complete this by this age, I
would have never done anything. I needed to block out
all of the comparisons, all of the expectations from other people,

(40:27):
all of the people said I should be doing because
I had my goal, my measure of success, my level
of what I needed to be accomplishing. And that's the
only reason why any of it worked. And I was
fortunate enough to have the people around me that believed
in me. Like my girlfriend at the time, who was
now my wife, She was like, I believe in me.

(40:48):
Keep going, you have something special here. So you know,
a lot of luck, a lot of luck.

Speaker 3 (40:56):
Yeah, yeah, but I mean, but it's also vision and
then following that vision with action, right, because I think
that's that sort of helps create that luck or at
least put you in the pathway to finding that luck.
You know, it's you seeing this because theres a lot
of people would have gotten that idea and been like, oh,
this is an important story, but never actually really go
one hundred percent in on it and trust their gut

(41:18):
at that point, like this is what I need to
be doing, right, and I'm you know, last kind of
thing on that I'm curious for you was if there
was a bit of an ego death that needed to
happen to transition from actor in front of the camera
to then sort of saying I'd sort of rather be
telling the story. I mean, I know you were writing
already and things like that, but I'd imagine, you know,

(41:43):
there has to be some sort of transition in your
mind that happens, right, because most people are gonna always
recognize the person in front of the camera, and of
course they're going to have the fans of film and
things like that, who are going to know who you
are by by your projects. But it's a much smaller
audience who's going to recognize you, you know, from those
those things, you know, without sort of some sort of introduction, right,
So I'm.

Speaker 1 (42:02):
Curious for you.

Speaker 3 (42:03):
Was there a bit of an ego death that needed
to happen in making that transition from in front of
the camera to behind it.

Speaker 2 (42:10):
You know what's interesting is I had such a passion
for acting and such a truly I don't fully understand
what happened, but the second my mind switched over to
I'm going to become a filmmaker, yeah, it almost transferred.
You know, I never had that longing anymore to go

(42:31):
and perform, or to get in front of the camera
or to you know, I had a one man show
that traveled the country. I didn't all that fire that
I had in me to try and perform and try
and do all those things. Weirdly just sort of transferred.
And it made me feel like that was all of
those no's, all of the trying, and all the storytelling
and all the things that I experienced in that world.

(42:54):
I was able to use all of those as a
storyteller behind the camera. And so it felt like that
was a stepping done for me to be able to
do this thing that I'm supposed to be doing. And
so I never I never sort of looked back or
second guested. I was like, this is where I'm supposed
to be, comfortably behind the camera, behind everything in the corner,

(43:17):
writing and doing and doing all those things outside of
being in the forefront. And that's where I'm honestly the
most comfortable. And Yeah, it's so strange because I think
about it to this day. The passion that I had
for acting and the passion that I had for all
of those things. It felt like just a transfer, Like
it just like moved and it was like, now do this.

(43:38):
This is where you're supposed to be.

Speaker 1 (43:39):
All right, I'm happy here. One more time.

Speaker 3 (43:41):
Let's take a quick break and then we'll be right back.
All right, we are back. So it's the sentences the
project we're talking about, right, this is your first storytelling experience,
and obviously it's an incredibly personal one and you did
it with HBO.

Speaker 1 (43:57):
But like, so I'm gonna readed just like the liner.

Speaker 3 (44:02):
Notes of of sort of the project itself sort of
behind the scenes. So it's shot over the course of
a decade, right, you uh, worked as a as a producer, editor,
sound mixer, production assistant and everything in between basically to
learn how to do all of these different things for
this project. And then on top of it, it is
also a story that is showcasing your family on a

(44:28):
I don't know, in a in a light that many
might be scared to even talk about out loud to
people they meet on the street or even those closest
to them, right because of.

Speaker 1 (44:36):
The sort of full pot that it is to to be, you.

Speaker 3 (44:40):
Know, have a family member in prison, right or to
your point what we're talking about earlier, where.

Speaker 1 (44:44):
There are a lot of stereotypes about people of color.

