September 23, 2024 • 6 mins
Gandhi's feelings are hurt after her friend called her a gaslighter.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Today's Daily Highlight from Elvis Duran in the morning show.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
I got a little note from Gandhi because everyone's wile
to just kind of checking to see how she's doing
and how you're doing, Danielle, and may I read this?
It's kind of personal. May I read this out loud?
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Sure?
Speaker 2 (00:14):
What you wrote? Yeah, Elvis? I think my stars are
out of alignment with the Within the past couple of weeks,
people have been saying the craziest things to me about
my character, my lifestyle, just a whole bunch of big
feelings and they're all crappy. People have been lying to
my face about some stuff, and I'm reaching my limit.
(00:35):
Usually I just let people vent and say what they
want to, but I've argued back a little and I
got then I got called a gas.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Lighter on numerous occasions.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Oh geezh, I hate that term gaslighting. I think we're
done with that.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
I think it's the worst.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Do you want to talk about this? I mean, is
it just everyone in Unison is just beating the crap
out of you?
Speaker 1 (00:53):
So no, I won't say everyone in Unison because I
think that's dramatic. It feels like that. It is not
like that. Just a handful of people who I thought
or still think are fairly close to me, who just
have some crap to say. And I'm like, I was
very caught off guard by it. But you can't argue
people out of their feelings. So if somebody feels that way,
you gotta let them feel that way and listen to
(01:14):
what they have to say. But then there were some
accusations along the way of things that I just hardcore
disagree with, or the statement of the way something happened
and it did not happen like that. And when you
say it does not happen, you could call it a gaslighter.
I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, huh. I'm not gaslighting
you by saying that is not what happened. If that's
actually not what happened, right, you are gaslighting me if
(01:37):
you tell me that stating facts is not true, right,
step it just listen. It's been crazy, and I do
I not go lie. My feelings have been hurt and
I'm not used to my.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
Feelings getting well.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Look, you know, we all agree that you are the
most caring, giving person in our family, and you're lovely
and you don't deserve that. And if someone wants to
have a conversation as you're air quotes, friend, then please
do so, but do it in a respectful manner. Yes,
and excuse me, and be open to what you have
to say about what they're saying about you. Yes, it's
so easy to throw someone up on the cross and
(02:13):
crucify them without really thinking about what you're saying and
what you're doing. And you know that's that's not cool.
And I'm hoping, I'm hoping it's no one within this
close circle here.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
No, it's people you guys don't even know. But I've
been thinking about.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Well, I will tell you something from the oldest guy
in the room. This is where you start understanding why
you shed yourself in your life. You shed the people
that are dead skin. There are people that you thought
at one time they meant something to you, and maybe
they did. But when they start talking to you like
(02:49):
that and they don't leave open a hole for the
possibility that they're wrong what they're saying to you, and
they accuse you of gas lighting, okay, gas lighting, goodbye.
If they back you into a corner where you know,
sometimes you do need to defend yourself, you're saying a
second ago, gandhi, I just let them vent and let
it go. Well, no, you know what, you you owe
(03:09):
it to yourself to defend yourself just as we would
defend you. Well, thank Daniel. Do you agree what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
One hundred percent?
Speaker 2 (03:16):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (03:17):
You know me, I'm not keep my mouth shuts me
with something, I'm gonna go back.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
So that's my first instinct. My first instinct is to
come out swinging like what are you talking about? Oh,
you want to fight, let's fight. But then I'm trying
to be more mature and more of an adult about
things and just let people say the things that they feel,
air it out, sit with it for a moment before
I just, you know, blindly swing back. But then when
I sit with it, I'm like still, no, no, I
(03:41):
still don't agree with you. Yeah, I've thought about this,
and I think everything that you said was a pile
of poppycock. And we can fight about this, but I don't.
I just I don't want to argue with people. I'm like, oh,
if that's how you feel about me, well okay.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
You know arguing. Arguing can be different, different shades of arguing, right,
I mean, there's the defending yourself respectfully, or the is
like shut up, really, get f out of here? Even
know what I know, it's it's a stupid meme you
see all the time on Instagram. But when someone says
something that offends you, it's always good to be as
(04:12):
silent as you can. M just like that. Hear that, yes,
And then you can look at me in the eye
and say, can you repeat what you just said to me?
