September 24, 2024 • 47 mins
The moms have a fresh new set! To honor the occasion Steve sparred no expense. See the family heirloom that will forever grace the studio set. On this episode Steve reflects on the completion of Joe’s first national stand up tour and shares how his kids can make him laugh out loud. Plus, what caused Joe to sing ‘My Girl’ in the streets of Manhattan?
Listener questions this week range from a deep family dilemma to a honest look at honesty. The moms tackle the burning question of if the Cool Aid Man is the jar or the juice and also how to calm a loved one’s nerves if working away from home. All on this brand new episode of Two Cool Moms!
See Joe on Tour - www.joegattoofficial.com
See Steve on Tour - https://punchup.live/steve-byrne
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
There was a problem.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
We're taking mud.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
We have done it. We've resumed Two Cool Moms.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
I am Joe Gatto, I am Steve Burn and two
Cool Moms is back.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
We are back, baby.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Hello, how are you? I'll see you.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
It's great to be back in the co pilot chair
with you.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
This is fantastic. Yeah, it's been too long.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Look at the ambiance. Where are we, Joseph.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
This is so beautiful. This is Look. You've got this.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
We've got this. We got here, we got a little
of that.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
This guy's here. These weren't arms. We borrowed these from
somebody that.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Oh you know, you told me, hey, Steve, bring some
things from yes, to decorate the set, bring something significant,
something from home. I toiled with this.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
Oh I did.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
I spent quite a bit of time.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Okay, oh, a fancy for to take a look. Okay,
let's see.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
Let's see now that this is authentic, Yeah, authentic.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Yeah, that's been a fairly family heirloom. Can you take
the tag off? We've had the fair that's a family heirloom.
We've had that in the family guards. Yeah. So my
mom got that when she first came to the States,
obviously years ago.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
Did you want to keep the tag for it then, just.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
In case, I'll return it. Yeah, and we're just like
you know, whatever they see where these go?
Speaker 3 (01:24):
You know? Oh and this was you told me your
grandma that brought this over.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Absolutely, that's what she came over from. That's authentic.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
The price tag. She even get the price tag on it.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Yep.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
I can't believe you paid twallet for this jail.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Keep the receipt please, thank you. And that that's also
here on set.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
Good good, You really dove into the duck theme.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
Now.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Look, I didn't just go in the store and go
to one section. I went through the whole I went
through the whole store. So there we go.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Okay, and yeah, I got some tick tacks. Yes, in
case you want to stay fresh.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Oh, and that's we're kicking it off.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
There's no receipt. Okay, it's no receipt.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
God damn it. I just want to keep it minty.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Fresh, a MINTI fresh set look good, bring a.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
Good vibe and energy to the room. By the way,
feel free to dig in.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
I uh, I asked you to do one thing.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
You don't.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
You don't schedule it, you don't edit it, you don't
even open the emails.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
I ask you.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Excuse me, I'm speaking.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
I ask you, and I toiled with asking you to
be like, hey, you know what's gonna be a fun set?
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Brings some stuff? Got ya?
Speaker 1 (02:38):
That's what I can open the text. Got ya, that's
what you said. Okay, got ya. So you went We're
in Times Square, obviously, and you went to the Times
Square duck hut.
Speaker 3 (02:49):
I guess the New York duck cut. I'm assuming you
spend forty seven dollars. Uh.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
By the way, not far off forty five really, And
when he was ringing up, I was like, motherfucking But
at the same time, I was thinking, well, this will
be fun.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
For this would be great. It's worth a joke. You
didn't want to did you forget to bring something? Yes?
That was right, right? So okay that's what it was.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Yeah, because I think gotcha. I'm not sure if you know,
but okay. So the night before I flew here, I
was doing my show at Zany's. Yeah, and it's a
CrowdWork show. So I do the series Steve Byrne versus
New York or Nashville, right, Villa will punch up bluff,
it doesn't matter, And so doing the show, and these
(03:32):
guys read Clinch Red Clay Strays. Their tour manager reached
out and said, hey, they're gonna come down. And they're
a phenomenal band, phenomenal country like just root, classic roots,
no production, huge production, just like bass, guitar, drums, vocals.
These guys are amazing. So they come and I'm like excited.
I'm like, oh, it's pretty cool. They're going to spend
(03:55):
their off day coming to see me. This is very flattering.
And then before I got there, and mind you, I
haven't had a drink in a month. I've been keeping
it nice and clean. I'm not vegan, but I've been
keeping it nice and clean and keep it in check.
And then I get a call from Joe DeRosa who's
on a tour bus with Bert Kreischer, and they say
(04:16):
we're coming in tonight, be ready, and be ready means hydrate.
So anytime Bert's around, it just goes off the rail.
So the night just kept happening. Surprise a surprise, I
do my thing. Chris Kirkpatrick from en Sync is there.
I bring him up with Bert or he just came.
He came in and we met at a Steeler's function
(04:37):
well from Pittsburgh.
Speaker 3 (04:38):
Greg. He comes down.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
We sing a country song together on stage, which is hilarious.
It was a lot of fun. And then I do
my set. Chris Kirkpatrick came up for sausage party, and
then I go over the door. I'm like, you guys
want to surprise tonight. I open up the door, I
go des DeRosa comes out, DeRosa introduces Kreischer. Then Kreischer
in use is Nate Barghetsi and now all of us
(05:02):
are on stage together. And the night just took right off.
So we had multiple drinks that evening. I got as
I'm coming home, my flight got bump back, which I
told and then I was like, all right, I'm just
gonna I was gonna pack when I got home. I'll
just pack in the morning. So there's a long story.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
Hence the ducks. Hence the ducks. So the ducks names
of Bert, Joe, and Nate. Yes, that's right.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Yeah, that's the title of this episode. Hence the ducks
hens the ducks. Yeah, So I apologize about that because
you did tell me. And I set aside things in
my office to put my suitcase to bring to decorate.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
I can't wait till next time when you bring everything
or have the excuse story to tell me why you
didn't bring them, because that's likely what's gonna happen.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
But I'm excited about it.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
I actually got the direct Chris Kirkpatrick in a little
short film written by Brian Q quinn and Savakanda Cold
Pinky Poketo Bendido is Dead.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
And I did it in two thousand and four.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Really yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
I flew in because they their director fell off and
they needed somebody. They had everything lined up in the
head Kirkpatrick and they said Joey, you know, and so
I said, off flying home and I did it and
I directed it for them, and I got to direct
Chris Kirkpatrick and Sal and Q in this short film
which we'll never see the light of day. Really, Oh,
it was horrendous. I think it came. I think it's
(06:23):
one of those things that didn't you know, just age weird.
I forgot even what the storyline was. It was on
about like no, it was Q and Sal's and I
think they've put it in the vault somewhere. Q might
have it somewhere. I should talk to him to see
if I'll release it. But it was like they were
on a date and booths together with separate girls, and
something happens when somebody goes to the the girls go
to the bathroom, and then they start fighting with each other.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
A full feud. Yeah, it was funny.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
I just remember, but it was we were young in
our careers and we weren't very savvy seasoned.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Yeah, but uh, it was fun. I remember. I remember that.
I haven't thought of Chris since that.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Yeah, I have weird even during Trolls.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
The trolls.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Yeah, every every kids movie that comes out. You were
at the premiere of it, and I'm like, me and
my kids are just going to go to a normal
movie theater and rubbed shoulders with the stars, all of them.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
Man, I can get you a list.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
That's my favorite thing to do, hands out, going to
movie premiere is my favorite thing.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
And my daughter's got the bug.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Now, best movie premiere you've ever been to? Excluding jokers,
because I'm sure that there's some that was mentality to
serious hated wait that's your your movie is coming out.
Speaker 1 (07:30):
But it was so like the network put us like
in the lobby of an AFC all. It wasn't even
it was just everybody's crammed. We were allowed twelve people each,
like it was so stupid, and my son had COVID,
Like it was just it was like a thing and
this is just yeah, just star pandemic.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
We didn't know it was COVID.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Then you were you were one of the last.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Yeah, my son was the outbreak.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Monkett started the lockdown Nation zero.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
You were you were at the premiere? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
you didn't come.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
Wasn't invited people. I never I never get invited any premieres.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
But premiers are great, I said, I would say my first,
like big one was Wonder Woman, right and what a
which was such a cool one because it was such
a big deal.
Speaker 3 (08:10):
But I remember I've probably had gone.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
To some before that, but I remember Wonder Woman being
one and for my plus one, actually I think I
brought Justin.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
I think Justin was my plus one.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
The kid was our Hey DJ, Hey DJ came out
and he and it was such a really, really cool premiere.
But I had been able to visit that set. I
saw the movie, and then I hung out and met
Patty Jenkins after I had met her before, and then
just met and hung out and had so much fun
at that premiere.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
That was a big one for me.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
I know you guys are friends, yes, yes, great. And
then the other one was Spider Man was unbelievable. Tom
Hollands first Spider Man Wow, which was And those Marvel
ones are are crazy. But I did get to steal
my daughter to go to see Boss Baby two. And
it took her like a date. And she was only
like four, I think when it came out and we
had time to kill right, and so we went and
(08:56):
we got there and because we got into the city earlier,
and we went and had sushi across the street and
I went on like.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
A little date with my daughter. Oh that's great. Really,
Now me and her to do all this sort of
stuff together, which is so fun.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Is she finally or she's obviously old er. Is she
at the age now where she's starting to put it together?
Like this is pretty cool. This is like a lot
of kids don't.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Get to do it.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
He takes the experience and I don't even know if
she's comparing herselves with other kids, but she takes the
experiences in which is great. Like we're going to Columbus,
Ohio in two days ago see AJR the AJR brother
Concert Oh that's great.
Speaker 3 (09:25):
Yeah, because I was supposed to.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
Go here in Connecticut and I had to have hernia
surgery and I wasn't up to par to travel just
me and her.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
So I was like, all right.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
I was like, I'm not gonna be jumping around this
concert three days after getting stitched up in the bellies
and I was like, I'm fresh. I still got this,
you know, I guess still got the stitch in. And
I was like, I can't do it. So we're going
and I'm actually flying with her. We're gonna go stay
over in Columbus and then go to the concert.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
And do you remember the last show we did together?
Speaker 3 (09:51):
Oh so funny.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
You were wrap old Joe Gaddle comedy tour. I couldn't
believe you even did these shows. People don't understand you
were in serious pain prior to and as soon as
you were done with the show. You're the most jovial
human being. Nobody hides. You're so good at compartmentalizing. Yeah,
you could have a devastating personal thing happened to you
(10:16):
and nobody would ever know. And you know, every show
we'd ever do, you'd walk in. You're gracious to security,
You're gracious to the people, run in the house, the
sound guy, whatever. You're so kind and sweet. That was
the only time I ever saw you where you were
like as soon as the show was over, you got back,
you pulled your pants down, get an ice bag. You
(10:36):
look miserable. And I took a picture of you into
the scale. One of my favorite pictures I've ever had
of you, because it's because you're looking dead at me,
but you're so honest. It's just like, I've never seen
him like this.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
You know what, the worst you have, the show you have,
the you have.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
That's so funny because you sent me we should put
up aside by side of the picture. After my first
set ever, Oh yeah, dad was not a comedy, right,
I did it And.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
It's from Appleton, Wisconsin, because you're with me.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
And then the last show, Yeah, and I look withered.
I look I was at the first one. I'm like,
I did it, and the seconde like I did it.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
I just got out.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
But it's interesting because you know, you take a picture
some of you, Oh you just you know, most people
just smile. You put on a smile in that picture. Though,
backstage in Wisconsin, that picture I did capture it's not
just you smiling. You can see there's some resonance of
like pride in it. Yeah, you took forty five minutes
on stage for the first time ever going solo. And
(11:33):
there's a different smile in that picture. Because we've got
thousands of pictures together on tour.
Speaker 3 (11:38):
That but the crown in the other.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
My god, but to be there for the first and
then the last, I got to put those side. I'll
send them to you. Ye oh, my god, they're great.
Speaker 3 (11:47):
It's so bad. So you can see it on me. No,
theres no hide in it.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
It was so funny because we didn't even have if
you I don't know if you remember, we didn't have
an ice pack.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
So Shae was with us and I said, Shay, she goes,
what do you mean?
Speaker 1 (11:59):
I say, I say, need ice, And she just went
we had done the shopping right whether she went and
got like the snacks of the green room and she
had a plastic bag and she went and asked him
that had ice, And she cracked ice trays into the
plastic bag from like shop right or whatever it was.
And I just saw a plastic bag of house ice inside.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
My hates.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Great show biz.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Oh that's biz. That's a biz.
