Joe and Jada - Mike Epps tells WILD Jay-Z & DMX stories, talks Dave Chappelle & top 5 standups - The Herd with Colin Cowherd

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This video I'm talking about you was on welfare. That
never hate on you when I see you in front
of them road wars. That's with the mouthfit. I said,
that can deserve. That's because I've seen that the poor

(00:27):
what happ yartist is.

Speaker 2 (00:28):
Coca that don't Oh, you know what it is, your boy,
Jady kiss, You know what it is that Joe and
Jadas show every show legendary, every show iconic. And we
got our foot on y'all. Next, our next guest self explanatory.

Speaker 1 (00:45):
Biggest in the game, biggest in the game, well known
name in every household.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
You see him on stages, you see him on TVs,
you see him court sign at the games. You might
see him in the suite, the only person that phone
can ring on the couch and we don't the phone call.
You know, I mean, see him in some of your
best films. You ever seen your best stand ups? You
bump into him in the mall. You might see him anywhere.
You're gonna show you that same love. Ladies and gentlemen,

(01:13):
make some noise for our brother Mike.

Speaker 1 (01:19):
Man. I appreciate that man. Two of my favorite guys
in the game. You know what I mean. I gotta
get right to it. Mike, let me tell you some
This product right here is ammonia free. Why fight the
time when you can rewind the time? Hello? Why fight?
Why be fifty three when you can be forty two?

(01:39):
Why be forty two when you can be thirty one?
Available at CBS and salaries and stop the shop. I'm
just trying to put you on to the ship. This
ain't gonna have some bad experiences. It's some guys. My
chin swelled up like a honey bun, my super and
it had a bus coming out of it. And I
went to the emergency man, and I was so mad.

(02:00):
I actually called the top Dog Law because I was
gonna I was gonna sue the hell. You know what,
Don't use the product, brother, don't use the product. We
don't need a guy had profile like Mike gets talking
about top Dog Law. But you know I love that
guy who do them commercial. Yeah, he had an accident.

(02:20):
They chopped your foot off. You thought you was that guy.
Your ship is ended, your wife thought you was flying.
Not no more. When it comes to that time, call
top Dog Law. The god gonna get you out of
you sit, not that guy. He's gonna best commercial. Mike abs, man,

(02:43):
you got the young wife. Man, Yeah, Man, you fucking
My wife wanted me to tell you that. She said, Man,
tell Joe that his family be stylish. You know, you
know how the women ship. You know what I'm saying.
But I see you. I said, damn this guy, Mike,
this man, this guy live a fucking life and you

(03:04):
do whatever the fuck you want. You pull out an
old school, you pull out a new school. Yes, sir, Yes, sir.
You know hey, man, I was just telling a friend
of mine that we all had the pleasure to grow
up at the time that we grew up in because man,
I would I wouldn't trade that for nothing in the world,
because I remember being really really young and the sun

(03:26):
was shining different. It was like when you were young.
It felt like the sun was hotter. Right, Yo, you
had to get me. I had to get in the
house when the ship went dark, me too. And my
mom's a screaming, I like knowing her. And then whistle
beyond everybody knew. They was like, Yo, that nigga coughtstairs.

(03:47):
Cubans caught one whistle. My mom's a caught twenty times.
Joy Joey, my father hit it with that Cuban whistle
niggas is grabbing done. I gotta go.

Speaker 3 (03:58):
He's gonna come down here and smack the s shit
out of you.

Speaker 1 (04:01):
That could go all the way for a while to
for the role. Your mom just called me. My house
is all the way up the block. Somebody tell you
that your mother is calling you. Better get your hands
back down here. Hit you with a Jason No, tell

(04:22):
everybody your real name and ship.

Speaker 3 (04:25):
Listen.

Speaker 1 (04:25):
I used to play with my moms. I used to
be like, yeah, yeah, yeah, come on, keep playing. Were
playing ball boy, that ship goes whistle niggas yo, yo,
goat standing at you. Ever came in the house too
late and the.

Speaker 3 (04:38):
Food was put up, He's like, yeah, where the food.

Speaker 1 (04:43):
Ain't no food on the stove. He said, you missed it, like.

Speaker 4 (04:48):
To sell the house that's so totally clean, White people.

Speaker 1 (04:54):
You missed. Hold me, I'm missed now, don't warm it up.
You better nothing. I want to defrigerated door, noting that ude,
I'm fat, Joe. They never deprived me of a man,
and I was the type. You know. My sisters they
used to pass me ship because they skinny. So if
we had some steak of chick in their back. Give

(05:16):
it to Joey, he eat anything like, give it to Joey,
anything to kill you. Yo, I was fucking everybody's food up.
They knew, Yo, just passed that ship to joe That ship, Addy,
if you could say one boat, what what's the main
store or boat dagger in your neighborhood, that you would
honestly say, fucked you up? Because I know it was

(05:38):
one of them. Well we have we have living in
my neighborhood destroyed me. No, we had Ernie's juice. Now
that you look back at it, God bless Hernie. I'm
sure he's dead. Yeah, yeah, I'm sure that. Listen. I'm

(06:05):
sure he did. I hope you're alive, Arnie. I hope
you're lived. Man watching this and they raise up like
the man was unsanitary, like a motherfucker. He had this
hurt fur and his fucking ears. He didn't groom his
ears right. But that motherfucker made these sausages with the onions,

(06:29):
with the cheese Ernie's. When your mother sent you to Ernie's,
that ship was a delicacy. It was like going to
City Island and some shit. It was like, Yo, we're
gonna because we even got the fifty cent spice. Am.
He's saying, what we got Ernie's Ernie's a buck twenty
five buck fifty. That's where you could buy a whole
grocery with that type of buddy. I don't know how

(06:50):
old you are, but I literally i'm fifty five. Okay,
we're the same name. Man. I used to go a
supermarket with my mother with two dollars and they get
the rice chicken, a pack of cigarettes, and bread and
the milk for two dollars. That's before Christ that nigga
was one. And I don't know how I remember that

(07:12):
you was one when we had royal farms met food.
I love going to the supermarket and the laundry. Man,
you sit there boat clothes with your mama and ship
and tell you someone, my mom's got paid. That moms
got paid, and she was she bring that taxi and
she had them fucking bags in the hand. That ship

(07:35):
was like crap were running out the helping with the bags. Mole,
let me helping. She got the old school donus to
chocolate vanilla with the power, and that ship was what
motherfuck intimates. You run through that ship the glass of
milk and it's so yah and you come out on

(07:58):
the porch with one and one of your friends and say, man,
go in there and give me one of them. And
you know what you're telling man. My mother said, we
can't get nobody, nothing, name, nothing. Yea. My mother said
that I gotta go in the house right there, they're
going there and give me one of them. My ship different.
My father was a dictator. We had like bounty, the

(08:19):
tissue bounty. One of my friends we dropped some ship
and he grabbed a bounty to wipe up. My father
was like, yo, what the fuck he was? He was like,
you know how much the bounty course, nigga, juice this
ship over you nothing bounty. I'm like, oh my, I
think my friend never came back to Ma. He grabbed bounty,

(08:40):
had ship something really really father to use the bounty, Yo, Mike,
my father made rest in peace. I love him, I
love him well. He was different. He was different. He
take you to the store body the fucking plastic coat
instead of the leather. He'll embarrass me at every because

(09:00):
because he didn't understand your your mind frame of what
the following designers was, because he didn't come from that.

Speaker 3 (09:07):
He came from what the fuck you save a dollar?
I don't know what you talk like.

Speaker 1 (09:11):
When I got upset because I couldn't get no Jorge,
my dad was like, that made you upset. I took
and put some pills in the toilet and flushed it
and act like I was overdose and I'm laying on
the ground and they called. They called. My mother was saying,
oh god, he killed his sound he killed hisself. And
they called the real paramedics. They showed up. I'm laying

(09:32):
on the ground, act like I'm there. I'm like, oh,
ship coming now, they're gonna blow the spot. They was
hitting my They knew wasn't nothing wrong with me. They
was hitting my face and my eye was blinking. It
was like okay, okay, so you know what they did.
They took me to They played it all the way
out with me. It took me all over the thing
and shit, I could hear my brother. Oh man. They

(09:54):
took me down there and made me drink some black
charc on. That's like what you take if you over
dose and takes a pill. And I drunk it because
I was black, because I was trying to get some
Jordan's nigga and let me tell you some crazy shit.
My mother bought me them shoes, and my dad was mad.
It worked. Yeah, I worked. I had to drink, I

(10:16):
had to go all the way through that. She said,
I'm gonna go ahead and buy.

Speaker 3 (10:19):
For everybody had the leather bomber.

Speaker 1 (10:24):
The most disgusting part about it is my moms gave
the man the one hundred and fifty dollars, go get
him his jacket. I go in there with him in
June man and he started arguing with the man like
three four hours. Nigga, everybody come up here. Yo. My
pops ain't give a fuck. I don't know how to
explain it to you. He arguing with them over ten dollars, yo,

(10:46):
wun thirty one thirty. They come out the back. They're
like goua special. They came out with the plastic lever Bamba.
He bought that ship for like fifty dollars. He was
like yo. I was like yo, yo, I don't want
the plastic pop. I don't want the nigga. Y'all had
the plastic man. The nigga fucked me up. They didn't
know he was hurting you. He thought you looked good

(11:06):
in that ship. Yo. He came down and gave my
mother the hundred out look fifty dollars. Is that why
you're inter clothes like that? Because they fucked with me? Man,
that hurts you, didn't it? Just trying to say that
hurt and you're beginning to school. I had a green sweatsuit,
red one in the blue one. By the middle of

(11:27):
the year, I had a green shirt, green pants, I
mean blue pants, and read everything.

