March 3, 2025 • 9 mins
Cat puke, nightmares, and deadlines - oh my!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Put your heads together, and we're going to start to
party and start part I'm ready to party the Elvis
Duran After Party.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
It's the After Party Podcast. We're all here. Let's start
the podcast off with a call. What do you say? Yeah, well,
this is new. I hope the phones work me too.
They never work you see if they go on line
nineteen scary. Let's see if Tim's there?
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Hello Tim, Hello, good morning lady. How are you?
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Good morning lady?
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Oh lady?
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Hey, so Tim, oh lady, we saw your text message.
I loved it. May I read it out loud?
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Absolutely?
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Lady? Yes, okay, good.
Speaker 4 (00:46):
I'm on my way to work now and have a
report to at seven o'clock that I now will have
about twenty minutes to complete.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Using chat jeppt to get me through it. Oh that's good.
You can use that. Isn't that okay to use that? Guys?
Speaker 3 (00:59):
It depends on the.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Can we back up a little bit? Why I want
to know about this catvomit? Did you know it was there?
Speaker 3 (01:07):
Or no? Let me let me let me actually back
up a little bit further from when I went to
bed and had nightmares all night long, like I was
trapped in the night of the Museum movie, and I
kept waking up, like you have those nightmares, of those
(01:29):
dreams that are so real that you like wake up
out of the dead sleep and you have to wonder
was it really real or not? Right?
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yeah, I love and hate those Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
Yes, exactly. So that kept happening all night long. I
would wake up and freak out and then get back
to bed and my dream would pick well, my nightmare
would pick right back up where it left off. So
I yeah, it's great, you know, happy Monday to me.
So I get up after my last nightmare and I'm like, okay,
(01:59):
I'm just getting I got to get to work early anyway,
try to finish this report. How am I going to
get it done? YadA, YadA, YadA. I roll out of
bed and feel that warm, squishy substance under your foot
that is like you're stepping on a pile of noodles,
and I'm still not awake, and I'm like, what the
(02:24):
hell is that? And I'm thinking, well, maybe it's just
part of the namemare. Maybe I'm really not awake yet.
So I reached down and grab this conglomeration of hair
and vomit and cat spit deep into my hand, make
it to the bathroom, brush it down the toilet, washing
(02:46):
my feet. But now I'm getting in the shower and
I'm even more stressed out because I have this report due.
I'm having to spend ten extra minutes cleaning my carpet
from where the cap vomited. And uh, okay, it was there.
Speaker 4 (03:04):
It was everywhere, and I don't know a place that
it wasn't, Tim Tim Tim Daniel is she's throwing up
in the trash car.
Speaker 5 (03:12):
I have cats down, but I've never reached down to
grab it.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
Oh my, I'm telling you I was not like I said.
I wasn't. Only I thought I was still maybe asleep,
trapped in this nightmare. But it wasn't a nightmare.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
What's worstim, if it's if it's hot or warm cat
hairball vomit you step on, or if it's cold because
it's been there all night.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
You know, I'm gonna say, And it's worse that's it's
hot or warm, because if it's cold, then you then
you had time to congeal a little bit.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
The worst is if.
Speaker 5 (03:52):
They do it in the place that you don't know
the hair ball and you and you don't know they
did it and you find it days later. It's this
crusty thing.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
Just there that Well, now that we've run all of
our listeners off, let's get back to the story. So, so,
now that you've tried to get yourself together and you
rush to work as you have this report, do you
decided to use chat GPT?
Speaker 3 (04:15):
I thought about it. I thought about it, and I
was trying to look up a company policy on using
AI at our workplace, and I couldn't quite nail it down.
There is so we have a pretty tight policy against it.
The only thing we're allowed to use is uh, Microsoft Copilot,
(04:36):
and that was that wasn't going to get me anywhere.
I mean, I thought if I had time to just
you know, maybe whip it up real quick on chat GPT,
I would it would save me. But I just said,
hell of And just I've been sitting down going through
it and sending off the emails of why hasn't this
(04:58):
been sent? You know this was do at seven am? Well, yeah, yes, yes,
I'm quite well aware of that.
Speaker 4 (05:04):
Actually, I bet I bet Tim if you told them
the cat hairball vomit story, that would probably get you
buy you some time.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Do you think you know in today's day and age,
that's got to be the substitute for the doggate the
homework I was, I mean, don't know any other way
around it.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
How did you get through this?
Speaker 3 (05:26):
So I absolutely I pushed myself back from my desk
for a while and just started basically hysterically laughing, like comically,
like so overwhelmed that you know, it just becomes a comedy.
It becomes a sketch show at that point where you know,
you you reach and you grip and you claw so
(05:49):
hard to you know, to do everything you've got to
get done. And then it just comes to a point
where I think you realize, hey, look this isn't going
to happen, and like the comedian or the comedy part
in me takes over and it just makes me laugh.
And I've just been laughing like the last twenty minutes,
like what a day. You know, not only is it Monday,
(06:11):
but this is how it started and this is how
it's going. I mean, I'm just ready for the next
big adventure today. I'm just gonna keep a smile on
my face and try to roll through it. That's all
I can do.
