December 10, 2025 • 41 mins
Ben Maller talks about Philip Rivers signing with the Indianapolis Colts at age 44, if the Colts should throw him into the fire against the Seahawks, Rivers having to wait 5 more years to not make the Hall of Fame, and much more!
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
He we go.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Welcome. It's our number one, our number one of the
Ben Malis Show, the original recipe Ben Malae Show. Happy
Wednesday to you. It's the tenth day of December. A
reminder that you can watch these Mallard monologues on YouTube
on the Ben Malors Show YouTube page. You're nodding your head. Yes.
What about Benny Versus the Penny hot a show on
(00:23):
YouTube according to Tom Looney, And it's on YouTube right now.
Benny Versus the Penny new episode will be up later today.
May should to subscribe. All right, good job by you. Okay,
you're gonna do it. That's Benny Vspenny on YouTube. So
two channels follow both here in our number one, we
talk about the big Grandpa, what's the big picture on
(00:44):
the Philip Rivers move as he parachutes into Indianapolis to
save the day at age forty four like a Navy seal,
and should the Colts throw quarterback Philip Rivers into the
fire immediately Indianapolis playing Seattle that good Seahawks defense this weekend,
and since he's returning to the NFL, Philip Rivers will
(01:05):
have to wait five more years to not make the
Hall of fame. Is this a big deal, a little
deal or no deal? I point out the flaw in
the Philip Rivers Hall of Fame resume. We'll get to
that and more right now. Have a wonderful day. I
got three more hours of this to go, but here's
our number one. A great day for grandpas. Welcome in
(01:34):
the beginning of another night of the Ben Mahler Show.
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haileyon assist dot com. I see Supermarket Steve nodding his
head in approval. So some wild, wild rivers in the
NFL our lead out of Indianapolis. The Colts not a
(03:22):
playoff team at this moment, but they are the talk
of the town in the NFL. And years ago, I
ran a gossip website, a sports gossip website, and the
philosophy in our newsroom was that today's rumors or tomorrow's headlines,
in this case, yesterday's rumors or today's headlines. As it
has happened, yet again it happened. What is it? What
(03:44):
is it. What is it? What is it? What is it?
If you have not heard, I assume you know by
now you've connected the dots. You're not a complete moron.
The Indianapolis Colts have decided we are sighting on the
dotted line forty four year old old quarterback Philip Rivers.
He's back Philip Rivers out of retirement, signing him now
(04:08):
initially to the practice squad. That is a clerical move
by the Colts. You put him on the practice squad
to start. The move comes less than twenty four hours
after the story popped up in the gossip mill of
the NFL and Colts coach Shane Stiken confirming that Daniel
Jones snap crackle pop, he gone. He'll missed the rest
(04:32):
of the season and likely next season as well with
a popped achilles tendon. And Riley Leonard, who wasn't thought
of as any more than a developmental quarterback. And he's
got a bum right knee. Welcome to the club. So
he's dinged up and you've got a ripping. That's about
(04:53):
it at quarterback right now. So Rivers, who has not
taken a meaningful snap since the twenty twenty season, is
a January of twenty twenty one, a playoff game, which, oh,
by the ways, the last time the Colts made the playoffs.
And that's it. So this, this was the news that
we thought might happen. Well, now it's happened Alter eight
(05:14):
and five and they have gone back to Philip Rivers,
who has been coaching at Saint Michael High School in
Fair Hope, Alabama ever since. So that's good jumping off point.
Let us discuss the question for the esteem panel what
is the big picture? What is the big picture on
(05:35):
Philip Rivers parachuting in to save the day. It's like,
you're in a tough spot. Who are you gonna call,
Let's get a parashooter to come in here and save
the day. Philip Rivers at age forty four, parachuting in
to Indianapolis. So my thoughts on this, I've got bolow,
mother nature and better lighting, and we will combine all
(05:59):
of the things together and we are going to have
a smorgasborg of goodness is what we're going to have.
So a the way I look at the Philip Rivers
story as an outside party and just kind of observing,
it's like going to the zoo and you're not actually
where the elephants are. You're outside of where the elephants are.
(06:19):
But you're looking at the elephants and you're like, oh,
look at the trunk on that or that one's pooping.
Those two over there making whoopee. There's a lot going on.
There's a lot going on there. But this is binary,
is what it is. Right, it's black and white, it's
rise and fall. It's get a trophy or splatter or
make the playoffs or a splatter or something like that.
But really, to me, there's no middle ground on this.
(06:42):
There's no gray area. There's no little moral victory or
any of that mumbo jumbo, which some I'm sure we'll
toss out. The whole thing plays like a Hollywood reboot.
It's a Hollywood reboot. They're out of original ideas. We've
known that for years in Hollywood. And so they green
lighted Rivers the Return. No, it's right, the Rivers the
(07:03):
Return or is it a Netflix docu series? But the
opening scene I've already storyboarded it. So the opening scene
of this Rivers the Return, you've got Rivers changing his
grandson's diaper in a backwater town in the boondocks of Alabama,
surrounded by a whole lot of nothing, and he wipes
(07:26):
his hands, cleans the poop poo off the hands, and
then grabs his backpack and flies off to Indianapolis. And
suddenly he becomes the Bolo Tie Crusader. He's a sidekick.
It's kind of the Batman universe, right, the Bolo Tie Crusader.
And there he is leading the horse convoy down the
(07:50):
tunnel and then out the play game, Get the game.
And the fantasy ending here, of course, is the if
it's the Disney movie, then the Colts win the Chanceampionship
and Philip Rivers is the MVP. He holds up the
Lombardi Trophy. He's carried off the field a La Rudy
by his teammates who are young enough to be his kids,
(08:11):
and then goes back to Grandpa duty, and then you
fade to black, You roll the credits, and that's it.
Now there is an alternative cut on this flick, Rivers
the Return. So what would that be, you asked, I'll
tell you, thanks for asking that alternative cut for the
Philip Rivers film. Rivers plays about five snaps this weekend,
(08:35):
and Pop goes the Achalles, Snap, crackle, pop, and he
goes back to Alabama for surgery and boom or in
this case top boom movie over. That's it, turn out
the lads the parties over. Now, look, we again have
(08:57):
no skin in the game. We don't. And I think
it's gonna be fun. I'm looking I like fun. People
think I don't like fun. I like fun. I enjoy it.
I'm looking forward to this. And Indie ordered extra sauce
before the trade deadline, Sauce Gardner because they believe that
(09:17):
this Frankenstein concoction of a roster was good enough to
win the AFC. Right right now, they're not even a
playoff team. Playoffs. You got New England and Denver at
the top of the AFC. Now most believe that those
teams are beatable. You gotta get in the playoffs, though,
pretty sure you can't win the Super Bowl. No one's
(09:38):
ever won the Super Bowl if you don't get in
the playoffs. So you have to get into the playoffs.
That's the baseline. You got to get into the playoffs.
And so now they're gonna have a new general of
the Connival in Indianapolis and Colts football, though at least
for this weekend. We'll see if this goes okay, but
it becomes like nineteen nineties NBC television must see TV
(10:01):
for the Indianapolis cults. Here is this going to be
an epic train wreck? And if Rivers goes out there
and plays like our grandpa, I told you, I told
you can't play. Oh my god, what are they doing?
Oh my god. Of course, then if he plays well,
if it's a magic carpet rise, Oh it's so good.
I told you. Oh he's great. It's that kind of me.
(10:22):
So buckle up, bucker roo all right. Now, staying with
the theme of the hour, as the rivers flow, So
continuing the theme here, the state sponsored prob the news
service of the NFL, the NFL Network, the mouthpiece for
NFL propaganda. So the NFL Network tells us that Philip
(10:45):
Rivers has a quote very real chance of starting week
fifteen for the Colts as they take on Seattle this weekend.
So the question should the throw quarterback Philip Rivers into
the fire fire against the Seattle Seahawks. So my answer is,
(11:12):
oh my god, yes, yes, indian throw Philip Rivers into
the inferno and bring extra gasoline, bring a match or
cigarette light or whatever you got there and just have
a great time. Just bring some marshmallows, bring some chocolate,
some gram crackers who make some smores. And the man
(11:34):
is forty four years old, which I don't think. I
don't think you're on your deathbed at age forty four.
He's got that Grandpa energy, big Gramps energy, big Gramps.
