Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Has my tangent. Fun fact, just been eating away at you,
all of you guys, just like so excited to know,
are you like so excited? I hit the intro. Let's
do this. It's the tangent with the bread show giving
me all this we couldn't talk about on air. I
wish I could credit whoever sent this to me, and
I'm sorry that I can't, but thank you. You know
who you are. Somebody sent me an actual page that
(00:24):
they took out of, they took a picture of from
the book She Comes First. And I guess these are
a bunch of tips for men and women or whomever
is attempting to navigate the female body, which I mean,
you may as well be Christopher Columbus out here like
an explorer, because it is. It can be something. It
(00:44):
can be treacherous, let me tell you. Oftentimes I point
the boat in one direction. I don't know where I'm going.
I don't I don't know where I'm going to wind up.
I'm just I'm just trying to hit land. That's it.
I'm just trying to find the buried treasure. That's it.
That's all I'm trying. Yes, where is the booty? However,
she for some reason wanted me to share this in
(01:04):
fun fact, and I really couldn't on the air because
it gets a little bit specific. But this might blow
you all away. Don't mistake her subject for an object,
namely the clitterists, with its eight thousand nerve endings oh yeah,
twice as many as the penis, and enviable ability to
(01:26):
produce multiple orgasms in a single session of sex, and
no known purpose other than pleasure. Is it any wonder
that sex therapists have proclaimed the clitterists a unique organ
in the total of humanity. It has over eighteen parts
to it. See this is the thing. Jason as a
(01:48):
gay man, but hear me out is a gay man.
Things are much simpler, aren't they.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
Yeah, there's I mean, there's multiple ways to do it.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
But I mean, but I mean, it's just it's motion
the no matter who I mean, Like a strong wind
hits me at the right angle and I'm good, Yes,
good for you. The same is not true for you, guys,
but not imagine the glitterist has over eighteen parts, both
visible and hidden, that participate in the production of pleasure.
(02:19):
I had eighteen parts, you guys. Contrary to conventional wisdom,
at least the kind that's common. The glitterist is much
more than a love button. It's a sophisticated network of
arousal that has more hotspots than a Layton volcano.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
It's not a button, right, you know what I always say.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
It's more than a button, Galen, it don't push on it.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
Like it's a button. I cannot fucking stand that.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
Okay, So for the men listening right now, ladies, because
you offer what would be your personal tips, I mean,
because again we're trying to help out mankind here. You
guys got eighteen parts down there, yeah, yes, in that
one area, yes, and eight thousand nerve endings. Okay, So
you would think it would be easy to find, but
(03:04):
it is indeed not always easy to find.
Speaker 4 (03:06):
My hope for men is just and this is even
just broader sense in life.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Learn how to read cues, because it's really that simple.
Speaker 4 (03:13):
You can tell if something feels good, and if it does,
keep doing that at that exact same speed speed.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
Correct.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
If it's not.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
Getting the reaction, try something else. Try until you get
the reaction, and don't do it for a couple of
seconds and stop. You need to keep the exact same
speed when you're getting the reaction.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
The worst is as a man. Maybe this is true
for you guys when you're doing your thing down there,
But the worst is like if I'm really up in there, yeah,
if my face is buried, and if I if I
hit the spot but I can't breathe, The worst is
like if I hit the spot and I know that
what I'm doing is working, you die and I can't breathe.
I'm like, I'm going to fucking pass out doing this
(03:52):
because I do not want to stop because I finally
fucking found it.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
What a way to go right all on the field.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
Does that happen you guys know where you're like, oh, here,
this is it, and now I have to give it
up my all. Like I'm gonna have to go out
like this.
Speaker 4 (04:04):
Yeah, I mean I try to breathe through my nose,
but yeah, because.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
It can be hard to do that when your entire
face is Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
No, I mean it's it's they don't call it a
job for nothing.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
Yeah, I mean it's.
Speaker 3 (04:15):
Work that has.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
Never thought of it that way.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
But okay, correct, Yeah no, but I give it my all,
you know, But yeah, No, there are times where I
like I might die here, like I come up and
I'm like, oh my god, my eyes are.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
But yeah, well that's the other thing is like you're
not doing and I know these are supposed to be
your tips. I'm sorry, but I want your feedback on this.
You're not doing any service unless you unless you really
just want it over. You're not doing any service by
making us think that whatever we're doing is working now,
because the truth is I'm a pleaser. I want it
to work. I want you to get off.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
So I'm just gonna do that thing every single time. Yeah,
and I'm gonna keep doing it for the reasons that
you just explained. So unless you just want the dude
to be done and off of, you do not do
that to yourself because it's simply it's it's what is it,
Freudian Pavlovian, You're simply reinforcing bad behaviors. Yes, any thoughts,
(05:10):
just liack it before you stick it. That's just you
take that period.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
You just take that which period it before you start?
Speaker 1 (05:17):
Okay it comes first? Yeah, yeah, all chasing any tips
of the gay men out there or or women.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
It's so simple, Like we're just too simple, Like what
are the actually want.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
To teeth, I guess, like no teeth like an actually
touch my balls.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
I mean, yeah, you want to make some such balls.
Speaker 4 (05:37):
Don't get started on the balls because you don't like it.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
But a lot of some people.
