The Woody Show May 17th 2024 Podcast

Fail Stories, The DUIQ, Nerdin Out, Dad Jokes and more!

Episode Transcript

(00:02):
It is due to the graphic natureof this program. Listener discretion. Is
it lies my thing? That's notthe Woody Show. I believe this is

(00:24):
the Woody Show. Insensitivity Training classis now in session. A good morning

(00:45):
everybody. Morning. You know Iwoke up in a really good mood this
morning. I couldn't figure out whywhy. They looked at my watch and
it said it was May seventeenth,twenty twenty four. You guys, today
is Friday? Answer tight shit?Git yeah, so tight, and I

(01:06):
have no plans this weekend. Welcometo it. I'm one of you.
That's Raby ge Ray, There's GregGory Menace, Good morning to you.
Good morning wood If we got SeaBass, we got Sammy Bort, Caroline,
They're both here, Morgan Gee's here, Von Chee's here, and our
VIP you are here. Welcome toFriday. It is the Woody Show.

(01:30):
Yes, Friday morning now officially underway. Who's the Woody Show? Phones are
open eight seven seven forty four WoodyFriday check ins on the text over to
two to nine eight seven. Ifyou'd like to send us something through social
media, you can find us thereat the Woody Show. Coming up for
you. This morning Friday fail storiesof course. Uh you know, natch,

(01:52):
We've got the Dumbass Contest, gotthe dui Q that's happening today this
hour before the hour's up. Ravey'sgonna tellus what's happening in the world of
nerds, the Nerd and Out Report, plus your birthdays there and I think
we're gonna shoehorn some dad jokes intothe mix this morning. I've had one
in my pocket for like two weeks. Wow, it's good. The Steelers

(02:15):
actually did a pretty funny thing.Did you see where, like right before
they announced the schedule, the newNFL schedule rave I didn't see it.
Yeah, So they had James Harrisonsitting there and he was trying to keep
well, not trying to keep astraight face. He was just keeping his
debo face as a teammates starting withRussell Wilson. We're trying to get him

(02:39):
to crack. And if they canget him to crack that they would,
you know, get a sneak peekat the at the schedule. Yeah,
and it was it was just abunch of different dad jokes. Oh yeah,
I thought it was pretty funny.Here here's a here's here's a love
I can play the whole Why didthe pony asked for a glass of water?

(02:59):
Debo? Because it was a littlehorse? Why so serious? What
do you call a jet that fliesbackwards? You might get this one.
Receding airline would get explained the jokeshair thing. We'll just go to the
next one. No, no,we're not, because the receding hairline is
like airline. But you're saying Iwould get it because well, just I

(03:20):
feel like you know a lot ofpeople with hair disabilities. Why couldn't anyone
see the falcon? I don't knowwhere it was flying, so, yeah,
it was in disguise, disguise,get it and they were all trying
to get him the crack and he'sjust nope, Nope, not happening.
Well, why would I understand?Why would understand that? Yeah? I

(03:44):
thought that's pretty fun. Anyways,it's dad jokes coming up for you here
on the what do you show thismorning? Get those ready to be able
to call in texting with those?Uh? I told you about the numbers
check ins? All right, we'regood, all right, good on that.
Well, the US is going torequire automatic emergency breaking on all new
vehicles within five years and officials saythat could save hundreds of lives every year.
I saw that story breaking out,like, oh, you know,

(04:06):
not a bad idea. It's weirdwhen you forget you have it. Yeah,
I had it. Yeah, ithappened to me the other day.
I was like backing up in aparking lot and then automatically like slammed on
the brake. Right, was therea car coming? There was something like
a post behind you or something.There was something behind me, Yeah,
like a car that was that Icouldn't see right, go slowly. I

(04:29):
think that's fine. I've had engagewhen I didn't want it to engage.
Oh you know, like I know, like I'm pulling into a parking spot
and there's you know, obstacles oneither side, but I got it right.
And all of a sudden it goesand just like oh locks up,
and I'm like, I got it. I see I'm actually paying attention.
But I think it's good because there'sa ton of people that is darn't paying
attention. There was a I'm payingattention to anything. There was a video

(04:51):
that I saw yesterday whereas this guyis driving a big like tractor trailer truck
and of course he's got the dashcam m hm. And you know those
trucks that they use when they're doingroadwork, and it has like the big
springy bouncy thing on the back,like the crash guard and has the big
flying you know, yeah, bigsign that has like a flashing arrows arrow

(05:12):
to get to move over because they'redoing work in that lane. Yeah,
so just in case somebody hits theback of the truck, there's a little
bit of give right uh there.Well, this guy driving attractive trailer texting
driving smashes into this thing. Yeah, that's scary. So for like,
you know, drivers of regular vehicles, if they're doing something like that.
I mean, this is good,dude. I heard the saddest thing,

(05:33):
however, it was like for theroad Workers' Union or whatever, that they
have a yearly ceremony for the peoplethat die that work on the road.
Oh yeah, I believe it's sorry, automatically, this is the date where
we celebrate everybody that year. That'sso sad. I see a lot of
these guys man, like, Imean, they're on the highway, they're

(05:54):
doing this work and they are likeright on the edge of like where the
cones are. Yea and they're likedown, like low to the ground,
right within inches of Yes, speakingcars, they should have bumped those cones
out a little bit taken like anotherlane or something because it was so close.
Yeah, I couldn't do it.So like they could probably high five
someone from the passenger seat of acar going by. Totally. Yeah,

(06:15):
other car stuff, it's the endof an era at Chevrolet. They've announced
that they are discontinuing the Chevy Malibu, which is their last normal four door
sedan. So they've still got Mustangsand Chevy Bolt electric vehicles, but other
than that, it's all trucks andSUVs. The Malibu, debuted in nineteen
sixty four, is a luxury versionof the Chevelle, but they say cars

(06:41):
pretty much done now. Four discontinuedthe Tourists in twenty eighteen, so now
the Mustang's the only traditional car thatthey sell. Wow. The Toyota camer
was the best selling traditional car lastyear, but it was eighth overall,
behind a bunch of trucks and SUVs. So you know you're not true.
I guess all the new stuff yousee like smallest US, Yeah, you

(07:02):
don't see really sedan totally so popularanymore. I had one Chevy my whole
life. It was the Chevy celebritystation wagon. It was such a piece.
No, you had a station wagon? Yeah, I as, you're
as my car, go to highschool car. Okay, it sucked.
What about your classic Mustang? Thatthing didn't last very long, the sixty

(07:23):
five Mustang at the time, becausethey put it in the car museum or
by the time I got it,Like I've told you, and you guys
have all ignored. It went throughlike five owners before I got it.
It was that classic Mustang. Itwas aler. Yeah, I had a
celebrity but it wasn't a wagon nowit was just a four door. Yeah.
Every time I'm in like a car, I feel like I'm kind of

(07:44):
ladylike versus SUV and STV. Yeah, it's like, oh, let me
grab my my clutch. Yeah,my son Tress, I had a rental
recently. There was a sedan.Yeah, Medsie were with me. Yeah,
and I was like, oh mygod, this thing is low because
I'm so used to I've had anSUV for god forever now. Yeah.

(08:07):
The most stolen vehicles last year wereHyundai's and Kias. We knew about Kias.
Yeah, just because they're so easyto break into, and everybody was
sharing those videos, but specifically theHyundai Elantra, the Hyundai Sonata, Kia
Soul, Kia Forte Kiya Sportage.Other vehicles that were on the list were
the Honda Accord, the Honda Civic, the Chevy Silverado fifteen hundred pickup,

(08:31):
and the Ford F one fifty pickupas the as the most stolen vehicles.
Brand new pickups are so expensive.Yeah, that's why they're probably getting stolen.
Also the parts, oh, theparts. Yeah. I never really
really really realized just how expensive pickupswere. Yeah bank, Yeah, so

(08:52):
much money, megabank. Like mydad was going through at one point,
like uh, you know, needinga new new truck, but he uses
it for work, racehorses and youknow needs needs the truck for that.
But I guess I never really paidattention because he was like talking about some
of these prices and I'm like,huh, yeah, what do you He
goes, well, you look ata brand because he's look at it used.

(09:15):
You look at brand new? Areyou kidding? Like a luxury car?
What? Yeah? Plus I keepI have a truck and I keep
the tailgate locked. It has alock feature because people steal them. Yeah,
that was big for a while.That was like what catalytic converters became,
right pretty much. Yeah, likeeverybody was stealing catalytic converters here recently,
you know. But the yeah,the tailgates from pickup, they take

(09:37):
tailgates. Yeah, how did yousee menace? There was there was a
story I think it was ABC Newsand they were showing all these Tesla supercharger
stations throughout the San Francisco Bay areaand they're all completely disabled because crackheads people
are going there and and they're cuttingthe cords off. Oh my god,

(10:00):
because there's so much copper in there. Yeah. And so you go to
these like supercharger stations and there'll belike thirty Tesla superchargers there. None of
them have the cord. Wow,it's just all cut off like a pugs
tail blow right at the top.And I'm thinking, like, how do
they not electrocute the crap out ofthemselves cutting? But I guess there's no
electricity going to it unless it's youknow, operational. Yeah, But they're

(10:24):
like, well you might think thisis part of like an overhaul operation.
No, And there's they're the ABCNews guys showed us if you look under
here and you look at the cable, like, it's almost all copper.
So of course these losers they gothere and they came there and they cut
them all, I mean like dozensof them. It's all over. What
is happening cal converters, Yeah,tailgates, Yeah, the copper stealing.

(10:48):
Yeah, people are taking like thecopper out of street lights. Don't you
feel like highway signs, like acomplete loser doing this stuff? Or they
just don't care? Yeah, youcan cash it in, I guess yeople,
like after you cash it in,you don't feel like a piece of
crap after I know, what's thatlike? Yeah? No shame, Yeah,
shame, no shame. Eight sevenseven forty four. Woodie is the

(11:11):
phone number you can hit some ofthe text Friday check ins over to two
to nine eighty seven. Tell usyour name, and then at what part
of town you're listening to the WoodyShow this morning? Weekend plans have told
you mine, I got nothing goingon, nothing, and I'm so excited
about it. Good. It's ourfavorite kind of weekend, Greg, I
know. But if you got somethingexciting that you're looking forward to. Even
if it's nothing or someone something you'dlike to have us mentioned with your check

(11:33):
in, just include it with yourtext over to two two nine eight seven.
We're gonna take a quick break.We got some more Woodies show for
you. Next, hang on theWitty Show. We'll be back in a
sec. Hey, it's man,it's check out. The Lazy Dog Restaurants
made to order lunch specials three dollarsoff road trip bles and other delicious meals
starting at only eight dollars and seventyfive cents, available every day until four

(11:54):
pm. Order for pickup or delivery, free delivery on orders over twenty five
dollars. Lazy Dog Restaurants. Ifyou go out in the hall and test
fire and there's no smell, andthen you come in here in your far
do it out loud. The WoodyShow, Yeah, fluff, just fluff.
Yeah, it's an insensitivity training fora politically correct world. It is

(12:18):
Friday morning, you guys. Yeah, yeah, May seventeen, twenty twenty
four. What's good, I'm Woody. That's raving oh lfg g riv Yes,
there's Greg Gory, some very intensemusic. It really is. Yeah,
then Ice is here what is up? What is he basking? Morning?
There's Sammy Morning and the phones areopen for you at eight seven seven

(12:39):
forty four Wooding. You can hitus up with the text over to two
to nine eight seven Friday check ins. Tell us who you are where around
town? You're listening to the WoodieShow this morning? Anything anyone that I'd
like to have us mentioned when weget to your check in, send it
on over to to nine eight seven. Greg sad, he's actually kind of
nervous about something going on this weekend. Yeah, shouldn't be nervous at all.