And then have them repeat what they just said, and
sometimes that will make them go, oh god, okay, maybe
what I'm saying is stupid, And sometimes it doesn't, you know,
(04:35):
I don't know, but sometimes silence is the most deafening defense.
Speaker 3 (04:40):
And then you just walk away, just turn and walk away,
and they're left there going.
Speaker 4 (04:43):
But I had somebody, you remember, somebody used to work
for us. That's something to me one time and I said,
wait a second, I'm not sure I heard that properly.
Can you just run that by me one more time?
It runs one more time, I want to make sure
I heard it. And they said it again and it
was exactly what I thought they said. And I said, okay, cool,
(05:05):
I'll get back to you right and.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
Then ask them, hey, did you hear what you just said.
But then at that point, you know, it's it's a
back and forth thing, and maybe you don't want to
get into them.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
I don't know, And I think I've really been trying
to pay attention to this too lately. Never take advice
or criticism from somebody who is not doing something with
their life that you would want to do. Yeah. So
if there's an idiot telling me that I'm an idiot,
do I care if I don't want to follow in
their footsteps of anything that they're doing. No, But sometimes
(05:34):
it stills things exactly.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Yeah, And that's that's friendship, and it's the disappointment. I mean,
you know what my dad always used to tell me,
You've got to lower your expectation of people. Sometimes I'm like, well,
I don't want to only that. Only surround yourself. Only
surround yourself with those few people who deserve you as
a friend.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
And then you know, I may sit here and tell
you your hair is red, and you you know for
a fact your hair isn't red. I see red, and
so I'm going to tell you what I see, whether
it's right or wrong, and it's it's it's good. It's
good to know when you got to like, let people go. Yeah,
and it's okay.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
I saw somebody posted this weekend, become more aware of
what's really worth your energy, and I kept it and
I keep going back to look at it. And it's
true that with everything, not just with you know, you
know stuff in general, but with people also.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
No, totally, I completely agree. And I will say having
my feelings hurt was a new phenomenon that I haven't
felt in a very long time.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
So I was like, ew, it's good. Your feelings are
hurt for a reason, so listen to your listen to
your heart. You're you, You are hurting for a reason.
That reason is your answer.
Today's Daily Highlight from Elvis Duran in the morning show.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
I got a little note from Gandhi because everyone's wile
to just kind of checking to see how she's doing
and how you're doing, Danielle, and may I read this?
It's kind of personal. May I read this out loud?
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Sure?
Speaker 2 (00:14):
What you wrote? Yeah, Elvis? I think my stars are
out of alignment with the Within the past couple of weeks,
people have been saying the craziest things to me about
my character, my lifestyle, just a whole bunch of big
feelings and they're all crappy. People have been lying to
my face about some stuff, and I'm reaching my limit.
(00:35):
Usually I just let people vent and say what they
want to, but I've argued back a little and I
got then I got called a gas.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Lighter on numerous occasions.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Oh geezh, I hate that term gaslighting. I think we're
done with that.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
I think it's the worst.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Do you want to talk about this? I mean, is
it just everyone in Unison is just beating the crap
out of you?
Speaker 1 (00:53):
So no, I won't say everyone in Unison because I
think that's dramatic. It feels like that. It is not
like that. Just a handful of people who I thought
or still think are fairly close to me, who just
have some crap to say. And I'm like, I was
very caught off guard by it. But you can't argue
people out of their feelings. So if somebody feels that way,
you gotta let them feel that way and listen to
(01:14):
what they have to say. But then there were some
accusations along the way of things that I just hardcore
disagree with, or the statement of the way something happened
and it did not happen like that. And when you
say it does not happen, you could call it a gaslighter.
I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, huh. I'm not gaslighting
you by saying that is not what happened. If that's
actually not what happened, right, you are gaslighting me if
(01:37):
you tell me that stating facts is not true, right,
step it just listen. It's been crazy, and I do
I not go lie. My feelings have been hurt and
I'm not used to my.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
Feelings getting well.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Look, you know, we all agree that you are the
most caring, giving person in our family, and you're lovely
and you don't deserve that. And if someone wants to
have a conversation as you're air quotes, friend, then please
do so, but do it in a respectful manner. Yes,
and excuse me, and be open to what you have
to say about what they're saying about you. Yes, it's
so easy to throw someone up on the cross and
(02:13):
crucify them without really thinking about what you're saying and
what you're doing. And you know that's that's not cool.
