Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
phone show? All right, we got a full house, lots
to talk about on the fifteen minute morning show podcast.
Let me start out by saying something. I didn't even
bring it up on the show today, but I wanted
to something as silly as this. But I know I'm
(00:24):
not alone. So the other day I went to the
grocery store and there was a company there, an Italian
food importing company, and I tried some of their stuff,
and the guy who rent runs it listens to a show,
and he gave me his card and he gave me
some stuff to take home to cook. It's an unbelievable
imported pastas and balsamic vinegar, stuff like this, So I
(00:46):
wanted to send him a thank you note. I can't
find the card to save my life, all right. I
know it's something simple. It's like, okay, people lose things.
It drove me insane all day long because there's no
way I could have lost that card. It was in
my pocket and then all of a sudden it was vanished.
I was calling people. I was, I mean, how insane.
Alex you were there. You had to you were driving
(01:06):
v n A and I nuts. You were running all
around the house trash added a bin. I went to
the trash five time. Everything. And then when when you
went back to kings, you asked the manager and they said,
we don't know. We had so many people here so
they can't give me an answer. So they didn't give
us an answer. And so have you ever misplaced a
pen you're using and you can't find it? It just
(01:29):
vanishes as if as if it just flew off into
another galaxy. The worst is wanted something bigger. Like you
walk in a room and you put down something big,
and I walk out and I go, okay, I don't know.
I just walked in here and I put it here,
So where did it go? It wouldn't leave. It wouldn't
leave my mind for three days. I would horrible. I know.
(01:52):
It's just it's weird how we get our minds stuck
on having to find something. And if we don't find
it and don't have an explanation how it disappeared, then
something is wrong with the universe. I convinced myself that
there's a ghost. I'm like, this was the freaking ghost again.
Damn it, This thing takes everything I want. There is
no ghost I think there is an explanation for the
missing whatever. Do you know there's no ghost? And well
there is, it goes but there ghost didn't take my card.
(02:13):
Maybe you missed your pocket and it just went straight
on the ground. That's good. I had a green hot
wheel car as a kid and had blue stripes on
the roof, and I remember playing with I used to
collect hot wheel cars and I remember this green car
was called the Caribou. Uh it fell behind the dresser.
Now I had three dressers in a row like hutches.
She couldn't move them. I knew if it was back there,
I was never gonna see it. And then I just
(02:35):
I was like, oh, the cars back there. We look
at a flashlight. Never never got the car, and my
parents brought me another one. Well, my mom, after like
living in her apartment for fifty years, she moved out.
So we emptied the room out and I'm like, when
we moved the furniture, I'm getting my car back. After
all these years, that car wasn't back there. I don't
know what happened to it. It disintegrated in thirty years
and thirty you knew it was there for thirty and
(02:57):
I remembered it. But what makes it worse for you?
Bro it is you you thought of it as being
safe and sounds. I'm an only child, nobody else. I'm
on a currently, I'm on a two year search for
a twenty five dollar Target gift card which was given
to me, and I remember last going out with a
jacket on and putting it in my front jacket zipper
pocket because I knew I was going to go there
(03:18):
that day. Never did make it to Target, and then
years ago, this was two over two years ago. Now
I went back to the jacket a couple of days later,
it was not there. Then I'm like, wait, maybe I
put it in my pants pocket? Is it in a wallet?
Did he get mixed up with business cards? Gone? Two
years later, every day I'm like, today's the day I'm
going to find that. Still have not found it, but
(03:41):
I'm hopeful. My husband doesn't know this, but I thought
I got he Maybe you won't listen today I got
him a hundred dollar gift cards Starbucks for Christmas and
I put it in the zipper part of my bag
and I change bags so often, but it stayed in
that bag and I never found it. So for Christmas,
I brought him and another hundred dollar Starbucks gift cards.
(04:02):
So that hundred dollar one is someplace in the house.
It has to be. You don't never find it, but
I'll never find it. There are there's just no explanation
for where they disappear too. But all the big problem
is it drives you insane. What's upround? I think you
know there's like a saint that you have to ask
for if you if you love something, ay, and you've
got to bury a spoon in the yard down statue
(04:25):
of St. Anthony. It really works. I've lost a couple
of things and then I'll say St. Anthony, please find
help me find this thing, and then like maybe like
an hour or two later, all of a sudden, I
find it and there it is. I had to St
Anthony statue something where I put it? How do you
find a lost St. Anthony? I think you just guess
St Anthony? All right, can we get to what we
were about to get to on the show today? You
(04:47):
decided you gotta stop me. So around the table right
now is Gandhi and they're scary, and there's Brody, our
friend Vienna who's here until Friday. Then back to Tanzania.