(13:01):
This is something so a name tobe nervous about. But I have
a friend who I haven't seen himlike twenty years. Yeah, and we're
hanging out tomorrow. And I thought, what if we have nothing to talk
about, won't have twenty years oflike, so, what have you been
up to the last twenty years?How does happen? How do you reconnect?

(13:22):
Or have you always like talked butnever saw I really ran into him
at a work event like a yearago, and it's been one of those
things like, oh we should hangout, we should hang out, And
then finally here we are a yearlater, and we finally had the same
weekend available. So you set itup where it's like something short, like
a dinner or a drink, likedrinks, but like coming over to someone's

(13:43):
house. Yeah, my house.Oh see you messed up? Really yeah,
because if it's weird throughout there.I said, do you want to
meet up somewhere or just come overor your house or what? And he
said, yeah, I'll come toyour place. Right, But that's what
I'm saying. It's like a firstdate, right. You set up like,
hey, let's meet for drinks,and then you leave it open afterwards.
You meet early enough to hey,you want to go grab a BikeE

(14:03):
right as opposed, you can leaveit open. Well, hey, good
to see you. I gotta go. But now it's at your house.
It's like you can leave like areally got it? Are you in touch
on Facebook and stuff? Barely?Really barely? All right? So it
looks it's kind of nervous. It'llbe great, it'll be fine. You
love it that you won't be entertaining. No, that they're just going to
run out of things to talk aboutit now, it'll be fun really yeah.

(14:26):
I mean there's guys, one majortopic something that's happened in the past
twenty years with you? That's true? Yet, okay, you can bring
that true. Guess what why willthey be surprised when Mario walks in?
Wait, what's happening? What happenedto Ellen? Have you met my roommate?
That's my study about it. Sois this like a work friend or

(14:48):
used to work We used to worktogether, okay a hundred years ago.
Is somebody that we know? Youmight yeah, yeah, you might know.
I'm not sure, but you might. Who is it? His name
is Chris Muckley. Oh yeah,yeah, I do know. I do
know that. Okay, yeah,no, you'll be fine. Dude.
He's a social dude. He totallyis. I'm not. Yeah, he's

(15:09):
not like some you know, weknow some pretty weird people. Exactly.
He's not. I wouldn't classify himas a weird person at all. He's
totally cool. No, I don'tthink he's weird. Yeah, I think
I'm weird. He used to goon the air as Muckley. Right,
that was his on air name,Muckley. Right. That's cool, dude.
You have Muckley comeing in your house. That's how sucky him forever.

(15:31):
There's a rare invite around here.All right, guys, it's not Who
wants to take a bet on whatmenace is doing this weekend? Anybody I'm
going to a festival? To afestival, Yeah, let's say I'm getting
a chicken sandwich. Getting a chickensandwich. Also a great guess, seastard

(15:52):
Sammy going to a mall? Anothergreat guest club you have? Any I
guesses book club? Book club?Going to another music yes, special d
C. Oh god, that's sobad. Well I can imagine the that

(16:14):
you wouldn't enjoy it. What areyou saying that aren't parents looking for?
Yeah, this is the thing onsite babysitter, Like, you got kids,
you're going to e d C.So you didn't get like really high?
Yeah, so well a lot ofpeople bring the kids. But yeah,
DC also has campgrounds like some festivals, and people are like camping in
RVs and so like in these uhgroup Facebook groups, they're saying, hey,

(16:41):
uh, if you can watch mykids, I'll pay you one hundred
dollars an hour. They go,yeah, we'll take off go see some
DJ for like an hour or twoand then we'll come back. But who
can babysit? Wow? Like Wow, that's an hour. I just I
would never bring kids to music festival. But also like you're just soliciting strangers
to babysit. Yeah, just outthere people at EATI festival. Like,

(17:04):
so you have to you have tohave passes to get into the area.
But you're gonna have a bunch ofyunkies. Yes, well there's a rich
junkies. Yeah, clearly it's notwhere I'll be looking for babysitters a bunch
of millionaire of course, not becauseyou're a responsible parent. I just want
to bring kids into You're not draggingkids to eat C. No, you

(17:25):
know this is the Electric Daisy Carnival. It's all electronic dance music. Of
course that's a big dancer, youknow. I love dancing. So do
you have like low sticks and allthat cramp and you're out there? No,
no, no, I don't bigbig dropping you there to see David
Ghetta. I love David Ghetta.I saw him in uh Abia. Yeah.

(17:48):
Well, I hope whatever you gotgoing on this weekend it's something really
cool. Let us know on thatFriday, check in over to two to
nine eight seven, ready to gowith some I would say it would be
some pretty great Friday fail stories.I think you guys are really gonna like
these. You're on the Woody Show, Ladies and gentlemen, Boys and girls,

(18:45):
It is time once again for yourFriday failed story. All these people
thought they had the perfect plan,the plan that can never go wrong.
But somewhere along the line it wentfrom being a great idea the one big
stake in Mega uber ultra better thanlast week, way better than last week.

(19:21):
Last week was Atrocian. That's allright, Look, this is this
is a very interactive round of thefail stories. All right, and I'm
gonna start with this one. SeaBasketball talking about this. This is one
of the most shared things on socialmedia this week. A video from a
graduation ceremony at Thomas Jefferson University inPhilly, where the world's dumbest woman was
in charge of reading the names ofthe graduates for the nursing students as they

(19:45):
took the stage to get their diplomas. Now I'm gonna play I'm gonna play
some of the names and let's seeif you can figure out what they're supposed
to be. All right, thisis like when we do the menace pronunciation.
Figure. Yeah, but the Okay, so these are the names.
See if you can figure it out, here we go, call all right,

(20:07):
okay, Alison cole Bishop Alison Bishop, call Allison the Cole Bishop.
Pretty good, guys, that's prettygood. You guys did a good job.
All right. How about this one? Ciccu Lynn Boer, Jessica Linn
Bower, Jessica Lynn Bauercu. Yeah, just Lynn. Now again, they

(20:34):
started with the a's and they're goingall the way down through the disease.
They got to the l's before theypulled this woman and put somebody else in
there. She made it all theway through the l's. All right,
here's the next one that's gonna bemore difficult, Jean, that would be

(20:57):
Meghan Louise Aubrey. Yeah, yeah, god. So yeah. Does she
work there still versus educating other people? She want to say, obviously on
the staff of a nursing school,right, yeah, and she thinks Maginu
is a name of these are names. Wait, there's more. Here we

(21:17):
go, sire Voon Jean Jun goodluck with that one. You're never going
there? Can you do that onemore time? I've got one thousand dollars
right now for anybody who can giveme two out of the three names.
Can we play it one more time? Although Sea Bass has heard this,
so yeah, A thousands of bocks, Okay, yeah, here we Goire,

(21:41):
Voon Jean Jun. Forget about it. I have seen all these I
don't know the answer. Sawyer IvanSawyer Gellan Okay, Von Jean Ju.
So it helps know that almost allof them are female. So that's a
that's a clue. Okay, Eugene, anybody Jane probably Sarah girl, Jesu.

(22:11):
I want to play one more time, and you gotta give me your
guest. Voon Jeane Ju. SireOkay, Sarah Ju. That's what I
said, Yeah, change you.I have no idea what June Sarah Sarah
Virginia Brennan Wow, Voon Jeane Ju. Yeah, Sarah Virginia Brennan Wow.

(22:40):
Okay Wow. There's a thing calledunderstanding your skill set, like if you
got nominated to do that job,just saying yeah, not do it.
I'm not sure this is this isthe one for me? All right?
How about this one? Battista Santos? All right, Stephanie Santos, step

(23:04):
very good. You gotta get thepattern after a while. Was now keep
in mind. The name of theschool is Thomas Jefferson University. Here's the
next name to May whoa prose TomMay May, Thomas Thomas, Michael Calvert

(23:30):
Thomas, because the guy goes it'sThomas Thomas. Oh my god. And
then this is the one that whereall the audio came from. Was the
video of this family. They werewatching video screen of the graduation and like
the grandma gets up. It musthave been her grandma, and it's like
what because here's the embarrassing Yeah,here's the name. Victoria Lee. Okay,

(23:56):
so Victoria all right across all right? So Victoria, all right,
so we got that part. Yeah, Lee, Victoria Elizabeth Bruce is the
name. She starts putting the otherletters in there like Menace does. So
he says, is this the graduationfrom Menaces High School? Yeah? The

(24:21):
schools apologized blamed it on the poorphonetic spellings of the card. Now what
happened is the I'd love to seethose, Yeah, unfortunately, only a
few have been posted. But basicallythey do like we do with the minisuta
today. They do their actual name, which should be what she should be
reading, and they have finetic spellingbecause there were some tough ones in there.
Yeah, like Sarah, Jessica,Stephanie half of them and she and

(24:42):
later on she goes, as shewas leading, I'm sorry, I was
reading the phonetic spelling. Well,just if it says Thomas Thomas, right,
what did you think? It was? Absolutely no excuse. Yeah,
yeah, she's dummy. Some otherFriday failed stories. Some people really like
to cook, you know, theyget excited about trying new recipes, like
this woman. And this is oneof those situations where I have weird empathy

(25:06):
you guys, because I feel sobad for this poor mom. She spent
a ton of time making this verylovely Tuscan chicken dinner with a fancy olive
oil that she had ordered online.But when she served it, there was
something off about it. They realizedit as soon as they tasted it.
Here's the here's the olive oil.There looks like a real fancy olive oil.

(25:30):
Well it turns out shower gel,guys. Yeah, the brand is
pure Greek olive oil. Shower geljel. Yeah, the whole looks like
so the whole thing tasted like soap, so bad. Look at what my
poor mother did. She just cookedthis beautiful meal, this like Tuscan chicken,

(25:53):
and this amazing sauce with a newolive oil that she ordered from online,
pure Greek olive oil. And onlyafter she finished did we discover that
it's shower gel that you could tastelike straight up soap. How do you
feel right now? Like I wantto physically hurt and want to hit something
hard. Yeah, she was sopissed, so bummed, so embarrassed.

