Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kaboom. If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred
minutes a week was enough, think again. He's the last
remnants of the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness.
He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as
the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow, it's the
clearinghouse of hot takes. Break free for something special. The
(00:22):
Fifth Hour with Ben Maller starts right now in the
air everywhere your podcast needs have been met. The fifth Hour, well,
we'll see about that. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller
and Danny G Radio because four hours a night in
(00:45):
the overnight not enough during the week, and this podcast
available eight days a week. It is a spinoff of
the Overnight Show. But Danny G who is not part
of the Overnight Show, He's part of Covino and Rich
and we form Vultron here. Danny, we bring the shows together.
We used to work on my show. So yeah, alumni
(01:08):
from twenty fourteen to twenty eighteen and beyond. Yeah, it's
like four years you've graduated and then you moved on
to something else, and then and I'm still I haven't graduated.
I'm still doing the same bullcrap that we did before.
But but on this podcast, Danny g as, we begin
a brand new weekend in Easter weekend, Will anyone listen?
(01:28):
By the time we get to Sunday and the mail bag,
we'll find out we're gonna have a big Easter egg
mail bag. It's also it's passed over weeks, so no
eating a bread and there's a lot of stuff going on.
There's a lot of stuff going on right now this
time of the year, and so this podcast, we've got
a two hour tour, a two hour tour, a brief
(01:51):
mini update Safari Kingdom. I know that's your favorite, Danny,
you love Safari Kingdom. Yeah, it's original, con nobody else
has that. No one's ever done that. It's really revolutionary.
We're setting a new standard in podcasting. I know there's
like five with four million podcast I heard something on
(02:12):
four million podcast I saw that stat. Yeah, three point
nine million podcasts. How do they know that? That's a
good question. And who's listening to all these podcasts? Is anyone?
Is it friends and family only for most of these podcasts?
Is that what it is? Sean and Phoenix while he
delivers food, Yeah, I love that. I post every week
(02:33):
for questions on the mailbag and inevitably at hand to God,
I'm not making this up. Sean and Phoenix is almost
always the first person to post. Now, does Sean post
a question? No, does Sean post a comment? Not really?
Sean and Phoenix post his itinerary delivering for Amazon. Yes,
(02:54):
it's a screenshot of his deliveries for that day, and
it gives you the total and shows you his commission. Yeah.
And as an added bonus, he then complains if he
has to go all the way out to like Scottsdale
about that is, why don't they have me delivering eighty
eight packages in Scottsdale in two hours? I don't understand.
(03:17):
I don't get it anyway. So we had a lot
to get to, but we'll begin with this. So I
had a very interesting weekend last weekend. Danny, my wife's like, hey,
there's this event. You know. She's a nine one one
dispatcher and the police station that she works at was
part of this massive event that takes place in the
(03:39):
Greater Loss Vegas area. Put baby and my wife had
wanted to go to this for years. She had never
been to this event, and she wanted to volunteer, and
so she asked me whether I wanted to be part
of this, and I said, sure. It sounds like sounds
like a lot of fun and it's it's great. So
(03:59):
I'm gonna ask you, Danny, have you ever heard of
Baker to Vegas? Have you ever heard of that? No?
I know Baker, but I've never heard of Baker to Vegas. Okay, good,
because I had never heard of it either. I don't
work in law enforcement. I do radio. You do radio.
We don't know what this is. This is only like
a law enforcement thing. So what it is. First of all,
(04:22):
every year, this thing's been going on for like thirty years,
they have a race from the middle of the California Desert,
which is not necessarily the middle, but it's in the
desert in Baker, California. When I think of Baker, I
think of the mad Greek bun Boy, the beef Jerky
(04:43):
place that the Alien Beef Jerky which is out there,
and some random fast food players. I usually try to
go through Baker on my way to Vegas. It's like
the last stop before you get to Nevada. There's a
taco bell and they screwed up our order and when
we got to the window. The lady couldn't speak English.
She said, what you got, which has got always good.
