Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Diane, I'll go to you.When Marley was younger and you guys would
like go out to eat or something, would she would she get like Shirley
Temple's what what was the other bigkids drink? It was Shirley Temples?
And was it was it Roy Rogers? Rob Roy's not Rob rob Roy is
like a real drink? Right,Roy Rogers, isn't it? I don't
(00:22):
like my kids would get them whenthey were younger. The Shirley Temples.
Shirley Temple is grenadine and is itsprite or sometimes gingerrell? But yes,
right, it says Rore Rodgers isbasically grenadine and coke coke? Right,
yea, So it's the it's thedark liquor. Are you serious? Is
that good? I bet it is. It's a cherry coke. Yeah,
(00:43):
I mean that's really all that itis. Have you had that one,
Kristen, because the other day sheasked me what a Shirley Temple was?
You've never had a Shirley Temple?Are you serious? As an adult?
They're not that good? Because youalso know I can get a real drink,
No, but you have a dirtyShirley. So you get some vodkas
it I've never heard that, You'venever heard of it? No, that
(01:03):
sounds gross. Why do I wantvodka? Sprite and grenadine? I think
it sounds good. How about JackDaniels That sounds much better. But anyway,
you know what I was did yourkids well no, no, no,
no, zero chance. Were theyallowed to have anything like like like
(01:26):
a fancy flavored water the No,no no, But like if you would,
like if you guys went out fordinner, were they allowed to get
like something fancy? Always did havewater and you must finish three glasses Friday
here and there. They've had sprite, but well you could get sprite with
grenadine, nothing mixed. No,no, wait, so they've never even
(01:52):
gone to like a fountain drink andgotten like like just yeah, like there's
the million choices and just start mixingeverything together. I would have yelled at
them across the restaurant. No.But anyway, so are you ready for
this? This is what I wasreading, and it's genius, and I
(02:13):
hope, I hope restaurants did iton purpose. But I guess the days
of like kids getting like Shirley Temple'sor or Roy Rogers done done mocktails,
like a fancy sort of fruity likewhatever whatever it's on the menu, right,
(02:36):
every I can't say every restaurant,and essentially every restaurant now has mocktails,
right, Yeah. And so they'llgo in there and mom and dad
will order whatever whatever drink they're getting, and the kids get a mocktail.
So you're saying because you hate mocktails. Yes, you're saying that, let
they let this be part of thekids menu instead of for the adults.
(03:00):
It's genius, Yes, but yeah, no, I would never order a
mocktail. I can't think of whatwould be wrong in the universe that I
ordered from the mocktail menu. Yeah. And I can speak from experience and
tell you if you're ever dining withhim, I think you'd like a mocktail.
(03:21):
You are going to be mocked ruthlessly. Yeah. Yeah, you know
what, get iced tea much easier. It was bad, Diane. He
would not shut up the whole meal. He just kept saying, I can't
believe you're drinking that. It's horrible, Like, what are you getting?
One of the brunch places we wentwhen we were in yes, Charleston,
we were in Charleston and you andKristen got mocktail. Yeah, it was
(03:44):
like some sort of just you know, I remember the hand signal that I
did. I do too. Itwould have take gave you the old Hartley
something different to try. It waslike laughing, try iced tea. Yeah,
Christen said, didn't the three ofus get mocked tails? And then
somebody got a beer? I didnot get a mocktail. No, maybe
(04:06):
zero chance, zero chance I gota mocktail. Drink coffee if you're not
going to drink liquor. The Yeah, there's a headline in the Onion yesterday
that was like eighteen dollars mocktail satisfiescraving to waste money. No, it's
true. No, that's the otherthing. Mocktails are so goddamn expensive.
But but parents are going out toeat and they'll go like, okay,
(04:30):
you know what, let's you know, when the when the when the waitress
comes by and says, you know, can I start anybody off with a
drink? The parents will get youknow, like glass wine or a cocktail
or martini or whatever, and thekids will order a mocktail. Wouldn't it
be weird if the waiters say it'svery odd? Yeah, if they've got
it's it's painful enough to have akid order because they don't speak up loud
(04:51):
enough. Oh no, we madeour kids order they don't. Yeah,
and I do too, but itat first takes a few times before they
get comfortable with it. But thenif how ridiculous would it sound if they
have the bar menu, Let meget at the uh, let me get
the the the bombay ginger breeze please. Some waiters and waitresses will say,
(05:15):
it's very awkward to have a likean eight year old get a mocktail,
right, But it's fine, there'snothing wrong with it. Yeah, he
loves the pineapple grapefruit yu Zoo.But there is no there is no there's
no liquor in it. So it'stotally fine. Now here's my other favorite
part. So that's younger kids,older kids, teenagers. Yeah, you
(05:42):
know what they're doing. What they'regoing for a happy hour for mocktails.
