The Strawberry Letter: He Needs To Freshen Up Everything

Dear Uncle Steve and Aunt Shirley,

I'm 28 years old and dating a man who is five years older than I am. We've been together for eight months, and he's someone I can see myself settling down with. He doesn't have any children, so that's a plus for me. The only issue we have is that he has sex with other ladies. He told me that even though he has sex with other women, I'm the only one he spends his time and money on. He said he doesn't want to cheat on me, so he's just getting some things out of the way before he settles down.

We talk about marriage and having children together, and he wants to be married before he is 40. I need to know if I should give the relationship more time or if I'm wasting my time. See, I've stayed at his house, and I can tell another female has been in his bed. I can tell a female has been wrapped up in the blanket on his couch. I have even seen dirty towels with makeup on them. I have told him that he should freshen up before I come over, but I guess he doesn't have the time. He acts like it's no big deal, but it does matter to me.

I feel like I don't have a choice but to share him with other women, but it makes me feel dirty because an older lady told me about soul ties and supposedly every time I sleep with him, I get tied to the souls of all the women he slept with or something like that. I want to be in a monogamous relationship, and I do not plan to share him forever. He gave me the key and the code to his alarm, so what's really going on with him? Is he serious about me?