July 22, 2025 • 44 mins
In another characteristically honest episode, Lisa unpacks the weird, squirmy discomfort of receiving a compliment-- and why some people would rather fake a seizure than say, "Thank you." She and Nick discuss the fine line between humility and self-loathing, the deeply rooted need to deflect praise, and why accepting kindness is somehow more stressful than death and public speaking. Listeners include one woman who panic every time someone says something nice to her, and another who wonders if she's fishing for validation or is just emotionally constipated.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Lisa Lampanelli is not a licensed therapist or life coach.
She is a meddling advice giving yana and know it all,
and her words come from her head, her heart, and
often out of her ass. This podcast should not be
misconstrued as therapy. I should be taking with a huge
grain of salt for entertainment purposes only.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
These.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
You need help, You're the problems. Come on, come down, lamb,
take a pill. I think you're insane. Do what I said,
(00:38):
dumb ass, listen to me. You you doude man my
energy I was browing out for a second, lost your god,
no care seats thing Westen. Everybody welcome to shrink this
(01:05):
with Lisa Lambinelli. I'm your house, Lisa Lambinelli. And that's
the other guy, Nick and nobody. Where's my camera? No
one wants to see you. We're loaded for bear. We
I feel like we've been up very early today.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Yeah, I'm up early most days, but today I.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
Was on an invitation for you to talk. It was
just like a pause, a meaningful pause. No, I know
you are up early every day because despite your looks,
you're a personal trainer. Isn't that ironic? It's like having
a smoking nurse. It just shouldn't be a thing.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Personality high for sure.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
You sure are. You're the one who like distract them
and tell them they're pretty. Speaking of which, by the way,
that's well, that would get us into our subject today.
But if anyone would like to send me a letter
and we will give you the advice to the best
of our ability, email us your question. That Shrink This
show at gmail dot com. That Shrink This sho at
gmail dot com. This is the podcast where we give
(02:03):
you all the answers you need to live your life
in a truly meaningful, fun way. But you'll ignore because
you're stupid and don't want any advice, much like any
twenty two year olds who think she has it together
just saying not naming names. Hi, Celia, that's our producer,
and I do say that in quotes. Bitch pushes a button.
Yeah that sounds hard many ones in your clit.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
She's still drugged from girl?
Speaker 3 (02:30):
No? Yeah ten months later?
Speaker 4 (02:32):
Yeah you Southern right, you're both so dumb. You're both
so dumb.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
All I need to know is Celia is a Southern whore?
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Yes, such true. Well, isn't there a show called Southern
charm that you're addicted to and you should do on
Southern wers.
Speaker 5 (02:51):
I belong on Southern No.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
You don't. You're neither southern nor charming. Now, Nick, the
reason I say what you said before about that you're
a personality higher, I was going to say it was
a compliment to you. And because today's episode is about compliments,
why they're so difficult to take, Why they're so easy
(03:13):
to give to others but difficult to take in. How
to handle compliments when we use them for the wrong reasons,
like manipulations, which I constantly do because I need to
get what I want all the time. Celia, you are
so pretty. See she finally started paying attention when I
said that. She got her head out of her asshole
and decided to look at Lisa so anyway and see
(03:35):
this she can't do. Okay, So let's start from the beginning.
Compliments are a very heated subject because they're very difficult
for some people to take. They either shirk them off
and make the person giving them feel stupid, or they
take them in maybe too much. Like I remember back
(03:56):
when I went from how what was my weight? Thirteen
years ago? What were they at like? Two forty eight.
I'll never forget.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
It, and you never peak? Was it that your peak?
Speaker 3 (04:07):
Well, here, let's put it this way. I went to
see the weight loss surgeon, which, by the way, I
do not promote weight loss surgery anymore. But I went
in there and I was two thirty seven, and he said, well,
we can have surgery in a couple months. So I
started eating like I had nine rectums because I said,
why not bulk up if I'm gonna get my stomach
cut out anyway, which is great. So no, it was
(04:28):
too forty eight and I lost one hundred and seven pounds.
So I remember when people would say you look great,
because back those were the days when you could compliment
women on weight loss. And it wasn't like my buddy's
fine either way, nice try bitch, m but you could compliment.
I went to the other side because I was so
happy that I had lost the weight. Though, when people say,
(04:50):
oh my god, you look great, I'd be like, right, yeah, no.
And I don't think that's the exact way to act either.
But it's also not the way to act when somebody's
as you look great, and you go either you ignore
it and stare at them or you go nobly. I
mean it's fine. It was cheap, Like, oh, I like
your blouse and I got it on eBay it was
(05:10):
five dollars. Like why why can't we just say thank you?
You know? So, Nick, you personally you must have a
difficult time taking compliments.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
Yeah, i'd say so because.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
You hate yourself, or at least you should.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
I could take a dick.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
But that is true both of them. But one thing,
Oh god, they fish pumped on camera. So what what
do you think gets in the way? Like right now, honestly,
you look much better than you did six months ago.
You started working on yourself emotionally, physically, kind of a
(05:46):
mind money spirit approach, and do take it all in
the act. And if I say to you, hey, Nick,
you look great, like what would be what would be
your real initial response?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I would go right to it. I usually go right
to a joke. I'd like it's depression, you know exactly?
Speaker 3 (06:04):
I would immediately right, So how do you think that
makes the person feel on the other end who said
the compliment?
Speaker 2 (06:11):
They probably go, what the hell's wrong with this guy?
Or why can't you just I'm trying to be nice here?
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Yeah? Well, I think it makes him feel unheard, not valued.
It's almost like if we take the compliment correctly, we're
actually doing them a favor. You know, we're actually going,
oh wow, you saw me, and I'm like kind of
honoring that, and I think that's great you said it.
So the deflection is kind of where everybody gets fed up.
You know. So do you inarguably think you look better
(06:38):
than six months ago or even just how your attitude is?
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Yeah, just you've done a lot of.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Internal for sure. No, it's definitely, like I mean, it's
not just a number on the scale thing too. I
definitely like even seeing myself on a video right now,
I don't want to jump out of this building as much.
I mean yeah, I mean I will. I hope. Yeah,
we're all hoping. I'm bringing till you with I mean.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
By the titt go.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
But no, I do feel better, but I think I'm
so far from where I have been where I was
that like it goes yeah, but I got it, you.
Speaker 3 (07:13):
Know, yeah, but I got it. That's what you That's right,
that is what you do. You go, Yeah, you do
this this weird like handwave of like like even tell
them. The person's almost like, oh, you swat them away like
a fly, so you swat away the compliment, you know,
And I think it's just like a general we generally
just kind of don't like something about ourselves, and we
(07:36):
we want to get back to a former self, which
probably can't be achieved anyway, because we're still going to
be older. Even if you or I got back to
a point of like, oh we looked our best at
quote twenty five or whatever age, the aging thing is
still there, so we can never really go back. But
then are we never going to take a compliment till
(07:56):
we invent a fucking time machine because we can't that.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
It's actually now. It just reminds me of a story
this happened to me recently. One of my clients is
a is actor, well known, crazily crazy, handsome, right, So
when I first met him, I was at don't worry
about it, so you just got moist. I'll tell you after.
But when I first met him, I was at my
heaviest personal trainer.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
Oh, by the way, we don't say heavy anymore. In
the fat community has taken back the word fat. Heavy.
Furniture is heavy. People are fat, We are fat. So
you were at yours.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I was fat tits McGee.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Yep, you were fat and things fatty fat.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
And I saw him like three weeks ago and he
goes it looks at me. He goes, do you look good?
You leaning out a little bit? And before I even
say thank you, I just went, yeah, man, I was disgusting.
I go, how do you think I felt training you
as han famous as you are and I have to
look like that? And we we have a relationship like that,
like we were dying laughing right, And and then he said,
(08:57):
he goes, well, I thought those you know can't do
and I was like, you, son of a bitch, She's right,
and we had we had a great time about it.
But I was like, yeah, man, I was. I couldn't
even say thank you man, I've been working on it.
I had to hard. I had to go to this
whole diet tribe about when I first met you, I
was at my fattest. How do you think I felt?
It was awful?
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Yeah? So you like offloaded on him. Oh yeah, But
even like before when we were coming up from the UH,
I think you knew today's episode was going to be
on compliments, So I think you kind of know how
to behave, so I said to you, and I got like, seriously, Nick,
I know I manipulate you sometimes with compliments because I'll
often like say he has the greatest driving and it's
actually true. But I don't know what I'm trying to manipulate.
(09:36):
I'm trying to manipulate him into a good mood or
to not put on some kind of music I hate
in the car he puts on this weird music. What
is that stuff? But yeah, I don't like that. I'm
also for the Spanish men, but I don't like to
think about it in the car with you where I
can't jerk off. So can you want thank you?
Speaker 5 (09:55):
So?
Speaker 3 (09:56):
But I was like, Nick, you're gonna think I'm manipulating you.
I just want to really say, you've just in the
past six months to a year, just you've come so
far as far as your attitude and used to be
deflecting all the time with humor and it's so much better.
And I think you knew you had to behave and
take a compliment, but it was like uncomfortable for you
a little and then you go, hey, thanks, that means
(10:17):
a lot. And that's kind of all people want to know,
is they're validated and what they're saying that we're not blind.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Yeah, that's because I think what you asked. When someone
does that to me, I start to like, this is
so annoying to say, but it's just true. I'll I'll
like get a little emotional and tier tier up.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
That's good.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Well, I know it's good, but I'll push it away.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
No, I get it.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
I'm very I'll stiff arm that shit.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
Well.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Even yesterday, I was with two of my arguably most
favorite people in the world, my brother who lives about
an hour and a half away. I don't see them enough,
but I always long to see them. Them, I mean them,
him and his wife. And we're talking just really casually
fun and she's like, god, I was thinking the other day,
how you took me and you know some of the kids,
(10:59):
they have six kids, me and even Tannery, I mean
the original cast to Hamilton. And then we see the
original cast of this and that she was We're saying
the other day to the kids, like we just thought
that was normal. How great is it that Aunt Lisa
made that happen? And that's a compliment, right, yeah, And
I just go, right, that was so much fun. So
I deflect to it was so much fun. Instead of
(11:21):
get emotional at oh my god, I've been thought of,
oh my god, thank you for saying that. It means
a lot to me because as a wealthy celebrity, as
you know, we buy affection. No, as someone who likes
to give those experiences to people, But then also then
take the compliment and be like, yeah, that I'm really
(11:43):
happy you remember that, cause you never know what people do,
they remember all you did, maybe maybe not, so yeah,
I think we just have to try to get better
at it. Do you think part of it comes from
just personally shitty self esteem, like that we don't feel
any of the things that Oh wait a minute, I
(12:03):
answer my own question because when I said before how
with the weight loss, people were like, you look great?