Speaker 3 (11:33):
That's what killing me. I don't know how to fuck.

Speaker 1 (11:36):
Y'all grew up here because the pressure of being fly
is on and popping to at a young age, right.

Speaker 3 (11:44):
Telling you it was a young age he was fucked up.

Speaker 1 (11:47):
You may you get a pit sneakers? How did you
figure it out? You didn't.

Speaker 4 (11:53):
Figured it out? When you figured it out? When when
you got it? Whatever it was the you know you
go in the sneaker store. You can't go to that
rack over it. It is like a forty to sixty
dollars stay over.

Speaker 1 (12:04):
Still like that angry, like that's who ended up being crasp.
It's still like this's ain't afford it. Some niggas haters,
nigga can't afford it. It's still like that, still like that.
To this day, when you go to Bell Harvard, you
know they got to Jewish stars mean broke nigga kill

(12:24):
your listen, Belle Harven Miami. To this day, I've been
both of them. Hey man, I'm not lying. I've been
so broken before. When I was younger, it was hard
when my friends be bragging on the nigga. I was
one of them.

Speaker 3 (12:36):
Niggas say, shut up, stop talking about.

Speaker 1 (12:40):
That nigga like that.

Speaker 3 (12:42):
The dudes is praising the dude.

Speaker 1 (12:44):
Man. I'm like, that's why we can't fucking get another
They do that ship now because your mother fucking asked,
especially the drug dealer nigga. Oh God that if you
ever see some motherfuckerbody kiss a ass to see the
drug dealer kids ass, that's the king of the kids
ask is somebody and that's the kids asked. That is
not genuine people. Oh Lord, that I watched my brother,

(13:08):
my brother ass kiss you. My brother was kingtin. I
watched him pull up and niggas used to open that
door carry him out listen, picked him up. Me. Nigg
acting like this like they're in the movie he nigga.

(13:31):
Everybody acting like he can't no money man, chill cop.
He sell off. He ain't have a nigga buying a
lollipop or ice pop. I watched the vice versa. I
watched him pull up like the Godfather, like the nigga

(13:54):
used to wear the white suit walking through the nig
When my brother used to come and look like they
was paused sucking them off. So legend when he was
fucked up, they would not look at this snigger like
they was acting like, all right, this this, I've seen
it with my own eye. That's prepared me for the future.

(14:16):
So when I come up and I get to the bag,
they thinking it's like yo the money man all over again.

Speaker 3 (14:21):
Said no, I watch what y'all did to my brother.

Speaker 1 (14:23):
I watched people that my brother bought, the TV, the
furniture that he bought, their whole crib like gave it
to him, like furniture, this, this, that wouldn't let him
in their house when he needed a meal. You know
what they was thinking about. He gave us crack money.
Fuck him. He gave us the money that he got

(14:44):
from adulpe thing. Fuck him. That's how they looked at it.
That's real shit, because that means the whole game is
corrupt and filthy. That's why I was telling the young dudes.
They be so shocked about what happens to him in
the streets. Say, man, you didn't know that that come
with it? I said, Nigga, everything anything you could think of,

(15:07):
motherfucker's good. That's why the street thing really is really old.
With all these cameras, you'd be a damn food they
gonna follow you away from I knew this, didn't I
knew this. Dominican dude, ain't that crazy. Back in the
day you could do something and drive off, you get away.
But now you go, they got the camera watched all
the way up on the highway. That motherfucker follow you

(15:30):
always back, my brother, what's it like for you, Yes, sir,
being a comedian out the country kitchen? First country kitchen,
how's that? I've been watching it on the ground. And
they took me to the White side over there, and
oh yeah, when I seen you at the All Star,
I was I was running so much, man, And but
I should have he didn't take me the country kitchen.

(15:52):
I'd have been there every day, turning up every day,
fire every day. What was what was the go to meal? Everything?

Speaker 3 (16:01):
Yeah, they got everything yeah, fish, Yeah, they got it.

Speaker 1 (16:06):
Corn. Man. You remember Jimmys Bryance's Cafe. I used to
go to Jimmies Bronce Cafe. I used to do comedy
in there. Jimmy Spots Cafe. Yeah, back in them days.
I used to do comedy in the Jimmy's Bronx Cafe.
And I used to do comedy at the Sugar Shack
with Rob Staples. That was on Jerome Avenue. This in

(16:29):
nineteen ninety ninety one. Me and Tracy Morgan used to drive.
I'll be in the car with Tracy. He had a
little a misda and he was riding. We'd be riding
and going and doing them comedy shows and shit. I
used to see y'all, man, But you know how it is, man,
y'all had a bunch of niggas. I said, I ain't
about to walk up to him and say nothing to them.
But I seen y'all at and Soles. You remember that club.

(16:51):
So my brother Mayor used to own their Assoles. Man.
I seen Mike Tyson at Assoles. I seen him out
side the club. And I and I seen you one time.
I seen you in a club. It was like in
co Op City. It was back in the day. It was,
it was, it was. It was a dingy ass little spot,

(17:13):
of course. And the dude, you've been all over New
York man, I used to live in the Bronx. I
used to live on on a beach in Saint Lawrence.
Hold that thought right there, I gotta go use the bathroom.
Dominique Wilkins used to live on the Bronx.

Speaker 3 (17:25):
He did no Dominate Wilkins, never.

Speaker 1 (17:30):
Course did he. He must have had a girl up there.

Speaker 3 (17:37):
If you meet girls in them cities, you're gonna meet.

Speaker 1 (17:39):
Know the city. That's a fact. I just told my
bunny yesterday. I went back in the day. I didn't
even know about the Marshy projects. I went. A girl
invited me over there. I went in the apartment, and
when I came out, it was one hundred niggas downstairs.
And I asked, I said, damn, where the fuck do
the niggas come from. She said, ah, they live here.
I said, I can't walk out there, you know. She said,

(18:00):
fucking bitch ass niggas. And we walked out, and I
swear them niggas was talking ship to all of to
me and her and she there. I swear it's the
first time I ever heard a girl say suck my
dicky bitch ass. I said, what the I've never heard
of sit like a girl? I said, what the heart? Yeah, man,

(18:25):
I I used to love the Bronx. I used to
go to Bronx, b Q Copone, Barbieque, b b Q Capone.
What's the white guy, y'all? A J A J. J. White?
He was? I was a fan of A J. White.
White was funny. A G. White was funny. He didn't
want to say it. What what's Tupac's name spelled? Back?
And I said what he said? Put? I said you

(18:47):
the thirty, I said, nigg. I said, this family gonna
fuck you up? Yo. Man. It was a time where
the comedians can say whatever the fuck they want to say. Actually,
we wanted you to say some wild ship like to
me as comedy. You know comedians, if they censor you

(19:09):
or cancer you, then the world is nah, don't because
your ship is we gotta laugh at ourselves.

Speaker 3 (19:18):
Joe, what's the biggest artist you work with?

Speaker 1 (19:21):
Me? Jay Z? I work with Nads, I work with eminem,
with Jada, kiss with a lot of I work with
you know what I'm saying. Budget bontime. When you go reggae,
you go budget. I worked with so many people. I
was so blessed to j Lo's the I think Jalo
probably the richest person I worked with. J Loo go

(19:44):
one time. This is fat Fat Joe. She got a
show three Fat Josepho and she wants me to do
some start a show with her jingle Balls or some
ship like that, right, and she rant, is it jingle
balls a jingle bell? What's the name of it is?

(20:06):
Jingle Boys? I didn't make the name up anyway. Let
me tell the story. She asked me to come. She
they asked me what was my favorite meal, and I
said burger King, And man, they went it the whole
not first class. She paid every ticket on the plane.

(20:28):
Say it's one hundred something seats. It was just us
first class, fucking burger king on every chair, and we
came over here to do the show. Well, she don't
give Jalo blow the bag, bro. You imagine American airlines.
The ship was empty, just us first class. She paid
for every ticket. It was just rendezvous. She might have

(20:51):
been it. I don't think she been Sue's ronde for me.
One time she been there. I don't think she she
worked there. Well, I'm just saying you think she been
in there one time? Yeah, at least once, But you
she could have been in the wedge, you know, the wadge.
That ship was bullets off hedge like the rolexes that
like Man City. The city was a little better it was.

(21:13):
The wedge was like I remember, I never forget I
took a scar face in that motherfucker. He was looking
like yo, these bitch like every bitch got a buck
fifty yard bullet scarf. That ship, the weg, the wedge,
that ship that Hunts Point one way in one way
out Hunters Point, Like I wouldn't go nowhere to fuck
near it right now? Did you see that pimp movie

(21:35):
that Brent Awens did about Hunter's Point. You ain't never
seen that back in the day, like the pimp stuff
hole that yeah, yeah, yeah, brent Onwans and the head
had really was like that. And I see this area
right here when you see these skyscrapers and all this
ship it's called Hudson Yards. It's way all the holes

(21:56):
and pimps was like real PENSI if you came through
here and the downside down south everywhere they came out here.
I've seen some ship out here one time. Yeah, this
was crazy. This was very act. This was the pimp.
This was the show. This was Hunt's point, was the
dirty aid man. This was it right here. Motherfuckers in

(22:17):
cadillacs and pimps and Rose Royces or type of ship.