Speaker 5 (05:42):
My I personally do not because I'm afraid they're going
to go up in me. And that's one of my.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Why why would your balls go up any Since.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
I heard that something that could happen?
Speaker 5 (05:50):
It's all I think about every day because I'm so
scared they jumping.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Most likely that your balls are to go inside of you, though,
is when you're cold. It has nothing to do with
anybody touching them because you're you know, you're If you've
noticed when you're cold, your testicles tightened, it's to hold
them closer to your body to warm them up, right,
But that's not going to happen from somebody touching them.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
It's all I think about.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
It really is.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
It really is so I can't survive. But it's just
it's easy.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
I mean, yeah, you want to make a little bit
of suction with your mouth, I mean you know, yeah,
you want to. I guess that's what a vagina probably
feels like if you do it right.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Yeah, I guess the other thing is like all the
all the throat noises, like is that is that real?
Or is that just you making me feel like you
can barely accommodate it.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
I have a small mouth a lot of times, and
it actually is real, you know, because.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
It's like, oh, I'm so big, Like right, that's what
I mean. You feel good though, But like here's the
thing is, you know me, I'm a thinker, So like
when I when that's going on, or when someone's like,
oh my god, you're so big, it's like shut up.
But my thing is my thing is like is that
is that what you're Is that just what you're like?
(07:03):
I don't know, Like if you were to ask me,
am I actually I don't know the answer because I
don't know if that's just what you guys say. Because
if you were to ask me like, is my stuff
you know whatever? If I like you and I'm and
I intend to keep using it, then then yes, the
answer is it's the fucking most amazing I've ever had.
Like what am I going to say to you, Like, eh,
it's I you know, Like, no, I'm not gonna say that.
(07:25):
I'm going to tell you that it's great. So I
guess what I mean is as a little bit of
an insecure person and an overthinker, I don't necessarily believe
all the compliments that you guys give because I just
figure that's what you tell everybody.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
I never lie, like my compliments are always true, Like
I wouldn't be like this is the biggest I've ever
seen if it's not. But I do, you know, like
to be a little more enthusiastic so that you feel good.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
No, And I think that's great. I just don't know.
I don't know whether to take that as you're actually
struggling with it or like you know or you're.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
It's not easy either way.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
So well, you know, like Kiki, you got to look
on your face like you want to say you have nothing,
you got something to say, you're just not saying it.
Speaker 6 (08:05):
No this with you, like, shut the fuck up if
it's not real. Like I don't want to hear all
the extra stuff, Okay, I say, yeah, that's why you humble.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Yeah every time.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
I don't mind a little talk talking.
Speaker 1 (08:17):
No, I like it. I just want to believe that
what you're telling me is real and not just trying
to make me feel good. Because it's like if that's
the case, then just I don't know, Well it's okay, yeah,
you know, yeah, I guess I'm not the best of
it or the biggest or whatever. Yeah, so I just
figure I'm not.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Just stop overthinking.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
It's just easier. It's easier for me just to figure
that i'm not, because I feel like anybody who's saying
like I'm so big and I'm so great, they're not.
They're not. Have you ever had a guy I tell
you ahead of time like I'm really good and bad
or I have a really big dick and then and
then it turns out that they don't and they're not. No,
I've never had anybody flex and then like fall completely flat.
Speaker 4 (08:55):
No, but I've had a guy that was like very big,
and I thought I was going to see something very
big and oh no, oh yeah, yeah, it's.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
I'm surprised because I know there are guys out there
that talk a big game. You know, I'm gonna put
it down, I'm gonna whatever whatever, And like I feel
like if you're saying that, you probably aren't.
Speaker 4 (09:14):
Maybe in sexting, like they'll say like what they're gonna do.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
But I've never had anyone be like my.
Speaker 4 (09:18):
Dick's so big, Like, wait till you see it, you know,
because that I'll see it and I'll know.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Yeah. I think we're talking about this before on the tangent.
But the other thing I'll never understand it is guys
who are trying to get your attention who send a
picture of their dick, like if you especially if you've
never seen it, because my thing is like, first of all,
you ever met a woman? And then second of all, like,
and people will disagree with me on this, but for
(09:45):
the most part, they're not good looking.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
I see, I like a dick pick. I'm so sorry,
but that's what I like.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
Have you ever just been sitting on your couch, you know,
eating cheese, cheetos or cheese it's or whatever, yeah, and
some form of cheese chips and the guys like, I
want to come over whatever, and you're like, I don't know,
And then he sends a picture of his dick and
you're like, I'm on my feet brushing my teeth. I'll
be right there. I don't think I've ever heard of
that happening. The picture itself, I don't think so that's
(10:11):
I don't think that's how you guys have the architecture
of your brains works. You've done that, You've seen a
Dick pict and been like, I'll be right there.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
Well, I'm always ready to go. It's really rare that
I'm not horny.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
I just I've talked to I've never in my life
sent one. I've never sent a Dick pic ever. And
I know it's like Star Wars. I'm just never going
to do it one because I'm not going out like that.
Like I'm just not going out like that.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
But no one could know if like prove it was yours.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
I don't know. And it's not even that I'm ashamed
of it. I just I don't. And the other thing
is I don't think they're good looking. And the third
thing is to the point I just made, I've never
talked to a woman who is unless she really liked me.
