May 31, 2019 • 12 mins
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Morning. Everybody is d j Envy Angela, Ye Charlemagne the guy.
We are to breakfast club. Time to ask ye, hello,
who's this? Hi? Um? Hi is an anonymous? Hey anonymous?
How old you anonymous? I'm twenty. I just turned thirty.
Oh my god. She's like, what's your course for your
moments to say? But I'm turning down. Okay, So okay,
(00:24):
this is what it is. I try and keep it
like concise. Um, so we behave my husband and we
got married. Um, we got a green card, so you know,
good for him. Um, we have a child. Also, she's one.
It didn't work out like between me and him to
the point where like He's sleeping on the couch and
sometimes I'm sleeping on the couch and we're seeing other people.
(00:46):
Now we have court because you know, he started hitting me,
and the temporary restraining order it's up in a week.
And so like my question is I guess like I
feel like it's time for him to just go and
kind of leave, you know, me and my daughter and
the apartment and the car because you know she's not
(01:08):
even too yet, and just you know go like be
on his own or like be with his friends. Like
he has friends that he can sleep in their car
or like crash on there, you know, whoever, and just
take care of his daughter. Like I know he's not
rich and I'm not trying to destroy his life, but
like I don't know obviously, So wait, you're so the
fact that he's putting his hands on you and all
(01:28):
of that, but you're still thinking about not destroying his
life even though your safety and well being doesn't seem
to be the first most concern for him. I know,
I know, like I know, and and people keep telling
me that, and like I don't know, you can't care
about him more than you care about you. No, no,
And I don't you know, I don't, I definitely don't.
(01:51):
I just I don't know. I guess I'm afraid of
like what people will say, Like people will be like, oh, well,
because you know, you know, you're you're not really supposed
to call politics and stuff like that on your man
or whatever whose name is on whose name is on
the least for the apartment, and whose name is on
the car mine is my apartment. Well he's got to go, girl, Yeah,
(02:15):
he's got to go, and you should be like, look,
you have to pack your stuff up. And get out
of here. I'm trying not to call the police on
you so that you don't have to get arrested. But
you are putting your hands on me. You're doing We
have a daughter together. I do not want her to
grow up and think this is what a relationship is
supposed to be like. And I care about myself. If
you don't care about my well being, I care about me.
So I'm giving you the opportunity to do that. Now.
(02:36):
If you don't want to do that, then we'll have
to do things the legal way. Yeah. And I'm concerned
about your safety also because the fact that he's abusive
to you, which is what it is. I don't want
him to react in a way that you're you feel endangered.
Do you feel like you're in danger? Look, he stops me.
You know here's there's a campus somewhere in my house
(02:59):
that he like records everything that I do. His sister
called me. His sister called me all the way from Jamaica.
I don't know who invited her into the argument, but
his sister called me, and he's like and it's like, oh,
and even her threatening me, I just I don't know,
like acquire me is like afraid of what like our
community is gonna say. You know, girl, let me tell
(03:20):
you something. Everybody has issues, trust me, you know, and
that has nothing to do with who cares what any
everybody's gonna talk anyway, who cares, It doesn't matter. What
you have to care about the most is yourself and
your daughter. Nobody should even like, everybody has problems. So
whether or not people try to act perfect, we all
have issues. And you know, it feels great coming out
better on the other side of those issues. How about
(03:43):
can you move? Um? I mean, yeah, I just gonna
take me a little time to get the money together,
maybe a month or two, but yeah, I'm trying to
move anyway because I live in like the worst part
of town. Yeah. So I think this is a great
motivation for you to get it together, for you to
actually move, because I wouldn't even trust being there. You said,
he has cameras in the house and all of those things.
(04:05):
It feels just like a whole negative, bad vibe. And
I understand it's not easy to just pick up and move,
but he's got to go right now. And if that
means you have to call somebody that you you trust
to be there with you until he gets it together.
I would pack his stuff up and when he comes
to be like, this is what it is. I have
this person here and I will call the authorities if
there's an issue and change the locks. Yeah yeah, I
(04:26):
changed the locks already actually, and make sure that all
of this. If you have to go to court and
get a restraining order like you have already done and
get that taken care of, do those things to protect
yourself and to protect your custody. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
because the lady. The lady told me the other day
that you know that they removed children from homes that
with domestic violence, and I was like when she said,
(04:48):
I was like, Okay, where do I find right he's
got to get he's got to go, and guess what
if he gets the rest, whatever happens to him, that's
on him. It's his actions as causing those things. It's
not your actions. Is his actions. So if you have
to call the police on somebody because they're putting their
hands on you because they won't leave, that's his funt.