He's I guess he's eligible when he goes to Seattle,
he can go out, have the early Bird Special and
knock himself out. And well, here's a when you bring
in a forty four year old quarterback who played like
(11:56):
a gazillion years in the NFL, that's the personification, the
epitome of out of the box quarterback. No assembly required
for Philip Rivers, right muscle memory takes over here. That's
how this goes. You don't stash that in your attic
like some forgotten Christmas decorations from years ago or like that.
(12:17):
And what you are saving him? What are you saving
him for? What's the point of saving him? Well, we
don't want to get him hurt because he's our future court. No,
he's going to be back in Fair Hope, Alabama coaching
high school football for the Warriors whatever they're called next year.
So that's it. Are you saving him for a rainy day?
(12:42):
Spoiler alert? Spiler alert? I looked at the forecast. Congratulations,
it's supposed to rain for the Colts in the Seahawks
game in Seattle. So mother Nature herself, Mother Nature is screaming,
play him. That's what she's literally, She's play him. She's
screamed that literally. So the Colts have as much choice
(13:04):
as a guy stuck in gridlock traffic. There's nut you're stuck.
You got to get where you're going, so you sit
in the traffic and there's really no other way to go.
And that's the Colts with Philip Rivers. And so the
recipe here for Shane Stike it's rather simple. It's straight
out of Michael Angelo's Chisel. And what you do here
(13:25):
is it's simplicity, is what it is. That's the key
to success. Simplicity. And you hand the ball Jonathan Taylor
like fifty times. You just keep running the ball and
you hand it to Taylor like you're handing out canoli's.
You get a canoli, you get a canoli, You get
a canoli, and you keep Rivers with the elementary school
(13:45):
passing offense, everything around the line of scrimmage. Maybe take
two or three shots down the field, but the rest
of it is crayons. It's not calculus with Philip Rivers
playing quarterback. So that's what you do, and you force
Sam Darnold to do Sam Arnold's trademark things, which is
sea ghosts, and very rarely does he have a full game.
(14:07):
We saw in fact, the Seattle team beat the crap
out of the Falcons. If you watch the game in
the first half, Sam Darnold is terrible in the first half.
So he has a bad half in this game if
it's the first half, and that sets the Colts up,
puts him in a good position here and then boom,
you're golden, golden, golden Goldan is what you are there,
(14:28):
and that's the cookbook, that's the recipe, and that's the gospel.
So that's what you do with Grandpa. Put him out there.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Now.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
Meanwhile, the last word on this as for the chatter,
oh my god, what about the gold jacket? What about
the gold jacket? Shove it up your tuckas with the
gold jacket. So the question here, since he is returning
to the NFL. Philip Rivers now will delay his opportunity
(14:59):
to get to the Hall of Fame. God forbid you
end up getting voted in the Hall of Fame and
still play. So Rivers will have to wait five more years,
all of the horror, five more years, and of course
the arguments will even make the Hall of Fame. Is
this a big deal, a little deal or no deal?
The fact that Philip Rivers is gonna have to wait
(15:20):
an extra five years to find out about the Hall
of Fame. So to me, it's no deal. None zip
bo squad douche is the way I would answer this.
And here's why. To me, this is not some kind
of added weight for Philip Rivers. It's not some kind
of conspiracy or controversy or anything like that. It is
(15:42):
a clerical pause. It's a clerical pause at the NFL
Bronze bust Morgue. Right now, I've been to Hall of Fames.
I don't have a problem with Hall of Fames. But
the issue is this the Hall of Fame. We spent
a lot of time on sports radio and sports you
know conversation talking about who's a Hall of Fame, who's
the goat it's a lot of our time is wasted
(16:05):
on this kind of stuff. And that's an actual goat
right there. But the Hall of Fame, it's if you
look at it, and I know I'm gonet killed for this,
I don't care. It doesn't matter. It looks great on
a post guard. And I'd like to go to the
Pro Football Hall of Fame someday. I'm not against it.
I'd like to go and check it out. However, when
(16:26):
you peel back the onion on the Pro Football Hall
of Fame, it's a mausoleum with better lighting. That's what
it is. It's you go there and it's like, I'd
much rather be in the Hall of Fame than a cemetery.
Most end up in cemetery, but I'd rather end up there.
And by the way, let's let's try not to look
(16:48):
at the will to Beast in the room. What is
the will the Beast in the room? Philip rivers, it
is an inconvenient truth. Does not have a Hall of
Fame resume. Oh my god, that's blasphemy. What do you
talking about? You lost your lightning boat? No, I have not.
Let me make my elevator pitch as to why in fact,
(17:08):
I would argue you never had a Hall of Fame resume,
and the guy was a horrible big game quebeck, which
is kind of my right, like, oh, he's gonna leave
the Colts to the super Bowl, which would change his
Hall of Fame trajectory, all right. Because this, if you
go back Philip Rivers in San Diego, you could make
the argument if he actually won. The Chargers had super
Bowl worthy teams multiple times when Rivers was there. If
(17:30):
they had won a super Bowl, they likely would have
convinced the politicians in San Diego to build the stadium. Therefore,
they would still be the San Diego Chargers. But Philip
Rivers was such a choke artist in big games that
they didn't get the funding, they didn't get the taxpayer money,
and so they ended up going to LA and doing
whatever they're doing in LA. But he was a terrible corback.
(17:51):
Zero super Bowls, one AFC title game in his time
in San Diego, four playoff wins in seventeen season. And
it's not like he was on bad teams. They were
usually pretty good. The Chargers were usually pretty good. Four
playoff wins seventeen seasons as charge at quarterback come on. Now,
I mean that's does that well he said, well, that's
(18:11):
our team award. Okay. He spent his whole career as
not the third wheel. Philip Rivers was like the fifth wheel.
When you look at his generation, the greatest quarterback generation
of all time, you had Tom Brady, Drew Brees, Peyton Manning,
Aaron Rodgers, and then Philip Rivers, who was like Ringo
(18:32):
Star if you get the reference. Okay, he was there,
but it's like other people were more important, like the
other ones were better, but.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
He was there.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
He was a Ringo Star was there, but you know,
he was a beatle, but the other ones were kind
of bigger deal. You know what I'm saying. You know,
it's like Ringo Star without the drumsticks. And never an
All Pro and that's a big one. That is a
big one. Never Philip Rivers never made an All Pro team.
He didn't even make a second team All Pro the
Pro Bowl. Nobody cares about the Pro Bow. They played.
(19:01):
They played tic tac toe and grab ass at the
Pro Bowl. They got rid of it. So he didn't
make the first or second team All Pro. Rivers. He
was never in the top two in the MVP voting. Ever,
I think he finished fourth one time, I believe. And
so that's not a Canton, Ohio resume. That's the that's
(19:23):
the waiting room with no magazines and that's it and
no Wi Fi. But what about the old time numbers?
What about the sixties something thousand yards passing and the
four hundred plus touchdowns and all that stuff, Well that
is Compiler nation is what the now you want to
go buy compiler. Eli Manning also not a Hall of Famer,
(19:45):
just average stiff quarterback, Eli Manning, And there are people
advocating for him to get in the Hall of Fame.
He shouldn't be in the Hall of Fame either, But
Philip Rivers is in the same boat with Eli Manning,
and so it's a bit of a problem. And it's
like the Compil Tyler stuff. It's like, all right, well
that's like Costco stuff, your volume discount stats. And so
(20:09):
in terms of delaying the Hall of Fame, is really
no decision at all to make. It's it's you don't
have to think about it because it's it's a no deal.
It's a nothing burger. In fact, that he likely will
not make the Hall of Fame. And if the Colts
were to win the Super Bowl and he would play well.
That would change his arc to get into the Hall
of Fame. It is the Ben Mahlor Show. You want
(20:30):
to comment on any of that. There are multiple ways
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(20:50):
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Later this hour, we'll have the who am I? Game?
(21:11):
Next hour, Mallard to the Third Degree, the Insta Trivia
will have the Riddle of the Day. Later on Too
Much or Not Enough The Queen of Hearts with Lorena,
and that's where we highlight the fact that the overnight
talk radio listener does not have to spell, does not
know how to spell Queen of Hearts, which is unfortunate.
Hashtag Queen of Hearts. If you want to send a
question to Lorain, you can do that right now and
(21:32):
then later on an hour four we'll have password the
word Game of the Stars passwords we have had to
look forward to straight ahead though. Is it true? Is
it true that a veteran seasoned NFL quarterback also not playing,
also not playing this season, was called by the Colts
(21:57):
and offered the job and turned it down before they
called Philip Rivers. We'll get to that and we will
do it next.