But even then, who is, like looking at a picture
of your penis is really going to do it for me?
Speaker 3 (10:56):
It's like, I mean, after the woman has sent you whatever, like.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
No, I accept it, I don't. I don't provide. And
I but I say that from the beginning, Like it's
not like I say, I'll said you want and then
I'll say from the very start, you'll never get one
from me. I still get them because you guys are hot.
Women are fun to look at. You guys have great
looking parts. We don't.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Thanks.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
I think some people think that the vagina isn't that
great looking either.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
I mean I aren't. I've seen really like like pristine,
like almost dull, like it's like it almost it almost
looks like it's not there. It's like a slie. It's
like just this. And then I've seen some that are
just like yeah, and you know what, don't judge, don't judge,
don't discriminate. I was waiting for someone to say that,
(11:44):
but you know what, I would be an asshole to
say anything about it or to think anything about it,
because what are you gonna do. That's just who you are.
And it's all good. It works, it certainly.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Does, snowflakes all different, it's all good.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
I just I guess I've never met a woman except
for Kailin, and we've never dated. But I never met
a woman who's like, man, if I'm on the fence
and you send me a picture of that hammer, I
am on my way.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
No, you need to make sure the girl likes you
before you do that.
Speaker 4 (12:10):
Like, I don't want a strange dpic after this comes
out with.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
A number of dudes that hail Mary Dick pics. I
hear about it all the time my friends on the
dating apps. It'll be like, out of nowhere, here's a
Dick pic. I've never even met you.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Yeah, I said one time, I like gray sweatpants on
this show.
Speaker 3 (12:24):
And what do you think I got in my d
MS all day?
Speaker 1 (12:26):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Right, I know, And it's j Nu y R.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
Brown. If you want to.
Speaker 5 (12:31):
Send them to me, yeah, yeah, I want to showans.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Yes, thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
So there you guys go. There was the fun fact
that I couldn't really share eight thousand nerve endings. And
the clitoris the glitterists. Is that a funny word?
Speaker 4 (12:45):
That would be a beautiful name. It's just funny to
hear you say clitterists.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
I don't know why.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
I mean, Jason and I are like.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Yeah, eighteen different parts I think it was. That's that's
very complicated.
Speaker 3 (12:55):
It's way more sensitive. And you guys are always like
my dig my Dick like no.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
And you would think if there were eighteen pursuit in
eight thousand nerve endings, you would think that would be
a little easier to locate than it actually is.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Oh, it's easy to locate.
Speaker 4 (13:06):
It's what you do from there that, like I think
is the issue.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
I will also say a tip or at least in
my experience, is if you guys know what's up, Like,
if you guys know how to get there and what
you like and what feels good, it's helpful. And I
know that you don't want to be like instructing people,
but it's helpful for that guidance. And dudes better be
paying attention so that you don't have to do it
every time. But like if you know, if you know
(13:32):
what does it for you, because you know, some people
they want it more aggressive, some people want it like
barely touch it. You know, It's like it's everyone's different.
So like, if the objective is to help me as
your partner, get you there, then throw me a bone
or I'll throw you the bone later. But you know
what I'm saying, throw me, like you know, give me
and I get it. Nobody wants to be teaching somebody
(13:53):
how to have sex. But like you also have to
understand that if I hook up with ten women, there
are ten different ways to get there. Press Yeah, I
have had sex with ten women in my entire life
at age forty three.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
Do you ever instruct ladies?
Speaker 1 (14:08):
Yeah, I'll say something. I'll say so if what you're
doing is not going to work, I'll redirect in a
nice way.
Speaker 3 (14:14):
Yeah, I mean I try to create like a safe space.
Speaker 4 (14:16):
So like I'll be like, does that feel good in
like a hot way? Like I think it's if you
like are both open to doing that, then it doesn't
have to be embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Right, you know, I agree. I agree to keep it up.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
I think we should.
Speaker 6 (14:27):
More people should do this. More people should take this advice.
Let's instruct each other. We have stuff to do. I
don't have, right they wrap this up? Yeah, you to
shut the fuck up though.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
I don't want Yeah that's for the fake moaning, don't
I know?
Speaker 4 (14:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (14:43):
No, don't fake like I'm going it on that.
Speaker 6 (14:46):
Don't fake me out, bro, Like, tell me what left right,
because I got ship to do.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
Like it before you stick it Like I'm a dip show, okay,
like on a I am a pleaser. I want you
to come. My identity is tied to it, like I
actually and I know this sounds like a line, but
if you know me, then you know it's true. I
want you to get off more than I want to
get off, honestly, because I just I want you walking
around king dangling over here, gets it done every time
(15:19):
or as many times as it's possible. I really truly,
absolutely need that. And you can say that I would
even argue I'm selfish for how badly I need you
to be happy. So please don't tell me that I'm
doing something good in any form if you don't actually
like it, because I'm a dipshit and I'm gonna gonna
(15:39):
do it more, and I'm gonna do it every time.
I'm gonna go right there, I'm gonna go right I'm
gonna do exactly the same way because I thought you
liked it.
Speaker 4 (15:47):
It's also hot, like if you're sexting about it to
do the instructions.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Then yes, so a good tip pro tip, yeah tip
from kailin Like.