Yes, they'll go like they seetheir parents do it. Right, Hey,
let's all go to happy hour.Let's go to Coastguard Kurtz House and
have happy hour. So they'll allgo out to some place for happy hour
and they go get they'll go outto dinner and go get drinks minus their
(06:03):
parents. So they're paying. Yes, that's expensive, Yes, but it's
Friday. We're going for a happyhour. I've had a rough week at
school, Yes, I have,actually, and they go for a happy
hour. Isn't that awesome? Theheadline for this story isn't that great?
Come on, kids, let's grabdrinks. But it's the same thing they
(06:23):
said that starts with when they're younger, they go out with their parents and
they'll be like Friday, let's goearly, Like hey, let's go to
happy hour by the way, Likelike like think of every brewery or something
where where there's kids, parents willgo for a happy hour. So it
be like, oh, we're goingto the brewery. Yeah, mom and
dad are going for a happy hour. We're meeting up with the Willis's,
(06:44):
the Joneses, and the Clarks andhere we go. So the kids are
going for happy hour. Well,now I'm sixteen, let's all get in
Paul's card. We're going to happyhour. They said you could walk the
halls at schools and here all theteenage kids going like, oh, yeah,
it's Friday, we're going to That'sawesome. Like a my day,
we'd drink out of a keg anda feel. Isn't that great? Isn't
(07:08):
that great? Now? You saidyou hope restaurants did this on purpose.
I hope they're now doing it onpurpose because then it gets them to be
a customer for life. Well,a couple of things. Number One,
it's it makes money for the restaurant. Number two, customer for life.
I've been going to happy hour heresince I was fifteen. I love the
(07:30):
idea of the parents. And bythe way, like, I would never
drink mocktails, however, and Idon't know if this makes me a bad
parent or not, but I coulddefinitely see myself if the boys were still
at home grab it Jack on Fridayand going, hey, we're going to
happy hour, Come on, boys, here we go. Although I don't
(07:51):
know that I would get them likenon alcoholic beers, well I know I
never did, but I'd let themget a mocktail. Oh, now,
do some mocktails use zero proof booze? I don't care. I don't know.
Just for the taste, Yeah,what do I care? Well,
that's a whole I think feel likethat's another level. No, it's not.
That's fine. Zero proof booze.I gotta be honest. I'm being
(08:16):
completely honest. I didn't know theydid that. We've talked about that,
that they'll put zero proof, likelike a still zero proof whatever they want
to use beer, So you couldhave a non alcoholic beer in a mocktail.
Oh yeah, then I'm okay withthat. Would you let them order
just an oduleS? No, No, that's embarrassing. That is embarrassing your
(08:41):
mocktail over and a that's the mocktail? Yeah, no, no beer.
But what if it is a mocktailthat features like, say, say,
what's the uh uh the Guinness andchampagne? What is that called Guinness and
champagne? Yeah? What is thatblack velvet? Would you let your son
(09:03):
order a black velvet with the zeropercent Guinness and non alcoholic champagne? Would
I let Yeah, yeah, that'dbe totally fine. But if he ordered
the zero Guinness, No, no, I don't want I don't want him
ordering non alcoholic beer as beer everthe no. Yeah, it's just like
(09:26):
I don't want the trusting but Zin'sare fine. The yeah. I mean
I live in that world too too. It's actually a very consistent argument for
you did through his hockey bag,gloves, pads, and zins. What
about so Bill just posted on nextby the way, do you realize when
does Marley get home end of themonth. She still has a few weeks
(09:50):
left because of quarters. Yeah,my kid'll be home on Sunday. I
haven't seen him in four months.Maybe that's why I'm busting out of my
skin today. Is that right?I suppose you popped down there once.
Yeah, didn't you go see himplay hockey somewhere? That was in January?
It was wow. Yeah, Ihaven't seen him in four months.
As long as I've gone my entirelife without seeing him, that's the reality
(10:11):
a lot of Yeah no first timecollege parents. Yeah yeah, face sucks.