Speaker 3 (44:46):
Right, and and and we're very much aware of not
wanting to be just another statistic, right, I mean this
how how you know, did you sort of balance this
sort of the technical aspect of doing all of this
but also at the same time being able to let

(45:09):
your guard down enough to just let this story be told.
I mean, I'd imagine this must have been an incredibly
difficult sort of journey for you in so many different ways,
both personally and skill wise and everything in between.

Speaker 2 (45:24):
Yeah, I mean it was exactly that. And I think
that those two things went hand in hand, because you know,
on the one hand, I'm the director, EP, cinematographer, a
sound person, producer on this film that nobody knows about,
you know, that I'm making by myself. And on this side, I'm,
you know, a PA who's just like wrangling cables and
you know, trying to figure out all the things and

(45:44):
try and get close enough to the camera so that
I can write down settings and write down what they're
doing so I could go home and figure out what
all of it meant. And so I was sort of
playing those two roles, and I think as far as
the sort of emotional capacity that I needed to figure
out with the sentence I'll never forget, you know, I
was really playing catch up for the first couple of

(46:06):
years of making that film as I was learning how
to do it. But I was filming with my family
at a Thanksgiving gathering, and I think at this point
in my life, my father had only ever cried in
front of me, I think once, and I'm filming with him.
My sister calls again, completely organically, and she calls and
my dad starts to talk to her on the phone,

(46:28):
and he starts to cry. And I remember thinking, in
the back of my mind, Rudy, when you started this
and you asked your family if you could tell this
story and make this film with them, you said, if
you're open and honest and vulnerable, I will figure out
how to make something good. And by good, I don't

(46:48):
mean awards or things like that, I mean for the
greater good. I'm going to take this pain, I'm going
to take what we're going through, and I'm going to
make something for the greater good. Dad. I'm going to
make something for the greater good. Mom. And so in
this moment, my father is being open and honest and
vulnerable and doing all those things that he promised he
would if the time arose. And I remember thinking, in

(47:12):
the back of my mind, Rudy, what the hell are
you doing. Put the camera down and go hug your father.
He needs you right now. And then something sort of
took over me, and it said, no, this is exactly
what you asked this, and they're giving you exactly what
you asked of them. So figure out a way, you

(47:32):
dumb ass. I remember like swearing at myself in my head,
figure out a way to tell the story. And so
in the back of my mind the technical aspect took
over and I started this mantra in the back of
my head, how's your shot? Are you in focus? Do
enough batteries? Do you have enough cards? How does it sound?
How's your shot? Are you in focus? Do you have
enough batteries? And so I had to create this almost

(47:54):
emotional barrier between me and my family for nearly ten
years in order to tell the story. And it was difficult,
and it's it's if I if there was one thing
that I could change about the entire process is figuring
out a way to not be so emotionally unavailable for
my family for nearly a decade. It was. It was

(48:14):
one of the biggest sacrifices of my life personally, but
it was necessary in order to tell this honest story.
So all of those things, all of the technical aspect
of learning, all the emotional aspect, all of those relationships
were playing in all these different lanes in my head
for the ten years that I'm doing this while trying

(48:36):
to work on everybody else's set to learn to be
better every time and go back and film to make
enough money to be able to go back and film,
to make enough money to pay my rent. So it
was a it was sort of a NonStop emotional technical
learning journey, you know that throughout the entire process.

Speaker 3 (48:54):
Yeah, man, I appreciate you you being so candid about that,
because I think it's just speaks to the idea of
of what greatness requires, right and what what is required
when you really want to do something profound, when you
really want to have an impact, and the level of
sacrifice that is needed to really create that that impact,

(49:15):
you know. And I think even for me, you know,
I I struggled a lot in radio and and you know,
early on and finding my voice and and finding success.
And it wasn't until I began to just peel away
the layers and and and stop trying to put on
the brave face and really got honest that all of.

Speaker 1 (49:34):
A sudden opportunities started flowing my way, you know. And
I think.

Speaker 3 (49:37):
It it just it speaks the idea that you know,
you you get as much as you give at the
end of the day, right, and and if you continue
to pour your heart into the things that you're doing
and be real and open about it, you know, people
will see that and sort of pour back into you,
you know, or the work will pour back and you know,
will showcase the amount of blood, sweat and tears that
you've really been putting into it, you know, And that's.

