February 12, 2021 • 8 mins
Ask Yee Topic: We Have 2 Kids & He Still Won't Marry Me
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Morning. Everybody is DJ and Angela, Ye, Charlomagne the guy.
We are the breakfast club. Now it's time for asking
ye eight on drink five eight five one on five one. Hello,
who's this? Hi? Is Tierra a Tierra? What's your course
to for you? Why isn't anyone committed anymore? Why doesn't
anyone want to give it a shot? They just are
here for a good time and they can never really
(00:24):
commit or even want to commit. Well, give me some
examples where first of all, where are you meeting these guys?
And secondly, what what's what's happening to you? Um? Friends,
I guess mutual friends and dating apps, a little bit
of everything. But um, I gave someone six months of
my time, and I'm a successful woman and I got
two kids, I got everything that a man could want.
(00:44):
I don't understand why after six months you can't commit
or even off the loyalty right? And I think sometimes
we act like wearing relationships and give guys those relationship
benefits and perks without actually being in one. Very true,
and so sometimes guys don't like they need to commit
because they're getting everything that they want to need from
you without that. And so yes, there is a period
(01:06):
of time that you're dating and you're trying to see
if this is gonna work out. But then after a
certain amount of time, if you feel like he wants
to go this way and I want to go that way,
you know it is what it is. But that's why
I do believe that you can't give a guy everything
that you would give him if you were in a
relationship if you're not committed, which means that you can't
focus on just one person for six months and act
(01:29):
like that's your man if he's not your man. Sometimes
we prioritize these men and and we choose them over
our friends and our family. We go all out and
he's not going all out. Yeah, I understood, So I
need to change my my vibe a little bit, right,
And I think it is important. Sometimes we don't want
to say that we want to be in a relationship
or say that we're looking for that because we don't
(01:50):
want a guy to feel pressured. But it is important
to be upfront about intentions if things do get to
that point. So if you decide you really like somebody
and this is what you one, it shouldn't take six
months to be like leg this is you know what
I'm striving toward. What are you striving to our? What
are your plans? We gotta have those conversations. Yeah, awesome,
Thank you Angela. All right, you have a good luck.
(02:12):
All Right, we got more when we come back. If
you need relationship device and any type of advice. He
right now with the Breakfast Club. Good morning morning. Everybody
is TV j Envy, Angela, Yee, Charlotte the guy. We
all the Breakfast Club. We're in the middle of Aska. Yee. Hello,
who's this Hi? This is Jasmine from Jersey. Hey, Jasmine
from Jersey. What's your question for you? Hi? Ye? First
(02:34):
of all, congratulations, you guys are doing an awesome job.
I watched this every day. I work for Amazon and
I watch it. I mean I listened to it every
single day before my morning. Gives me a lot of laughs,
So big up. See you guys on that. Um Hi, Okay,
So I'm calling because I'm with my partner for and
I call on partner because I don't like saying my
man on my boyfriend. So I've done with my partner
for about seven years now and we have two kids. Now.
(02:57):
Before we started having kids, I let them know, like
marriage is important to me, like it really is, like
I told him, and he said he understood. Okay, Now
it's been too like two kids in seven years down now,
and I've given him an ultimatum at the end of
this year, in the middle of this year, that you
know it's done for me, Like if it doesn't happen,
or if you feel like still for some reason that
(03:18):
you can't um that you can't make this final step
with me. Now, I'm a woman that I don't like.
