Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
first show here it is a fifteen minute morning show podcast.
We're all here. There's Froggy and there's a straight Nate,
(00:24):
newly married straight Nate. We're gonna fight out when he
gets tired of that in a few minutes. And also
we've got the One and Only Gandhi and Scary Hello,
and there's Danielle and Scotty b Garrett and of course
Brody's in the den. And of course I say, we're
gonna wait to see when Nate's tired of marriage. We
should ask his wife Heather first. Her tim is gonna
run on you. Before we got married at three o'clock
(00:47):
on Saturday, I probably run three oh five, I would guess. Well,
the question is do you feel different after you're married? Yeah,
you know, as I said this morning, it was kind
of some relief because I think there's all these huge,
massive clouds of uncertainty going into something like this, and
it is, I guess, probably the biggest commitment other than
(01:09):
having a child, that you can really get into. And
so I was really nervous. I had a bit of
a freak out last week. Did I did I? Did
I go how do we know this is gonna work?
What happens if it doesn't work out? Like you don't know?
You know, you just march down that aisle or whatever,
just with hopes for all good things, you know. But
(01:29):
but Elvis, what did you feel like the day after
you got married? Was there any difference? Was there any
different feeling? Just very hungover? Yeah? Yeah, you know what.
I was calm, you know, because you know, whether you
have a small, little easy wedding or you have a difficult,
crazy wedding. The ceremony itself, you know, then you're with
(01:51):
friends and family, and then you're real and then you
finally get to go home and go to bed, and
you wake up the next day and it's it is
a whole new world. And didn't you feel that the
next day? I did? I did. I think I'll feel
it even more now that everybody's out of our house,
because honestly, we got married on Saturday. We didn't do
it on Saturday night. You do do it it as
(02:14):
a married couple. You didn't do the sex. I think
that is a lot of people are like that, because
I don't think we did it either after our wedding,
because you're exhausted that I got home and was piste
off because the photographer had messed up everything in my
living room or whatever, so I had to fix that.
We were getting ready to leave for the honeymoon the
(02:34):
next day. There was a lot of stuff going on,
so I don't think we did either. I've been married
twenty years on Wednesday. We still don't do it. He's
still waiting, he still wait. My apologies for my howling dog, Alex.
We're talking about getting married. You want to join us?
Can you get those howling creatures out of here? Those
(02:55):
meddling kids creatures? How long did it take you guys
to get adjusted to saying my husband and my wife?
Because I feel like that would be the biggest change.
It's still an adjustment for me, and I'm like three
years in, okay, Well, it's just it's an adjustment. I'm
not Yeah, it's okay. There's nothing wrong with that, though, yeah,
there's some there was some novelty, like we woke up
on Sunday morning and she's like hello my husband. I'm
(03:18):
like hello my wife, and then you kind of forget,
like say says, uh, where are you getting this? My fiance?
My wife? You know, It's crazy though. I feel like
when you when you're introducing her now you're like, this
is my wife, Like at first, like, what, Yeah, I
have a wife. It's a it's a very heavy sounding word,
(03:38):
and I imagine that husbands a very heavy word to
to say, and I hate the word ever referred to
me as that. So another thing, now that you're married
to Heather, she I think illegally, she doesn't have to
uh turn you in from her correct? Correct? Yeah, she
can't be forced to testify against me. Not that I'm
(04:01):
like doing research. I just happened to know that. So
what I wanted to know what you know about the
manner in which you guys got married? You know, it
was just like this quiet thing and see you later.
Because Greg t he made a dick of a text
to us. He to me, and I'm just gonna read
it because I don't care. He said, Hey, tell Nate.
(04:22):
I said, congratulations. I'm so glad he got married the
way he did. Who the hell really wants to go
to anyone's wedding anyway, Seriously, I would thank him for that,
not that I would really be invited anyway. At this point,
I'm just saying I really wants to go to anyone's wedding.
Like a stream of every thought came out. I hate
to say say this, but I so agree with and
that's why I didn't want. I'm like, you know, I'm okay.
(04:44):
There's a lot of reasons I didn't want to have
a wedding a forty two be I don't know. I
just I'm with her. I'm not gonna. I don't see
a point. However, in hindsight, I'm glad I did it
with my family. I saw some family I haven't seen forever.
But like as far as friends going like co works,
I didn't want to drag you guys out on a Saturday,
especially during your vacation. Let me get during vacation, thank you,
I know. But for my wedding I had to pay
(05:06):
for you guys to go. Well, that was the exception.