Speaker 4 (15:54):
That's kind of what how sometimes you can give a
little direction and be like I want you to do this,
this or this, and then the next time they'll try this,
this and this.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Maybe I'll go buy that book and we can have
it here like in our library.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
As reference to read a passage every change.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
Yeah, maybe I will, or maybe I'll read some passages
for you all at the Tangent Live. Yes, which, by
the way, I guess I can promote that here if
you're listening to the Tangent and if you're in the
Chicago Land area or if you'd like to come to
the Chicago Land area. Yeah, and if you're not from Chicago,
then you should realize that we have really bitten off
a big one with this. Joe's Live in Rosemond. Joe's
(16:28):
a legendary venue. Of course, Joe's on Weed Joe's and Rosemond.
A thousand people can get in this thing. We had
a thousand people come to the last one and we
expected literally we expected what one hundred and fifty two
hundred people, and a thousand people showed up. So now
we went out and got ourselves a thousand person venue
and we might be fucked actually, because now I'm actually
(16:48):
sweating from my under arms thinking about it. It makes
me very nervous. We'll be fine, and I'm not. You
would think like it's from my childhood or something. I
never had the birthday party nobody went to. It was
nothing like that. I just like, I don't no, it's
just it's scary. I don't know how to convey this
without sounding lame, but it's like, as as successful as
(17:09):
this show is, and I know that it is, and
I'm because of everybody in this room and everybody who listens,
and I'm super grateful. I'm still amazed, honestly, genuinely amazed
that anybody gives a shit about anything we do or say.
I really am, Like, what makes us special? Probably nothing,
I don't know, but it's just I just the last tangent,
I could not believe my eyes, Like I really couldn't
(17:29):
believe there were that many people there. And so here
we go with it. And now we have a real venue,
like a real, real famous place where famous people owned
by a famous guy ed. This guy Joe's ed so famous.
I mean, if we do more than seventy five, I
think we're good. Seventy five people, Yeah, yeah, okay, wow,
(17:51):
fuck I hope it's more than that. Shit, I can
name you seventy five people. Friends, like, let me just
go through my tender real quick. Honestly, it's free, by
the way, we have to pay for it, but it's
on June first, at seven thirty. It is free. You
can reserve a seat, though there aren't that many one
O three five kissfm dot com if you want to
(18:11):
reserve a seat. But whether you're in Chicago or you
want to come to Chicago and check out the Tangent Live,
it's happening on June first, which is less than thirty
days away, and I'm shitting myself. The boys the boy
Man Night will be there, Dejaynerotic will be there. It's
a whole night, you know, with other other interesting, entertaining things.
If you're you have to sit through forty five minutes
of us, but then we get to the other stuff.
(18:32):
So it's fine. But we're very excited about it, and
we're very grateful to anybody who would come, and it
would be so much fun to meet everybody. But but
we we we we did our big one with this,
and uh, it just makes me nervous because because I don't,
I just don't assume anything, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 5 (18:49):
There's so many things you could do on a Saturday night,
and the fact that people want to come hang out with.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Us exactly weird to me. But I hope you do.
June first, one O three five kissfm dot com reserve
a seat while you still can't. That would make me
feel a lot better. By the way, if we sell
out the seating part of it, Like if we just
sell that out then I can then I'm like, all right,
we're gonna be okay. But I would also I would say,
just in case, plan on coming early, because well, we
(19:14):
did have an issue with the last one. People couldn't see,
they couldn't hear, they weren't enough, there were people in
line outside fucking crazy.
Speaker 5 (19:21):
And there's free parking. They do validate parking about paying
for that either, Oh.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
That's good because it was cold the last time, Yeah,
really cold a lot. It will not be cold this time.
There'll be plenty of alcohol for everybody, and we'll be
having plenty of alcohol before we go out there. Because
another thing enduring, another thing about me is this kind
of stuff makes me very nervous. This is the equivalent
of public speaking, and it couldn't be any more of
(19:46):
a favorable crowd because it's all people that like us.
But like, this doesn't make me nervous. Talking on the
radio live doesn't make me nervous because as far as
I'm concerned, I'm just talking to my buddies. I forget.
Sometimes people can hear this like I literally feel like
I'm just having a conversation, and then I'll be like,
oh ship, yeah right, everybody, shut the fun up. Peoples
(20:09):
over here, shut the fun up. But this is your
chance to ask any question. Oh yeah, yeah, we'll do.
We'll do a Q and a.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
Right, yes, yeah, go in the crowd, to go in
the crowded.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
With yeah, you get to be white, yes.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
Is it gonna be as dirty as last time?
Speaker 1 (20:26):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (20:26):
Yeah, all right, Well we have a few people that
can't come.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
Yeah, yeah, we did. We do. We have like a
banned list, don't we, So let's make sure we can
fill it first before we start people the right exactly.
We might need like seat fillers, so let's not ban
anybody yet, but then we'll start banning the suits one
by one.
Speaker 3 (20:45):
You don't need to show up.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
And if you don't like it, there's other things to
do in Rosemont. So you don't like it, then go
into yeah right. If you don't like it, go do
here by a flying in the funk.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Out of here.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Here's the tangent. Thanks for listening.
