Billie Eilish Candidly Reveals She Didn't Think She'd Make It To 17

By Eliot Hill

January 24, 2020

Ahead of her 2020 GRAMMY Awards performance, Billie Eilish sat down with CBS News' Gayle King for a candid interview about her career and the impac fame has had on her well-being.

The 18-year-old is the youngest artist to be nominated for the four general field categories at the GRAMMYs: Record of the Year, Album of the Year, Song of the Year, and Best New Artist. While she may be on top now, the singer had been hiding a serious case of clinical depression.

In the interview, the “everything i wanted” singer not only opened up about her depression and anxiety but revealed it got so bad once that she considered ending her life.

“I was so unhappy last year,” Eilish explained. “I was so unhappy, and I was so, like, joyless. I don’t want to be too dark but I genuinely didn’t think I would make it to 17.”

She continued: “I think about this one time I was in Berlin and I was alone in my hotel, and I remember there was a window right there. I remember crying because I was thinking about how the way that I was going to die was, I was going to do it.” 

Thankfully, Eilish didn't kill herself and credits her mom for saving her life. She also attended therapy often and relied on friends and family's support.

Now, when Eilish sees self harm scars on fans, she makes sure to speak to them. “I just grab [the fans] by the shoulders and I’m like, ‘Please take care of yourself and be good to yourself and be nice to yourself. Don’t take that extra step and hurt yourself further and you can’t take it back.”

Thank you Billie for Bravely opening up!

You can watch her full interview here.

If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), text “home” to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 or go to

Photo: Getty Images

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