(26:15):
I felt so bad for her.Well, there's so many of these shower
plants that are like that are madeof food. Olive oil is so hot
right now they want to incorporate intoeverything. Well, this next one all
that. This is from Vegas wherethere's a small business. It's a hot
dog spot's called Dirt Dog. Theyhad a blue event last weekend, meant

(26:36):
to be a fun family day.Costumed characters, face painting, games,
all kinds of stuff, free,open the public. This is a very
small place, you know. Theyweren't expecting maybe more than a couple of
dozen regular regular locals. But somehowwhen viral thousands of people showed up,
they weren't prepared for that. Sothere were long lines out front. The

(26:57):
special Bluey treats gobbled up. Thereweren't enough games or swag for all the
kids. On top of that,not an official Blue event obviously, so
the costumes just cheap stuff from Amazon. There weren't professional face painters. Basically,
it was just like a like akid's birthday party. It's not Disneyland
and it was free at a hotdog place. But parents, they were

(27:21):
pissed, outraged. Some complained thatit ruined their kids day. Others were
livid that they drove an hour toseeing a grown man in pj's. What
do you think it was gonna bethe real bluey bleuie from Australia, real
actual blue. Here are some ofthe parents and kids talking about how upset
they were. Give me a break. The kids were distraught. Some kids

(27:44):
were crying. Some kids were upset, crying in their parents' shoulders. It
was a very upsetting moment to seeso many kids, especially my daughter,
just especially I saw him, mydesire him. I was sad. He
looked like unexpected. We could likehear we can see his beer. They
probably picked up one of the panhandlersoff lost. The restaurant admitted they were

(28:08):
just overwhelmed. They said they underestimatedthe power of Bluey. They posted an
apology on social media saying We're trulysorry. Blah blah blah blah blah.
Side note the parents who are throwingan ish fit, they're douchebags, Like
nobody was wrong. Here was afree event by a small business. I
don't know what you expected. Whatdo you want? You know? All
right, so something then turn outthe way that you thought it was going

(28:30):
to your your child has to dealwith a little bit of disappointment, like,
yeah, suck it up. We'realso talking about dirt Dog. This
is a place that sounds like duiDog, So lower your expectations. Yeah,
yeah, I commend their marketing though, yeah commend you. I mean,
and if Nickelodeon foun out about it, they wouldn't like it. But
yeah, for sure, I mean, look how many how many of these
things come up where you know,these little Batman shows up to whoever you

(28:56):
know, shows up to the kids'birthday parties. It's not sanctioned by d
C or Yeah, I think ofthat anytime I want to drive by like
one of those like really low rentdaycares and there's the Elmo kind of like
messed up on the painting on theside of the building. And they weren't
trying to make money off it wasa free thing. They're just trying to
do something fun, bunch, Don'tis the definitition of trying to make money?

(29:17):
All right? Well, let's justsay that you and your buddy are
walking out of the store with acash register in your hand. That's my
favorite story of the week. Greatvideo. Who is the last person you'd
want to run into as you walkedout the door. I don't know,
maybe the cops, maybe a policeWell that's what happened to this chick and
her friend in Seattle, and thanksto the officer's body cam, we have
a clip of the moment she walkedright into him with the cash register in

(29:41):
her hands. Take a listen,right now, there you go this register.
It was getting such a great heist. Yeah, well, there's your
fail stories everybody. We're gonna takea quick break. We'll come back.

(30:03):
We got some more Friday Woody Showfor your next hang on this show.
Well, just in time for theweekend. Researchers in Switzerland have come up
with a gel that coach your stomachcan prevent you from getting drunk. Right
who wants that drink alcohol for thetaste. Does that Let me take some

(30:26):
gel and then just drink a lot. They think it might also be able
to sober people up. Now,that would be cool. That would that
would be good. This is forSammy and all the other astrology wackos out
there. Did you know that theluckiest day of the year is tomorrow?
I did know that because of somethingcalled the Jupiter Kazimi Okay, right,

(30:52):
as I am i ka. Soyou comes from an Arabic word meaning in
the heart, and you want toexplain, go ahead. Jupiter is the
giver of gifts and luck, sothat's what it represents. So it's a
very good planet, and every yearthere is a best best day of the
year. Yeah, it's when Jupiteris in conjunction with the Sun or within

(31:15):
at least one degree of alignment.That means a degree away from lining up
with it from Earth's perspective. Okay, So that's going to happen at exactly
two thirty six pm Eastern time tomorrow, So two thirty six Eastern eleven thirty
six Pacific tomorrow morning. Casino.That's luck, right, that's the things

(31:37):
that's the luck. According to astrologers. We won't see this level of collective
luck again until June twenty fourth ofnext year, sub scratchers. Yeah,
and that is the exact moment,but it also two days before and two
days after still effective, so it'skind of already start, kind of like
the eclipse. Awesome thirty days cliffsn Why is a Roman gode? Why

(32:04):
is that paired with Arabic word?I think it might be all just kind
of mumble jumper. Probably probably Jupiteris a good planet, though, Are
you will the luckiest day of theyear? No? I mean, come
on, Yeah, Braby's got Raby'sgot our NERD Now report coming up.
We got your birthday, your porna birthday also in there for you this

(32:27):
morning here on the Woody Show.Plus phones are opening at eight seven seven
forty four. Wood You can hitsome of the text over to two to
nine eight seven. What you're workingon for NERD Now Rave, We're going
to talk about what critics are sayingabout IF and some new stuff to streaming
and some exciting dates. Oh andour daily mention of Japan. Oh does

(32:47):
that count for what you just prementioned? Hello, Welcome to another edition of
the Menace cooking corners. Yes yet. Now today I'm going to give you
a really quick recipe on how tobe a hit at any party. Oh
yes, ship check out my yes, oh yeah, yes, you have
some menace your old famous wieners rightthere? Yes, thank you? Yeah,
I like to hust's a woody shoe. Have you sent us for Friday

(33:09):
check in yet? Really you shoulddo that? Els what you got going
on this weekend? What are youexcited about? Is there anything anyone you'd
like to have us mention? Whenwe get some of these Friday check in
send them on over on the Textover to two to nine eight seven.
Just ask to you include your nameand then what part of town you're listening
to The Woody Show this morning?Again, text on over to two two

(33:30):
nine eighty seven. Ready you readyto go? I am time for some
nerd out The Woody Show presents NerdEdge with our special nerd correspondent Ravy.
All right, what's happening in theworld of nerds? Well, the big
movie out this weekend is If IfIf, meaning imaginary friends, as a

(33:50):
young girl can discover her discovers herability to see them after her dad gets
sick and lands in the hospital,mister John Krasinski, Yeah, thing,
Hayleie Fleming. She was Judith inThe Walking Dead. She's the young girl.
Ryan Reynolds plays a guy with thesame ability, and they go on
this quest to reunite IFFs with theiradults. John Krasinski wrote and directed it.
He also plays the sick dad.This stellar voice cast includes Emily Blunt,

(34:14):
Steve Carell, Phoebe waller Bridge,Aquafina, and tons of tons of
others. Critics say there is afoundation of a good movie here, but
doesn't exactly have the magic of sayPixar movies. It has a fifty three
percent from critics. The Strangers Chapterone, which is the first movie of
a trilogy that director Rennie Harlan shotin fifty two days in Slovakia, back

(34:37):
to back to back in fifty twodays, saying nothing is too ambitious for
him, but the reviews for Chapterone are really bad twenty two percent from
critics, though I doubt the teensthat this movie's targeting will care. Director
Sam Taylor Johnson, who I hada lovely conversation with at the airport while
her husband, Aaron Taylor Johnson wason the phone. The whole time,

(34:58):
but she and I had a lovelychat. She directs this Amy Winehouse movie,
Back to Black, which is aboutAmy putting together that album, and
critics are saying this movie doesn't breakany new ground whatsoever. Thirty six percent?
Why are we so obsessed with AmyWinehouse? Is it because she died?
Honest question? Probably? Probably?Probably? She wasn't that great.
Sorry, I mean, her musicwas super unique. I loved her.

(35:21):
Oh my god. Seeing her atLollapalooza was probably one of the best sets
I've ever seen in my whole life. Yeah, yeah, it was great
live, Yeah cool. Yeah,I know you didn't care about her,
but right, I don't like howmuch we're still talking about her all these
years later. It's weird. Yeah, yeah, I don't get it.
But there's like way better documentaries outthere than probably this movie. New to
streaming this weekend. Shout out toTony the Bookie, who loves Manchester United

(35:45):
more than any other team on Earth, and there's a documentary series about that
team on Prime Video called ninety nine. David Beckham is back participating in that
so chois down, Greg? Areyou still down with RuPaul? I haven't
watched the latest season Rag kind ofFallen off RuPaul's Drag Race All Star Season

(36:05):
nine is on Paramount Plus. AtUpfronts this week, Disney revealed that the
WandaVision spin off Agatha All Along,which puts Jessica Han's Agatha Hearkness front and
center. We'll debut on September eighteenth, nice with two episodes, and you're
all my witnesses, Sammy, youare invited to my house to come watch
with me? Okay, well,yeah, thank you. I found out

(36:25):
she loves WandaVision. Now we canbond over something. Yeahvibes. Meanwhile,
audiences can expect Daredevil Born Again inMarch twenty twenty five and Ironheart also coming
in twenty twenty five, and adaily mention of Japan. You be Soft
put out a massive story trailer forAssassin's Creed Hard Shadows, and this is

(36:49):
the first Assassin's Creed game to besent in Japan. Much like Assassin's Creed
Syndicate, Shadows follows two protagonists andyou can switch back and forth as you
play through the campaign for the firsttime. One of these people is based
on an actual person, Ysuki.Originally from Africa, Yusuki came to Japan
with the Portuguese in fifteen seventy nine. It soon became a samurai employed by

(37:15):
a Lord. You can pre orderthat game now. It is coming out
on November fifteenth. I'm raving formore nerd stuff. Check out the nerd
Nod podcast at the Woodieshow dot com. All right, thank you very much,
Rails. Yes, we're gonna takea quick break. We got some
more Woodies Show for you. Next, hang on the Woody Show. We'll
be right back. Now here's whereit gets real good. This will give

(37:37):
Great Cory's and much needed time tothink about everything. He's gonna vacuum when
he gets on later the Woody Show. And we are into another new hour
insensitivity training for a politically correct worldon a Friday morning. Yeah yeah,

(37:58):
it is May seventeenth, four Woody, Bravy, ray Seed, Bass through
Samuel. Phones are open. We'relooking for someone to play our dumb ass
contest. We're gonna do the duIq one. It's actually a busy hour
for you guys. A lot isbeing asked because not only do we need
a contestant for the Duyq. Whatwe're gonna do right now been in the

(38:21):
next segment some dad jokes, Sowe'll need your dad jokes. Friday dad
jokes coming up this hours? Wellwhat an hour? What is that?
As we try, our heart isto move through the morning and into the
weekend as quickly as we can.Try too hard again, if you want
to play and be our contested forthe DUIQ, give us a call right
now at eight seven seven forty fourWoody. That's eight seven seven forty four

(38:45):
wooding, and see bets want yougo ahead and explain the way the game
works to everybody plays. Find somebodywho's a drunk or maybe on some other
things as we're about to hear andask them just the gosh ourn easiest questions
you've ever even heard of. Soif you play the game not by answering
those questions, that's easy. Youguess whether the drunk person can get on
it. If you guess correctly,two times out of three, you win.
All right, and let's go tothe phones and let's say hello to