That was like a part of that was gonna show up.
I pay for it. Plus, there was no way I
could even come close to comparing to yours. I mean,
yours was the Rolls Roy's Disney World of weddings. You
don't you don't compare. If you would have shown up
to mine, it would like a hot dog cart on
(05:28):
the side of the road. That's not true. He would
have had a bootleg. That's not true. Alright, we're moving on.
But congratulations, we love you. We love you. Yes, Dave Brodie,
I was gonna come to you make sea. What's on
your mind? I was in Connecticut on Saturday. In fact,
I drove right by Nate's town. I would have stopped
over for some free food. You wouldn't have to worry about, Okay,
(05:50):
I will. I will tell you at a later date.
I did have chicken parm in my pockets on Friday night.
Palm pockets returned. Did you went to Carmines. That means yes,
I did. Palm kids. Da is the only guy we
know who could actually put leftovers in his pockets. Very
Napoleon dynamite of view. He went on a pizza tour
over vacation. I'm jealous. Yeah, you went to New Haven?
(06:10):
Did you get some clam pie? If you know what
I'm saying, I did get some clam pie. I had
pizza from three different places, and I went to a
burger place that Scary recommended, Louis Lunch, where they claim
they invented the hamburger. They still have the grittle. The
grittle irons there vertical like toasters from the eighteen hundreds.
Very old, very old, Louise lunch. It was a good trip.
The pizza was good. Oh, here we go, not New York.
(06:34):
It's good though it's different. It's good. Yeah, all right.
It sounds like you had a great time, though I
had a great time I had. I'm glad you hit
the road. I did. I got, I got on the road.
I drove around trip and one day it wasn't that bad,
and I just went from pizza place to pizza place.
Although I thought I could order like every twenty minutes,
one place had a three hour wait on an ordering,
(06:55):
so I had to go to other places and then
just sit in the car eating pizza two and a
half hours waiting for the third one. So wow, that's dedication.
That's dedication. I did it. I hope you can rebuild. Hey, Froggy,
do we have our dad joke of the day? Yes?
Are you ready ready for Nate? Since he's our dead Nate.
(07:15):
Why did the scarecrow win an award? I don't know why,
because he was outstanding in his field. Oh my god,
I love the simple humor of a good dad joke. Wait,
tell us tell everyone listening to the podcast your latest
(07:38):
dirty dad joke. Oh you're ready for this? So hey,
did you guys know my penis uh is in or
it was in the Guinness Book of World Records. It
was yeah, yeah, until the librarian told me to take
it out. Stupid as funny. I heard it was a
(08:02):
soft cover though. God, I'll go back to my pizza, Nate.
Have people already started harassing you guys about what are
you going to have kids? I got a little bit
of that, his wife, are we do this podcast? We're done? Right? Frog?
Can I ask if you want kids? I mean, you know,
(08:24):
we've talked about it. I think we're gonna freeze some embryos.
And and just because she's not a hundred percent sure,
I know I'm certainly not a hund percent su but yeah,
we're going to freeze them because if you do the
research on it, as women get older, and you guys
know this, it becomes harder to conceive. And look, you know,
it's none of our business. And exactly, I have no
(08:46):
idea what your conversations have been. It's none of our business.
But all the best to you, with or without children.
You always have us. I'll be your big bat kid.
You're my big daddy. You can't be my kid too, dude.
I was like fertile myrtle. When I was having kids.
It was like, Sheldon, stay over there, because I'll get
pregnant if you breathe on me. That's really what it
was like. My mother said, I took after my great
(09:07):
grandmother pregnant. Yeah, she said Grandpa would put his pants
on the wrong way and she'd be pregnant or something
like that. Some stupid thing. But I know a lot
of people, a lot of grand I. Over the break,
I saw my best friend who just had a baby,
(09:29):
so I got to see her baby, and it was
crazy seeing her with kids. But I posted a picture
of me holding the baby, and it was just a
NonStop barrage. When are you Brandon having kids? Like, oh,
dear God. First of all, I don't even want to
get married. That's the commitment that I'm not trying to
do a kid even bigger no kids, thank you. But
how many people feel like they should say that to you?
(09:50):
You should totally have kids. I'll be cute. No, it's
much more than being cute. It's like a lot of work. Yeah,
you're having kids for their enjoyment. No not, I gret
the look out and then give back to you, and
then they go to college and break your heart. I
have a year and a half left, but I'm still
counting down to go so fast. Just letting you all know.