And I was. I knew that it was an obvious thing.
I liked better being thin. Despite that flawed thinking and
internalized pat phobia. It's not correct thinking, but I always
was like, I look better thin. It's just conditioning. It's societal,
(12:24):
it's die culture. So I was like, that's why I
would be like, yeah, you're right. When it's something I
truly feel, I could be like, yeah, dude, nailed it. Like,
if you said you're a really funny comedian, I'm like, yeah,
did fucking best in the world. But if you said
something like that I didn't necessarily agree with, like, oh,
(12:46):
you you know, you're such a you know, giving good soul,
which I kind of know is true, but also I
don't think I do enough. I'd be like, yeah, I'm fine,
but I'm still working on I mean, you know, maybe
by next year, by the time I'm eighty, I'll do
enough for the whole world. Yeah, it's like, whoa. If
I doubt it at all, I can't take it in.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
Yeah. I again, another story I thinking about as you're
talking about your in laws that were like all these
great plays. We went to my friend Anthony, I'm close
with his twin daughters, and I took them to go
see Elf, but at the local high school in Connecticut,
which was like basically, well.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
Let's let's put it this way. It's west for Connecticut,
so it's literally like better than off Broadway.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
It's insane.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Yeah, Anthony money, Yeah, he was like is this high school?
Speaker 2 (13:30):
And I was like, this is nuts, but he would
He's like, dude, you do these great things for the girls,
and like they love seeing you, and I go, I
gotta do something right. Nothing can I just like, that's
the first thing I go to, And I'm like, you know.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
What is because the thank you, just the simple to
words thank you seem as hard as We talked a
few episodes back about when you can't just say no
if somebody It was the alone time time episode of
Balance where it was like, well, you know, Noah is
(14:06):
a complete sentence. If somebody says, do you want to
go to dot dot dot? You could just say no.
But just letting no sit there is so hard, and
letting thank you sit there as hard. Especially maybe we
had that experience like in Mean Girls when Regina George
says to Lindsay Lohan's character, you're really pretty, and she
(14:27):
goes thank you, and she goes, oh, so you think
you are. So if we've had that experience, we're never
gonna say it again because you got Regina and George
sniffing around to punch you right in the cunt. If
you have confidence, like they want you to have confidence,
but not too much, so it's like stay in your lane,
you know. So I don't know, I think if it's
almost like a daily practice of just being like thank you.
(14:51):
It just hurts, like it's so much like if I
ever dated again, which I will not, if I was
ever in bed with a dude, you grosser and he
said such and such, like it's even too embarrassing to
say like that that you look good or whatever. And
(15:11):
you know, because women, but no, even below the neck
once you get older, there's some shit going down, like
your tits hang. Like I lost what like twenty seven
pounds because first episode we talked about the weight loss
meant yeah, I'm like owing clothes, I feel great. Dude,
(15:33):
there's some saggy ship even with the less weight. I
don't know if I could take a compliment from a
man like that ever, you know, so that's a that's
a tough one. Fat Yeah, I would throw up, go
shut up, like I would be big on shut up.
Your titties are ties, but your titties are less fat,
(15:55):
So just say thank you?
Speaker 2 (15:56):
All right?
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Yeah, Celia, what about you? Do you have a hard time?
I mean, theoretically, say you ever got a compliment that's
never happened to me? No, No, like what if I
said to you, honestly, if I go like this, oh
my god, you're such a good producer button pusher who
really has no talent. No, what if I said to you, no,
you're you're a really good producer, what would you say, thanks? Okay,
(16:21):
So you'd say I just started so meaning like I
have so much to grow. I don't know everything, Like.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
There's a whole give a lot of credit to the
person who taught me exactly him, but.
Speaker 3 (16:34):
Which just isn't a fucking Academy award speech. But this
isn't like thank Yeah, I love playing the bitch.
Speaker 5 (16:45):
I was thinking about like my canon event with with
this like compliment taking yea. I remember I went to
like an Episcopalian in middle school, and we had chapel
every morning, and in eighth grade, which is like the
end of it, you would have to read like a
scripture or something in front of the school and during
the chapel, And so it was my turn and after
(17:07):
one of my teachers came up to me and said,
you did a great job. And I remember being like, really,
I think I butchered that, and they were like, you
know what, why can't you take a compliment? Like got
mad at me?
Speaker 3 (17:17):
I don't blame them and you're a little cunt. Yeah,
I know what I'm saying. No, oh no, little cunt.
Speaker 5 (17:23):
Oh yes, no you're not and she and she got
like offended because she was like, yeah, my feelings of
you doing well, and I was like, wow, that makes
so much sense. So I kind of that's like that
voice is in my head each time, and so I
just try to, like honestly, even if it's pleasing the
other person, like making them feel valuating, like what they
(17:44):
said has value, which it does, but maybe you just
can't accept it.
Speaker 3 (17:48):
It has to almost their comfort has to outweigh your
need to put yourself down. So did you at the
time really think you butchered the thing?
Speaker 5 (17:56):
Yes, I felt like I couldn't breathe when I was
up there, like I'm not gonna push.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
I think there's there's nothing wrong with speaking the truth.
So if it's maybe some thank you, I'm so glad
you enjoyed it. I did feel like I butchered a
little worthy of points that you saw that, And she
could either say and because if it's me and I'm
being honest, I'd be like, yeah, there was that one
little point that was wonky, but you know what, for
the first time, it was great.
Speaker 5 (18:18):
Yeah, And I think she was just more upset with
me that I couldn't even say thank you, Like immediately
my mind was like, no, I did awful, Like I
wasn't even thank you for that.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
But to me, I didn't do that well. I think
it's all like we're so hard on ourselves that we
noticed the one area, so like you could improve in
like ten different ways and you'll still have in your mind,
oh that's the lemon direct didn't mail. It's like the
one person in the audience who doesn't laugh. I remember
doing a show once and I stormed off stage and
(18:48):
like it was like a theater. It was huge with
some STANDINGO and I stormed off and Jimmy big Balls,
my ex husband, was like in the wings and he
goes great, and I go, shut the fuck up. I
goes fucking sucked. I hate that Papa, But he's like,
what the fuck just happened? I was like, didn't you
hear that last joke? It didn't go like I wanted,
And it's like taken away the other hour and a half.
(19:08):
The other an hour and a half's a raced for
the one thing we don't like. So I think we
just got to like it's such an internal practice of
let's work on the areas we don't think we're nailing,
but then also the external practice of just say thank you,
which is hard. So look, we're all works in progress,
some of us more than others. Celia, you'll get there, girl,
(19:30):
I know you will.
Speaker 5 (19:31):
Get there, maybe one day when I'm like in the grave.
Speaker 3 (19:34):
I mean probably next week. This is a podcast. Do
you know what a podcast isn't?
Speaker 5 (19:41):
Now?
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's this thing that everyone has and very few were
good at, which illustrates why we're here. I would tell
you a group we're in now, we would take your
questions about our subject this week, which is compliments, how
to take them, how to not deflect them, use them
for good or evil. But before we go there, we're
talking to Celia about her type and taste in men,
(20:07):
and she said she fell on Harry styles Cock. Do
you know that that'll be next episode? It's going to
be called fixing Celia and her delusional tendencies. Now, speaking
of say, I have a question for you, because you
are a gen z. As you said, I know that
we're not supposed to compliment people on their looks anymore.
(20:29):
You're supposed to value I do no I look into
a lot of things. I read a lot of this
millennial and gen z thing. It's like people have more
to offer than their looks, so they say, don't compliment
people on weight loss, don't compliment people on you know,
whatever bodily change they have. What is your age group
(20:50):
and maybe just you can speak for that. Are you
allowed to compliment people? Because I've noticed lately the compliments
about body stuff almost like encouraging eating disordered behavior. So
how do you feel about this? I think that you absolutely.
Speaker 5 (21:07):
I mean, for me, like, I think getting compliments on
your looks is the most like validating, amazing feeling.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
So your shallow see that's good.
Speaker 5 (21:13):
Yeah, I think especially especially getting a compliment from like
a stranger on like your looks, it's like they don't
know anything about you. They just look at you and
they're like, oh, you're cool. I think that's like the
best type of compliment. But I also do think that
the times have changed. Like you're saying, like complimenting on
someone's body or something, it's it's it can be taken wrong.
Speaker 3 (21:37):
Is there a form one consign where you say I
allow I want to wear a sign around my next
saying you're allowed to compliment my weight loss because I'm
sixty three and have internalized fat phobia and would love
to know you notice exactly. So in other words, I
have a friend I do outfit of the day every
day and I send it to two friends just to
(21:59):
keep myself in a better mood by getting dressed up
every day. It's just as good for mentally. I have
fun with it. It's cute. I use all my vintage
and at the rift stop, so I have a good
time with it, and I have my friends are both
kind of woke, these two, so they always say like, oh,
those pants are so flattering and PSI I'm like, just
(22:20):
say you look good in those pants or oh those
obviously fit better now than they did twenty pounds ago.
So I'm of the age group that will take that
fucking compliment. Like for you, if somebody said you, hey,
you lost weight, would you be like, how dare you?
Speaker 5 (22:35):
No? Because this actually did happen to me. I've lost
like a pretty significant amount of weight in like the
last year, and I don't see my home friends too often.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
So like when I was just home one, did you
say your homo friends home? Oh? I guess the homeost
can be bitchy. Go ahead, They're brutally honest and honestly,
I would love that. I love it too.