Yeah No, I can't wait forhim to get Home'm gonna welcome him
home with a black velvet and hisin Oh, that'll be in the entire
car ride home. He'll be onZen's. Bill wants to know if you
were ever fine with like the pinacoladas or the frozen dakeries virgin frozen dakyries,
if I'm okay with them? ForOh, they definitely had those because
(10:35):
those popped up a menu. Yeahthat that would be fine. Yeah,
like a virgin. I made himcall him that, but yeah, like
a Virgin Penia Colada Colada, Heya Klada, Well I got Boston calling
on the brain. Yeah, no, they love I love that song she
does with Lil Nas x Camilla Coladathe No No No. But yeah,
(10:56):
they've had Virgin dakeries or Virgin PinaColade. But yeah, I would let
him get like na liquor in amocktail, but just not straight away.
No, Like I would never letthem order a virgin vodka tonic. It
would probably have is there? You'reright, it is odds saying virgin.
(11:18):
Is there a new age way ofdescribing these like some woke way? Yeah,
give me a woke Colada? Idon't know. Is it the zero
alcohol drink or something alike? Youcan't say virgin. Jesus Christ John writes
when I go out to dinner andwe do get drinks, I let my
(11:41):
son, who is seventeen, justtake SIPs of mixed alcohol drinks. There
you go, all right, that'sfine, But he's not letting him get
mocktails. Just be cool. Butdoes does his kid and his buddies go
out for a happy hour and getmocktails and how weird does that? Forget
the servers, they may see itas an emerging trend. If you don't
know about this and you're at therestaurant. Also, oh and you're here,
(12:03):
I wonder what the hell is goingon at that table? And it
came out for a happy hour?Same thing you guys are doing. Hey
that high tops getting crazy? Seriously, you thought you hate it's in the
car seats at breweries they got teenagersin. But here's bar and grills.
But here's where. But but here'sthe beauty of the mocktail. It grows
with you so at at at youknow when when you can finally try the
(12:28):
real one, when you're sure,when you're surely temple age. You're getting
a mocktail because you're going out todinner with your parents. As you start
to get into early teens and stuff. When your when your parents go out
for happy hour, you're going outfor a happy hour with them. And
then when you're old enough just togo out with your friends, you're going
out for a happy hour. Sofor the business, this is genius.
(12:54):
I think this is what if yourson, well middle school, was like,
hey, we're having a sleepover atTeddy's house. You're like, what
are you guys doing? Well,first we're going to happy hour and then
we're gonna go play video games.Yeah, I would find that strange,
but that would be awesome because allhe's getting is mocktails. I'm guessing you
(13:18):
wouldn't be cool with him getting zeroproof vodka. No, I would not.
But this is where Applebee's, it'sworse than soda, needs to lean
into this buzzy new dollars. Well, they're bringing back dollar ritas, but
there's no profit charge families with kids. Ten bucks for a mocktail, right
(13:45):
dollar readers for the parents, twodollar riders for the kids. That's genius.
That's really smart. By the way, one other question, Yes,
can you buy kegs of n Abeer? You can think so? Why
not? I wouldn't more kids havinglike house parties with n A beer like
(14:09):
like middle school? No, theydon't like the taste of beer a middle
schooler, did you really like thetaste of beer when you started drinking beer?
I know two boys that did.Okay, much like the guy who
wrote in I was drinking. Iwas drinking for the purpose. I wasn't
(14:30):
drinking for the taste. Oh,they definitely drink for the purpose now absolutely.
Line two. Hi elliot in themorning. Yeah, Hi, who's
this? Hey? Yes, sorry, this is Tim. I'm from Maryland.
I actually sell liquor. Yes,they call it spiritless. They call
it spiritless spiritless spiritless happy Hour.By the way, I'm totally doing that.
(14:52):
You know, you know what Ineed. I'm opening. I'm opening
a bar near high schools. Spiritlesshappy hour three point thirty five, happy
hour four to six. That's geniusat my future. Four oh one case,
Thank you, awesome, thank you, my friend, thank you.
(15:13):
What what menu were you on?I'm trying to see. Oh, I
think that's what I had. Ihad, Oh, I had turmeric,
carrot, orange, pineapple, mangolime with ginger beer. Where was this?
This is when you made fun ofme. Oh that's right. And
(15:33):
it was served, you know howlike sometimes you get like on a bloody
Mary, you get like the stemand it has everything on it. Yeah,
and that came with a tampon.I think they even said to me,
if you desire, you can addgin. And I said, oh
no, no, no, please, are you are you kidding? Trying
to think straight? I got it'sI don't want to get a UTA.
(16:00):
What if I have to take atest. The other choice was grapefruit lime,
lemon simple syrup, rosemary lemon limesoda with with the gin option as
well with a Those are the shots, A shot of nitro cold brew.