(10:13):
I'm letting you all know ahead of time. I'm going
to be a fucking disaster. I'm going to be a mess.
You're gonna have to sweep me up off the floor,
and I'm gonna need a lot of hugs. You think
you're going aready, I'll tell you you have to be proud,
because you you are. You've done your part. You have
raised gentlemen who will be able to go into the
world and make the world a better place. And for that,
(10:34):
you've done a very good job. Some parents don't raise
good children, and they're afraid to let them go because
they know that they can't find for themselves. So you've
done a really good job. You're still young. You should
go up into the hills and squat another one out
anything else Patty from working today and go up there
and just have another time. Infernal myrtle, I probably should.
(10:59):
That's scary that what else anyone last week. A trick
last week that I've never seen before. We'll go to you, Garrett,
after the Newbachi trick, I mean to interrupt, what is it?
Tell us? It was amazing. He put the big bowl
of white rice on the grill and then cut it right,
(11:21):
a little triangle out and he made it a pac
man and it was eating everything else on the grill.
I had never saw that before. They finally put a
new one out. There was that after the onion tower ablaze?
Or was that before that? After? Was that after he
(11:41):
catapulted the shrimp tail into his hat, threw the squash
into your mouth. You know they don't throw stuff in
your mouth anymore COVID. Alright, So Garrett, what's going on
with you today? Vacation was weird because all my friends
are working, like I was the only one off, so
(12:01):
it was like, so, what's everybody doing today? Working? All right? Uh?
I got I got drunk with some good friends I
haven't seen in a very long time over the weekend
and we took my kids laser tag and we played
laser tag in our house at like twelve o'clock at night.
So that was a lot of fun. You didn't like
crash anything, not that I know of, but it was.
(12:21):
But being drunk and playing laser tag is is another
level of fun. But yeah, dropping my kids off at school,
like having parents look at me like I'm the babysitter
because they don't know who I am because I don't
drop my kids off at school. That was fun. Oh yeah,
that's right. That's always the way. You're like, oh, you're
the you're the kids new sitter. I'm like, no, I'm
I'm the dad. The thing to consider if you're having children,
(12:42):
they'll think you're a kidnapper. There's that, all right? Well,
how we did on time? They're froggy done. You can
be done whenever you want. I was, Oh, I love that. Well,
thank you again for sending in all the tofu tips Today,
I'm still getting recipes to the text messages. What's from
the toff? I've tried it ultiple ways. I just can't
(13:02):
do it. What does your taste like? If you have
to discuss it taste? Does it taste like anything? It
tastes like whatever you make it taste, yea white go
globules or something. You do it right? You know, you
know what? Many cultures depend on tofu for their protein,
and you know it's it's great things, So let's not
How can I talk about something you're eating someone else
goes I'm trying it. It's like it's like the tof
(13:27):
It's like the green vomit emoji, like, don't do that, okay,
I won't you What if you what if you ask me? Now?
What if you're saying, hey, I'm going to try this stuff,
have you had it before? Then then can I be honest?
I didn't ask you, but I'm saying if you do,
then am I allowed to go when? If you're at yeah?
But if she says, hey, I had meat loaf last
(13:47):
night for dinner, it was so good, all you have
to say is I didn't like it. You don't. You
don't say anything, you don't. You don't have to say
that's gross. I will say so funny. Served me foody
cream cheese once and I didn't know the difference until
after I ate it to mind over matter. There a
(14:08):
soup that has to love. I love me so soup,
but I don't need that. I'm gonna yuck your yum.
Would you have for dinner last night? Froggy? Uh no, no, no, no,
I didn't. I had chicken wings in the ear fryer
(14:42):
dinner last night. Water. Oh gosh, it's such assholes. Gandhi
is not wanting to have part of part of any
of this. No, I'm all about it. I told you guys.
I've just been so used to this my whole life because,
like anything, I ate that Indian. Everybody barfed about it,
so I never barf about other people's food unless you
(15:03):
put cinnamon in it. Then that's just for me. I
hate it, but a little should try the Gandhi tuna
tar taco at Green Goes in Jersey. I don't like
carn in there. Instead. It's not the Gandhi. It's not
my taco first time. What does that mean, Froggy, you
(15:29):
know exactly what it be. This is where the fifteen
minute Morning Show