December 23, 2025 • 21 mins
In this holiday Teeny Meanie, Lisa, Nick, and Celia give listeners permission to stop forcing joy, togetherness, and overcommitment just because it’s December. From skipping plans to ignoring guilt and doing only what actually feels good, the crew reminds you that rest counts, boundaries matter, and forced merriment helps no one. A messy, honest send-off before the show takes a well-earned holiday break.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Lisa Lampanelli is not a licensed therapist or life coach.
She is a meddling advice giving yana and know it all,
and her words come from her head, her heart, and
often out of her ass. This podcast should not be
misconstrued as therapy. It should be taking with a huge
grain of salt for entertainment purposes only.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
These You need help, you're the problems.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Come on, come down.
Speaker 4 (00:29):
Go leamb.
Speaker 5 (00:32):
Take a pill. I think you're insane.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Do what I say, dumb ass, listen to me.
Speaker 4 (00:45):
You this is strength is but I don't think so.
Speaker 5 (00:48):
You know what I think it should be called?
Speaker 4 (00:50):
Nick.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
You can ask me what it should be called.
Speaker 5 (00:52):
Even uglier on Zoo if you didn't think you had
to suck your own bit before, we're gonna be sucking.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Our own Dixon out because no one's gonna want us
after this ugly taping of shrink this.
Speaker 3 (01:07):
That's right. My light's pretty good. I feel like your mine.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
I am fortunately live in a house with a lot
of sunlight, and like it's like it's like, why bother,
It's ridiculous.
Speaker 5 (01:21):
I don't care, though, you know why. I'm no attachments
to my looks.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
Like whatever, what are you gonna do, I'll suck my
dick all by my say, welcome to shrink this podcast.
That's saying a you farewell goodbye for two weeks because
we deserve a damn break too for the holiday happy
(01:50):
holic hunts. Yeah, I'm celebrating them all, especially Hanukkah this
year because all my friends except nicker Jews, and they
deserve a little special love this time of year. You
know who doesn't deserve any love? You can find her
(02:13):
at at Celia Underscore Underscore Romano.
Speaker 5 (02:19):
Celia Romano, say Celia.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Celia promise speak when spoken to, but clearly she doesn't
mind cutting off. She the speak when spoken to might
apply to maybe after I finish my sentence, you dumb horror.
Speaker 4 (02:33):
Happy holidays.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
How is the Lord Concert, you dumb bitch.
Speaker 5 (02:38):
Yeah, we see that.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Celia looks a little tired, although she looks cute to me,
but Nick's super critical of only when I know you're
welcome you.
Speaker 5 (02:46):
We didn't have to dru up me for that. Thanks.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
It's almost like I'll point to you if I want
to hear something. Okay, let's try it. So how is
the Lord concert?
Speaker 5 (02:54):
Point? It was really fun on point means that's it.
That's it, that's what you get.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
You get up, you don't talk at all, you don't
talk at all. You have fucking weirdo. All right, so listen. Sorry,
this is unhinged, and I'll tell you why. Because the
holidays are coming. It's a very stressful time for people.
People feel like they have to force togetherness and force
merriment and force cheer. And I'm here to tell you
(03:22):
you do not. You get to be exactly what you
want to be at this time of year, whether it's
the gal or guy who stays home.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
It's just it's cozy season.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
I'm gonna get my hot chocolate and oh my god,
sometimes I frighten.
Speaker 5 (03:36):
I just forget to eat because I'm so cozy.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Or you could be the party gal Mike Celia running
around to the Lord, going around to the different variable
New Orleans haunts where she gets down plowed and that's
the holiday chair right in the old anis. And you know,
(04:00):
don't force the holidays.
Speaker 5 (04:02):
Be who you are. I'd like to think of the
holidays as Nick's penis in some man's buttole. You can't
force it. You just gotta let it flow, am I Right?
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Nick been there had virtual fist bump, get to do
it too, so she picks that one minute. Look at this,
she can't even fist correctly, speaking of fisting correctly.
Speaker 5 (04:27):
Where could our listeners find you?
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Nick Yo? You know what it is, baby, Nick Scops
from home.
Speaker 6 (04:34):
You could follow me at Nick Scops on Instagram, at TikTok.
You can catch me on blackout Wednesdays with Celia and Louisiana.
Speaker 3 (04:42):
Yeah, fucking at Jazz.
