Why Isn't Anyone Committed Anymore?

Ask Yee caller wants advice on why people can't stay in a relationship

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Morning. Everybody is d j Envy Angela, Ye, Charlemagne the guy.
We are the breakfast club. Now it's time to ask
ye eight on drink five eight five one five one Hello?
Who's this? Hi? Is tier Era a Tierra? What's your
coursetion for you? Why isn't anyone committed anymore? Why doesn't
anyone want to give it a shot? They just are
here for a good time and they can never really

(00:21):
commit or even want to commit. Well, give me some
examples where first of all, where are you meeting these guys?
And secondly, what what's what's happening to you? Um? Friends,
I guess, mutual friends and dating apps, a little bit
of everything. But um, I gave someone six months of
my time, and I'm a successful woman and I got
two kids, I got everything that a man could want.

(00:41):
I don't understand why after six months you can't commit
or even off the loyalty right? And I think sometimes
we act like wearing relationships and give guys those relationship
benefits and perks without actually being in one. Very true,
and so sometimes guys don't feel like they need to
commit because they're getting everything that they want need from
you without that And so yes, there is a period

(01:03):
of time that you're dating and you're trying to see
if this is gonna work out. But then after a
certain amount of time, if you feel like he wants
to go this way and I want to go that way,
you know it is what it is. But that's why
I do believe that you can't give a guy everything
that you would give him if you were in a
relationship if you're not committed, which means that you can't
focus on just one person for six months and act

(01:26):
like that's your man if he's not your man. Sometimes
we prioritize these men and and we choose them over
our friends and our family. We go all out and
he's not going all out. Yeah, I understood, So I
need to change my my vibe a little bit, right,
And I think it is important. Sometimes we don't want
to say that we want to be in a relationship
or say that we're looking for that, because we don't

(01:47):
want a guy to feel pressured, But it is important
to be upfront about intentions if things do get to
that point. So if you decide you really like somebody
and this is what you want, it shouldn't take six
months to be like, look, this is you know what
I'm striving to our? What are you striving to our?
What are your plans? We gotta have those conversations. Yeah, awesome,
Thank you Angela. All right, you have a good luck.

(02:09):
All Right, we got more when we come back. If
you need relationship device and any type of advice. He
eat right now with the Breakfast Club, Good morning, morning everybody,
ist v j Envy, Angela, Yee, Charlotte and the guy.
We all the Breakfast Club were in the middle of
ask ye, Hello, who's this Hi? This is Jasmine from Jersey. Hey,
Jasmine from Jersey. What's your question for you? Hi? Ye?

(02:31):
First of all, congratulations, you guys are doing an awesome job.
I watched this every day. I work for Amazon and
I watch it. I mean I listened to it every
single day before my morning. Gives me a lot of laughs.
So big up to you guys on that. Um Hi, Okay,
So I'm calling because I'm with my partner for and
I call on partner because I don't like saying my
man on my boyfriend. So I've do with my partner

(02:51):
for about seven years now and we have two kids. Now.
Before we started having kids, I let them know like
marriage is important to me, like it really is, like
I told him, and he said he understood. Okay, Now
it's been too like two kids in seven years down now,
and I've given him an ultimatum at the end of
this year, in the middle of this year, that you
know it's done for me, Like if it doesn't happen,

(03:13):
or if you feel like still for some reason that
you can't um that you can't make this final step
with me. Now, I'm a woman that I don't like.
Money is not a big for me, Like if you
if you put a ring together, like if you cut
a newspaper out and fold it up and give it
to me, because I understand how times are and stuff
like that, it would mean a lot to me that

(03:33):
you actually got down on your knee and said, you
know what, this is what I want to do with you,
this is this is I really I'm really feeling this
and it's really important to me. But he hasn't even
you know, done that. And and for me, like I'm
really thinking about going through with the ultimatum because I
feel like you're really dragging your feet and I know
that I'm a queen and I'm a prize and I

