Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:04):
Noly serial with your theme when you hand a jam.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Oh man, I can't anymore. I have to get to
this right away. Okay, welcome to Serial Killers. It's episode
one twenty six. Today is Monday. I hope you had
a great weekend, and what we're going to try today
is going to make you have a great week. Of course,
you probably won't be able to try it yet because
(00:30):
my secret squirrel Joel from my friend Yes, he reached
out to me before he went on vacation. He's like, dude,
you gotta come in. I just put this on the
shelf and I have a box on my office for you,
and it is brand new, Like we just got to
get right into it, because this should have been a
bonus episode. But I just didn't feel.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Like you are freaking out right now. I am.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Look how excited I I see here. By the way,
I'm so happy that you're here.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
I'm so happy to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
I have a feeling we're breaking all kinds of rules
that you're in the building.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
But whatever, I have quarantined for a solid two weeks.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
In the each house with all those people in the
shirtless guy.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Okay, so no, I was there literally three weeks ago,
and then I quarantined for two weeks. I'm fine.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
So you just stayed in your apartment NonStop. You didn't
go anything.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
I went to my parents' house. I don't know, but
and then I stay inside.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
That quicker each guy he's dirty.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Well thanks for calling my dad dirty.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
All right, let's just get right into it, because this,
I it's weird because I saw it online like a
week and a half ago, and it came out so
fast or I was able to get it anyway, it
was quick turn around on this.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
Kellogg's cookies and cream Crispies. I'm in Look, I'm looking.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
There's a box. Look a snap is like what? Look
he's look at him, Look at him. He's listening and
there's some kind of I hope that sound that's going
into his ear because if not, he's got an ear
full of dust. Crackles holding the cookie. Now it's not
an Oreo because this is not Oreo branded. That is
a chocolate cream sandwich cookie.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Yeah, I was gonna say it looks like an ice
cream sandwich.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
It's probably a hydrox old school, what's.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
A hydro yes? Seriously, what the hell is hydrogs?
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Really? Really Hidrogs is probably older than Oreo from the
Sunshine Bakeries, and they came back briefly a couple of
years ago. Hidros was I think. Don't quote me, but
I think Hydros was the original sandwich cookie. Okay, I
believe it's older than Oreo. I could be wrong, okay,
but I think that they've been around. You know, remember
the big fat Sunshine Bakery guy.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I have no idea what you're talking to.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
Sunshine Baker, zero clue, Sunshine cookies and crackers.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
You just keep naming things at this point, all right.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
And then Pop is pouring milk and out of a
cream container, which there's no way that well, just never mind.
All right, let's get into this because it's very excited.
It says cookies and cream crispies flavored with other natural flavors.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Have you been working on your Spanish while I was gone?
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Yeah? I have. Wow, I've been using that Babbel thing.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Oh yeah, Babel's good. Yeah, all right, I let me
tell you something. It is hot in New York City.
My armpits are sweaty. This isn't nice.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
I see it.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
That's bad. Now, thank you. You're not supposed to say Wow,
and you still need a haircut.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
See.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Look, I'm getting haircut today with the masks.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
The rice crisp First of all, they don't call these
rice crispies. They're just crispies, which I think is odd
and I'm gonna have to get into that in a
minute by looking at the ingredients. But if you look
at the crispies in the bowl that they're showing you,
there's a lot of chocolate specks. If you look at
the crispies in the bag the money, yeah, I have
to say.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
On the front of the box, it almost looks like
a salt and pepper popcorn. I love salt and pepper popcorn.
Have you ever had that?
Speaker 2 (03:29):
I'm not a fan.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Oh I love it so much. Yeah, but no, it
just looks like white crispies in there.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Yeah. See, Now this is what when I told my
kids about this, they were so excited that they wanted
to make rice crispy treats out of them, because that
is probably delicious. But then again, we don't know what
the cereal tastes like. So let's check it out.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
I have a feeling is this going to be a
huge slightdown and it's just going to taste like rice crispies.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
No, it smells like chocolate, sandwich cookies.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Why do you keep saying cookies like that?