(16:26):
Hi Elliott in the morning. Yeah, Hi, who's this? I'm Jordan's.
When my family would go to OceanCity and I'm one of the youngest
of the kids in I was aroundfive and I was I asked my dad
if I could get a strawberry Dapperbecause they're basically strawberry s moodie. I
(16:48):
was afraid to ask, so heasked for me. He told them that
it was for me. But Iguess there's too busy and it was not
virgins. Oh that happens, mistake, She'll be fine. Yeah, So
I passed. I passed out onone of my aunts, and so we
think it was because I was drunk. Probably probably, Hey, but let
me ask you, how old areyou now? How old are you now?
(17:11):
Twenty three? The you don't,well, maybe you do. Do
you have kids now? No?No? The but like, back up,
back up, when you were likesixteen or seventeen, wouldn't it be
cool to like, just grab allyour girlfriends and go for a happy hour.
Oh no, I couldn't even looklike I passed for twenty one now,
(17:32):
so there's no way I was gettingin. Then you got to go
spirit lists. You got to gofor the spirit list happy hour, which
I know sucks, but you're stillgoing out and enjoying the happy hour passing.
Yes, I'm telling you, andstumble my mistake. I don't even
know. Thank you, ma'am.I don't even know how mocktails became popular.
I think it's this sort of sobercurious movement. Yeah no, yeah,
(18:04):
I'm curious, what are you doing? I'm curious to get a buzz.
Were there some bars that are completelyfree of alcohol? I know,
I see the signs out front saysout of business. Stop it. Some
are very popular, not my house. Hi, hell yet the morning?
(18:27):
Hey, Good morningbody? How areyou? Hey? I'm doing great?
How are you? I'm good.So a couple of years back, this
is pretty pandemic, so like awhole life time ago, I worked as
a waiter in a pretty upscare restaurantdowntown and they had a pretty strong bar
menu. They made it so thateven families came in they wanted the kids
(18:48):
to be just as excited about thebar program as the adults were. So
read about nine mocktails available, anda lot of them had like the same
table service that the cocktails had.So think about like the snow that you
would do table side, or thecool receptacles that would pour in. And
one of the gin and tonics hadthis big gin infuser that you would put
like flowers and such in. Well, one of the mocktails also had a
(19:11):
very similar receptacle that you would pourtable side for the kids. And I
remember this drink runner. In oneof his first weeks, a kid ordered
some fancy smanty drink and table sidehe poured in about an ounce and a
half of gin into his mocktail.Parents didn't know, the kid didn't know.
Next to you know, the kidsstarted laughing, and every good time
(19:33):
he orders a second mocktail wow drinkwhen it was the exact same thing.
And it wasn't until about halfway throughthe second drink that the parents realized something
was up, and they tasted hiscocktail and sure enough kid was drunk off
his ass. Hey, what isthe what is the passed? Hey?
What is the what is the whatis the burden? And the parents were
(19:56):
actually they were okay with the parentswere fun with it. They thought it
was hilarious. Oh sweet, Whatis it? What is the what?
Thank you sir? What is whatis the bourbon drink? I don't drink
them, but is it a Manhattanthat like everybody does, like a smoked
Manhattan now or an old fashion,old fashion, a smoky old fashion.
You imagine some eight year old kidgetting one of those, I'd laugh my
(20:18):
ass off, like twenty dollars.No. He brings up a good point
though, And I've had a coupleof calls like this. How do you
if you have a no booze?If you choose section of the menu so
there is the option to add gin, there's always fun rhymes to it,
what do you do to indicate tothe server as the bartender, this is
(20:40):
the virbon one doesn't have alcohol.I don't know the answer to that.
I really don't. That could bea dangerous game. I mean if you
went out, if you went outfor for you took the kids, you
were going out for a happy hour, right or you were going out for
a fancy dinner and we were youknow what, let's get around the cocktails
and mom and dad get old fashions, but you want to virgin old fash
(21:00):
I don't know is there is there? Is there? I don't drink them,
but is there is there something inan old fashioned like is there like
a cherry or or something in therewhere you could put like two for the
adult? Twice more obvious than that? Why? Because if it's a darker
drink like you're not going to seethe components inside, well, you know
(21:23):
what taste them? Did you nothear the list of things that were in
my U? Yours was easy totell though, because I had a big
string hanging down the outside of theglass. And to Eric, who thought
it was funny that I to sayI didn't have the gin because we were
putting out our summer pillows tonight,I will let you know. And Elliott
(21:45):
recalls this as well. I'm sureit was Halloween weekend. It was fall
Diane, I'll go to you.When Marley was younger and you guys would
like go out to eat or something, would she would she get like Shirley
Temple's what what was the other bigkids drink? It was Shirley Temples?