(03:53):
think I've done my due diligence, Jasmine. It seems like
you already know what you want to do. You did
give him an ultimatum. You let him know, this is
what I want. I want to be married. It's been
seven years and you guys do have two kids. And
the problem with giving an ultimatum is if you don't
follow through, is he gonna take it seriously? Exactly? Yeah? Yeah,
and sometimes sometimes actually following through it, that is what

(04:16):
my push him to be, Like, damn, I might really
lose what I have, just like it's crazy because you know,
I mean, we've been through a lot, like any other
relationship has, and it's crazy that you will have to
go to that extent for somebody to understand, like like
I really like I literally sat down, like we were
both sitting down on his bed, and I told him

(04:37):
before we because I knew the next day because he's Jamaican. Okay,
so and the next day she's gonna want kids. And
I went to his mom house and before the eating
discussion about anything else, everyone wants to talk about kids.
And I understand that part, Okay, I understand that, But
my hole thing was that you know, no one wants
to discuss the marriage part, but everyone wants to discuss kids, right.

(04:58):
I agree with the topic about about UM. I believe
like a Caribbean UM for relationship is concerned. I think
it's really deep rooted in some other things. But that's
beyond the point. But I was like, Okay, I can
deal with that, but as long as you can follow
through and what you're supposed to and I've always gotten yeah,
And it's like it's like damn, like I try so

(05:19):
hard not to be a part of the statistics because
you don't want to be that, and that's stuff does
go through your mind. But Jasmine, I want to say,
don't you don't worry about what other people think. Don't
worry about statistics. Worry about what it is that you want.
That is has nothing to do with anything. We can't
be concerned about these realistic or unrealistic expectations that people have.
Does he believe in marriage and is he saying that

(05:41):
he's open to it? Yeah, he believes the marriage. Yeah
he believes in marriage. He believe he doesntlieve in marriage.
So my advice to you, Jasmine is you've given him
this ultimatum, and I think the worst thing you can
do is keep bringing it up all the time and
talking about it with him constantly and doing that. I
think you just gotta let him know what it is
and be like, I'm gonna give you your time. This

(06:02):
is the deadline for when this is gonna happen. If
you still don't know what you want to do, then
you know, perhaps we need to take a break until
you can figure it out. Because sometimes, again, you guys
are living together. He's getting everything he wants, he's got
his family, he doesn't feel like that's being threatened. But
it's not everything that you want. And sometimes in order
for you to get what you want, you have to

(06:22):
really be uh serious about it. Yeah, but also not
be always always always talking about it. Like, just enjoy
your relationship, enjoy your children, but know that it this
doesn't happen. I definitely like we've had so many great moments.
I definitely enjoy him. He's a great man. First of all,
big us to him. He's a great man. He's a

(06:42):
great provider. You know, he's a he does everything across
the board great. It's just that this this one little
small thing, it's not small, but this one like it's
it's not small, but it's just it's like, it means
a lot to you. Yeah, it means a lot to you.
And he's got to respect that and know that if

(07:03):
he doesn't have these intentions, and you've given him plenty
of time, so just followed through what it is you
said you're gonna do. He knows you love him and
it's not him now. Yeah, but um, big big up
to all the other Jamaican men out there, I'm not
I'm not Jamaican. He's Jamaican though, he's Jamaican. Okay, they're

(07:24):
they're great lovers. No, I'm not. I'm not that. Huh.
That's a lot. They don't eat the poom poom though,
that's what they say. Okay, that's what you guys want
to say. But trust me, if you definitely woman and
the right right for and the right form woman, you
guys get what ye don't worry about it. They just

(07:46):
don't talk about it, all right. That was asking eight
five one five one that we got rules on the way. Yes,
And can calling somebody a sexy asked looking cocky roach
ever be a compliment? We'll talk about it. Feels like
that this body might have called Charlemagne that before. But anyway,
we'll talk about it when we come back, said, I
look like a cockroach. It's the Breakfast Club. Go more.