(39:08):
how about the Jasmine? Good morningJazz, Yes, Jasmine, can you
hear us? Jasmine? Yes?Oh my finger was on the trigger?
Wowhi almost lost down? All right, Jasmine, you are going to be
the contestant for the d U iQ. And before we get into I

(39:28):
should probably ask you, how's yourmorning going? All right? How rood
of me? Pretty good? Prettygood? Being good? This is really
the Friday energy. I'm looking forwardwell, Jasmine, alright, have girl
come on? All right, Jasmine, let's get to know the drunk first
before we get to the questions thatcount. Who do we have here?
Sea Bass Larry? It gets youready minutes for your weekend at the E

(39:52):
d C, the Big Rave Festival, whatever it is. He's gonna talk
about what he's been doing. Thatmight be something to alat of those folks
are doing? All right? Ohyeah, drinking party. What are you
doing tonight? Yes, drinking party, cook molly, ecstasy? Oh god,
you're doing all those drugs? Whynot, sir? So what are
you drinking? I had like fourshots of tequila, had a vodka,

(40:15):
crying it's not bad. And thenyou said other drugs involved? Yeah,
of course, what what are thosedrugs? But are you gonna are you
recording me? Of course yes,I can be talking like this on video.
Well we'll talk about drugs then,okay, right, I don't know
drugs. I've never seen drugs.Oh god, I don't know. Maybe

(40:37):
the last thing he took was thecocaine. Yeah, all right, Well,
if I'm planning on going to amusic festival, eighty seven percent of
the people who are say they alsoplan to take drugs. Eighty seven number.
Marijuana is the most popular drug,So okay, include marijuana. That's
still not nine out of ten people. Yeah, that's followed by cocaine and

(40:59):
psychede des. The top three musicfestivals for drug use are rock Fest in
Wisconsin, Burning Man, Yeah,and Coachella. Three out of five purchase
their drugs at the festival, likethey're not bringing them with it. That's
a bad idea, yeah, becauseyeah, you don't have like I mean,
if you are going to do drugstest strips. Yeah, I'll make

(41:20):
the numbers up. Those are justthe numbers as the report are. Out
of all the festivals I go to, I don't see people openly using drugs
like that. And I go toareas where there's like, you know,
no security. And then it hasbeen to some music festivals, quite a
few. Yeah, he's been.He's been to a couple. Well,
he's very young, It's okay,it makes sense. Yeah, all right,
Well, Jasmine Are you ready toplay the duy Q? Yeah,

(41:43):
you're killing me. I'm ready,alrighty. Question number one, here we
go. Complete the line A roseby any other name would smell as what?
Okay, do what? What?The line A rose by any other
name would smell as what? Roseby any other name? I don't know

(42:04):
this, no, this is theparaphrase. Line of course, would smell
as what? All right? Uh? Triple no? Yeah, I agree.
Let's start with a triple no.Do you know Craig, Yes you
do? NEI yeah, graduated highschool? Did we learn this in high
school? I'd be probably not middleschool, probably high school. Yeah,

(42:28):
all right? What about you?Menaced Sammy? What do you think?
No? No, yeah, I'lltriple no, triple sweep it for trips?
No? All right, Jasmine,are you awake? Yeah? Okay,
all right, good, all right? So what do you think?
Question number one? Do you thinkthat Larry's going to get it? I'm

(42:51):
assuming so you think he will getit? Okay? This is what?
This is a lot of faith insomeone who's on a lot of drugs.
Okay, all right. Question numberone for the d u i Q,
complete the line a rose by anyother name would smell as what menace garlic

(43:13):
garlic if you changed the name ofgarlic. Yeah, all right, Sammy,
sweet sweet, there's the correct answer. Okay, that sounds somewhat familiar
Romeo and Julia. Yeah, surprisedyou. This is this is a line
spoken by Juliet to Romeo. Nicelike change your name, Romeo. I
saw the Leonardo DiCaprio version. Yeah. There. Never read the book,

(43:37):
the play, the play, whatever, whatever. I think. I'd rather
go to prison than reach Shakespeare.You would be alright, Let's see if
our friend, Jasmine here is onthe board. She said, yes,
that Larry would know the answer toquestion number one. Complete the line a

(43:58):
rose by any other name? Wuswell as what flower? Are your fan?
Of roses? Your your favorite?My friend actually wants to give me
black roses they were like painted,but then appriend that you can actually get
black roses, but I don't knowwhere. Yeah, all right, you
missed that one. This is whywe have three questions, though, Jasmine,
so you can rally on these nextto get him right and be the

(44:20):
winner of this round of the dU I Q. Okay, all right,
here we go. Question number twoin what city is the TV?
Show the office based Oh easy.I mean, let's see, well,
yeah, Larry is gonna get it. Larry. I'll have faith in Larry

(44:42):
on this one. No, Iwon't never mind, I want to.
I think maybe if he was sober, I don't be able to get it.
But I think that uh hmmut tosweep it. For yes too,
I'm gonna say no. It isbased on MENACE's body language right now.
I don't think Menace no, no, and I'm pretty sure Sammy does know
it. So I'll say no forLarry, No for Menace, yes for

(45:07):
Sammy. What says you? Rave? I like those answers. Those are
good, okay, Greg Gory,Uh no for Larry that I'm confident with.
Let's say yeah, let's say noto me, all right? So
same as you guys Menace and Sammy. Do you think that Larry will get
it? Yes? Raby, I'msorry. Sammy says yes, Menace says

(45:31):
no. Jazz, what do yousay? That's what matters? It,
says you. All right, Christturn your radio down, radio down,
energy up? Please? What whatwhat do you got? She's listening to

(45:52):
the radio. She said, no, no, okay, you got to
turn your radio down. There's abig delay just in case anybody swears you
can jump out of it. Butit's not going to help you. It's
not going to help you, allright, So you're saying no that Larry
won't know. Let's find out withSammy Menace here. First question number two
in what city is the TV showThe Office based Menace? Scran Pennsylvania?

(46:15):
What is it? Scratton, Pennsylvania, Scratton so close Scranton, Scranton,
Scratton? And is your favorite letter? And you left it out right?
You usually love to put ends andstuff. Yeah, the one chance you
could have thrown a random end inthere and it would have benefited you.

(46:37):
Pennsylvania, Scranton, Scranton, Scranton, Scranton, almost like scram but Scrann
Scranton, Scranton. They only sayit five thousand times during the right all
right. Question number two for thed U i Q in what city is
the TV show The Office based NewYork? And who's your favorite character on

(46:59):
the off? Steve Stive? What'shis name? Stif something? Steve Something?
All right? All right, well, Jasmin, that's good news,
Jasmine. You're on the board.You've got a point. You're on the
d u i Q. Now,if you get this one right, you're
the winner. But if not,this is a bank or break, So
if you don't get it, that'sit. Game over. Question number three,
if you drive up and down thep H. That's short for what

(47:22):
three words? All right? Ohman? Where where was this? Question?
Asked? Where were you? LasVegas? Las Vegas? I will
say no. I'm gonna say becauseof that, I will say no for
Larry yes to Menace and Sammy.I agree, Greg Gordon, you know

(47:43):
I like to get crazy. Areyou ready to do it? Yeah?
Triple yes. God, I'm goinginsane. What forget jail? Greg,
you go to the nuthouse. Right, I'm gonna be committed. All right,

(48:05):
Menace and Sammy, what do youthink? No? No way?
No, alright, make or breakhere? Jasmine, what do you think?
So? No? Alright? Alright, alright. Somebody in the text
said, I think this is thefirst time I'm rooting against the part looks.
Don't blame her, blame Morgan.All right. Question number three for

(48:25):
the d u i Q, ifyou drive up and down the pH that's
short for what three words? Sammy, Pacific Coast Highway. Menace Sammy is
correct, alright, is that whatyou wrote down? Yeah, alright,
Pacific Coast Highway. They both arecorrect on that one. All right.
So Jasmine said no, And ifLarry does not get this one, she
will be the winner of the du i Q. And you want to

(48:47):
get crazy, wait till you hearher reaction if she wins something grace herself.
Yeah, something tells me it's goingto be like a like a like
a wind tunnel right to the face. You're gonna get blown away by all
that, or here we go.If you drive up and down the PCH
that's short for what three words say? Fake highway? That's the middle one,

(49:09):
Hey, p paca fake California Highway. So Jasmine Pride coming right at
you. Wow, yeah yeah,Jaspace, Hell yeah, Jasmine, you're

(49:35):
the winner of the d u IQ. Look, I'm conflicted. I love
you for listening in the show,I really do. And I'm sure you're
a very nice person. I justdon't know what's going on with you,
like you you're liking a coma.I'm taly right now, I'm fairly driving
on a freeway. I'm driving onthe freeway, all right, all right,

(49:57):
Well, Jasmine, hang on onesecond, we'll get on your have
a great weekend. You guys knowwhen you drive your mouth stop fortune appreciate
this in the Woodies Show, stopwork. Yeah, I'm just thinking like,
if you know you're that compromised,it might not be the best time
to try to call it. Maybeit's many of the estates, so much
frame power to be all right,Well, okay, we already just got

(50:21):
a winner out of that one.Okay, where are you going from?
Hello? What's what's happening? Weneed to just pick this show back up.
Okay, Well, you're in luckgravy because coming up next on the
Woody Show, we've got a roundof the Friday Dad jokes. That'll help.
That is always what is needed.The doctor has ordered some dad jokes.
If you got a good one forus, go ahead and give us

(50:43):
a call. Phones are now openeight seven seven forty four Woodie. We're
asking for that Friday energy. Wewonder if Jasmine has a that joke would
be great. Yeah, oh mygod, please say it is just yeah
yeah, Jasmine, Hi, Jasmine, do you have a dad joke for
us? Do you know a gooddad joke? Do I know a good

(51:05):
dad joke. Yeah, oh,let's see. I mean I could always
told like the one, I alwaysknow what's that? What's that one?
Yeah? Yeah, well how's itgo? Joke? That would I would

(51:27):
say, alright, thank you,Jasmine. All right, so I've got
a good dad joke. Eight sevenseven, Hang on, she's fun at
party? Eight seven seven for thetext on eighty seven. This is it
as bad like a boom boom.All right, welcome back Friday morning,

(51:51):
everybody, you go all right,trying to recover from all that energy in
the d U y Q. Yeah, the round of some Friday dad jokes.
Eat seven seven food. Let's eatseven seven forty four woody, and
let's go right to the phones andsay hi to Amber. Good morning,

(52:14):
Good morning, longtime listener, firsttime Paul. All right, so what's
your what's your dad joke? Okay, Why can't Helen Keller drive a car?
Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Why? Because she's dead?
Gonna? I was expecting more oflike a Harrison Butker. All right,

(52:37):
Amber, thank you for the call, appreciate you listen to what show,
have yourself great weekend. Let's goto Kathy. Good morning, Kathy,
Kathy, Good morning, waity show. Good morning, Friday, dad joke?
What do you got? What isa battery and a butthole have in
common? What is a battery anda butthole have in common? What you