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Park Bensen everywhe glue screening calls, Raino is busting balls.
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You what then in their in.
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The air and everywhere, Park Ben malers.
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On over road, Pas touch the soul, he don't.
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He loves his stumps. The let's hissferts our stumps. We
mans hear the love, the bars.
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Banks thinking.
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Bendstupswise Us breaking free, Andreos, Drew.
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Brad So, I don't want to talk over it. It's Ohioal.
What a great gift. What a talented musician. Ohio Al's
is Bill Miller. You're locked in on the Ben Mahlor
Show as we are chopping down the overnight hours, just
(24:23):
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mallor holiday tune if you want to send one in,
there's still time and the company. It's our way of
fighting back against the corporate machine. Here the company is
(24:46):
mandated we play holiday music. Every single song must be
a holiday So is that correct. I'm not making it up,
so it is true.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
It is true.
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So our way of getting back at the company is
to play our own version, our own spin on holiday music.
And so the great song that was a wonderful job
by Ohio al Bravo, Bravo, Bravo. We'll get a lot
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it'll get a lot of a lot. Anyway, if you
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Queen and also Cooper Loop at all Bronco fan. Your
comments can and we'll be used against you in the
court of sports radio. So be aware of that. Andy
and Lionel Lakes Minnesota, right, since says a plus on
the mall monologue with seven kids, I think Philip Rivers
just wanted to get out of I think he's got ten.
(26:00):
Now don you have ten? Ten or eleven? I think
it's eleven? Yeah, now seven, that's just a warm up
back seven. Have we done a wellness check on his wife?
Is she okay? We are everything good on that? Okay,
there you go, says I, and he says I can relate.
Every guy needs a little piece and quiet. I was wrong,
it's only ten. Oh, it's only ten, okay, ten kids. Well, normally,
(26:25):
as men, we find our quiet time on the throne.
That is our that is our our spot. Or if
you have a man cave, you do that. Nah, women
like to invade the man cave. It's usually a very
cozy area. It is nice, nice sofa, good TV.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Your man likes to hang out in, so you usually gravity.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
Well, that's why you changed the lock on that. Ferg
Dog says the Chargers have the Midas touch. Every every
quarterback they touch turns the gold. Johnny United, is Dan Fouts,
Ryan Leave, Jim Harbaugh, Doug Fluteie, Drew Brees, Philip Rivers,
and just Herbert all great, just absolutely wonderful. King Roy says,
(27:04):
with the return of Philip Rivers to the NFL, is
there any uh, any at all possibility we'll see the
return of Colin Kaepernick? Or is that just a fever dream?
And he says, and if this was a Disney movie,
Philip Rivers would die and his oldest son would avenge
his honor and honor his father rather the life and
(27:27):
play quarterback. So oh like Moulin as I screwed that
up there, Late night drug tester says, I for one,
welcome back Philip Rivers to the NFL. Now the Bolo
Ties will make the return to the postgame prescomt bill.
Who's your bills? Is the Winter Olympics X games? Just
needs to buy need to buy them out? Name one
(27:49):
Winter game moment? What what? Why are you sending me
message about the Winter Olympic XIT? What is wrong with you?
Speaker 1 (27:56):
What?
Speaker 2 (27:57):
What kind of nonsense are you smoking or snorting or
whatever you're doing? Scrooge writes and says, hey, plus he's
in the younger demo, He'll soon be in the older demo,
but he's enjoying the fact he's in his youth, he says,
a plus on the Mallon monologue. Anyone who thinks that
choke artist Philip Rivers is a Hall of Famer should
not speak on football ever again. What happened to the
(28:19):
standards of NFL fans? All right? No, Stradinas says, looking
at the colts remaining games, they aren't winning more than
one an than one if any he says, there's no
benefit for Rivers just bruises. Maybe he just needs time
away from all those kids. Well, be careful those Tradenas.
(28:40):
And I know what's gonna happen if the Colts do
pull the upset here and he plays Mammoth upset no
Streudenas all of a sudden, I know how this works.
Let me tell you how this works. Okay, Suddenly the
radio station in Seattle will have the transmitter down. The
Wi Fi all over the greater Seattle area will and
(29:01):
No Streudenis will go into hiding. I know how that works.
I've been doing this for a while. Let's go to
the phones. Moving man. Matt a show legend early on
on the highways and byways of North America, hello, moving man,
mad what's going on.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
There? He is fake news? LA traffics not a big deal?
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Yeah? Are you sure about that?
Speaker 1 (29:29):
I mean it, I'm already up in Monterey.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
So well, what what time did you do?
Speaker 1 (29:34):
What time?
Speaker 2 (29:35):
What time did you drive through l A five o'clock?
M okay, I mean, it's typically horrific. But if if
you worked for you, good for you. That's is there
some kind of event that we need to know about?
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Wonderful?
Speaker 2 (29:50):
What freeways were you in?
Speaker 6 (29:52):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Six? Uh? I cut over and throw s Denis.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
And okay, so like the fifty seven, ninety one two
ten yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, well good for you. Normally
take normally it takes about two hours to get anywhere,
so yeah, I only lost.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
About a half hour, so its yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
Well unlike unlike unlike your your homeland in Boston where
you just put the traffic underground so you can't see
the traffic because it's all undergrounds.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Yeah I was, I was actually going to give you
an eight plus plus.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
On your monologue. I know, I know, I know I
wouldn't kill.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
You, just couldn't read it because somewhere, ELI mean costs
you thousands of dollars I'm guessing you to take the
shot at them.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
Well, it wasn't a shot. It was an accurate portrayal
of the events that took place. That's that's what that was.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
You know.
Speaker 2 (30:58):
It is acapsulation, a thumbnail recap of his career.
Speaker 1 (31:04):
It's not healthy for you, then.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
I'm fine. I'm perfectly fine. I just do it. The
show your blood pressure, ben I, it's you know. I
didn't get a lott. I actually did not get a
ton of sleep. I just took a caffeine. I went
out to my car. I got some caffeine because I
don't drink coffee, but I got a caffeine something because
I got asked to go on New Zealand Raiders. I've
already been on the radio on Wednesday. They called me up.
They said the only time they could do it was
(31:29):
right when I was sleeping. So I woke up and
I couldn't go back to sleep, So I I got
about three hours of sleep, which is not doctor recommended.
It's not doctor.
Speaker 1 (31:39):
Recommended probably about where I'm going to be at.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
More importantly, do you have your your sidekick with you?
Speaker 1 (31:46):
I do not. That was the first bit of breaking
newsic oh no oh, no, Louis is at home.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
Okay, Okay, okay, Louis okay, though.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
He's okay, Okay. You know there's a chance they may
have to fly home for Christmas. No, okay, we were
just down ahead of it, just in case.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
So it's either fly home for Christmas or miss the
family on Christmas or those the two options.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
Well, that's not an option.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
That's not an option. So okay, So you might make
it back, but if not, you'll fly back. I got you,
all right.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
Well, it's I gotta deliver in Virginia and it's a
matter of can I get the trailer empty? And because
we have eight kids, I don't show up on Christmas Eve, like, hey,
what's going on? Yo? I have to be there at
least by the twenty third to help her with last
minute stuff.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
So eight are you? You are your grandfather here?
Speaker 1 (32:42):
No, we're not. We're not all right, I'm way too
young and hit for that. Yes.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Click. When you think hip, you think moving man, Matt.
When I think cool, I think moving man Matt for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:57):
The second bit of break news I want to share
is as a bring it to your general I have
increased your listenership night by one. Well, my buddy, my buddy,
John Sweeney is well, I know, we don't do shoutouts.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
No, we don't. We we don't. We do we do,
we do mentions. I'll do a mention for John. I
can't do a shout out for John because we're not
a morning show. As you know, Matt, we don't do
a morning drive. You get paid a lot more money
in morning drive or afternoon drive or even middays, and
we're not that. We're it's two different worlds in radio.
There's daytime radio and nighttime radio. We do nighttime radio,
so we can't do shoutouts. So John, you've known him
(33:36):
for a while.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
You just met this guy, no known him a long time,
and he's he's also driving tonight, and.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Well, hello John, fred I asked you to.
Speaker 1 (33:45):
Bring the energy for our hour one because I knew
it was gonna be the end of my drive. Did
not fail me.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
It's not over you. I still have twenty minutes to
f this up. I can still screw up this out
if you want.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
That's that's that is a you know what. Just don't
take a blind.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
Yeah, all right, well I will attempt to avoid that.