Speaker 3 (22:21):
They was getting a lot of money back in the day.

Speaker 1 (22:24):
Yeah. See, that's the thing about that about pimping man,
is that you didn't think about New York, you know
what I mean, You wouldn't know that unless this had
a lot of pimps. When I used to go out
and there, Minnesota had a lot of pimps.

Speaker 3 (22:39):
Yeah, that's at Midwest. They on the lake Minnetonka Lake.

Speaker 1 (22:44):
On the lake. Who was at the Minnetaka Lake on
Prince and all that's that f and they got on
the boat. Yeah. You see a boat out there, and
you see the girls on the boat. You see the
the pimp his hair with the pirate the girls you
see here and float. That's one thing funny thing man

(23:09):
like Vegas, if you if you go to like a
diner at four point thirty in the morning, you'll see
all the pimps, they and him and them and the
girls will be done and they be all eating and
he'd be sitting there talking to him.

Speaker 3 (23:20):
Yeah, and catch up right there. And I told you
get back down there because I gotta.

Speaker 1 (23:25):
Yeah, put this out right there and all the girls
be eating it. Yeah, he said, I said what I'm
saying that San Francisco. You going that diner and it
be nothing with the girls girls last year. Yeah, yeah,
motherfuckers with dead that's fillmore and Hunters that's they got
a hundreds point too in San Francisco, Hunters point in

(23:46):
phild yep in San Francisco, and a Hunters point here.
That's crazy. Yeah, it's crazy. Man. Man, the pimp game.
I don't miss those days. I't me.

Speaker 3 (23:56):
That's kind of that's one of us.

Speaker 1 (23:57):
Suit. I was like, my sparing, somebody need to be
with you, like the girl scared of the Leadric is tough.
The girls is tough though, because they they that's the
hell of a job. It is horrible. It's slimy, that's all.
It's a slimmy job. It's just I never got it,
and then I used to try to get it. When

(24:18):
I thought about it, I said, man, this these niggas
going to hell, like yeah, thinking about what they was
doing to them girls. Yeah, because really the heir, because
it's really and that's I think why they give them
so much time is because the manipulation part of it,
it's like brainwall, like how they did hell brainwashing. What's
his name, Charles Manson, Hurt? What the Yeah, it's kind

(24:41):
of what they gave him the time. Yeah, because if
they think you got that much control over somebody mind
you could call, you can make somebody do anything. So
that's dangerous. Mother you like it. You like the killer
really if you're making somebody out of a more control.
So I think that's what that is, you know what
I mean? Yeah, that's crazy. And the regards to comedy,

(25:04):
did you ever have an arch nemesis or what's one
show you pulled up to that other people was on
the card that you was like, yo, I gotta kill
this shit? Oh man, all the motherfuckers. I never really
had friends in comedy. I can't honestly say that, you
know what I mean. The art form itself is not

(25:27):
like rap music or any other thing. It's a one
man band. You you you everything? Yeah, you're everything. You
don't That's why it's like so dark it makes you
really really cocky, and it's kind of hard. You kind
of gotta be like in Eddie Murphy in his position
to be like, hey it's up man, you know, but

(25:48):
coming up in it that shits cutthroat, for sure. It is,
it really is. That shit is damn there worse than
the rap game. I'm serious. The ship that didn't happened,
the ship outn't heard the ship. I ain't even got
to say their names. Them niggas is off the chain.
I didn't been off the chain. So I know what
it is. It's dark. It's a dark art form. It

(26:09):
don't brighten up until it starts paying you. And you
can get therapy with it. You can, you can buy
your peace a little bit here, because I see a
lot of the comedians commit suicide or type as the lives.

Speaker 3 (26:25):
These are the guys that ma cous laugh like what's
my man?

Speaker 1 (26:28):
Mark? And mindy y'all?

Speaker 3 (26:30):
Ye Robin William he was hilarious, bro.

Speaker 1 (26:33):
Yeah. And you know, just every time I studied the comedians,
they always have like you know, dark lives lives. Well,
you guys get shot, Oh no, we get murdered at
our prom At least we get murdered in how motherfuckers
get murdered as I guarantee both of you motherfucker's got
some damned life experiences fucking with this ship. Y'all was in.

(26:56):
Y'all didn't y'all didn't say tell you what happened to
me one time? So I'll tell you why. I'm telling
you straight up. Pull up. It's a club in my man, ain't.
I got the ugly ones with me, like the real
ugly ones. They're all in jail, Favron. Right, Yeah, we
pull up Fat Joe Show. It's like a thousand people there.

(27:16):
Shit is ram packed. Right when you show up, they
give you your second half of whatever the deposit is.
We ain't even talk about big money, right, So he said, Yo,
the man downstairs. So I go downstairs. How much you
think you're getting? About thousand, seven thousand or something? So
they have to give me thirty five hundred. Yeah right,
So I go downstairs. Italian dude sitting there. He mad

(27:40):
as hell, like, Yo, my man, we need our second half.
He's just ignoring us. Face me and my man flex
He's like yo, he got an attitude. I was like, yo, bro,
you know it's a thousand people upstairs to see fat Jo.
The shits ran packed with my money. So Flex start
talking to him. You know, Flex, rest in peace was

(28:01):
like live, but you start talking about crazy. This nigga
pulled out the biggest gun and we in the bag.
The whole club is partying up there, broll. We turned around.
He's busting at us. We running and I got the
ugly ones outside, but they got no clue that this

(28:23):
is happening. I got the ugly ones. I got horrible
guys with me outside. But this ship is going. We
run upstairs, we go outside. Then his people close the
gate like a happy land with people in there, a
thousand people. They knew the routine. If we shoot at
you closed the gates, even with the people in there.

(28:43):
So we outside, like come outside this and that man,
let me tell you something. The next day is something
my man Big Fred, God bless him. He used to
work security there. He came with the thirty five hundred
and was like, yo, they had shut down the club.
That was gonna be the last day. You know. The
police came and said, yo, you gotta shut down this club.
So that was one the time was tight. I don't know,

(29:06):
he was tight over that they had nothing to do.
But he shot at us and we ran the fuck
up out of there. That ship we got didn't even
know who he was.

Speaker 3 (29:15):
He ain't give a fuck who I was.

Speaker 1 (29:16):
He lost his lick, he lost the ball, the club.
He ain't give a fuck, and we was talking extra spicy.
Fuck you, well, yo, smack the ship out of you.
You don't give me my hat? This is that pull
that ship out of sparking. Wasn't it going? Yea through that?

(29:38):
Always we running through that little hallway. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (29:44):
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Speaker 3 (31:26):
We the Ones Comedy Tour.

Speaker 1 (31:27):
Tell us about that We the Ones Comedy Tour as
a tour, that this is our third year and man,
we didn't have some of the best young high comedians,
from DC Young Fly to Carlos Miller, Mojo Brooks. Last
year we had Little Duval Country Wayne. We switch it
up every year. Man. This year we got those got Mojo, Brush, Colls, Miller,

(31:50):
DC Young Fly, Me, Jay Ski. I'm headlining this year.
I usually host it, but this time I'm going up last,
and I'm gonna beat O Gillnuse.

Speaker 3 (31:59):
I hate that.

Speaker 1 (32:00):
I hate when you when you're like you know, Martin
caught me a couple of times. Yeah, he do the
time ship and he'll come out and be like thank you,
like I'm waiting. I do that. No, I don't do that.
You ever got jerked in one of those I'm coming.
There's a bunch of dudes. I don't know. I'm doing everything. Yeah,
He's you see him all night, fucking it up. Yeah.
And I can go up behind all of them and

(32:21):
still do thirty minutes. I got that in me, you
know what, I'm one of them comeds for a fact.
In the In the comedy, there's definitely gotta be people
who they gotta be biers. That is, back in the
days they used to have guys to hear your moms
and then they go put it on wax before you.
It's fucking hits like with y'all. You ever heard somebody
talk of that ship and you was like, Yo, what

(32:43):
the fuck that's my joke?

Speaker 3 (32:45):
Yeah, the whole fucking business. Oh ship, Mike shit.

Speaker 1 (32:49):
Ll let me tell you some crazy shit. This is
how you know that you when you really own, when
a big motherfucker steals something from you, and you like damn,
and you saying to yourself, you know what you say
when you see a big motherfucker that stole up for
you said he had to hear from a small motherfucker
that stole it from me. You know what I mean.

(33:10):
He didn't get it direct from me. No, a small
motherfucker stole it from me and got around him and
he from he ran with the way. Hell, you know
that motherfucker a thief. Get he gone? You may, my motherfucker,
take your bicycle. You might not never see it again.
You might see the frame on your Yeah, man, of
my funks they got, Nigga, that bike is dissected and gone.

(33:36):
You know what's crazy. I stole the truck once. Right now,
I'm gonna keep it real truck like I had the
same truck. But this guy had the fucking the wide
body kid that yo, God bless you. Man. I gave
back so much. God covered me for that. In the Comma, well,

(33:56):
I stole the truck. Was we went to a nice neighborhood.
They had the fancy hood, Dad of me. We took
that figure. Nah, we stole that ship. We took the ship.
We took it to the shop. They put the hood.
That ship was stated jot Cho too chopped. It was
ship was the Flys truck in the south Brook sound system,
this and that.

