Road Rage

We find out someone on the show might be a worse driver than our Danielle?!?! Skeery and Brody talk about how to be a "NY" driver.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
phone show? All right, is everybody ready? Yeah, We've got
a lot of stuff about to boil. I can't wait
to have this podcast. I love it when we're about

(00:23):
to start a break or the podcast and I have
to go stop it, save it because a lot of
times you guys just bust your nut and it's over,
and then we try and get it on the air
again and it just doesn't have you. I mean, bust
a nut. You bust that nut and it's opening blow.
We'll talk about things, Okay, So let's start with Hey, Andrew,

(00:47):
are you out there? We need a COVID update. So
everybody that travel to Vegas and then people that came
into contact here, we all did COVID tests here in
the studio and uh it was what five six tests?
You did? Yeah? Five four tests and then three downstairs.

(01:07):
Can't hear Andrew? Hello? You you're shitting at the wrong mike.
That will never work. Oh Jesus for the love of ship,
so important what you just said. Okay, Hi everybody, Hi,
okay to you. Okay, So we did seven tests. Yeah,
out of the seven scary didn't test um seven of
us have tested negative is the most important? What scary

(01:34):
is the most important to test? I did shove that
ship up my nose? Come on, all right, well we're
gonna need thirty minutes and this is only a fifty minute.
We'll post an update on Instagram. Yeah, do you want
to get tested? I don't care. Yeah, I've been testing
five times in the past week and a half that
I'm negative every time. Let's bring the temper down, just

(01:58):
wasting test test point. Apparently garlic kills COVID. This doesn't
make any sense to me. How many times are we
going to test? They will find out you're pregnant if
we test. Okay, well, well Andrews doing that? I think
we wanted to talk about driving day. Yes, yes, and
I want to ask all my friends here what they do.

(02:18):
So uh, we've all parallel parked before correct many times
when you're pulling back into a spot. Do you what
do you use? Do you use your blinker your left
or right blinker or do you put your hazards on blinker? Right?
People where you're going? Hey, Diamond, what do you use?
You gotta talk? I um put on my hazards. Who

(02:47):
you're in trouble? Yeah, exactly. So let's take it to
last week. So Diamond, I saw a spot on the
street as Gandhi and I were driving into work, and
I saw a car that put their hazards on. So
I said, oh, I have a spot I can drive into.
As I'm ready to get into the spot, MS Diamond
with her hazards are backing up into the spot, almost crashing.
I go, who taught you that? She goes, that's what

(03:09):
you're supposed to do. No, that was what you're supposed
to do if your call broke down. It's what you're
supposed to do if you're backing up and turning into
a spot. No, well, I don't know. I may side
with Diamond only in one instance, if it's kind of
a blind curve, I might put on both blinkers, you know,

(03:30):
my four ways, just so people know that I'm there.
How do they drive an eerie We don't. Nobody parallel
parks and area. That's why if we found someone who
drives worse than I do, I think I think so Danielle.
I think she didn't. In Diamond's defense, she didn't crash
into anything but and that that you know of. Also,

(03:52):
he's not saying that where we were was close to
the corner. If I would have put on my left
hand blinker, he could have thought that I was just turning.
Not if your backup lights were on? Yeah, backup lights
are you on here? Not yours? Justice? And the street
that we're talking about is a one way going the

(04:13):
opposite way. So if you're putting your left hand blinker
on and I think you're going making a left up
a one way like you got serious? Okay? Who thinks
how can a street go one way the wrong way? No?
I think what he's saying is she had her left
blinker on the street was a one way going right,
so she couldn't been going. Okay, let's put this to bed.
Who thinks diamonds in the wrong? Say I? Who thinks

(04:34):
she's correct? Say nay? Not even Okay, wait before I
hang on, before we do that scary will you do
your COVID test? I guess, get up there in the fire.

(04:56):
Oh stop, he's starting his nose hairs. Get up up
until I don't want to start the one point movie.
Let's go higher deep nose, I think the higher man.
Oh god, you have a lot of nose hair made.

(05:18):
That's like not that's like when you get those tests
from got in there. This is insanity. You're all a
bunch of hypochondriacs. Why why don't we? I just wonder why. Okay,
I took a test before we got to the airport
for I heart. I get on the ground, I'm forced
picking another COVID test, and I took another one and
negative negative. I took a third one. Then I were

(05:38):
k mask because we had to go backstage, and then
I'm fully vexed. So all of this stuff put together everything,
and now we come home and why are we taking
this test? Because somebody in the building said they did
not feel good and they had a fever. Who was
at the festival where all of us were, So instead
of just trying to like, hey, look out for other people,
you're like, fuck you all, you hypochontrac Didn't you rather

(06:00):
be scary scary? Wouldn't you rather be safe than sorry? No,
you'd rather be upset. It doesn't that good, scary. Go
visit your parents to have symptoms. You my, it's good

(06:20):
that you're vac but that doesn't mean I'm gonna take
another test tomorrow to get on the ship. It doesn't
mean you're not going to give it to somebody else
who might not be vaxin. Why are you even trying?
I mean where you're preaching to the choir over here.
They need to invent something. You just connect to your
phone and do a quick swab of your phone of
your nose. You're good because literally every five minute, froggy soggy, froggy.

