Being Impatient and Chipping In At Work

Elvis read a list about being impatient and we talked about not chipping in on coworkers gifts.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
Firms Represents show. We've got fifteen minutes. Let's make it interesting.
I have a few things to talk about around the table.
Of course, it's Gandhi. Great to the frat boy. There's

(00:23):
Danielle Straighten Aid and scar Ese here. Hello Hotez. Alright,
let's talk about patients. I have none of it. Okay, okay, sorry. Look,
I know a lot of people listening are in traffic.

(00:43):
Uh you know, Look, I know traffic. This is one
of the things I love about waking up at the
ass crack of dawn. Uh there's no traffic. We don't
have to deal with waiting for long lights or getting
through a tunnel or whatever. Uh So, how about anyone
here in with patients? Anyone have patience? I had. I

(01:04):
feel like I have more patients after I had kids
because I was kind of forced to have more patients.
But before that, No, I think it really just depends
on like the day and the time, because most of
the time I'm really laid back. But every now and then,
if I'm just like tired or something's going on, I'll snap.
So let's say you're waiting for a website to load.
No patience, Yeah, it should load. I will too, even

(01:26):
if there's something you need from that website. You click,
you click, boom, and it's like they're saying, on average,
fifteen seconds, which I think is a long time to
wait for a website. To fifteen seconds. People leave, they're gone,
waiting for a movie or TV show to start streaming.
You watch that streaming, You watch that little little the

(01:49):
little bar get bigger and bigger, they're saying, twenty two seconds,
and then you're done, or perhaps a dirty video I've
heard from friends, and then you smack. Do you ever
smack at him? To that? I go, what the hell's
wrong with the smacking? Smacking? Your laptop isn't gonna work?
Let me ask you, great tea. Let's say you get
to work here at the Elvis Drain Morning Show building

(02:09):
and you push the up button for the elevator. Yeah,
they're actually very fast in our in our building for
some reason. But how long will you wait until you
get a little nuts? I didn't know immediately, So like
if the doors closed and then for for some reason,
it starts blinking, blinking, blinking, like it's not really ready
to go. It throws me all off, I'm Superman already. Okay, okay,

(02:29):
I'm like, let's go. I will continue with this list
in a second. But think about all the things that
you get so impatient over so quickly, and then why
the question is why, I mean really in that big
of a hurry exactly? I don't know. I was having
this conversation on vacation. Yeah, yeah, because your boyfriend has
no patient. I think WiFi. I think WiFi did it

(02:51):
to us because with WiFi, you get it immediately. So
now we're used to like everything going to be immediate sometimes,
but when WiFi is running slowly right, it's like end
of the earth. For instance, the other day, I was
watching scary throw something in the microwave. You take it
out with four seconds left, you know too well. I
was about to say that same exact thing. I'm microwave
interrupt guy, and then I don't hit the button on it.

(03:13):
It'll just sit there with the four seconds. If I
walk by a microwave four seconds on it, I know
that's scary eating something. How much more can it warm
your food? But I gotta be honest, see, I'm as
you know, I love food, I love cooking. I have
this inner since I know when it's been in the
microwave too long and immediately turned it off. I don't

(03:34):
care how much long as you left, Okay, So yeah, yeah,
I know because if you don't want it to go,
because sometimes if leaves crapp in the microwave too long,
it just overcooks, it kills it. This happened to me
last night. I was making these little um bagel balls.
Have you ever had them? I'm sorry. They're bagels, but
they look like munchkins from Dunkin Donuts and they have
cream cheese inside of them, and they come in different flavors.

(03:55):
You'll ruin them. They're really good. I put him in
for too long and they were hard as a rock
and the cream te's exploded all over the microwa, you know, okay,
So uh okay. Let's say you're going to a bar
and you're gonna wait at the bar for a drink.
They're busy. Look, you know bartenders, the good ones, they
know you're there, but they also sort of know the

(04:16):
you know, the line and when people arrived and who's first. Whatever.
They're saying seven minutes in this survey, we'll wait seven
minutes for a drink. That's a long time. Seven minutes. No,
I won't either. Scary starts waving cash. Oh my god,
he's that guy and I used to be a bartender.
That doesn't work. They hate it sometimes. Uh. After a flight,

(04:41):
how long are you okay to wait for your luggage?
Want to go? That's why most of us take carry
on because we have no patience for that. When we
fly with great Tea and Scary they always check their luggage.
You have to wait for them. What is it with you?
What straight now flight? When you're waiting for those people
in front of you to stand up and get their
bags and walk down the aisle, that drives me nuts.