Speaker 6 (04:44):
Bo Pete's Crawl, Daddy Disco Tick wherever the fuck you, Dick.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
I don't know how I'm old out of that.
Speaker 5 (04:51):
I don't think you can find me anywhere, and I
don't care.
Speaker 4 (04:54):
All right there, I said it.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
I'm gonna be taking a two week hiatus, and that's
why we're taping from home, by the way, because we're
like half in, half out. I was like, we could
tape something just to say goodbye to our fans for
two weeks. But I'm not coming in there and giving
it my all. I'm just gonna give it what I can,
which is how we think of the holidays. Nick, How
(05:17):
are you approaching this holiday and how do you think
people who listened to us should approach them.
Speaker 6 (05:23):
I think all of you listeners out there should get
a fucking life, okay and leave us alone. No, I'm
just kidding, just like Celia. No, it's not as fun
making fun as Celia virtually as it is in person.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
But let's just leave her out of it.
Speaker 6 (05:40):
Why don't. Yeah, let's blur her. Although that reaction was good,
No for the holidays. I mean, I'm actually in like
good spirits. This year someone invites me over for a
secret Santa White Elephant bullshit or whatever, and I always
say yes because I'm like, oh, I have time.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
I didn't admit to anything this year.
Speaker 6 (06:02):
Yeah, and we're gonna and we're gonna decide in the moment.
At Christmas Day, I'll see my dad, we go get
Chinese food.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
That's it. But then I go home. He was like,
you want to see a movie? After I was like no.
So it's I think I think not over committing. Now.
Speaker 6 (06:16):
I know people, I'm in a unique situation where everyone
in my family's dead or I don't.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Want to talk to them, so it just is what
it is.
Speaker 6 (06:26):
So I have this luxury, but it's been I'm so
much happier going into the holidays knowing I don't have to, oh,
go to this person's house and do this, and there's
this party in that. I just right, I'm gonna decide
what i want to do in the moment. If I'm
feeling up for it, I'm gonna do it. If not,
I'm gonna chill. So I wouldest our listeners do the same
thing if you have the luxury.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
This is what makes me happy. I see an evolution
in you. I know you many years, probably four or
five years right.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
Now, is it about that long?
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Five?
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (06:53):
Five, You've really evolved a lot. And I joke on
you a lot.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
I goof on you and say how you're just a dumb,
dirty Italian wop off the boat douchebag who doesn't watch
anything but the Sopranos and has nothing real going for him.
Speaker 5 (07:07):
But other than those things which are true, you have
grown a lot. And I think, believe it or not,
we're never too old to grow.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
As they say in the story of Buddy the Elf
and the Broadway musical, they say in never to like
to grow, it's like to grow. That's the story of
Buddy the Elf.
Speaker 5 (07:29):
Bits. I'm the reason I sing this to you.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Now, yeah, is because it just occurred to me, and
I just sang it.
Speaker 5 (07:38):
And that is what the Holidays should be about. If
it comes up.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
From within you and it occurs to you, Hey, let
me go visit so and so, let me go see
this show. Let me go take this child to I
don't know, an auction.
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Of some sort.
Speaker 4 (07:55):
Let me take it.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Let me take a child to see it. Christmas tree lighting.
It has to occur to you, and it has to
come from within. The forces of outside make us feel
like we have to commit to too much. Then we
resent everything and enjoy nothing. So Nicholas, as they call you,
I would say, you have grown to not feel like
(08:20):
you have to force it like a dick into one's ass.
Speaker 3 (08:23):
That's right. We've all been there and it hurts it.
Speaker 5 (08:26):
Does you know it does smell like you're gay?
Speaker 4 (08:30):
I think that's also you.
Speaker 5 (08:33):
Are you joking?
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Maybe you're telling the truth that you're lucky enuf to
your family's dead, But what would one I'm gonna ask
Celia this because we haven't let her talk, and I'm
going to point to her for a limited time and
hear's some wisdom from someone whose family isn't one hundred
percent together, isn't none of us have a family that's
(08:56):
really all together, but a family that's a little old,
you know, divided, et cetera, could be Uh, we all
are annoyed by certain people in our family. So yeah,
how do you suggest people juggle this family situation for
optimmental health?
Speaker 5 (09:13):
Because that is what is important and go.