Speaker 5 (22:54):
One of my girlfriends came up to me and she
was like she was definitely drunk, but she was like
and she was like a little southern accent. She's like,
you look like so tiny, I can't even lie.
Speaker 3 (23:05):
And I was like, stop it is. I love it.
Speaker 5 (23:08):
But I also had that moment where I was like, actually,
I feel humongous right now, and I feel like a
water buffalo and like I want to just put on
like sweatpants.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
Why because I did. That's how I felt, you mean,
because of the compliment. No, I just like you just
at the moment that way.
Speaker 5 (23:24):
Yeah, and so but she told me that and I
was like, but that is still very nice, and like
I thought about it the next day and I was like,
I felt good to hear that.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
Like did you just say thanks to her or did
you tell her?
Speaker 5 (23:35):
I was like, no, I feel like shit right now,
Like I mean.
Speaker 3 (23:37):
I don't think that's a bad thing to be like, No,
I personally feel like shit. Not you're wrong. Yeah, And
I said thank you.
Speaker 5 (23:43):
I did. I was like, thank you, but I actually
feel disgusting right now, like because I've just been drinking
for days and eating.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
Okay, you're just a drunken horn. Yeah, say I may
be thin, but I'm a drunken horn. Yeah I'm not thin.
But I was just like, well, thank you well because
honestly with you, I've definitely noticed body change with you,
and I'm like, I don't know if I'm allowed to
compliment people.
Speaker 5 (24:04):
And that's actually happened.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
Oh thank god, because all I wanted to say to
you is you like less like a water buffalo than
you used to? How dare you put that phrase? And
that's fucked up, dude, I always say that, or like
a cow on the beach. But but do you I
don't think you're this person. Will you ever look at
someone who was the size you were and be likeugh?
Speaker 5 (24:25):
I know?
Speaker 3 (24:26):
So we speak like ship to ourselves but not about them.
Like I'll see fat influencers all the time and I'm like,
why are you? Why would you laugh? Did I say
the end world? But there it's literally a category fat influencer.
Speaker 5 (24:42):
Well, they call them plus size.
Speaker 3 (24:43):
No, the real ones are the real ones. They don't
like because they're like plus what size? You can to
go deeper into the fat woke, politically correct chain. No, seriously,
anyone I follow is just like owns the word fat,
so they're just like, we've taken it back, but any
might fall. I'm like, oh my gosh, she looks so good.
Why couldn't I have figured that out? How Why am
(25:05):
I so old and can't get that? I looked okay
back then? So you just wonder I could. I would
never say to them, oh you fact hunt, Yeah, but
I would say it to myself easily back in the day.
Speaker 5 (25:17):
Or I wouldn't see someone like on the beach, for example,
and be like, oh my god, they look disgusting. In
that I would, but if I saw myself, I would
be like, ew, like she's nasty.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
Agreed, you know what I mean? No, I get it.
And it's just so sad the things we're not saints.
We would make fun of people, but not for that day. Yeah,
but we would kind of. But but it's just kind
of sad the way we do it to us instead,
And why is that any better? It's arguably worse. Yeah,
I agree. I get ready to jerk some guys off
(25:48):
and take compliments. Nick, I'm ready. I stop looking at
the camera you have since we've fixed you and you've
helped the cause and your a little tiny slip of
(26:08):
a girl. Go ahead, Nick, do we have some questions
for our idiotic viewers? Slash readers got some letters, man, okay, bitch.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
First one Dear Lisa. Last week a friend of mine
who I hadn't seen since the summer and told me
I look great, oh, and asked if I've been working out.
I said, oh, it must be the shirt Black is slimming.
Speaker 3 (26:31):
True though, which is.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
The name of my autobiography. Ye, black is slimming. The
truth is I did lose ten pounds and have been
working out. But if I said thank you, it would
feel weird, like look at me, I'm so great. Do
you think my response was Okay, thank you and yes,
oh Barbara, Woodland Hills, California.
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Oh oh, that's where my bank is anyway, ty Barbara,
that's my account, Barbara, and she has a back hunt. No, Barbara,
he isn't say the sends again if I said thank you?
Speaker 2 (27:01):
What if I said thank you, it would feel weird, like,
look at me, I'm so great.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
When did thank you equate to look at me I'm
so great? Because I mean, imagine, like my mother when
we were growing up, they'd kill themselves in that kitchen
for Christmas, for every holiday, Easter, Thanksgiving, and like five courses,
seven courses on Thanksgiving and the plates would be on
salt china, and you can't put it in the dishwasher
(27:26):
because dishwashers hadn't been invented yet. And if we said
to her, this was a great meal and she said
thank you, like that's an appropriate response versus, oh, I
don't know, the chicken was a little dry. Oh do
you think it's thank you? Shouldn't be misinterpreted as like, oh,
you're full of yourself. So and also the blackest slimming
(27:48):
thing is true correct, but it's defaulting to humor and
it's kind of not taking any credit. And it's the
kind of thing where I remember when I first realized
I was really good comic, and people would come backstage
and be like, oh my god. And this is like
twenty years in, so I already had built up confidence.
(28:10):
And at first, in the early days, they'd be like,
that was such a great set, and I'd go, yeah,
that audience was great. Well, twenty years later, when I
know I'm nailing it, you don't do the tiny show
thirteen times and not be decent at least And someone
would come backstage and always be a friend or a
relative and they'd go, oh my god, that audience was great,
(28:30):
and I'd literally say, you know why they were great
because I was fucking great, Because that audience would have
sat there like a bump on a cunt if I
had not been good. So why don't you rephrase that
fucking compliment and direct it right here? Like I would
get mad and I think I'm right, and he's a
star lady, So really, what they should have just said
(28:52):
was you were so good, and I would have been like, yeah, man,
and then i'd pro and weirdly enough, i'd probably then go, yeah,
I was good, brol So that was on fire. So
if I'm looping him in, So I don't think it
necessarily makes you sound conceited to give yourself a little credit.
Even if she said, oh my god, I'm so happy
you noticed because I've been working out and I lost
about ten pounds and I know weight isn't the goal,
(29:13):
but I feel better. That's a freaking nice way to
accept a compliment. Yeah, God, Barbara, get your shit together. Yeah,
fuck you, Celia can you can't? I mean, Celia's a
great lesson, and if she can do it, I mean
like anyone can. Literally, like literally, there's a lot wrong there.
Speaker 5 (29:32):
Literally got dropped on a mirror as a baby.
Speaker 3 (29:34):
I mean, did you look in it? Go ahead. Nick's
second letter, just.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
Kidding broke Okay, So hey, Lisa, Oh my name is
Kelly from Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
I think a home of Arthur Fonzarelli, who could not
say the words I'm sorry. He could no, no, actually
he couldn't say I'm wrong. You can't say I'm sorry.
Me and Nick kep to work on the fact that
he can't apologize. Arthur Fonzarelli from Happy Days from Milwaukee.
She did, I did, Oh my god, you know, but
(30:11):
adding literally nothing to what I'm saying, both you and
Nick have to say I'm sorry to me right now?
Go ahead? Nick, Sorry, No, look me in the eyes
and that click you mean it? He makes the camera.
But do you even know where the camera is? How
is it my showing? I don't know where the cameras
(30:31):
are because I'm not conceded. There be no podcast about me.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
Anyway.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
So Arthur Fonzarelli could not say I was wrong. There
was many episodes where Richie Cunningham would say, but you
have to admit you're wrong, and he goes, okay, I
and he could never say the words why did I
bring this up? Because Milwaukee home of Henry Winkler fons
(31:03):
of Relly couldn't say they lost their trend of thought
like I just did. But that's not a thing. That's
hard to say. Thank you, no, and fuck? And I
was wrong. I need to write a book.
Speaker 2 (31:15):
You should.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
I don't want to. So who is it? Who's a
letter from?
Speaker 2 (31:20):
It's from Kelly?
Speaker 3 (31:21):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (31:21):
Hi, Kelly from Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
Speaker 3 (31:23):
Oh wait, didn't you go to school there? Oh no?
That was mad? I said, added nothing.
Speaker 2 (31:28):
Go ahead, blowjobs? All right? I think I am fishing
for compliments and I don't know how to stop it.
I'm a little overweight and I was just on a
ski trip with my friends. When we all get dressed
for the hot tub each day, I would look around
and see all my skinny friends and couldn't help but
say to them, uhugh, I'm so fat. Then when none
of them would say no, you aren't, I couldn't help
(31:49):
but feel upset. And then I felt annoying. I know
this is wrong, but I'm not sure how to stop it.
Speaker 3 (31:54):
Oh my god. Okay, so I can relate a little
because I remember I was in this month long food
rehab in Wickenberg, Arizona. I checked myself in Wickenberg area
though I checked myself in for compulsive eating treatment, and
this is so many years ago, and like everyone else
(32:15):
in the thing, I was the only fat ass. Everyone
else was an anorexic. And let's be honest, anorexics looks
really good in bathing suits. That's why you shouldn't compliment
people on weight loss, by the way, because you could
be encouraging that. So I remember they'd all be sitting
in the pool and I'd amber over to that fuck
and I'm wattle over there, look at like a water
(32:35):
buffalo in a Delta Burke swimsuit. And You're just like,
I'm not getting compliments. I'm not nailing it. So like
I can relate, and it feels like othered and you
feel like left out. But okay, I was thinking about this.
If some person who's inarguably in a bigger body, as
they say, said oh I'm so fat, I'm not gonna
(32:59):
disagree with them because it's not true. I would say,
what if I was one of those skinny cunts, I
would be like, Wow, I wish you wouldn't talk about
yourself that way. But I'm not gonna jump and say
you're not fat because you're fucking fat. And I don't
think it does anyone to deserve it. I think doesn't
do anyone as service to deflect from the issue. And
(33:20):
the real issue is the internalized hatred she has for herself.