Speaker 4 (12:23):
Baby.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
I was driving here and I thought of something and
that it was interesting because I was like, I've never
seen this, I've never done this, and I wanted to
ask you. I saw a girl crossing the stree where
I'm sitting in traffic in New York City, right. I
saw a girl across the street and she was just
full blown crying in public, crossing the street by herself,
and I was like, Oh, that woman's going through a lot.
I was like, but also like, I don't know anything's
(12:46):
ever happened to me that I would just continue my
day and be.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Crying, like in my commute and just walking.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
She wasn't even on the phone riding, she was just
crying walking yeah, and pardon me. Wanted to be like, oh,
I should ask her if she needs anything. So my
question for you is, if you're that person that's crying
in the street, do you want a stranger to.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Come up to you and be like, Hey, what's the matter,
or are you like, leave me the hell alone.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
I would assume that person's like leave me, leave me
the hell alone, because obviously, if it's tapping into something
that's resonant within your soul. That's that's bringing up that emotion.
It's so personal, right, and you don't want somebody you
have a complete stranger. And here's the thing about like
in New York City, if she's hot, like every guy
(13:26):
in the city's gonna be like, hey, you need some
you know, And if you're not, it's just like she's
just crying, which is which is sad because it's still
just a human being that's going through something. But I
think that's the instant natural thought that a guy would
have in a joking kind of way. But have you
ever I wouldn't want to bother someone, but you have
such a you break barriers immediately. So I think that
(13:49):
full shot a shop. First off, a complete stranger coming
up to you and you're crying and going, hey are
you okay? You'd be like wait what, But then you
add the second layer, which you're so used to they
put it together. It's Joe Gatto, What the fuck is
going on here? Right?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Did you say anything?
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Or no?
Speaker 3 (14:04):
No? I was driving and she was walking, so I
was made things.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
But then I was like, I don't know if I've
ever had and I've been through some stuff, but I
don't think I've ever had a walking crying thing?
Speaker 3 (14:13):
Have you ever had a walking crying thing? I actually
just remembered it.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Have you ever been in public and just started crying?
And I just remembered I had a walking crying thing
in Manhattan.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
I just remembered it.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Now.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
I was like, oh, I would I would never do that,
but I did.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
I was seeing a girl and I had just moved
back from la This is two thousand and five, and
we had gotten together and I put together this whole thing,
and I had gotten a hotel room and we went
to see a play or whatever, and I went to
Tiffany's and I had bought like the standard do you remember,
like back in the day, there was that heart right
that everybody you got, verybody I bought and then I
you know, we we spent the night together in the
(14:47):
hotel and then I gave it to her and she
just was like, I can't accept this.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
It's I don't think we could be together. And I
was like, and I.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Sing, you guys hung out the night?
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Did yeah?
Speaker 1 (14:56):
And I started crying. She had just started seeing somebody.
I think it was something and I had start because
I just.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
Moved back from laure and she and I.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
Had started crying and I was singing, Oh God, I
was singing my.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Girl, Oh my God, thank you. I quit. I don't
know this person. I don't know this person. This is
a stranger. Show me your identification. I don't know you.
You were singing my girl in the.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
And then I had to walk to get my car,
and I was crying still waiting in the vallet.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
I'm just remembering. I was this woman.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Here's what's gonna happen.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
Nobody asked me if I was okay.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
As soon as we're done taping, you can see a
half Asian crying walking to DeRosa's apartment going I can't
believe in Prontal with that. I did see. I did
see a woman cry one time in the street walking
and I did. I did approach because great, I see
that appening. You have you have therapist vibes. Well, I
was in my young twenty you know, you don't know
any better. So I was just like, oh, that's somebody's
(15:58):
in need.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
I go over.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
I go, mister, you do you need anything? She goes,
I'm okay. I'm like, okay, if you need anything, just
I'm right here. She's like I just came from a
show called Fresh Towels.
Speaker 5 (16:07):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
I'm sorry, that's your I just put that together.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
Tickets available, Ticket's always available. We got Jiggy with this.
Now we have a jiggycam, which is amazing. Mark your guards.
Speaker 5 (16:33):
You're always on a mic too. I got so much
flak on tour, like get a mic for the show.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Yeah yes, but now people can visually see you. And
my favorite line, my favorite line when I go on
tour with you guys is my opening line. You know,
I love it. It's my favorite line. I go ladies
and gentlemen. How about it for Jiggy? Keep up with
him on social media and that's Jiggy spell with an N.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
And my fit part is that normally there's two people
like that in the audience at LAM and he goes ah,
they get it.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
I you know, Marked your Guardian is now officially signed
up for my new tour. I don't know if you
saw the artwork. It's the let's get into a tour
my new tour with Joe Gallice. Well you're there, but
then Marked your Guardian, Yeah, Mark, Mark's big deal.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Maybe be size eight nine. I pumped up to a
nine because your name.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
Is so long, it's a crazy name. I still don't
know how to spell it. Yeah, I've been friends with
you for quite a few years now, and I still
have no idea.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
I don't I know if I know your middle name Edward. Oh, Edward,
that's right. Mark.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
It took me a year to learn to even know
how to say it Edward. I mean, uh Ji, Guardian.
It took me forever to put it all together. I
was like, I don't know how to say it, so
I just said, fuck it, I'm not gonna I'm not
gonna learn it.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
He also has forty seven emails that are still active.
I don't know if you it all so and I type,
I just type J I g in my like to say,
like emails.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
I'm not even kidding. There's like nine emails.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Coming back, a lot of email.
Speaker 5 (18:06):
I am very consistent with keeping Gmail, but I have
like five different Gmail against you know, over the years.
You're like, but they're dating by I've.
Speaker 2 (18:16):
Had the same email forever.
Speaker 3 (18:18):
I just had.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
I just did this thing where I signed the emails
for my children because we got an Apple Watches and
you had to send their iCloud. And I was like
this is going to be their email for life, like
thinking that, but I they could easily change it. But
I'm like, this is a big moment, right, So I
had some fun ones lined up and my wife was like, no,
we're gonna use the name idiot, not gonna be silly
Hampster twenty two.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
Cloud dot crop.
Speaker 5 (18:42):
You have numbers in your in your email, which is
like a very Aol move of yeah, like that's very amateur, amateur.
Speaker 3 (18:49):
Well that's because there's a lot of Steve. There's a
lot of Steve Burns.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
It's me blues clothes.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
Mark your guardian. I guess that's fair.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
But I marked your guardian one and no one would
be like there's no two?
Speaker 3 (19:02):
Why yeah, why.
Speaker 5 (19:03):
Why stop giving away my emails? There's Mark Georgent one,
two three. I have seven of.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
Them, seven emails and still tickets available. That's how pathetic
it is. My son, by the way, is tapped into something.
He you know when you got timing, right, you get timing.
My son the other day, he uh, he leaves his
cereal milk on the table all the time. I go,
can't grab your milk, put in the sink and pour
(19:30):
the milk out. I've told you a thousand times, go
do it now. And he picks up his bowl milk
and he looks at me and just goes.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
I've been up bed boy.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
And I fucking lost it, dude. I just bent over
and I just kept crying laughing. And now he knows,
he knows that's the thing. So I heard my wife
yelling at it.
Speaker 3 (19:53):
Cat, I told you stop putting the towels on the ground.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
It's got to dry.
Speaker 3 (19:56):
Poke it on the hook.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
And I just hear I've been up be Oh my god,
it is just brilliant to pull that out of the
eighth after seeing it on a Looney Tunes cartoon. Oh
my god, it's so funny. The best being a dad
is best, So the best.
Speaker 3 (20:15):
That's great, man.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
But we are two cool moms and we're here to help.
We're here to help. I want to ask you a
quick question. Okay, do you remember that Kansas City chiefs kicker.
Speaker 3 (20:23):
He was Frank Dogado.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Oh I forget. He was in the news like a
month ago, and this made like the rounds, and there
were people that are furious at him. But he was
basically saying, you know, he was He was speaking at
a Catholic university. He's Catholic, obviously, and he was saying,
the greatest job a woman can to have is being
a mother and a wife. And he was explaining that
(20:47):
and then he said, you know, I'm here with the Chiefs.
You know, I won a super Bowl, but the greatest
job I've ever had is being a father and a husband.
And I was thinking, and when you hear it in context,
I was like, absolutely, you know, I've I'm a comedian,
I've done fun things most people would.
Speaker 3 (21:05):
Be countless films, television shows, countless can take it, still
ail ticket, still a al punch up live.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
But I was listening to him and I'm like, this
guy professionally has has hit the crescendo.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
Right.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
He's on an air defining team, he's a kicker, he's
got a Super Bowl ring maybe one or I think two,
maybe the peak of his profession. And he's still saying,
take us out all that being a father and a
husband is the greatest job in the world. And I
was like, yeah, that I agree with that, and I
think my wife would agree with her greatest role as
(21:38):
being a wife and a mother. And it got taken
out of count and just it turned into a news story,
you know, And I was just curious if you had
come across or anything just as a parent. I think
anybody who's a parent could could hear that and hear
it and go yeah, one hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (21:54):
Yeah, well you know that the the title of that
probably didn't say all that. You just said that's why.
So that's why people get in feared, right. The title
of the news story wasn't yeah, explained to that one.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
It was his picture and he's blown off on Twitter,
like he tells he's basically telling women to get in
a to make a sandwich. And it was like, I
thought it was actually a really sweet sentiment.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
I think it's insightful if you're if you are, especially
if you've concentrated a lot on your career like I had,
and then shift your focus back to fatherhood and then
realize the benefits of both. And I was like, you know,
so I think that's that's a valid point. I would say,
you know, fatherhood is probably the most rewarding thing.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Sure, yeah, even more than you know.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
It's hard because like you think about everything that you've
done and all that you've achieved, and I think that
even if I can't eve imagine because we do like
our jobs.
Speaker 3 (22:41):
But I can't even imagine people like that hate their jobs. Right,
and then they're like.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
But at least I get to be a father, right,
because there's that side of the coin too.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
Of course, people like that's the only enjoyment they get.
You know, imagine if you if you go for two
I mention if you hate kids and you're a real
dumb fuck kid, just and like, daddy, I want to
eat chalk. You're like, shut up.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Just banging his head and he's like, you know, he's like,
I've been a ben boy.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
I really had.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
He's not doing he's not doing it with he's not
doing it with comedic timing. He's just been like I've
been whoa, whoa she has a bow and arrow.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
Yeah, like it could be that could be like a
they're over to this.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
Oh man, that's in existence. Nobody wants.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
No, those people end up on dateline, yeah for sure. Yeah,
it's always the hut.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
And then they become famous.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
That's right.
Speaker 3 (23:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Well we're here to help, right, We're here to help,
and that's as as two fathers, we once again have
given been given great maternal advice from our moms, and
we're here to help you guys. So before we kick
it off, two cool moms. Pod at Gmail is where
you send all of your queries, an your dilemmas. You
can even send us a video.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Now we're going to video submissions, video submission, say, you
can send us a video as well.
Speaker 3 (23:55):
We're really updating everything here.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
It's we're pumped. We weren't coach before. I wouldn't even
say that. When we first started, we were with Spirit Yeah,
and now we're Delta in the executive lounge.
Speaker 3 (24:07):
Comfort plus comfortless. Yeah. Okta.
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Here we.
Speaker 5 (24:12):
Head to the first question. All right, this one comes from.
Speaker 3 (24:15):
Also Yes, I'm sorry, who's speaking this is?
Speaker 5 (24:19):
This is Jiggy kadd.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Pat and bending.
Speaker 5 (24:23):
All right, so this one comes from Alex who hit
us on the Instagram. Good evening, Cool Mommy's my name
is Alex. I'm in the Air Force, so he's in the.
Speaker 3 (24:30):
He's thank you for I have to say that, right, yeah,
yeah yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
Out of all of them, they get to fly around,
did the best, they get treated the best, but thank
you for your service.
Speaker 5 (24:39):
My wife is afraid when I get out of the
Air Force and become an airline pilot that I'm going
to be gone for long stretches of time. How do
I calm her nerves for being gone for about fifteen
to twenty days a month. Thanks for the help and
love you both.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
Yeah, nobody's going to be shooting at you, honey, like
nobody's gonna be trying to take my plane down and
will active war.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
So that's the plus. I guess you start with the
pluses pluses.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
Here's the negatives. I would just start sending pictures of
hot stewardesses. Don't worry, I'll be well to take care
of Jetty gets hungry on the road.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
All right, it's seriousness, let's see.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
So well, the biggest thing is a career change, right,
so you're gonna you have to deal with that, which
is what we've been through.