(52:59):
know? You're not supposed to putyour tongue on it, but you do
it anyway? Wow, tossing salad? All right? Thank you, Kathy,
Bye bye, bye bye. Let'sgo to Brandon. Good morning,
Brandon, Brandon, good morning.What do you show? Would be Friday

(53:20):
to you? All right? SoFriday dad joke? What do you got?
What do you call a hen?Which letitoes are? What do you
call a hen with lettuce in itseye? That's right? What's that?
It's a chicken season challenge? Allright, Brandon, thank you for the

(53:44):
call. What do you call asnowman with a six pack? What do
you call a snowman with a sixpack? What an abdominal snowman? Why
did the hipster burn his tongue onhis coffee? Why because he drank it
before it was cool getting it?See best, you have a good one

(54:07):
for us. Let's go some yourmama jokes? All right? Your mama
so fat? When she went toschool, she sat beside, everybody got
eight seven seven that's eight seven sevenforty four? Whatdy? Back to the
phones we go. Let's go toPhil here. Hey, good morning show,
Hey, good morning. What doyou show? Good morning? All

(54:28):
right? Friday dad joke? Whatdo you got? Did you know that
diarrhea is hereditary? It is?Yeah, it runs in your jeans?
All right, Phil, thank youfor the call. Let's go to Joe.
Good morning joke. Hey, goodmorning guys. How you doing.
We're doing great? Friday dad jokes. What do you got? What do

(54:52):
you call it when you put yourpants on at the farm? What do
you call it when you put yourpants on? Pants on at the farm?
What ranch dressing? All right?This one? What do you call
potato? Who procrastinates? What ahesitator? That's really likes? Yeah?

(55:15):
What have you tried the seafood diet? Have I tried the seafood diet?
No? I haven't mass eat justseafood and then you eat it. You
know what? I think I havethe sea bess. You got one for
us? Your mama. Your mama'sso fat when it's a full moon,
she turns into a warehouse. Uh, Sammy enlightened us with the dad joke?

(55:38):
Why did the coach go to thebank. Why the coach go to
the bank to get his quarterback?Why? How does dark Vader like his
toast hell on the Dark Side?Star Wars? How about this one off
the text? Three guys walking toa bar? I mean at least one
of them should have seen it?What generation is Tom Hanks? Last five?

(56:02):
Two? Jen a Jordan from Wisconsin? He's got one. Did you
hear about the boar? Sorry aboutDid you hear about the boy born with
out eyelets? No? Yeah,the boy who was born with that eyelids?

(56:22):
The doctors used some kind of foreskinto create them for him. He's
fine now, just a little cockeyed get a eventually got there? Great
gory. Do you have a gooddad joke? Yeah? What do Alexander
the Great, Winnie the Pooh,and Chance the Rapper have in common?
What's that same middle name yetto Let'ssee. Let's go to Bamb. Good

(56:46):
morning, Bamb? Sorry about yourmom? Good morning? Good morning?
All right? So what your what'syour dad joke? How can you tell
how heavy a red hot chili pepperis? How can you tell how heavy
a red hot chili pepper? Howgive it away, Give it away,
Give it away, now, giveit away? Got it? I like

(57:07):
it? All right. Let's goto Brian. Good morning, Brian's Yes,
Brian, what's your dad joke?Why can't you hear pterodactal use the
bathroom? Why can't you hear thepterodactyl use the bathroom? Why I can't
hear it? Because of the peacesilent? It's because never mind, never

(57:32):
mind on that, Brian, Thankyou for the call. Yes, mate,
I got it. What did thegrapes say when it got stepped on?
What? Nothing? It just leftit just let out a little wine.
Ray nothing, It just uh letout a little wine. Yeah see

(57:52):
yeah, yeah, yeah, gettingyou. Guys. Just went to a
lecture about lamps. Yeah, Ithought, don't be boring, but it
was very illuminating. This one fromthe four oh four? Why can't a
leopard hide because he's always spotted?Yeah? Yeah, dude, I wish

(58:13):
my gray hair started in Las Vegas. Oh yeah, because what happens in
Vegas stays in Vegas. What doyou know that I'm sorry and I apologize
mean the same thing they do unlessyou're at a funeral. Let's go to
Leah. Good morning, Leah Leah, good morning, good morning. All
right, So what's your dad joke? What kind of shoes do frogs wear?

(58:37):
What kind of shoes? Excited interruptthat's right, that's right, it's
still good. It's still good.Well, Leah, thank you. I
appreciates great weekend. All right.Uh, dude, my dad was crying

(58:58):
last night while cutting up onions.Onions. Such a good dog dark You
like that one? Right? No, it seems to be run up your
alley. That's kind of easy.Okay, but your mama jokes? What
do yeah? What do you gotover there? You go, braby?
Yeah, your mama is so fatat Hogwarts she got sorted into the waffle

(59:20):
house. Yeah I got one.Yeah, yeah. What do you call
a line of men waiting for haircuts? What a barbecue? A barbeque?
Yeah, he's not good at pronouncibarbecue, Barbara barber, so it'll be
a barbecue barber barbecue. That's whatI said. Yeah, sure, let's

(59:43):
go to sky. Hey, goodmorning, Scotty, Hey, good morning.
What are you are you? We'redoing great? What's your dad joke?
All right? You go a littlebit of imagination here, Okay,
so what imagine a bus stop?What did the sushi roll sitting at the
bus stop say to the bee whenhe rolled up? Say to the what
be say to the bee? Thebumble bee? What did the sushi rolls

(01:00:05):
say to the bumble bee at theat the bus stop? What? What
SAB's beginning? There has to bejustin. You guys aren't gidding? Sob
hey, justin? Hey? Whatyou want to hear a ghost joke?

(01:00:29):
Sure of course that's the spirit?Yes, all right? How about this
one? What do you get ifyou watch a Jackie Chan movie backwards?
A movie about a guy who canassemble furniture with his feet? All right,
right? He asked? How oftendo chemists go to work periodically?

(01:00:58):
Was supposed to surprise you? Yeah? What's a karate expert's favorite beverage?
Hung flu karate question? How doyou make an octopus laugh with ten tickles?
That's all right, Taylor, that'show you do it? Hi,

(01:01:22):
Taylor? How are you? Hi? Taylor? I'm great? What is
your dad joke? Why did thetri serratops go to the ear? Why
did the try sarrahtops go to thee r? Why he had a dinosaur?
Ah, he's got a sword?Yeah, Taylor? Thank you for

(01:01:44):
the call. How about this one? Bed Harrison Butker texting over what's the
difference between a woman and a magnet? What? Harrison? Magnet has a
positive side? That was very redneckwhen be complaining, Yeah, what's a
medical instrument you find in the bathroom? What's that a tuba toothpaste? Tuba

(01:02:08):
toothpast? Why would it be amedical instrument? I didn't say musical music.
That's a great way to end it. It's a great way, I
think. I think that's where weended. What. Yeah, there's a
Friday and Dad jokes everybody, there'sa natural end of things, and then

(01:02:32):
there's that the witty show. We'llbe back in this show, the show.
I got a text your nine tofive one says I love how chaotic
this Friday is going gold? Acouple left over Dad jokes nine nine.

(01:02:55):
I was in a queue with adad joke, but I didn't get on
the air. What do you calla dinosaur that uses cheap toilet paper?
What? I'm megasaurs? Why doesno one like Jesus' aunt? Why?
Because she's the anti Christ? Whatcolor is the wind? What blue?

(01:03:23):
How about this one? New YorkCity's Mayor Eric Adams. He suggested immigrants
as a possible solution to the city'slifeguard shorge because he said they're excellent swimmers.
Oh wait, that's not a joke. He actually said that, dude,
what are you doing? Like youmight be able to get away that

(01:03:46):
as a mayor in some cities.You're New York City, man, what
do you what are you doing?The most diverse he is in America the
world. It was a briefing andtalking about, you know, the lifeguard
staffing shortage or whatever, because youknow, Memorial Day is coming up,
and he said, hey, wecould expedite these work licenses for migrants and
asylum seekers. You know, quote, how do we have a large body

(01:04:08):
of people that are in our city, in our country that are excellent swimmers?
Wow? And at the same timewe need lifeguards and the only obstacle
is that we won't give them theright to work to become a lifeguard.
Ran though, now I could seewhat he's saying, like, hey,
maybe there are some people who actuallyhave a skill set. He wasn't saying
because they're immigrants, they're really goodat swimming. But you could see where

(01:04:30):
that looks really funny in print.Yeah, absolutely. That's what they always
say to people who are, youknow, in our positions on the radio,
Like you always have to think,sure if they took that one piece?
Yeah, and like whatever you said, if it was in print,
how would it look? Yeah,it doesn't look great in print? Wor
Yeah. Look, personally, Idon't care what you say. You could
say whatever the hell you want.Don't care. Don't care about this,

(01:04:51):
don't care about what Harrison Bucker said, don't care. People could say whatever
they want. You can agree withit, disagree with it, but you
know, don't let it get youtoo worked up. But if I'm the
mayor of New York City, I'mprobably making a different decision, that's all.
Yeah, And you might plan outwhat you say, all right,
eight seven seven forty four, WoodyFriday, check in, send those on
the text over to two two nineeight seven, and we are into another

(01:05:20):
new hour in sensitivity training for apolitically correct world. It's Friday morning.
Yeah, May seventeenth, twenty twentyfour, Woody, Ravy Gray, Minnie
Sea Bass. There's Sammy Morgan ishere. Good Moran, Good Morgan to
you, Von our video producer.We got bored, We got Caroline phones

(01:05:41):
are open. Eighty seven seven fortyfour, Woody, that's an eight seven
seven forty four Wooding. I heardsomething, Morgan. You went to a
Korean barbecue place and you didn't likeit. No, I fucked it.
Oh because somebody told me that youdidn't like it because it took too long.
Oh no, we agree, SoWaury and I were talking about We
agree. It's I'm gonna say,Korean barbecue way too long. Right.