I gotta go, but thank you, Matt, be safe out there,
and calls again, all right, is Matt moving up the
West coast? That guy's he's going for it. He's traveling
all the ready. Make that money, great caller, make a
lot of money if you drive a moving truck. But
you gotta, you gotta really just dedicate your life to it. Man,
(34:26):
he's on the road, on the road again. Yeah, he's
been just about everywhere. But would hurt if I had
to sit that much? Yeah, Like I guess I said
a lot here too, though I should stand. Yeah, And
when I stand, people get upset when people, and I'll
stand up and that I'm standing. You don't have to
announce your standing. There's no need to announce it. I'm standing.
(34:47):
Before the Colts decided to sign Philip Rivers, is it
true they contacted another quarterback and we're rejected that? According
to well we're hearing here, the Colts did reach out
out to Derek Carr, the former Raider and New Orleans Saint,
and Derek Carr said, I'm good. I'm good. I don't
(35:11):
want to play. So if I'm mistaken, that is the
second NFL team that Derek Carr has rejected, you might
remember if you go back in the hot top time machine,
the Cincinnati Bungals. When Joe Burrow went down with the injury,
the Bengals reached out and said, hey, car, how would
you like to come to Cincinnati? He said no. The
(35:31):
argument then was if I remember, and I'd have to
go back and check my notes. But the argument I
believe was, hey, Carr didn't want to go there because
he knew that Joe Burrow was going to come back
at some point and he didn't want to be usurped
by Joe Burrow. You can't make that same argument with
the Colts. You cannot make that same argument because Daniel
(35:51):
Jones didn't establish himself as a forever quarterback and he's hurt.
So even if he is the guy, he's going to
be out all of next year anyway with the Achilles injury.
So it sounds like Card doesn't want to play. I
know those are two teams that you know, Cincinnati, those
two wide receivers. You say, that's at the time they
were thought of as a playoff team, and the Colts
right there borderline down the stretch could make the playoffs
(36:15):
and Car to want to play. Time now for the
who am I? Game? And here we go. Every quarterback
in every quarterback in the Hall of Fame the last
fifty plus years since nineteen seventy has at least one
All Pro selection except me, says so I'm the one
giving the question. Here's the who am I? Game?
Speaker 1 (36:35):
Again?
Speaker 2 (36:35):
Every quarterback in the Pro Football Hall of Fame since
nineteen seventy has at least one All Pro selection except me.
I'm out, I'm the outlier. Who am I? That is
the question, the answer, and we are going to have
and it's time we have to play of the day
as well. We'll get to all that. We will do
it next.
Speaker 4 (36:54):
Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Meler
Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific Ray.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
Here's the beat.
Speaker 3 (37:01):
Doom Doom, Doom, Doom Boom, Doom, Doom Boom, Doom doom boom.
Senecalls doom boom going straight to the yay Yo Pop
Doom Doom Boom. Sena callsop but doom but doom going
straight to the yeay Yo Pop Doom Doom Boom, Miss
Doom be dooom boom for doom but doom boom. The
(37:22):
doom a doom boom doom with doom boom donkey, but
doom bodom boom Hoh, but doom and doom boom hoh,
but doom b doom boom ho.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Hey, morning time, Ricky, you're Maryland right there, and it
is I Bill Miller the Ben Maller Show. Reminder that
this show Mallard monologues are featured on YouTube. Now we
have a competition here. It's every show against every other show,
So we need your help. I know some of you guys,
I'm not on YouTube. I don't do the White I
can even don't do the Internet. But trust me, we
(37:53):
need your help on that. So U follow the Ben
Maler Show page on YouTube if you're in the younger
demo like Scrooge. Like Scrooge is on YouTube and who
supermarket Steve some of these guys. So two channels, Ben
Malor Show and then Benny Vspenny Benny Vspenny, the iconic
Benny Versus Penny now a global audience on Benny Versus
(38:15):
the Penny and a couple of winning weeks in a row,
which really upsets the trolls. The trolls don't like when
we pick games, right, They bothers them. There'll be a
new episode up later today for the Thursday night NFL
game on Benny Vspenny the YouTube channel. So follow those channels.
All right back to it we go before we get
to the payoff on the who am I?
Speaker 5 (38:36):
Game?
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Time Now for the play of the day, the rare
inappropriate college basketball player of the day. Now by you,
I'm told that's a good college basketball team. They're in
the top ten. We're playing Clemson in something called the
Jimmy V Classic. Now BYU has the player projected to
be the top pick in the twenty twenty six NBA draft,
(38:57):
aj the Benz I believe is his name him? He's
like a kind of a swing guy, small forward. This
game came down to the end and it was not him,
but it was somebody else that got it done for
b YU take a list. With one point three to go,
it's gotta be quick. Poskovic in to rob shoots from
three dude road, Brad. Wow, what for BYU? No game
(39:24):
with three wow? Got off and the Kochs win it
sixty seven sixty four wow.
Speaker 1 (39:31):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
You know why because the Cougars are coming. The Cougars
are coming. The cougars are coming and there it is
the tire Iraq play of the night. For over forty
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(39:53):
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raq dot com the way tire buying should be. Here's
the payoff on the who am I? Game? So every
quarterback the last fifty plus years, every quarterback that has
(40:15):
ended up making the Hall of Fame, the Pro Football
Hall of Fame has had at least one all Pro
selection except me. I am the outlier. Who am I?
That is the question? What is the answer? Malaprop guy
says moving man, Matt Oh, there's a good cartoon drawing
of moving man man. Who else do we have? Vanna
White is still hot, according to Manuel in Guardiana. Is
(40:37):
that true? I haven't seen Vana White and wild. I
bet she's gorgeous. She's a lovely lady. My apologies to her.
David Akers from Scrooge in the Bay Area, Dick Trickle
Nascar legend from Random Ryan in Carolina Rock give me
a little taste of that Dick Stick and Dayton Robin
the goat Man going with Richard Pryor comedy genius Richard Pryor.
(40:58):
Who else do we have? Page down? Ken the Snake
Stabler from Andy and Lino Lakes, Minnesota. Clark's Christmas Gift
from Just Josh Femi is going with Kurt Warner as
his answer. Michigan legend Braylen Edwards from Shane and des Moines,
Eric the Actor from Alf the Alien The Howard Stern reference,
(41:21):
Kirk mccasko, Good name by mister nice Guy. Mid nineteen
eighties Angel legend brock Lesnar from King Rory, Joe Burrow
who is twenty nine today from Late Night Drug tester,
Manny Sanghian from Robin, Minnesota, Ron Jeremy from Not a Burner. Wow,
do you have an answer? Lorraine up the Abominable Snowman
Ben No, It's Buffalo Bill's legend. Jim Kelly never made
(41:45):
All Pro status, but isn't the Hall of Fame because
he got the four straight Super Bowls.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
Wow.
He we go.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Welcome. It's our number one, our number one of the
Ben Malis Show, the original recipe Ben Malae Show. Happy
Wednesday to you. It's the tenth day of December. A
reminder that you can watch these Mallard monologues on YouTube
on the Ben Malors Show YouTube page. You're nodding your head. Yes.
What about Benny Versus the Penny hot a show on
(00:23):
YouTube according to Tom Looney, And it's on YouTube right now.
Benny Versus the Penny new episode will be up later today.
May should to subscribe. All right, good job by you. Okay,
you're gonna do it. That's Benny Vspenny on YouTube. So
two channels follow both here in our number one, we
talk about the big Grandpa, what's the big picture on
(00:44):
the Philip Rivers move as he parachutes into Indianapolis to
save the day at age forty four like a Navy seal,
and should the Colts throw quarterback Philip Rivers into the
fire immediately Indianapolis playing Seattle that good Seahawks defense this weekend,
and since he's returning to the NFL, Philip Rivers will
(01:05):
have to wait five more years to not make the
Hall of fame. Is this a big deal, a little
deal or no deal? I point out the flaw in
the Philip Rivers Hall of Fame resume. We'll get to
that and more right now. Have a wonderful day. I
got three more hours of this to go, but here's
our number one. A great day for grandpas. Welcome in
(01:34):
the beginning of another night of the Ben Mahler Show.