And was it was it Roy Rogers? Rob Roy's not Rob rob Roy is
like a real drink? Right,Roy Rogers, isn't it? I don't
(00:22):
like my kids would get them whenthey were younger. The Shirley Temples.
Shirley Temple is grenadine and is itsprite or sometimes gingerrell? But yes,
right, it says Rore Rodgers isbasically grenadine and coke coke? Right,
yea, So it's the it's thedark liquor. Are you serious? Is
that good? I bet it is. It's a cherry coke. Yeah,
(00:43):
I mean that's really all that itis. Have you had that one,
Kristen, because the other day sheasked me what a Shirley Temple was?
You've never had a Shirley Temple?Are you serious? As an adult?
They're not that good? Because youalso know I can get a real drink,
No, but you have a dirtyShirley. So you get some vodkas
it I've never heard that, You'venever heard of it? No, that
(01:03):
sounds gross. Why do I wantvodka? Sprite and grenadine? I think
it sounds good. How about JackDaniels That sounds much better. But anyway,
you know what I was did yourkids well no, no, no,
no, zero chance. Were theyallowed to have anything like like like
(01:26):
a fancy flavored water the No,no no, But like if you would,
like if you guys went out fordinner, were they allowed to get
like something fancy? Always did havewater and you must finish three glasses Friday
here and there. They've had sprite, but well you could get sprite with
grenadine, nothing mixed. No,no, wait, so they've never even
(01:52):
gone to like a fountain drink andgotten like like just yeah, like there's
the million choices and just start mixingeverything together. I would have yelled at
them across the restaurant. No.But anyway, so are you ready for
this? This is what I wasreading, and it's genius, and I
(02:13):
hope, I hope restaurants did iton purpose. But I guess the days
of like kids getting like Shirley Temple'sor or Roy Rogers done done mocktails,
like a fancy sort of fruity likewhatever whatever it's on the menu, right,
(02:36):
every I can't say every restaurant,and essentially every restaurant now has mocktails,
right, Yeah. And so they'llgo in there and mom and dad
will order whatever whatever drink they're getting, and the kids get a mocktail.
So you're saying because you hate mocktails. Yes, you're saying that, let
they let this be part of thekids menu instead of for the adults.
(03:00):
It's genius, Yes, but yeah, no, I would never order a
mocktail. I can't think of whatwould be wrong in the universe that I
ordered from the mocktail menu. Yeah. And I can speak from experience and
tell you if you're ever dining withhim, I think you'd like a mocktail.
(03:21):
You are going to be mocked ruthlessly. Yeah. Yeah, you know
what, get iced tea much easier. It was bad, Diane. He
would not shut up the whole meal. He just kept saying, I can't
believe you're drinking that. It's horrible, Like, what are you getting?
One of the brunch places we wentwhen we were in yes, Charleston,
we were in Charleston and you andKristen got mocktail. Yeah, it was
(03:44):
like some sort of just you know, I remember the hand signal that I
did. I do too. Itwould have take gave you the old Hartley
something different to try. It waslike laughing, try iced tea. Yeah,
Christen said, didn't the three ofus get mocked tails? And then
somebody got a beer? I didnot get a mocktail. No, maybe
(04:06):
zero chance, zero chance I gota mocktail. Drink coffee if you're not
going to drink liquor. The Yeah, there's a headline in the Onion yesterday
that was like eighteen dollars mocktail satisfiescraving to waste money. No, it's
true. No, that's the otherthing. Mocktails are so goddamn expensive.
But but parents are going out toeat and they'll go like, okay,
(04:30):
you know what, let's you know, when the when the when the waitress
comes by and says, you know, can I start anybody off with a
drink? The parents will get youknow, like glass wine or a cocktail
or martini or whatever, and thekids will order a mocktail. Wouldn't it
be weird if the waiters say it'svery odd? Yeah, if they've got
it's it's painful enough to have akid order because they don't speak up loud
(04:51):
enough. Oh no, we madeour kids order they don't. Yeah,
and I do too, but itat first takes a few times before they
get comfortable with it. But thenif how ridiculous would it sound if they
have the bar menu, Let meget at the uh, let me get
the the the bombay ginger breeze please. Some waiters and waitresses will say,
(05:15):
it's very awkward to have a likean eight year old get a mocktail,
right, But it's fine, there'snothing wrong with it. Yeah, he
loves the pineapple grapefruit yu Zoo.But there is no there is no there's
no liquor in it. So it'stotally fine. Now here's my other favorite
part. So that's younger kids,older kids, teenagers. Yeah, you
(05:42):
know what they're doing. What they'regoing for a happy hour for mocktails.