Speaker 3 (34:16):
About six months later, they stole that ship from me. Man,
they found nothing. That's right, motherfucker took every that carma
come right back.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
They stole that. That's what made me a thief. I
got everything that ever happened to me. I was not
that yet until it happened to me. I did not
fucking get in the streets until the streets happened to me.
They stole my bike and I said, hell no, I'm
stealing bikes. They jumped me. I said, hell no, I'm

(34:45):
jumping niggas. Fucker snuffed me. I said, no, I'm snuffing niggas.
They robbed me. I'm robbing niggas. I'm not lying. It
make you, It make you do that. That's why they
say Jels a terrible place because you going in for
one thing. When you come back and learn that your
niggas done taught you how to steal everything moving, that's right,

(35:05):
you run into real career criminals. That's what I always said.
I said, I said, you know, when you're young and
you go in one of them badass little kids house
and you see pictures of him when he's young on
his man on, he's like, oh, fuck him here, you
know that. But then it was kids that smell like
p that you know didn't have parents. They'll kill your ass.

(35:30):
That's the motherfucker that he's jealous of you. Why y'all together,
y'all supposed to be shooting at another. Motherfucker. He's one
that shoots you in the back. I've seen ship like
you're telling the truth, not in person, not not your kiss,
not in person. I seen that smell like Pete that
you do. Shit, he killing you, nigga in a robbery.
You got the gun out, he behind you, he shoots

(35:53):
you in the back. Look, I used to be he
already wanted friend, and I have my mother involved, but
his relation ship with him and his dad. I used
to be so jealous. So that's how I was too.
I'd be like, damn, that wasn't even around father. Don't
hug me like that. The nigga, don't show me love
like that. I was just getting jealous of you. Just now,

(36:14):
when you said we're talking about your dad, I was saying, well,
he shut the fuck up. But I didn't say you
saying I acted like I saying I was blessed with him,
even getting the cheap coat. What man. My dad used
to pick me and my brother up and God blessed it,
so I love him still. My dad used to go
pick me and my brother up and act like he

(36:35):
was gonna take us for the weekend and drop us
over another lady house. And my mother said, how was it.
I was like, we was over a busin named pat
House all week She was like Pat. I was like, yep,
we was over Pad house. This nigga was out with
another lady. I don't know what the fuck he was doing,
but what I love about him is that he did

(36:57):
make sure he knew who I who he was, So
that part of me I'm glad. I'm not a grown
man trying to find out where and who my father was.
That's a whole nother level of a game that I
got friends like that.

Speaker 3 (37:13):
Yeah, they act like I'm they daddy sometime, and niggas
your sons act like you there. Well, there's the ones
that don't have a daddy.

Speaker 1 (37:22):
If you know, and I'm in a position, niggas start
acting they I ain't fucking with you. I tell the nigga,
I ain't your daddy, nigga, and then niggas get mad.
I'm gonna kill your nigga, you said somebody. But I'm
just telling you the nucleus of the mental health part
of people. You know what I'm saying, that's some real shit.
Somebody that don't know their father, You're dealing with a

(37:44):
whole another type of person. You know, it's hard beating
that a lot of them are strong, the strongest people
you ever want to meet, or people who are missing something.
You know what I'm saying, That is the strongest person
there's all the strong those are the neighbor go through
the most at verse. Yeah. Yeah, they're the leaders. Like

(38:04):
my wife, God bless her, Sir. Her Dia passed when
she was young she didn't know who he was. But
my wife is so powerful and resilient, and she I'm
the bitch when it comes to her. I'll be sitting
there crying about some ship and she say, oh, man,
that's right. I ain't never seen a woman that stronger
than a man like that. Now and then somebody get

(38:26):
it flat out of man. Every now and then somebody
get the fly huh. Y'all listen, I ain't the only
one to get the flat yeah, nigga, because I have
seen some pictures with you and your wife, and you
looked at the humble to the motherfucker look like I was.
Y'all had pink on and everything said, she made him

(38:47):
put the pink on, the pink rose roys and everything
flyers in the head, I said, she didne melt at
that biet piece and harmony. All we want is anything
that I'll do anything for that, U I all. I
wanted to seek the kid no beef. Well, I got
a TV show coming with Keny you bears me and
him wrote a mule boo.

Speaker 3 (39:08):
I got a TV show with ken you too.

Speaker 1 (39:10):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you kid, Jimmy's Bronx Cafe Baby. Yeah.
The Upshaws is coming out the last season of the
shows Me and Wanda Sykes on Netflix only on Netflix,
y'all come out, Uh January twentieth. I got another movie
coming out with Kevin Hart seventy five some shit Me

(39:31):
and this niggas. I don't know the name of the motherfucker.
It was a big buddet Why big budget wide movie,
you know what I mean? I got a little piece
of money out of it. Fucking you know, but uh.

Speaker 3 (39:42):
You stay working, you stay blessed because you see him.

Speaker 1 (39:45):
The almost comedians are like America, you even richer, you
dirt poor. I don't believe that. I see something. It
ain't no middle class, nigg No, it ain't. There ain't
no middle class. It's ef you richer, you poor for
sleeping in your car because it's a lot of comedians.
Because it's a lot of comedians, and all of our

(40:06):
stories are like that. That's what I'm saying. Man. I
moved to New York in nineteen ninety one and didn't
know nobody from Indiana and what you thought, like you
was gonna blow up here, Like that's what the deal was.
I came here and lived for ten years, rode the
trains everywhere. You know. One thing I did, I said,

(40:27):
I gotta start wearing with the niggas wear. So I
went to Boston tembulance. I started learning the clock because
because the ship I had when I got here from Indiana,
when I was dating girls, they was like, you gotta
take that ship off. You know, New York girls. They
liked me, but they were just laughing in my accident.
They like, I take that ship.

Speaker 3 (40:44):
I had a long leather trench coat with like a
peak cootch.

Speaker 1 (40:48):
Yeah. They motherfucker had a three quarter left with a stroud.
My wife and my girl said. The girl I was
with you said you gotta take that ship off, you know.
I mean, yeah, I had. I had some friends man
all over in the Bronx. Man. I didn't been on
the train. I didn't been on the sixth train with
a girl riding going to do shows. And that was

(41:09):
the crazy thing about my journey is that I was
here for ten years. I've been around everybody and everything,
and I was a ghost. Nobody even seen me. And
I said to myself, if I was a hitman, I
could have killed the whole hip hop business. You could.

Speaker 3 (41:25):
Because I was at the Shark bar.

Speaker 1 (41:27):
I been in Puffy's restaurant. I didn't been standing right
next to jay Z at the Latin Quarters. He was
about to go on the stage. Nigga had a had
a polo shirt on and a little hat. I swear
to God, I'm not lying to you. And I was
a ghost. I was sitting there. I watched everything, but
I did a lot of comedy shows. I used to
do shows with talent man. I used to host the

(41:50):
Peppermint Lounge. It was a club in Jersey, off the chain.
Motherfucker be dead in front of it. They still got
the show going tretch naughty by nature and them coming
there every night, off the chain. But I'll be telling
this story to tell kids that especially kids that are
not from big cities, because, believe it or not, these

(42:12):
small towns and small cities, some of the realist motherfuckers
you ever met in your life come from them towns.
I'm talking about stopped down Cohort. The only way you
could really find out street niggas is to go to
the FEDS and a nigga from a stinky hall. Cut

(42:33):
your head off, bro, what I'm saying, so you have
to understand this real motherfuckers all over the world, and
I came to this city, man, and I didn't have nothing.
I got on Death Comedy Gym, the first thing I
ever did that. I got on here. I was an
extra on New York Undercover. It had Malik Yobo and
the little Spanish dude. I'm sitting there looking at Elik

(42:55):
talking shit and he laughing at me, like because I
had an accent. He said, Man, where you from? I said, Indiana?
And oh, man, tell you I got some cold stories.
I was dating a girl that was in the Marshy Projects.
This before I even knew anything about jay Z. Her
name was Peanut, and I'm I'm dating her and I
go up She invites me to the hell y'all invite

(43:16):
me to the project. I go to the projects and
I go upstairs. This the first time I smell phizy elevator.
I'm talking about. Damn. I'm in New York. I'm from Indiana. Men.
I come downstairs. When I walk out, I mean, before
I walk out, I see a hundred niggas thing. I'm like,
where the fuck did they come fast? They on both
sides of the door, and she like, oh fuck, damn,
come on I'm like, oh no, ain't, No fucking nigga, ain't.

Speaker 3 (43:38):
But it ain't nowhere to go through.

Speaker 1 (43:42):
Sit around now, like come and take the girl to
their crib and it's in the projects. It's ten niggas
in that, yo, Nigga. Well, I tell you so, them
niggas was talking ship. They must have knew her. They
grew up with it because they grew up. I told
him that was the first time I ever taught her,
the girl telling him, suck my thick bitch ass. Nigga.
I said, what the fuck? I ain't never because I

(44:03):
ain't never heard no girl telling nigga that I didn't
know you had a ship flake went out here. That
blew my mind. That was a wild ship to me,
you know what I'm saying. I said, Oh Lord, I'm
glad they knew her, because if they didn't know her,
they were saying her real name. They were saying, oh
thank god she wasn't saying because we used to add

(44:24):
girls in my bus was a see, I wouldn't have
came home. No, the shotgun come out boom, Yo. You
got to run your jewels, you got to run it.
But that was all drug dealer ship that's how that
ship went. Yeah, comedy Monk Rushmore, Come on, Richard Prior,
Eddie Murphy or Martin Lawrence, Bernie Matt and Robin Harris.