Has my tangent. Fun fact, just been eating away at you,
all of you guys, just like so excited to know,
are you like so excited? I hit the intro. Let's
do this. It's the tangent with the bread show giving
me all this we couldn't talk about on air. I
wish I could credit whoever sent this to me, and
I'm sorry that I can't, but thank you. You know
who you are. Somebody sent me an actual page that
(00:24):
they took out of, they took a picture of from
the book She Comes First. And I guess these are
a bunch of tips for men and women or whomever
is attempting to navigate the female body, which I mean,
you may as well be Christopher Columbus out here like
an explorer, because it is. It can be something. It
(00:44):
can be treacherous, let me tell you. Oftentimes I point
the boat in one direction. I don't know where I'm going.
I don't I don't know where I'm going to wind up.
I'm just I'm just trying to hit land. That's it.
I'm just trying to find the buried treasure. That's it.
That's all I'm trying. Yes, where is the booty? However,
she for some reason wanted me to share this in
(01:04):
fun fact, and I really couldn't on the air because
it gets a little bit specific. But this might blow
you all away. Don't mistake her subject for an object,
namely the clitterists, with its eight thousand nerve endings oh yeah,
twice as many as the penis, and enviable ability to
(01:26):
produce multiple orgasms in a single session of sex, and
no known purpose other than pleasure. Is it any wonder
that sex therapists have proclaimed the clitterists a unique organ
in the total of humanity. It has over eighteen parts
to it. See this is the thing. Jason as a
(01:48):
gay man, but hear me out is a gay man.
Things are much simpler, aren't they.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
Yeah, there's I mean, there's multiple ways to do it.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
But I mean, but I mean, it's just it's motion
the no matter who I mean, Like a strong wind
hits me at the right angle and I'm good, Yes,
good for you. The same is not true for you, guys,
but not imagine the glitterist has over eighteen parts, both
visible and hidden, that participate in the production of pleasure.
(02:19):
I had eighteen parts, you guys. Contrary to conventional wisdom,
at least the kind that's common. The glitterist is much
more than a love button. It's a sophisticated network of
arousal that has more hotspots than a Layton volcano.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
It's not a button, right, you know what I always say.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
It's more than a button, Galen, it don't push on it.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
Like it's a button. I cannot fucking stand that.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
Okay, So for the men listening right now, ladies, because
you offer what would be your personal tips, I mean,
because again we're trying to help out mankind here. You
guys got eighteen parts down there, yeah, yes, in that
one area, yes, and eight thousand nerve endings. Okay, So
you would think it would be easy to find, but
(03:04):
it is indeed not always easy to find.
Speaker 4 (03:06):
My hope for men is just and this is even
just broader sense in life.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Learn how to read cues, because it's really that simple.
Speaker 4 (03:13):
You can tell if something feels good, and if it does,
keep doing that at that exact same speed speed.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (03:21):
Correct.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
If it's not.
Speaker 4 (03:22):
Getting the reaction, try something else. Try until you get
the reaction, and don't do it for a couple of
seconds and stop. You need to keep the exact same
speed when you're getting the reaction.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
The worst is as a man. Maybe this is true
for you guys when you're doing your thing down there,
But the worst is like if I'm really up in there, yeah,
if my face is buried, and if I if I
hit the spot but I can't breathe, The worst is
like if I hit the spot and I know that
what I'm doing is working, you die and I can't breathe.
I'm like, I'm going to fucking pass out doing this
(03:52):
because I do not want to stop because I finally
fucking found it.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
What a way to go right all on the field.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
Does that happen you guys know where you're like, oh, here,
this is it, and now I have to give it
up my all. Like I'm gonna have to go out
like this.
Speaker 4 (04:04):
Yeah, I mean I try to breathe through my nose,
but yeah, because.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
It can be hard to do that when your entire
face is Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
No, I mean it's it's they don't call it a
job for nothing.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
Yeah, I mean it's.
Speaker 3 (04:15):
Work that has.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
Never thought of it that way.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
But okay, correct, Yeah no, but I give it my all,
you know, But yeah, No, there are times where I
like I might die here, like I come up and
I'm like, oh my god, my eyes are.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
But yeah, well that's the other thing is like you're
not doing and I know these are supposed to be
your tips. I'm sorry, but I want your feedback on this.
You're not doing any service unless you unless you really
just want it over. You're not doing any service by
making us think that whatever we're doing is working now,
because the truth is I'm a pleaser. I want it
to work. I want you to get off.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
So I'm just gonna do that thing every single time. Yeah,
and I'm gonna keep doing it for the reasons that
you just explained. So unless you just want the dude
to be done and off of, you do not do
that to yourself because it's simply it's it's what is it,
Freudian Pavlovian, You're simply reinforcing bad behaviors. Yes, any thoughts,
(05:10):
just liack it before you stick it. That's just you
take that period.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
You just take that which period it before you start?
Speaker 1 (05:17):
Okay it comes first? Yeah, yeah, all chasing any tips
of the gay men out there or or women.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
It's so simple, Like we're just too simple, Like what
are the actually want.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
To teeth, I guess, like no teeth like an actually
touch my balls.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
I mean, yeah, you want to make some such balls.
Speaker 4 (05:37):
Don't get started on the balls because you don't like it.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
But a lot of some people.