Speaker 3 (25:22):
I'm sure stretches the time apart is tough.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
So you're just gonna have to make sure that the
time together is spent together, or that you're in the
moment while you're there. I think that was a pitfall
I had had at one point, was when you were present,
you were there, but you weren't you know, there physically,
and you're not there emotionally or mentally, or you know,
just be there in the moment.
Speaker 3 (25:44):
That's going to be the most important thing. I think.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
Yes, two guys that travel a lot, we've had discussions
about this as well. And you've lost a lot of weight. Yeah,
you normally would like push that. You can't even push
it out to be funny. No, not. You look fantastic,
Thank you, But I appreciate that.
Speaker 3 (26:02):
What the hell is that has to do with day
for Sorry?
Speaker 2 (26:03):
Sorry, I was just looking at it. I was like, wow,
you look great.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
You don't look like an airline carrier anymore.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
But no, I agree with you. That was something you
had said. And Billy Gardell, a good friend of mine,
told me years ago. He's like, because you had mentioned it,
you know about everything whatever. You've been pretty public about things. Yeah,
you know to a degree. But but like when you're home,
be home, and like I make sure to spend as
much time as I can with my children, but I
also do everything I can to be like, all right,
(26:31):
just why don't you and I go to lunch today,
or let's let you and I take a walk and
just you know, feed the security for her because those
days that I am gone, you know, she's by herself.
She's spinning so many plates. And also you know, there's
I'm working in Vegas all the time, I'm boozing it up.
I'm out till three or four in the morning, so
I'm still checking in with her, But I want to
(26:52):
do everything I can to provide her with a sense
of security. That's this relationship that you're attacked.
Speaker 1 (26:57):
I think you neverled it on the head because insecurity
definitely creeps into when time's apart on both sides of it,
Like when I'm away and like if I call and
she doesn't pick up the phone, like I'm like, what's
what's happening?
Speaker 3 (27:08):
What's going on? Or I'm like, you know, what is
everybody okay? It's like, you know that's addiblely you go
through the houses on fire, the dogs bright and everybody right,
you know.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
But I think that's that's a part of it too.
So to help blanket all that and bubb will wrap
those moments. It's like to make sure the time spent
together is reassuring there's love there and and you feel
like you have a partner in the moment.
Speaker 2 (27:30):
Yeah, security, I think is the insecurity is what is
where I think trouble stem from. Right the minute, it's
just like there's question there's whatever. I don't know why
I'm thinking about. Billy Gardell one time told me a
plumber came to his house one time and he and
it's during the day and he's like, oh, we've got
a plumber. I didn't know we have a plumber. I
guess there's some issue. There was an issue, and it
(27:52):
was like five grand with the plumbing stuff. Okay and
uh and and he said the guy was kind of
good looking, you know. He comes in, it's a good
looking plumber. He writes a check for five grand, and
his wife is kind of like a little twinkle in
the eye. He's like, Okay, that was weird. And they're
like three weeks later, he's coming home and he sees
the plumber and he goes, five grand. Please tell me
(28:12):
my wife that's great. Rather but to the to the
to Alex, I believe the Air Force pilot a thank
you so much for for what you do. And then
as two frequent flyers, thank you very much for keeping
(28:35):
us safe in the skies, especially with all these crazy
videos you see. Sure of everybody on the airlines, I've
never seen an incident like that happen, but I'm sure
it must be a common occurrence because it's always in
the new stuff.
Speaker 3 (28:45):
For as much as we fly, I've never seen it back.
I never had one.
Speaker 2 (28:47):
Hup, Yeah, never seen it.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
Oh we said it out loud though. Now watching Forget
it's gonna be awesome. Yeah, yeah, for sure. And you're
flying next, so let me know, get back to Nashville.
How that goes. Yeah, I would just say, spend time
together and uh, you know, re sure. And also be
in touch when you're on the road. Yes, be in
touch on when you're on the road, that's very important.
Speaker 3 (29:05):
Be able well out.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Don't answer while you're flying, put it on the do
not to stare it while you're in the air. But
because you don't want to, you don't want to come
over yell you about the life.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
But don't they just flip in an autopilot. That's what
I hear they do now because the computers are so good,
they're there to help ascend problem. But once you're up there,
you just kind of flip a switch and you're just
kind of yeah, but what do you think they're doing?
Speaker 1 (29:25):
End I'm playing angry birds like they look at beat
boops and things.
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Yeah, they gotta make sure you get it. The beatpoops
and all right, yeah, all right.
Speaker 5 (29:37):
Next question comes from Celeste. She says she believes that
honesty is always the best policy, but I'm not sure
people always want to hear the truth. If you ask
me a question, I'm going to give you a totally answered,
honest answer. Is there any time when honesty is not
the best policy?
Speaker 2 (29:55):
Well, I'll tell you this right now, there is not
a human being on the planet that is better at
being honest than you. You are, so you cut to
the bone so quick, there's no bs and around you.
I and there's another good friend, a mutual friend of
Vince Vaughn. He's the same way. He just let's get
(30:15):
to the truth right now, what is the truth? And
I will tell you the truth, so we're not sugarcoat
in this and bullshit. And those friends I feel are
better to have than the one that kind of pussy
foots around it and is going to be sweet and kind.
Yeah right, And then it takes you like four weeks
or even four years later to go, why didn't you
ever say anything? You know, I think those of the situation,
(30:38):
the paradigm of that relationship. I'd prefer to have the
blunt force instrument as opposed to the sugar coated you
know friend what is That's that's what I really appreciate
about your friendship. So you are as honest as the
day is long.
Speaker 3 (30:52):
Yeah, but I don't know how how you took to
it in the beginning.
Speaker 1 (30:55):
And I love the freesture for you too, because you
and I, you know, we established a friendship for real
after like we were just we were friendly and whatever.
But you and I we're righty to die now. But
you in the beginning, I don't know if you knew
how to take I like it though, yeah, because I
think I think you got there because they're like, oh,
that's just how he Oh, that's how he is. Like yeah,
(31:15):
I think it's It's interesting, right, I think it's interesting.
You have to you know, there are levels of honesty
with you are with different people, Like I'm very honest
with you, very honest with the boys.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
You know. I'm honest with you.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
You know, I have other friends that I'm honest with,
but maybe like I won't say as much sure or
as quickly, you know, right, I think there are But
I do think always honesty is is pretty it is important,
but also not at the expense of people's feelings, and
I think that's where the blawings get blurred.
Speaker 2 (31:50):
You're you're a very emotional, intelligent person, Like there have
been one or two times where I may have said
something on stage or went went the wrong way. And
you're you're a leader. You're smart enough. You've been in
situations where you're leading where you you just say, hey,
can I talk to you for a second, and you
you're you're smart enough to go, let's not do this
in front of everybody. Yeah, no, need to Let's do
(32:12):
it here. You know, some people want a grandstand. Some
people want to like, hey, I'm going to go around
and stuff. It's just like it's ridiculous. So I you know,
something is easy, Hey, where do you want to go eat?
I don't care, let's go. You're like, you know, if
I say, hey, let's go at sushi, I don't want sushi,
It's like okay, we know, because you could end up
with somebody who didn't really want sushi, but they're gonna
sit there and they go along with it. It's like I
(32:33):
didn't really want to go. Well, why didn't you say anything?
Speaker 3 (32:35):
You know?
Speaker 2 (32:36):
And I think that's that's why I prefer to have
somebody who's right there so you understand the dynamic and
now there's no there's no hard feelings one hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
I think there's certain things where the number one thing
if your feelings get hurt, say something, because no one
knows how you're feeling unless you say it. You could
and then you get yourself upset because like, well they
should know I'm upset. They don't, So let them know
the way that they're definitely gonna know you're upset and
have a chance to correct something.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Right, And we've had this conversation a bunch.
Speaker 1 (33:03):
Is like, if you say it to them, they know
you're taking out off the table.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
The people not knowing because you drive yourself crazy.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Right You're like, oh, I wish they you know, I
wish they knew, Well why don't Why don't they know?
Speaker 3 (33:15):
Because they just they don't know, right, you know?
Speaker 1 (33:17):
So I think that's a big when when honesty comes
into play, Be honest about how you're feeling to people.
Speaker 3 (33:22):
I think that's number one.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
And people can't handle it, then they just maybe it's
not supposed maybe it's not for you, But.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
I've come to you for advice. You recently I called
you about a situation where a friend of mine and
you know, again, it's just like that person thinks differently
than you. Isn't that amazing? It's like, oh yeah, yeah,
of course they operate differently. So it was, you know,
it's good to get those reminders of a different perspective
at times. But but I believe you are one hundred
(33:49):
percent correct. Honestly, is the best policy. And it's something
even with my wife, I think we're I.
Speaker 3 (33:55):
Was just gonna ask you, would you tell jess Youdan
like her outfit?
Speaker 2 (33:59):
There have been occasions without her prompting it. She always asked, though,
She's like, do you like this or this? I'm like,
I like that? God, you know, because I just know,
you know, but half the time I don't care.
Speaker 3 (34:10):
Me and Bessie just.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
Went to a gala, uh two nights ago, I think
it was, and and she was like, and she just
had and I went, oh, no, not for you, and
she started laughing. She goes and then she goes, yeah
I didn't. I wasn't sure. Oh I'm sure this is
not a good dress.
Speaker 3 (34:25):
We gotta try someone else. We got, I said, what else?
We got in the hopper and that was what she.
Speaker 1 (34:29):
I mean, because we've been together so long, she gets it.
But the same thing with me, Like she'll be like
those shoes. But I think I bring that out in
her because we allow it, Like we allow the honesty
in her house.
Speaker 3 (34:39):
And even my daughter and son. I see them now.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
My daughter, like she'll get dressed and she'll like, you
know how everybody's like, look how perfect my little princess
and whatever? You know, my doos got great style. She
just loves it. And she'll be like that and I'll
be like, I was like, is that the jacket we're
gonna go with? And she's like, I have another one?
Should wear that one?
Speaker 3 (34:55):
Like she like talking about it, like look how pretty
my princess is. You know.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
It's like, you know, you want to show them that
there's options and different things.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
It's not like you're not going to hit home run
every time.
Speaker 2 (35:04):
But it's great again to go back to security. Your
daughter has security. She's cure in herself, and I think
that's so important. The other day, I was walk up
with my son somewhere and I was ribbing him. I
was just giving it to him, you know, in like
a funny way, like I was saying something about something
he'd like his appearance, and he just laughed it off,
and he laughed along with the joke instead of being like,
(35:26):
do you really not like that? And I was like
in that moment, I was like, I didn't realize until
he was laughing, but I was like, am I being
a little hard on him? But then I was like,
he's rolling with it. He's so confident in himself. He's
laughing at it. He's not saying, Daddy, you hurt my
feelings or something like that. And I just thought, boy,
that's a great what a great trait that is, and
(35:46):
something I wouldn't have even thought about or put together
unless I had that moment, you know.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
The best thing to do is like, like, I'll get that.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Like with the jacket thing, she was like, she's like,
she's like, should I wear this jacket?
Speaker 4 (35:57):
This?
Speaker 3 (35:57):
Check? I said, what, Jack, do you think you were right?
I'm not going to tell with the way, what do
you want? Which one do you think you like better? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (36:01):
And then she'll put that one on and she's she's like,
how does it look? I said, do you like it?
Speaker 3 (36:04):
Like? That's it? Like?
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Yeah, great, good, let's go what makes you feel better.
Speaker 3 (36:08):
Yeah, yeah, it doesn't. I would have put the other jacket.
She looked like shit, but I'm not going to say that.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
So I was like, you know, you picked that jacket,
you picked the wrong one. We're going to go out
in public with it this.
Speaker 2 (36:17):
I'm We've been to so many restaurants, right, so many restaurants.
The water's like, how's the food? Jes like, that's okay,
I know, don't ask me. It's I've never seen anything
like it, like like and then they go okay. But
like most people I think would just be playing, go
it's great, thank you so much, and you go back
to it. It's like it kind of sucks, but you
will always always always be honest.
Speaker 3 (36:39):
Well I'm not in polite.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
You're never like, hey, listen, this was great, but the
mashed potatoes they were a mess.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
Yeah yeah. You know, there's been desserts that have come
to our table, like, hey, how was the cheesecake and
they're so proud of which I was like, it was okay, Yeah, it.
Speaker 3 (36:51):
Was okay, you know, but you know what, the sherbet
was fantastic or.
Speaker 2 (36:55):
I don't like it. Yeah, one bite into a meal,
I don't like it. Give me something else to take this. Yeah,
I mean most people picture this. I just I'm not
gonna put myself.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
Through eating this. Give me the penny, you know.
Speaker 1 (37:05):
I'm not gonna sit here and be like, oh I
should have got the penne No, I'll get the Yeah,
I'm not gonna do it.