(01:06:06):
The only reason I wouldn't like it, and I go on Saturdays usually is
because you got to wait like anhour to even sit down. Yeah,
so packed. However, this lasttime I went, there was no way
but the process itself. You don't, you know, like you don't like
the it takes forever, like cookingyour own stuff. Well, I like
it because I go with friends whocook for me. So no, I

(01:06:27):
don't like cooking it, but thankfullyI'm with people that like. For folks
who've never been, can you describethese setup men us? Well, first
you wait an hour, which Gregwould love you get to see because every
Korean barbecue spot is always packed.Yeah, matter because it's good. Yeah,
and it's like groups of like fifteenpeople too. Yeah, and then
you sit down at the table andthere's like a little grill and they'll bring

(01:06:51):
you while you order your your plateto meat, which different pieces of meat
that you want, and then they'llbring it by and then you cook yourself
on the grill. Yeah. Andso you get a little tiny piece of
meat after waiting an hour, yougrill it yourself, which takes a while.
Then you eat it. Then youhave to wait another fifteen to twenty

(01:07:13):
minutes before they bring buy another plate, and then you cook. You bring
any one little piece of meat.If you're a group of fifteen people,
like you're getting like a sice ofmeat every twenty minutes. Yeah, it
takes to It's great. I wouldnever go there with a giant group of
people. I would go there withlike maybe one or two Fox four Max,

(01:07:34):
Yeah, Max, I go ina group of four and it's perfect.
However, it's so busy that Menaceis right. It takes the server
forever to come back and bring youyour next thing, a brisket or whatever,
you know. So I love theKorean barbecue. The other thing that
I don't think Menace would have thepatience for sea bass. Certainly, my
wife and I love going to themelting pot, which is that place where

(01:07:55):
it's the fondue place. Favorite lovethat place. You know why because it
is a nice sl low, relaxing, like we actually have time to sit
and talk because you know, uh, during the week or you know,
our regular dinners together, like it'sin between kids activities and I'm trying to
get work done. She's got thisother stuff going on, so like we're
scarfing food trying to get the kidsout of the table the same time,

(01:08:17):
Like can we just sit and havelike one meal together. Someone's finishing homework
and the other person's may be offat their activity still, so we just
like that nice chill and you're cookingand you're cooking that one by the time.
Yeah, polase explain it to bemore because we actually we've gone to
the melting pot together, but onlydessert. Yeah that was easy because romantic

(01:08:40):
pot. Yeah, faster though,because you could put four or five six
years into the bowl of broth trueor oil stuffed after. But if you
go to Korean barbecue, it's justone other person. That's plenty of fine.
I mean, yeah, you cando multiple things at the same They
do take a while to bring outthe meats though, even when you have
a smaller right crowd. But Imean it is all you can eat most

(01:09:03):
places right the place, I imagine, yeah, still picturing menace of what
are you sitting together at the meltingcross forks or whatever? You know?
We were. We were out oftown for some business thing. We were
walking by, like melting pot thereto dip stuff and chocolate. As a

(01:09:24):
man, I can't see going intoa melting pot another man, that's gay,
right right? Manly designed a roman. I thought you were a man
of the modern time. Go toa bar. Bro brought out the melting
which, by the way, wedid sit at the bar. There's that,

(01:09:45):
yeah, the other businessman. Imagineyour straw even brownies and OK,
thank you. We didn't share that. We crossed spoons. Just recently we
did that dessert together. We didthat was it was like a peanut butter
pie thing. I don't remember.I don't think I've ever been in a

(01:10:06):
meal. We're at that Italian spotwhen we crossed spoons. I never had
a dessert with other man. Ohmy god, imagine the nightmare if somebody
thought, oh my god, whatabout sharing a dessert and maybe your knees
touched. Oh my god, Yeah, there's nothing more homosexual. But you
know you would probably be in theclears if like before the dessert got there,

(01:10:27):
you very clearly stood up on thechair and declared no home over you
gotta do. Look, we're gonnashare this dessert, but we're not homosexual,
just like to let everybody know astranger. It was slamming last name
with as far as to say,ordering dessert as a man is almost gay?

(01:10:48):
What ordering a desserts Now, you'regone way too far. What you
would never order a lava cake?That's how hetero dessert seems, like,
like Greg like a cat's are girls? Right? Yea, cats are girls.
I think dessert is for girls.I mean a cat a pet for
a girl. You eat so muchcake sea bats when it comes in here

(01:11:11):
on, so you basically have avagiant. It's a different scenario. It's
not like there's a whole meal andthen there's cake at the end that cakes
the only thing here. Cakes theonly food. So it's mainly to eat
it all day, but curly toorder it after a meal. That's what
I'm saying. Would you go togrocery store and buy a cake or is
that too girly. I've never hadmy life ever, I've never bought.

(01:11:34):
You could go to my house,there's no ready if you were in the
house recently thanks to my great generosity, I was. You know, you
didn't look in the kitchen or thenthe fridge. But there's no cakes,
no cookies, no desserts around here. Most people don't have. But I
wouldn't eat them at all if theyweren't, if they weren't here, just
presented, you know, good womenand children. Sorry, or that's an

(01:11:56):
interesting take ordering dessert a restaurant.I've heard a lot. I've not I've
not heard that in her argument,I was not gonna say yay. I'll
just say feminine about that. Yes, Karen sends us an email Karen Bessie
subject Sea Bass's party. Oh yeah, yeah, would you like to come?

(01:12:19):
She can come to the next one. I'm listening to the podcast.
I was Sea Bass so upset thatwith everyone not going to his party.
But he says it shows him whocares and who doesn't. But did he
not recently say that if he wasno longer working on the show, that
he would not keep in touch withanyone because he didn't count anyone in the
show as a friend. He's ahypocrite, bitch strong statement. I didn't

(01:12:46):
say friends, I said, butI did say I was friend lee with
everyone here. Yeah, and Iwent out of my way to do a
nice thing for all of us,which Raby saw. She was evenly there
for half of it, and shesaid it was fantastic. It's fantastic.
Stick as the first one, andI went to and I told you it
was lovely. What He's in thebottom of my band list. He's still
on it, but he's I thinkit's just a mask. It just shows

(01:13:10):
them. It's just a low efforthit a bunch of hypocrites here. Okay,
okay, And we now know thatdessert is gay. Oh wow,
says he want that back. Hesaid, it's feedtament. You can hit
us up. Of the texts COVIDat two to nine eight seven more what

(01:13:33):
he shows next. This is theWoody shows. Somebody on the text had
a really good idea we really need, you know, like Ravey's questions of
the Fellas. Yeah, Greg's questionsfor headeros. Ye, Sea Bats should

(01:13:57):
really do a whole segment on rulesfor headeros, Like you know, like,
what's gay? What's not? Youmight just so we know, yeah,
you might be unintentionally intentially making amistake, you know, right,
because medicinie nightmare medicine. We sharedthat dessert. Yeah, not only not

(01:14:18):
only shared a dessert, shared afun dude, Yeah, okay fun and
into which Sea Bass then turned aroundand said that ordering desserts are gay.
Yeah, said we were homosexual.Yeah, so great fitting. Yes,
Greg, since you are gay,we figured that you are the you got

(01:14:40):
to be the the authority on this. Thank you. And I also made
my own list of random Yeah Ieven think seemed kind of gay. Yeah
yeah, so Sea Bass, whatdo you what do you say about the
dessert? About the said have somerules, okay, rules for heateros like
don't order dessert right, don't orderdesserts as a man if there are options.

(01:15:01):
Do not order any kind of whiteclaw, you know, if you're
at a party or whatever. Ohwe got I see all the white claws
or behind the bar they have youknow, they have cans of seltzer and
mixed cocktail, mixed drink vodka beer. So no seltzer's at all, like
a truly you could have one?Yeah, I can't order a white cloud.

(01:15:21):
I would have to order like avodka soda, like a cocktail,
right, or if you're out inpublic, yeah you wouldn't. But just
not a vodka cocktail like in acan, right? Not? Got it?
Not at all? All right,I'm making Yeah, you know,
you don't want to do the wrongthing. I don't want anybody to confuse
me. You want to be athousand percent like me. This is not
there's anything wrong with me. Whatelse? I'm just saying, if you
want to be on this side ofthe spectrum, what else? Never?

(01:15:44):
Never initiate a hug. Oh wow, it's you know, unless you're at
a funeral basically, or it's longerthan let's say, two or three years.
Wow. Like I know men whoare like they didn't see it.
So I guys three days ago andthey went for what is that? How
are you doing? Hug? Oh? God, chests are all touching?

(01:16:04):
Got all right? Got another onethat's good for now? Okay. Not
don't drive a Miata. Uh yeah, there's a lot of car based ones
that I don't really want. I'mnot a car person, so I don't
care. That A great question.But about using a straw like, so
like when they bring very good one. Let's say that you like you've ordered,
You've ordered a diet a diet coke, right, and the and the

(01:16:25):
wind water says, would you likea straw? And I go sure,
Well, some say even ordering adiet coke, let's stick with the straw
question. I think you know whatI'm I'm ruling no, that's not okay.
But it is childish that you can'tdrink without a straw. It's not
okay. The ice just gets inthe way. You know, it's not
gay, but it's also not onethousand percent hetero. So I would say

(01:16:46):
no straws. I gotta go withGreg's opinion this cut. What about like,
uh, somebody text over the underwearaisle underwear aisle. What about like
if you're at the store the underwearaisle, Well, you're a straight dude
to your bro and you go intothe underwear eye of browsing because there's pictures
of guys in you're in the men'sunderwear. You know, the underwear aisle

(01:17:08):
is definitely a place where if you'reyou know, questioning, you're on the
fence. Got it? That willturn you gain got it? Under Another
question on the text sitting next toyour friend of the movies with no empty
seat between you. If there isspace, then you should have the buffer
seat. That's that's an oldie,that's what you would I thought that was
only for urinals when you go intothe public. Would you want to intentionally

(01:17:30):
rub shoulders with the guy. I'mnot really rubbing. I'm not putting here's
the thing. I'm not putting thearm rest up, you know, but
just making into the seat. Youshould have manly broad shoulders. Well,
the last time I went to themovies with Woody there was those huge client
seats. Different next week eventually endedup in the same seat over the pants.

(01:17:55):
Right, I have a long listof things that you might think are
gay, I think are slightly gay. Well, you mentioned weddings, cats
and weddings. Cats and weddings incrediblygay. There's nothing gayer than a cat.
This sand represents my family, andthis sand represents your family. We're
going to pour them into the samevas right, Like, yeah, you're

(01:18:16):
kind of talking about are you justtalking about? Like there's so much like
flowers everywhere and harps. Harps aregay on my list. I have bookends,
Like if you do something just tohold the book up right, like
you've got rocks, you've got you'vegot bottles. You probably have an extra

(01:18:38):
freeway from your gym empty bottle.Or you can just take the next book
and put it on. Yeah,I would say go out and buy books.
I've always argued, like eating abanana, there's no way to look
manly eating a banana, right,I guess, so then you can put
a hot dog on that list.And I know it's just the way you

(01:19:00):
eat a banana straight up and downand you're like same, but you could
eat just to let anyone see you. And also when you're peeling, it
kind of looks like someone like whena chick is like, you know,
a house cleaning your your unit beforeshe does her thing. Okay, Okay,
I've heard that. I mean yeah, I mean it's it's a little
too obvious though, Okay, allright, I think Hawaiian shirts are gay.

(01:19:20):
Depends on the situation. Are youin Hawaii? No? It also
falls into fat party guy mode,right, which is the opposite of gay.
Okay, this one's way too obvious. Portraits of fruit or still lives
like you have a painting of abowl of cherries I would say most art
is gay general, unless it's likethe King Charles portraits, as you know,

(01:19:46):
like the thing that whatever got thehymn the Horse with an Animal hardcore.
Also on my list fountains. Ithink fountains seem gay. They're like
a water feature. Yeah right,that's interesting to somebody's house inn. On
one hand, it's like very Louisthe fourteenth. But on the other hand,

(01:20:06):
I would say, like a birdbat certainly gay. Oh open face
sandwiches, Open face sandwiches does it'svery that's very brunch. I would have
never thought about that, right,But it's like you're talking about avocado avocado
toast. I mean, I likethem, this is this is your community.
I'm not going to question your decisionhere, but I would make an

(01:20:28):
argument for the open face sandwich.I don't know. And coodn't books definitely,
Like you can just wing it orlook it up on the But if
you have a book, I havelike twenty of them, all right.
What about cures and I have aFountain Eggs? Yeah? No, like
if you have a cureg machine,No, I don't. I don't think
that's getting No, Like, shouldn'tyou just have like a coffee pot.