(44:45):
Can't nobody beat the five Who gonna beat that fie?
Who gonna beat that five man?

Speaker 3 (44:53):
Nobody beating that Richard prop You know what?

Speaker 1 (44:56):
Hold up, yo, niggas. There is an exception. I didn't
hear Dave Chappelle well sopel. Dave Chappelle is he's younger
than me, don't matter. He ain't up there with them.
To me, that's my opinion. Now I have to put

(45:16):
him in a category that's right after them. You can't. Yeah,
you can't tell the kids that me and him looking
up at the same person. See what I'm saying. I
get it. I'm the same way say if it was
hip hop with Jail car Ras shit like that, we
ain't gonna mention like anger like you will get mad
if a nigga tried to say you and like wanted
you to look up to Tim Dogg, let me change something.

(45:40):
If a nigga try to get you to look up
to tell let me tell your story. Though, that's crazy
that he said that. Hold on dog Man. How about
can I say something? Can I fucking say something? How about?
None of us in the Bronx know nothing about Tim Dogg.
Tim dog was the first six'. Nine the nigga had

(46:00):
real niggas behind him from the. Nine but we never
knew where the Fuck Tim dogg was. From he he
fucked comp And i'm from The. Bronx i'm from.

Speaker 3 (46:09):
That we don't know Where Tim dogg.

Speaker 1 (46:11):
Is he wasn't from the Bron he can't go to
a building and say this Is Tim. Doggs nobody knew
where he was from many years. LATER i don't give
a fuck What i'm trying to tell. You is it
That i'm trying to think about? This some brave. Shit
he had dudes behind him that were the real. Deal
what else in the? NINTIES i dare you try to

(46:33):
call the boss to tell, us, nigga Where's Tim doggs? From?
Everybody and he was saying he was from The, bronx
but he had The he had The West coast niggas
mad at The. Bronx he also Had listen that might
have Started east Coast West coast. Beat let me say
what was the first. One it's the first Blow i'm
trying to tell you when six' nine was talking. That,
Ship yeah i'm asking, my man who's the guys standing?

(46:58):
Behind him and, They're, like yo.

Speaker 3 (46:59):
That's such, and such.

Speaker 1 (47:00):
That's such he's the. Real deal made me think six'
nine Was real because i'm looking at the video he's talking.
All that ship everybody behind him is. The Real deal
tim dogg was the. First six nine he was out.
There Fuck camp Then I'm from new. York this day
everybody behind him. WAS the Realism I, knew Tim dogg
but i'm just trying. TO tell you i try to.

(47:22):
Do THE math after I Thought about TIM dogg and, I,
was Say Yo where? Tim Dogg from and i'm asking
every Nigg, in the bronx and nobody could point to
the building all the hood like. Like they knew everybody
standing behind HIM That, was i god. Rest in peace
that was all. The nine guys they was.

Speaker 3 (47:39):
The real, Deal with him tim do because the boy
just step.

Speaker 1 (47:43):
For. Some, Ship yo yeah, i'm, telling you yo google
Up To. Google tim dogg where's? He at now i'm telling.
You The truth castle ill. Not just KID he forgot

(48:03):
i SEEN. HIM at V i M. Tim Dog, god oh.

Speaker 3 (48:09):
God Bless Him, Dog, white castle man niggas.

Speaker 1 (48:15):
Dog white CASTLES. On the fdr Remember. That White castle
white castle. IS still popping i actually Eat. THAT white
castle i used to Shop. AT that modell's i used
to Live. In the bronx, i'm, telling, YOU yeah yeah
i know he talking about. My, SOUND view man I used,
TO i swear i used To Go on fordham, road
and shop and my buddies got.

Speaker 3 (48:36):
Out of prison they. USED to come i used to.
FLY hi there i watched the fucking Dude Up on
fordham road Ups.

Speaker 1 (48:41):
There on, instagram, you heard yeah kiss they beat the,
brakes off this. But he deserved he was like a homeless,
dude but naked and some dude got it into him and.
He was fighting he was about. THE fuck nigga i,
SWEAR to god i don't. Want. That ship yo, listen,
you okay okay cause this penis is gonna touch your,

(49:05):
tell you, Yo hold on i'm. Gonna tell you you're gonna.
Hear some meat you're gonna hear something. Doing like this
you're gonna hear something like something is GONNA do like.
I say this that's. My fucking point this, ship, Is,
Flagrant man yo this Cit. Is, Fil yo listen i'm trying, to.
Tell you, YO all right i want everybody all here to. Google, this, Ship,

(49:30):
listen guy yo let me. Tell the Story don't may
yo run off the? Road, every Time okay now joe now?
Can we now can we. CLEAR the floor i don't make.
THIS ship up i don't make. THIS ship up i
just tell it. Like it is it's a big homeless

(49:53):
motherfucker ass naked, off, for them. Rod, he, Argued, listen
listen mike he arguing. With the dude the dude try.
To fight him the dude try. To fight him. He's
butt naked this guy starts fucking, the dude, up, the
nigga nigga, the whole neighborhood, even the pause the frank,

(50:14):
for the, man the ladies everybody beat, this nigga's ass the,
butt naked dude the whole. For them road jumped them fifty,
niggas like yo the fuck. Out Of, here LIKE yo
when i say the ladies walked by and, was like
boom like he was fire nigga about six seven foot.

(50:35):
Talk probably yo he butt naked in the. Middle of
daytime it looked, Like, The, Morning, yo yo mike here
about to beat the shit out of the kid who
it's one guy who had the courage, to, be like,
yo my man what the? Fuck you doing he start.
Beating them up you Ain't know, what i'm saying deal.

(50:57):
WITH a, Nigga i mean jesse even want to go
next to a. Naked, homeless, Person no no but he
told the. Thing about police no hard for them because
they got, a. Oh yeah yeah they. Gottack NAKED niggas
and i think they. DO that often i think they do.
That often too that's not A far. Fetcher i'm saying i've.
Seen the video y'all. Could google it the little guy

(51:20):
try to tell, them that man you was woman out here.
LIKE fuck you i don't know. WHAT it was i couldn't,
hear the value but they scrapped and the button naked
nigga was getting the best him in. The middle man
they beat the brakes. Off this month they hit this
nigga with the frank. For the truck everybody got in.
On this, ship you know. In the neighborhood they Don't
want to they tight. At this ship the nicest guy

(51:45):
in the, world walk by. Start that nigga they all gave.
It to him like everybody whole neighborhood or y'all gonna be.

Speaker 3 (51:50):
IN the music i know y'all gonna be In The
hip hop Museum, they got.

Speaker 1 (51:54):
Yeah FUCK with the i fuck With The. Hip hop
Museum SHOUT. Out, rubin ds no it's gonna send The.
Problem righting Bronx sit the bronx about one hundred and
forty nine yo. Said they do the man they're, saying
they do It's. In, the bronx man shout. Out the
rock he Shout OUT. The ruben ds we just that's
where they gave. Me the award it's going to Be

(52:15):
in the bronx when hip hop Started, and, The locks man,
i'm telling you let me tell you something.

Speaker 3 (52:20):
ABOUT the LOCKS i thought. I was fried my.

Speaker 1 (52:24):
Guess he fried the locks got because y'all Got fans
in cincinnati and. Ship like that y'all touched A lot Of,
midwest with joe got A. Lot of florida they Love,
you On, florida The. Trumpish huh florida They Fuck. With

(52:44):
joe crack but you. Know it's people it's the older People.
Down in florida they don't even. Know you wrapped they
just know you ez to. Who you are and if
you say you ever Heard of, FEED joe songs i
didn't know. HE made, music, i said yeah That's where
he and then, after the, music you Say You know fat?
JOE was drug.

Speaker 3 (53:03):
I had not they and they see them pictures when
you had the.

Speaker 1 (53:06):
Big black coat you know your. DApp, da, ship no
no this was an.

Speaker 3 (53:11):
Army said card you didn't. Have no money you was
poor as a motherfucker.

Speaker 1 (53:17):
IN this video i. Seen this video i'm talking about you.
Was on welfare never. Hate ON you when i see
you in front of them rod war since with, THE
mouth fits i said that nigga deserve THAT ship because
i seen. That nigga poor you see me with the hero.
And bone chain not you. Didn't have nothing you had

(53:39):
a black the black army jockey. And some boots you are.
Dusty as HELL so when i, See you, Clean, i'm
like oh that nigga. Deserved that ship, try, to say hey,
niggats too dusty, Nigga them first, love. Them first motherfucker
Oh that young jadakin was. Going to prison THAT'S why

(54:02):
when I see When i see, JADAKIN'S real, father i
said ain't no.

Speaker 3 (54:06):
Wear in hell that nice ass man had that dust
ass little.