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Cookieswitch cookies? Here you go, cookies.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
You keep saying it like that? Can you say it again? Cookies?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Why do you say it like that?
Speaker 2 (04:03):
How do you say cookies?
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Cookies?
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Cookies?
Speaker 1 (04:06):
No, you're like cookies, so.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
You don't say cook as if you cook, you say cook.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Hello, I'm Scottie Bee, and today we're having cookies. You
sound like, Oh they're so loud. Listen to them. Quick, listen.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
These are snap crackle and popping louder than regular rice crispies.
I'm gonna tell you that you were your eyes. You're
such an you know what? Now I remember why I
didn't like that you. Oh, this spoon is dirty as
your horse.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
No, I don't think so. I have to say it's
a very unattractive cereal.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Why it looks like dural mold.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Yeah, let's see, I don't hate it.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
I don't really taste chocolate.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
The smell is cocoa pebbles.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
The taste is smells, not cocoa pebbles.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Is a sweet rice crispy yeah, good.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Uh, it's not much different than frosted Crispies. There's just
like a hint watch frosted Crispies. There's just a hint
of chocolate.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
Yeah, I would say the coopies don't really add much
of a flavor to it. But I like it, so
I give it three balls.
Speaker 2 (05:15):
I give it four balls.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Oh okay, Wow, he's really good. Huh. By the way, Okay.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
I think I discovered something while I was arranging the
Cereal Museum back here. Huh, because as I was putting
up a box of Kashi Go, Yeah, I found a bug?
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Is there a roach?
Speaker 2 (05:32):
I found another box of Koshi Go say one.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
That means we've had it.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
I think that we did Kashi Go play twice. I'm
gonna have to go back and look at the comprehensive
list that you have not updated in months.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
But oh, because when I did do it, you were
joining the chorus of people saying, excuse me, it's impossible
to read. I hate it.
Speaker 2 (05:56):
You also have an updated I've sent you updates multiple
times in the same thing is just sitting there. Hey,
can we have one of our like computer savvy listeners
make some cool Can we have one.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Of the kids who do things with the dude asks
to get on there and make the list better.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
I just think, okay, sorry, like some graphic person that
you know is skilled in these things.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
So a graphic person is different than someone who's good
on like an Excel program.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
Well yeah, because graphic people can do graphics. Like some
graphic artists, they can put together this cool maybe they
could cut and paste. They can put together like some
cool list with clickable things and pictures of boxes and
you know, okay, maybe when you click on the radio,
it will have me going five balls and you're going ball. No.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
So now we're adding sound effects like you're going straight
up nineties, like you click.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
It, Welcome, You've got mail.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
That's actually really good.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Yeah, well that was me.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Shut up, I know. All right. Wait, I think we
did this one with Michelle. I don't I think we did.
We did a Kashi go with her.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
Yeah, it wasn't that one. I think it was the
coconut one. Dude, your pits are really no.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Yeah it was warm.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
I go from inside my apartment which is cold, to
then outside and then I melt.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Oh all right, So the next cereal, which would.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
Be it's warm in here.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
No, it isn't. It's sixty nine degrees. I always keep
it at sixty nine. It's my favorite number.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Okay, right, cool.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
The next cereal is the classic, and this one's really classic.
This one was first introduced in nineteen oh seven. Okay,
we have had the nephew of this cereal with raisins,
and this is just the plain one. If you can guess,
I'll give you one thousand dollars. We've had the one
with raisins.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
So I feel like.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
It's a it's an obscure cereal, but it's old.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
I feel like it's like brand crunch. What something brandish?
Speaker 2 (07:45):
What's the brand name?
Speaker 1 (07:46):
No? No, I was saying bran, like a brand flake.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Not really.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
What's the one with the chicken the chicken corn flakes? Yeah,
that's a cock? Okay, we did did we do that one?
Did we do corn?
Speaker 2 (08:01):
Thank you for listening to Serial Killers? This is the
last moment of this show, because have we done cornflat? Dude?