Speaker 1 (49:58):
That's just yeah, it's crazy.

Speaker 3 (50:01):
I'd imagine like going home at night after filming, especially
like that night with your dad, Like there had to
be some guilt within you where it was like, I
know that I just got this great shot, and the
filmmaker in me is so damn excited, but like the
son in me is like, I just had a missed
opportunity to share a really beautiful moment with my father.

Speaker 2 (50:20):
Yeah, one hundred percent. And you know what's interesting is
I put up such a barrier for so long making
that film that you know, we we eventually it was
done and we we had some great success. I got
into Sundance, We ended up putting the audience work at
Sundance and all these things. And I remember about four
months after the film came out, I had just the

(50:45):
biggest kind of emotional breakdown, probably result you know, the
result of a lot of guilt, a lot of wondering.
You know, people are saying it's a success and all
these things, but in the back of my mind, I thought,
did I exploit my family? Did I? It was this

(51:08):
truly for the greater good, And there was a lot
of good that came out of it. There was a
lot of but it was just something that I couldn't
shake and I almost never made another film. I didn't
want to do. I didn't want to make another film,
And it took my family actually expressing to me all
the good that came from it and all the healing

(51:28):
that came from it that allowed me to say, Okay,
telling stories like this can be a very great thing.
It can be a healing thing, and it doesn't have
to be for anything other than the people who you're
giving a platform too and the people you're helping. And
so they really saved my career in a lot of
ways by you know, and I didn't share with them
that I was going through this emotional breakdown, but they

(51:49):
they let me know. And you know, while I was
secretly going through that stuff, they didn't even know that
they were sort of healing me from understanding that it's
okay to tell these stories and it's okay to be
honest and vulnerable and and be be true to who
you are. But yeah, it was it was a very
you know what, what what in hindsight should have been

(52:11):
one of my happiest times as a filmmaker, because all
of these things are finally coming to fruition was probably
one of my lowest in my entire life. So it
doesn't come without other things. You know, the sort of
the accolades don't always come without you know that pendulum

(52:32):
swings book ways a lot of times.

Speaker 1 (52:34):
Yeah, no, I think that's beautifully beautifully said.

Speaker 3 (52:37):
I mean, and to your point, though, the the greater
Good is really showcasing this not often talked about story
of the criminal justice system and how the sort of
the cruel sentencing that happened really affected communities of color,

(52:58):
you know, and and the way that it tore apart
family dynamics because of just how harsh these these these
sort of laws were, and and the you know, the
rulings that happened as a result to the people who
committed these infractions. I'm curious for you in this project,
you know what, what was sort of the esme it's

(53:20):
more than just the project, you going through it with
your family. What was sort of the biggest eye opening
thing that you learned about kind of our criminal justice system?

Speaker 2 (53:30):
I mean so much. I mean, I learned that, you know,
one of the phrases that I always try to keep
in check is that people keep calling it a broken system.
And one of the things that I would always say is,
you know, it's not a broken system. It's working exactly
the way it's designed to work. You know, I think
that we're broken culturally by being okay with the constant imprisonment,
imprisonment uh and exploitation of our brothers and sisters. Like

(53:53):
that's where the where the shift has to happen. You know,
the laws and all those things will change when we
culturally shifting with We're not okay with that. We're not
okay with the warehousing of my brothers and sisters, especially
at our own cost, you know, financially, emotionally, spiritually, all
of those things.

Speaker 1 (54:10):
And so.