Speaker 1 (54:09):
BOY like, that i said he didn't do nothing that
man told. Him to do. YOU could, tell i said
HOW the hell I said that nigga's father look like
a principal. In high school how the hell you have a,
dusty ass criminal criminal, son like that that boy to

(54:32):
do nothing that man told. Him to, do, Fac yo man, but,
thank god man we made It through the we slipped, through,
The cracks man and that's what we. Be, TRYING to
like i tell. YOU the truth i get up EVERY
day and i. CAN'T believe it I. Swear to god i'm, telling,
You all guys. God. Is, REAL up no i CAN'T

(54:52):
believe that i. Own THE house like I can't believe
i literally. Own the heights. I'M just saying i can't believe, on,
the metra. Y'all, let's fit yeah. THIS guy's crazy I
can't believe i. OWN the house I can't believe i.
GOT a car. I can't, believe you know ship was
FUCKED up when. I grew up this ship is, the

(55:14):
simple things. The littlest thing get mad a. Little bit
sometime when you see you can't, GET mad, something i
mean you. Don't get MAD but sometime i get a
little frustrated with MY kids because I wish sometime, I
wish they i wish they they could. Live a week
they go back and, do A week, and, i said
man this one week they had come back and be

(55:36):
humble AS of, motherf, i.

Speaker 3 (55:38):
Know man you know what the PROBLEM is they i
can't even explain, it.

Speaker 1 (55:42):
To him YOU know, what i mean. Never, GONNA wait
yeah i can't explain. It to him I'M happy that
i could do, it For him. And i'm mad so We.
Ain't toast jada we. Ain't toast yet this to the.
Tour comedy tour yeah to, he, the ones y'all. We
the ones talk, your, tickets available. Wealth knowledge yourself make
sure you get tickets to. The comedy tour, miss three

(56:04):
years third year is more? More to come you.

Speaker 3 (56:07):
Might Let me explain.

Speaker 1 (56:08):
Sinny.

Speaker 3 (56:08):
This podcast yeah Then there's The.

Speaker 1 (56:11):
Joe with jada y'all doing. A, great job man how
many episodes y'all got? Like fifty something? Now are, you
oh no we we hide your, planing Right, Now ship
mike so Y'ALL can. KNOW i Did I did nori,
yega's First One. THE drink champs i did the first.
FUCKING drink champ i was the first one on there

(56:31):
and look. At his. Ass that motherfucker, i'm telling you
this is the best thing that could ever. Happen to
us and it's good that y'all doing it now because
it's cury to. Burn that niggas if, you ain't in
it's over with because you know what, you're. Telling them
right and it's hard to get a good combination because,
they've been saying they were saying they getting the bag.

(56:52):
And ALL that now i see everybody's mother and cousin.
WITH the, Podcast, I said YO i. HOPE i don't.
I don't work. We missed it it ain't. It ain't work,
the wire. Nigga, don't trade no it. Don't it don't.
It ain't working, It ain't working and went on everybody
coming up to your. CONGRATULATIONS on yours. I got, mine i'm, like,
that's Right brother because i've never, been a hater, like,

(57:14):
al right brother no. PROBLEM this gods i know they
don't even. Talk to, words, THEY'RE like yo i got. My,
own podcast yo it's good. Luck Like ad, but, i'm
like yo did we miss the golden? The, golden age
no the combination gotta work and and and. Another Thing
too you you you gotta. Always remember you you came

(57:35):
in the, door already made. You already made that's the
ship you. Say To you, what i'm saying it's hard
to make yourself and. Then make Yourself you gotta i'm gotta.
Make myself now that's that's Like a stephen a or
something that's like one out. Of a million somebody that really.
Didn't know that just. Make their personality just try TO do,
when i, knew YOU know when i knew. We, was

(57:57):
big yeah We Had stephen a smith days of going
ahead and he shouted on me on. My own show
you know what? That TOLD me, when i went who?
Was on? GOING to, myself i said we gotta. Be
on fight he made it his business to come on
here and. Ship on me he see us like the,
train is coming hen. The train is. I'm telling you

(58:18):
when somebody that big turn, around to, Snipe You say
mike absence coming up in the game and he got
a little baby kids, to dis, someone, he, SAID oh
ship i must be they They feeling the you gotta
look at that because they ain't gonna pick on you if. You,
ain't popping, yeah he, said hold up about. The LIFE
too if, i, TOLD him yo i want to be,

(58:41):
the next, commentator, he said, nah nah nah that ship.
Ain't gonna, Work, he like yo don't come in. This
space here he. SAID that ship i, agree with him, cause,
he said Man you, Tell, he said joe. You tell,
him he said you tell. So much stories nobody can
tell you what. You. Can't, do, Man, yeah yeah stephen they,
was UP here but i saw what. It was us we.

(59:01):
Fucking everybody up everybody. Dizzy right now they can't believe
the ship that. Is going on mike got him sit
me and say your? Jarm IN town can? I pull.
Up i did it's got to. SELL our.

Speaker 3 (59:14):
STADIUM i. Did i did but he know who the.

Speaker 1 (59:16):
Hottest, NIGGAS like yeah i always we got the smoking
always fuck with data and the ship is. In our
hands it wasn't. When you shoot you know, when you
shoot and you got the firepower that this. One ship
y'all and he finished that whole thing glass. Is in
TROUBLE now can i? Talk my? Ship? Your? SHIP ship,

(59:47):
BOPS i said i seen him and They. Was milli
vanillian i've Seen them On They. Was milli vanilly you
don't know. What is youth they was taking the fun
and these guys was out here talking big ship.

Speaker 3 (01:00:05):
And they was criticizing motherfuckers and they never did shit
and hip hop.

Speaker 1 (01:00:09):
In THEIR life and.

Speaker 3 (01:00:11):
I know never. Sold, the record huh never.

Speaker 1 (01:00:14):
SOLD the record i know that Day They saw Hey,
joe and jada they knew they. Ship was, over OH
yeah they i don't give, a fuck who how, big
you is whatever the, case may is, the niggas. Do
it's over why we? Got top? Five did Alive We?
Got fat joe he Don't Give, a fat joe don't.
Give a fuck i'm gonna tell you the most powerful

(01:00:44):
thing y'all. GOT going on I just told jayda outside
is y'all totally different and he's he's got a. Whole
different story he come from a similar, but not close
but a different.

Speaker 3 (01:00:56):
Area than you you come from, a different, area and man.

Speaker 1 (01:00:59):
Y'all is, different if y'all if they would have had
another guy that that was, similar to you or another guy,
saying that ship. Wuldn't the word and that's really what
is paired up in. The podcast thing it's like you
can't really put the same people. Around each, OTHER let's
Say i Thank, god for jada you gotta. Have peanut butter,
Jelly brings me he brings me. Back to life Peanut

(01:01:20):
butter and. Jake got it YOU know? What I mean
if i had imagine my co, host, was ya yo
we have wrapped beef with the guys who wait even
hit when we go, to have it we already know.
We got beef or just like he just he slowed
me up and be like your. Cribs CHILL crack imagine

(01:01:40):
I had a tony yayoor live while. We got beef
we can't. Even, come outside yeah some of these guys
can't come? Outside right right. That's another thing some, of these,
guys y'all, kids come on can't you? Know, it's true
well what if you did a lot of? These guys
interview what if it was? You and granddaddy are you

(01:02:01):
it's something New? From the randaddy you nothing? About real? Hipop? Right?
THERE hey good i, knew the, words guess yo KISS
at least i, knew the? Words RIGHT hey can i
ask you some hipop real? Hip hop questions, we hear
That We hear kse solo was The. FIRST red man

(01:02:25):
i don't know if he's the, first red Man but
kse solo really really. REALLY dope spell i don't know.
What it was your mama brother here, In. MY business
jamma i thought. They was. BROTHERS me too i thought They,
was Spell, bunce Spell, BROWN, spell Bounce. Dmx dm max

(01:02:47):
they're at. Beasts in JAIL that's why i want to. Get.
At me, dog you say TELL That nigga k solo.
That's all over that's some, ship right.

Speaker 4 (01:02:57):
There spell boun when they was in they was in
the Mining Block in long island.

Speaker 1 (01:03:01):
Somewhere and locked up together and THEY they said dmx
did It and they. Solo got on. It's spelled down
YOU know who i thought WAS related TO dmx because
i was around him one time and the nigga's energy was.

Speaker 3 (01:03:15):
Just like HIM. Father m c you? Remember father them you?

Speaker 1 (01:03:18):
Think father them, she, Was like no I'm saying that
i've seen him and. He was. Wild he was he.
WAS just wild i didn't think he, Was LIKE him
But i, don't father them see. Was THE man, but, i,
say seem yeah he was. Wild as hell Father. THEM
was listen I got. ONE dmx Story Dmx and big

(01:03:39):
pun had a show in like a Baby. Arena in
brooklyn we went to the GAS station and dmx and
you hold up one second and stuck the guy up
for his chain and came back with the guy.

Speaker 3 (01:03:53):
Chain on And was, And, i'm like yo there's just
no way.