And look who loses her because she ended up feeling embarrassed,
She felt needy, she felt like she was fishing. Nothing
feels worse than dealing my dress. Somebody like your dress,
like say, you know, actually I don't love it, right,
but I'm glad you do. That's a trick I learned,
(33:42):
No literally, my stylist one said. I said to the
stylist ones, what do you say to someone if they go,
do you like my hair? You just go, I'm so
glad you do. And it's just like, I know it's
really hard to tell, well, but are you really supposed
to lie? I lie to an old lady, a little
kid and a dog. A dog's cute, no matter what,
(34:02):
even if it's an ugly cute like Sarah Jessica Parker
ugly cute. But that's why Parker's named after Sarah Jessica
Parker my dog, because they're both ugly cute and way
five pounds. So, I mean, I don't know, what do
you think, Nick, I think it's hard. I think she
felt bad about herself and maybe if she'd say it
(34:22):
in a more genuine way and maybe they could focus
the conversation on her fixing the internal stuff, it would work.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
Yeah. I mean, I've definitely done this, especially in my
chubby state that I'm in right now. Anytime I do anything,
especially at work or whatever, I'll be like, oh God,
I'm so.
Speaker 3 (34:37):
Fat, and what do you wait? But what are you
hoping comes of that?
Speaker 2 (34:42):
I don't know. I just say it intuitively. I think
it's like a like again, a deflection of like not
being able to take a compliment like affection of like
oh you look good, oh well blah blah blah, like
me just I'm getting to the punchline before you.
Speaker 3 (34:56):
Like, yeah, I'm but it doesn't sound like you do
it for fishing. I don't like I could imagine you.
I bet like you know how You're really terrible in
bed from what I've heard. Like if a girl says, oh,
that was the best true that that was the best
sex of my life, and then you would deflect with
I could have done better, Like, and you're looking to
(35:18):
pull the cop of and I think it makes you
feel dirty? Sure, yeah, so I think that's what this
poor chick is up to. So I would tell her
to like look in word a little and be like,
why did I actually say that? Because ps, even if
they said no, you're not, it's not going to make
you feel better. No, because you're going to think they're
lying anyway.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yeah, nothing changes.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
Yeah, so I would say, don't go on ski trips
with skinny cunts. Yeah, find yourself some fet pitches and
hang out with them.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Stop living in Wisconsin. Yeah, just cut it out.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
Just what I hate her?
Speaker 2 (35:49):
If you want to go to college there, fine, no
one likes you.
Speaker 3 (35:54):
Back to wait. We got one more, go ahead and.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
No more last one, Dear Lisa. I wore this cool
shirt I bought on eBay.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
Oh I love eBay now that I'm into sustainable fashion,
I totally really god Oh sorry, I don't wear the
same black T shirt every baby because black slimming.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
Not really, I guess. I wore this cool shirt I
bought on eBay yesterday and so many people complimented me
on it every time I said, thanks, it's twenty five
dollars on eBay. Yeah, why do I have to point
it out that it was cheap? Am I bragging? I
know I'm not the only one who does this. Thanks
Sophia from Boston, Massachusetts.
Speaker 3 (36:35):
Oh, that put a whole different spin on it, of
Bostonian because she's racist.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
Right.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
No, here's what I think. I don't think that's bad,
and I'll tell you why. Yes, it is deflecting a little.
And did she say she says thanks first? Thanks, I
got it on eBay.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Says.
Speaker 3 (36:54):
I think she's covered because I think the twenty five
The thank you says thank you, You've said the right thing,
and I hear your compliment. The other part is like
showing what a thrifty good shopper you are. I don't
think it's cheap. I think it's really fun. I love
to brag about buying secondhand because it makes me look
more woke and I want everyone to know that I
(37:16):
am like as blue as my fucking hair, So I
want them to know that sustainability is a blue trait,
so you know, you know your politics, you see it
coming when it comes to me. So I think maybe
with her, it's just a cool brag on her part.
I love a little humble brag.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Yeah, blue hair and blue balls over.
Speaker 3 (37:34):
No, you were thinking of that and not listening to
what I said. React to what I said, You freaking dopey.
Here's the word blue and has like he's the first
one to ever have that fucking reference. God almighty, it's new. No,
but don't you think she's just adding like a good
trait of herself, like frugality and like, oh my god,
look at how I get proud when I search for
something and find it, Like say, Nick was even gayer
(37:58):
than we think he is, and he like gayer even
still for Sabrina Carpenter and I found him a kick
ass Sabrina Carpenter tore t shirt in a size xxxxxxx
L and I was like, oh my god, Nick, look
twenty five on eBay. I got it for you. Like
that's a brag on me, Like, look at how I
nailed it.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
Yeah, I think it'd be worse if she was like,
oh my god, I love this shirt like thanks, it
was actually two hundred dollars.
Speaker 3 (38:22):
That down, thank you. That's the shitty person. I used
to have a friend who would always do that. He
would go like, oh my god, I like your shoes
and he need'd go Gucci and I'd be like that
totally takes away from the compliment. Plus it makes you
appear like you can only if you have to brag
you're wearing Gucci. That's the one pair you can afford.
(38:43):
And you should never buy a pair of Gucci shoes.
If you can't afford ten, you're obviously out outside of
your league. You're actually just devaluing everything.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
I couldn't spend six hundred tow one thousand dollars on
a pair of sneakers. That's fucking insane.
Speaker 3 (38:59):
Certainly not the subject of anything we're talking about. I'm sorry.
Gucci shoes are a lot more than that.
Speaker 2 (39:07):
No, I know, but like even that, what the what
are we doing here?
Speaker 3 (39:11):
Well? No, I as someone who like has been through
all that and knows you get no meaning out of it.
I know it's all bullshit and it doesn't fix anything internally,
Like it's literally you could put what do they call
a silk purse on a You can't make a silk
cat on a pig. It's a silk cat on a pig.
Like you still hate yourself despite your You're a well
(39:33):
dressed asshole in a Gucci star gunt.
Speaker 2 (39:41):
You know why, let's start a gunt.
Speaker 5 (39:44):
I will not stand for the hate for my favorite sustainable.
Speaker 3 (39:50):
It's not sustainable. I open that you guys aren't gonna
know what we're talking about. But miss things Celia labeled
up the other day and you have a big fat
ghani across her fucking big tits, And I'm like, why
do I have to be drawn to look there? First
of all, I'm a woman hat. Second again one.
Speaker 2 (40:11):
Not better, not better, old hat, titsilly.
Speaker 3 (40:16):
Titsy hat. Her tits are as big as her head
than they used to be. Is that a compliment? I
guess I think it is just say thank you. Oh
my god, our tits are shrinking over here. Oh my god.
We have nothing, we have learned nothing. We have learned
to say fucking thank you to fucking If you've bought
(40:36):
something cheap and want to brag about it, enjoy yourself.
We also, at the end of most episodes, we have
time do Lisa's fuck up of the week, and I
was like searching my head. I'm like, I'm so perfect physically,
(40:56):
emotionally and spiritually. What good? What a course? Then I
have to do something on our break that is like, oh,
I fucked up. There's a girl here who works in
promotion and iHeart who's super hot and sexy, and I
know that Nick has a little thing for her. But
instead of letting it unfold naturally, when she comes in
(41:19):
to say hi and be like, oh do you remember Nick,
I go, he has a crush out and you he
really like and stop him like I it's like, then
puts it like where Now it's jokey and like if
you really wanted a chance to flirt, maybe I fucked
it up, So I apologize. Did I fuck up? Was
that having a fuck up on my part? Do you think?
Or did I make it lighter? Or what do you think?
Speaker 2 (41:40):
Tune in next week we'll find that.
Speaker 3 (41:42):
No, do you think, Celia, do you think it's bad
to like sort of be like he likes You'll really?
Oh so I'm just being hard on myself. Yes, And
would you say that I'm like so perfect?
Speaker 5 (41:55):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (41:55):
Oh my good? Thank you?
Speaker 2 (41:58):
Speaking of yourself be gonna get in hard.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Do you see how we illustrated nicely in exchange of
a nice compliment and a thank you. Let's do it
again for the people who didn't hear because Nick was
deflecting with his rare brand of blue humor. So would
you say I'm emotionally and physically nailing it, Celia? I
absolutely would thank you, You're welcome, but really I'm still
(42:28):
working on it. That's definitely Nick. All Right, you guys,
listen if you agree that I'm emotionally, physically and universally
and bilaterally and intellectually perfect, Tune in again next episode
for Shrink This with Lisa Lampinelli and Nick once again.
Where can the people find y'all?
Speaker 2 (42:47):
You could follow me at nick Scopes on Instagram and
TikTok and it's all one app is you know what?
Speaker 3 (43:00):
Because don't you sometimes jerk off in your food and
eat it? Order cock? I mean, if you type in
cock onub, I wonder what comes up.
Speaker 2 (43:10):
It's gotta be an Asian place, Chicken place.
Speaker 3 (43:13):
That's a fair. If you mean dick, what do you
think comes up a dick somewhere?
Speaker 2 (43:19):
Egg plant parm?
Speaker 3 (43:21):
Egg plant parm? God, Nick, this is why look how funny?
How funny?
Speaker 5 (43:28):
What are you.
Speaker 3 (43:28):
Supposed to say?
Speaker 2 (43:30):
Funny?
Speaker 3 (43:34):
I give up, he's learned nothing. Nick, say our lovely
outro for the show that I really am above the
pay grade of saying all.
Speaker 2 (43:41):
Right, thanks for listening. Be sure to email us your
questions at shrink the Show at gmail.
Speaker 3 (43:46):
You know I got to interrupt. You always sound like
half a fucking numbskull. You read like I thought you said.
Speaker 2 (43:53):
I was, okay, spider better falling it?
Speaker 3 (43:56):
Okay, well, freeballing and I'll see if you have all.
Speaker 2 (43:58):
For listening, be sure to email us at shrink This
Show at gmail dot com. That is, Shrink this Show
at gmail dot com. Follow Lisa on socials at Lisa Lampinelli,
follow me at Nick Scopes on all the fucking social
media shit, and make sure to listen to Shrink This
on your iHeartRadio app or wherever you get podcasts. We
(44:19):
don't care.
Speaker 3 (44:20):
We don't care as long as you do the iHeart
download these others. They're they're capitalists, yes, not iHeart. It's
a charity, yes, it's one of those. All the money
go directly to fix Max's brain tumor dot com.
