The Strawberry Letter: If She Knew What I Knew

Dear Steve and Shirley,

I've been married for 28 years. My husband and I had our kids right after college, so we’re just getting to the point where we can enjoy life again as a couple. The first thing he wanted to do was try a threesome, and I was down to try anything with him. I was surprised by how much I liked it.

That threesome led us to group intimacy parties and swinging—and it’s a lot more exciting than threesomes. Now, we’re hooked on swinging. In March, we stayed at a resort that hosts a swingers weekend. We had so much fun that we already registered for the 2026 event.

I told my best friend about it, and she registered too. Since she hasn’t had any luck dating since her divorce, I’m always trying to get her out of the house. I invited her to a house party with my husband and me. It was a real party, not a swingers party, but I saw a guy that I had recently had sex with. I introduced him to my bestie, and they ended up hanging out all night and exchanging numbers.

Since then, they’ve been dating.

She told me that he hasn’t even tried to have sex with her, and I can’t believe it. He told her that he’s a lawyer and a youth pastor, has never been married, and is a devoted son. What he hasn’t told her is that he met me at a swingers party—and we’ve had sex twice.

So, I haven’t mentioned it to her either. She thinks she’s met Mr. Right and has no clue that he’s HUGE and he really is a good lover who loves swinging.

My husband says, as her bestie, I should warn her about this man.

How do I tell my bestie that I had sex with her perfect new man?