Speaker 1 (08:06):
We've done pretty.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
We've done every single cereal that post Kellogg's General Mills
has made. Okay, and mostly other brands as well. The
people you know what. Okay, here's where I'm gonna go
because people send any pictures did you do this? And look,
I love you guys for asking me if we did
Hershey kisses cereal, But yeah, if you see it in
the supermarket, we did it. The name brand stuff. We
(08:30):
haven't done a lot of this stuff, all the way
to the right and all the way to the left,
because it's the healthier, more expensive stuff and I really
don't want to pay six dollars a box.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
So if I could just make a website, like, do
you think I could just make a serial killer's website? Yeah? Sure,
And then if we did that, it would just have
like the episode what cereals we try, and then people
could click it for the ratings.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
But here's the thing. Before this podcast airs, I have
to go to go daddy and see if serial Killers
with the Sea is available. I will because someone will
go to steal it.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Let's see how much it is, Okay, we will.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
Just we're in the middle of recording here.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
Okay, so you take at least five minutes to go
find like the most random noises. And I have to
sit on the other side when I was home and
just sit there while you would go hold on one
sec andy, hold on and then you play some obscure
ninety song and be like you don't know this, but
you won't go look if our website is available. Why
are you playing the Chips theme? What does that even mean?
(09:20):
It doesn't mean anything.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
It doesn't mean anything. All right, anyway, let's.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
Just go go on, go daddy. Then can we move on?
I just wanted off track. I don't you are? Wow?
All this time away and you still haven't changed, just
as curmudgeye as you were before.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
I feel like we're nicer to each other when we're
not in the same room.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Uh No, we were pretty mean to each other.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Okay, So anyway, this is the cereal that we did.
Please look up from here, Sam, Uncle Sam with raisins.
So here's the original down here in a cereal sack.
Oh you know what I tell you? I must be
wrong on the web. The web over there said since
nineteen o seven, right here on the box, since nineteen
oh eight. Who's telling the truth has some misinformation? Anyway,
(10:01):
Uncle Sam toasted whole wheat berry flakes and flax seed cereal.
Now it's not berries as in like strawberries. They just
call like the top of the wheat the berry okay,
you like see the wheat that grows in the field there, Yeah,
that's the berry this thing.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
What did you know that?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Now the little parts of the wheat that are actually
the wheat are called the wheat berries.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
I don't know that you learned something new every day,
I guess. So all right, Scotti shake, oh oh god?
And now we pause. Well, Scotty finds a sound effect. No,
we don't pause. Serial Killers is taken.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
We don't pause because I just edited out ready, Scotty.
You know we haven't played any We haven't played anything. Yea,
when you're not here, I don't play anything.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
You really get in your fill of jingles.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Very excited. All right, sounds uncle Sam. It's a small
small box.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
Also, I would like to clarify it. In that house,
there was less than ten people. It was not a
house full of people like you're making it out to be.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
There was a rare or you had kegs and everything.
I know. It was a big crazy ragers in every
Jersey Shore beach party, I know, I know. Yeah, the
shirtless guy that Tommy and Gina that kept coming over
Tommy and Gina, Yeah, there was no Gina. Gina was
there if Tommy was there, Gina was there.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
What are you saying?
Speaker 2 (11:16):
You don't even listen to the podcast?
Speaker 1 (11:19):
He didn't listen to that one. Yes, you did, you
lived it? I did. I just have selective memory lost.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
Look at the size of this bag, by the way.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
But there were less than ten people in that home.
Scottie will not.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
You can make mark my name, make all the excuses
that you want. You had a big old beach party.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
I did not have a big old beach party.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
Ten people can't fit in a little shorehouse.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
They can when there's enough rooms.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
They were all winter from Survivors, so they had millions
of dollars that we had a massive mention.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
And then there was me. It was a cereal how do.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
You fit into that crew? Like you want to be
on Survivor? But they all were like, you get in there.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
So I was invited by Michelle to go. And then
I guess everybody whoever's ever played Survivor, they're all friendly
with each other. I guess because they all did something together.