Speaker 2 (44:34):
Where's the marketing department. Let's go find this girl.
Lisa Lampanelli is not a licensed therapist or life coach.
She is a meddling advice giving yana and know it all,
and her words come from her head, her heart, and
often out of her ass. This podcast should not be
misconstrued as therapy. I should be taking with a huge
grain of salt for entertainment purposes only.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
These.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
You need help, You're the problems. Come on, come down, lamb,
take a pill. I think you're insane. Do what I said,
(00:38):
dumb ass, listen to me. You you doude man my
energy I was browing out for a second, lost your god,
no care seats thing Westen. Everybody welcome to shrink this
(01:05):
with Lisa Lambinelli. I'm your house, Lisa Lambinelli. And that's
the other guy, Nick and nobody. Where's my camera? No
one wants to see you. We're loaded for bear. We
I feel like we've been up very early today.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Yeah, I'm up early most days, but today I.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
Was on an invitation for you to talk. It was
just like a pause, a meaningful pause. No, I know
you are up early every day because despite your looks,
you're a personal trainer. Isn't that ironic? It's like having
a smoking nurse. It just shouldn't be a thing.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Personality high for sure.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
You sure are. You're the one who like distract them
and tell them they're pretty. Speaking of which, by the way,
that's well, that would get us into our subject today.
But if anyone would like to send me a letter
and we will give you the advice to the best
of our ability, email us your question. That Shrink This
show at gmail dot com. That Shrink This sho at
gmail dot com. This is the podcast where we give
(02:03):
you all the answers you need to live your life
in a truly meaningful, fun way. But you'll ignore because
you're stupid and don't want any advice, much like any
twenty two year olds who think she has it together
just saying not naming names. Hi, Celia, that's our producer,
and I do say that in quotes. Bitch pushes a button.
Yeah that sounds hard many ones in your clit.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
She's still drugged from girl?
Speaker 3 (02:30):
No? Yeah ten months later?
Speaker 4 (02:32):
Yeah you Southern right, you're both so dumb. You're both
so dumb.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
All I need to know is Celia is a Southern whore?
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Yes, such true. Well, isn't there a show called Southern
charm that you're addicted to and you should do on
Southern wers.
Speaker 5 (02:51):
I belong on Southern No.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
You don't. You're neither southern nor charming. Now, Nick, the
reason I say what you said before about that you're
a personality higher, I was going to say it was
a compliment to you. And because today's episode is about compliments,
why they're so difficult to take, Why they're so easy
(03:13):
to give to others but difficult to take in. How
to handle compliments when we use them for the wrong reasons,
like manipulations, which I constantly do because I need to
get what I want all the time. Celia, you are
so pretty. See she finally started paying attention when I
said that. She got her head out of her asshole
and decided to look at Lisa so anyway and see
(03:35):
this she can't do. Okay, So let's start from the beginning.
Compliments are a very heated subject because they're very difficult
for some people to take. They either shirk them off
and make the person giving them feel stupid, or they
take them in maybe too much. Like I remember back
(03:56):
when I went from how what was my weight? Thirteen
years ago? What were they at like? Two forty eight.
I'll never forget.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
It, and you never peak? Was it that your peak?
Speaker 3 (04:07):
Well, here, let's put it this way. I went to
see the weight loss surgeon, which, by the way, I
do not promote weight loss surgery anymore. But I went
in there and I was two thirty seven, and he said, well,
we can have surgery in a couple months. So I
started eating like I had nine rectums because I said,
why not bulk up if I'm gonna get my stomach
cut out anyway, which is great. So no, it was
(04:28):
too forty eight and I lost one hundred and seven pounds.
So I remember when people would say you look great,
because back those were the days when you could compliment
women on weight loss. And it wasn't like my buddy's
fine either way, nice try bitch, m but you could compliment.
I went to the other side because I was so
happy that I had lost the weight. Though, when people say,
(04:50):
oh my god, you look great, I'd be like, right, yeah, no.
And I don't think that's the exact way to act either.
But it's also not the way to act when somebody's
as you look great, and you go either you ignore
it and stare at them or you go nobly. I
mean it's fine. It was cheap, Like, oh, I like
your blouse and I got it on eBay it was
(05:10):
five dollars. Like why why can't we just say thank you?
You know? So, Nick, you personally you must have a
difficult time taking compliments.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
Yeah, i'd say so because.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
You hate yourself, or at least you should.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
I could take a dick.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
But that is true both of them. But one thing,
Oh god, they fish pumped on camera. So what what
do you think gets in the way? Like right now, honestly,
you look much better than you did six months ago.
You started working on yourself emotionally, physically, kind of a
(05:46):
mind money spirit approach, and do take it all in
the act. And if I say to you, hey, Nick,
you look great, like what would be what would be
your real initial response?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I would go right to it. I usually go right
to a joke. I'd like it's depression, you know exactly?
Speaker 3 (06:04):
I would immediately right, So how do you think that
makes the person feel on the other end who said
the compliment?
Speaker 2 (06:11):
They probably go, what the hell's wrong with this guy?
Or why can't you just I'm trying to be nice here?
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Yeah? Well, I think it makes him feel unheard, not valued.
It's almost like if we take the compliment correctly, we're
actually doing them a favor. You know, we're actually going,
oh wow, you saw me, and I'm like kind of
honoring that, and I think that's great you said it.
So the deflection is kind of where everybody gets fed up.
You know. So do you inarguably think you look better
(06:38):
than six months ago or even just how your attitude is?
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Yeah, just you've done a lot of.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Internal for sure. No, it's definitely, like I mean, it's
not just a number on the scale thing too. I
definitely like even seeing myself on a video right now,
I don't want to jump out of this building as much.
I mean yeah, I mean I will. I hope. Yeah,
we're all hoping. I'm bringing till you with I mean.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
By the titt go.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
But no, I do feel better, but I think I'm
so far from where I have been where I was
that like it goes yeah, but I got it, you.
Speaker 3 (07:13):
Know, yeah, but I got it. That's what you That's right,
that is what you do. You go, Yeah, you do
this this weird like handwave of like like even tell
them. The person's almost like, oh, you swat them away like
a fly, so you swat away the compliment, you know,
And I think it's just like a general we generally
just kind of don't like something about ourselves, and we
(07:36):
we want to get back to a former self, which
probably can't be achieved anyway, because we're still going to
be older. Even if you or I got back to
a point of like, oh we looked our best at
quote twenty five or whatever age, the aging thing is
still there, so we can never really go back. But
then are we never going to take a compliment till
(07:56):
we invent a fucking time machine because we can't that.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
It's actually now. It just reminds me of a story
this happened to me recently. One of my clients is
a is actor, well known, crazily crazy, handsome, right, So
when I first met him, I was at don't worry
about it, so you just got moist. I'll tell you after.
But when I first met him, I was at my
heaviest personal trainer.
Speaker 3 (08:19):
Oh, by the way, we don't say heavy anymore. In
the fat community has taken back the word fat. Heavy.
Furniture is heavy. People are fat, We are fat. So
you were at yours.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I was fat tits McGee.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Yep, you were fat and things fatty fat.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
And I saw him like three weeks ago and he
goes it looks at me. He goes, do you look good?
You leaning out a little bit? And before I even
say thank you, I just went, yeah, man, I was disgusting.
I go, how do you think I felt training you
as han famous as you are and I have to
look like that? And we we have a relationship like that,
like we were dying laughing right, And and then he said,
(08:57):
he goes, well, I thought those you know can't do
and I was like, you, son of a bitch, She's right,
and we had we had a great time about it.
But I was like, yeah, man, I was. I couldn't
even say thank you man, I've been working on it.
I had to hard. I had to go to this
whole diet tribe about when I first met you, I
was at my fattest. How do you think I felt?
It was awful?
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Yeah? So you like offloaded on him. Oh yeah, But
even like before when we were coming up from the UH,
I think you knew today's episode was going to be
on compliments, So I think you kind of know how
to behave, so I said to you, and I got like, seriously, Nick,
I know I manipulate you sometimes with compliments because I'll
often like say he has the greatest driving and it's
actually true. But I don't know what I'm trying to manipulate.
(09:36):
I'm trying to manipulate him into a good mood or
to not put on some kind of music I hate
in the car he puts on this weird music. What
is that stuff? But yeah, I don't like that. I'm
also for the Spanish men, but I don't like to
think about it in the car with you where I
can't jerk off. So can you want thank you?
Speaker 5 (09:55):
So?
Speaker 3 (09:56):
But I was like, Nick, you're gonna think I'm manipulating you.
I just want to really say, you've just in the
past six months to a year, just you've come so
far as far as your attitude and used to be
deflecting all the time with humor and it's so much better.
And I think you knew you had to behave and
take a compliment, but it was like uncomfortable for you
a little and then you go, hey, thanks, that means
(10:17):
a lot. And that's kind of all people want to know,
is they're validated and what they're saying that we're not blind.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Yeah, that's because I think what you asked. When someone
does that to me, I start to like, this is
so annoying to say, but it's just true. I'll I'll
like get a little emotional and tier tier up.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
That's good.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
Well, I know it's good, but I'll push it away.
Speaker 3 (10:35):
No, I get it.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
I'm very I'll stiff arm that shit.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
Well.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Even yesterday, I was with two of my arguably most
favorite people in the world, my brother who lives about
an hour and a half away. I don't see them enough,
but I always long to see them. Them, I mean them,
him and his wife. And we're talking just really casually
fun and she's like, god, I was thinking the other day,
how you took me and you know some of the kids,
(10:59):
they have six kids, me and even Tannery, I mean
the original cast to Hamilton. And then we see the
original cast of this and that she was We're saying
the other day to the kids, like we just thought
that was normal. How great is it that Aunt Lisa
made that happen? And that's a compliment, right, yeah, And
I just go, right, that was so much fun. So
I deflect to it was so much fun. Instead of
(11:21):
get emotional at oh my god, I've been thought of,
oh my god, thank you for saying that. It means
a lot to me because as a wealthy celebrity, as
you know, we buy affection. No, as someone who likes
to give those experiences to people, But then also then
take the compliment and be like, yeah, that I'm really
(11:43):
happy you remember that, cause you never know what people do,
they remember all you did, maybe maybe not, so yeah,
I think we just have to try to get better
at it. Do you think part of it comes from
just personally shitty self esteem, like that we don't feel
any of the things that Oh wait a minute, I
(12:03):
answer my own question because when I said before how
with the weight loss, people were like, you look great?