You gave him the opportunity to get out. It's like
either way, I don't care what you say. You can
(05:09):
play under my name. You can say whatever you want.
It's your fun. Get out anyway. Yeah, you can say Everywursday.
But like you know, I'm using my words and you're
using your hand. Yeah, you have other options, so you
gotta go. But yes, and I wish you the best
of luck. And I hope you call and check back
in on me. And I can't wait till you call
me and say, girl, he's out of the house. I
(05:30):
got my own place, a different place now and things
are so much better. So I look forward to that
day and I know you do too. Okay, fine, thank you, alright,
good luck, alright, Asking eight and five A five one
O five one. If you need relationship advice, hit us
up now. It was the breakfast clo good morning morning.
Everybody is DJ Envy, Angel Louie, Charlemagne, the guy. We
are the breakfast club in the middle of Ask ye, hello,
(05:53):
who's this? Can I be anamous? Sure? What's your question
for you? Men? You one? Um? So okay. So me
and my my boyfriend and also the father of my
child have been together, um for four years, and so
the last two years have been kind of iffy. Um.
(06:14):
So we had broken up and then we got back together.
But we've still been having issues and it's not more
so like he's done a lot. The reason why we
broke up was because of a lot of what he's
done in the past as far as like hurting me, cheating,
all that other stuff. And so you mean hurting your feelings, yes, okay.
(06:36):
So I feel like, um, where we are now. I
feel like he's in the insecure state because now that
he wants to fully commit, he's having all these insecure
moments by not really feeling like I'm being faithful. So
he's worried about karma and payback exactly, and he keeps
bringing it up. That's exactly what he keeps saying. He
(06:58):
keeps bringing up the whole um. You know, I want
to get married and I want to marry you, but
I don't want to get hurt. I don't want my
feelings her, I don't like sharing. But it's like I
had to go through all of that before. So and
my biggest thing is I'm not doing anything at all,
but it's like he will not trust me. So recently,
he just was granted this job offer, but it's in
(07:20):
another state, and so he's been considering taking this job offer.
Now he brought it up to me one at one time, um,
and we spoke about it, and I, you know, I
told him do whatever it's best for you at this point,
and so he's like, you know, I'm gonna stay here
and I'm gonna do it for you. But then when
we got into it again, he decided to take the offer.
(07:45):
And now that he's taking the offer, he's been like
calling and saying, you know, what do you want to do?
What do you want with us and all of this
other stuff. And my thing is, I'm not trying to relocate,
like you accepted this job offer of a spur of
the moment having an attitude type of thing, and now
(08:06):
you're getting upset that I'm telling you this was your decision.
It was give me any type of play in that
and making that decision. But now that it's the end
of the month and you have to get ready to leave,
you want me to go ahead and tell you like, no,
I want you to stay it. I want you to
be here with yes, I do. I don't want you
(08:27):
to leave our family. But at the same time, you
made this decision, so you can't come back on me.
So my thing is like, what because we got into
it again about it, and I just I don't know
what to do at this point. So you tell them
that you would like him to stay, but he's definitely leaving,
or you think that he's doing that for you to
be like, no, baby, please don't move. I want you
(08:49):
to stay. And yeah, because this whole thing is like
he keeps saying that he's not going to chase me anymore,
and I'm like, you gotta learn to stop playing these
games because he's only hurting himself and it's irritating. Like
now you cheat it on me, but you don't trust me.
That doesn't make any sense. I mean, it makes sense,
and you don't believe he's doing anything anymore, right, he
(09:11):
grew up. Well, first of all, it sounds like y'all
need to go see a professional therapist together and do
some couples therapy. I've tried that, and each time that
we would try to go in the past, um he
would say he would go, and then I will schedule
it and I will always end up going by myself. Well,
you need to tell him it's a priority right now
in order for this relationship to continue, because it's not
(09:34):
fair to you that you've had to deal with him
cheating on you, and then on top of that, now
you have to deal with him not trusting you. When
do you get to live right? Like, when do you
get to get spoiled and treated well? And you you
have to demand better for yourself. First of all, you're
not gonna beg him to stay to help feed his ego. Okay,
he made these decisions, and if that's what he wants
(09:54):
to do, obviously you don't want him to when you
can tell him that, but ultimately, as an adult, it's
his decision. And now perfecably you would let for him
to be there, and him leaving could actually end up
destroying the relationship because he doesn't trust you, and maybe
he doesn't trust you because he doesn't trust himself. Yeah,
And it's like I don't at this point. It's like
I'm not going to continue to feed into something that
(10:15):
you chose to do. It has to be exhausting to
you mentally. It is it, it really is. And I've
told him that several times, like you mentally dreamed me
at times, because it's like you play these little back
and forth games and then you expect me to set
up there and be the cleaner he needs to go
to therapy on his own as well, like he needs
(10:37):
to go by himself, and he needs to go with you,
But he's got to learn how to cope better and
understand why he's having these feelings because it's hard for
me to say it without speaking to him. But what's
going on with him that he feels so insecure right now?