Speaker 3 (37:10):
Why life's too short. I got honoies to clog get
into it.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
But it is one hundred percent the way to live
if you can. I can't bring myself to be as
confident as you are to be that honest. But but
I'm telling you, you just you you shortcut so many
other things. People know from the jump this this is
gonna be what he wants to get this done. Otherwise
you know, you're just wasting time.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
I will say honesty is a great policy, but also
be mindful of people's feelings. Yes, don't be mean about it,
like if you know it's like you know.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
These people like, I'm just honest. If you can't take it,
you can't take it. That's not my approach.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
I'm not like right right right, because I don't put
myself in situations where I'm just like, oh, you look,
you're so stupid.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
Like I'm just being honest.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
You're stupid, right, Like, that's not for something that doesn't
help anybody.
Speaker 3 (37:54):
That's not right, right. You know, I could think you're
stupid and you wouldn't even know it ever, But I wasn't.
I was just looking to you for the next question.
Don't be so stupid. I love you.
Speaker 5 (38:17):
All right, we'll have to we'll do a fun question.
Speaker 2 (38:18):
This one's a fun one.
Speaker 5 (38:19):
This one's from Yeah, these are all This one's from Grace,
which is particularly fun. I don't know if this is
a question from the internet, but I loved it. Uh
Is the kool aid man the jar or the juice?
Speaker 3 (38:31):
Oh? Oh yeah, that's a great question.
Speaker 4 (38:37):
Night.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
He's got to be the jar.
Speaker 3 (38:40):
He's gotta be the jar. So you're just saying, if
you pour out the kool aid, is he dead? Is
he got empty? Is he an empty boss?
Speaker 5 (38:46):
Is he talking from within the jar? Or is he
the jar himself?
Speaker 2 (38:50):
He's like he's like Frosty. He's like frost Frosty.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
Melts right, There's no, he's a puddle. The puddle's not
talking to you, so he's not.
Speaker 2 (38:59):
This is a quest.
Speaker 3 (39:00):
Okay, So that's a great that's the right way to
go down it.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
So if the frosty the snowman melts, the puddle's not
talking to you.
Speaker 3 (39:06):
The snowman is gone.
Speaker 2 (39:07):
He's gone.
Speaker 3 (39:07):
Got it. So now if the juice gets poured out,
he's gone. He's gone.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
That's what I would. So he's the jew And then
I thought that the jar is him because he's got
hands and legs. Right, he's got it. Does he have
a little spoon, Well.
Speaker 5 (39:19):
Here's that when he comes when he blasts the wall. Yeah,
but when he blasts through the wall, his face doesn't
juggle in the in the juice. Yeah, if he was
the juice, he with his face would juggle a round.
Speaker 2 (39:29):
Wait, all that all that mortar and brickshit was that
would get in there too. I'd be like, you gotta
clean it. You can't drink that cool Yeah, you can't
drink it. Nobody's drinking that cool aid.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
I don't care how big the cult is you if
you're if you take the kool aid man and you
grab him by his grabbed by the scuff of his neck,
and you tilt him over like a teapot and pour
everything out, is a kool aid man and you stand
it back up?
Speaker 3 (39:48):
Does the jaw go? Why do you do that, does
the puddle go? Why am I out here? That's that's
the conundrum.
Speaker 5 (39:55):
It's a real conundrum.
Speaker 2 (39:56):
I think it's gotta I think I'm going I'm going
with my Frosty thesis.
Speaker 3 (40:00):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (40:00):
I think if Frosty meltz, there's no Frosty. And I
think if the kool Aid is drunk, he's kool Aid,
he's kool Aid.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
It's kool Aid man.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
It's the it's it's the product. Right, he is the
kool Aid. He's not there to sell you a jar.
He's there to sell you the powdery.
Speaker 3 (40:18):
So you are equating the vase to the magic hat, right,
because if he's in the vase, he becomes alive to
become this person.
Speaker 1 (40:26):
So once to put a Frosty the cap on a snowman,
he becomes Frosty the snowman. So if you take the
hat off, Frosty unfrostified. And if you break the vase,
cool Aid's dead. So I would say, I think we're
all We're all on team.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
It's the kool Aid.
Speaker 5 (40:40):
What do you think I always thought it was a jar.
Speaker 2 (40:43):
Oh, so you're on the opposite side of the fence here.
Speaker 5 (40:45):
I think it's the jar because the face does he move?
Speaker 2 (40:48):
Yeah, you're dumb.
Speaker 5 (40:49):
The face doesn't move, like every time he walks, his
face doesn't.
Speaker 3 (40:52):
I see. I get the nou sloshing thing.
Speaker 5 (40:55):
I think that the kool Aid creates the man within
the jar.
Speaker 3 (40:59):
The kool Aid is the man in the jar. It
needs to be in the jar though, so there won
the symbiotic.
Speaker 5 (41:04):
I think biotic thing. Okay, I think the jar comes alive.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Get out.
Speaker 5 (41:08):
It comes alive with the Jews.
Speaker 2 (41:10):
Dude, I mean there's there's a part of that frosty element. Then, yeah,
that's the analogy. But you're on the other side of it.
Speaker 3 (41:16):
Yeah, you're you went you went left?
Speaker 1 (41:18):
Okay, Well, you know, we don't want to be devisive
here on two cool moms and Jiggy.
Speaker 3 (41:21):
Apparently it's cool.
Speaker 2 (41:23):
You're also mega you want the pizza hat on instead
Pizza Gate.
Speaker 5 (41:30):
We had time for one more.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
By the way, Jiggy is the only comic I know
that always wears his own merch. It's a cool hat though,
that's the Well, that's why, that's why I like that hat. Yeah,
I really do like that hat, and I still have mine.
But it's the white with the it's the white with
the black mesh and the I wear other.
Speaker 3 (41:46):
I wear other people's march all the time. Do you
I love that? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (41:49):
I do that. You and sal do that a lot.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
Yeah, I mean I like I like to promote other
people's stuff, and I also like to be comfy.
Speaker 2 (41:55):
Well, I'm I'm promoting this uh little known band called Oasis.
Speaker 3 (41:58):
Oh, I thought you were talking about you promote you
promote the desert. You're like, I love the Sahara.
Speaker 2 (42:09):
We're these guys pretty awesome.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
Okay, well more.
Speaker 5 (42:13):
Final question comes from Brandon from the Instagram says, my
brother is dating a girl that's clearly manipulating him, and
my parents won't do anything about it. What should I do?
Speaker 3 (42:24):
Oh? That's tough.
Speaker 1 (42:26):
Uh So he's got his brother's got a girl and
he doesn't like it, basically doesn't like it, doesn't like
the way that's going into you know, other people's business
is tough, though.
Speaker 3 (42:39):
Manipulating the parents though, that's how.
Speaker 5 (42:41):
I think I read it with the wrong emphasis. Girl
the girl dating girl is clearly manipulating him, and my
parents won't do anything about it.
Speaker 2 (42:51):
Oh, gotcha?
Speaker 3 (42:52):
So that changes the whole question. You want to try again? Yes,
try it again, jig Hey.
Speaker 2 (42:56):
Dumb, dumb.
Speaker 5 (42:57):
My brother's dating girl that's clearly manipulating him, period, and
my parents won't do anything about it.
Speaker 3 (43:02):
Oh, inflection changes the question.
Speaker 1 (43:04):
He's waiting for the parents to do something about it,
got it. He should be waiting for the brother to
do something. Hey, dude, what's his name again?
Speaker 3 (43:10):
Brandon?
Speaker 2 (43:11):
Hey Brandon? Why don't you get laid and not worry
about it? Dude, whyn't you stop being jealous of your
brother because he's crushing ass? Oh? Yeah, you want a
fresh one from your older brother or from uncle Stevie.
Hit the streets, find a girl, go to Dave and
Buster's at Happy hour, make it happen.
Speaker 3 (43:26):
Christ lose to for one ski Bols.
Speaker 2 (43:29):
No, he's looking up for his bro. That's really sweet.
Speaker 3 (43:31):
That is sweet. But I mean that's the to your pointers.
You can't do it. You can't do it.
Speaker 1 (43:35):
I mean, I didn't you know, if you don't like somebody,
they end up, you know, getting married, having kids. You're
the godfather of this kid that you hate, this hateful child.
Speaker 3 (43:41):
I mean, you know you know that's it. I mean,
it could be it could be a very nasty road. Yeah,
you know what you know.
Speaker 1 (43:46):
Then all of a sudden, you know, he gets sick,
passes away, and now you got take care of the
wife because she's got an injury from the big accident
they were in.
Speaker 3 (43:53):
Her legs don't work, and now you're pushing the wheelchair.
Speaker 1 (43:56):
And now you're stuck with this woman that you were like,
I didn't like you back in the you know, twenty
year five years ago.
Speaker 3 (44:02):
That could be tough. You don't want to put yourself
in that situation.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
Why on your business you really paint a picture? I'll
tell you, because that's the thing that can happen. Let's
say HM and a girl, they get together, they get married, Okay,
and now that's the end of life. All this is
the in law. You go and you spend the holidays
and you want to Thanksgiving passed me the turkey. We
don't eat turkey. We need toe furkey. We're trying to
say the turkey. So fuck you, bitch, I want turkey.
You can't have turkey. You ruin in my life. You
say all this at Thanksgiving, you walk out, you don't
talk for twelve years. Your brother has a devastating accident,
(44:27):
he ends up passing away, and now that. She's like,
you know, I, if you ever want to see your
nephew again, you're gonna come and have te furkey. And
he's like, ah, fine, I have t Ferky. You go
there and have toll ferk. You get locked in the house,
it gets taken over by strangers, and now you're in
a hostage situation.
Speaker 3 (44:40):
The only way to save our life is to kill
the nephew.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
Now you kill the nephew, and now you have to
marry the wife.
Speaker 3 (44:46):
And now she's your wife. And now if you said
something twenty five years ago, she would hold that against you.
Speaker 1 (44:52):
Dadda, Yeah, wow, you really I think about these things.
Speaker 2 (44:57):
That is absolutely part of the multi verse. Is you
you you doctor stranged it for us?
Speaker 3 (45:02):
I did? I did? Or you could just you know,
say I don't like your girlfriends like me. Neither got.
Speaker 1 (45:09):
God you said something to get it. Get in people's
relationships is tough. I always try to step back. I
made the mistake once of telling one of my very
good friends that I didn't like the woman he was with,
and uh, they were still together for multiple years after that,
and it was very awkward. Oh man, Yeah, and he
didn't he didn't appreciate that, and then I was like,
I think that open my eyes to be like some
(45:30):
things you just don't need to make your business even
though if you feel like you were doing the right
thing for your friend, which I did feel like I
was doing. I was just telling him I don't think
this is the right one for you. And he did
not receive that.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
Well, right, but there they are still together.
Speaker 3 (45:43):
And no, okay, I was right, but I don't put
in his face.
Speaker 2 (45:46):
At the end of the day, you were right.
Speaker 3 (45:47):
Yeah, okay, at the end of the day, I was right,
but I don't like to rob it in his face.
But he knows.
Speaker 2 (45:52):
Is he sitting in this room, No, he's not.
Speaker 3 (45:55):
I was looking at the camera because he watches and
you know so.
Speaker 2 (45:59):
Also so this just the little clues we get in
the emails. It's like he's reaching out to his parents
to do something about it. He seems young. The brother's
obviously young. It's a fresh relationship. So what's his name again, Brandon?
Speaker 3 (46:16):
Just know this.
Speaker 2 (46:17):
There's gonna be a thousand girls that are going to
be interested and dating and maybe not and all this
there's only one one. They would say, Oh, I'm looking
for the one. There's only one one. Sometimes there's two ones,
sometimes there's three ones in a lifetime. So odds are
if this young relationship is going to ride it out,
they're going to learn experiences from it and make the
(46:39):
next relationship even better. So just I know you care
about your brother, just shut your mouth, write it out.
You can't do anything about it. Mommy and Daddy can't
do anything about it. And mom and dad are a
little more experienced than you are, and if they ain't
doing shit, then you shouldn't either. But it's great that
you care about your brother. That's the win.
Speaker 1 (46:55):
Eventually, your brother is going to be walking the streets
holding a Tiffany necklace.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
In his hand that she gave back and crying, and
somebody's gonna.
Speaker 4 (47:01):
Say, my bro, well, that's been too cool obs.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
Great job, great job, buddy, too great to be here
in this new space. So we just keep upgrading the pod. Yes,
but folks, please submit video queries, your dilemmas, any issues,
interesting questions you want us to solve anything where you're
about Too Cool Mom's Pod at gmail dot com. Not
to be confused with Jiggy sixty eight seventy five Socks
(47:33):
Forever at gmail dot com.