We are in the air of rewhere eyeball to eyeball,
as we have Savory Creation's coast to coast, border to
border and beyond on the vast and stylishly powerful microphones
(01:55):
of fs are emmnating live from the huddle as we
huddle up together here from the world famous Fox Sports
Radio Studios, as approved by Hoosher Bill, who knows that
this portion of the Ben Maler Show made possible in
part by our friends at tire Iraq. For over forty years,
(02:17):
ty Iraq has been helping customers like Malarprop Guy, Alf
the Alien Opiner and Ferd Dog find the right tires
for how, what and where they drive. Ship fast and
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installation ti iraq dot com, the way tire buying should
(02:39):
be and moving Man Matt On the Highways and Byways
of North America says, well, wait a minute, what about Haleyon.
Well that's right, Matt, good job by you. Every goal
starts with an assist on and off the field. That's
why Haleyon and US Soccer are launching for the Assist,
a celebration of every day acts of support that helped
(03:01):
people achieve their goals with iconic brands like Censin, nine Toms,
will Tarn, Advil, and Centrum. To learn more, go to
haileyon assist dot com. I see Supermarket Steve nodding his
head in approval. So some wild, wild rivers in the
NFL our lead out of Indianapolis. The Colts not a
(03:22):
playoff team at this moment, but they are the talk
of the town in the NFL. And years ago, I
ran a gossip website, a sports gossip website, and the
philosophy in our newsroom was that today's rumors or tomorrow's headlines,
in this case, yesterday's rumors or today's headlines. As it
has happened, yet again it happened. What is it? What
(03:44):
is it. What is it? What is it? What is it?
If you have not heard, I assume you know by
now you've connected the dots. You're not a complete moron.
The Indianapolis Colts have decided we are sighting on the
dotted line forty four year old old quarterback Philip Rivers.
He's back Philip Rivers out of retirement, signing him now
(04:08):
initially to the practice squad. That is a clerical move
by the Colts. You put him on the practice squad
to start. The move comes less than twenty four hours
after the story popped up in the gossip mill of
the NFL and Colts coach Shane Stiken confirming that Daniel
Jones snap crackle pop, he gone. He'll missed the rest
(04:32):
of the season and likely next season as well with
a popped achilles tendon. And Riley Leonard, who wasn't thought
of as any more than a developmental quarterback. And he's
got a bum right knee. Welcome to the club. So
he's dinged up and you've got a ripping. That's about
(04:53):
it at quarterback right now. So Rivers, who has not
taken a meaningful snap since the twenty twenty season, is
a January of twenty twenty one, a playoff game, which, oh,
by the ways, the last time the Colts made the playoffs.
And that's it. So this, this was the news that
we thought might happen. Well, now it's happened Alter eight
(05:14):
and five and they have gone back to Philip Rivers,
who has been coaching at Saint Michael High School in
Fair Hope, Alabama ever since. So that's good jumping off point.
Let us discuss the question for the esteem panel what
is the big picture? What is the big picture on
(05:35):
Philip Rivers parachuting in to save the day. It's like,
you're in a tough spot. Who are you gonna call,
Let's get a parashooter to come in here and save
the day. Philip Rivers at age forty four, parachuting in
to Indianapolis. So my thoughts on this, I've got bolow,
mother nature and better lighting, and we will combine all
(05:59):
of the things together and we are going to have
a smorgasborg of goodness is what we're going to have.
So a the way I look at the Philip Rivers
story as an outside party and just kind of observing,
it's like going to the zoo and you're not actually
where the elephants are. You're outside of where the elephants are.
(06:19):
But you're looking at the elephants and you're like, oh,
look at the trunk on that or that one's pooping.
Those two over there making whoopee. There's a lot going on.
There's a lot going on there. But this is binary,
is what it is. Right, it's black and white, it's
rise and fall. It's get a trophy or splatter or
make the playoffs or a splatter or something like that.
But really, to me, there's no middle ground on this.
(06:42):
There's no gray area. There's no little moral victory or
any of that mumbo jumbo, which some I'm sure we'll
toss out. The whole thing plays like a Hollywood reboot.
It's a Hollywood reboot. They're out of original ideas. We've
known that for years in Hollywood. And so they green
lighted Rivers the Return. No, it's right, the Rivers the
(07:03):
Return or is it a Netflix docu series? But the
opening scene I've already storyboarded it. So the opening scene
of this Rivers the Return, you've got Rivers changing his
grandson's diaper in a backwater town in the boondocks of Alabama,
surrounded by a whole lot of nothing, and he wipes
(07:26):
his hands, cleans the poop poo off the hands, and
then grabs his backpack and flies off to Indianapolis. And
suddenly he becomes the Bolo Tie Crusader. He's a sidekick.
It's kind of the Batman universe, right, the Bolo Tie Crusader.
And there he is leading the horse convoy down the
(07:50):
tunnel and then out the play game, Get the game.
And the fantasy ending here, of course, is the if
it's the Disney movie, then the Colts win the Chanceampionship
and Philip Rivers is the MVP. He holds up the
Lombardi Trophy. He's carried off the field a La Rudy
by his teammates who are young enough to be his kids,
(08:11):
and then goes back to Grandpa duty, and then you
fade to black, You roll the credits, and that's it.
Now there is an alternative cut on this flick, Rivers
the Return. So what would that be, you asked, I'll
tell you, thanks for asking that alternative cut for the
Philip Rivers film. Rivers plays about five snaps this weekend,
(08:35):
and Pop goes the Achalles, Snap, crackle, pop, and he
goes back to Alabama for surgery and boom or in
this case top boom movie over. That's it, turn out
the lads the parties over. Now, look, we again have
(08:57):
no skin in the game. We don't. And I think
it's gonna be fun. I'm looking I like fun. People
think I don't like fun. I like fun. I enjoy it.
I'm looking forward to this. And Indie ordered extra sauce
before the trade deadline, Sauce Gardner because they believe that
(09:17):
this Frankenstein concoction of a roster was good enough to
win the AFC. Right right now, they're not even a
playoff team. Playoffs. You got New England and Denver at
the top of the AFC. Now most believe that those
teams are beatable. You gotta get in the playoffs, though,
pretty sure you can't win the Super Bowl. No one's
(09:38):
ever won the Super Bowl if you don't get in
the playoffs. So you have to get into the playoffs.
That's the baseline. You got to get into the playoffs.
And so now they're gonna have a new general of
the Connival in Indianapolis and Colts football, though at least
for this weekend. We'll see if this goes okay, but
it becomes like nineteen nineties NBC television must see TV
(10:01):
for the Indianapolis cults. Here is this going to be
an epic train wreck? And if Rivers goes out there
and plays like our grandpa, I told you, I told
you can't play. Oh my god, what are they doing?
Oh my god. Of course, then if he plays well,
if it's a magic carpet rise, Oh it's so good.
I told you. Oh he's great. It's that kind of me.
(10:22):
So buckle up, bucker roo all right. Now, staying with
the theme of the hour, as the rivers flow, So
continuing the theme here, the state sponsored prob the news
service of the NFL, the NFL Network, the mouthpiece for
NFL propaganda. So the NFL Network tells us that Philip
(10:45):
Rivers has a quote very real chance of starting week
fifteen for the Colts as they take on Seattle this weekend.
So the question should the throw quarterback Philip Rivers into
the fire fire against the Seattle Seahawks. So my answer is,
(11:12):
oh my god, yes, yes, indian throw Philip Rivers into
the inferno and bring extra gasoline, bring a match or
cigarette light or whatever you got there and just have
a great time. Just bring some marshmallows, bring some chocolate,
some gram crackers who make some smores. And the man
(11:34):
is forty four years old, which I don't think. I
don't think you're on your deathbed at age forty four.
He's got that Grandpa energy, big Gramps energy, big Gramps.
He's I guess he's eligible when he goes to Seattle,
he can go out, have the early Bird Special and
knock himself out. And well, here's a when you bring
in a forty four year old quarterback who played like
(11:56):
a gazillion years in the NFL, that's the personification, the
epitome of out of the box quarterback. No assembly required
for Philip Rivers, right muscle memory takes over here. That's
how this goes. You don't stash that in your attic
like some forgotten Christmas decorations from years ago or like that.
(12:17):
And what you are saving him? What are you saving
him for? What's the point of saving him? Well, we
don't want to get him hurt because he's our future court. No,
he's going to be back in Fair Hope, Alabama coaching
high school football for the Warriors whatever they're called next year.
So that's it. Are you saving him for a rainy day?