He probably doesn't feel like he's worthy of you, and
he's taking it out on you. Yeah, listen, we'll try
to where what city are you in? Houston? Houston? You
(10:59):
know what? And I love the fact that you made
these appointments, but it's very disappointing that he won't go.
And if he really does want to work on things
and feel more secure, than he needs to actually make
the effort to do that. Yeah, So I encourage you
to continue on that and tell him that the relationship
is not gonna work if he doesn't go. And I
would say he needs to go on his own as well,
So if you have to make that appointment for him
to go so he could be more comfortable with it,
(11:20):
maybe without you there, that might be helpful for him
to to have someone else to talk to. I still
doubt that he does it, So he has to if
he wants to, if he's dedicated and committed to making
this relationship work, that's what he's going to have to do.
And I'll be like, look, I'm not spending all this
money for you to cancel an appointment again, right, all right,
But you've seem very level headed, so I think that
(11:41):
the family can can appreciate that. But I just want
you to live your life, and I want you to
be spoiled and I want you to be taken care of. Yeah,
and that's what my family has been saying as well. Right,
he sounds kind of toxic. Yeah, well, thank you so much,
Thank you everyone, all right, good luck h Town year
eight D five A five one O five Megan the
(12:02):
Stallion do if you got a course of a year,
you can hit it up right now. We got rumors
on the way. Yes, let's talk about Magic Johnson's there's
these allegations that he's terrible to work with. Find out
how he responds. All right, we'll get into that next
keeping lock this to Breakfast Club. Good morning,
Morning. Everybody is d j Envy Angela, Ye Charlemagne the guy.
We are to breakfast club. Time to ask ye, hello,
who's this? Hi? Um? Hi is an anonymous? Hey anonymous?
How old you anonymous? I'm twenty. I just turned thirty.
Oh my god. She's like, what's your course for your
moments to say? But I'm turning down. Okay, So okay,
(00:24):
this is what it is. I try and keep it
like concise. Um, so we behave my husband and we
got married. Um, we got a green card, so you know,
good for him. Um, we have a child. Also, she's one.
It didn't work out like between me and him to
the point where like He's sleeping on the couch and
sometimes I'm sleeping on the couch and we're seeing other people.
(00:46):
Now we have court because you know, he started hitting me,
and the temporary restraining order it's up in a week.
And so like my question is I guess like I
feel like it's time for him to just go and
kind of leave, you know, me and my daughter and
the apartment and the car because you know she's not
(01:08):
even too yet, and just you know go like be
on his own or like be with his friends. Like
he has friends that he can sleep in their car
or like crash on there, you know, whoever, and just
take care of his daughter. Like I know he's not
rich and I'm not trying to destroy his life, but
like I don't know obviously, So wait, you're so the
fact that he's putting his hands on you and all
(01:28):
of that, but you're still thinking about not destroying his
life even though your safety and well being doesn't seem
to be the first most concern for him. I know,
I know, like I know, and and people keep telling
me that, and like I don't know, you can't care
about him more than you care about you. No, no,
And I don't you know, I don't, I definitely don't.
(01:51):
I just I don't know. I guess I'm afraid of
like what people will say, Like people will be like, oh, well,
because you know, you know, you're you're not really supposed
to call politics and stuff like that on your man
or whatever whose name is on whose name is on
the least for the apartment, and whose name is on
the car mine is my apartment. Well he's got to go, girl, Yeah,
(02:15):
he's got to go, and you should be like, look,
you have to pack your stuff up. And get out
of here. I'm trying not to call the police on
you so that you don't have to get arrested. But
you are putting your hands on me. You're doing We
have a daughter together. I do not want her to
grow up and think this is what a relationship is
supposed to be like. And I care about myself. If
you don't care about my well being, I care about me.