Speaker 4 (06:23):
Yeah, I see, you know, just been the wheels of
bodily fluids.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Let's see what you're gonna step on next.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
I guess yeah, I love.
Speaker 4 (06:31):
That though, you know, you do have to just stop
and laugh sometimes, even if even if there's blood spurting
across the room and you've got a juggular, you know
what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
Sometimes Yeah, yeah, I mean sometimes it's just a mere
flesh loan exactly. I mean, you know, a great coworker
of mine told me an awesome saying that we actually
posted in our cubicle of last week, and it says
our problems are only as big as we make them.
(07:02):
And I tell you, you know, I guess if stepping
on a cat hairball and being late on an expense
report is my biggest problem in twenty twenty five, it's
not really that big of a problem, is it, you know.
I mean it's first world problems.
Speaker 4 (07:20):
Actually, you know, I think it's an excellent way of
looking at it. I mean, shouldn't we all be a
little more like Tim when we get pissed off? We
get pissed off at these little things? Yeah, gandhi, what
I just we've.
Speaker 6 (07:30):
All had a pet and you hear that sound in
the middle of the night, and you shoot up the
fact that you did not wake up while the cat
was hairball puking next to you, like it's very serious
and points to the fact that your nightmare must have
been horrible. So you really did get screwed on like every.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Level this morning.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
Absolutely. I mean not only did I have the mummy
attack in me, I had Dracula biting me. I had
I got stabbed by some sort of unicorn horn after
the Mummy broke out of the tomb and knocked over
a big statue. It was crazy, It was crazy. It
(08:06):
was like this all night long.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
You have huge, wonderful dreams and nightmares. I want those.
Speaker 4 (08:11):
Mine are boring compared to your, you know.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
And that's the that's the sad thing, you know. None unfortunately, No,
I mean.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
All right, do me a favor next next, next time
you have a morning like today, would you please text
us again because you're just a total joy to talk to.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
We love you, and I hope you have a great
day today.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
Absolutely, I'll do it. Thank you very much, you have
a great day as well.
Speaker 4 (08:38):
All right, let's hear it for Tim and his hairball
vomit filled toes.
Speaker 6 (08:45):
Sort of sounds like Danielle though, Okay, that's what your
answer sounds like.
Speaker 4 (08:50):
The night daniel has been coughing up hairballs all these years.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Augusta Ran after party
Speaker 3 (09:05):
M
Put your heads together, and we're going to start to
party and start part I'm ready to party the Elvis
Duran After Party.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
It's the After Party Podcast. We're all here. Let's start
the podcast off with a call. What do you say? Yeah, well,
this is new. I hope the phones work me too.
They never work you see if they go on line
nineteen scary. Let's see if Tim's there?
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Hello Tim, Hello, good morning lady. How are you?
Speaker 2 (00:35):
Good morning lady?
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Oh lady?
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Hey, so Tim, oh lady, we saw your text message.
I loved it. May I read it out loud?
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Absolutely?
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Lady? Yes, okay, good.
Speaker 4 (00:46):
I'm on my way to work now and have a
report to at seven o'clock that I now will have
about twenty minutes to complete.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Using chat jeppt to get me through it. Oh that's good.
You can use that. Isn't that okay to use that? Guys?
Speaker 3 (00:59):
It depends on the.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Can we back up a little bit? Why I want
to know about this catvomit? Did you know it was there?
Speaker 3 (01:07):
Or no? Let me let me let me actually back
up a little bit further from when I went to
bed and had nightmares all night long, like I was
trapped in the night of the Museum movie, and I
kept waking up, like you have those nightmares, of those
(01:29):
dreams that are so real that you like wake up
out of the dead sleep and you have to wonder
was it really real or not? Right?
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yeah, I love and hate those Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:39):
Yes, exactly. So that kept happening all night long. I
would wake up and freak out and then get back
to bed and my dream would pick well, my nightmare
would pick right back up where it left off. So
I yeah, it's great, you know, happy Monday to me.
So I get up after my last nightmare and I'm like, okay,
(01:59):
I'm just getting I got to get to work early anyway,
try to finish this report. How am I going to
get it done? YadA, YadA, YadA. I roll out of
bed and feel that warm, squishy substance under your foot
that is like you're stepping on a pile of noodles,
and I'm still not awake, and I'm like, what the
(02:24):
hell is that? And I'm thinking, well, maybe it's just
part of the namemare. Maybe I'm really not awake yet.
So I reached down and grab this conglomeration of hair
and vomit and cat spit deep into my hand, make
it to the bathroom, brush it down the toilet, washing
(02:46):
my feet. But now I'm getting in the shower and
I'm even more stressed out because I have this report due.
I'm having to spend ten extra minutes cleaning my carpet
from where the cap vomited. And uh, okay, it was there.
Speaker 4 (03:04):
It was everywhere, and I don't know a place that
it wasn't, Tim Tim Tim Daniel is she's throwing up
in the trash car.