So do you feel weird being there? Yeah? I mean
when they start to talk about like the experience, I'm
kind of like, yeah, I went camping once.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
It was pretty cool, like, oh yeah, ah, the immunity idol?
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Did I say that right? I guess is that a thing?
Speaker 1 (12:20):
Yeah? H oh yeah, that's I think Big Brother. And
let me tell you something after quarantine, uh huh. I
will never, ever, ever, ever go on a show that
traps you in a house. I will not go in
the real world. I would never go on what's it
called The Big Brother? How do those people sit in
a house for like one hundred days?
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Your phone is buzzing, my millennial do dad? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Yeah. I would never do a reality show where you're
stuck in a house. I find that to be terrifying.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Well, everyone's life has been a reality show. Is stuck
in a house for the last four months?
Speaker 1 (12:51):
True?
Speaker 2 (12:51):
So Big Brother means nothing? Now? All right, here we go,
Uncle Sam.
Speaker 1 (12:56):
This is so like, it's just oats.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
I mean, this is grandparents cereal, Uncle Sam, and grape nuts.
Speaker 1 (13:03):
They you know, I love grape nuts, got.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Married and had a kid and they had brand buds
what brand? But I don't know. It is disgusting. Look,
you don't have to spit it out, but there's not
good and that might not be good because we just
had sweet rice crostbes it's very just bland, and bland
(13:27):
is not even the wards. If you toasted cardboard, that's
what this would taste like. Don't cough, dude, you're shooting
your covid over here. There's droplets everywhere. Cut it out.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
It's disgusting.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
I feel like you just went in a wheat field
in Iowa or whoever grows wheat. Iowa's corn, but I
think they have wheat too. I remember seeing wheat when
I lived there.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
But it's like you couldn't you lived there for nine months.
You can't keep saying this. You keep going like when
I lived in Iowa. It's like, Okay, you live there
for first you said nine months there.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
By the way, do you know that Ashton Kutcher all right,
who was born and raised in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. Yeah,
worked at General Mills. No, yes, that was his very
first job. He would sweep up cereal dust at General
Mills in Cedar Rapids.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
Let me let me just guess when you lived there,
the old you lived there.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
We probably could have been boys about the same age you.
Oh my god, you just said we would have been
boys if I knew.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
Look, if I could have lived in Cedar rapids for
ten months. Dude.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
If I could have worked at General Mills, Oh my god. See,
I would pass the Quaker Roads factory every day. I
didn't know General Mills was there until recently. It makes
me very excited to know that I lived in the
city with two giant cereal companies.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Wow, all right, I can't. I can't with you. I can't,
I literally cannot.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
What road trip to Battle Creek?
Speaker 1 (14:44):
What?
Speaker 2 (14:45):
What's battle Creek?
Speaker 1 (14:46):
What are you saying? You're just saying words.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
You don't know what Battle Creek is?
Speaker 1 (14:50):
Isn't was there a war there? Is it a famous cereal?
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Does somebody have a defibrillator? No, it's Kellogg's. That's where
Callogg's is from. Kellogg's Battle Creek, Michigan.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Dude. Oh, we've talked about this so many times. Yeah,
that's cool. That's cool.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
You youngsters in your mind altering drugs.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
I'm not even on drugs. What are you talking about?
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Thank you for listening to Serial Killers.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Has been probably serious.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Whit do we rate it?
Speaker 1 (15:13):
No?
Speaker 2 (15:13):
We didn't read. No.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
I give it a bowl, No, I give it a spoon.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
I'm going to give it a ball. It's bad, but
I'll give it a ball, No, I give it? Okay, yeah,
just two cereals because this was going to be a
bonus episode. But then I decided, Eh, let's just make
it a red What the phone? Who is this?
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Okay? Your phone rang in the last episode and I
did not call you out. I did not do anything
because we had a guest. My phone vibrates so low
that it doesn't even pick up on the microphone. Feel
it though, you can feel it?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Can you please text them telling me you're doing something
very important?