And there's Alex is here, my fiance. Now I introduce
him as Alex my fiance or my fiance Alex want
to introduce him? I thought you're supposed to put the
name first and then their title a second. Uh. Okay,
(05:12):
Garrett is here, and there's Danielle and great tea and
Nate being very quiet. All right. So when you if
you're in a relationship, you sleep in the bed every night.
You always sleep on the same side. And I found
out just this weekend why Alex always sleeps far away
from the door and I sleep closer to the door.
Do you want to tell everyone? Why should? There has
(05:32):
two reasons for this. Actually, you know, I sleep further
away from the door, so if an intruder comes in,
they go for you first, and it gives me time
to react and save you and save myself. You. Yeah,
And then the second reason is because you're always closer
to the bathroom. And we know when people get older,
(05:54):
they can control the ladder. So if you need to
the bathroom closer to the door. Did you see Elvis's
eyes pop open? He didn't know that was coming. That's considerate,
you know, So you don't have to walk around the
bed to go to the bathroom. You just flip out
of bed and right into the Bathrootball. I never get
(06:15):
out of bed to go to the bathroom ever, he's saying.
He's saying it's going to be soon though. Yeah, which
couch do you want to sleep on? Merry Christmas, Elvis,
here's your bed pen? Yeah? People you so you do
you think that you're going to be able to get
the intruder out or fight the intruder off more than
(06:37):
Elvis would? Yes, I believe there is no intruder. And
it's not the fact that you would rather him die
than you. Oh maybe if Elvis is in the bathroom peeing,
you're a dead man. Keep that in mind. But that's
like every time we go to a restaurant, my back
needs to be touched the wall, and I always need
to be looking who's walking into the rush. He always
(07:00):
needs to know I need to coming in and who's
coming in. And Alex is always And this is one
thing I knew about Alex when I first met him.
He is always investigating with everything you say, with every
move you make, and the people around him he knows
I'm being very serious. He's always aware of his surroundings,
(07:20):
and I guess that's you're growing up with a father
on the p Yeah, my dad, you know that rubbed
off on me. There you go anyway, So uh, there
you have it. So Scotty B was saying that when
he and his wife sleep in their bed at home,
they always sleep on the same side, but when they
go to hotel rooms they switched side. But they don't
know why. It's just something they do. See. Last time
we were in a hotel, I said to my husband,
(07:42):
that's my side of the bed. I always leep on
that side of the bed. He goes, well, not this time.
And I find it harder to fall asleep if it's
not on the same fi side of the bed that
I'm used to. I don't know why. I think it's
just in my head. It is in your of course
it is. I seek out the power outlet and or
the electronics because to be close to where my phone
is charging, and or some kind of radio situation or
(08:04):
you know, yeah, TV, you wanna be in control. I
need to see. I didn't realize I was being used
as a bullet shield until I had my surgery, when
you had your surgery, when I had my surgery because
after I had I always slept on the one side
of the bed and I would sleep on my right side,
spooning her right. And so when I had my surgery,
(08:27):
the doctor said, you really need to sleep on your
left side because your heart's on that side and it's
easier for your you know, blood to pump through whatever.
So I go, honey, we have to switch sides of
the bed. She goes, well, no, because then that means
I'm closer to the door, and I want you closer
to the door in case somebody breaks in. Okay, can
we talk about this. We we really truly feeling there's
(08:47):
there's a good chance that someone's about to break into
our house and the make barely walk fend. Seriously, I agree.
I always thought that was the rule of thumb, that like,
you know, the somebody would sleep next to the door,
so I, I, the man would slip, would sleep by
the door so that if somebody came in, I would
protect my family. And so this is a thing, that's
(09:08):
what I thought. I was just kidding. You've heard this before.
My ex boyfriend used to do all of the things
you guys are talking about. He had to sit with
his back to the wall at a restaurant, walk on
the outside of the street, sleep closest to the door,
all these like guy things. So since Alex is stronger,
he should sit and sleep next to the door. No,
I'm going to give that one up. I guess I'm
a pussy. I sleep away from we get out of here.
(09:31):
He's just I'm away from the door. I sleep. We didn't.