Speaker 5 (03:12):
I have cats down, but I've never reached down to
grab it.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
Oh my, I'm telling you I was not like I said.
I wasn't. Only I thought I was still maybe asleep,
trapped in this nightmare. But it wasn't a nightmare.
Speaker 4 (03:27):
What's worstim, if it's if it's hot or warm cat
hairball vomit you step on, or if it's cold because
it's been there all night.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
You know, I'm gonna say, And it's worse that's it's
hot or warm, because if it's cold, then you then
you had time to congeal a little bit.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
The worst is if.
Speaker 5 (03:52):
They do it in the place that you don't know
the hair ball and you and you don't know they
did it and you find it days later. It's this
crusty thing.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
Just there that Well, now that we've run all of
our listeners off, let's get back to the story. So, so,
now that you've tried to get yourself together and you
rush to work as you have this report, do you
decided to use chat GPT?
Speaker 3 (04:15):
I thought about it. I thought about it, and I
was trying to look up a company policy on using
AI at our workplace, and I couldn't quite nail it down.
There is so we have a pretty tight policy against it.
The only thing we're allowed to use is uh, Microsoft Copilot,
(04:36):
and that was that wasn't going to get me anywhere.
I mean, I thought if I had time to just
you know, maybe whip it up real quick on chat GPT,
I would it would save me. But I just said,
hell of And just I've been sitting down going through
it and sending off the emails of why hasn't this
(04:58):
been sent? You know this was do at seven am? Well, yeah, yes, yes,
I'm quite well aware of that.
Speaker 4 (05:04):
Actually, I bet I bet Tim if you told them
the cat hairball vomit story, that would probably get you
buy you some time.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Do you think you know in today's day and age,
that's got to be the substitute for the doggate the
homework I was, I mean, don't know any other way
around it.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
How did you get through this?
Speaker 3 (05:26):
So I absolutely I pushed myself back from my desk
for a while and just started basically hysterically laughing, like comically,
like so overwhelmed that you know, it just becomes a comedy.
It becomes a sketch show at that point where you know,
you you reach and you grip and you claw so
(05:49):
hard to you know, to do everything you've got to
get done. And then it just comes to a point
where I think you realize, hey, look this isn't going
to happen, and like the comedian or the comedy part
in me takes over and it just makes me laugh.
And I've just been laughing like the last twenty minutes,
like what a day. You know, not only is it Monday,
(06:11):
but this is how it started and this is how
it's going. I mean, I'm just ready for the next
big adventure today. I'm just gonna keep a smile on
my face and try to roll through it. That's all
I can do.
Speaker 4 (06:23):
Yeah, I see, you know, just been the wheels of
bodily fluids.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Let's see what you're gonna step on next.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
I guess yeah, I love.
Speaker 4 (06:31):
That though, you know, you do have to just stop
and laugh sometimes, even if even if there's blood spurting
across the room and you've got a juggular, you know
what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
Sometimes Yeah, yeah, I mean sometimes it's just a mere
flesh loan exactly. I mean, you know, a great coworker
of mine told me an awesome saying that we actually
posted in our cubicle of last week, and it says
our problems are only as big as we make them.
(07:02):
And I tell you, you know, I guess if stepping
on a cat hairball and being late on an expense
report is my biggest problem in twenty twenty five, it's
not really that big of a problem, is it, you know.
I mean it's first world problems.
Speaker 4 (07:20):
Actually, you know, I think it's an excellent way of
looking at it. I mean, shouldn't we all be a
little more like Tim when we get pissed off? We
get pissed off at these little things? Yeah, gandhi, what
I just we've.
Speaker 6 (07:30):
All had a pet and you hear that sound in
the middle of the night, and you shoot up the
fact that you did not wake up while the cat
was hairball puking next to you, like it's very serious
and points to the fact that your nightmare must have
been horrible. So you really did get screwed on like every.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Level this morning.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
Absolutely. I mean not only did I have the mummy
attack in me, I had Dracula biting me. I had
I got stabbed by some sort of unicorn horn after
the Mummy broke out of the tomb and knocked over
a big statue. It was crazy, It was crazy. It
(08:06):
was like this all night long.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
You have huge, wonderful dreams and nightmares. I want those.
Speaker 4 (08:11):
Mine are boring compared to your, you know.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
And that's the that's the sad thing, you know. None unfortunately, No,
I mean.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
All right, do me a favor next next, next time
you have a morning like today, would you please text
us again because you're just a total joy to talk to.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
We love you, and I hope you have a great
day today.
Speaker 3 (08:34):
Absolutely, I'll do it. Thank you very much, you have
a great day as well.
Speaker 4 (08:38):
All right, let's hear it for Tim and his hairball
vomit filled toes.
Speaker 6 (08:45):
Sort of sounds like Danielle though, Okay, that's what your
answer sounds like.
Speaker 4 (08:50):
The night daniel has been coughing up hairballs all these years.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Augusta Ran after party
Speaker 3 (09:05):
M
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