(05:04):
So so there's a few facts. It's like literally one
street and there's a restaurants, and there's there's a hotel,
and I think the hotel closed. So anyway, wood boards
on the windows, that's a bad sign. Yeah. Baker to
Vegas is the event. It is a one hundred and
twenty mile race. It's a relay race on pavement. It
(05:30):
doesn't go down the main drag that goes through Baker,
the city and to Vegas. It goes on the back
roads through the desert of California and and also Nevada
into through through that part of Nevada across and then
down to Vegas. So anyway, I didn't even know there
(05:51):
was a different way to go. I had no idea either.
This was an eye opening experience and this thing is
massive if you live in that world where you're in
law enforcement. We're talking over eight thousand runners from and
also guests and family members. I was a volunteer support staff,
(06:13):
which I guess I was part of. Twenty stages. Each
police officer men and women. They run five to seven
or eight miles each, but it's one hundred and twenty
miles and it doesn't make Sometimes it's hot, sometimes it's
called whatever. It's a it's a big deal. And when
I say this is a global event, Danny, you I
(06:35):
saw police from Berlin, Australia, was there, NYPD, bunch of
southern California, mostly southern California, but there were there were
police law enforcement from all over the world that were
part of this thing. And I didn't even heard of it.
So anyway, to make a long story even longer, I
(06:56):
mentioned that my wife asked if I wanted to help
and we could volunteer, we could make it a weekend
in Vegas, and I'm sure, why not? So we drove
to Vegas on Friday from the Mallard mansion. You want
to take a guess how many hours it took for
us to get to Vegas on a Friday afternoon, Danny,
(07:19):
you want to take a shot at that. What do
you I'm gonna say a total of eight hours on
the road. It was. It was close to that. It
was about seven seven and a half hours, so it
was almost it was close to eight hours we took.
It was most of it was just getting out of
the Greater La area, and it was it was ridiculous.
(07:41):
And we got out to the road. We of course
had to stop because you know, Danny, when you go
on a road trip with a wife, you gotta stop.
You gotta stop, you gotta eat. So we went to
Peggy Sues Diner. You ever been to Peggy Sues Diner.
I've driven past it, never stepped inside. It's in your
mom my moll, it's your moll. And it was really
(08:05):
good ambiance at Peggy sus Niner. Food was not so good,
but the ambiance was good. And then we went to
Eddie's World. Eddie World, not Eddie's World. They couldn't afford
the s and we walked through there got some random,
random stuff. So we had that going on, and we
got to Vegas. It took it took like seven hours
to get to Vegas. It was ridiculous, but we had
(08:27):
to get there because there was a meeting for the
Baker to Vegas thing. We were part of the team
for my wife's police station, which actually joined forces with
two other local police stations. Like I had no idea
how competitive, how intense this was. I thought it was
like a little relay raised and I said, okay, big deal.
But why I was like, listen. She said, we go
(08:49):
to this meeting. We have a two hour commitment to
volunteer on Saturday, and the rest of the time we're
just going to be partying in Vegas. So I said, okay,
it's a two hour tour. And much like my youth
when I watched it, I used to watch reruns of
Gilligan's Island. It was a faithful story, Danny, the two
(09:11):
hour tour. So we go to this meeting on Friday.
We were late to the meeting. We go into this
suite at the which hotel was a Cosmopolitan hotel on
like the forty seventh floor of the Cosmopolitan Hotel. Somebody
had to come down take it. So we go in there. Everybody,
there's music playing, there's a party going on. We had
(09:32):
missed the meeting. We had missed me and so one
of the people said, all right, here's what you need
to do. And when I found out what we need
to do, we said, you gotta be there on Saturday.
You gotta be at the hotel one thirty. We'll give
you the car to drive. You have to drive some
of the runners to their leg of the race to
this baker to Vegas. The so like, okay, and then
(09:56):
there's it's a two person operation. I'm the driver, my
wife was supposed to be the spotter. That was the plan.
So okay, whatever. So we go out there. They have
all kinds of snacks and water and things. I mean,
it was really loaded. I got more free stuff there
than I've gotten working radio the last few years. I mean,
they had all kinds of stuff, so it was it
(10:16):
was cool that part. It was cool. They'd refrigerator in
the suite, they had all these snacks in the in
the Did you have an empty duffel bag handy? Now
unfortunately I did not, but but they had some good stuff.