Speaker 3 (47:35):
Yes, don't want to mix them up. We'll follow our Instagram.
Speaker 1 (47:37):
It's at two Cool Moms Pod and uh yeah, subscribe
to all this stuff.
Speaker 3 (47:42):
We love you.
There was a problem.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
We're taking mud.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
We have done it. We've resumed Two Cool Moms.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
I am Joe Gatto, I am Steve Burn and two
Cool Moms is back.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
We are back, baby.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Hello, how are you? I'll see you.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
It's great to be back in the co pilot chair
with you.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
This is fantastic. Yeah, it's been too long.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Look at the ambiance. Where are we, Joseph.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
This is so beautiful. This is Look. You've got this.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
We've got this. We got here, we got a little
of that.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
This guy's here. These weren't arms. We borrowed these from
somebody that.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Oh you know, you told me, hey, Steve, bring some
things from yes, to decorate the set, bring something significant,
something from home. I toiled with this.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
Oh I did.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
I spent quite a bit of time.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Okay, oh, a fancy for to take a look. Okay,
let's see.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
Let's see now that this is authentic, Yeah, authentic.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Yeah, that's been a fairly family heirloom. Can you take
the tag off? We've had the fair that's a family heirloom.
We've had that in the family guards. Yeah. So my
mom got that when she first came to the States,
obviously years ago.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
Did you want to keep the tag for it then, just.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
In case, I'll return it. Yeah, and we're just like
you know, whatever they see where these go?
Speaker 3 (01:24):
You know? Oh and this was you told me your
grandma that brought this over.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Absolutely, that's what she came over from. That's authentic.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
The price tag. She even get the price tag on it.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Yep.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
I can't believe you paid twallet for this jail.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Keep the receipt please, thank you. And that that's also
here on set.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
Good good, You really dove into the duck theme.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
Now.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Look, I didn't just go in the store and go
to one section. I went through the whole I went
through the whole store. So there we go.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
Okay, and yeah, I got some tick tacks. Yes, in
case you want to stay fresh.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Oh, and that's we're kicking it off.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
There's no receipt. Okay, it's no receipt.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
God damn it. I just want to keep it minty.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Fresh, a MINTI fresh set look good, bring a.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
Good vibe and energy to the room. By the way,
feel free to dig in.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
I uh, I asked you to do one thing.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
You don't.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
You don't schedule it, you don't edit it, you don't
even open the emails.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
I ask you.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Excuse me, I'm speaking.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
I ask you, and I toiled with asking you to
be like, hey, you know what's gonna be a fun set?
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Brings some stuff? Got ya?
Speaker 1 (02:38):
That's what I can open the text. Got ya, that's
what you said. Okay, got ya. So you went We're
in Times Square, obviously, and you went to the Times
Square duck hut.
Speaker 3 (02:49):
I guess the New York duck cut. I'm assuming you
spend forty seven dollars. Uh.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
By the way, not far off forty five really, And
when he was ringing up, I was like, motherfucking But
at the same time, I was thinking, well, this will
be fun.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
For this would be great. It's worth a joke. You
didn't want to did you forget to bring something? Yes?
That was right, right? So okay that's what it was.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Yeah, because I think gotcha. I'm not sure if you know,
but okay. So the night before I flew here, I
was doing my show at Zany's. Yeah, and it's a
CrowdWork show. So I do the series Steve Byrne versus
New York or Nashville, right, Villa will punch up bluff,
it doesn't matter, And so doing the show, and these
(03:32):
guys read Clinch Red Clay Strays. Their tour manager reached
out and said, hey, they're gonna come down. And they're
a phenomenal band, phenomenal country like just root, classic roots,
no production, huge production, just like bass, guitar, drums, vocals.
These guys are amazing. So they come and I'm like excited.
I'm like, oh, it's pretty cool. They're going to spend
(03:55):
their off day coming to see me. This is very flattering.
And then before I got there, and mind you, I
haven't had a drink in a month. I've been keeping
it nice and clean. I'm not vegan, but I've been
keeping it nice and clean and keep it in check.
And then I get a call from Joe DeRosa who's
on a tour bus with Bert Kreischer, and they say
(04:16):
we're coming in tonight, be ready, and be ready means hydrate.
So anytime Bert's around, it just goes off the rail.
So the night just kept happening. Surprise a surprise, I
do my thing. Chris Kirkpatrick from en Sync is there.
I bring him up with Bert or he just came.
He came in and we met at a Steeler's function
(04:37):
well from Pittsburgh.
Speaker 3 (04:38):
Greg. He comes down.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
We sing a country song together on stage, which is hilarious.
It was a lot of fun. And then I do
my set. Chris Kirkpatrick came up for sausage party, and
then I go over the door. I'm like, you guys
want to surprise tonight. I open up the door, I
go des DeRosa comes out, DeRosa introduces Kreischer. Then Kreischer
in use is Nate Barghetsi and now all of us
(05:02):
are on stage together. And the night just took right off.
So we had multiple drinks that evening. I got as
I'm coming home, my flight got bump back, which I
told and then I was like, all right, I'm just
gonna I was gonna pack when I got home. I'll
just pack in the morning. So there's a long story.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
Hence the ducks. Hence the ducks. So the ducks names
of Bert, Joe, and Nate. Yes, that's right.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Yeah, that's the title of this episode. Hence the ducks
hens the ducks. Yeah, So I apologize about that because
you did tell me. And I set aside things in
my office to put my suitcase to bring to decorate.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
I can't wait till next time when you bring everything
or have the excuse story to tell me why you
didn't bring them, because that's likely what's gonna happen.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
But I'm excited about it.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
I actually got the direct Chris Kirkpatrick in a little
short film written by Brian Q quinn and Savakanda Cold
Pinky Poketo Bendido is Dead.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
And I did it in two thousand and four.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Really yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
I flew in because they their director fell off and
they needed somebody. They had everything lined up in the
head Kirkpatrick and they said Joey, you know, and so
I said, off flying home and I did it and
I directed it for them, and I got to direct
Chris Kirkpatrick and Sal and Q in this short film
which we'll never see the light of day. Really, Oh,
it was horrendous. I think it came. I think it's
(06:23):
one of those things that didn't you know, just age weird.
I forgot even what the storyline was. It was on
about like no, it was Q and Sal's and I
think they've put it in the vault somewhere. Q might
have it somewhere. I should talk to him to see
if I'll release it. But it was like they were
on a date and booths together with separate girls, and
something happens when somebody goes to the the girls go
to the bathroom, and then they start fighting with each other.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
A full feud. Yeah, it was funny.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
I just remember, but it was we were young in
our careers and we weren't very savvy seasoned.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Yeah, but uh, it was fun. I remember. I remember that.
I haven't thought of Chris since that.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Yeah, I have weird even during Trolls.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
The trolls.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Yeah, every every kids movie that comes out. You were
at the premiere of it, and I'm like, me and
my kids are just going to go to a normal
movie theater and rubbed shoulders with the stars, all of them.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
Man, I can get you a list.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
That's my favorite thing to do, hands out, going to
movie premiere is my favorite thing.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
And my daughter's got the bug.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Now, best movie premiere you've ever been to? Excluding jokers,
because I'm sure that there's some that was mentality to
serious hated wait that's your your movie is coming out.
Speaker 1 (07:30):
But it was so like the network put us like
in the lobby of an AFC all. It wasn't even
it was just everybody's crammed. We were allowed twelve people each,
like it was so stupid, and my son had COVID,
Like it was just it was like a thing and
this is just yeah, just star pandemic.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
We didn't know it was COVID.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Then you were you were one of the last.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Yeah, my son was the outbreak.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Monkett started the lockdown Nation zero.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
You were you were at the premiere? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
you didn't come.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
Wasn't invited people. I never I never get invited any premieres.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
But premiers are great, I said, I would say my first,
like big one was Wonder Woman, right and what a
which was such a cool one because it was such
a big deal.
Speaker 3 (08:10):
But I remember I've probably had gone.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
To some before that, but I remember Wonder Woman being
one and for my plus one, actually I think I
brought Justin.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
I think Justin was my plus one.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
The kid was our Hey DJ, Hey DJ came out
and he and it was such a really, really cool premiere.
But I had been able to visit that set. I
saw the movie, and then I hung out and met
Patty Jenkins after I had met her before, and then
just met and hung out and had so much fun
at that premiere.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
That was a big one for me.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
I know you guys are friends, yes, yes, great. And
then the other one was Spider Man was unbelievable. Tom
Hollands first Spider Man Wow, which was And those Marvel
ones are are crazy. But I did get to steal
my daughter to go to see Boss Baby two. And
it took her like a date. And she was only
like four, I think when it came out and we
had time to kill right, and so we went and
(08:56):
we got there and because we got into the city earlier,
and we went and had sushi across the street and
I went on like.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
A little date with my daughter. Oh that's great. Really,
Now me and her to do all this sort of
stuff together, which is so fun.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Is she finally or she's obviously old er. Is she
at the age now where she's starting to put it together?
Like this is pretty cool. This is like a lot
of kids don't.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Get to do it.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
He takes the experience and I don't even know if
she's comparing herselves with other kids, but she takes the
experiences in which is great. Like we're going to Columbus,
Ohio in two days ago see AJR the AJR brother
Concert Oh that's great.
Speaker 3 (09:25):
Yeah, because I was supposed to.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
Go here in Connecticut and I had to have hernia
surgery and I wasn't up to par to travel just
me and her.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
So I was like, all right.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
I was like, I'm not gonna be jumping around this
concert three days after getting stitched up in the bellies
and I was like, I'm fresh. I still got this,
you know, I guess still got the stitch in. And
I was like, I can't do it. So we're going
and I'm actually flying with her. We're gonna go stay
over in Columbus and then go to the concert.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
And do you remember the last show we did together?
Speaker 3 (09:51):
Oh so funny.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
You were wrap old Joe Gaddle comedy tour. I couldn't
believe you even did these shows. People don't understand you
were in serious pain prior to and as soon as
you were done with the show. You're the most jovial
human being. Nobody hides. You're so good at compartmentalizing. Yeah,
you could have a devastating personal thing happened to you
(10:16):
and nobody would ever know. And you know, every show
we'd ever do, you'd walk in. You're gracious to security,
You're gracious to the people, run in the house, the
sound guy, whatever. You're so kind and sweet. That was
the only time I ever saw you where you were
like as soon as the show was over, you got back,
you pulled your pants down, get an ice bag. You
(10:36):
look miserable. And I took a picture of you into
the scale. One of my favorite pictures I've ever had
of you, because it's because you're looking dead at me,
but you're so honest. It's just like, I've never seen
him like this.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
You know what, the worst you have, the show you have,
the you have.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
That's so funny because you sent me we should put
up aside by side of the picture. After my first
set ever, Oh yeah, dad was not a comedy, right,
I did it And.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
It's from Appleton, Wisconsin, because you're with me.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
And then the last show, Yeah, and I look withered.
I look I was at the first one. I'm like,
I did it, and the seconde like I did it.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
I just got out.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
But it's interesting because you know, you take a picture
some of you, Oh you just you know, most people
just smile. You put on a smile in that picture. Though,
backstage in Wisconsin, that picture I did capture it's not
just you smiling. You can see there's some resonance of
like pride in it. Yeah, you took forty five minutes
on stage for the first time ever going solo. And
(11:33):
there's a different smile in that picture. Because we've got
thousands of pictures together on tour.
Speaker 3 (11:38):
That but the crown in the other.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
My god, but to be there for the first and
then the last, I got to put those side. I'll
send them to you. Ye oh, my god, they're great.
Speaker 3 (11:47):
It's so bad. So you can see it on me. No,
theres no hide in it.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
It was so funny because we didn't even have if
you I don't know if you remember, we didn't have
an ice pack.
Speaker 3 (11:56):
So Shae was with us and I said, Shay, she goes,
what do you mean?
Speaker 1 (11:59):
I say, I say, need ice, And she just went
we had done the shopping right whether she went and
got like the snacks of the green room and she
had a plastic bag and she went and asked him
that had ice, And she cracked ice trays into the
plastic bag from like shop right or whatever it was.
And I just saw a plastic bag of house ice inside.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
My hates.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Great show biz.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Oh that's biz. That's a biz.
Speaker 4 (12:23):
Baby.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
I was driving here and I thought of something and
that it was interesting because I was like, I've never
seen this, I've never done this, and I wanted to
ask you. I saw a girl crossing the stree where
I'm sitting in traffic in New York City, right. I
saw a girl across the street and she was just
full blown crying in public, crossing the street by herself,
and I was like, Oh, that woman's going through a lot.
