Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
firms minute Morning Show. You know, we want to make
it very clear you hear things on the fifteen minute
Morning Show, you will never ever hear on the big show.
And sometimes you will, but we release things early here
(00:26):
on the fifteen minute Morning Show happens, So you should
talk about why my face hurts. Okay. I was injected
with toxins yesterday, Yes, right there in the forehead around
the eyes. So it's gonna take a few days for
it to do its thing. So until then, I'm just
gonna sit here and wait for it to kick in.
I think you can already see a difference in you can.
(00:48):
They put some filler in there so you can see
a little difference. Filler in your forehead. I got filler forehead,
They do that. Yeah, they got filler, Yeah, up there,
because you know, I've got creases there no matter what,
So even when the toxins kick in, I'll still have creases,
so that that'll kind of fill it in. Yes, David,
that makes sense. Now. I thought you weren't laughing at
my jokes, but you just can't. It takes it takes
(01:10):
like four days for this stuff to kick in so
I can still show emotion. Oh damn it. It was
great though. I'll get into who did it and why
and all that stuff in a few days when I
when I'm ready to, you know, okay, yeah, I can
tell the difference too. Want to get right in the
middle of my forehead. I was told that if you
get right there, it kind of changes that whole area.
I'm afraid. I'm afraid if I start, I'm going to
(01:32):
get addicted. How long is it? How long does it
what are your microphone zone on? Scary? How long does
it last? Several months? I think if you get it
done again, so you have to keep going. Well, if
you don't have to, you can do it if you want,
if you want that same look, I don't know. I
just want to do something different, do it. I just
sat in there and they just pumped my face full
of toxins. It was great. Remember when that used to
(01:53):
be taboo and nobody, Oh, don't talk about you. You
don't get that done. Now people even even younger than
me in their twenties, they get it done because it's preventative. Yes,
so what are you gonna do? So it's hard? Little secret.
I know a ton of friends that started in their twenties. Yeah,
my cousins do what I said to them. I don't understand.
She's like, it's preventative. I'm like, and I think on
(02:13):
August five, my birthday, she's gonna slap some in my
head make me grow hair. Okay, no, Lie, I want
to get hair plugs now, just to You've got lots
of hair, I know, but I want more. Apparently they
take plasma from me than they injected in my head.
And I don't know. I don't know. This is like
a she's like a magician's I will formally introduce you
to her because she would love to see you all.
(02:35):
She's fabulous anywhere from the stage not far. What's up
things for hair? So, George the barber has this thing
where you spray it and in like in different areas
and little flakes of hair. It's hair in a can.
Have you seen that. It's a topic. It's been around
for a thousand No. But if it rains on your head,
(02:56):
doesn't it drip down yet? Or if you sweat right area? Wait,
and there's another thing that I've seen. Now, so they
shave the top of your head right and then what
happens is they blue something down and then they put
this like a whole like real hair on top of
your Oh no no, no, no, no, no no, it's
(03:16):
a whole new style. It's like a modern day dupe.
And then they can know and then they can like
shave lines into it and do all kinds of like
bufanti stuff with something like you can do all kinds
of crazy stuff with your hair. I'm not kidding. Do
you remember his band Charlie? But they can. It's a
whole new thing now. A lot of the ballroom band's
(03:39):
totally different to pe is when you're bald and you
put a hairpiece on your right, they shave your head
and they put a piece of hair. Yeah, it's like
putting a bath mat on the floor, not like an
old man's like like a freak RANI our friend had
that formerly known as bald well No, then he then
he said this is itchy. I can't take this anymore.
And then he because it's a two pay it's the
(04:00):
same thing. Look, this is glued to your so are
two page? Well that sounds sexy really off alright, So anyway,
so any other secrets we want to divulge, am I
the only one who's just not embarrassed to say anything.
If I had something, I would say if any of
us needed that. I got laser hair removal everywhere in
the face. Are you? Are you Harry? Oh god, yes,
(04:23):
I'm Indian. Hello. It doesn't like this from my head,
I got one. Yes, you got one. Following off of Gandhi.
I tried it from my butt crack. Didn't didn't work,
didn't work. My friend did it on her crack and
it works. Show us like the position you were in
physically you're flat like this, and you put a little
pillow in like your like your crotch area, so your
(04:44):
butts raised. What conversation are you having with the technician
while this is going on? Very awkward? Well that's up part.