(01:20:50):
Yeah, I'm with Woody on thatone. Really really yeah, I'm just
asking him taking taking I'm taking someoff the off the text here, Okay,
we're just trying to learn this.We're trying to learn here. Here's
okay, here's what I have both. Here's a budtle, here's a buddle.
Getting a straw with the drink isokay because there could be germs on
cans or glasses. Caring about germsis gay? Yeah, yeah, germs,

(01:21:21):
Sorry, he says. The guywho watches his shoes every day going
back to footwear is another one onthe text. Boots, boots, what
about them? That like, Well, it depends on if you're working with
leather shorts, then that's different.Right, it depends Well, I mean,
okay, are you a cowboy?If not, right, I wouldn't

(01:21:41):
say boots are gay. I wouldsay being excited about boots. Yes,
I mean it's fall I can puton my boots. You know. Seven
one four says certainly, never showyour feelings. That's gay. Showing emotion.
Yeah, I agree with that.Yeah, unless someone's dead. Back
to the funeral, A couple ofthings are acceptable the funerals, right,
right, Greg, Well, youknow I disagree with that, but you've

(01:22:03):
never seen your dad cry? Right, I don't think so, because he's
I've never seen, I never seen. Yeah, even as he got older.
Actually agree, because yeah, that'sthe thing that happens a lot of
men. If the guys start cryingmore than get older. Estrogen what he
knows. Yeah, my dad didn'teven cry his own mom's funerals. So
but the feelings thing, I knowthat. I learned that from Ravey because

(01:22:24):
that's your biggest pet peeve men withfeelings? Yeah, about stupid stuff.
I'm so I'm still laughing about fountains. Fountains, that's so funny. I
do have a fountain about public fountains? Are they? Here's modifying it to
bird baths. That's fair, right, because a lot of those fountains are

(01:22:44):
like that's a lot of emperors putthat up to as a demonstration of how
powerful and rich they are. Fountainbrought the Trevy fountain sculptures. Yeah,
I'm this might hit home. Butwhat about bird feeders? Okay, yeah,
that's what I think of that asan old man hobby hold on different
hummingbird feeders. Gay regular like ahouse that you built by yourself. That's

(01:23:10):
this man and hummingbird built the birdhouse, right, yeah, yeah,
or it has to be like andyou got to add to that, not
from a kid either. Oh yeah, you're saying, get the raw materials,
your own wood. Yeah, youcut that up in your garage,
your crap. Yeah, what aboutcarrying a water bottle? Oh? Mega,

(01:23:33):
gay, I'm not asking you.I'm gotta go to Greg on this
one first, because that that thewoman brought that up a while ago,
right, she said, guys whocan carry on so it's incredibly feminine.
I saw one he had. Isaw a guy the other day he had
one hooked to his belt, Like, oh yeah, forget as we've talked
about practical fifty years ago were peopledying a third it was hooked to his

(01:23:55):
belt with a caribbeane. Or doesthat make it a makes it? By
the way, somebody else said,going on a hike, Like if you
got another hike with a dude,I say, yeah, if it's a
hike for no po like hunting,obviously different going on a hike. Going
on hiking for a purpose to getsomebody to do something manly different. I
could be swayed that that seems slightlygood. All right, Another good question
on the text. I'm ordering apair of shorts, what is the minimum

(01:24:20):
en scene? I can order fiveseven nine? Okay at length? Right?
Yeah, so the end seems likefive seven nine and it depends on
what Yeah, come back your kneeor beyond beyond to be header. Well,
there's a lot of like look atyou know, very headro It was

(01:24:42):
just the style at the time.Were sure? I mean, I think
there're a question. I mean wecould say, you know, you can
make your argument today, but backin this, you know, Bruce Jenner
was the was that's true hit ofme of masculinity, and that was just
the style. Real short. Whatdo you think? No minim them?
Mm hmm five five five or nuthuggers. The question is why? And

(01:25:06):
if you're famous, you can wearanything, right, question why do you
need them to be short? Well, because they're shorts. Why you need
why do you need long shorts?Right? But I agree, why do
you need it that close to yoursack? Yeah? I don't know,
maybe like the huge the hug ofit, you know, if your calves,
I don't know. Let's go withnine then nine? Sure, Okay,

(01:25:28):
that's minimum nine nine is like theprobably the one of the longer,
the ones that you know that's probablyto the almost right. What about fanny
packs? Mmm, I think anykind of bag though, right, But
yeah, but that we were carryingaround a bag, I hate that society
doesn't allow it. Well, yourphone, wallet, key, sunglasses,
and you got to put everything inyour pockets and it ruins your whole silhouett.

(01:25:49):
Yeah, but you think about likecool straight guys, right, Well,
for straight guys, put yourself inthe mind of a cool straight I
would think fanny packs are gay ora bag. Well, there's a way
to get around that. You justcaught tactical and make it like black and
rot on it. All. Right, Well, now that we have some
rules of the road, that's agood jumping off point. Where do you

(01:26:11):
draw the line at Starbucks? Uh? Nothing? General? You can get
a lot of crazy, a lotof like with whip and drizzle. And
you know what I would if you'rea man and you're ordering a complicated coffee
that's pretty gay, like just morea coffee. Yeah, nobody orders nothing
coffee, nothing with whipped cream onit. Oh really, No, I'm

(01:26:32):
asking is that, like, wherewould you draw the line I see,
I am a fan, though uhyeah, I'm gonna stick to it anything
more than just yes, I'll havea coffee. It's gay like if you're
doing half this, half that,half calf with whip and it's gotta be
it's gotta be hot though, rightto like, yeah, I would think
coffee. A lot of people inthe text on that one too. I

(01:26:56):
under understand why, but I'm I'mnot on board with that. And loading
on your list is umbrella. Bythe way, I am not using umbrella.
I've changed on that. Yeah,I mean like, it's got to
be it's gotta be. Yeah,it's got to be a certain it's got
to be a certain level of rain. I'm not. I'm not using an
umbrella for like a drizzle because tome, that's just more inconvenient than anything
else. I'm not worried about gettinga little little sprinkle. Okay, if

(01:27:18):
it's pooring, well then yeah,no problem. As a younger man would
have been caught dead with an umbrella. But I've grown and I do plenty
of I share desserts with menace.I rear desserts. So according to this,
to Sea Bass, you and Ishould be married something spectrum. Yeah,
sure is. Yeah. But forthe guys out there who this is
really important too. I think thiswas a very educational, very insightful segment.

(01:27:39):
You might be doing something you didn'trealize right accidentally show. I don't
know. I can't predict the future, but maybe it'll be something like yeah,
wow, it looks so much biggeror something much darker the show back

(01:28:00):
in the bit turn that bad assriad Now show what about escalators? Greg?
When there's stairs and escalators and they'reright next to each other. Well,
you know, it's always been apet peews of mind when people stand
on escalators, like are you lazy? Especially escalator? Yeah? Ruling on

(01:28:25):
escalators like probably not kidding. Thisone says. This segment reminds me of
these videos this be a Man guythat's on the Instagram. Dude, I
was telling you about this guy acouple of years ago when I when I
found this, I was laughing myass off. Dude from Massachusetts, just
be a man, at be aman, and he had falls right in
the line with what we're talking abouthere. Here we go. Don't your

(01:28:46):
organs when you're alive a man?Yeah? Yeah, that's how you're really
a man. You donate your organswhen you're still alive, you could be
a man? Right? Uh right? How about how about this one?
When you come home Wait after anight of drinking so loud you wake up
the whole house. Yeah, bea man, Be a man. Or

(01:29:15):
this dude, this guy has madeso much money doing this account. He
doesn't ben There's a book, he'sgot merch, he's got all kinds of
stuff. Yeah, when you meetsomeone, shake their hand and try to
break it. Amen, I meanthere's a there's a ton of them.
He's been doing it for years now, so many of these things. Wow,

(01:29:39):
I like this one. If youtell your kids to clean up their
toys and they don't throw all thisaway? A man at be a man?
On Instagram you could. You cancheck it out there and if you
have any other questions for Greg,please feel free to send it over on
the text ongoing. Yeah, youknow, Greg and Sea Bass can get
together and really make a decision onit. Make that list. We're really

(01:30:00):
looking forward to uh Seabass's next party, if you know what I'm saying.
It's a big coming out party,getting get heading and we'll all go to
that one. I promise you seethat. No dessert though, yea,
even Greg will go to that one. Yeah, there will be no dessert
there because you know. Okay,show show next, they're back. Sit
on my face. It's the woodshown. Welcome back Friday morning. It

(01:30:25):
is the Woody Show. Ravey's gotnerd now cut up here. In just
a few moments latest in the worldof nerds. We'll find out what's happening
there. Also, the birthday isthe porno birthday? You're on the wood
shot. No Raby's big headline anduh, you know, I'm sorry to
mow your lawn here, Ray getit. She wouldn't cover this in a
millionaires. But the big news,it's the big news that everybody's talking about.

(01:30:46):
I guess yeah. Is it HappyGilmore Too? No, that's something
that Reevey would never cover. Okay, but that is official Happy Gilmore Too.
It's happening. Adams will be back. It's gonna be on Netflix,
Shooter McGavin. Y. Now here'sthe thing that the first film came out
in nineteen ninety six only made fortymillion dollars worldwide. Wow. Really,

(01:31:12):
yeah, I was surprised by thatbig movie. Everybody's seen it. And
even I saw that. Yeah,yeah, anyway, that's not the big
story. Okay. Soldier Boy hasapologized for ragging on metro Booman's mother and
has vowed to seek therapy. Ohthat's the big story. Yeah, I
don't know what to see. Thatmeans don't care. You don't know metro

(01:31:32):
booming. Nope, because I didhave the Happy Gilmore twos? Is that
a cell phone services? Yeah?What do you got? All? I
got Verizon T Mobile? Now Igot metro Booman. I missed this one
though, Yeah, you missed thatone. Yeah, that's a big producer.
All right, Ravy, do youhave this one south Park? Yes,
you got that one already. Allright, I'll let her cover that.