I was like, but also like, I don't know anything's
(12:46):
ever happened to me that I would just continue my
day and be.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Crying, like in my commute and just walking.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
She wasn't even on the phone riding, she was just
crying walking yeah, and pardon me. Wanted to be like, oh,
I should ask her if she needs anything. So my
question for you is, if you're that person that's crying
in the street, do you want a stranger to.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Come up to you and be like, Hey, what's the matter,
or are you like, leave me the hell alone.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
I would assume that person's like leave me, leave me
the hell alone, because obviously, if it's tapping into something
that's resonant within your soul. That's that's bringing up that emotion.
It's so personal, right, and you don't want somebody you
have a complete stranger. And here's the thing about like
in New York City, if she's hot, like every guy
(13:26):
in the city's gonna be like, hey, you need some
you know, And if you're not, it's just like she's
just crying, which is which is sad because it's still
just a human being that's going through something. But I
think that's the instant natural thought that a guy would
have in a joking kind of way. But have you
ever I wouldn't want to bother someone, but you have
such a you break barriers immediately. So I think that
(13:49):
full shot a shop. First off, a complete stranger coming
up to you and you're crying and going, hey are
you okay? You'd be like wait what, But then you
add the second layer, which you're so used to they
put it together. It's Joe Gatto, What the fuck is
going on here? Right?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
Did you say anything?
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Or no?
Speaker 3 (14:04):
No? I was driving and she was walking, so I
was made things.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
But then I was like, I don't know if I've
ever had and I've been through some stuff, but I
don't think I've ever had a walking crying thing?
Speaker 3 (14:13):
Have you ever had a walking crying thing? I actually
just remembered it.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Have you ever been in public and just started crying?
And I just remembered I had a walking crying thing
in Manhattan.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
I just remembered it.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Now.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
I was like, oh, I would I would never do that,
but I did.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
I was seeing a girl and I had just moved
back from la This is two thousand and five, and
we had gotten together and I put together this whole thing,
and I had gotten a hotel room and we went
to see a play or whatever, and I went to
Tiffany's and I had bought like the standard do you remember,
like back in the day, there was that heart right
that everybody you got, verybody I bought and then I
you know, we we spent the night together in the
(14:47):
hotel and then I gave it to her and she
just was like, I can't accept this.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
It's I don't think we could be together. And I
was like, and I.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Sing, you guys hung out the night?
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Did yeah?
Speaker 1 (14:56):
And I started crying. She had just started seeing somebody.
I think it was something and I had start because
I just.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
Moved back from laure and she and I.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
Had started crying and I was singing, Oh God, I
was singing my.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Girl, Oh my God, thank you. I quit. I don't
know this person. I don't know this person. This is
a stranger. Show me your identification. I don't know you.
You were singing my girl in the.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
And then I had to walk to get my car,
and I was crying still waiting in the vallet.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
I'm just remembering. I was this woman.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Here's what's gonna happen.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
Nobody asked me if I was okay.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
As soon as we're done taping, you can see a
half Asian crying walking to DeRosa's apartment going I can't
believe in Prontal with that. I did see. I did
see a woman cry one time in the street walking
and I did. I did approach because great, I see
that appening. You have you have therapist vibes. Well, I
was in my young twenty you know, you don't know
any better. So I was just like, oh, that's somebody's
(15:58):
in need.
Speaker 3 (15:58):
I go over.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
I go, mister, you do you need anything? She goes,
I'm okay. I'm like, okay, if you need anything, just
I'm right here. She's like I just came from a
show called Fresh Towels.
Speaker 5 (16:07):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
I'm sorry, that's your I just put that together.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
Tickets available, Ticket's always available. We got Jiggy with this.
Now we have a jiggycam, which is amazing. Mark your guards.
Speaker 5 (16:33):
You're always on a mic too. I got so much
flak on tour, like get a mic for the show.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
Yeah yes, but now people can visually see you. And
my favorite line, my favorite line when I go on
tour with you guys is my opening line. You know,
I love it. It's my favorite line. I go ladies
and gentlemen. How about it for Jiggy? Keep up with
him on social media and that's Jiggy spell with an N.
Speaker 3 (16:59):
And my fit part is that normally there's two people
like that in the audience at LAM and he goes ah,
they get it.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
I you know, Marked your Guardian is now officially signed
up for my new tour. I don't know if you
saw the artwork. It's the let's get into a tour
my new tour with Joe Gallice. Well you're there, but
then Marked your Guardian, Yeah, Mark, Mark's big deal.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Maybe be size eight nine. I pumped up to a
nine because your name.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
Is so long, it's a crazy name. I still don't
know how to spell it. Yeah, I've been friends with
you for quite a few years now, and I still
have no idea.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
I don't I know if I know your middle name Edward. Oh, Edward,
that's right. Mark.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
It took me a year to learn to even know
how to say it Edward. I mean, uh Ji, Guardian.
It took me forever to put it all together. I
was like, I don't know how to say it, so
I just said, fuck it, I'm not gonna I'm not
gonna learn it.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
He also has forty seven emails that are still active.
I don't know if you it all so and I type,
I just type J I g in my like to say,
like emails.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
I'm not even kidding. There's like nine emails.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Coming back, a lot of email.
Speaker 5 (18:06):
I am very consistent with keeping Gmail, but I have
like five different Gmail against you know, over the years.
You're like, but they're dating by I've.
Speaker 2 (18:16):
Had the same email forever.
Speaker 3 (18:18):
I just had.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
I just did this thing where I signed the emails
for my children because we got an Apple Watches and
you had to send their iCloud. And I was like
this is going to be their email for life, like
thinking that, but I they could easily change it. But
I'm like, this is a big moment, right, So I
had some fun ones lined up and my wife was like, no,
we're gonna use the name idiot, not gonna be silly
Hampster twenty two.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
Cloud dot crop.
Speaker 5 (18:42):
You have numbers in your in your email, which is
like a very Aol move of yeah, like that's very amateur, amateur.
Speaker 3 (18:49):
Well that's because there's a lot of Steve. There's a
lot of Steve Burns.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
It's me blues clothes.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
Mark your guardian. I guess that's fair.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
But I marked your guardian one and no one would
be like there's no two?
Speaker 3 (19:02):
Why yeah, why.
Speaker 5 (19:03):
Why stop giving away my emails? There's Mark Georgent one,
two three. I have seven of.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
Them, seven emails and still tickets available. That's how pathetic
it is. My son, by the way, is tapped into something.
He you know when you got timing, right, you get timing.
My son the other day, he uh, he leaves his
cereal milk on the table all the time. I go,
can't grab your milk, put in the sink and pour
(19:30):
the milk out. I've told you a thousand times, go
do it now. And he picks up his bowl milk
and he looks at me and just goes.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
I've been up bed boy.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
And I fucking lost it, dude. I just bent over
and I just kept crying laughing. And now he knows,
he knows that's the thing. So I heard my wife
yelling at it.
Speaker 3 (19:53):
Cat, I told you stop putting the towels on the ground.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
It's got to dry.
Speaker 3 (19:56):
Poke it on the hook.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
And I just hear I've been up be Oh my god,
it is just brilliant to pull that out of the
eighth after seeing it on a Looney Tunes cartoon. Oh
my god, it's so funny. The best being a dad
is best, So the best.
Speaker 3 (20:15):
That's great, man.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
But we are two cool moms and we're here to help.
We're here to help. I want to ask you a
quick question. Okay, do you remember that Kansas City chiefs kicker.
Speaker 3 (20:23):
He was Frank Dogado.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Oh I forget. He was in the news like a
month ago, and this made like the rounds, and there
were people that are furious at him. But he was
basically saying, you know, he was He was speaking at
a Catholic university. He's Catholic, obviously, and he was saying,
the greatest job a woman can to have is being
a mother and a wife. And he was explaining that
(20:47):
and then he said, you know, I'm here with the Chiefs.
You know, I won a super Bowl, but the greatest
job I've ever had is being a father and a husband.
And I was thinking, and when you hear it in context,
I was like, absolutely, you know, I've I'm a comedian,
I've done fun things most people would.
Speaker 3 (21:05):
Be countless films, television shows, countless can take it, still
ail ticket, still a al punch up live.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
But I was listening to him and I'm like, this
guy professionally has has hit the crescendo.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
Right.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
He's on an air defining team, he's a kicker, he's
got a Super Bowl ring maybe one or I think two,
maybe the peak of his profession. And he's still saying,
take us out all that being a father and a
husband is the greatest job in the world. And I
was like, yeah, that I agree with that, and I
think my wife would agree with her greatest role as
(21:38):
being a wife and a mother. And it got taken
out of count and just it turned into a news story,
you know, And I was just curious if you had
come across or anything just as a parent. I think
anybody who's a parent could could hear that and hear
it and go yeah, one hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (21:54):
Yeah, well you know that the the title of that
probably didn't say all that. You just said that's why.
So that's why people get in feared, right. The title
of the news story wasn't yeah, explained to that one.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
It was his picture and he's blown off on Twitter,
like he tells he's basically telling women to get in
a to make a sandwich. And it was like, I
thought it was actually a really sweet sentiment.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
I think it's insightful if you're if you are, especially
if you've concentrated a lot on your career like I had,
and then shift your focus back to fatherhood and then
realize the benefits of both. And I was like, you know,
so I think that's that's a valid point. I would say,
you know, fatherhood is probably the most rewarding thing.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Sure, yeah, even more than you know.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
It's hard because like you think about everything that you've
done and all that you've achieved, and I think that
even if I can't eve imagine because we do like
our jobs.
Speaker 3 (22:41):
But I can't even imagine people like that hate their jobs. Right,
and then they're like.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
But at least I get to be a father, right,
because there's that side of the coin too.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
Of course, people like that's the only enjoyment they get.
You know, imagine if you if you go for two
I mention if you hate kids and you're a real
dumb fuck kid, just and like, daddy, I want to
eat chalk. You're like, shut up.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Just banging his head and he's like, you know, he's like,
I've been a ben boy.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
I really had.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
He's not doing he's not doing it with he's not
doing it with comedic timing. He's just been like I've
been whoa, whoa she has a bow and arrow.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
Yeah, like it could be that could be like a
they're over to this.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
Oh man, that's in existence. Nobody wants.
Speaker 2 (23:24):
No, those people end up on dateline, yeah for sure. Yeah,
it's always the hut.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
And then they become famous.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
That's right.
Speaker 3 (23:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Well we're here to help, right, We're here to help,
and that's as as two fathers, we once again have
given been given great maternal advice from our moms, and
we're here to help you guys. So before we kick
it off, two cool moms. Pod at Gmail is where
you send all of your queries, an your dilemmas. You
can even send us a video.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Now we're going to video submissions, video submission, say, you
can send us a video as well.
Speaker 3 (23:55):
We're really updating everything here.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
It's we're pumped. We weren't coach before. I wouldn't even
say that. When we first started, we were with Spirit Yeah,
and now we're Delta in the executive lounge.
Speaker 3 (24:07):
Comfort plus comfortless. Yeah. Okta.
Speaker 2 (24:10):
Here we.
Speaker 5 (24:12):
Head to the first question. All right, this one comes from.
Speaker 3 (24:15):
Also Yes, I'm sorry, who's speaking this is?
Speaker 5 (24:19):
This is Jiggy kadd.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Pat and bending.
Speaker 5 (24:23):
All right, so this one comes from Alex who hit
us on the Instagram. Good evening, Cool Mommy's my name
is Alex. I'm in the Air Force, so he's in the.
Speaker 3 (24:30):
He's thank you for I have to say that, right, yeah,
yeah yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
Out of all of them, they get to fly around,
did the best, they get treated the best, but thank
you for your service.
Speaker 5 (24:39):
My wife is afraid when I get out of the
Air Force and become an airline pilot that I'm going
to be gone for long stretches of time. How do
I calm her nerves for being gone for about fifteen
to twenty days a month. Thanks for the help and
love you both.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
Yeah, nobody's going to be shooting at you, honey, like
nobody's gonna be trying to take my plane down and
will active war.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
So that's the plus. I guess you start with the
pluses pluses.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
Here's the negatives. I would just start sending pictures of
hot stewardesses. Don't worry, I'll be well to take care
of Jetty gets hungry on the road.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
All right, it's seriousness, let's see.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
So well, the biggest thing is a career change, right,
so you're gonna you have to deal with that, which
is what we've been through.
Speaker 3 (25:22):
I'm sure stretches the time apart is tough.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
So you're just gonna have to make sure that the
time together is spent together, or that you're in the
moment while you're there. I think that was a pitfall
I had had at one point, was when you were present,
you were there, but you weren't you know, there physically,
and you're not there emotionally or mentally, or you know,
just be there in the moment.
Speaker 3 (25:44):
That's going to be the most important thing. I think.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
Yes, two guys that travel a lot, we've had discussions
about this as well. And you've lost a lot of weight. Yeah,
you normally would like push that. You can't even push
it out to be funny. No, not. You look fantastic,
Thank you, But I appreciate that.