(12:42):
Spoiler alert? Spiler alert? I looked at the forecast. Congratulations,
it's supposed to rain for the Colts in the Seahawks
game in Seattle. So mother Nature herself, Mother Nature is screaming,
play him. That's what she's literally, She's play him. She's
screamed that literally. So the Colts have as much choice
(13:04):
as a guy stuck in gridlock traffic. There's nut you're stuck.
You got to get where you're going, so you sit
in the traffic and there's really no other way to go.
And that's the Colts with Philip Rivers. And so the
recipe here for Shane Stike it's rather simple. It's straight
out of Michael Angelo's Chisel. And what you do here
(13:25):
is it's simplicity, is what it is. That's the key
to success. Simplicity. And you hand the ball Jonathan Taylor
like fifty times. You just keep running the ball and
you hand it to Taylor like you're handing out canoli's.
You get a canoli, you get a canoli, You get
a canoli, and you keep Rivers with the elementary school
(13:45):
passing offense, everything around the line of scrimmage. Maybe take
two or three shots down the field, but the rest
of it is crayons. It's not calculus with Philip Rivers
playing quarterback. So that's what you do, and you force
Sam Darnold to do Sam Arnold's trademark things, which is
sea ghosts, and very rarely does he have a full game.
(14:07):
We saw in fact, the Seattle team beat the crap
out of the Falcons. If you watch the game in
the first half, Sam Darnold is terrible in the first half.
So he has a bad half in this game if
it's the first half, and that sets the Colts up,
puts him in a good position here and then boom,
you're golden, golden, golden Goldan is what you are there,
(14:28):
and that's the cookbook, that's the recipe, and that's the gospel.
So that's what you do with Grandpa. Put him out there.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Now.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
Meanwhile, the last word on this as for the chatter,
oh my god, what about the gold jacket? What about
the gold jacket? Shove it up your tuckas with the
gold jacket. So the question here, since he is returning
to the NFL. Philip Rivers now will delay his opportunity
(14:59):
to get to the Hall of Fame. God forbid you
end up getting voted in the Hall of Fame and
still play. So Rivers will have to wait five more years,
all of the horror, five more years, and of course
the arguments will even make the Hall of Fame. Is
this a big deal, a little deal or no deal?
The fact that Philip Rivers is gonna have to wait
(15:20):
an extra five years to find out about the Hall
of Fame. So to me, it's no deal. None zip
bo squad douche is the way I would answer this.
And here's why. To me, this is not some kind
of added weight for Philip Rivers. It's not some kind
of conspiracy or controversy or anything like that. It is
(15:42):
a clerical pause. It's a clerical pause at the NFL
Bronze bust Morgue. Right now, I've been to Hall of Fames.
I don't have a problem with Hall of Fames. But
the issue is this the Hall of Fame. We spent
a lot of time on sports radio and sports you
know conversation talking about who's a Hall of Fame, who's
the goat it's a lot of our time is wasted
(16:05):
on this kind of stuff. And that's an actual goat
right there. But the Hall of Fame, it's if you
look at it, and I know I'm gonet killed for this,
I don't care. It doesn't matter. It looks great on
a post guard. And I'd like to go to the
Pro Football Hall of Fame someday. I'm not against it.
I'd like to go and check it out. However, when
(16:26):
you peel back the onion on the Pro Football Hall
of Fame, it's a mausoleum with better lighting. That's what
it is. It's you go there and it's like, I'd
much rather be in the Hall of Fame than a cemetery.
Most end up in cemetery, but I'd rather end up there.
And by the way, let's let's try not to look
(16:48):
at the will to Beast in the room. What is
the will the Beast in the room? Philip rivers, it
is an inconvenient truth. Does not have a Hall of
Fame resume. Oh my god, that's blasphemy. What do you
talking about? You lost your lightning boat? No, I have not.
Let me make my elevator pitch as to why in fact,
(17:08):
I would argue you never had a Hall of Fame resume,
and the guy was a horrible big game quebeck, which
is kind of my right, like, oh, he's gonna leave
the Colts to the super Bowl, which would change his
Hall of Fame trajectory, all right. Because this, if you
go back Philip Rivers in San Diego, you could make
the argument if he actually won. The Chargers had super
Bowl worthy teams multiple times when Rivers was there. If
(17:30):
they had won a super Bowl, they likely would have
convinced the politicians in San Diego to build the stadium. Therefore,
they would still be the San Diego Chargers. But Philip
Rivers was such a choke artist in big games that
they didn't get the funding, they didn't get the taxpayer money,
and so they ended up going to LA and doing
whatever they're doing in LA. But he was a terrible corback.
(17:51):
Zero super Bowls, one AFC title game in his time
in San Diego, four playoff wins in seventeen season. And
it's not like he was on bad teams. They were
usually pretty good. The Chargers were usually pretty good. Four
playoff wins seventeen seasons as charge at quarterback come on. Now,
I mean that's does that well he said, well, that's
(18:11):
our team award. Okay. He spent his whole career as
not the third wheel. Philip Rivers was like the fifth wheel.
When you look at his generation, the greatest quarterback generation
of all time, you had Tom Brady, Drew Brees, Peyton Manning,
Aaron Rodgers, and then Philip Rivers, who was like Ringo
(18:32):
Star if you get the reference. Okay, he was there,
but it's like other people were more important, like the
other ones were better, but.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
He was there.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
He was a Ringo Star was there, but you know,
he was a beatle, but the other ones were kind
of bigger deal. You know what I'm saying. You know,
it's like Ringo Star without the drumsticks. And never an
All Pro and that's a big one. That is a
big one. Never Philip Rivers never made an All Pro team.
He didn't even make a second team All Pro the
Pro Bowl. Nobody cares about the Pro Bow. They played.
(19:01):
They played tic tac toe and grab ass at the
Pro Bowl. They got rid of it. So he didn't
make the first or second team All Pro. Rivers. He
was never in the top two in the MVP voting. Ever,
I think he finished fourth one time, I believe. And
so that's not a Canton, Ohio resume. That's the that's
(19:23):
the waiting room with no magazines and that's it and
no Wi Fi. But what about the old time numbers?
What about the sixties something thousand yards passing and the
four hundred plus touchdowns and all that stuff, Well that
is Compiler nation is what the now you want to
go buy compiler. Eli Manning also not a Hall of Famer,
(19:45):
just average stiff quarterback, Eli Manning, And there are people
advocating for him to get in the Hall of Fame.
He shouldn't be in the Hall of Fame either, But
Philip Rivers is in the same boat with Eli Manning,
and so it's a bit of a problem. And it's
like the Compil Tyler stuff. It's like, all right, well
that's like Costco stuff, your volume discount stats. And so
(20:09):
in terms of delaying the Hall of Fame, is really
no decision at all to make. It's it's you don't
have to think about it because it's it's a no deal.
It's a nothing burger. In fact, that he likely will
not make the Hall of Fame. And if the Colts
were to win the Super Bowl and he would play well.
That would change his arc to get into the Hall
of Fame. It is the Ben Mahlor Show. You want
(20:30):
to comment on any of that. There are multiple ways
you can reach us in the modern world. Yes, the
modern world. You can do it on the phones. Everyone's
got their phone. Many of our callers have Obama phones.
You can call up if you don't have one, doesn't matter.
Eight seven seven ninety nine on Fox. That is a
toll free number in the United States. You'll have to
(20:50):
pay for it if you're one of our international listeners.
But eight seven seven ninety nine on Fox. That's eight
seven seven nine nine six six three sixty nine. Also
on the the X Machine at Ben Mahlor. It's at
Ben Mahlor if you'd like to be part of the program.
Later this hour, we'll have the who am I? Game?
(21:11):
Next hour, Mallard to the Third Degree, the Insta Trivia
will have the Riddle of the Day. Later on Too
Much or Not Enough The Queen of Hearts with Lorena,
and that's where we highlight the fact that the overnight
talk radio listener does not have to spell, does not
know how to spell Queen of Hearts, which is unfortunate.
Hashtag Queen of Hearts. If you want to send a
question to Lorain, you can do that right now and
(21:32):
then later on an hour four we'll have password the
word Game of the Stars passwords we have had to
look forward to straight ahead though. Is it true? Is
it true that a veteran seasoned NFL quarterback also not playing,
also not playing this season, was called by the Colts
(21:57):
and offered the job and turned it down before they
called Philip Rivers. We'll get to that and we will
do it next.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on
Fox Sports Radio and the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 5 (22:19):
Fox Sports Radio is taking over YouTube and you can
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search Fox Sports Radio, hit that subscribe button and smash
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with Mike Harmon, and The Ben Maller.