Speaker 1 (01:03:58):
This nigga just had the whole world going, get at
me dog and he sticked this nigga up for his
chain in. NIGGA gas station i didn't understand. How, That happens, Like,
i'm like, YO dmxi's yo DMN you know dmx MORNING
Anybody m dmx and he was he was seeing me at.
The gas station he was fulk that he, was talking

(01:04:20):
man and he. Seen my eye that motherfucker turned into a.
Whole other person just ma'am and. Does just, Ma'am thank
you oh. GOOD bliss shoes, I bet you. I love, you,
i said damn what kind of nigga is to turn into.
A sweet thing, This nigga turned, i'm telling you turn
into a church dude right in front of You know.
What i'm saying like he had another second get. In

(01:04:44):
the past he came to my show when he was
in The Back and dougie fresh was on the stage,
and HE said dem x. Was going up he has he.
Has some popeyees he had some. Girls with him he Was.
Eating the popeye he was on. One that night, he
was like. Fuck this ship, he, HE said, Hey i
said i'm gonna. Bring you, up, he said, well come
on bring me up and tell the nigga. To get
off Stated all this timmty ship talking about talking About

(01:05:08):
talking about duggy. Passes up there, that, sounded like man me.
Tell you something that nigga pulled me. Over that time
man me, pulled me over try to, Buy my car
and that nigga had a life skinned niggas was, about
six six. That was. Dusty he was he. WOULDN'T even,

(01:05:28):
smile i? Said? What's up man he wouldn't even? Say
what's wrong he, big light skin had a big. Square
box head that. NIGGA was, dusty, i said damn where'd you?
Get this? Nigga? Right here man you? Ordered this nigga
you want to? Know what's crazy what's wrong with just
being security or HOLDING somebody like I like when, I

(01:05:49):
come In i see, Jada kiss, crew, i'm like? Yo what's? Up? What's? Good? Y'all?

Speaker 3 (01:05:52):
This this that and you see let's Say Welcome.

Speaker 1 (01:05:55):
Home MAX bat max b just CAME off and i
see videos of of a round is going to say what's?
Up to him and his security is like looking at
the niggas like what are you? Supposed to do like
are you gonna beat up the rapper that's coming to say?
Hi to? Him welcome home they looking like like is?
That your job is that the? Qualification my nigga like

(01:06:16):
what is the? Qualification of it like if you know
they coming to say how to the brother he? Just
came home why are you looking at dudes like like
what are you? Getting at it all? That, is gone
yeah that's a. Little bit different what? W's y'all? Move
goot one what's y'all? Get? On ground everybody how?

Speaker 3 (01:06:41):
About you HERE the pap i seen niggas shoot at a.

Speaker 1 (01:06:45):
Nigga one, time one shotgun, two fucking nines. Four or
five's they was like having An Ok corrend papa boom
popa boom they nuts was hanging in the middle.

Speaker 3 (01:06:55):
Of the block nigga turned to run away with.

Speaker 1 (01:06:59):
The pat that said, The thing babe nigga's. Dove underneath
cars it. Was, no. More yeah hurrah it's a different
thing when you shooting at somebody who ain't. Got the
hammer the nigga turned around with the smallest caliber gunn
and say pat was like a diving underneath the. Cars
and ship they don't want that shipm back in the day,

(01:07:22):
Them twenty, two's oh yeah it's.

Speaker 3 (01:07:24):
A different story when, somebody's shooting back they.

Speaker 1 (01:07:26):
Don't, want that.

Speaker 3 (01:07:27):
Yeah, it's hard yeah everybody thinking when you're, shooting back here.

Speaker 1 (01:07:30):
Just like, the ketch up, the catch up win the
Catch up at let me tell. YOUR cold story i
had a butter that guy shot. In the stomach he had.
The ship pack those flags for that take. Their flags
back he had. A ship pack somebody shot him. In
the stomach he had. A ship pack didn't. Nobody know

(01:07:51):
it but he's. Still taught karate he was. A karate
teacher somebody did a back. Kick this ship don't you
know what. The word was you know what? The? Word
was Ship you know master McGee got ship kicked that
up up here at. The karate place master McGee got.

(01:08:12):
The ship kicked now you kick the. BAG bag busted
i told the. STORY on here i gotta, One Of,
them fat joe. Imagine every stories let me tell you,
One Of, them fat joe. Imagine Every stories but mayo.
WAS dead well i tell y'all Beat up. The karate
nigga they think Because, they know karate You beat. The
karate nigga karate nigga used to come to school with

(01:08:34):
the trophy every. Day the moccasins one day he said
some wild. SHIP to, Me, i said, yo want man
who the fuck You? Talking to karate, he was like
y'o be, YOU don't nigga i beat Them up. The
karate nigga that ship don't work. In The streets the
karate ship do not work. IN the streets i never

(01:08:55):
seen the guy, Bost out karate to be, HONEST with
you i know that's for like, discipline Or whatever but
i've never seen nobody.

Speaker 3 (01:09:02):
Bust out there have you ever seen somebody?

Speaker 1 (01:09:04):
Run? Out through? Yo? What's up? Nigga was, good was good.
AND he's start i never you who get this ship?

Speaker 3 (01:09:11):
Kicked OUT of.

Speaker 1 (01:09:12):
Can i tell you who to fuck you up with?
A suit on the ship.

Speaker 3 (01:09:15):
Out of The fucking The nation of islam will fuck
you up with.

Speaker 1 (01:09:20):
A suit on, You'd, be like god Damn niggas got
i'm talking about everything v and didn't. Help. You out
brother you need to get, your, Life, together brother yeah get. Your. Life,
forgether brother brother we could teach. You, some, lessons yeah brother.
Get on up don't have to make me do that. To,
you again brother in the name of, a live brother,

(01:09:43):
stand on now get. On bout here, That's right right.
I'm with you ever, do, AN event no i don't want.
TO do it i know. The nation is you're talking to.
THE wrong guy i know the nation that is long
shout out my brother off. The four as now you're
the biggest one, IN the. Game i, know, All yeah yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:10:03):
I'm, gonna, stop Yeah stop brother nouri.

Speaker 1 (01:10:06):
And.

Speaker 3 (01:10:06):
All that see i'm gonna tell you Something about The.

Speaker 1 (01:10:08):
Nation of islam if you ever do anything, around black
people always call the because what they do is they
always they have the ability to. Neutralize color. PEOPLE i'm
serious i don't know what it. IS about them i
don't Give A damn and I live in la that crips.

(01:10:29):
And blood shit if you bring them, around each other
they gonna fight and. Kill each Other But when nation,
ISLAM is there i don't know. What it is it's
almost like caretakers for the niggas. In the, Streets i'm serious.
It's like babysitters they like. Babysitters for motherfucker because, you
know what when you got somebody, and ignorant motherfucker just

(01:10:51):
calm down when they see that time got somebody people
and transform them and give them jobs and fucking do
positive for they. For their people and they was. Just
like you, you respect Them are frit the respect level
is all about everything in life. Is the respect have
you ever stole, SOMETHING about well i ain't still Nothing

(01:11:13):
from The, nation of islam not a bean By. Nothing
bro modell's have you ever Stole? SOMETHING from modell's i
stole stuff from a. Lot of places i'm gonna be,
honest with, you hey man a lot of where, you,
WAS hungry man i asked what? You were hungry hungry.

(01:11:33):
Like a motherfucker we used to Play spades in there'll
Go Swimming. At Katona. Pool katona pool we didn't have
no po and you was hungry as hell when you
Was Done.

Speaker 3 (01:11:43):
Eating, katona pool right let me.

Speaker 1 (01:11:45):
Tell you something, after you, swim go swimming you be
hungry as a. Mother play spades whoever lose spades gotta
go to, The bowl daega and still you be like
you all want some sweet. SALT vinegar chips i want
some CHEF. Boy r d then they tell you it's steal.
The ice cream you got to steal an ice cream In,
Front of poppy you will? Get your? Ass? What right

(01:12:08):
so but we had to that. Was the ship if
you lost, the spades game you gotta go in there
and steal whatever's on the list and come. Back with
it when they, do catch you you?

Speaker 3 (01:12:18):
Getting your?

Speaker 1 (01:12:18):
Ass what? Like what like i've been in places where
they'll beat the brakes off you for. Stealing some ship,
then they won't they won't put. You in jail that just.
Whipped your ass.

Speaker 3 (01:12:31):
Did You Ever see jeff red when you, Was a
kid you Ever Heard?

Speaker 1 (01:12:34):
Of? JEFF red yeah i see jeff. THAT'S a player i.
Ain't a Man Old school jeff red. Used to sing
that Was from mount what was this? SONG he saw i?
Called you Called That was andre herrel is one of? His,
first ads. Yeah first artists What About? T lo rock

(01:12:56):
did you? EVER meet Him. I know LeBrock let me
Tell you about i'm gonna Tell you about telor about comeditating.
Illustrating discription given let me. Tell you something he still
comes to. My, store shops wow he. Ain't a bumpy
he come there you drop money on so many people.
Use This song teelor rock was. Ahead of time he come.

(01:13:17):
To my store you? Know who else rral from nextenever.
He in town he come dropped four or five thousand.
In the. STORE he's doing i could tell you where's The. Store,
in miami now we got three stores up Here, In
the Bronx Harlem.

Speaker 3 (01:13:29):
And washington hires they just sold me at ten.

Speaker 1 (01:13:32):
And a half and. They hate that. That's the tip
they had to meet and going, to your store sir.
YA ya might. I appreciate that i was just thinking about.
Going your might they had to. MEET the, quota, I
said yo i need ten pairs of. Tim sold today
they sold kissed. The size twelve. That's the oldest. YOU

(01:13:56):
know what. I blame you. I blame you you Shouldn't
have got. God like that but he told. ME that
ship i knew it. Wasn't a mistake he told, me
like this flipped. The box up let's just. Set me
in but he told, ME that, shit i said but.
They did. IT they kiss i called the nigga face
something there over there, LAUGHING this, Year, i said yo

(01:14:17):
this kiss. Is. My partner man how you're gonna do
it fucking kids. Used to be THEY act like i
have to brow up this. One big leg You know.