Speaker 2 (54:12):
It was very eye opening to see just how the
system works. But then it was also eye opening to
see how opening yourself up and telling the story can
help help sort of sway that system. You know. After
the sentence came out at Sundance, I got a call
and it was from Congress people from the right side

(54:33):
of the aisle, and they said, listen, for the first time,
I have something that I can go and show the
people on my side of the aisle that will say,
this is why we need to fight for mandatory minimum sentencing.
They said, because you didn't come out and attack us,
you came out and pull the story from the heart.
I can always share a story from the heart when
my colleagues don't feel attacked. And they said, we'd love

(54:54):
to show this on Capitol Hill. And I don't know
what gave me the guts, but I said, you can
show on Capitol Hill if you make it a bipartisan screening.
I want people from both sides of the aisle there.
And we did a screening on Capitol Hill and there
was a little article you can look it up on
the Washington Post that said a little known film helping
to make strides in mandatory minimum sensing. And they say

(55:17):
that we were a part of passing that first step back,
which ultimately helped release the release of tens of thousands
of people. And so we played a part in one
of the biggest changes in mandatory minimum sensing in our
country's history. And it all started with believing in something
enough that you can make change from this tiny, tiny

(55:40):
portion and playing that long game and saying, continue to
tell it from the heart, value your voice, value your story,
and keep that at the forefront, and you can make
a difference. And you know, I try to share that
as much as possible because you know, again, I wasn't
a filmmaker When I started this, nobody thought I could
do this. I told I showed early footage to people

(56:01):
and they said, nah, not going to happen. Who cares?
And I took that who cares and I said, I'm
going to show you who cares. I'm going to show
you why people care. And they keep pushing.

Speaker 1 (56:12):
Man, I got fucking chills as you're telling that story.
That's that's crazy.

Speaker 3 (56:16):
That's that's so beautiful and so inspiring in you know,
why you should really just go with your gut, and
also how much sweeter it is when you're actually doing
things that are also of service to other people. Right,
I think that is is such a great story. To
kind of put a period on that sentence. And I

(56:39):
one thing though, are you so you work on this
project from what it was it twenty eight so almost
thirty eight, thirty nine years old?

Speaker 2 (56:45):
Yes, so it came on in twenty eighteen, and yeah,
I might have been twenty seven or something. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (56:53):
So if you're well into your thirties by the time
it's like done, yeah, I see. I love these kinds
of because most people would have just fucking given up
at that point, because late thirties to still be struggling,
like is a wild like place to be right, Like,
that's a scary, like worst.

Speaker 1 (57:11):
Case scenario for any creative person or entrepreneur.

Speaker 3 (57:14):
Whatever you're like, by if I haven't figured out by
this point, like maybe it's not for me. I love
these kinds of stories for that, I mean quickly, your
girlfriend who maybe was at your wife at the time,
I mean, like, how are you dealing with all of
those narratives and still finding it in yourself to just
keep going and feel like you're gonna be turning a

(57:35):
quarter at some point.

Speaker 2 (57:37):
So there were a couple things going on at the
same time. So while I was working on everybody else's
film to figure out how to make mine, I went
from an intern to a PA, to a sound mixer,
to an editor, to a producer, to an additional photographer
to a cinematographer. I built myself a career, all self thought.

(57:57):
And so I was shooting films for Sam Pollard and
Robert de Niro and Whoopee Goldberg and all the things.
So I was building a little bit of a career.
But what I wanted to be was a director. I
wanted to be the person telling the stories. And I'll
never forget, you know. And eight and a half, nine
years into making this story on the side, I had
this little tiny office in Brooklyn and I was in

(58:19):
there looking at footage at like two in the morning,
and I just broke down crying, and because I thought
I've been doing this for over eight years almost it
was nine years at the time. I was looking at
the footage and I was like, there's something very special
here and nobody's ever going to see it. And I

(58:40):
almost gave up right then. And I had just had
my first daughter, and I remember I had to leave
five weeks after she was born to go on a shoot.
And I remember it was five weeks to the day
that my sister had a fifteen year prison sentence dropped
on her and she had to leave, and I was

(59:00):
motivated again. I said, if she could do it, I
can do these things, and I can keep pushing. And
a few months later we found out that the story
was coming to an end and I was going to
have a film. But there were so many moments that
I should have given up, that everyone probably thought I
was going to give up. But you find ways, You
find ways within your life that continue to motivate you.

(59:23):
They're all there. If you're able to open your eyes
and listen sometimes and listen to what the world is
telling you, you know, keep pushing. Your voice is valuable.
Your voice means something and it shouldn't be given up on.

Speaker 1 (59:37):
I love that.