So I'm giving you the opportunity to do that. Now.
(02:36):
If you don't want to do that, then we'll have
to do things the legal way. Yeah. And I'm concerned
about your safety also because the fact that he's abusive
to you, which is what it is. I don't want
him to react in a way that you're you feel endangered.
Do you feel like you're in danger? Look, he stops me.
You know here's there's a campus somewhere in my house
(02:59):
that he like records everything that I do. His sister
called me. His sister called me all the way from Jamaica.
I don't know who invited her into the argument, but
his sister called me, and he's like and it's like, oh,
and even her threatening me, I just I don't know,
like acquire me is like afraid of what like our
community is gonna say. You know, girl, let me tell
(03:20):
you something. Everybody has issues, trust me, you know, and
that has nothing to do with who cares what any
everybody's gonna talk anyway, who cares, It doesn't matter. What
you have to care about the most is yourself and
your daughter. Nobody should even like, everybody has problems. So
whether or not people try to act perfect, we all
have issues. And you know, it feels great coming out
better on the other side of those issues. How about
(03:43):
can you move? Um? I mean, yeah, I just gonna
take me a little time to get the money together,
maybe a month or two, but yeah, I'm trying to
move anyway because I live in like the worst part
of town. Yeah. So I think this is a great
motivation for you to get it together, for you to
actually move, because I wouldn't even trust being there. You said,
he has cameras in the house and all of those things.
(04:05):
It feels just like a whole negative, bad vibe. And
I understand it's not easy to just pick up and move,
but he's got to go right now. And if that
means you have to call somebody that you you trust
to be there with you until he gets it together.
I would pack his stuff up and when he comes
to be like, this is what it is. I have
this person here and I will call the authorities if
there's an issue and change the locks. Yeah yeah, I
(04:26):
changed the locks already actually, and make sure that all
of this. If you have to go to court and
get a restraining order like you have already done and
get that taken care of, do those things to protect
yourself and to protect your custody. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
because the lady. The lady told me the other day
that you know that they removed children from homes that
with domestic violence, and I was like when she said,
(04:48):
I was like, Okay, where do I find right he's
got to get he's got to go, and guess what
if he gets the rest, whatever happens to him, that's
on him. It's his actions as causing those things. It's
not your actions. Is his actions. So if you have
to call the police on somebody because they're putting their
hands on you because they won't leave, that's his funt.
You gave him the opportunity to get out. It's like
either way, I don't care what you say. You can
(05:09):
play under my name. You can say whatever you want.
It's your fun. Get out anyway. Yeah, you can say Everywursday.
But like you know, I'm using my words and you're
using your hand. Yeah, you have other options, so you
gotta go. But yes, and I wish you the best
of luck. And I hope you call and check back
in on me. And I can't wait till you call
me and say, girl, he's out of the house. I
(05:30):
got my own place, a different place now and things
are so much better. So I look forward to that
day and I know you do too. Okay, fine, thank you, alright,
good luck, alright, Asking eight and five A five one
O five one. If you need relationship advice, hit us
up now. It was the breakfast clo good morning morning.
Everybody is DJ Envy, Angel Louie, Charlemagne, the guy. We
are the breakfast club in the middle of Ask ye, hello,
(05:53):
who's this? Can I be anamous? Sure? What's your question
for you? Men? You one? Um? So okay. So me
and my my boyfriend and also the father of my
child have been together, um for four years, and so
the last two years have been kind of iffy. Um.
(06:14):
So we had broken up and then we got back together.
But we've still been having issues and it's not more
so like he's done a lot. The reason why we
broke up was because of a lot of what he's
done in the past as far as like hurting me, cheating,
all that other stuff. And so you mean hurting your feelings, yes, okay.
(06:36):
So I feel like, um, where we are now. I
feel like he's in the insecure state because now that
he wants to fully commit, he's having all these insecure
moments by not really feeling like I'm being faithful. So
he's worried about karma and payback exactly, and he keeps
bringing it up. That's exactly what he keeps saying. He
(06:58):
keeps bringing up the whole um. You know, I want
to get married and I want to marry you, but
I don't want to get hurt. I don't want my
feelings her, I don't like sharing. But it's like I
had to go through all of that before. So and
my biggest thing is I'm not doing anything at all,
but it's like he will not trust me. So recently,
he just was granted this job offer, but it's in
(07:20):
another state, and so he's been considering taking this job offer.