Speaker 4 (22:43):
Show, Fox Sports Radio on.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
YouTube, Subscribe, hit that thumbs up icon and comment away.
Speaker 6 (22:53):
Park Bensen everywhe glue screening calls, Raino is busting balls.
Speaker 7 (23:08):
Van starts kissing every warm, Jack goodfle is z gone,
James barely home myself to make cuts.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
You what then in their in.
Speaker 6 (23:27):
The air and everywhere, Park Ben malers.
Speaker 7 (23:35):
On over road, Pas touch the soul, he don't.
Speaker 6 (23:42):
He loves his stumps. The let's hissferts our stumps. We
mans hear the love, the bars.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
Banks thinking.
Speaker 6 (23:54):
Bendstupswise Us breaking free, Andreos, Drew.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
Brad So, I don't want to talk over it. It's Ohioal.
What a great gift. What a talented musician. Ohio Al's
is Bill Miller. You're locked in on the Ben Mahlor
Show as we are chopping down the overnight hours, just
(24:23):
beginning the red eye flight. We have yet to reach
our cruising altitude. If you'd like to be part of
this show, and you can interact with us on the
phones at eight seven seven ninety nine on Fox. Another
mallor holiday tune if you want to send one in,
there's still time and the company. It's our way of
fighting back against the corporate machine. Here the company is
(24:46):
mandated we play holiday music. Every single song must be
a holiday So is that correct. I'm not making it up,
so it is true.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
It is true.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
So our way of getting back at the company is
to play our own version, our own spin on holiday music.
And so the great song that was a wonderful job
by Ohio al Bravo, Bravo, Bravo. We'll get a lot
of airplay because it has Loraina's name in it, so
it'll get a lot of a lot. Anyway, if you
would like to submit a song, you can send it
(25:16):
care of Benmallor show at gmail dot com. It's Benmallor
Show at gmail dot com. But put songs in the headlines.
Get a lot of spam email on that account. A
lot of random, crazy people send me emails. So make
sure you put that that in the headline their song,
and if you're crazy, I'll just deleat it anyway. But
you can do that. Also on the X machine at
Ben Malor you can saylo to Loraea d NFSR Tech
(25:39):
Queen and also Cooper Loop at all Bronco fan. Your
comments can and we'll be used against you in the
court of sports radio. So be aware of that. Andy
and Lionel Lakes Minnesota, right, since says a plus on
the mall monologue with seven kids, I think Philip Rivers
just wanted to get out of I think he's got ten.
(26:00):
Now don you have ten? Ten or eleven? I think
it's eleven? Yeah, now seven, that's just a warm up
back seven. Have we done a wellness check on his wife?
Is she okay? We are everything good on that? Okay,
there you go, says I, and he says I can relate.
Every guy needs a little piece and quiet. I was wrong,
it's only ten. Oh, it's only ten, okay, ten kids. Well, normally,
(26:25):
as men, we find our quiet time on the throne.
That is our that is our our spot. Or if
you have a man cave, you do that. Nah, women
like to invade the man cave. It's usually a very
cozy area. It is nice, nice sofa, good TV.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Your man likes to hang out in, so you usually gravity.
Speaker 2 (26:44):
Well, that's why you changed the lock on that. Ferg
Dog says the Chargers have the Midas touch. Every every
quarterback they touch turns the gold. Johnny United, is Dan Fouts,
Ryan Leave, Jim Harbaugh, Doug Fluteie, Drew Brees, Philip Rivers,
and just Herbert all great, just absolutely wonderful. King Roy says,
(27:04):
with the return of Philip Rivers to the NFL, is
there any uh, any at all possibility we'll see the
return of Colin Kaepernick? Or is that just a fever dream?
And he says, and if this was a Disney movie,
Philip Rivers would die and his oldest son would avenge
his honor and honor his father rather the life and
(27:27):
play quarterback. So oh like Moulin as I screwed that
up there, Late night drug tester says, I for one,
welcome back Philip Rivers to the NFL. Now the Bolo
Ties will make the return to the postgame prescomt bill.
Who's your bills? Is the Winter Olympics X games? Just
needs to buy need to buy them out? Name one
(27:49):
Winter game moment? What what? Why are you sending me
message about the Winter Olympic XIT? What is wrong with you?
Speaker 1 (27:56):
What?
Speaker 2 (27:57):
What kind of nonsense are you smoking or snorting or
whatever you're doing? Scrooge writes and says, hey, plus he's
in the younger demo, He'll soon be in the older demo,
but he's enjoying the fact he's in his youth, he says,
a plus on the Mallon monologue. Anyone who thinks that
choke artist Philip Rivers is a Hall of Famer should
not speak on football ever again. What happened to the
(28:19):
standards of NFL fans? All right? No, Stradinas says, looking
at the colts remaining games, they aren't winning more than
one an than one if any he says, there's no
benefit for Rivers just bruises. Maybe he just needs time
away from all those kids. Well, be careful those Tradenas.
(28:40):
And I know what's gonna happen if the Colts do
pull the upset here and he plays Mammoth upset no
Streudenas all of a sudden, I know how this works.
Let me tell you how this works. Okay, Suddenly the
radio station in Seattle will have the transmitter down. The
Wi Fi all over the greater Seattle area will and
(29:01):
No Streudenis will go into hiding. I know how that works.
I've been doing this for a while. Let's go to
the phones. Moving man. Matt a show legend early on
on the highways and byways of North America, hello, moving man,
mad what's going on.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
There? He is fake news? LA traffics not a big deal?
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Yeah? Are you sure about that?
Speaker 1 (29:29):
I mean it, I'm already up in Monterey.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
So well, what what time did you do?
Speaker 1 (29:34):
What time?
Speaker 2 (29:35):
What time did you drive through l A five o'clock?
M okay, I mean, it's typically horrific. But if if
you worked for you, good for you. That's is there
some kind of event that we need to know about?
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Wonderful?
Speaker 2 (29:50):
What freeways were you in?
Speaker 6 (29:52):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Six? Uh? I cut over and throw s Denis.
Speaker 2 (30:03):
And okay, so like the fifty seven, ninety one two
ten yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, well good for you. Normally
take normally it takes about two hours to get anywhere,
so yeah, I only lost.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
About a half hour, so its yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
Well unlike unlike unlike your your homeland in Boston where
you just put the traffic underground so you can't see
the traffic because it's all undergrounds.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Yeah I was, I was actually going to give you
an eight plus plus.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
On your monologue. I know, I know, I know I
wouldn't kill.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
You, just couldn't read it because somewhere, ELI mean costs
you thousands of dollars I'm guessing you to take the
shot at them.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
Well, it wasn't a shot. It was an accurate portrayal
of the events that took place. That's that's what that was.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
You know.
Speaker 2 (30:58):
It is acapsulation, a thumbnail recap of his career.
Speaker 1 (31:04):
It's not healthy for you, then.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
I'm fine. I'm perfectly fine. I just do it. The
show your blood pressure, ben I, it's you know. I
didn't get a lott. I actually did not get a
ton of sleep. I just took a caffeine. I went
out to my car. I got some caffeine because I
don't drink coffee, but I got a caffeine something because
I got asked to go on New Zealand Raiders. I've
already been on the radio on Wednesday. They called me up.
They said the only time they could do it was
(31:29):
right when I was sleeping. So I woke up and
I couldn't go back to sleep, So I I got
about three hours of sleep, which is not doctor recommended.
It's not doctor.
Speaker 1 (31:39):
Recommended probably about where I'm going to be at.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
More importantly, do you have your your sidekick with you?
Speaker 1 (31:46):
I do not. That was the first bit of breaking
newsic oh no oh, no, Louis is at home.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
Okay, Okay, okay, Louis okay, though.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
He's okay, Okay. You know there's a chance they may
have to fly home for Christmas. No, okay, we were
just down ahead of it, just in case.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
So it's either fly home for Christmas or miss the
family on Christmas or those the two options.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
Well, that's not an option.
Speaker 2 (32:17):
That's not an option. So okay, So you might make
it back, but if not, you'll fly back. I got you,
all right.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
Well, it's I gotta deliver in Virginia and it's a
matter of can I get the trailer empty? And because
we have eight kids, I don't show up on Christmas Eve, like, hey,
what's going on? Yo? I have to be there at
least by the twenty third to help her with last
minute stuff.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
So eight are you? You are your grandfather here?