Speaker 3 (59:38):
And let's close out on the current project now, right,
so choir and it's out now on Disney Plus. I mean,
what is is sort of the synopsis of this story?
I know it's sort of a return to back home
almost in Michigan, right, So, so talk to me a
bit about what the story is about and what caught
your attention. Spoke to you about it as as far

(01:00:00):
as you know why the world needs to see this
and hear this story.

Speaker 2 (01:00:04):
Yeah, I mean coming back to Michigan and telling a
story from my home state was a major reason why
I wanted to come back and tell this. And I
think especially with the Detroit Youth Choir, who is this
amazing choir run by Anthony White and an amazing staff.
You know a lot of people know them from America's
Got Talent in twenty nineteen, they got the Golden buzzer
and had this beautiful moment and you know, I remember

(01:00:26):
actually being in a hotel on a shoot somewhere somewhere
in the world and watching them go through all that
and thinking to myself, Wow, like, what an amazing story,
what an amazing group of kids. And when this idea
presented itself to me from another production company, they said,
what's your vision and I was like, well, my vision
would be, first of all, to go into Detroit and
break down all of those stereotypes and tropes that you

(01:00:48):
normally hear about Detroit. You know, because I know that
you can go to Detroit and tell a beautiful story
about resilience, about agency, about hope, and not let these
kids in this program be settled down by what everyone's
preconceived notions of what it means to grow up in
an inner city like Detroit is. Let them just be great,
let them just be kings and queens without this asterisk

(01:01:10):
next to them. I wanted to tell that story. And
as amazing as AGT was for them, it was not
the beginning. They've been doing this for over two decades,
and it is not the end. They're doing so many
more amazing things, and I wanted to encapsuley and tell
all of those stories from a lens of beauty, not
a lens of woe is me storytelling, not a lens
of feel sorry for me, but a lens of be

(01:01:32):
proud of us, be proud of who we are, and
watch what we can do. When the expectations are high,
we will meet those expectations.

Speaker 3 (01:01:41):
Is that is beautiful? And you know this is close
on for me. I mean, I grew up in the Bronx.
My mom was a teacher in the South Bronx, you
know rough area, and you know, a lot of these
kids are dealing with so much shit that the average
person would just would never even even comprehend, right, But
they're going in their day in and day out, expect
to go to school and do all these things when

(01:02:01):
they're having you know, family who have drug problems, criminal problems.
You know, their parents aren't picking them up from school
because they're off doing god knows what right there, and
they're not.

Speaker 1 (01:02:09):
They're kids who were just born into this.

Speaker 3 (01:02:11):
They weren't asking for any of these things, right, and
they're they're have all the cards stacked against them, be
it the you know, the the family they were born into,
be it the government, the prison system, all these different things,
and most of the time they just need somebody to
give a shit about them in some sort of way
and give them some sort of opportunity to see a

(01:02:34):
different life, right, And I think that's why this is
so touching, you know, the sort of stories. It's like,
these are kids who were given the opportunity to do
something outside of the norm and they're excelling at it,
and it's it's this special thing that I'm sure had
a profound impact on the entire community as a whole
and will continue to inspire other kids, you know, for

(01:02:56):
generations to come, which is the beauty of.

Speaker 1 (01:02:58):
This type of story.

Speaker 2 (01:02:58):
Yeah, exactly, man.

Speaker 3 (01:03:01):
Well listen, Rudy, It's been a pleasure getting to talk
to you and hear your story. It's super inspiring and
I love all the work that you're doing, so I
definitely salute you on that. Where can people keep up
with you all the projects that you're working on? You
want them to follow you anywhere?

Speaker 2 (01:03:14):
I'm on Twitter and Instagram at the real Rudy be
It's spelled r E E L Rudy. Are you d
y V? I thought I was very clever with that name.
Not so much, but I also have a website Rudybaldez
dot com and yeah, I try to update my social
media as much as possible. I'm not very great at it.

(01:03:35):
But I also wanted to say, this was such an
amazing interview, and I want you to know that your
authenticity and your heart really shines, and the way you
listen and the way you ask questions, it's really refreshing.
So thank you for that.

Speaker 1 (01:03:48):
Man, Thank you so much for saying that I received that.
I really do appreciate that so much.