I guess you have to shave before you get it done, right,
You don't, You don't know. I had to shave me.
The shaved the laser looks for the follicle like somebody
else laser their ask, Danielle, but my hair is so
(05:04):
thick back there. I really had to. Really, you have
a Harry booty and hang out of Harry as you do. Yeah, yeah,
I know that has to be problematic with like whooping. Yeah,
it's not here. He there. It's like Harry and diagram. Okay,
who else wants to admit if it was that Harry
hat to cut it like trim it before you get it,
then maybe, but it didn't work on you. Who else
(05:26):
is embarrassing something you want to admit? I stopped shaving
my whole body in college because of swimming. So but yeah,
I was hairless the entire time up until college. That
makes sense, Okay about now? No, I it got too
tedious to do. Yeah, I do it once a week.
It's not you know, usually Thursdays my day days. Shave
everything off Thursdays. When planted, it hurts my smile. I
(05:49):
want to do that thing where they suck the fat
out of your stomach and put it in different parts
of Yeah, that'd be cool. I want to I want
to get this fat stucked out of my stomach and
put my butt. Come on, scary, I have a curve
to my penis. Try on, I got memorious slightly to
the right. It's slight rights like lean over. I'm telling
(06:10):
you sometimes it works out. That's good. When you try
me points towards the passenger, say it's not a curve.
It's not right. It's a it's a gradual. It's not
a hard right, it's a soft you know when Scary
(06:31):
leans over. Now we're all going to think about it.
I'm not what's the matter. I'm not either said to
share something that I did and you never said it.
Twenty four years working here and I'm telling you, piss hi.
My name is Scary. I have a curved penis high Scary.
It's a slight curve. Do you have to face like
(06:52):
eleven o'clock on a clock when you pee a your
and also goes straight? Yes, it's not like that. It's
not like that. If it's flaccid, I'm sure no, okay,
So can I ask him an appy question? At okay?
So when it is not flash that is it still curved?
(07:13):
It's not when it's not curved, when it's not a curve.
So when you go when you get excited, it doesn't
go straight, it goes to it goes to one o'clock
instead of twelve. How many degrees if we had a
protractor at which point doesn't one o'clock on the three
o'clock is ninety? It's maybe is it like fifteen or
(07:33):
fifteen grades three quarters of it doesn't cook? When does
it hook? She broken on me? She broken on us,
direction broken broken on you know what we were doing.
(07:54):
And all of a sudden she came down too hard.
I'm like, and it was the balcony. What did you do?
You broke? Did your broke? Did you go to the hospital?
I did not? It was like, but it did. Yeah,
it's tearing like different color like in that like an area,
(08:15):
almost as if like all the all the like blood
cells in that area like broke. You know, recover. It
took a couple of months and now we're good to go.
I mean, it definitely works. I make two kids. You
know what I thought? You said it goes one? No,
no not. My ship is good dead on god. If
(08:38):
I go in, I'm going in, all right, thank you.
But I'm gonna get back to scary. When you're having sex?
Do you hit the H spot? Yeah? Like, how does
it look? Where does it have? Let me ask you a
a question. Your your wiener leans to the right. How
about politically do you do you read lean to the
(09:02):
right like your penis? Penis is my pen I don't
talk politics, you know that he only talks penises. So Daniel,
you haven't admitted anything. I had my nose done, I
had my boobs done. That thyroid cancer. I mean yeah,
I'm kind of like the word's next. I don't know.
And that's why I'm afraid to start like anything you're
getting done, because I'm afraid of men get addicted to it. No,
(09:23):
no, no no, no no, you won't be addicted to the
toxins in your face, like I need anything yet. Do
you know what's going into your face? Yeah, it's toxin yeh,
yeah it is. It's not botoxes. Botox is a brand.
It's a different brand. I did have something in my
armpits because I had like after I had my boobs reduced.
As I grabbed them, they there was a little bit
(09:45):
of fat they're still which is still they're didn't really
do anything and they stick like some kind of a
chemical they to try to reduce the fat. Okabella kibella.
I did that. Yeah, it sounds like another toxic. It's
like a fat melter. Yeah. I want to get it
in my double and triple chins. Yeah. It didn't do
for me. My arm pits so swollen for the time,
like until it went back to normal. They were really swollen.
(10:07):
I'll tell you what I mean. I was in the
chair for at least I mean a good forty five minutes.