I was impressed. And when we got there on Friday night,
they had a dinner catered Italian dinner was catered with
(10:37):
fetacchini alfredo. There was some chicken. I was like, all right,
they're taking care of us, and all I have to
do is do two hours. We found out what exactly
we had to do. So we show up on Friday.
Now I'm completely worn out dating when I drive seven
hours in traffic, like most people, I'm like, I don't
(10:59):
want to do it anything. I just want to I
want to be in the car. Whatever. So we go
to this meeting. The race is underway. This thing goes
on for like twenty four hours, over twenty four hours
a bit. So we go to the meeting and they
explain what we have to do, and they give me
the keys to the car. They said, the valet has
(11:19):
got the car. Go down to the valet. You get
the car. Fine, go down to the valet. My wife
is given a plastic bag with a vest and some
flashlights and some paperwork. And they have very strict rules
because it's a law enforcement thing. So they have all
these rules and information you have to follow, and you
(11:40):
can't drive too fast. We get our assignment and hand
to God. Our assignment was to drive three different runners,
these three officers to stage nine, ten and eleven or
it was it was it was eight, nine and ten
I think it was. So it's three stages and the
(12:05):
drop off point Stage eight was in Perrump, Nevada. Wow,
I have been there before. I had never been to Perumpt, Nevada.
Now keep in mind it was past Perumpt, Nevada. This
was go to Perromp. Turn left, go into California. Go
(12:29):
back across the state line, back in, Danny. Here's what
I know of perumpt Nevada. I know three things about
Prompt Nevada. I know that my favorite overnight radio host
of all time, What Are the Greats, A legend immortal
Art Bell, did his show from perumpt Nevada. I know
(12:54):
that I watched a show that was on I forget
what channel. It was about a small TV station. I
think we talked about it on the podcast. It was
a small TV station, cable station that was based in
perumpt Nevada. I knew that. I also knew the whorehouses
are in perumpt Nevada, like the Bunny Ranch, and those
(13:15):
things are based in that town. That's all I knew.
So we drive out. It's an hour and a half drive.
Now keep in mind, Danny, they told my wife told
me two hours, and she was told two hours. So
we drive an hour and a half. But then they're like,
well wait a minute. You have to follow the runners
around and you have to wait because there's three different runners.
(13:38):
So you drop a runner off, they then get the baton,
they run their leg of the race. You then have
to drive ahead of the race, which means you have
to drive on this desert road, but you can't drive
too fast or that's a penalty. You drive very slow
and you have to you have to go around the runner,
(14:00):
and there's cars following the runners. It's a whole thing.
We then had to go to the next stage and
drop the other runner off and then pick up the
runner that had just been dropped off. But wait, there's more.
So we had to do it three times. Now. Needless
to say, this was not a two hour thing. It
took an hour and a half to drive out there.
You want to take us a guest, Danny, how many
hours we spent dropping runners off and picking runners up
(14:25):
and then driving back to Vegas the same amount of
time it took for you to get to Vegas from
La Probably seven probably right around seven hours, how about
eight hours? So now I'm pissed, right, I'm like, what
the fuck have I done? You know? These are my
(14:47):
You know how it is, we talk, We wear our
mind out with these radio shows, and on the weekend
I want to decompress, and I'm like, I'm doing a
good mitzvah. But now I'm getting burned. And by the
time we got back. It was night. We started out
at one thirty in the afternoon and by the time
we got back it was nine thirty at night. By
(15:08):
the time we dropped the car keys off and got
back to the to the hotel, and we had no food,
no cell reception for most of this, and it was
it was just just craziness, just And then to make
matters even better, we had to get back to La
Saturday night because my wife had to work on Sunday
(15:32):
kind of early in the day, so she had to
get back. So we're like, all right, we'll go out,
and she met some of her friends at one of
the hotels and I hung out. I was like the
third wheel. I hung out and then we were going
to drive back, like overnight. We're gonna drive back overnight.