(01:31:54):
Let's see what else I might havePC News Harry shear m h yeah,
Thatsen's guy. Yeah. So hediscussed not being able to voice the
Black Simpsons character doctor Hibbert anymore.Can't do it? Are they all retiring
from? What was the thing thatyou said, Greg, You're there was
a headline? Oh yeah, kindof along the same line, kind of

(01:32:16):
along the same lines. There's thatmovie we mentioned recently called The Idea of
You. Now, he's not referringto that. But the star of that
movie is this guy who played agay royal, a gay British rule,
Nicholas Gallant. Gallant, he's inthat Red, White and Royal Blood,
that's the one, and he playsa gay guy. And he had this

(01:32:41):
headline I saw it on BuzzFeed saidhe feels guilty for quote taking up somebody's
space and he feels guilty playing LGBTQcharacters as a straight actor. Yeah,
that's your job is to act.And if you feel guilty about kicking up
the space of a game, thendon't right then say no, yeah,
but you did it. But you'rean actor, so kudos to you for

(01:33:04):
playing a gay guy. If you'renot gay, I guess job. He's
coming back for the sequel exactly whymoney Dump Truck, right, And do
you think he feels guilty? Yeah, but they're gonna have the DC police
on set, So yeah. Theredumb and uh politically incorrect news. Dame
Judy Dench thinks that if you needtrigger warnings, maybe you shouldn't go to

(01:33:25):
the theater. I love he's notwrong. Maybe you shouldn't just leave your
house. And I finally, incase you missed it, Disney has not
banished tinker Bell from their parks dueto wokeness. That was a weird rumor.
Yeah, that was going around fora minute Facebook. I don't know,

(01:33:46):
but the Disney saying no Disney Girl. Disney parks around the world,
tinker Bell is represented, and thepeople that were floating this for saying the
reasons were that she is not agood current day role model for young girls.
Yeah, the fake the fake newsheadlines are back on Facebook rampant.

(01:34:08):
They're getting all your parents riled up. But not to not to worry,
Disney has not banished tinker Bell fromthe parks. She's just jealous. She's
not anything crazy. I mean,like in the movie, like in terms
of a character, she's a veryjealous character. But that's it. Okay,
good to know. I had noidea. I thought she just kind
of like, no, she triedto like murder Wendy. She doesn't like

(01:34:32):
Wendy because Wendy kind of takes PeterPan from her, and she gets very
jealous, so she does things becauseof that bitch she shanked her. I
do not remember that. That ringdon't know. I don't remember that because
you're not watching Watch your Pan.When I was a little kid, and
I'm familiar with that story, right, you know you watched it last night,

(01:34:55):
But have you watched the things whereupon reflection, Uh, you see
that Peter Pan was actually the badguy in the movie. Oh yeah,
is that kind of like Daniel LaRussois the bad guy in the Karate Kid.
Yeah, if you if you reallybreak it down, Peter Pan was
the bad guy because he like guyand the kidnapped all these kids, took

(01:35:15):
them away. Yeah. Yeah,but for the right red he was on
the right side of history though,no, right wouldn't have let them grow
up? Yeah, going and flirtingwith all the mermaids. Yeah, take
a yeah, take a second lookat it. Man, I'd see what
else Raby has for us today.What he show presents nerd nut with Ravy
and what is happening in the worldof nerds. Well, I kind of

(01:35:38):
had this feeling because Paramount was holdingback the reviews for If. This new
movie written and directed by John Krasinski. He also plays the lead girl's dad.
Ryan Reynolds plays an adult who canalso see these imaginary friends that the
girls can see or that the girlcan see. So now it's in theaters
and I think this is gonna beone of those movies that critics and moviegoers
disagree on. The critics, I'mseeing a lot of this like IF is

(01:36:02):
a ripoff of Pixar movies. They'resaying, specifically the Toy Story movies,
and that IF like it. It'sa good idea, but it's not executed.
They're like saying it really falls short, like it doesn't have the magic
of the Pixar movies. Still trackingto make around forty million dollars, Hollywood
Reporter said it's easier to admire thanenjoy. It has a fifty eight percent

(01:36:27):
from critics on Rotten Tomatoes. NowSteve Garrell, he voices one of the
lead ifs, and he's been outand about doing interviews, and he confirmed
that Michael Scott is not going tobe involved in this new version of the
Office. I'm not sure who thoughthe was going to be. Gorell said,
quote, I'll be watching, butI'll not be showing up. It's
a new thing and there's no reasonfor Michael Scott to show up in something

(01:36:47):
like that. Right. I'm excitedabout it. I love the idea.
I guess it's set in a familynewspaper company and I worked with Dominall Gleeson.
He's been cast in this who isone of the leads. I did
the patient with him and he's anexcellent actor, super nice guy and I
think it'll be great. So yes, he'll show up in season three.

(01:37:08):
Yeah, maybe, Like Way Downthe Road and Paramount Plus. They've announced
their next South Park special. It'stitled south Park The End of Obesity,
and the log line says, theadvent of new weight loss drugs has a
huge impact on everyone in South Park, and when Cartman is denied access to

(01:37:28):
the life changing medicine, the kidsjump into actions. They put a teaser
out Cartman's being told by the doctorthat his weight is out of control and
he needs to go on a semiglue type uh huh. So this will
be the seventh South Park special.Four Paramount Plus coming outs a week from
today on the twenty fourth. I'mraving for more nerd stuff, check out
the nerd Net podcast at The WoodyShow dot com. Heard all right,

(01:37:53):
thank you very much, Rabel,you got a dog. It is time
for your birthdays and porno birthday show, Shimay, We're gonna it's Shiverday.
We're gonna sit it's Shay and youknow we don't do what birthday. I'm
so like half tuned out being that'sFriday and everything. Yeah, I forgot

(01:38:15):
the holidays. Anybody care? Imean it's National Pizza Party Day. That's
wild, and it's Pino Gregio Day, Greg okay, and pack Rat Day
Bravy. I have started purging thatis I have okay, your porno birthday
is coming up right after the celebritybirthdays. We start with Trent Reznor from

(01:38:36):
nine Inch Nails Today. Trent Resnoris fifty nine years old. Wow,
let's see. You got Josh Hamfrom Queen to the Stone Age. He's
fifty one. Sugar Ray Leonard,the boxing legend. Next year is gonna
be a big birthday Greg. Thisyear he's sixty eight, okay next year.
Next year is big. Craig Ferguson, he was James Corden's predecessor on

(01:38:58):
The Late Late Show. Craig Fergusonis sixty two. Tony Parker, the
retired NBA star used to be marriedto Aba Longoria. He's forty two.
Derek Hope Hoff Puff Hope whatever fromDancing The Guy with Dancing with the Stars.
He's thirty nine years old, andhe got David Eigenberg. He was

(01:39:19):
Steve from Sex and the City,the one married to the redhead Miranda.
Oh yeah, and then he wasalso on Chicago Fire. Remember that.
I remember that show in Chicago Fire. No, I watched it either one
of those like No, he waslike this, like dorky. You might
recognize him anyway. He's sixty yearsold today. And Jordan Knight, he

(01:39:42):
was really the dreamiest of the newkids on the block was and Greg He's
got his own HGTV show, FarmhouseFixer. That's Alreay. My wife is
going to see new Kids this weekend. Nice. Wait is he the host
of that show? Yeah? Ithought it was the gay one. No,
it's Jordan. No farm Farmhouse Fixeris oh my god, Oh Jonathan

(01:40:04):
Knight. Yeah, this is JordanKnight. Yeah, Jordan was the hog,
right, and then Jonathan Knight ourbrothers at least was his brother.
Oh and then forget what I said, So Jonathan is Farmhouse Fixer. Oh,
and forget what I said. Thankgod, we have that straightened out
though. Yeah, thank god,Greg, we got Greg around. You
know, yeah, you gotta knowthat doing the hottie and the gay one.

(01:40:26):
Yeah, Jordan Knight is fifty fouryears old today, and your porno
birthday is zoe Sparks with an X. She's done more stroking than the US
Olympic rowing team. She's been intwo hundred and eight fine films, including
a Cub Girls. She was alsoin anal Brats volume five. She was
fantastic in Catch Her in the Rye, catch her, catch her in the

(01:40:50):
Rocks. Okay, okay. Shewas in Fresh Faced Facials. Also here's
for Greg scaping and vaping Oh tonight. Yeah, maybe she was into the
Filthy Verse Part two, The FilthyVerse Natural Knockers Volume two. Also one
of the stars of Not My Grandpa. We can't forget her unforgetable role in

(01:41:14):
Mission Impussable. Oh my god,Yeah that is Zoey Smarks. He was
thirty one years old today. I'mmaking notes about that Jordan Night birthday.
Won't be making that mistake out noway on your face wedding rank God,
Greg was here though, Dixon.Bail me out at your part of birthday,
your celebrity birthdays, and that isa Friday morning. Look at what's

(01:41:36):
happening in the world of nerds.With your nerd Out Report, we got
some more Woodie Show for you.Next, hang on, don't go anywhere.
The Woody Show will be right back. Buila wouldn't approve the Woody Show.
Well, the hour is over.That's good news. Better news.

(01:41:58):
Today's show is over. The greatestnews of all. We have survived the
week, ladies and gentlemen here onthe Woody Show, and now it is
time two week. That was thegoal when we started the show. This
morning, dark and early, andnow here it is. It has come
to fruition, good time of theweekend. Tell you quickly what you can
find on the full Show podcast bygoing to the woodyshow dot com. Friday

(01:42:23):
fail stories are there, along withthe d u IQ. We had raveies
nerd out Report of course late usin the world of nerds, along with
your birthdays and your porn a birthdayand another riveting round of dad jokes.
Guys are really good at bringing those, yep, and we roll those out
on Fridays every once in a while. So that plus some of the trending
news headlines and some other stuff thatcame up today, it's all there on

(01:42:45):
the Friday podcast. Just hit upthwoodyshowdot com. Anything you got for us
over the weekend, you can leaveon the after hours voicemail. We encourage
you to do that. Eight sevenseven forty four Woody. Maybe you're listening
to the podcast. You got athought about one of the topics or things
we covered. H you got Greg'scommencement address that's on there. You got
the the here to defend the footfreak, our friend John Jay who called

(01:43:09):
in. We had a glory Wholechallenge. There's a lot on the week's
podcast. So caught up and youwant to, you know, sound off
about any of that. Please leaveus an after hour's voicemail or even a
drunk doll voicemail at eight seven sevenfour. Would he h one thing about
Monday? I'll tell you about Iknow this is give Greg something to look
forward to. He's always so bummedout on a Friday. Yes, look
forward to Monday, Greg, becauseradio's most immature game. Guess who's gas

(01:43:33):
on the air Monday here on theWoody Show. Raby Man Sea Bass,
Sammy. Anything you like to addyep, Greg Gory parting words of wisdom.
Please Yeah, hang out with peoplewho have a lot of issues,
because people with a lot of issueshave a lot of alcohol. Unless they
drank it all. Well, wellthen be you know, be a peach

(01:43:55):
and bring them some. Yeah,it might be they had a lot of
alcohol. Oh good point. Yeah, careful what you because any got to
deal with all their drama. Ohthat's true, but you'll be so drunk,
probably won't matter anyway, exactly.All right. Thank you very much,
Greg Gory. Thank you so muchfor giving the wood he show some
of your valuable time this week.You know we'd love it, appreciate you
for that. The rest of youguys can suck it. We will catch

(01:44:15):
back here on Monday. Have yourselfan amazing weekend. SMD double m bye,
a great Friday. You mother,