Yes, they'll go like they seetheir parents do it. Right, Hey,
let's all go to happy hour.Let's go to Coastguard Kurtz House and
have happy hour. So they'll allgo out to some place for happy hour
and they go get they'll go outto dinner and go get drinks minus their
(06:03):
parents. So they're paying. Yes, that's expensive, Yes, but it's
Friday. We're going for a happyhour. I've had a rough week at
school, Yes, I have,actually, and they go for a happy
hour. Isn't that awesome? Theheadline for this story isn't that great?
Come on, kids, let's grabdrinks. But it's the same thing they
(06:23):
said that starts with when they're younger, they go out with their parents and
they'll be like Friday, let's goearly, Like hey, let's go to
happy hour by the way, Likelike like think of every brewery or something
where where there's kids, parents willgo for a happy hour. So it
be like, oh, we're goingto the brewery. Yeah, mom and
dad are going for a happy hour. We're meeting up with the Willis's,
(06:44):
the Joneses, and the Clarks andhere we go. So the kids are
going for happy hour. Well,now I'm sixteen, let's all get in
Paul's card. We're going to happyhour. They said you could walk the
halls at schools and here all theteenage kids going like, oh, yeah,
it's Friday, we're going to That'sawesome. Like a my day,
we'd drink out of a keg anda feel. Isn't that great? Isn't
(07:08):
that great? Now? You saidyou hope restaurants did this on purpose.
I hope they're now doing it onpurpose because then it gets them to be
a customer for life. Well,a couple of things. Number One,
it's it makes money for the restaurant. Number two, customer for life.
I've been going to happy hour heresince I was fifteen. I love the
(07:30):
idea of the parents. And bythe way, like, I would never
drink mocktails, however, and Idon't know if this makes me a bad
parent or not, but I coulddefinitely see myself if the boys were still
at home grab it Jack on Fridayand going, hey, we're going to
happy hour, Come on, boys, here we go. Although I don't
(07:51):
know that I would get them likenon alcoholic beers, well I know I
never did, but I'd let themget a mocktail. Oh, now,
do some mocktails use zero proof booze? I don't care. I don't know.
Just for the taste, Yeah,what do I care? Well,
that's a whole I think feel likethat's another level. No, it's not.
That's fine. Zero proof booze.I gotta be honest. I'm being
(08:16):
completely honest. I didn't know theydid that. We've talked about that,
that they'll put zero proof, likelike a still zero proof whatever they want
to use beer, So you couldhave a non alcoholic beer in a mocktail.
Oh yeah, then I'm okay withthat. Would you let them order
just an oduleS? No, No, that's embarrassing. That is embarrassing your
(08:41):
mocktail over and a that's the mocktail? Yeah, no, no beer.
But what if it is a mocktailthat features like, say, say,
what's the uh uh the Guinness andchampagne? What is that called Guinness and
champagne? Yeah? What is thatblack velvet? Would you let your son
(09:03):
order a black velvet with the zeropercent Guinness and non alcoholic champagne? Would
I let Yeah, yeah, that'dbe totally fine. But if he ordered
the zero Guinness, No, no, I don't want I don't want him
ordering non alcoholic beer as beer everthe no. Yeah, it's just like
(09:26):
I don't want the trusting but Zin'sare fine. The yeah. I mean
I live in that world too too. It's actually a very consistent argument for
you did through his hockey bag,gloves, pads, and zins. What
about so Bill just posted on nextby the way, do you realize when
does Marley get home end of themonth. She still has a few weeks
(09:50):
left because of quarters. Yeah,my kid'll be home on Sunday. I
haven't seen him in four months.Maybe that's why I'm busting out of my
skin today. Is that right?I suppose you popped down there once.
Yeah, didn't you go see himplay hockey somewhere? That was in January?
It was wow. Yeah, Ihaven't seen him in four months.
As long as I've gone my entirelife without seeing him, that's the reality
(10:11):
a lot of Yeah no first timecollege parents. Yeah yeah, face sucks.