And I was. I knew that it was an obvious thing.
I liked better being thin. Despite that flawed thinking and
internalized pat phobia. It's not correct thinking, but I always
was like, I look better thin. It's just conditioning. It's societal,
(12:24):
it's die culture. So I was like, that's why I
would be like, yeah, you're right. When it's something I
truly feel, I could be like, yeah, dude, nailed it. Like,
if you said you're a really funny comedian, I'm like, yeah,
did fucking best in the world. But if you said
something like that I didn't necessarily agree with, like, oh,
(12:46):
you you know, you're such a you know, giving good soul,
which I kind of know is true, but also I
don't think I do enough. I'd be like, yeah, I'm fine,
but I'm still working on I mean, you know, maybe
by next year, by the time I'm eighty, I'll do
enough for the whole world. Yeah, it's like, whoa. If
I doubt it at all, I can't take it in.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
Yeah. I again, another story I thinking about as you're
talking about your in laws that were like all these
great plays. We went to my friend Anthony, I'm close
with his twin daughters, and I took them to go
see Elf, but at the local high school in Connecticut,
which was like basically, well.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
Let's let's put it this way. It's west for Connecticut,
so it's literally like better than off Broadway.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
It's insane.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Yeah, Anthony money, Yeah, he was like is this high school?
Speaker 2 (13:30):
And I was like, this is nuts, but he would
He's like, dude, you do these great things for the girls,
and like they love seeing you, and I go, I
gotta do something right. Nothing can I just like, that's
the first thing I go to, And I'm like, you know.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
What is because the thank you, just the simple to
words thank you seem as hard as We talked a
few episodes back about when you can't just say no
if somebody It was the alone time time episode of
Balance where it was like, well, you know, Noah is
(14:06):
a complete sentence. If somebody says, do you want to
go to dot dot dot? You could just say no.
But just letting no sit there is so hard, and
letting thank you sit there as hard. Especially maybe we
had that experience like in Mean Girls when Regina George
says to Lindsay Lohan's character, you're really pretty, and she
(14:27):
goes thank you, and she goes, oh, so you think
you are. So if we've had that experience, we're never
gonna say it again because you got Regina and George
sniffing around to punch you right in the cunt. If
you have confidence, like they want you to have confidence,
but not too much, so it's like stay in your lane,
you know. So I don't know, I think if it's
almost like a daily practice of just being like thank you.
(14:51):
It just hurts, like it's so much like if I
ever dated again, which I will not, if I was
ever in bed with a dude, you grosser and he
said such and such, like it's even too embarrassing to
say like that that you look good or whatever. And
(15:11):
you know, because women, but no, even below the neck
once you get older, there's some shit going down, like
your tits hang. Like I lost what like twenty seven
pounds because first episode we talked about the weight loss
meant yeah, I'm like owing clothes, I feel great. Dude,
(15:33):
there's some saggy ship even with the less weight. I
don't know if I could take a compliment from a
man like that ever, you know, so that's a that's
a tough one. Fat Yeah, I would throw up, go
shut up, like I would be big on shut up.
Your titties are ties, but your titties are less fat,
(15:55):
So just say thank you?
Speaker 2 (15:56):
All right?
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Yeah, Celia, what about you? Do you have a hard time?
I mean, theoretically, say you ever got a compliment that's
never happened to me? No, No, like what if I
said to you, honestly, if I go like this, oh
my god, you're such a good producer button pusher who
really has no talent. No, what if I said to you, no,
you're you're a really good producer, what would you say, thanks? Okay,
(16:21):
So you'd say I just started so meaning like I
have so much to grow. I don't know everything, Like.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
There's a whole give a lot of credit to the
person who taught me exactly him, but.
Speaker 3 (16:34):
Which just isn't a fucking Academy award speech. But this
isn't like thank Yeah, I love playing the bitch.
Speaker 5 (16:45):
I was thinking about like my canon event with with
this like compliment taking yea. I remember I went to
like an Episcopalian in middle school, and we had chapel
every morning, and in eighth grade, which is like the
end of it, you would have to read like a
scripture or something in front of the school and during
the chapel, And so it was my turn and after
(17:07):
one of my teachers came up to me and said,
you did a great job. And I remember being like, really,
I think I butchered that, and they were like, you
know what, why can't you take a compliment? Like got
mad at me?
Speaker 3 (17:17):
I don't blame them and you're a little cunt. Yeah,
I know what I'm saying. No, oh no, little cunt.
Speaker 5 (17:23):
Oh yes, no you're not and she and she got
like offended because she was like, yeah, my feelings of
you doing well, and I was like, wow, that makes
so much sense. So I kind of that's like that
voice is in my head each time, and so I
just try to, like honestly, even if it's pleasing the
other person, like making them feel valuating, like what they
(17:44):
said has value, which it does, but maybe you just
can't accept it.
Speaker 3 (17:48):
It has to almost their comfort has to outweigh your
need to put yourself down. So did you at the
time really think you butchered the thing?
Speaker 5 (17:56):
Yes, I felt like I couldn't breathe when I was
up there, like I'm not gonna push.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
I think there's there's nothing wrong with speaking the truth.
So if it's maybe some thank you, I'm so glad
you enjoyed it. I did feel like I butchered a
little worthy of points that you saw that, And she
could either say and because if it's me and I'm
being honest, I'd be like, yeah, there was that one
little point that was wonky, but you know what, for
the first time, it was great.
Speaker 5 (18:18):
Yeah, And I think she was just more upset with
me that I couldn't even say thank you, Like immediately
my mind was like, no, I did awful, Like I
wasn't even thank you for that.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
But to me, I didn't do that well. I think
it's all like we're so hard on ourselves that we
noticed the one area, so like you could improve in
like ten different ways and you'll still have in your mind,
oh that's the lemon direct didn't mail. It's like the
one person in the audience who doesn't laugh. I remember
doing a show once and I stormed off stage and
(18:48):
like it was like a theater. It was huge with
some STANDINGO and I stormed off and Jimmy big Balls,
my ex husband, was like in the wings and he
goes great, and I go, shut the fuck up. I
goes fucking sucked. I hate that Papa, But he's like,
what the fuck just happened? I was like, didn't you
hear that last joke? It didn't go like I wanted,
And it's like taken away the other hour and a half.
(19:08):
The other an hour and a half's a raced for
the one thing we don't like. So I think we
just got to like it's such an internal practice of
let's work on the areas we don't think we're nailing,
but then also the external practice of just say thank you,
which is hard. So look, we're all works in progress,
some of us more than others. Celia, you'll get there, girl,
(19:30):
I know you will.
Speaker 5 (19:31):
Get there, maybe one day when I'm like in the grave.
Speaker 3 (19:34):
I mean probably next week. This is a podcast. Do
you know what a podcast isn't?
Speaker 5 (19:41):
Now?
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's this thing that everyone has and very few were
good at, which illustrates why we're here. I would tell
you a group we're in now, we would take your
questions about our subject this week, which is compliments, how
to take them, how to not deflect them, use them
for good or evil. But before we go there, we're
talking to Celia about her type and taste in men,
(20:07):
and she said she fell on Harry styles Cock. Do
you know that that'll be next episode? It's going to
be called fixing Celia and her delusional tendencies. Now, speaking
of say, I have a question for you, because you
are a gen z. As you said, I know that
we're not supposed to compliment people on their looks anymore.
(20:29):
You're supposed to value I do no I look into
a lot of things. I read a lot of this
millennial and gen z thing. It's like people have more
to offer than their looks, so they say, don't compliment
people on weight loss, don't compliment people on you know,
whatever bodily change they have. What is your age group
(20:50):
and maybe just you can speak for that. Are you
allowed to compliment people? Because I've noticed lately the compliments
about body stuff almost like encouraging eating disordered behavior. So
how do you feel about this? I think that you absolutely.
Speaker 5 (21:07):
I mean, for me, like, I think getting compliments on
your looks is the most like validating, amazing feeling.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
So your shallow see that's good.
Speaker 5 (21:13):
Yeah, I think especially especially getting a compliment from like
a stranger on like your looks, it's like they don't
know anything about you. They just look at you and
they're like, oh, you're cool. I think that's like the
best type of compliment. But I also do think that
the times have changed. Like you're saying, like complimenting on
someone's body or something, it's it's it can be taken wrong.
Speaker 3 (21:37):
Is there a form one consign where you say I
allow I want to wear a sign around my next
saying you're allowed to compliment my weight loss because I'm
sixty three and have internalized fat phobia and would love
to know you notice exactly. So in other words, I
have a friend I do outfit of the day every
day and I send it to two friends just to
(21:59):
keep myself in a better mood by getting dressed up
every day. It's just as good for mentally. I have
fun with it. It's cute. I use all my vintage
and at the rift stop, so I have a good
time with it, and I have my friends are both
kind of woke, these two, so they always say like, oh,
those pants are so flattering and PSI I'm like, just
(22:20):
say you look good in those pants or oh those
obviously fit better now than they did twenty pounds ago.
So I'm of the age group that will take that
fucking compliment. Like for you, if somebody said you, hey,
you lost weight, would you be like, how dare you?
Speaker 5 (22:35):
No? Because this actually did happen to me. I've lost
like a pretty significant amount of weight in like the
last year, and I don't see my home friends too often.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
So like when I was just home one, did you
say your homo friends home? Oh? I guess the homeost
can be bitchy. Go ahead, They're brutally honest and honestly,
I would love that. I love it too.
Speaker 5 (22:54):
One of my girlfriends came up to me and she
was like she was definitely drunk, but she was like
and she was like a little southern accent. She's like,
you look like so tiny, I can't even lie.
Speaker 3 (23:05):
And I was like, stop it is. I love it.