Money is not a big for me. Like if you
if you put a ring together, like if you cut
a newspaper out and fold it up and give it
to me, because I understand how times are and stuff
like that, it would mean a lot to me that
you actually got down on your knee and say, you
know what, this is what I want to do with you,
(03:40):
this is this is I really I'm really feeling this
and it's really important to me. But he hasn't even
you know, done that. And and for me, like I'm
really thinking about going through with the ultimatum because I
feel like you're really dragging your feet and I know
that I'm a queen and I'm a prize and I
think I've done my due diligence, Jasmine. It seems like
you already know what you want to do. You did
(04:00):
give him an ultimatum. You let him know, this is
what I want. I want to be married. It's been
seven years and you guys do have two kids. And
the problem with giving an ultimatum is if you don't
follow through, is he gonna take it seriously? Exactly? Yeah? Yeah,
And sometimes sometimes actually following through it, that is what
might push him to be like, damn, I might really
(04:21):
lose what I have. Just like it's crazy because you know,
I mean, we've been through a lot, like any other
relationship has, and it's crazy that you will have to
go through that extent for somebody to understand, like like
I really like I literally sat down, like we were
both sitting down on his bed, and I told him
before we because I knew the next day because he's Jamaican. Okay,
(04:42):
so and the next day she's gonna want kids. And
I went to his mom house and before the eating
discussion about anything else, everyone wants to talk about kids.
And I understand that part, Okay, I understand that, But
my whole thing was that you know, no one wants
to discuss the marriage part, but everyone wants to discuss
skis right. I agree with your topic about about UM.
(05:03):
I believe like a Caribbean UM for relationship is concerned.
I think it's really deep rooted in some other things.
But that's beyond the point. But I was like, Okay,
I can deal with that, but as long as you
can follow through and what you're supposed to and I've
always gotten yeah, And it's like it's like damn, Like
I try so hard not to be a part of
the statistics because you don't want to be that and
(05:25):
that stuff does go through your mind. Because Jasmine, I
want to say, don't you don't worry about what other
people think. Don't worry about statistics. Worry about what it
is that you want. That is has nothing to do
with anything. We can't be concerned about these realistic or
unrealistic expectations that people have. Does he believe in marriage
and is he saying that he's open to it? Yeah,
he believes the marriage. Yeah, he believes in marriage. He
(05:48):
believe he does believe in marriage. So my advice to you,
Jasmine is you've given him this ultimatum, and I think
the worst thing you can do is keep bringing it
up all the time and talking about it with him
constantly and doing that, I think you just gotta let
him know what it is and be like, I'm gonna
give you your time. This is the deadline for when
this is gonna happen. If you still don't know what
you want to do, then you know, perhaps we need
(06:10):
to take a break until you can figure it out.
Because sometimes, again, you guys are living together. He's getting
everything he wants, he's got his family, he doesn't feel
like that's being threatened. But it's not everything that you want.
And sometimes in order for you to get what you want,
you have to really be uh serious about it, Yeah,
but also not being always always always talking about it.
(06:32):
Like just enjoy your relationship, enjoy your children, but know
that it just doesn't happen. Definitely, like we've had so
many great moments. I definitely enjoy him. He's a great man.
First of all, big up to him. He's a great man.
He's a great provider. You know, he's a he does
everything across the board great. It's just that this this
one little small thing, it's not small, but this one thing,
(06:55):
like it's not small but it's just it's like, it
means a lot to you. Yeah, it does. It means
a lot to you, and he's got to respect that
and know that if he doesn't have these intentions, and
you've given him plenty of time, so just followed through
what it is you said you're gonna do. He knows
you love him and it's not him now. Yeah, but um,
(07:16):
big big up to all the Jamaican men out there,
I'm not No, I'm not Jamaican. He's Jamaican though, he's Jamaican. Okay,
they're great, lover. No I'm not. I'm not. Uh, that's
a lot they don't. They don't eat the poem poem though,
(07:38):
so they say, Okay, that's what you guys want to say.
But trust me, if you guys woman and the right
right for and the right foreign woman, you guys get
what ye don't worry about it. Yeah, they just don't
talk about it, all right. That was asking five eight
five one o five one. Now we got rules on
the way, yes, And can calling somebody a sexy asked
(07:58):
looking cockroach ever be a compliment? We'll talk about it.
It feels like that somebody might have called Charlemagne that before.