Yeah No, I can't wait forhim to get Home'm gonna welcome him
home with a black velvet and hisin Oh, that'll be in the entire
car ride home. He'll be onZen's. Bill wants to know if you
were ever fine with like the pinacoladas or the frozen dakeries virgin frozen dakyries,
if I'm okay with them? ForOh, they definitely had those because
(10:35):
those popped up a menu. Yeahthat that would be fine. Yeah,
like a virgin. I made himcall him that, but yeah, like
a Virgin Penia Colada Colada, Heya Klada, Well I got Boston calling
on the brain. Yeah, no, they love I love that song she
does with Lil Nas x Camilla Coladathe No No No. But yeah,
(10:56):
they've had Virgin dakeries or Virgin PinaColade. But yeah, I would let
him get like na liquor in amocktail, but just not straight away.
No, Like I would never letthem order a virgin vodka tonic. It
would probably have is there? You'reright, it is odds saying virgin.
(11:18):
Is there a new age way ofdescribing these like some woke way? Yeah,
give me a woke Colada? Idon't know. Is it the zero
alcohol drink or something alike? Youcan't say virgin. Jesus Christ John writes
when I go out to dinner andwe do get drinks, I let my
(11:41):
son, who is seventeen, justtake SIPs of mixed alcohol drinks. There
you go, all right, that'sfine, But he's not letting him get
mocktails. Just be cool. Butdoes does his kid and his buddies go
out for a happy hour and getmocktails and how weird does that? Forget
the servers, they may see itas an emerging trend. If you don't
know about this and you're at therestaurant. Also, oh and you're here,
(12:03):
I wonder what the hell is goingon at that table? And it
came out for a happy hour?Same thing you guys are doing. Hey
that high tops getting crazy? Seriously, you thought you hate it's in the
car seats at breweries they got teenagersin. But here's bar and grills.
But here's where. But but here'sthe beauty of the mocktail. It grows
with you so at at at youknow when when you can finally try the
(12:28):
real one, when you're sure,when you're surely temple age. You're getting
a mocktail because you're going out todinner with your parents. As you start
to get into early teens and stuff. When your when your parents go out
for happy hour, you're going outfor a happy hour with them. And
then when you're old enough just togo out with your friends, you're going
out for a happy hour. Sofor the business, this is genius.
(12:54):
I think this is what if yourson, well middle school, was like,
hey, we're having a sleepover atTeddy's house. You're like, what
are you guys doing? Well,first we're going to happy hour and then
we're gonna go play video games.Yeah, I would find that strange,
but that would be awesome because allhe's getting is mocktails. I'm guessing you
(13:18):
wouldn't be cool with him getting zeroproof vodka. No, I would not.
But this is where Applebee's, it'sworse than soda, needs to lean
into this buzzy new dollars. Well, they're bringing back dollar ritas, but
there's no profit charge families with kids. Ten bucks for a mocktail, right
(13:45):
dollar readers for the parents, twodollar riders for the kids. That's genius.
That's really smart. By the way, one other question, Yes,
can you buy kegs of n Abeer? You can think so? Why
not? I wouldn't more kids havinglike house parties with n A beer like
(14:09):
like middle school? No, theydon't like the taste of beer a middle
schooler, did you really like thetaste of beer when you started drinking beer?
I know two boys that did.Okay, much like the guy who
wrote in I was drinking. Iwas drinking for the purpose. I wasn't
(14:30):
drinking for the taste. Oh,they definitely drink for the purpose now absolutely.
Line two. Hi elliot in themorning. Yeah, Hi, who's
this? Hey? Yes, sorry, this is Tim. I'm from Maryland.
I actually sell liquor. Yes,they call it spiritless. They call
it spiritless spiritless spiritless happy Hour.By the way, I'm totally doing that.
(14:52):
You know, you know what Ineed. I'm opening. I'm opening
a bar near high schools. Spiritlesshappy hour three point thirty five, happy
hour four to six. That's geniusat my future. Four oh one case,
Thank you, awesome, thank you, my friend, thank you.
(15:13):
What what menu were you on?I'm trying to see. Oh, I
think that's what I had. Ihad, Oh, I had turmeric,
carrot, orange, pineapple, mangolime with ginger beer. Where was this?
This is when you made fun ofme. Oh that's right. And
(15:33):
it was served, you know howlike sometimes you get like on a bloody
Mary, you get like the stemand it has everything on it. Yeah,
and that came with a tampon.I think they even said to me,
if you desire, you can addgin. And I said, oh
no, no, no, please, are you are you kidding? Trying
to think straight? I got it'sI don't want to get a UTA.
(16:00):
What if I have to take atest. The other choice was grapefruit lime,
lemon simple syrup, rosemary lemon limesoda with with the gin option as
well with a Those are the shots, A shot of nitro cold brew.