Speaker 5 (23:08):
But I also had that moment where I was like, actually,
I feel humongous right now, and I feel like a
water buffalo and like I want to just put on
like sweatpants.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
Why because I did. That's how I felt, you mean,
because of the compliment. No, I just like you just
at the moment that way.
Speaker 5 (23:24):
Yeah, and so but she told me that and I
was like, but that is still very nice, and like
I thought about it the next day and I was like,
I felt good to hear that.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
Like did you just say thanks to her or did
you tell her?
Speaker 5 (23:35):
I was like, no, I feel like shit right now,
Like I mean.
Speaker 3 (23:37):
I don't think that's a bad thing to be like, No,
I personally feel like shit. Not you're wrong. Yeah, And
I said thank you.
Speaker 5 (23:43):
I did. I was like, thank you, but I actually
feel disgusting right now, like because I've just been drinking
for days and eating.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
Okay, you're just a drunken horn. Yeah, say I may
be thin, but I'm a drunken horn. Yeah I'm not thin.
But I was just like, well, thank you well because
honestly with you, I've definitely noticed body change with you,
and I'm like, I don't know if I'm allowed to
compliment people.
Speaker 5 (24:04):
And that's actually happened.
Speaker 3 (24:05):
Oh thank god, because all I wanted to say to
you is you like less like a water buffalo than
you used to? How dare you put that phrase? And
that's fucked up, dude, I always say that, or like
a cow on the beach. But but do you I
don't think you're this person. Will you ever look at
someone who was the size you were and be likeugh?
Speaker 5 (24:25):
I know?
Speaker 3 (24:26):
So we speak like ship to ourselves but not about them.
Like I'll see fat influencers all the time and I'm like,
why are you? Why would you laugh? Did I say
the end world? But there it's literally a category fat influencer.
Speaker 5 (24:42):
Well, they call them plus size.
Speaker 3 (24:43):
No, the real ones are the real ones. They don't
like because they're like plus what size? You can to
go deeper into the fat woke, politically correct chain. No, seriously,
anyone I follow is just like owns the word fat,
so they're just like, we've taken it back, but any
might fall. I'm like, oh my gosh, she looks so good.
Why couldn't I have figured that out? How Why am
(25:05):
I so old and can't get that? I looked okay
back then? So you just wonder I could. I would
never say to them, oh you fact hunt, Yeah, but
I would say it to myself easily back in the day.
Speaker 5 (25:17):
Or I wouldn't see someone like on the beach, for example,
and be like, oh my god, they look disgusting. In
that I would, but if I saw myself, I would
be like, ew, like she's nasty.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
Agreed, you know what I mean? No, I get it.
And it's just so sad the things we're not saints.
We would make fun of people, but not for that day. Yeah,
but we would kind of. But but it's just kind
of sad the way we do it to us instead,
And why is that any better? It's arguably worse. Yeah,
I agree. I get ready to jerk some guys off
(25:48):
and take compliments. Nick, I'm ready. I stop looking at
the camera you have since we've fixed you and you've
helped the cause and your a little tiny slip of
(26:08):
a girl. Go ahead, Nick, do we have some questions
for our idiotic viewers? Slash readers got some letters, man, okay, bitch.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
First one Dear Lisa. Last week a friend of mine
who I hadn't seen since the summer and told me
I look great, oh, and asked if I've been working out.
I said, oh, it must be the shirt Black is slimming.
Speaker 3 (26:31):
True though, which is.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
The name of my autobiography. Ye, black is slimming. The
truth is I did lose ten pounds and have been
working out. But if I said thank you, it would
feel weird, like look at me, I'm so great. Do
you think my response was Okay, thank you and yes,
oh Barbara, Woodland Hills, California.
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Oh oh, that's where my bank is anyway, ty Barbara,
that's my account, Barbara, and she has a back hunt. No, Barbara,
he isn't say the sends again if I said thank you?
Speaker 2 (27:01):
What if I said thank you, it would feel weird, like,
look at me, I'm so great.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
When did thank you equate to look at me I'm
so great? Because I mean, imagine, like my mother when
we were growing up, they'd kill themselves in that kitchen
for Christmas, for every holiday, Easter, Thanksgiving, and like five courses,
seven courses on Thanksgiving and the plates would be on
salt china, and you can't put it in the dishwasher
(27:26):
because dishwashers hadn't been invented yet. And if we said
to her, this was a great meal and she said
thank you, like that's an appropriate response versus, oh, I
don't know, the chicken was a little dry. Oh do
you think it's thank you? Shouldn't be misinterpreted as like, oh,
you're full of yourself. So and also the blackest slimming
(27:48):
thing is true correct, but it's defaulting to humor and
it's kind of not taking any credit. And it's the
kind of thing where I remember when I first realized
I was really good comic, and people would come backstage
and be like, oh my god. And this is like
twenty years in, so I already had built up confidence.
(28:10):
And at first, in the early days, they'd be like,
that was such a great set, and I'd go, yeah,
that audience was great. Well, twenty years later, when I
know I'm nailing it, you don't do the tiny show
thirteen times and not be decent at least And someone
would come backstage and always be a friend or a
relative and they'd go, oh my god, that audience was great,
(28:30):
and I'd literally say, you know why they were great
because I was fucking great, Because that audience would have
sat there like a bump on a cunt if I
had not been good. So why don't you rephrase that
fucking compliment and direct it right here? Like I would
get mad and I think I'm right, and he's a
star lady, So really, what they should have just said
(28:52):
was you were so good, and I would have been like, yeah, man,
and then i'd pro and weirdly enough, i'd probably then go, yeah,
I was good, brol So that was on fire. So
if I'm looping him in, So I don't think it
necessarily makes you sound conceited to give yourself a little credit.
Even if she said, oh my god, I'm so happy
you noticed because I've been working out and I lost
about ten pounds and I know weight isn't the goal,
(29:13):
but I feel better. That's a freaking nice way to
accept a compliment. Yeah, God, Barbara, get your shit together. Yeah,
fuck you, Celia can you can't? I mean, Celia's a
great lesson, and if she can do it, I mean
like anyone can. Literally, like literally, there's a lot wrong there.
Speaker 5 (29:32):
Literally got dropped on a mirror as a baby.
Speaker 3 (29:34):
I mean, did you look in it? Go ahead. Nick's
second letter, just.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
Kidding broke Okay, So hey, Lisa, Oh my name is
Kelly from Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
Speaker 3 (29:47):
I think a home of Arthur Fonzarelli, who could not
say the words I'm sorry. He could no, no, actually
he couldn't say I'm wrong. You can't say I'm sorry.
Me and Nick kep to work on the fact that
he can't apologize. Arthur Fonzarelli from Happy Days from Milwaukee.
She did, I did, Oh my god, you know, but
(30:11):
adding literally nothing to what I'm saying, both you and
Nick have to say I'm sorry to me right now?
Go ahead? Nick, Sorry, No, look me in the eyes
and that click you mean it? He makes the camera.
But do you even know where the camera is? How
is it my showing? I don't know where the cameras
(30:31):
are because I'm not conceded. There be no podcast about me.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
Anyway.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
So Arthur Fonzarelli could not say I was wrong. There
was many episodes where Richie Cunningham would say, but you
have to admit you're wrong, and he goes, okay, I
and he could never say the words why did I
bring this up? Because Milwaukee home of Henry Winkler fons
(31:03):
of Relly couldn't say they lost their trend of thought
like I just did. But that's not a thing. That's
hard to say. Thank you, no, and fuck? And I
was wrong. I need to write a book.
Speaker 2 (31:15):
You should.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
I don't want to. So who is it? Who's a
letter from?
Speaker 2 (31:20):
It's from Kelly?
Speaker 3 (31:21):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (31:21):
Hi, Kelly from Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
Speaker 3 (31:23):
Oh wait, didn't you go to school there? Oh no?
That was mad? I said, added nothing.
Speaker 2 (31:28):
Go ahead, blowjobs? All right? I think I am fishing
for compliments and I don't know how to stop it.
I'm a little overweight and I was just on a
ski trip with my friends. When we all get dressed
for the hot tub each day, I would look around
and see all my skinny friends and couldn't help but
say to them, uhugh, I'm so fat. Then when none
of them would say no, you aren't, I couldn't help
(31:49):
but feel upset. And then I felt annoying. I know
this is wrong, but I'm not sure how to stop it.
Speaker 3 (31:54):
Oh my god. Okay, so I can relate a little
because I remember I was in this month long food
rehab in Wickenberg, Arizona. I checked myself in Wickenberg area
though I checked myself in for compulsive eating treatment, and
this is so many years ago, and like everyone else
(32:15):
in the thing, I was the only fat ass. Everyone
else was an anorexic. And let's be honest, anorexics looks
really good in bathing suits. That's why you shouldn't compliment
people on weight loss, by the way, because you could
be encouraging that. So I remember they'd all be sitting
in the pool and I'd amber over to that fuck
and I'm wattle over there, look at like a water
(32:35):
buffalo in a Delta Burke swimsuit. And You're just like,
I'm not getting compliments. I'm not nailing it. So like
I can relate, and it feels like othered and you
feel like left out. But okay, I was thinking about this.
If some person who's inarguably in a bigger body, as
they say, said oh I'm so fat, I'm not gonna
(32:59):
disagree with them because it's not true. I would say,
what if I was one of those skinny cunts, I
would be like, Wow, I wish you wouldn't talk about
yourself that way. But I'm not gonna jump and say
you're not fat because you're fucking fat. And I don't
think it does anyone to deserve it. I think doesn't
do anyone as service to deflect from the issue. And
(33:20):
the real issue is the internalized hatred she has for herself.