Speaker 5 (05:42):
My I personally do not because I'm afraid they're going
to go up in me. And that's one of my.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Why why would your balls go up any Since.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
I heard that something that could happen?
Speaker 5 (05:50):
It's all I think about every day because I'm so
scared they jumping.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Most likely that your balls are to go inside of you, though,
is when you're cold. It has nothing to do with
anybody touching them because you're you know, you're If you've
noticed when you're cold, your testicles tightened, it's to hold
them closer to your body to warm them up, right,
But that's not going to happen from somebody touching them.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
It's all I think about.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
It really is.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
It really is so I can't survive. But it's just
it's easy.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
I mean, yeah, you want to make a little bit
of suction with your mouth, I mean you know, yeah,
you want to. I guess that's what a vagina probably
feels like if you do it right.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Yeah, I guess the other thing is like all the
all the throat noises, like is that is that real?
Or is that just you making me feel like you
can barely accommodate it.
Speaker 4 (06:37):
I have a small mouth a lot of times, and
it actually is real, you know, because.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
It's like, oh, I'm so big, Like right, that's what
I mean. You feel good though, But like here's the
thing is, you know me, I'm a thinker, So like
when I when that's going on, or when someone's like,
oh my god, you're so big, it's like shut up.
But my thing is my thing is like is that
is that what you're Is that just what you're like?
(07:03):
I don't know, Like if you were to ask me,
am I actually I don't know the answer because I
don't know if that's just what you guys say. Because
if you were to ask me like, is my stuff
you know whatever? If I like you and I'm and
I intend to keep using it, then then yes, the
answer is it's the fucking most amazing I've ever had.
Like what am I going to say to you, Like, eh,
it's I you know, Like, no, I'm not gonna say that.
(07:25):
I'm going to tell you that it's great. So I
guess what I mean is as a little bit of
an insecure person and an overthinker, I don't necessarily believe
all the compliments that you guys give because I just
figure that's what you tell everybody.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
I never lie, like my compliments are always true, Like
I wouldn't be like this is the biggest I've ever
seen if it's not. But I do, you know, like
to be a little more enthusiastic so that you feel good.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
No, And I think that's great. I just don't know.
I don't know whether to take that as you're actually
struggling with it or like you know or you're.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
It's not easy either way.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
So well, you know, like Kiki, you got to look
on your face like you want to say you have nothing,
you got something to say, you're just not saying it.
Speaker 6 (08:05):
No this with you, like, shut the fuck up if
it's not real. Like I don't want to hear all
the extra stuff, Okay, I say, yeah, that's why you humble.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Yeah every time.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
I don't mind a little talk talking.
Speaker 1 (08:17):
No, I like it. I just want to believe that
what you're telling me is real and not just trying
to make me feel good. Because it's like if that's
the case, then just I don't know, Well it's okay, yeah,
you know, yeah, I guess I'm not the best of
it or the biggest or whatever. Yeah, so I just
figure I'm not.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Just stop overthinking.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
It's just easier. It's easier for me just to figure
that i'm not, because I feel like anybody who's saying
like I'm so big and I'm so great, they're not.
They're not. Have you ever had a guy I tell
you ahead of time like I'm really good and bad
or I have a really big dick and then and
then it turns out that they don't and they're not. No,
I've never had anybody flex and then like fall completely flat.
Speaker 4 (08:55):
No, but I've had a guy that was like very big,
and I thought I was going to see something very
big and oh no, oh yeah, yeah, it's.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
I'm surprised because I know there are guys out there
that talk a big game. You know, I'm gonna put
it down, I'm gonna whatever whatever, And like I feel
like if you're saying that, you probably aren't.
Speaker 4 (09:14):
Maybe in sexting, like they'll say like what they're gonna do.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
But I've never had anyone be like my.
Speaker 4 (09:18):
Dick's so big, Like, wait till you see it, you know,
because that I'll see it and I'll know.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Yeah. I think we're talking about this before on the tangent.
But the other thing I'll never understand it is guys
who are trying to get your attention who send a
picture of their dick, like if you especially if you've
never seen it, because my thing is like, first of all,
you ever met a woman? And then second of all, like,
and people will disagree with me on this, but for
(09:45):
the most part, they're not good looking.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
I see, I like a dick pick. I'm so sorry,
but that's what I like.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
Have you ever just been sitting on your couch, you know,
eating cheese, cheetos or cheese it's or whatever, yeah, and
some form of cheese chips and the guys like, I
want to come over whatever, and you're like, I don't know,
And then he sends a picture of his dick and
you're like, I'm on my feet brushing my teeth. I'll
be right there. I don't think I've ever heard of
that happening. The picture itself, I don't think so that's
(10:11):
I don't think that's how you guys have the architecture
of your brains works. You've done that, You've seen a
Dick pict and been like, I'll be right there.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
Well, I'm always ready to go. It's really rare that
I'm not horny.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
I just I've talked to I've never in my life
sent one. I've never sent a Dick pic ever. And
I know it's like Star Wars. I'm just never going
to do it one because I'm not going out like that.
Like I'm just not going out like that.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
But no one could know if like prove it was yours.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
I don't know. And it's not even that I'm ashamed
of it. I just I don't. And the other thing
is I don't think they're good looking. And the third
thing is to the point I just made, I've never
talked to a woman who is unless she really liked me.