(16:26):
Hi Elliott in the morning. Yeah, Hi, who's this? I'm Jordan's.
When my family would go to OceanCity and I'm one of the youngest
of the kids in I was aroundfive and I was I asked my dad
if I could get a strawberry Dapperbecause they're basically strawberry s moodie. I
(16:48):
was afraid to ask, so heasked for me. He told them that
it was for me. But Iguess there's too busy and it was not
virgins. Oh that happens, mistake, She'll be fine. Yeah, So
I passed. I passed out onone of my aunts, and so we
think it was because I was drunk. Probably probably, Hey, but let
me ask you, how old areyou now? How old are you now?
(17:11):
Twenty three? The you don't,well, maybe you do. Do
you have kids now? No?No? The but like, back up,
back up, when you were likesixteen or seventeen, wouldn't it be
cool to like, just grab allyour girlfriends and go for a happy hour.
Oh no, I couldn't even looklike I passed for twenty one now,
(17:32):
so there's no way I was gettingin. Then you got to go
spirit lists. You got to gofor the spirit list happy hour, which
I know sucks, but you're stillgoing out and enjoying the happy hour passing.
Yes, I'm telling you, andstumble my mistake. I don't even
know. Thank you, ma'am.I don't even know how mocktails became popular.
I think it's this sort of sobercurious movement. Yeah no, yeah,
(18:04):
I'm curious, what are you doing? I'm curious to get a buzz.
Were there some bars that are completelyfree of alcohol? I know,
I see the signs out front saysout of business. Stop it. Some
are very popular, not my house. Hi, hell yet the morning?
(18:27):
Hey, Good morningbody? How areyou? Hey? I'm doing great?
How are you? I'm good.So a couple of years back, this
is pretty pandemic, so like awhole life time ago, I worked as
a waiter in a pretty upscare restaurantdowntown and they had a pretty strong bar
menu. They made it so thateven families came in they wanted the kids
(18:48):
to be just as excited about thebar program as the adults were. So
read about nine mocktails available, anda lot of them had like the same
table service that the cocktails had.So think about like the snow that you
would do table side, or thecool receptacles that would pour in. And
one of the gin and tonics hadthis big gin infuser that you would put
like flowers and such in. Well, one of the mocktails also had a
(19:11):
very similar receptacle that you would pourtable side for the kids. And I
remember this drink runner. In oneof his first weeks, a kid ordered
some fancy smanty drink and table sidehe poured in about an ounce and a
half of gin into his mocktail.Parents didn't know, the kid didn't know.
Next to you know, the kidsstarted laughing, and every good time
(19:33):
he orders a second mocktail wow drinkwhen it was the exact same thing.
And it wasn't until about halfway throughthe second drink that the parents realized something
was up, and they tasted hiscocktail and sure enough kid was drunk off
his ass. Hey, what isthe what is the passed? Hey?
What is the what is the whatis the burden? And the parents were
(19:56):
actually they were okay with the parentswere fun with it. They thought it
was hilarious. Oh sweet, Whatis it? What is the what?
Thank you sir? What is whatis the bourbon drink? I don't drink
them, but is it a Manhattanthat like everybody does, like a smoked
Manhattan now or an old fashion,old fashion, a smoky old fashion.
You imagine some eight year old kidgetting one of those, I'd laugh my
(20:18):
ass off, like twenty dollars.No. He brings up a good point
though, And I've had a coupleof calls like this. How do you
if you have a no booze?If you choose section of the menu so
there is the option to add gin, there's always fun rhymes to it,
what do you do to indicate tothe server as the bartender, this is
(20:40):
the virbon one doesn't have alcohol.I don't know the answer to that.
I really don't. That could bea dangerous game. I mean if you
went out, if you went outfor for you took the kids, you
were going out for a happy hour, right or you were going out for
a fancy dinner and we were youknow what, let's get around the cocktails
and mom and dad get old fashions, but you want to virgin old fash
(21:00):
I don't know is there is there? Is there? I don't drink them,
but is there is there something inan old fashioned like is there like
a cherry or or something in therewhere you could put like two for the
adult? Twice more obvious than that? Why? Because if it's a darker
drink like you're not going to seethe components inside, well, you know
(21:23):
what taste them? Did you nothear the list of things that were in
my U? Yours was easy totell though, because I had a big
string hanging down the outside of theglass. And to Eric, who thought
it was funny that I to sayI didn't have the gin because we were
putting out our summer pillows tonight,I will let you know. And Elliott
(21:45):
recalls this as well. I'm sureit was Halloween weekend. It was fall
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