(05:04):
You should be ready to jump out of the plane.
Don't sit there and wait for people to walk by.
You've been on the plane long enough. But at the
same time, I have no patience for the people who
stand up as soon as land and they run to
the exit land etiquette, There is etiquette. It's a line
and you go one row, next row. I'll go. Yes.
Let me ask the ultimate patient question. You send a

(05:28):
text question to someone, how long is it before you
become I rate that they haven't returned the text? Oh
it depends on who the person is, because some people
I know don't have their phones on them all the time,
so they take a little bit longer other people. I
know you have your phone, You're just being a jerk
right now. See, I'm usually I don't care if you

(05:48):
don't answer me the night time. I'm like, okay, then
you'll answer me. I'm with you. That's the thing I
have you. You have to learn that texting is not
a live conversations already comes to you. If I know
that you have your phone on you and I know
that we're still in office mode, I expect you to
answer my text. I've gotten repeated text from you. Hello, Hello,

(06:11):
where are you are we going to lunch? No? Okay?
Thanks by being passive aggressive aggressive, But in this room,
who's the worst person with getting back to people? No? No,
no, no no, there's different. Nate is late in getting text
back to you. I never text back. Nate is the worst. No,

(06:34):
Nate is the worst. And he forgets that he's the
senior senior executive producer And we need for you to
be timely with things, but you just don't care. And
obviously this is going to be your demise Danielle's not
the best either. I'll be honest with you. Always gets
back to me. There are times I will I will
text Nate in the middle of the show, like hey man,
he'll let me know what we're doing, like next break,
and it'll just go like four breaks before I hear anything.

(06:56):
I'm like, dude, look at your phone. Don't need you
for four breaks, you need me, Okay. So here's my thought.
Just hear me out on this. And I'm and look,
I'm an offender worse than anyone as far as a
lack of patients goes. I have no patience whatsoever. So
my thought is this, let's all try to be a
little more patient. I mean, unless we're you know, in
a situation where we're in a hurry, we have a deadline,

(07:18):
it has to be done, or it's you know, it's death, dooming, destruction.
Unless we get it done, let's just learn to calm down.
I'm gonna do my best. You know. The problem with
doing a live show, unlike this one, a live show,
is we have a clock that we can't pause. So
when I get impatient in the morning, that's me. I
have to I have to be the one that moves

(07:39):
us forward, and if if stuff doesn't get done, I
become a total bitch. That's what makes us great though,
Thank you. Another example. Sorry about that. I'm impatient at
the buffet line, especially in different stations. Okay, I don't
want to wait behind you for salad, so I'm gonna
skip you and move on to the carving board. Is

(08:00):
that okay? I think that, I think, but I'm patient.
I'm not waiting you're not going to have the salad
that What you're saying is, what you're saying is there
are some people out there that field. They go to
the first station at the buffet, which is the salad,
and then they then own everything ahead of them. And

(08:20):
what you're saying is people think that right, right, But
you should say something to them. You should say, hey,
I'm not going to have salad, so do you mind?
And then usually they say anything that It's just nice,
just be polite. No, they should understand the rules of
the buffet. We have just decided. Here, you go where
you need to go. If you need to go right
to the chocolate pudding, you go right now. I want
to trip your ass next time you go on a

(08:42):
chocolate pudding. Who you fell on the sad Sorry, alight,
I have one that happened on vacation. You guys can
give me your opinion, please patience, Yes, the patients thing.
So we did a four by four tour through the
cliffs of Corfu. So everybody was driving a jeep. So
the woman in front of us did not know how
to drive a stick shift. It was a stick She
kept stalling, pausing, rolling backward on the hill. So we

(09:05):
passed her because I thought, I don't want her to
roll back and hit the car. This is a little
bit annoying. We're perfectly fine. She was. I rate her
press of the tour. She wouldn't drop it. There isn't
a patient driver. These people are on pacient drivers. Behind me,
I'm like, woll then you don't know how to drive
this car. It's kind of making me nervous. It's a
problem that that she has to deal with. Glad you
say that. God, let's talk about people and their problem

(09:25):
that they need to deal with, Like, don't drive a
stick if you don't know how to drive a stick
We don't get mad at people if if you know,
if they pass you right and you're we're following each other,
in a caravan and then we're getting so far away
from everybody. We were like, we gotta go around this lady.
She was so mad, you know, and scary was on
a TV s in Costa Rica, and I'm sure you
pissed people off because you have no you have no
business being on a TV. The guy the guide said,