Speaker 7 (09:16):
You have to really prioritize yourself and what you want
to spend time on, or time who you want to
spend time with, rather than feeling guilted by people.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
I had this fantasy of like, I want to take
this has been a fantasy I've had for years. I
just want to take like a week and just be
by myself and see what that's like and see what
feelings come up. And I never really had the guts
to do it. But this year I said, I've been
working on my you know, the spiritual stuff, the emotional
stuff for like over a year, and I'm like, let's
(09:49):
see if I write in my calendar December twenty sixth
through January second, take the whole time at home. Let
me see how it feels. What's the worst that could happen,
What feelings could possibly come up that I won't be
able to handle.
Speaker 5 (10:04):
Let's see.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
But that having a fantasy and never fulfilling it. It's
just like I'll be eighty years old someday and wondering
why did I never have.
Speaker 5 (10:12):
The guts to just settle in at home and see
what that's like.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
This doesn't mean I'm like have to tie myself in
the house and lock myself in and not go to.
Speaker 5 (10:19):
Dinner or whatever if it should to rise.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
But like if you ever thought to yourself, I want
to take the time to just be who I am
and see what occurs to me to do from day
to day.
Speaker 5 (10:30):
Do it now.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
And when you said something about guilt, I often say
when you said, oh, don't be guilted by people wanting
you to spend.
Speaker 5 (10:40):
Time with them.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Guilt is for people who've done something wrong. If it's
wrong to take care of yourself mentally, if it's wrong
to not see problematic family members, if it's wrong to
not run ragged and then come back to work even
worse than you were before, nothing wrong with any of that.
So the guilt has to be something you internally work
(11:04):
on and get rid of. Because we have nothing to
feel guilty about. I mean, I like that you got
you to your father you do that Jewish tradition of
Chinese food on Christmas and don't care that you're not
even Jews.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Right, you go for it.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
You don't even do the movie after at least the
Jews are generous enough to do that.
Speaker 5 (11:21):
You're you're a real Jew.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
That's right. I get five five dinner and I go,
you're paying this time? That's it? And then I go,
I go bye, love you. That's it.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Well, how do you feel about Christmas music? Because I
was a little upset with I. Okay, So I think
I've said on the podcast before, I don't listen to
a lot of music. I'm just starting to again because
every song with words seems to have some memory for me,
and I'm like, uh, I don't want to get.
Speaker 5 (11:53):
Emotional all the time. So I usually listen to this channel.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
I'm serious, that is all forties music because it doesn't
have any emotion attached to it because I wasn't born yet,
so how would I know. So what happens is the
day after Thanksgiving, my fricking forties channel, I turn it
on to get a little you know, Uh, you're the top,
you are the Colossie. I'm you know, I'm looking Forard.
Speaker 5 (12:19):
To call porter and instead I hear of yourself a
rapy little Chris what the day after Thanksgiving? I don't
like it.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
I felt it was forced upon me, so I had
nothing to listen to. I what is it we're taping
this December eighteenth. I am finally. Yesterday was the first
day I listened to one Christmas song. It was in
my mind, let it snow bing Crosby. Sure he was
abusive to his children, but that's never been considered a
(12:52):
bad thing, right, And I was like, let me listen
to that, and I finally eased into it. So what
I'm saying is this Christmas music.
Speaker 5 (13:01):
All this is forced, forced, forced.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
If you feel it at all, like it's forced in,
don't do it?
Speaker 5 (13:07):
Are you a Christmas music guy? Have you started that
yet this year?
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I never was.
Speaker 6 (13:13):
There were a handful of certain songs like I'll tell
you Merry Christmas, buy and sync Woo.
Speaker 5 (13:19):
Do you like the modern stuff?
Speaker 6 (13:20):
I get that, yeah, Mammy Chrismuth and heavy Eh, it's
the fucking shit, dude.
Speaker 5 (13:28):
I know it is.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Honestly, if that that, if anyone has any bad feeling
to their death song, like you're an idiot.
Speaker 6 (13:34):
Y's that I like Last Christmas Bye by Wham I Do.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
Yeah, that gets to me a little because it has
see that has eighties memories for me of heartbreak and
when I still believed in love and that there was
hope in the world and there's not.
Speaker 5 (13:47):
So it's like, yeah, so you know, I understand that.
Speaker 6 (13:50):
I do also love that music video because it's just
George Michael pretending to be interested.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
In a woman and like pretending not to be gay.
It's the funniest video, so you can relate to it exactly.
Speaker 6 (14:00):
Yes, she smells like you're gay shrinkshop dot com.