But anyway, we'll talk about it when we come back, said,
I look like a cockroach. It's the Breakfast Club. Good
morning ye
Morning. Everybody is DJ and Angela, Ye, Charlomagne the guy.
We are the breakfast club. Now it's time for asking
ye eight on drink five eight five one on five one. Hello,
who's this? Hi? Is Tierra a Tierra? What's your course
to for you? Why isn't anyone committed anymore? Why doesn't
anyone want to give it a shot? They just are
here for a good time and they can never really
(00:24):
commit or even want to commit. Well, give me some
examples where first of all, where are you meeting these guys?
And secondly, what what's what's happening to you? Um? Friends,
I guess mutual friends and dating apps, a little bit
of everything. But um, I gave someone six months of
my time, and I'm a successful woman and I got
two kids, I got everything that a man could want.
(00:44):
I don't understand why after six months you can't commit
or even off the loyalty right? And I think sometimes
we act like wearing relationships and give guys those relationship
benefits and perks without actually being in one. Very true,
and so sometimes guys don't like they need to commit
because they're getting everything that they want to need from
you without that. And so yes, there is a period
(01:06):
of time that you're dating and you're trying to see
if this is gonna work out. But then after a
certain amount of time, if you feel like he wants
to go this way and I want to go that way,
you know it is what it is. But that's why
I do believe that you can't give a guy everything
that you would give him if you were in a
relationship if you're not committed, which means that you can't
focus on just one person for six months and act
(01:29):
like that's your man if he's not your man. Sometimes
we prioritize these men and and we choose them over
our friends and our family. We go all out and
he's not going all out. Yeah, I understood, So I
need to change my my vibe a little bit, right,
And I think it is important. Sometimes we don't want
to say that we want to be in a relationship
or say that we're looking for that because we don't
(01:50):
want a guy to feel pressured. But it is important
to be upfront about intentions if things do get to
that point. So if you decide you really like somebody
and this is what you one, it shouldn't take six
months to be like leg this is you know what
I'm striving toward. What are you striving to our? What
are your plans? We gotta have those conversations. Yeah, awesome,
Thank you Angela. All right, you have a good luck.
(02:12):
All Right, we got more when we come back. If
you need relationship device and any type of advice. He
right now with the Breakfast Club. Good morning morning. Everybody
is TV j Envy, Angela, Yee, Charlotte the guy. We
all the Breakfast Club. We're in the middle of Aska. Yee. Hello,
who's this Hi? This is Jasmine from Jersey. Hey, Jasmine
from Jersey. What's your question for you? Hi? Ye? First
(02:34):
of all, congratulations, you guys are doing an awesome job.
I watched this every day. I work for Amazon and
I watch it. I mean I listened to it every
single day before my morning. Gives me a lot of laughs,
So big up. See you guys on that. Um Hi, Okay,
So I'm calling because I'm with my partner for and
I call on partner because I don't like saying my
man on my boyfriend. So I've done with my partner
for about seven years now and we have two kids. Now.
(02:57):
Before we started having kids, I let them know, like
marriage is important to me, like it really is, like
I told him, and he said he understood. Okay, Now
it's been too like two kids in seven years down now,
and I've given him an ultimatum at the end of
this year, in the middle of this year, that you
know it's done for me, Like if it doesn't happen,
or if you feel like still for some reason that
(03:18):
you can't um that you can't make this final step
with me. Now, I'm a woman that I don't like.