(09:48):
who is the slowest person with the with the least experience,
and I raised my hands. So they said, well then
you have to be first in line behind me. The
slowest person goes first, so you don't lose everybody. And
then all my friends were going, see that's too much pressure.
I couldn't do that. I wouldn't I would never go first.
I don't just don't tell them. Don't tell him saying

(10:10):
you have done this fifty times, you know telor Swift.
She says, you gotta calm down. Maybe you should listen
to that song you gotta calm down? All right, thank you,
thank you both. So anyway, so back to back to
the need to relax, back to the need to calm down,

(10:30):
because at the end of the day, let's say you
drive seventy five to work versus legal speed limit. If
that's what it is, you may get there a little sooner,
but is it really that much sooner to make yourself
so stressed? Yeah? Usually it's not. I don't think it
is right. It's not worth it at when I'm late.
At that point, I go, I'm already late. What are

(10:52):
we gonna do about this? Whatever? I saw a meme
the other day that said, hey, if you're late for work,
slow down, be late her exactly what are they gonna do?
Fire you? If they fire you, great, they didn't want
you there anyway. You can take your time finding a
new job. Hey, so uh okay. So we have our
friend Wax who works down at the Breakfast club on

(11:14):
Power with Charlemagne and and d J Envy and Angela. Anyway,
so we all chipped some of us chipped in to
buy him a birthday gift, a really nice gift, right, Yeah,
it's like TV. Yeah. He really has been wanting this
and he couldn't afford it, and so he had mentioned
it to someone and they put together like a little

(11:35):
go fund me for everyone in the building and everyone
was contributing to it. And we love Wax, yeah, we
love even the Wax doesn't work with us directly. He's
just He's just a great influence for all of us
here at I Heeart in New York. So some of
us chipped in, and we're invited to the you chipped
in party, and some of us didn't chip him, so
great to you chipped in. I did because Wax is

(11:55):
three times from my side. So Daniel chipped in and
I chipped in, and I think we're the only three
on the show that chipped in, and Garrett is right,
so okay, so we chipped in. We were invited to
have a little cake, a little birthday cake, and you
should have seen the people walking by and they almost
walked in to get some cake, and the looks were like,

(12:16):
don't you dare, Yeah, you can't do that. Nope. No.
We've actually got a text from a listener saying that
they have pot luck days where people bring dishes to work.
If you don't bring a dish, you don't get to
eat lunch with every buy a sandwich of the Delhi,
don't don't show up with broke cabits trying to have
all the fun. That's right, you know, but there's something
weird to me about an office space where you would

(12:37):
hope that everyone feels equal and all good, But those
are the situations where you're not allowed, not allowed to
feel you don't have the decency to bring in something,
even if it's like a sleeve of cookies that you
bought at the store. Go buy a bag of tate somewhere. Really,
then you ain't got nothing. I'm with you, Daniel. You

(12:57):
were so bronx right now about her housewarming party back
in the day. But you so, we had a housewarming
party back in the day, and like you know, we
didn't expect gifts, but some people brought them, but at
least the bottle of wine or a card that said congratulations.
This one person brought nothing, stayed after everyone left and
took home doggie bags. Is not like that stopped them.

(13:28):
He takes doggie bags, but the other party is all right,
So yeah, it's one thing it looked. I was always
taught never show up empty handed, but sometimes you're crunch
for time and you don't have time. I'm always the
first to say, hey, I never want to show up
empty hand, empty handed, but today I'm empty handed. I
owe you a gift, but have something. But yeah, it's
like it's when you open the door. If I open

(13:48):
the door and you're coming to my house, you need
to have something for me. We we didn't when we
came to here. Were all stressed out about it. Oh no,
that was different when I had my branch at the house. No, no, no,
no's we were very stressed before the record. I did
suggest we should bring something, didn't everything. I'm serious. I'm

(14:10):
at a point now in my life where I really
don't want you to bring anything. Well, even that we
were thinking about that for your wedding because you asked
for a donation to a charity, which is a crazing
and we were like, well, shouldn't we do something? But
I do not know. We're just gonna put the money
toward the charity. Our wedding planner, Mikey, he called the
other day. He says, I have a list of people
who are insisting on giving you something for your wedding.
I'm like no, I said absolutely, and tell them please no.

(14:32):
If they bring something, I will throw it in the
trash can. Okay, So I got something. It's just a
very tiny it's nothing like big. But it was a
long time ago before you said this, don't do that,
and I got the confirmation. Now you're making it you're
trying to make everyone else on the show look like
I know that's what he said, but I didn't. I didn't.
It was before I had all this information. And don't
get me anything. I'm gonna throw it away. Don't all

(14:54):
we don't need anything. Please don't bring anything. Thank you.
Fifteen minute Morning