But even then, who is, like looking at a picture
of your penis is really going to do it for me?
Speaker 3 (10:56):
It's like, I mean, after the woman has sent you whatever, like.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
No, I accept it, I don't. I don't provide. And
I but I say that from the beginning, Like it's
not like I say, I'll said you want and then
I'll say from the very start, you'll never get one
from me. I still get them because you guys are hot.
Women are fun to look at. You guys have great
looking parts. We don't.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Thanks.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
I think some people think that the vagina isn't that
great looking either.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
I mean I aren't. I've seen really like like pristine,
like almost dull, like it's like it almost it almost
looks like it's not there. It's like a slie. It's
like just this. And then I've seen some that are
just like yeah, and you know what, don't judge, don't judge,
don't discriminate. I was waiting for someone to say that,
(11:44):
but you know what, I would be an asshole to
say anything about it or to think anything about it,
because what are you gonna do. That's just who you are.
And it's all good. It works, it certainly.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Does, snowflakes all different, it's all good.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
I just I guess I've never met a woman except
for Kailin, and we've never dated. But I never met
a woman who's like, man, if I'm on the fence
and you send me a picture of that hammer, I
am on my way.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
No, you need to make sure the girl likes you
before you do that.
Speaker 4 (12:10):
Like, I don't want a strange dpic after this comes
out with.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
A number of dudes that hail Mary Dick pics. I
hear about it all the time my friends on the
dating apps. It'll be like, out of nowhere, here's a
Dick pic. I've never even met you.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Yeah, I said one time, I like gray sweatpants on
this show.
Speaker 3 (12:24):
And what do you think I got in my d
MS all day?
Speaker 1 (12:26):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Right, I know, And it's j Nu y R.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
Brown. If you want to.
Speaker 5 (12:31):
Send them to me, yeah, yeah, I want to showans.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Yes, thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
So there you guys go. There was the fun fact
that I couldn't really share eight thousand nerve endings. And
the clitoris the glitterists. Is that a funny word?
Speaker 4 (12:45):
That would be a beautiful name. It's just funny to
hear you say clitterists.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
I don't know why.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
I mean, Jason and I are like.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Yeah, eighteen different parts I think it was. That's that's
very complicated.
Speaker 3 (12:55):
It's way more sensitive. And you guys are always like
my dig my Dick like no.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
And you would think if there were eighteen pursuit in
eight thousand nerve endings, you would think that would be
a little easier to locate than it actually is.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Oh, it's easy to locate.
Speaker 4 (13:06):
It's what you do from there that, like I think
is the issue.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
I will also say a tip or at least in
my experience, is if you guys know what's up, Like,
if you guys know how to get there and what
you like and what feels good, it's helpful. And I
know that you don't want to be like instructing people,
but it's helpful for that guidance. And dudes better be
paying attention so that you don't have to do it
every time. But like if you know, if you know
(13:32):
what does it for you, because you know, some people
they want it more aggressive, some people want it like
barely touch it. You know, It's like it's everyone's different.
So like, if the objective is to help me as
your partner, get you there, then throw me a bone
or I'll throw you the bone later. But you know
what I'm saying, throw me, like you know, give me
and I get it. Nobody wants to be teaching somebody
(13:53):
how to have sex. But like you also have to
understand that if I hook up with ten women, there
are ten different ways to get there. Press Yeah, I
have had sex with ten women in my entire life
at age forty three.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
Do you ever instruct ladies?
Speaker 1 (14:08):
Yeah, I'll say something. I'll say so if what you're
doing is not going to work, I'll redirect in a
nice way.
Speaker 3 (14:14):
Yeah, I mean I try to create like a safe space.
Speaker 4 (14:16):
So like I'll be like, does that feel good in
like a hot way? Like I think it's if you
like are both open to doing that, then it doesn't
have to be embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Right, you know, I agree. I agree to keep it up.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
I think we should.
Speaker 6 (14:27):
More people should do this. More people should take this advice.
Let's instruct each other. We have stuff to do. I
don't have, right they wrap this up? Yeah, you to
shut the fuck up though.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
I don't want Yeah that's for the fake moaning, don't
I know?
Speaker 4 (14:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (14:43):
No, don't fake like I'm going it on that.
Speaker 6 (14:46):
Don't fake me out, bro, Like, tell me what left right,
because I got ship to do.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
Like it before you stick it Like I'm a dip show, okay,
like on a I am a pleaser. I want you
to come. My identity is tied to it, like I
actually and I know this sounds like a line, but
if you know me, then you know it's true. I
want you to get off more than I want to
get off, honestly, because I just I want you walking
around king dangling over here, gets it done every time
(15:19):
or as many times as it's possible. I really truly,
absolutely need that. And you can say that I would
even argue I'm selfish for how badly I need you
to be happy. So please don't tell me that I'm
doing something good in any form if you don't actually
like it, because I'm a dipshit and I'm gonna gonna
(15:39):
do it more, and I'm gonna do it every time.
I'm gonna go right there, I'm gonna go right I'm
gonna do exactly the same way because I thought you
liked it.
Speaker 4 (15:47):
It's also hot, like if you're sexting about it to
do the instructions.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Then yes, so a good tip pro tip, yeah tip
from kailin Like.