Speaker 1 (15:40):
No?
Speaker 2 (15:40):
Is it the shirtless guy from the Survivor House?
Speaker 1 (15:42):
No?
Speaker 2 (15:43):
All right, thank you for listening to Serial Killers. This
has been episode one, twenty six and I hope you
have a great week. We'll see you on Friday.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Great. I'm in, I'm invested.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Please follow us Buckle in social media, all of them
serial Killers PC, and please rate us and like us
and subscribe and everything. We've had some really nice reviews.
Yes on Apple i Tunes.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
We're back in the top twenty food podcast things. Did
you know that? Yeah, we are a top twenty food podcast.
What does that mean in the long run for us?
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
Shouldn't a top twenty food podcast be making thousands of
dollars a week in advertising.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
Well, our PayPal is all set up, so I actually
owe you some money.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Oh, it's finally set up after months of you saying
that we've been making money.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
Yeah, I have it. There's hundreds of dollars in there.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Oh I can buy some milk.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
Yes you can.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
But we should still be have advertisers. Well, the thing
is with Spreaker, they put ads in it for us.
That's why, like half the ads that you hear, or
all of the ads, there were a.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Bunch of j C penny ads in Spanish. People were
reaching out. I'm like, yeah, it's a seal oi so that.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
I cease to exist. I can't.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Yeah, Spreaker just inputs ads for us, and so yeah,
JC pennies and Spanish.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
There didn't Serious XM just buy stitch right, huh Stitcher
they did. Are we on Stitcher?
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Yeah we're on Stitcher.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Yeah. Serious sex Sum just bought them. Oh cool, So
they'll probably kick us off too, just like they did
the morning show.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
Huh hmm. No, I think we're fine, right, I'll just
have to go check that after the show.
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Again. Thank you for listening. We appreciate you. We're really
doing Pandora too.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
I forgot to say that there's only like a select
number of podcasts that were chosen to be on Pandora,
and we're one of them.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Oh, they chose us, but nobody's paying us anything.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
That's pretty Now, well, we need an agent. I found
a good website, but to maybe get us advertisers. But
the thing is, then you have to write a pitch.
I don't want to write a pitch.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
I just want free milk. That's all I want.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
With the money that we made last month, you will
have more than enough to buy milk.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
But we should have a milk company that wants to
give us milk.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Okay, so you can't last that rip empty. You got
to look at a half fall.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
So like Borden should give us a cow, I'll keep
a cow here.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
We could just there is no no room for a cow,
so it's the room I cleaned up. We could just
just scored the otter right into my cup. I have
not been here in four months, and you have not
cleaned one bit. You went from after every Christmas being
like that's my big day to clean up, Your big
day to clean up hasn't happened in two years. This
place is a pig style. That's what we should get
a pig.
Speaker 2 (18:11):
Well recently, I just you know what, we should get
a pig because it would eat all the old cereal
so and just throw all these hard cereals into a trough.
I just let the pig eat every.
Speaker 1 (18:19):
Why don't you just get rid of the old cereals?
But look how cool the boxes look. I don't find
boxes cool. Just cut out the logos and don't even
find cereal cool.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
What are you doing here?
Speaker 1 (18:30):
I think what you should do. This is a clean
space for you to put up your Okay, good, you
were gonna cut them out.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Remember what's cutting them out gonna do? When you save
cereal boxes, you want the whole box. It's a thing.
You flatten it and then years later you're like, oh,
look at the Christmas tree on the back.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Then why don't we do this? Why don't I get
you like a big portfolio book? No, because no one
could see it.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
I want people to come in, just like Greg Jonas
brother's guy. He came in that day and was like,
whoa if we had a book.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
He wouldn't even know that we existed. We are living
in a pandemic. No one is coming in here for years.
We gotta go see you on Friday.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
Thank you for listening to serial Killers, Love you, take
care and Crunch Crunch. Oh my god, I thought I
missed you, but I just don't.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
You are a hot mess.