Speaker 3 (26:02):
What the hell is that has to do with day
for Sorry?
Speaker 2 (26:03):
Sorry, I was just looking at it. I was like, wow,
you look great.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
You don't look like an airline carrier anymore.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
But no, I agree with you. That was something you
had said. And Billy Gardell, a good friend of mine,
told me years ago. He's like, because you had mentioned it,
you know about everything whatever. You've been pretty public about things. Yeah,
you know to a degree. But but like when you're home,
be home, and like I make sure to spend as
much time as I can with my children, but I
also do everything I can to be like, all right,
(26:31):
just why don't you and I go to lunch today,
or let's let you and I take a walk and
just you know, feed the security for her because those
days that I am gone, you know, she's by herself.
She's spinning so many plates. And also you know, there's
I'm working in Vegas all the time, I'm boozing it up.
I'm out till three or four in the morning, so
I'm still checking in with her, But I want to
(26:52):
do everything I can to provide her with a sense
of security. That's this relationship that you're attacked.
Speaker 1 (26:57):
I think you neverled it on the head because insecurity
definitely creeps into when time's apart on both sides of it,
Like when I'm away and like if I call and
she doesn't pick up the phone, like I'm like, what's
what's happening?
Speaker 3 (27:08):
What's going on? Or I'm like, you know, what is
everybody okay? It's like, you know that's addiblely you go
through the houses on fire, the dogs bright and everybody right,
you know.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
But I think that's that's a part of it too.
So to help blanket all that and bubb will wrap
those moments. It's like to make sure the time spent
together is reassuring there's love there and and you feel
like you have a partner in the moment.
Speaker 2 (27:30):
Yeah, security, I think is the insecurity is what is
where I think trouble stem from. Right the minute, it's
just like there's question there's whatever. I don't know why
I'm thinking about. Billy Gardell one time told me a
plumber came to his house one time and he and
it's during the day and he's like, oh, we've got
a plumber. I didn't know we have a plumber. I
guess there's some issue. There was an issue, and it
(27:52):
was like five grand with the plumbing stuff. Okay and
uh and and he said the guy was kind of
good looking, you know. He comes in, it's a good
looking plumber. He writes a check for five grand, and
his wife is kind of like a little twinkle in
the eye. He's like, Okay, that was weird. And they're
like three weeks later, he's coming home and he sees
the plumber and he goes, five grand. Please tell me
(28:12):
my wife that's great. Rather but to the to the
to Alex, I believe the Air Force pilot a thank
you so much for for what you do. And then
as two frequent flyers, thank you very much for keeping
(28:35):
us safe in the skies, especially with all these crazy
videos you see. Sure of everybody on the airlines, I've
never seen an incident like that happen, but I'm sure
it must be a common occurrence because it's always in
the new stuff.
Speaker 3 (28:45):
For as much as we fly, I've never seen it back.
I never had one.
Speaker 2 (28:47):
Hup, Yeah, never seen it.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
Oh we said it out loud though. Now watching Forget
it's gonna be awesome. Yeah, yeah, for sure. And you're
flying next, so let me know, get back to Nashville.
How that goes. Yeah, I would just say, spend time
together and uh, you know, re sure. And also be
in touch when you're on the road. Yes, be in
touch on when you're on the road, that's very important.
Speaker 3 (29:05):
Be able well out.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Don't answer while you're flying, put it on the do
not to stare it while you're in the air. But
because you don't want to, you don't want to come
over yell you about the life.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
But don't they just flip in an autopilot. That's what
I hear they do now because the computers are so good,
they're there to help ascend problem. But once you're up there,
you just kind of flip a switch and you're just
kind of yeah, but what do you think they're doing?
Speaker 1 (29:25):
End I'm playing angry birds like they look at beat
boops and things.
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Yeah, they gotta make sure you get it. The beatpoops
and all right, yeah, all right.
Speaker 5 (29:37):
Next question comes from Celeste. She says she believes that
honesty is always the best policy, but I'm not sure
people always want to hear the truth. If you ask
me a question, I'm going to give you a totally answered,
honest answer. Is there any time when honesty is not
the best policy?
Speaker 2 (29:55):
Well, I'll tell you this right now, there is not
a human being on the planet that is better at
being honest than you. You are, so you cut to
the bone so quick, there's no bs and around you.
I and there's another good friend, a mutual friend of
Vince Vaughn. He's the same way. He just let's get
(30:15):
to the truth right now, what is the truth? And
I will tell you the truth, so we're not sugarcoat
in this and bullshit. And those friends I feel are
better to have than the one that kind of pussy
foots around it and is going to be sweet and kind.
Yeah right, And then it takes you like four weeks
or even four years later to go, why didn't you
ever say anything? You know, I think those of the situation,
(30:38):
the paradigm of that relationship. I'd prefer to have the
blunt force instrument as opposed to the sugar coated you
know friend what is That's that's what I really appreciate
about your friendship. So you are as honest as the
day is long.
Speaker 3 (30:52):
Yeah, but I don't know how how you took to
it in the beginning.
Speaker 1 (30:55):
And I love the freesture for you too, because you
and I, you know, we established a friendship for real
after like we were just we were friendly and whatever.
But you and I we're righty to die now. But
you in the beginning, I don't know if you knew
how to take I like it though, yeah, because I
think I think you got there because they're like, oh,
that's just how he Oh, that's how he is. Like yeah,
(31:15):
I think it's It's interesting, right, I think it's interesting.
You have to you know, there are levels of honesty
with you are with different people, Like I'm very honest
with you, very honest with the boys.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
You know. I'm honest with you.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
You know, I have other friends that I'm honest with,
but maybe like I won't say as much sure or
as quickly, you know, right, I think there are But
I do think always honesty is is pretty it is important,
but also not at the expense of people's feelings, and
I think that's where the blawings get blurred.
Speaker 2 (31:50):
You're you're a very emotional, intelligent person, Like there have
been one or two times where I may have said
something on stage or went went the wrong way. And
you're you're a leader. You're smart enough. You've been in
situations where you're leading where you you just say, hey,
can I talk to you for a second, and you
you're you're smart enough to go, let's not do this
in front of everybody. Yeah, no, need to Let's do
(32:12):
it here. You know, some people want a grandstand. Some
people want to like, hey, I'm going to go around
and stuff. It's just like it's ridiculous. So I you know,
something is easy, Hey, where do you want to go eat?
I don't care, let's go. You're like, you know, if
I say, hey, let's go at sushi, I don't want sushi,
It's like okay, we know, because you could end up
with somebody who didn't really want sushi, but they're gonna
sit there and they go along with it. It's like I
(32:33):
didn't really want to go. Well, why didn't you say anything?
Speaker 3 (32:35):
You know?
Speaker 2 (32:36):
And I think that's that's why I prefer to have
somebody who's right there so you understand the dynamic and
now there's no there's no hard feelings one hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
I think there's certain things where the number one thing
if your feelings get hurt, say something, because no one
knows how you're feeling unless you say it. You could
and then you get yourself upset because like, well they
should know I'm upset. They don't, So let them know
the way that they're definitely gonna know you're upset and
have a chance to correct something.
Speaker 3 (33:02):
Right, And we've had this conversation a bunch.
Speaker 1 (33:03):
Is like, if you say it to them, they know
you're taking out off the table.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
The people not knowing because you drive yourself crazy.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Right You're like, oh, I wish they you know, I
wish they knew, Well why don't Why don't they know?
Speaker 3 (33:15):
Because they just they don't know, right, you know?
Speaker 1 (33:17):
So I think that's a big when when honesty comes
into play, Be honest about how you're feeling to people.
Speaker 3 (33:22):
I think that's number one.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
And people can't handle it, then they just maybe it's
not supposed maybe it's not for you, But.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
I've come to you for advice. You recently I called
you about a situation where a friend of mine and
you know, again, it's just like that person thinks differently
than you. Isn't that amazing? It's like, oh yeah, yeah,
of course they operate differently. So it was, you know,
it's good to get those reminders of a different perspective
at times. But but I believe you are one hundred
(33:49):
percent correct. Honestly, is the best policy. And it's something
even with my wife, I think we're I.
Speaker 3 (33:55):
Was just gonna ask you, would you tell jess Youdan
like her outfit?
Speaker 2 (33:59):
There have been occasions without her prompting it. She always asked, though,
She's like, do you like this or this? I'm like,
I like that? God, you know, because I just know,
you know, but half the time I don't care.
Speaker 3 (34:10):
Me and Bessie just.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
Went to a gala, uh two nights ago, I think
it was, and and she was like, and she just
had and I went, oh, no, not for you, and
she started laughing. She goes and then she goes, yeah
I didn't. I wasn't sure. Oh I'm sure this is
not a good dress.
Speaker 3 (34:25):
We gotta try someone else. We got, I said, what else?
We got in the hopper and that was what she.
Speaker 1 (34:29):
I mean, because we've been together so long, she gets it.
But the same thing with me, Like she'll be like
those shoes. But I think I bring that out in
her because we allow it, Like we allow the honesty
in her house.
Speaker 3 (34:39):
And even my daughter and son. I see them now.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
My daughter, like she'll get dressed and she'll like, you
know how everybody's like, look how perfect my little princess
and whatever? You know, my doos got great style. She
just loves it. And she'll be like that and I'll
be like, I was like, is that the jacket we're
gonna go with? And she's like, I have another one?
Should wear that one?
Speaker 3 (34:55):
Like she like talking about it, like look how pretty
my princess is. You know.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
It's like, you know, you want to show them that
there's options and different things.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
It's not like you're not going to hit home run
every time.
Speaker 2 (35:04):
But it's great again to go back to security. Your
daughter has security. She's cure in herself, and I think
that's so important. The other day, I was walk up
with my son somewhere and I was ribbing him. I
was just giving it to him, you know, in like
a funny way, like I was saying something about something
he'd like his appearance, and he just laughed it off,
and he laughed along with the joke instead of being like,
(35:26):
do you really not like that? And I was like
in that moment, I was like, I didn't realize until
he was laughing, but I was like, am I being
a little hard on him? But then I was like,
he's rolling with it. He's so confident in himself. He's
laughing at it. He's not saying, Daddy, you hurt my
feelings or something like that. And I just thought, boy,
that's a great what a great trait that is, and
(35:46):
something I wouldn't have even thought about or put together
unless I had that moment, you know.
Speaker 3 (35:51):
The best thing to do is like, like, I'll get that.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Like with the jacket thing, she was like, she's like,
she's like, should I wear this jacket?
Speaker 4 (35:57):
This?
Speaker 3 (35:57):
Check? I said, what, Jack, do you think you were right?
I'm not going to tell with the way, what do
you want? Which one do you think you like better? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (36:01):
And then she'll put that one on and she's she's like,
how does it look? I said, do you like it?
Speaker 3 (36:04):
Like? That's it? Like?
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Yeah, great, good, let's go what makes you feel better.
Speaker 3 (36:08):
Yeah, yeah, it doesn't. I would have put the other jacket.
She looked like shit, but I'm not going to say that.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
So I was like, you know, you picked that jacket,
you picked the wrong one. We're going to go out
in public with it this.
Speaker 2 (36:17):
I'm We've been to so many restaurants, right, so many restaurants.
The water's like, how's the food? Jes like, that's okay,
I know, don't ask me. It's I've never seen anything
like it, like like and then they go okay. But
like most people I think would just be playing, go
it's great, thank you so much, and you go back
to it. It's like it kind of sucks, but you
will always always always be honest.
Speaker 3 (36:39):
Well I'm not in polite.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
You're never like, hey, listen, this was great, but the
mashed potatoes they were a mess.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
Yeah yeah. You know, there's been desserts that have come
to our table, like, hey, how was the cheesecake and
they're so proud of which I was like, it was okay, Yeah, it.
Speaker 3 (36:51):
Was okay, you know, but you know what, the sherbet
was fantastic or.
Speaker 2 (36:55):
I don't like it. Yeah, one bite into a meal,
I don't like it. Give me something else to take this. Yeah,
I mean most people picture this. I just I'm not
gonna put myself.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
Through eating this. Give me the penny, you know.
Speaker 1 (37:05):
I'm not gonna sit here and be like, oh I
should have got the penne No, I'll get the Yeah,
I'm not gonna do it.