But I would say, of all my trips to Vegas
(15:52):
in terms of actual entertainment value, it's pretty low. It's
pretty low on the list. This was This was a
working trip and I love that, you know, it was
cool to be part of it. I didn't realize it
was nearly what it was. This challenge cup relay thing
that they have and and all that. But how about
next time you let the secret out, let us know
(16:16):
what we're getting into. That would have been good, That
would have been a nice thing. I'm just saying one
thing that was cool about Perump, and there's not much
cool about Perump. But when I saw the police cars
in the fire truck, they said nig County. That of
course is Art Bell. Art Bell would famously say from
(16:39):
the Kingdom of ni for years. You hear that, and
it's foreign to you because you've never been anywhere near
it or seen it. Pretty cool to drive through that
little town, Yeah, it was, and I was upset because
we didn't have time. There's an art Bell statue or
tribute to Art Bell in a park in Perump, and
considering how big Rump is, there's like one park, so
(17:01):
I could probably find it. Unfortunately I did not have time.
So at some point in my life maybe next year,
if we do this next year, I'll have to pump.
And they should have just told you it is a
ten hour day, but we really appreciate you guys. We're
gonna feed you while you're out on the road. We're
(17:22):
gonna take care of you. And then you would have
been like, man, it was only eight hours, it wasn't ten.
Oh I left an important detail out, Danny, a very
important detail. So we're driving the car provided by the police.
It's just a regular truck, it's just their vehicle. So
they gave us, they gave me the keys of the truck,
so I'm driving it whatever. And the way this works,
(17:44):
whoever dropped the truck go off is supposed to fill
the truck up with gas. So we did not have
enough gas. We almost ran out of gas in the
middle of nowhere because this was past Perump, and you know, Danny,
there's no nothing in Paromp. There's nothing outside of Permp.
So we almost ran out of gas on the back roads.
(18:05):
And it is stunning to be I no idea. I've
gone to Vegas for thirty years of my life. I
had no idea that there these roads even existed in
the middle of nowhere. You can go from California to Nevada,
from from Baker to Perump. But we went to the
gas station literally on fumes, less than half a quarter
(18:26):
of a tank, and even I think we probably had
about twenty miles left in that truck by the time
we got to the gas station. And if that gas
stations had been out of gas, we would have been
totally up Shit's Creek through Perump, but to go north,
I had no idea that you could take those little
(18:47):
roads into Vegas. I didn't know that existed. And then
my question is when traffic gets so bottled up, why
don't people go on those little back roads. First of all,
most don't know about it, as you said. Secondly, it's
pretty barren enough. It was. I was driving at night
and there is nothing. I felt like I was on
(19:08):
the moon or something like that. So people would just
be too scared because you're living in the middle of
bum fuck Egypt. Well, you have no phone reception the grid,
so if your car breaks down, you're at the mercy
of the coyotes and traders out in the Nevada and
California desert. So it was an interesting I'll have some more.
(19:29):
I got another amazing thing I'll save for later on
this weekend, the mini update, the Minnesota update. Mallard Meet
and Greet, Mallard Meet and Greet. It is coming up
May twentieth. May twentieth is the date. A lot of
listeners have been tweeting about this in Minneapolis. Danige, I'm
fired up. This is gonna be great. I have done
(19:52):
two of these since COVID ended. We had a very
small get together last minute in Appleton, Wisconsin with a
few listeners, and then last year you were part of
that one in Cali. Danny in La we had a
meet and greet which was a lot of fun. And
so I'm looking forward to answer a question. Do we
have a venue yet? No, we don't have a venue.
(20:13):
I have been in touch with her, Gina. I'd also
like to thank you Angelina. And there's a couple other
listeners who I'm forgetting bad job by me who have
been boots on the ground. They've been traveling around contacting
calling people in Minnesota. So we have a couple of
possibilities at this point. One of them is on a lake,
(20:33):
another of them is in downtown, and the third one,
if that one happens, that's a very sporty one. That's
all I'll say. It's a very sporty one. And I'm
waiting to lock that down. Once we lock it down
and I get the green light right now, it's a
yellow light or a red light. Once we get the
green light, I'll of course let you know. And I
(20:54):
wanted to throw this out, So this is I'm just
asking you, if you want to tech me, let me know.