Speaker 1 (32:42):
No, we're not. We're not all right, I'm way too
young and hit for that. Yes.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Click. When you think hip, you think moving man, Matt.
When I think cool, I think moving man Matt for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:57):
The second bit of break news I want to share
is as a bring it to your general I have
increased your listenership night by one. Well, my buddy, my buddy,
John Sweeney is well, I know, we don't do shoutouts.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
No, we don't. We we don't. We do we do,
we do mentions. I'll do a mention for John. I
can't do a shout out for John because we're not
a morning show. As you know, Matt, we don't do
a morning drive. You get paid a lot more money
in morning drive or afternoon drive or even middays, and
we're not that. We're it's two different worlds in radio.
There's daytime radio and nighttime radio. We do nighttime radio,
so we can't do shoutouts. So John, you've known him
(33:36):
for a while.
Speaker 1 (33:36):
You just met this guy, no known him a long time,
and he's he's also driving tonight, and.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
Well, hello John, fred I asked you to.
Speaker 1 (33:45):
Bring the energy for our hour one because I knew
it was gonna be the end of my drive. Did
not fail me.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
It's not over you. I still have twenty minutes to
f this up. I can still screw up this out
if you want.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
That's that's that is a you know what. Just don't
take a blind.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
Yeah, all right, well I will attempt to avoid that.
I gotta go, but thank you, Matt, be safe out there,
and calls again, all right, is Matt moving up the
West coast? That guy's he's going for it. He's traveling
all the ready. Make that money, great caller, make a
lot of money if you drive a moving truck. But
you gotta, you gotta really just dedicate your life to it. Man,
(34:26):
he's on the road, on the road again. Yeah, he's
been just about everywhere. But would hurt if I had
to sit that much? Yeah, Like I guess I said
a lot here too, though I should stand. Yeah, And
when I stand, people get upset when people, and I'll
stand up and that I'm standing. You don't have to
announce your standing. There's no need to announce it. I'm standing.
(34:47):
Before the Colts decided to sign Philip Rivers, is it
true they contacted another quarterback and we're rejected that? According
to well we're hearing here, the Colts did reach out
out to Derek Carr, the former Raider and New Orleans Saint,
and Derek Carr said, I'm good. I'm good. I don't
(35:11):
want to play. So if I'm mistaken, that is the
second NFL team that Derek Carr has rejected, you might
remember if you go back in the hot top time machine,
the Cincinnati Bungals. When Joe Burrow went down with the injury,
the Bengals reached out and said, hey, car, how would
you like to come to Cincinnati? He said no. The
(35:31):
argument then was if I remember, and I'd have to
go back and check my notes. But the argument I
believe was, hey, Carr didn't want to go there because
he knew that Joe Burrow was going to come back
at some point and he didn't want to be usurped
by Joe Burrow. You can't make that same argument with
the Colts. You cannot make that same argument because Daniel
(35:51):
Jones didn't establish himself as a forever quarterback and he's hurt.
So even if he is the guy, he's going to
be out all of next year anyway with the Achilles injury.
So it sounds like Card doesn't want to play. I
know those are two teams that you know, Cincinnati, those
two wide receivers. You say, that's at the time they
were thought of as a playoff team, and the Colts
right there borderline down the stretch could make the playoffs
(36:15):
and Car to want to play. Time now for the
who am I? Game? And here we go. Every quarterback
in every quarterback in the Hall of Fame the last
fifty plus years since nineteen seventy has at least one
All Pro selection except me, says so I'm the one
giving the question. Here's the who am I? Game?
Speaker 1 (36:35):
Again?
Speaker 2 (36:35):
Every quarterback in the Pro Football Hall of Fame since
nineteen seventy has at least one All Pro selection except me.
I'm out, I'm the outlier. Who am I? That is
the question, the answer, and we are going to have
and it's time we have to play of the day
as well. We'll get to all that. We will do
it next.
Speaker 4 (36:54):
Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Meler
Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific Ray.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
Here's the beat.
Speaker 3 (37:01):
Doom Doom, Doom, Doom Boom, Doom, Doom Boom, Doom doom boom.
Senecalls doom boom going straight to the yay Yo Pop
Doom Doom Boom. Sena callsop but doom but doom going
straight to the yeay Yo Pop Doom Doom Boom, Miss
Doom be dooom boom for doom but doom boom. The
(37:22):
doom a doom boom doom with doom boom donkey, but
doom bodom boom Hoh, but doom and doom boom hoh,
but doom b doom boom ho.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Hey, morning time, Ricky, you're Maryland right there, and it
is I Bill Miller the Ben Maller Show. Reminder that
this show Mallard monologues are featured on YouTube. Now we
have a competition here. It's every show against every other show,
So we need your help. I know some of you guys,
I'm not on YouTube. I don't do the White I
can even don't do the Internet. But trust me, we
(37:53):
need your help on that. So U follow the Ben
Maler Show page on YouTube if you're in the younger
demo like Scrooge. Like Scrooge is on YouTube and who
supermarket Steve some of these guys. So two channels, Ben
Malor Show and then Benny Vspenny Benny Vspenny, the iconic
Benny Versus Penny now a global audience on Benny Versus
(38:15):
the Penny and a couple of winning weeks in a row,
which really upsets the trolls. The trolls don't like when
we pick games, right, They bothers them. There'll be a
new episode up later today for the Thursday night NFL
game on Benny Vspenny the YouTube channel. So follow those channels.
All right back to it we go before we get
to the payoff on the who am I?
Speaker 5 (38:36):
Game?
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Time Now for the play of the day, the rare
inappropriate college basketball player of the day. Now by you,
I'm told that's a good college basketball team. They're in
the top ten. We're playing Clemson in something called the
Jimmy V Classic. Now BYU has the player projected to
be the top pick in the twenty twenty six NBA draft,
(38:57):
aj the Benz I believe is his name him? He's
like a kind of a swing guy, small forward. This
game came down to the end and it was not him,
but it was somebody else that got it done for
b YU take a list. With one point three to go,
it's gotta be quick. Poskovic in to rob shoots from
three dude road, Brad. Wow, what for BYU? No game
(39:24):
with three wow? Got off and the Kochs win it
sixty seven sixty four wow.
Speaker 1 (39:31):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
You know why because the Cougars are coming. The Cougars
are coming. The cougars are coming and there it is
the tire Iraq play of the night. For over forty
five cougars are coming hold. For over forty years, Tyrak
has been helping customers like Big Daddy in Memphis find
the right tires for how, what and where they drive,
(39:53):
ship fast and freeback by free road hazard protection with
convenient installation options like mobile tire installation, which makes legally
blind Christopher very happy even though he can't drive. Tire
raq dot com the way tire buying should be. Here's
the payoff on the who am I? Game? So every
quarterback the last fifty plus years, every quarterback that has
(40:15):
ended up making the Hall of Fame, the Pro Football
Hall of Fame has had at least one all Pro
selection except me. I am the outlier. Who am I?
That is the question? What is the answer? Malaprop guy
says moving man, Matt Oh, there's a good cartoon drawing
of moving man man. Who else do we have? Vanna
White is still hot, according to Manuel in Guardiana. Is
(40:37):
that true? I haven't seen Vana White and wild. I
bet she's gorgeous. She's a lovely lady. My apologies to her.
David Akers from Scrooge in the Bay Area, Dick Trickle
Nascar legend from Random Ryan in Carolina Rock give me
a little taste of that Dick Stick and Dayton Robin
the goat Man going with Richard Pryor comedy genius Richard Pryor.
(40:58):
Who else do we have? Page down? Ken the Snake
Stabler from Andy and Lino Lakes, Minnesota. Clark's Christmas Gift
from Just Josh Femi is going with Kurt Warner as
his answer. Michigan legend Braylen Edwards from Shane and des Moines,
Eric the Actor from Alf the Alien The Howard Stern reference,
(41:21):
Kirk mccasko, Good name by mister nice Guy. Mid nineteen
eighties Angel legend brock Lesnar from King Rory, Joe Burrow
who is twenty nine today from Late Night Drug tester,
Manny Sanghian from Robin, Minnesota, Ron Jeremy from Not a Burner. Wow,
do you have an answer? Lorraine up the Abominable Snowman
Ben No, It's Buffalo Bill's legend. Jim Kelly never made
(41:45):
All Pro status, but isn't the Hall of Fame because
he got the four straight Super Bowls.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
Wow.
Host
Ben Maller
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