Speaker 3 (37:10):
Why life's too short. I got honoies to clog get
into it.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
But it is one hundred percent the way to live
if you can. I can't bring myself to be as
confident as you are to be that honest. But but
I'm telling you, you just you you shortcut so many
other things. People know from the jump this this is
gonna be what he wants to get this done. Otherwise
you know, you're just wasting time.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
I will say honesty is a great policy, but also
be mindful of people's feelings. Yes, don't be mean about it,
like if you know it's like you know.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
These people like, I'm just honest. If you can't take it,
you can't take it. That's not my approach.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
I'm not like right right right, because I don't put
myself in situations where I'm just like, oh, you look,
you're so stupid.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
Like I'm just being honest.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
You're stupid, right, Like, that's not for something that doesn't
help anybody.
Speaker 3 (37:54):
That's not right, right. You know, I could think you're
stupid and you wouldn't even know it ever, But I wasn't.
I was just looking to you for the next question.
Don't be so stupid. I love you.
Speaker 5 (38:17):
All right, we'll have to we'll do a fun question.
Speaker 2 (38:18):
This one's a fun one.
Speaker 5 (38:19):
This one's from Yeah, these are all This one's from Grace,
which is particularly fun. I don't know if this is
a question from the internet, but I loved it. Uh
Is the kool aid man the jar or the juice?
Speaker 3 (38:31):
Oh? Oh yeah, that's a great question.
Speaker 4 (38:37):
Night.
Speaker 2 (38:39):
He's got to be the jar.
Speaker 3 (38:40):
He's gotta be the jar. So you're just saying, if
you pour out the kool aid, is he dead? Is
he got empty? Is he an empty boss?
Speaker 5 (38:46):
Is he talking from within the jar? Or is he
the jar himself?
Speaker 2 (38:50):
He's like he's like Frosty. He's like frost Frosty.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
Melts right, There's no, he's a puddle. The puddle's not
talking to you, so he's not.
Speaker 2 (38:59):
This is a quest.
Speaker 3 (39:00):
Okay, So that's a great that's the right way to
go down it.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
So if the frosty the snowman melts, the puddle's not
talking to you.
Speaker 3 (39:06):
The snowman is gone.
Speaker 2 (39:07):
He's gone.
Speaker 3 (39:07):
Got it. So now if the juice gets poured out,
he's gone. He's gone.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
That's what I would. So he's the jew And then
I thought that the jar is him because he's got
hands and legs. Right, he's got it. Does he have
a little spoon, Well.
Speaker 5 (39:19):
Here's that when he comes when he blasts the wall. Yeah,
but when he blasts through the wall, his face doesn't
juggle in the in the juice. Yeah, if he was
the juice, he with his face would juggle a round.
Speaker 2 (39:29):
Wait, all that all that mortar and brickshit was that
would get in there too. I'd be like, you gotta
clean it. You can't drink that cool Yeah, you can't
drink it. Nobody's drinking that cool aid.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
I don't care how big the cult is you if
you're if you take the kool aid man and you
grab him by his grabbed by the scuff of his neck,
and you tilt him over like a teapot and pour
everything out, is a kool aid man and you stand
it back up?
Speaker 3 (39:48):
Does the jaw go? Why do you do that, does
the puddle go? Why am I out here? That's that's
the conundrum.
Speaker 5 (39:55):
It's a real conundrum.
Speaker 2 (39:56):
I think it's gotta I think I'm going I'm going
with my Frosty thesis.
Speaker 3 (40:00):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (40:00):
I think if Frosty meltz, there's no Frosty. And I
think if the kool Aid is drunk, he's kool Aid,
he's kool Aid.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
It's kool Aid man.
Speaker 2 (40:09):
It's the it's it's the product. Right, he is the
kool Aid. He's not there to sell you a jar.
He's there to sell you the powdery.
Speaker 3 (40:18):
So you are equating the vase to the magic hat, right,
because if he's in the vase, he becomes alive to
become this person.
Speaker 1 (40:26):
So once to put a Frosty the cap on a snowman,
he becomes Frosty the snowman. So if you take the
hat off, Frosty unfrostified. And if you break the vase,
cool Aid's dead. So I would say, I think we're
all We're all on team.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
It's the kool Aid.
Speaker 5 (40:40):
What do you think I always thought it was a jar.
Speaker 2 (40:43):
Oh, so you're on the opposite side of the fence here.
Speaker 5 (40:45):
I think it's the jar because the face does he move?
Speaker 2 (40:48):
Yeah, you're dumb.
Speaker 5 (40:49):
The face doesn't move, like every time he walks, his
face doesn't.
Speaker 3 (40:52):
I see. I get the nou sloshing thing.
Speaker 5 (40:55):
I think that the kool Aid creates the man within
the jar.
Speaker 3 (40:59):
The kool Aid is the man in the jar. It
needs to be in the jar though, so there won
the symbiotic.
Speaker 5 (41:04):
I think biotic thing. Okay, I think the jar comes alive.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
Get out.
Speaker 5 (41:08):
It comes alive with the Jews.
Speaker 2 (41:10):
Dude, I mean there's there's a part of that frosty element. Then, yeah,
that's the analogy. But you're on the other side of it.
Speaker 3 (41:16):
Yeah, you're you went you went left?
Speaker 1 (41:18):
Okay, Well, you know, we don't want to be devisive
here on two cool moms and Jiggy.
Speaker 3 (41:21):
Apparently it's cool.
Speaker 2 (41:23):
You're also mega you want the pizza hat on instead
Pizza Gate.
Speaker 5 (41:30):
We had time for one more.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
By the way, Jiggy is the only comic I know
that always wears his own merch. It's a cool hat though,
that's the Well, that's why, that's why I like that hat. Yeah,
I really do like that hat, and I still have mine.
But it's the white with the it's the white with
the black mesh and the I wear other.
Speaker 3 (41:46):
I wear other people's march all the time. Do you
I love that? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (41:49):
I do that. You and sal do that a lot.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
Yeah, I mean I like I like to promote other
people's stuff, and I also like to be comfy.
Speaker 2 (41:55):
Well, I'm I'm promoting this uh little known band called Oasis.
Speaker 3 (41:58):
Oh, I thought you were talking about you promote you
promote the desert. You're like, I love the Sahara.
Speaker 2 (42:09):
We're these guys pretty awesome.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
Okay, well more.
Speaker 5 (42:13):
Final question comes from Brandon from the Instagram says, my
brother is dating a girl that's clearly manipulating him, and
my parents won't do anything about it. What should I do?
Speaker 3 (42:24):
Oh? That's tough.
Speaker 1 (42:26):
Uh So he's got his brother's got a girl and
he doesn't like it, basically doesn't like it, doesn't like
the way that's going into you know, other people's business
is tough, though.
Speaker 3 (42:39):
Manipulating the parents though, that's how.
Speaker 5 (42:41):
I think I read it with the wrong emphasis. Girl
the girl dating girl is clearly manipulating him, and my
parents won't do anything about it.
Speaker 2 (42:51):
Oh, gotcha?
Speaker 3 (42:52):
So that changes the whole question. You want to try again? Yes,
try it again, jig Hey.
Speaker 2 (42:56):
Dumb, dumb.
Speaker 5 (42:57):
My brother's dating girl that's clearly manipulating him, period, and
my parents won't do anything about it.
Speaker 3 (43:02):
Oh, inflection changes the question.
Speaker 1 (43:04):
He's waiting for the parents to do something about it,
got it. He should be waiting for the brother to
do something. Hey, dude, what's his name again?
Speaker 3 (43:10):
Brandon?
Speaker 2 (43:11):
Hey Brandon? Why don't you get laid and not worry
about it? Dude, whyn't you stop being jealous of your
brother because he's crushing ass? Oh? Yeah, you want a
fresh one from your older brother or from uncle Stevie.
Hit the streets, find a girl, go to Dave and
Buster's at Happy hour, make it happen.
Speaker 3 (43:26):
Christ lose to for one ski Bols.
Speaker 2 (43:29):
No, he's looking up for his bro. That's really sweet.
Speaker 3 (43:31):
That is sweet. But I mean that's the to your pointers.
You can't do it. You can't do it.
Speaker 1 (43:35):
I mean, I didn't you know, if you don't like somebody,
they end up, you know, getting married, having kids. You're
the godfather of this kid that you hate, this hateful child.
Speaker 3 (43:41):
I mean, you know you know that's it. I mean,
it could be it could be a very nasty road. Yeah,
you know what you know.
Speaker 1 (43:46):
Then all of a sudden, you know, he gets sick,
passes away, and now you got take care of the
wife because she's got an injury from the big accident
they were in.
Speaker 3 (43:53):
Her legs don't work, and now you're pushing the wheelchair.
Speaker 1 (43:56):
And now you're stuck with this woman that you were like,
I didn't like you back in the you know, twenty
year five years ago.
Speaker 3 (44:02):
That could be tough. You don't want to put yourself
in that situation.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
Why on your business you really paint a picture? I'll
tell you, because that's the thing that can happen. Let's
say HM and a girl, they get together, they get married, Okay,
and now that's the end of life. All this is
the in law. You go and you spend the holidays
and you want to Thanksgiving passed me the turkey. We
don't eat turkey. We need toe furkey. We're trying to
say the turkey. So fuck you, bitch, I want turkey.
You can't have turkey. You ruin in my life. You
say all this at Thanksgiving, you walk out, you don't
talk for twelve years. Your brother has a devastating accident,
(44:27):
he ends up passing away, and now that. She's like,
you know, I, if you ever want to see your
nephew again, you're gonna come and have te furkey. And
he's like, ah, fine, I have t Ferky. You go
there and have toll ferk. You get locked in the house,
it gets taken over by strangers, and now you're in
a hostage situation.
Speaker 3 (44:40):
The only way to save our life is to kill
the nephew.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
Now you kill the nephew, and now you have to
marry the wife.
Speaker 3 (44:46):
And now she's your wife. And now if you said
something twenty five years ago, she would hold that against you.
Speaker 1 (44:52):
Dadda, Yeah, wow, you really I think about these things.
Speaker 2 (44:57):
That is absolutely part of the multi verse. Is you
you you doctor stranged it for us?
Speaker 3 (45:02):
I did? I did? Or you could just you know,
say I don't like your girlfriends like me. Neither got.
Speaker 1 (45:09):
God you said something to get it. Get in people's
relationships is tough. I always try to step back. I
made the mistake once of telling one of my very
good friends that I didn't like the woman he was with,
and uh, they were still together for multiple years after that,
and it was very awkward. Oh man, Yeah, and he
didn't he didn't appreciate that, and then I was like,
I think that open my eyes to be like some
(45:30):
things you just don't need to make your business even
though if you feel like you were doing the right
thing for your friend, which I did feel like I
was doing. I was just telling him I don't think
this is the right one for you. And he did
not receive that.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
Well, right, but there they are still together.
Speaker 3 (45:43):
And no, okay, I was right, but I don't put
in his face.
Speaker 2 (45:46):
At the end of the day, you were right.
Speaker 3 (45:47):
Yeah, okay, at the end of the day, I was right,
but I don't like to rob it in his face.
But he knows.
Speaker 2 (45:52):
Is he sitting in this room, No, he's not.
Speaker 3 (45:55):
I was looking at the camera because he watches and
you know so.
Speaker 2 (45:59):
Also so this just the little clues we get in
the emails. It's like he's reaching out to his parents
to do something about it. He seems young. The brother's
obviously young. It's a fresh relationship. So what's his name again, Brandon?
Speaker 3 (46:16):
Just know this.
Speaker 2 (46:17):
There's gonna be a thousand girls that are going to
be interested and dating and maybe not and all this
there's only one one. They would say, Oh, I'm looking
for the one. There's only one one. Sometimes there's two ones,
sometimes there's three ones in a lifetime. So odds are
if this young relationship is going to ride it out,
they're going to learn experiences from it and make the
(46:39):
next relationship even better. So just I know you care
about your brother, just shut your mouth, write it out.
You can't do anything about it. Mommy and Daddy can't
do anything about it. And mom and dad are a
little more experienced than you are, and if they ain't
doing shit, then you shouldn't either. But it's great that
you care about your brother. That's the win.
Speaker 1 (46:55):
Eventually, your brother is going to be walking the streets
holding a Tiffany necklace.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
In his hand that she gave back and crying, and
somebody's gonna.
Speaker 4 (47:01):
Say, my bro, well, that's been too cool obs.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
Great job, great job, buddy, too great to be here
in this new space. So we just keep upgrading the pod. Yes,
but folks, please submit video queries, your dilemmas, any issues,
interesting questions you want us to solve anything where you're
about Too Cool Mom's Pod at gmail dot com. Not
to be confused with Jiggy sixty eight seventy five Socks
(47:33):
Forever at gmail dot com.
Speaker 3 (47:35):
Yes, don't want to mix them up. We'll follow our Instagram.
Speaker 1 (47:37):
It's at two Cool Moms Pod and uh yeah, subscribe
to all this stuff.
Speaker 3 (47:42):
We love you.
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