That's the word we don't use, looking curse. Let's to
see where we can found the words disgusting too. I
think he used the p word. It's I'm if I
(09:52):
call you a dick, it doesn't mean you're a penis
you're like an asshole. Hold on, can you say an
asshole dick is acceptable? Like that was not acceptable? Hey man,
if you if you don't, if you don't want, I'm sorry,
that's different. So it's a pussy cat. That's not what
he meant. I never thought that would ever come out
of your mouth. It just came out because it was
(10:15):
just colloquial, and that's that's what That's what I meant.
You're talking about a pussy willow whatever. All right, I'll
tell you what, if Daniel, it makes you easy, then
we can't. I'm sorry, I got the worst mouth in
the room. Hold on, hold on, hold on, yes, yes,
So you know in Africa most of the couches the
man has to sleep next to the door. What has
(10:39):
been happening to me since I got You know, I
have this big bed to sleep on. It's a hotel.
It's a hotel, and all the time I'm sleeping at
the edge part of it, close to the door because
there's who I'm used to sleep, and they leave the
other side open. Tonight, you know, tonight you should switch
(10:59):
it up. Try to sleep on the other side and
see if you can do it. Maybe they move the
bed on the other side. But also, I've been sleeping
most of the time facing west, so most of the
hotels that I go, the beds are facing the other side,
and that takes me time to get into my sleep.
Now tell everyone why you tell everyone why you're accustomed
(11:19):
to sleeping facing the west. I have no idea the
sunrise email with that. Not not not, It's not about
the sunrise, you know, it's probably I've been sleeping that
way since I was young, and my body is accustomed
to that. So every time I change a sleeping position,
(11:41):
or sides. I don't sleep for hours. Even if it's
a direction, your body knows which direction is west? Yeah,
anybody else? Does anybody else sleep with the direction and
have any idea? I don't know. Unless you sleep a
certain way because when the sun comes up, it's in
your eyes, so you're you're supposed to if you do
feins way, you're supposed to know what way you're supposed
to sleep, and you're supposed to face. I want to say.
(12:05):
The saying was, as long as your feet are not
facing the door, you're safe because you're supposed to face
because then all the energy runs out of your body
out of the door. Well, you're supposed to bury a
flute under the driveway. It's just one of those things.
I don't know. Can you do a science experiment and
(12:26):
switch positions? Sure? Absolutely no. If he comes in cranky tomorrow,
we'll find out. I don't think I'm up for that.
But I keep in mind that he's only in this
bed three or four nights a week. Therefore my side
of the bed is has a little rivet in it. Yes,
his is still my firm, firm contort to your body.
(12:47):
When you guys get married, are you going to stay
together all the time. I still do this thing. I
think things working out. Just find the way is this
is a whole other show. Maybe I'll had another day
another day. What if I want to be with the
China we registered for by the people still register for China.
(13:08):
When he just said that, I was like, I would
have been to a wedding that had China on the
You have defense if you registered for China before a
trip there, there is what the hell do you? No
one brings out the good China. And we're talking about gifts.
We don't. We don't want any gifts at all. We
have everything. We have stuff we don't even need. Are
you going to set up like a donation to a
certain place? So that's good? Absolutely, go back to this
(13:30):
p word that Scary used. No, you know, I think Danielle,
since you are you're a senior partner on the show. Yeah,
I'm a potty mouth. I think you can outrank Scary
and you can tell him he's no longer allowed to show.
Just as long as you didn't matter. She's a senior partner, Scary,
you are no longer alive. The word I would never
(13:52):
use the word. I never thought are you using that context,
were you'd be offended by anything? That I know? I'm
not a senior ranking partner, Yes you are. You joined
as a senior a senior partner. So what if I
love the P word that Danielle is a super senior
(14:13):
partner because she's been a longer than Gandhi, who's only
a senior part I don't know how this works. It's
like everyone in our company's a senior vice press straight,
I mean straight, Greg, thank you you're a junior partner.
I have to say I was a little comfortable too.
I was taken aback a little bit by the P word.
I just felt like there's certain words that we don't
necessarily have to use anymore, and I just didn't. I
(14:34):
haven't used the P word to myself. I haven't. Yeah,
but here's the thing we all throw around, you know,
f ship. That word doesn't usually the guy who peas
on his own house offended. I don't think. Hold on,
Hold on, when the last time you pete on your
own house last weekend? What a dick? This is the
(14:57):
Stranger Show, The fifteen Minute Morning Show.