Speaker 3 (01:03:51):
Man, And well, choir out now on Disney Plus. Go
check that out and all of the other amazing projects
that Rudy has worked on. This and everything else amazing stuff. Man, Listen,
you can come back anytime you want to. I appreciate
the conversation.

Speaker 2 (01:04:06):
I appreciate you. Thank you man.

Speaker 3 (01:04:07):
Big shots to my guest this week, Rudy Valdez for
hopping on the show.

Speaker 1 (01:04:13):
Just Matt.

Speaker 3 (01:04:13):
I you know, I know we've been doing a lot
of like Hollywood esque conversations. I don't mean Hollywood in like,
oh you're being Hollywood, I mean like just conversations surrounding Hollywood.

Speaker 1 (01:04:23):
But I think it's it's incredible to kind.

Speaker 3 (01:04:26):
Of peak behind that curtain, you know, when you talk
about media in general, and just how large of a
role media plays in shaping the way that we see
the world. And I think it's amazing to see people
like Rudy and and Alinda, who had on the show
I think it was last week or the week before,

(01:04:47):
just you know, really making it their life's work to
elevate our stories, to tell our stories, you know. And
I think it's a beautiful, incredible, much needed thing that
I think it has more of a profound effect than
anyone of them will ever probably realize. You know, so
many people can see themselves in their work and might
be inspired or feel comforted. And I think that that's

(01:05:11):
sort of this it's it's just this sort of priceless
thing that we can't even really quantify the value that
it brings to somebody's life. I know, there's so many
times where I watched the documentary or a movie and
left feeling seen or inspired and it just fired me

(01:05:34):
up to go, you know, one hundred miles an hour
towards my goals or my visions, you know, And there's
so many different things that have inspired me like that,
and I you know, I wouldn't be here probably if
it wasn't for a lot of the content that I ingest,
or creators who are making content that inspires me. So
I think it's just, yeah, you got to salute people
when they're doing the work and telling important stories rather

(01:05:58):
than just sort of creating nonsense that really has no
real value in the long run. So salute to them
and really making sure they elevate our communion and help
put us in that spotlight.

Speaker 1 (01:06:09):
So it's a beautiful thing. Now.

Speaker 3 (01:06:11):
With that said, like I said before, no ask a
getting go for today's show. So let's tie everything we
talked about today in a neat little boat in a
segment we call conclusion.

Speaker 1 (01:06:20):
Stew the first to take a quick break, and then
we'll be right back time for Come.

Speaker 3 (01:06:32):
Soon. There are a lot of things I feel like
I can take away from from Rudy's story.

Speaker 1 (01:06:40):
I think I just think in general, man like.

Speaker 3 (01:06:47):
You look at somebody like him and kind of where
he saw himself, and he was an actor and all
these different things. And I love when people are unafraid
or push past the fear of shedding the old version
or idea of themselves to embrace the one that suits

(01:07:07):
where they are in their life at that moment. I
think a lot of us find it really difficult. We
get attached to an identity and we create sort of
this life or this goal of what we want our
life to look like, and we get so hyper fixated

(01:07:33):
on it. And again, I think, obviously, when you set
out to do something, to live a certain way, to
obtain certain goals or whatever, yeah, you have to be
hyper fixated on it. But you also have to have
real conversations with yourself because sometimes.

Speaker 1 (01:07:50):
That goal that you set out on the real purpose.

Speaker 3 (01:07:54):
When you zoom out eventually, you know, years later or
whatever it might be, sometimes you recognize the purpose was
never actually to achieve it, like the universe had something
else much better for you, but you needed to sort
of set this goal just to go off.

Speaker 1 (01:08:07):
On your journey. And I've talked about this a bunch.

Speaker 3 (01:08:09):
But I love the idea of the pivot of really
just checking in with yourself and saying what would actually
make me happy?

Speaker 2 (01:08:18):
Now?

Speaker 3 (01:08:18):
Am I doing things currently just because the old version
of me, like you know, said this is what our
life is going to look like? Am I still honoring
the evolution of myself?

Speaker 1 (01:08:28):
Right?