I mean it was all sorts of injections everywhere, but everywhere.
You really won't see the fruits of my injections. For
like I said, another few days, did you do just
your faces, your hands, if you have like clammy hands
(10:29):
under arms talks, get that crow talks. Definitely get an
injection in my penis if I could, I would do
that for what it was, to make it a little
bit bigger, like wider. Don't do that now they say,
they say it can come out to Oh yeah, up,
didn't there's some guy that dies. You don't want lumpy Wineryeah,
(10:50):
I don't want to win used to do the afternoon
did traffic. It's like out traffic with lumpy winer. Lumpy
weiner is almost as bad as curved because after a
woman gives birth, you know the area is a little
bit wider, so then you know you want to make it.
So if I can make mind fatter, pect it usually
goes back to the way. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Pardon me,
(11:12):
pardon me, pardon me. Are you man's plaining, are you
really telling us about the vagina? It does? His wife. No, No,
I'm something honest, it does. It's like a basketball down.
It doesn't go back and went back. Well, maybe you're
you're amazing. You're like lying, yeah, it doesn't, it doesn't.
(11:32):
There's a little bit of room, a little bit of
gap room. So you're saying they call it. They actually
call it that used to call it the husband stitch. Yeah,
it's right, right, which is so like, really you And again,
I did get down after the babies because I ripped, right,
everybody does stuff you won't hear on the big SHO.
That was awesome. I just remember them saying with the
(11:53):
second kid with why I ripped with the first, but
with the second they said, I said, you know, we
gotta put that back together. Really I didn't think it
was kind of it's like he doesn't want to come yet,
I'm gonna go home. And then the doctors no, no no, no, no,
he's he's fine, and I'm like, no, so I said,
I don't think the epidurals working. So he punked my
leg with like a sharp object. He goes, can you
(12:13):
here feel this? I said no, So well it's just
his head is so big, that's why. That's why you
can feel it down there. I'm like, you gotta be
fucking couldn't me. So then he said, oh, we're going
to have to cut you. And that's like when they're
down there sewing you up at the end, after it's
all said and done, they're down there for so long,
(12:35):
you're thinking, what the hell good? Let him? Let him
take their time. Did they cut like my whole but open? Like?
What did they do? Like they cut your whole open?
They were down there long enough. Well, they want to
be careful because they don't want to cause a lot
of damage. I was amazed, amaze, And now it's right
back torm. Is it safe to say that none of
(12:56):
this will be talked about on the Big Show? None
of what could I would somebody just said that, by
the way, it's part of life, all right. Well, so
there you go, Brody, you haven't admitted anything to us. Well,
I clearly need a lot of work. I just haven't
had any. Well, Brodie and Garrett never admit I have
too many surgeries for the things that are wrong with
(13:16):
me to get any corrective. This doesn't have to be
body related. It could be anything related, stuff that you
just don't want to bring up because it's just you know,
you don't want to reveal too much. How was your secrets? Oh?
I was in Portland, Maine a couple of weeks ago.
I had a martini, got a third drunk for you.
That's to put it down. If Brodie was a flavor,
(13:39):
it would be vanilla. I wish by the way you Gandhi,
you really piste off a lot of people today. Storm.
I mean, it's one thing not to prefer vanilla. It's
another thing to insult those who do. I wasn't really
insulting them. Yeah, that vanilla people are called vanilla people
for a reason because it's a boring flavor like van
(14:00):
Maybe another person I find that offensive. You don't call oh,
she's so chocolate, right, I can call that he is
so rocky road? What a mint chocolate tip person? So
have we accomplished anything? It's been invisible here? What did
I say? I said shaped my old body, my balls,
my legs, my jest. What I want to hear about
the days when you worked at that country club in
(14:21):
Staten Island with the rich one where the old ladies
drowned And I tried that they wanted to make out
with them. You're making out with dead, drowned ladies. I
would be a lifeguard and when when someone says I'm drowning,
So all the ladies would come to the club and
get drunk and they would want to do you. Yes,
pretty much. Did you do any of them? No, you
didn't do one of them. No. Never did you call
Did you call the old ladies that have been neah,
(14:43):
it's a base. Did you call the old ladies by
their first names? Is to turn them on a little bit?
What I called them Mrs Blake? Okay, could sugar mom over?
Of course? I could have been very wealthy. Can we
get into your I wish you had juice? Your lifeguard stories,
fifteen minute morning show off