And look who loses her because she ended up feeling embarrassed,
She felt needy, she felt like she was fishing. Nothing
feels worse than dealing my dress. Somebody like your dress,
like say, you know, actually I don't love it, right,
but I'm glad you do. That's a trick I learned,
(33:42):
No literally, my stylist one said. I said to the
stylist ones, what do you say to someone if they go,
do you like my hair? You just go, I'm so
glad you do. And it's just like, I know it's
really hard to tell, well, but are you really supposed
to lie? I lie to an old lady, a little
kid and a dog. A dog's cute, no matter what,
(34:02):
even if it's an ugly cute like Sarah Jessica Parker
ugly cute. But that's why Parker's named after Sarah Jessica
Parker my dog, because they're both ugly cute and way
five pounds. So, I mean, I don't know, what do
you think, Nick, I think it's hard. I think she
felt bad about herself and maybe if she'd say it
(34:22):
in a more genuine way and maybe they could focus
the conversation on her fixing the internal stuff, it would work.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
Yeah. I mean, I've definitely done this, especially in my
chubby state that I'm in right now. Anytime I do anything,
especially at work or whatever, I'll be like, oh God,
I'm so.
Speaker 3 (34:37):
Fat, and what do you wait? But what are you
hoping comes of that?
Speaker 2 (34:42):
I don't know. I just say it intuitively. I think
it's like a like again, a deflection of like not
being able to take a compliment like affection of like
oh you look good, oh well blah blah blah, like
me just I'm getting to the punchline before you.
Speaker 3 (34:56):
Like, yeah, I'm but it doesn't sound like you do
it for fishing. I don't like I could imagine you.
I bet like you know how You're really terrible in
bed from what I've heard. Like if a girl says, oh,
that was the best true that that was the best
sex of my life, and then you would deflect with
I could have done better, Like, and you're looking to
(35:18):
pull the cop of and I think it makes you
feel dirty? Sure, yeah, so I think that's what this
poor chick is up to. So I would tell her
to like look in word a little and be like,
why did I actually say that? Because ps, even if
they said no, you're not, it's not going to make
you feel better. No, because you're going to think they're
lying anyway.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yeah, nothing changes.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
Yeah, so I would say, don't go on ski trips
with skinny cunts. Yeah, find yourself some fet pitches and
hang out with them.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Stop living in Wisconsin. Yeah, just cut it out.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
Just what I hate her?
Speaker 2 (35:49):
If you want to go to college there, fine, no
one likes you.
Speaker 3 (35:54):
Back to wait. We got one more, go ahead and.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
No more last one, Dear Lisa. I wore this cool
shirt I bought on eBay.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
Oh I love eBay now that I'm into sustainable fashion,
I totally really god Oh sorry, I don't wear the
same black T shirt every baby because black slimming.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
Not really, I guess. I wore this cool shirt I
bought on eBay yesterday and so many people complimented me
on it every time I said, thanks, it's twenty five
dollars on eBay. Yeah, why do I have to point
it out that it was cheap? Am I bragging? I
know I'm not the only one who does this. Thanks
Sophia from Boston, Massachusetts.
Speaker 3 (36:35):
Oh, that put a whole different spin on it, of
Bostonian because she's racist.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
Right.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
No, here's what I think. I don't think that's bad,
and I'll tell you why. Yes, it is deflecting a little.
And did she say she says thanks first? Thanks, I
got it on eBay.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Says.
Speaker 3 (36:54):
I think she's covered because I think the twenty five
The thank you says thank you, You've said the right thing,
and I hear your compliment. The other part is like
showing what a thrifty good shopper you are. I don't
think it's cheap. I think it's really fun. I love
to brag about buying secondhand because it makes me look
more woke and I want everyone to know that I
(37:16):
am like as blue as my fucking hair, So I
want them to know that sustainability is a blue trait,
so you know, you know your politics, you see it
coming when it comes to me. So I think maybe
with her, it's just a cool brag on her part.
I love a little humble brag.
Speaker 2 (37:32):
Yeah, blue hair and blue balls over.
Speaker 3 (37:34):
No, you were thinking of that and not listening to
what I said. React to what I said, You freaking dopey.
Here's the word blue and has like he's the first
one to ever have that fucking reference. God almighty, it's new. No,
but don't you think she's just adding like a good
trait of herself, like frugality and like, oh my god,
look at how I get proud when I search for
something and find it, Like say, Nick was even gayer
(37:58):
than we think he is, and he like gayer even
still for Sabrina Carpenter and I found him a kick
ass Sabrina Carpenter tore t shirt in a size xxxxxxx
L and I was like, oh my god, Nick, look
twenty five on eBay. I got it for you. Like
that's a brag on me, Like, look at how I
nailed it.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
Yeah, I think it'd be worse if she was like,
oh my god, I love this shirt like thanks, it
was actually two hundred dollars.
Speaker 3 (38:22):
That down, thank you. That's the shitty person. I used
to have a friend who would always do that. He
would go like, oh my god, I like your shoes
and he need'd go Gucci and I'd be like that
totally takes away from the compliment. Plus it makes you
appear like you can only if you have to brag
you're wearing Gucci. That's the one pair you can afford.
(38:43):
And you should never buy a pair of Gucci shoes.
If you can't afford ten, you're obviously out outside of
your league. You're actually just devaluing everything.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
I couldn't spend six hundred tow one thousand dollars on
a pair of sneakers. That's fucking insane.
Speaker 3 (38:59):
Certainly not the subject of anything we're talking about. I'm sorry.
Gucci shoes are a lot more than that.
Speaker 2 (39:07):
No, I know, but like even that, what the what
are we doing here?
Speaker 3 (39:11):
Well? No, I as someone who like has been through
all that and knows you get no meaning out of it.
I know it's all bullshit and it doesn't fix anything internally,
Like it's literally you could put what do they call
a silk purse on a You can't make a silk
cat on a pig. It's a silk cat on a pig.
Like you still hate yourself despite your You're a well
(39:33):
dressed asshole in a Gucci star gunt.
Speaker 2 (39:41):
You know why, let's start a gunt.
Speaker 5 (39:44):
I will not stand for the hate for my favorite sustainable.
Speaker 3 (39:50):
It's not sustainable. I open that you guys aren't gonna
know what we're talking about. But miss things Celia labeled
up the other day and you have a big fat
ghani across her fucking big tits, And I'm like, why
do I have to be drawn to look there? First
of all, I'm a woman hat. Second again one.
Speaker 2 (40:11):
Not better, not better, old hat, titsilly.
Speaker 3 (40:16):
Titsy hat. Her tits are as big as her head
than they used to be. Is that a compliment? I
guess I think it is just say thank you. Oh
my god, our tits are shrinking over here. Oh my god.
We have nothing, we have learned nothing. We have learned
to say fucking thank you to fucking If you've bought
(40:36):
something cheap and want to brag about it, enjoy yourself.
We also, at the end of most episodes, we have
time do Lisa's fuck up of the week, and I
was like searching my head. I'm like, I'm so perfect physically,
(40:56):
emotionally and spiritually. What good? What a course? Then I
have to do something on our break that is like, oh,
I fucked up. There's a girl here who works in
promotion and iHeart who's super hot and sexy, and I
know that Nick has a little thing for her. But
instead of letting it unfold naturally, when she comes in
(41:19):
to say hi and be like, oh do you remember Nick,
I go, he has a crush out and you he
really like and stop him like I it's like, then
puts it like where Now it's jokey and like if
you really wanted a chance to flirt, maybe I fucked
it up, So I apologize. Did I fuck up? Was
that having a fuck up on my part? Do you think?
Or did I make it lighter? Or what do you think?
Speaker 2 (41:40):
Tune in next week we'll find that.
Speaker 3 (41:42):
No, do you think, Celia, do you think it's bad
to like sort of be like he likes You'll really?
Oh so I'm just being hard on myself. Yes, And
would you say that I'm like so perfect?
Speaker 5 (41:55):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (41:55):
Oh my good? Thank you?
Speaker 2 (41:58):
Speaking of yourself be gonna get in hard.
Speaker 3 (42:03):
Do you see how we illustrated nicely in exchange of
a nice compliment and a thank you. Let's do it
again for the people who didn't hear because Nick was
deflecting with his rare brand of blue humor. So would
you say I'm emotionally and physically nailing it, Celia? I
absolutely would thank you, You're welcome, but really I'm still
(42:28):
working on it. That's definitely Nick. All Right, you guys,
listen if you agree that I'm emotionally, physically and universally
and bilaterally and intellectually perfect, Tune in again next episode
for Shrink This with Lisa Lampinelli and Nick once again.
Where can the people find y'all?
Speaker 2 (42:47):
You could follow me at nick Scopes on Instagram and
TikTok and it's all one app is you know what?
Speaker 3 (43:00):
Because don't you sometimes jerk off in your food and
eat it? Order cock? I mean, if you type in
cock onub, I wonder what comes up.
Speaker 2 (43:10):
It's gotta be an Asian place, Chicken place.
Speaker 3 (43:13):
That's a fair. If you mean dick, what do you
think comes up a dick somewhere?
Speaker 2 (43:19):
Egg plant parm?
Speaker 3 (43:21):
Egg plant parm? God, Nick, this is why look how funny?
How funny?
Speaker 5 (43:28):
What are you.
Speaker 3 (43:28):
Supposed to say?
Speaker 2 (43:30):
Funny?
Speaker 3 (43:34):
I give up, he's learned nothing. Nick, say our lovely
outro for the show that I really am above the
pay grade of saying all.
Speaker 2 (43:41):
Right, thanks for listening. Be sure to email us your
questions at shrink the Show at gmail.
Speaker 3 (43:46):
You know I got to interrupt. You always sound like
half a fucking numbskull. You read like I thought you said.
Speaker 2 (43:53):
I was, okay, spider better falling it?
Speaker 3 (43:56):
Okay, well, freeballing and I'll see if you have all.
Speaker 2 (43:58):
For listening, be sure to email us at shrink This
Show at gmail dot com. That is, Shrink this Show
at gmail dot com. Follow Lisa on socials at Lisa Lampinelli,
follow me at Nick Scopes on all the fucking social
media shit, and make sure to listen to Shrink This
on your iHeartRadio app or wherever you get podcasts. We
(44:19):
don't care.
Speaker 3 (44:20):
We don't care as long as you do the iHeart
download these others. They're they're capitalists, yes, not iHeart. It's
a charity, yes, it's one of those. All the money
go directly to fix Max's brain tumor dot com.
Speaker 2 (44:34):
Where's the marketing department. Let's go find this girl.
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