(06:49):
Android had that two years ago. Oh my god. Also,
you mean Android created COVID because it wasn't around then.
Actually actually COVID years ago, and have that to be
a test. Alright, let's let's move on. Changing gears, changing gears. Oh,

(07:10):
I was gonna throw a Diamond under the bus again
because when we were on our office I saw that
little snake guy out there. When we were on our
off the grid trip, you know, we had this enormous RV,
like humongous. It was very stressful to drive that thing around.
Diamond had to get Starbucks. Everybody, every single one of

(07:33):
us had a different point where I think we just snapped,
and Andrew snapped. We got into that parking lot and
we couldn't get out. And not only could we knock
it out, there was a police officer who refused to
help us and was basically like, go funk yourselves. I
don't know why you turned in here. All of the
patrons were beeping at us, yelling at us, you're blocking
our ship. People were like throwing their coffee cups at us.

(07:54):
It was quite dramatic. Andrew was like, I quit, I'm done.
I'm not doing this anymore. I felt so bad for him.
It was rough. Yeah, I don't really like confrontation. I'm
not the biggest fan of confrontation, but you want to
be on survivor give it back. But when it's over
a parking spot that someone had to have their Venti
coconut machiatto after leaving a beautiful national park, I get

(08:20):
a little piste and I'm not diamonds of a coconut.
The difference, I will say, there is something like that
animalistic thing and frog. If you had it like that
instant road rage. I remember when I was taking my
pills after I had the first stroke. One of these

(08:40):
side effects was uncontrollable rage, and somebody would like pull
out in front of me. I'm like, you cock suck.
I mean just screening with the first brain swormer that
I had back in two thou ten I used to
get what they call acro rage, and I would be
just fine, and then the smallest little thing could send
me over the edge and I would absolutely positively lose

(09:01):
my ship, asked Danielle, she's seen it happen. I was.
I was diagnosed with a similar thing, froggy, now that
you mentioned it. I was diagnosed with being born from
in Brooklyn. And so when you are everyone's a son
of a bitch, motherfucker, get off the road, regardless of
what they're doing. You yell all the time. But if
it seemed diamond, I would have screamed that a cursed

(09:25):
I mean, Andrew's the nicest person, He's never trying to
get into the ship, and you had all of these people.
I mean, it was like a team effort against us
screaming at us. I'm sorry, question, I have a question
about road rage. So there have been plenty of times
where someone will be next to you know, behind me
or whatever, and I'm like, goddamn you, motherfucker. But then
when they stop next to you next to the light
of like no, dude, I will mad dog the ship

(09:51):
out of him. I will pull up right next to
their hands like this, like what the funk are you doing?
Like people who are the actual band drivers? Though? Are
people that have triple A stickers on their window on
the window, not if you remember and you don't display it,
but if you have it on your window or you
have the triple wide rear view mirror. If I see

(10:12):
that in your car, I'm like, dude, this person, I
stayed away from them. I had a girl. I was
driving on a two lane road. There was a girl
next to me. I was kind of in her blind spot,
but she was on her phone. She started drifting into
my lane. I had to go off the road into
the grass so she didn't hit me, so she didn't
sides white me. I pulled him next to her. I
look at it, like what the funk was that? She
holds her phone up like I was on my phone.

(10:35):
I'm like you, I'm like, you gotta be kidding me.
I told you guys, if I was president, things would
be different because everybody would be armed with one egg
a day that you were allowed to throw at someone
for any reason. I think it would happen in traffic
a lot. Get one. You can't some people would just
unload it. Dickhead. At ten o'clock and then what do

(10:55):
you do if you encounter another one at three pm,
a bigger You have to be smart about it. You
have to go buy more eggs Tuesday and used to
on Wednesday. Did I tell you guys on the on
this podcast the Hamburger story. I think I told it
on the air on it No Dick, so many many, many,

(11:21):
many many years ago. I used to work for Red
Robin Robin and uh the store I worked at, the
location I was at was out of Hamburgers. There was
a problem with the delivery, so I had to drive
to another location and pick up like ten cases of
Hamburger patties in cases that had like a wax paper burger,
wax paper burger, you know, stacks of them. And so

(11:43):
I was getting on the the FDR Drive but which
is by the Brooklyn Bridge and is a merge where
it goes from two lanes to one to a ramp
and then it goes onto a three lane highway. So
a guy came out of nowhere and cut me off,
almost hit me. And so when I got next to
him at at the bottom of the ram, I had
my window open and I threw ray hamburg and meeting
his car window. Oh my god. Then I bet that

(12:05):
guy's gonna think twice about being a dick again because
he doesn't know if Hamburger makeup come flying at him.
That's right, It's like the egg theory. So I gotta say,
I moved from Brooklyn, New York, to New Jersey, and
when I did, all my cars in New Jersey have
now never since had a New Jersey license played on it.
Here's the problem. I am a Brooklyn, New York savvy

(12:25):
driver when the New Jersey plate hold on. If I'm
going to New York and I'm in Brooklyn or I'm
in the New York area, they see my Jersey plate
and they they got from New Jersey. And so I
feel like I have to prove myself and I'm like
they treat me differently because of the Jersey place. But meanwhile,
I'm sitting in my car driving saying to myself, but
I'm really from New York, but I have this Jersey plate.

(12:45):
No offense to Jersey, but I mean, you know what
I'm saying. No, you know, there's a nasal swab you
can take to test your Brooklyn part. I don't know.
He thank you everybody. I feel like That was the
Brooklyn Boys podcast. What's Your Copy? The Fifteen Minute Morning

(13:13):
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