Speaker 3 (01:14:29):
What i'm saying you.

Speaker 1 (01:14:30):
Had, the hey man was there any girl that you
wanted and you couldn't get when, You wasn't famous and
when you got famous you kind of went looking and
when you're singing there you you couldn't believe. You wanted,
HER you know i don't want to. LIE to you
i never had. A confidence problem SO even since i was,
A young nigga i always HAD all that i thought that,
was THE ship and i would go into THE spot

(01:14:52):
and i would wrap. To the baddest even when you're
In That, Fat Fat Joe fat fat joe was walking
around Thinking he was prince, Charm, my nigga like are?
YOU kidding me i never had. A confidence problem i
owned The name Fat joe since i'm fucking. Three years Old.
HEY fat joey I never thought, I was like i'm
not walking out there with the. BEST of them i

(01:15:13):
got green eyes and fly smelled. Good, On me jacket
i'm probably. Give a fuck i'm. Proud of you i'm,
happy for you, for fair tims. You and true i'll
tell you one thing they used to want to whip
my ass OUT there because i always had. The baddest
Chicks so what i'm telling YOU is and i was
the most ignorant ghetto nigga you ever seen in the.

(01:15:37):
History Of mankind like, I'D be like i had this
one girl in the whole neighborhood want to kill Me
over and, I'd.

Speaker 3 (01:15:43):
Be like yo?

Speaker 1 (01:15:45):
Was you mad you just fast? Such as, such come
down niggas is tight like they mad you even, talking
to now niggas is looking, at, me like yo.

Speaker 3 (01:15:54):
IT'S a movie i didn't?

Speaker 1 (01:15:56):
Make you mad was you mad because YOU just fa
i used to drive Around on The bronx and harlem with,
no shirt on in ten chains in the jeep with.
THE top wolf i never gave it anything about the
girl FROM S W v coco coco from shirt she, from.

Speaker 3 (01:16:13):
My projects she telling me, all.

Speaker 1 (01:16:15):
THE time, y'all i Know fat fat joey no shirt on,
in the summer don't. GIVE a fuck i never. GAVE
a fuck i never looked at it. As a disability.
Draws ON nothing just i, ain't saying, that just shorts, cracking,
Ass chain right i'm. Not saying that you know you
ain't had no, drawers all man under. The basketball shorts

(01:16:36):
you know you had no drawers on in front of, them,
basketball shorts, man you know the shorts on with, no
drawers on, up on them sweaty stuck on the motherfucker
bronx on THE on the fdr SWEATING went ten tn on.
Chest h hot, this ain't that this is the biggest
in the fucking, game. Year, me y'all Listen, Listen, Your,

(01:16:59):
MIKE yo mike i don't, Give, A fuck, mike Like,
Listen fat. JOE fat y'all i. NEVER been scared i.
Never been unconfident.

Speaker 3 (01:17:13):
You're right because you have. A beautiful wife You.

Speaker 1 (01:17:15):
Have, my god listen you have, a beautiful Wife and
and i'm. Not GONNA lie when i first, SEEN y'all together,
i was like how the fuck did? He, GET her
hey i. GOT broke too i was, broke. LIKE this
big i don't, give, A fuck man i Never gave a,
you know what she must have seen that you was
gonna lose the. Weight, one day, Nah she said i'm

(01:17:38):
gonna Get a good joe. Out of this you would
have to be. A scientist too you would have to
be a fucking fortune telling the, predict you oh one
day there'll be a drug. Call o zempec. He'll lose,
weight this Ship this old zeppe ship, out. Of control
huh and these niggas made everybody. Mad at. PUFFY they was,

(01:18:00):
i was like the locks, made everybody like why don't? He? Leave, Them,
niggas ah god damn. Let him go they was. Smothering
you man and then by the time you got on
that versus it. Was like vindication, it, was like damn
what about when they start hitting animals with those but

(01:18:23):
to go? Get skinnier animals it is the Hit, them
with listen let me.

Speaker 3 (01:18:29):
Tell you something they need. O z empic they need
to change that ship.

Speaker 1 (01:18:33):
For liquor too and WHATEVER got niggas i knew got
shot and survived.

Speaker 3 (01:18:38):
For being fat. Yeah me too my buddy. Got hit
doctor doctor told niggas.

Speaker 1 (01:18:44):
The. Same ship yo if you ain't, have, this fat
yeah you, vived right now. You will die but let
me tell you, something they. Died fat Niggas its Thataid
that old zempi is. A transforming drug that, Shit saving
lives like you know they trying to get that get
that ship, up for, cheat you know because you know
that's saved. So many guys all of this stuff. Is

(01:19:06):
linked together like when YOU think about i mean like
people are really Really, Upset with trump but if you
really really, think about it if you think about the
whole grand, scheme of things what he's taking away from
people is really a tricker or effect. Of unhealthy ship,

(01:19:27):
THE food stamps i. KNOW nobody is i never seen
nobody spend no food stamps. AND whole foods i heard,
they ACCEPT them but i ain't never seen nobody pull
none out at. The fucking cash it ain't, Enough for
that but you, got the places a healthy. PLACE to
eat i think people buy cheetos And Bullshit with and
i'm just saying this. FOR black. PEOPLE i know i know.

(01:19:48):
Motherfuckers Get mad. Spanish black people they. Say this's war
more white people on Food stamps. Than black people, it
may be, but black people let the. Fucking shit go
i'm tired of seeing three generationations of mothers on. Fucking
food stamps. It's over with let let let them take
that you're taking away From food stand.

Speaker 3 (01:20:07):
Let that be guess what this is. THE start of.

Speaker 1 (01:20:12):
I don't need that.

Speaker 3 (01:20:12):
Shit no more i'm gonna tell YOU something because.

Speaker 1 (01:20:15):
I was there when food, stamps came out the projects
and food stamp they came out.

Speaker 4 (01:20:19):
In our.

Speaker 1 (01:20:20):
Era they temporary they should. Have been temporary and so
what happens when you stuck in? The problem mothersbody, they,
paying cheap yes but it stops you from getting, a good,
job of competing of becoming. A real boss so all
this shit is gimmick and systemic to hold you. Back,
from competing yes You know, what I'm saying. But i'm.
Not i'm not there's some people that. Really need it

(01:20:42):
there's some people. That need it there's some people that.
Really need saying the people, who work people. They need
it now they're all. Some food stamps so whatever the,
CASE may be i can't on. Single parent moms the
pops don't. Give a fuck they. Need that food and
you know that at the time, we needed them food
really came in. Handy. For me man so it's. BUY something,

(01:21:04):
NOW i know i gotta pluck To buy or i'll
take you up to. The save home they, start selling
lucies but sit Out. There the lucy's but, you know
what it's time for everybody, to get healthy it's time for,
Everybody being dependent it's time for everybody to work. For
their future if you're dependent on these things, for too

(01:21:24):
long you're. Out the game and think. ABOUT the potential
i grew up. In THE projects jay z grew up.
In the proper we grew up eating. The worst shit
but IMAGINE if jay z, Would, HAVE said yo i.
WANT food stamps i don't. WANT to compete i don't
want to SHOW how. SMART i am i don't want
To show them i'm. A genius this i'm cool with
the one hundred dollars rent and all this ship went.

(01:21:47):
Over on stamps i'm. Not saying that i'm not saying that's.
What you say that's that a five minute, imagine you
said Imagine whole jay. Z on stamps i have family
members and with the still the. SAME family members i
have family members, in the stamps with the same members

(01:22:08):
who told me they don't WANT to be i can't
imagine family members, Who, told me yo all we want.

Speaker 3 (01:22:16):
Is the stamps.

Speaker 1 (01:22:17):
WE don't care, i rent, this paid this this, That,
With them yo but don't you want to? Go to
college don't you want to? Get a hat don't you
want to? Now comfortable, HERE i've literally I, SWEAR to
god i have family members who don't want to be
nothing more but than. On section eight, You, know why
joe because the responsibility, is too great the most the

(01:22:40):
scariest thing in the, world is responsibility and people don't
understand that you. Can manage it but you gotta manage your.
Personal life too people don't know all. Of us connected,
you drinking water, You're being healthy all of this is
connected to you, in uh. Uh that's right and that

(01:23:03):
responsible connected to you. Being a businessman that responsible connected to.
You being one you missing one link, out, of that
motherfucker ain't none.

Speaker 3 (01:23:11):
Ever gonna work you got to cover every.

Speaker 1 (01:23:14):
Base of that and that's what they don't teach the
kids that, they tell them motherfucker do one of them and.

Speaker 3 (01:23:19):
Don't teach another three, guys in jail there's a lot
of gonna, wash your hands turn.

Speaker 1 (01:23:23):
OUT too long i gotta catch a case and go
back in there because they don't want to pay Out
wash your but. This ain't that that ain't this, this
cracking kiss cocksucking noise. From my catchack that was, hot,
right there man

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Joe and Jada - Mike Epps tells WILD Jay-Z & DMX stories, talks Dave Chappelle & top 5 standups

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Joe and Jada - Mike Epps tells WILD Jay-Z & DMX stories, talks Dave Chappelle & top 5 standups