Now he brought it up to me one at one time, um,
and we spoke about it, and I, you know, I
told him do whatever it's best for you at this point,
and so he's like, you know, I'm gonna stay here
and I'm gonna do it for you. But then when
we got into it again, he decided to take the offer.
(07:45):
And now that he's taking the offer, he's been like
calling and saying, you know, what do you want to do?
What do you want with us and all of this
other stuff. And my thing is, I'm not trying to relocate,
like you accepted this job offer of a spur of
the moment having an attitude type of thing, and now
(08:06):
you're getting upset that I'm telling you this was your decision.
It was give me any type of play in that
and making that decision. But now that it's the end
of the month and you have to get ready to leave,
you want me to go ahead and tell you like, no,
I want you to stay it. I want you to
be here with yes, I do. I don't want you
(08:27):
to leave our family. But at the same time, you
made this decision, so you can't come back on me.
So my thing is like, what because we got into
it again about it, and I just I don't know
what to do at this point. So you tell them
that you would like him to stay, but he's definitely leaving,
or you think that he's doing that for you to
be like, no, baby, please don't move. I want you
(08:49):
to stay. And yeah, because this whole thing is like
he keeps saying that he's not going to chase me anymore,
and I'm like, you gotta learn to stop playing these
games because he's only hurting himself and it's irritating. Like
now you cheat it on me, but you don't trust me.
That doesn't make any sense. I mean, it makes sense,
and you don't believe he's doing anything anymore, right, he
(09:11):
grew up. Well, first of all, it sounds like y'all
need to go see a professional therapist together and do
some couples therapy. I've tried that, and each time that
we would try to go in the past, um he
would say he would go, and then I will schedule
it and I will always end up going by myself. Well,
you need to tell him it's a priority right now
in order for this relationship to continue, because it's not
(09:34):
fair to you that you've had to deal with him
cheating on you, and then on top of that, now
you have to deal with him not trusting you. When
do you get to live right? Like, when do you
get to get spoiled and treated well? And you you
have to demand better for yourself. First of all, you're
not gonna beg him to stay to help feed his ego. Okay,
he made these decisions, and if that's what he wants
(09:54):
to do, obviously you don't want him to when you
can tell him that, but ultimately, as an adult, it's
his decision. And now perfecably you would let for him
to be there, and him leaving could actually end up
destroying the relationship because he doesn't trust you, and maybe
he doesn't trust you because he doesn't trust himself. Yeah,
And it's like I don't at this point. It's like
I'm not going to continue to feed into something that
(10:15):
you chose to do. It has to be exhausting to
you mentally. It is it, it really is. And I've
told him that several times, like you mentally dreamed me
at times, because it's like you play these little back
and forth games and then you expect me to set
up there and be the cleaner he needs to go
to therapy on his own as well, like he needs
(10:37):
to go by himself, and he needs to go with you,
But he's got to learn how to cope better and
understand why he's having these feelings because it's hard for
me to say it without speaking to him. But what's
going on with him that he feels so insecure right now?
He probably doesn't feel like he's worthy of you, and
he's taking it out on you. Yeah, listen, we'll try
to where what city are you in? Houston? Houston? You
(10:59):
know what? And I love the fact that you made
these appointments, but it's very disappointing that he won't go.
And if he really does want to work on things
and feel more secure, than he needs to actually make
the effort to do that. Yeah, So I encourage you
to continue on that and tell him that the relationship
is not gonna work if he doesn't go. And I
would say he needs to go on his own as well,
So if you have to make that appointment for him
to go so he could be more comfortable with it,
(11:20):
maybe without you there, that might be helpful for him
to to have someone else to talk to. I still
doubt that he does it, So he has to if
he wants to, if he's dedicated and committed to making
this relationship work, that's what he's going to have to do.
And I'll be like, look, I'm not spending all this
money for you to cancel an appointment again, right, all right,
But you've seem very level headed, so I think that
(11:41):
the family can can appreciate that. But I just want
you to live your life, and I want you to
be spoiled and I want you to be taken care of. Yeah,
and that's what my family has been saying as well. Right,
he sounds kind of toxic. Yeah, well, thank you so much,
Thank you everyone, all right, good luck h Town year
eight D five A five one O five Megan the
(12:02):
Stallion do if you got a course of a year,
you can hit it up right now. We got rumors
on the way. Yes, let's talk about Magic Johnson's there's
these allegations that he's terrible to work with. Find out
how he responds. All right, we'll get into that next
keeping lock this to Breakfast Club. Good morning,
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