Speaker 4 (15:54):
That's kind of what how sometimes you can give a
little direction and be like I want you to do this,
this or this, and then the next time they'll try this,
this and this.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Maybe I'll go buy that book and we can have
it here like in our library.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
As reference to read a passage every change.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
Yeah, maybe I will, or maybe I'll read some passages
for you all at the Tangent Live. Yes, which, by
the way, I guess I can promote that here if
you're listening to the Tangent and if you're in the
Chicago Land area or if you'd like to come to
the Chicago Land area. Yeah, and if you're not from Chicago,
then you should realize that we have really bitten off
a big one with this. Joe's Live in Rosemond. Joe's
(16:28):
a legendary venue. Of course, Joe's on Weed Joe's and Rosemond.
A thousand people can get in this thing. We had
a thousand people come to the last one and we
expected literally we expected what one hundred and fifty two
hundred people, and a thousand people showed up. So now
we went out and got ourselves a thousand person venue
and we might be fucked actually, because now I'm actually
(16:48):
sweating from my under arms thinking about it. It makes
me very nervous. We'll be fine, and I'm not. You
would think like it's from my childhood or something. I
never had the birthday party nobody went to. It was
nothing like that. I just like, I don't no, it's
just it's scary. I don't know how to convey this
without sounding lame, but it's like, as as successful as
(17:09):
this show is, and I know that it is, and
I'm because of everybody in this room and everybody who listens,
and I'm super grateful. I'm still amazed, honestly, genuinely amazed
that anybody gives a shit about anything we do or say.
I really am, Like, what makes us special? Probably nothing,
I don't know, but it's just I just the last tangent,
I could not believe my eyes, Like I really couldn't
(17:29):
believe there were that many people there. And so here
we go with it. And now we have a real venue,
like a real, real famous place where famous people owned
by a famous guy ed. This guy Joe's ed so famous.
I mean, if we do more than seventy five, I
think we're good. Seventy five people, Yeah, yeah, okay, wow,
(17:51):
fuck I hope it's more than that. Shit, I can
name you seventy five people. Friends, like, let me just
go through my tender real quick. Honestly, it's free, by
the way, we have to pay for it, but it's
on June first, at seven thirty. It is free. You
can reserve a seat, though there aren't that many one
O three five kissfm dot com if you want to
(18:11):
reserve a seat. But whether you're in Chicago or you
want to come to Chicago and check out the Tangent Live,
it's happening on June first, which is less than thirty
days away, and I'm shitting myself. The boys the boy
Man Night will be there, Dejaynerotic will be there. It's
a whole night, you know, with other other interesting, entertaining things.
If you're you have to sit through forty five minutes
of us, but then we get to the other stuff.
(18:32):
So it's fine. But we're very excited about it, and
we're very grateful to anybody who would come, and it
would be so much fun to meet everybody. But but
we we we we did our big one with this,
and uh, it just makes me nervous because because I don't,
I just don't assume anything, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 5 (18:49):
There's so many things you could do on a Saturday night,
and the fact that people want to come hang out with.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Us exactly weird to me. But I hope you do.
June first, one O three five kissfm dot com reserve
a seat while you still can't. That would make me
feel a lot better. By the way, if we sell
out the seating part of it, Like if we just
sell that out then I can then I'm like, all right,
we're gonna be okay. But I would also I would say,
just in case, plan on coming early, because well, we
(19:14):
did have an issue with the last one. People couldn't see,
they couldn't hear, they weren't enough, there were people in
line outside fucking crazy.
Speaker 5 (19:21):
And there's free parking. They do validate parking about paying
for that either, Oh.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
That's good because it was cold the last time, Yeah,
really cold a lot. It will not be cold this time.
There'll be plenty of alcohol for everybody, and we'll be
having plenty of alcohol before we go out there. Because
another thing enduring, another thing about me is this kind
of stuff makes me very nervous. This is the equivalent
of public speaking, and it couldn't be any more of
(19:46):
a favorable crowd because it's all people that like us.
But like, this doesn't make me nervous. Talking on the
radio live doesn't make me nervous because as far as
I'm concerned, I'm just talking to my buddies. I forget.
Sometimes people can hear this like I literally feel like
I'm just having a conversation, and then I'll be like,
oh ship, yeah right, everybody, shut the fun up. Peoples
(20:09):
over here, shut the fun up. But this is your
chance to ask any question. Oh yeah, yeah, we'll do.
We'll do a Q and a.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
Right, yes, yeah, go in the crowd, to go in
the crowded.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
With yeah, you get to be white, yes.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
Is it gonna be as dirty as last time?
Speaker 1 (20:26):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (20:26):
Yeah, all right, Well we have a few people that
can't come.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
Yeah, yeah, we did. We do. We have like a
banned list, don't we, So let's make sure we can
fill it first before we start people the right exactly.
We might need like seat fillers, so let's not ban
anybody yet, but then we'll start banning the suits one
by one.
Speaker 3 (20:45):
You don't need to show up.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
And if you don't like it, there's other things to
do in Rosemont. So you don't like it, then go
into yeah right. If you don't like it, go do
here by a flying in the funk.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Out of here.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Here's the tangent. Thanks for listening.
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