Money is not a big for me. Like if you
if you put a ring together, like if you cut
a newspaper out and fold it up and give it
to me, because I understand how times are and stuff
like that, it would mean a lot to me that
you actually got down on your knee and say, you
know what, this is what I want to do with you,
(03:40):
this is this is I really I'm really feeling this
and it's really important to me. But he hasn't even
you know, done that. And and for me, like I'm
really thinking about going through with the ultimatum because I
feel like you're really dragging your feet and I know
that I'm a queen and I'm a prize and I
think I've done my due diligence, Jasmine. It seems like
you already know what you want to do. You did
(04:00):
give him an ultimatum. You let him know, this is
what I want. I want to be married. It's been
seven years and you guys do have two kids. And
the problem with giving an ultimatum is if you don't
follow through, is he gonna take it seriously? Exactly? Yeah? Yeah,
And sometimes sometimes actually following through it, that is what
might push him to be like, damn, I might really
(04:21):
lose what I have. Just like it's crazy because you know,
I mean, we've been through a lot, like any other
relationship has, and it's crazy that you will have to
go through that extent for somebody to understand, like like
I really like I literally sat down, like we were
both sitting down on his bed, and I told him
before we because I knew the next day because he's Jamaican. Okay,
(04:42):
so and the next day she's gonna want kids. And
I went to his mom house and before the eating
discussion about anything else, everyone wants to talk about kids.
And I understand that part, Okay, I understand that, But
my whole thing was that you know, no one wants
to discuss the marriage part, but everyone wants to discuss
skis right. I agree with your topic about about UM.
(05:03):
I believe like a Caribbean UM for relationship is concerned.
I think it's really deep rooted in some other things.
But that's beyond the point. But I was like, Okay,
I can deal with that, but as long as you
can follow through and what you're supposed to and I've
always gotten yeah, And it's like it's like damn, Like
I try so hard not to be a part of
the statistics because you don't want to be that and
(05:25):
that stuff does go through your mind. Because Jasmine, I
want to say, don't you don't worry about what other
people think. Don't worry about statistics. Worry about what it
is that you want. That is has nothing to do
with anything. We can't be concerned about these realistic or
unrealistic expectations that people have. Does he believe in marriage
and is he saying that he's open to it? Yeah,
he believes the marriage. Yeah, he believes in marriage. He
(05:48):
believe he does believe in marriage. So my advice to you,
Jasmine is you've given him this ultimatum, and I think
the worst thing you can do is keep bringing it
up all the time and talking about it with him
constantly and doing that, I think you just gotta let
him know what it is and be like, I'm gonna
give you your time. This is the deadline for when
this is gonna happen. If you still don't know what
you want to do, then you know, perhaps we need
(06:10):
to take a break until you can figure it out.
Because sometimes, again, you guys are living together. He's getting
everything he wants, he's got his family, he doesn't feel
like that's being threatened. But it's not everything that you want.
And sometimes in order for you to get what you want,
you have to really be uh serious about it, Yeah,
but also not being always always always talking about it.
(06:32):
Like just enjoy your relationship, enjoy your children, but know
that it just doesn't happen. Definitely, like we've had so
many great moments. I definitely enjoy him. He's a great man.
First of all, big up to him. He's a great man.
He's a great provider. You know, he's a he does
everything across the board great. It's just that this this
one little small thing, it's not small, but this one thing,
(06:55):
like it's not small but it's just it's like, it
means a lot to you. Yeah, it does. It means
a lot to you, and he's got to respect that
and know that if he doesn't have these intentions, and
you've given him plenty of time, so just followed through
what it is you said you're gonna do. He knows
you love him and it's not him now. Yeah, but um,
(07:16):
big big up to all the Jamaican men out there,
I'm not No, I'm not Jamaican. He's Jamaican though, he's Jamaican. Okay,
they're great, lover. No I'm not. I'm not. Uh, that's
a lot they don't. They don't eat the poem poem though,
(07:38):
so they say, Okay, that's what you guys want to say.
But trust me, if you guys woman and the right
right for and the right foreign woman, you guys get
what ye don't worry about it. Yeah, they just don't
talk about it, all right. That was asking five eight
five one o five one. Now we got rules on
the way, yes, And can calling somebody a sexy asked
(07:58):
looking cockroach ever be a compliment? We'll talk about it.
It feels like that somebody might have called Charlemagne that before.
But anyway, we'll talk about it when we come back, said,
I look like a cockroach. It's the Breakfast Club. Good
morning ye
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