The Mallard Meet and Greet. So I've been talking to
some people about shirts and different Mallard malicious stuff. I'm
going full Rob Parker, Danny, I'm going full Rob Parker.
I'm gonna put shirts out there, whatever, slap a bet
Mallar logo on it. Moment. Come on, moh man, you
(21:18):
can't do that as Rob Parker's material, mom Man. Anyway,
So there's a possibility of a special limited edition Mallard
Meet and Greet Minnesota shirt. Now, unfortunately it's not free.
I wish it was free. I just give it out
to everybody. It would there would be a price on it.
(21:38):
A is that something that you would want and be
if you do want it, are you willing to actually
pay for it? That's the question. So if I'm gonna
go forward this because the person making them, obviously, I
need to know roughly how many people want the shirt.
And I think what I'll do, Danny, is I'll have
a pre order thing on the Instagram and page, yeah Facebook,
(22:02):
and that way, if we get a certain number, then
we'll get the shirt, and if not, we won't do
the shirt. I think that's what we're gonna do. You
are truly a rock star. This is turning in to
a concert in Minnesota with the concert t shirt available?
Hey why not? You got Hey, it's all about the marketing, Danny.
As you know, it's all about the marketing. Where is
the tour bus with the groupies giving both jobs? We're
(22:26):
not allowed to talk about that. We will go out
on Lake Minnetonka and the love boat will recreate the
love boat out there, mikings, and in all that, we
have a we have a little time. Let's do pop
goes the culture? You want to go? Pop goes the culture? Ohio,
ow yes, let's do it. Okay. These are stories that
(22:58):
we have a found sound randomly. You're not sporty stories.
So Tinder, this is I thought of this when I
saw this, Dandy, because I thought of you when I
saw this. Yeah, you were. You're happily married now, but
you were. You were known for giving out dating advice
and you loved the Tinder right it was your go
to spot. Yeah, that's where our term tinder owning came from. Exactly.
(23:23):
So Tinder is working on a secret five hundred dollars
a month version of the app that will include what
do you get for five hundred dollars a month? Bunch
of hookers and cocaine? Better get laid? No, it's twenty
four seven dating advice and access to its most active
(23:46):
and influential members. What the hell does that mean? That
means to me? That means rich people, famous people. That's
what it sounds like to me. Doesn't that sound like influential?
Active influential if you're kind of But would it be
like Instagram famous people? Because I mean, we've heard stories
here and there about an actress or two that try
(24:09):
Tinder out, but there can't be that many of them. Yeah,
I don't know the answer that. It says Tinder a
Vault would go above and beyond. They already have three
paid subscriptions on Tinder, and they confirmed this week that
there's this next next level. Wow, I guess this is
(24:31):
for rich people who are not very confident in their
dating skills and right, because otherwise you just do there's
twenty nine nine version here. Wouldn't you just do that?
Of course? Yeah? Five hundred dollars a month, it says
Vault would have to It says it would cost subscribers
(24:53):
up to six thousand dollars a year. Well, if you're
if you're paying five hundred, you should only have to
pay it for like a month or two. Shouldn't that
be it got any sort of game whatsoever? Yeah, I mean,
I guess if you just did it one time for
five hundred dollars. But man, that still seems kind of
steep when you can do it for thirty bucks or
(25:15):
the old fashioned way and just go to a go
to a pool hall or a bar or a pool hall.
He just made me think of the Pinocchio cartoon where
he goes to the pool hall. Oh why not? Next up,
Scarlet Joe Hanson, I know this is She has explained
(25:36):
why she is not on Instagram's explained she says, quote,
my ego is too fragile. I can't deal with it.
Talking about social media, she said she's just too fragile.
She's like a delicate little flower. Oh so she can't
(25:57):
take any bad calms or feedback from pictures and things
like that. She's not a fan of the trolls. My
experience with celebrities is most celebrities, it's overwhelming. You're the greatest,
we love you. There's always the troll element, the people
that are on there just to be complete assholes. Especially
(26:19):
it's not Twitter. Instagram is a little healthier, I would say,
especially for the celebrities, as you just pointed out, So
you're right. I would think ninety nine point nine percent
of anything she posted, unless it was corny or overly corporate,
or her like really trying to sell something that was
(26:40):
dog shit, I don't think she would get a whole
bunch of trolls. Yeah, I agree with you. I agree
with you. Next up, China is planning on repurposing those
old jets, those old fighter jets. This will cause nightmares, Danny.