Speaker 3 (01:08:28):
And I think for me, I resonate with that so greatly.
Like I think about djaying. You know, djaying has completely
shifted for me since the pandemic. You know, I essentially
took off almost two years from regularly djaying. You know,
even as things open back up, I wasn't going back
into djaying, And this is something I love doing. Music
had always been a part of my identity, you know.

(01:08:50):
I was a DJ and producer and everything else second,
and my goal was to be this DJ, touring around
and producing music and all these different things. And I
apologize if this is redundant for me who's been listening
to show for a while. But now DJing has turned
back into a passion for me, like a hobby. It's
no longer work. I'm not doing it as it means

(01:09:11):
to pay bills. You know, yes, of course the extra
money is great, but I'm not using it as my
main source of income or even something that I prioritize
as like one of my top sources of income. You know,
I only play venues I want to play at. I
only work with people I enjoy working with. And for me,
it's back to just being a kid who loves music

(01:09:33):
and this is my outlet for that. And a part
of me had to have like an ego death, even
with like you know, leaving the breakfast club and things
like that.

Speaker 1 (01:09:42):
I've talked all about this stuff as well, But.

Speaker 3 (01:09:45):
It's again shedding the old version of yourself and embracing
the new and saying it's not a failure if I
move on before achieving said goal, because I'm not giving up.
I'm restrategizing. Essentially, I am actually checking in with myself

(01:10:06):
and designating something that would make me even happier than
the previous goal I had associated with happiness, right, and
I love that with Rudy, where originally it was to
be an actor, and then he just had this calling
to be a filmmaker and he just unapologetically pivoted into
that and embraced it and recognized that that this sort
of new version of himself right as we all continue

(01:10:27):
to evolve, would be much happier being a filmmaker than
being an actor.

Speaker 1 (01:10:33):
And obviously it's easier for others, you know.

Speaker 3 (01:10:38):
I when that transition happens, I think for me it
hit me hard where it was like, oh man, I'm
taking a step back from the limelight, and my ego
had a problem with that. My ego was having trouble
accepting that, and it took a bit to adjust to
saying like, I don't need to be rubbing elbows with
celebrities every day. You know, that's not really what makes

(01:10:59):
me happy, even though that was a part of my
goal originally. I'm not failing, I'm not giving up. I'm
moving on to make the new version of myself happy
rather than like, you know, you can't keep playing in
the same spaces and you know, hanging around the same
places and doing the same things and expect to have

(01:11:20):
different results at the end of the day.

Speaker 1 (01:11:21):
I think that's what I'm trying to get at.

Speaker 3 (01:11:23):
And I think oftentimes we hang on to these old
ideas that the old version of ourself wanted so badly,
and out of fear, out of ego, out of shame,
of feeling like a failure, of giving up. We fail
to give the new version of ourselves what it needs
because we're hanging out to an old life, an old

(01:11:44):
dream that really no longer serves us, but it is
comfortable at the end of the day. And I guess
that's my big takeaway from the conversation with Rudy, and
I just love that idea of just opening another chapter
you know, and not getting fixated on just one thing
and thinking that you're like life only has one story
within it sort of.

Speaker 1 (01:12:02):
So that's my two.

Speaker 3 (01:12:03):
Cents on that, and again, big shots Rudy Valdez for
hopping on the show. His documentary Choir is out right
now on Disney Plus. You can go ahead and check
that out. Again, just suit him and all the work
that he's doing and being an inspiration. Whether here is
realizes it or not, you know, I'm inspired by it.
It definitely, you know, I think is right in line
with how I view life right now. And it's kind

(01:12:26):
of good to to see somebody pivoting, having success doing
so and not looking back. I think it's further validation
for me that, you know, we're not meant to just
have sort of this one path. That's okay to deviate
when when you feel like something else is calling your
heart and you should probably listen to it at the
end of the day.

Speaker 1 (01:12:46):
So beautiful stuff.

Speaker 3 (01:12:47):
Now, with that said, I will catch you on Thursday
for our Thursday Trends episode until that stays safe and
we'll talk soon. Life as a Good Ino is a
production of the micro through Podcast Network and iHeartRadio