And I'm hoping, I'm hoping it's no one within this
close circle here.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
No, it's people you guys don't even know. But I've
been thinking about.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Well, I will tell you something from the oldest guy
in the room. This is where you start understanding why
you shed yourself in your life. You shed the people
that are dead skin. There are people that you thought
at one time they meant something to you, and maybe
they did. But when they start talking to you like
(02:49):
that and they don't leave open a hole for the
possibility that they're wrong what they're saying to you, and
they accuse you of gas lighting, okay, gas lighting, goodbye.
If they back you into a corner where you know,
sometimes you do need to defend yourself, you're saying a
second ago, gandhi, I just let them vent and let
it go. Well, no, you know what, you you owe
(03:09):
it to yourself to defend yourself just as we would
defend you. Well, thank Daniel. Do you agree what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
One hundred percent?
Speaker 2 (03:16):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (03:17):
You know me, I'm not keep my mouth shuts me
with something, I'm gonna go back.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
So that's my first instinct. My first instinct is to
come out swinging like what are you talking about? Oh,
you want to fight, let's fight. But then I'm trying
to be more mature and more of an adult about
things and just let people say the things that they feel,
air it out, sit with it for a moment before
I just, you know, blindly swing back. But then when
I sit with it, I'm like still, no, no, I
(03:41):
still don't agree with you. Yeah, I've thought about this,
and I think everything that you said was a pile
of poppycock. And we can fight about this, but I don't.
I just I don't want to argue with people. I'm like, oh,
if that's how you feel about me, well okay.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
You know arguing. Arguing can be different, different shades of arguing, right,
I mean, there's the defending yourself respectfully, or the is
like shut up, really, get f out of here? Even
know what I know, it's it's a stupid meme you
see all the time on Instagram. But when someone says
something that offends you, it's always good to be as
(04:12):
silent as you can. M just like that. Hear that, yes,
And then you can look at me in the eye
and say, can you repeat what you just said to me?
And then have them repeat what they just said, and
sometimes that will make them go, oh god, okay, maybe
what I'm saying is stupid, And sometimes it doesn't, you know,
(04:35):
I don't know, but sometimes silence is the most deafening defense.
Speaker 3 (04:40):
And then you just walk away, just turn and walk away,
and they're left there going.
Speaker 4 (04:43):
But I had somebody, you remember, somebody used to work
for us. That's something to me one time and I said,
wait a second, I'm not sure I heard that properly.
Can you just run that by me one more time?
It runs one more time, I want to make sure
I heard it. And they said it again and it
was exactly what I thought they said. And I said, okay, cool,
(05:05):
I'll get back to you right and.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
Then ask them, hey, did you hear what you just said.
But then at that point, you know, it's it's a
back and forth thing, and maybe you don't want to
get into them.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
I don't know, And I think I've really been trying
to pay attention to this too lately. Never take advice
or criticism from somebody who is not doing something with
their life that you would want to do. Yeah. So
if there's an idiot telling me that I'm an idiot,
do I care if I don't want to follow in
their footsteps of anything that they're doing. No, But sometimes
(05:34):
it stills things exactly.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Yeah, And that's that's friendship, and it's the disappointment. I mean,
you know what my dad always used to tell me,
You've got to lower your expectation of people. Sometimes I'm like, well,
I don't want to only that. Only surround yourself. Only
surround yourself with those few people who deserve you as
a friend.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
And then you know, I may sit here and tell
you your hair is red, and you you know for
a fact your hair isn't red. I see red, and
so I'm going to tell you what I see, whether
it's right or wrong, and it's it's it's good. It's
good to know when you got to like, let people go. Yeah,
and it's okay.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
I saw somebody posted this weekend, become more aware of
what's really worth your energy, and I kept it and
I keep going back to look at it. And it's
true that with everything, not just with you know, you
know stuff in general, but with people also.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
No, totally, I completely agree. And I will say having
my feelings hurt was a new phenomenon that I haven't
felt in a very long time.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
So I was like, ew, it's good. Your feelings are
hurt for a reason, so listen to your listen to
your heart. You're you, You are hurting for a reason.
That reason is your answer.
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