They're considering a plan that would turn those old fighter
(27:01):
jets into an army of combat drones. Oh man, so
big remote control jet fighters? Exactly. They take these Cold
War era Soviet aircraft and turn them into drones and
(27:22):
without they don't need a pilot in the cockpit because
it's a drone. So how crazy is that? Man? Ready
to bring the gas? What a world many? So will
Dodger Stadium have these just beyond the outfield fence for
Friday night? Drone night? Yeah, drone night sounds like a
(27:43):
good idea. In Milwaukee, they'll have it, but they'll have
the roof closed in Milwaukee. So that's at the Brewer Games.
Did you see how the Dodgers replaced the fireworks with
drone shows? I did not know, did they? Is that right?
I didn't know. Yeah, yeah, last Friday night instead of
the fireworks, it was a light show with choreographed drones
(28:04):
or that just that week? Are they gonna that's a
good question. I didn't hear if that was going to
be a regular thing or not. Yeah, I did not.
I did not hear that. I did. My favorite story
of the week was the Brewers on opening day when
they had the flyover and they had the dome clothes.
That is a ten. Did you hear that? I hear
the Jets they had fireworks and a military flyover which
(28:29):
I believe costs four hundred thousand dollars minimum. And that
was as of a few years ago. Oh yeah, yeah.
Speaking of military, the Pentagon is said to have footage
of UFOs being shot down, but they are refusing to
release any of it. Danny. But the good news is
there is video. Did you you guys? On? Covino and
(28:52):
Rich talk about this video, which claims to show a
dead alien found in a Bolivian village to the UFO landed.
Have you seen this? No you have not, Okay, let
me grab the link here. I want to send this
to you. And when you see this, Danny, I don't know.
I don't want to spoil it for you, because when
(29:15):
I saw it, I was like, wait a minute, here,
this is dead alien. That's it. That's the alien. A
little blue thing, A little blue thing, Danny, that's the aliens.
It's the size of a chihuahua. Oh, come on, man,
(29:38):
you don't buy that. You don't think that's real. Wouldn't
it be awesome, Danny? If that is a fucking real
alien and we are all we've all been programmed to think, oh,
that's bullshit, and that's actually wouldn't that be hilarious? If
that's what they look like. It looks like a little
stuffed dolled an eight year old would care around. It's
(30:01):
a little blue thing. It's got a big head. It's
very very skinny, very it's like a pencil. The body's
like a pencil. That's super disappointing. I agree, I agree
what they're they're like. This is the most amazing video
of all time. It was like, what if that is
actually real? Though there's a chance it's it's possible. Who
knows what's out there in the cosmos? Man alive, we
(30:26):
are the superior creatures. Oh man, oh man. They want
to stick probes up our ass to explore. Yeah, all right,
well that is popcles. I realized we were gonna do
Safari Kingdom, but I had to get the popcles, the culture.
We will have Safari Kingdom on the Saturday podcast, Danny, Okay,
I know you're just We will time shift it for
(30:46):
ratings purposes, Yes, for ratings. It has nothing to do
with me screwing up. No, we will. We will time
shift that to the Sunday Podcast Anything or Saturday Podcast
any you want to promote Danny anything at all. As
we put the baby to bed here, well you're done
for the week with your radio shifts. I have one
more to go this afternoon from two to four pm
(31:07):
West Coast Time with Covino and Rich, ending the week
with some fun outstanding enjoy Covino and Rich. The boys
will have a good time Danny of course putting that
all that together, and I will be back tomorrow with
Danny Gee brand new podcast, The most impressive win in
the history of Lost Wages Nevada. Every once in a while,
(31:31):
a long shot pays off. You'll hear a story that
has never been told before. We'll get to that on
the Saturday podcast. Have a wonderful rest of your day
and we'll catch you next time. Later. Skater gott a murder,
Gotta Go.