Speaker 5 (14:05):
Ah No, but it is. It's weird. How if it
all feels.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
Like it's not right, you don't have to do it,
you know, like this whole thing of like I have
a friend, poor thing.
Speaker 5 (14:16):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
She told me that every year her entire family, like
seven relatives stay at her house for five days live. Yes, now,
I have never before heard such a good argument for
living in a small house.
Speaker 5 (14:41):
It is.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
And again she loves them, she has no problem with them.
But the zero alone time and the zero chance to
have a down time and to factor in what you
need that just would not work for her the house
is not a hotel, and how poor are people that
they can't just stay in a hotel?
Speaker 5 (14:58):
That's my feeling. Don't be so poor? Stop being poor.
I think that's the lesson of the holidays, don't you.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
I stop being.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Poor, and don't be friends with Nick because I'll tell
you why.
Speaker 5 (15:11):
There's a song. Have you heard this Christmas song? Where
they go? It's an old one. I think it might
be bing Crosby. Also, it's the holiday season?
Speaker 3 (15:23):
A hoop?
Speaker 7 (15:24):
Do you?
Speaker 2 (15:25):
I dick grey duck? And don't forget to hang up
your sock? So every time I hear it, what do
you think?
Speaker 5 (15:30):
I think? And don't forget to suck a.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
Big dock cock.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
It's like all I hear is don't forget to suck
on your cock, get at it and you ruined Christmas?
Speaker 5 (15:42):
But in a good way?
Speaker 7 (15:43):
Is that?
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Dude?
Speaker 3 (15:44):
That's how I feel? The in sing song, I add
lib so many things.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
I love it, Merry Christmas because I'm fucking gay?
Speaker 5 (15:54):
What's wrong with us? Celia?
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Do you have feelings towards this, this this forced merriment
of Christmas and songs?
Speaker 7 (16:04):
I love Christmas music.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
No, no, it's great, But do you think it's ever
forced upon you, like a prison rate.
Speaker 7 (16:12):
I think that all I want for Christmas is you
is forced upon us. Yeah, like insanely.
Speaker 5 (16:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (16:20):
I love like Wonderful Christmas Time I Paul McCartney, I
like it too. Yeah, I love that song. I also
like Last Christmas and I really like the old stuff
like being Crosby. I like Frank Sinatra's jingle Bells.
Speaker 5 (16:37):
Yes, this is my favorite.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
There's two songs that came out Christmas songs that came
out in the eighties that I love but like I
cannot listen to. And one is the one that band
aid one where.
Speaker 7 (16:51):
It's like do you know it's Christmas?
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Because I was working at Rolling Stone at the time
in the eighties and when that came out, and like,
it just is too I'm not saying it's a bad memory,
but it's too nostalgic for me because I lived through
that recording and I was like, whenever I hear it,
I'm like, ah, I should be listening for the African people,
(17:17):
but it almost makes me just too much wish for
that time of my life. So I'm like, well, not
not yet this year. And I think sometimes that's the
whole feeling that we should have maybe not yet it's
not like, oh, I'll never listen to it again. Hearing
Bob Geldorf for Spandau Ballet singing that DoD and Africa's
(17:42):
Christmas do Wow the greatest.
Speaker 4 (17:48):
This is love.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
But I mean that maybe okay next year. What I
did was never okay by the way that singing. But
that might be all right next year, but it's not
okay this year, and that's all right. And there was
another Eighties Christmas song.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
I don't know.
Speaker 5 (18:05):
They're all so like just they were a little oh,
I know the Pogues, that one where he goes.
Speaker 4 (18:12):
Yeah dadday ya La da da.
Speaker 5 (18:14):
The streets of New York City. You know that one.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
It's about this drunk and his girlfriend fighting on Christmas
by that Irish donkey band, the Pogues, who were just
a bunch of Irish drunks, and it it's so like,
oh my god, I remember fighting on the street with
an Irish drunk at the time.
Speaker 5 (18:35):
Do I have to relive this every year?
Speaker 3 (18:38):
You know?
Speaker 2 (18:39):
So what I'm saying, folks in a roundabout, but yet
literal way is just just do what you can handle.
If you put a toe in if you listen to
three notes of it and you're already sobbing, or you're
plunged into depression and nostalgia that you can't handle, just.
Speaker 5 (18:57):
Stop it and listen to the forties junction. You know
what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Listen to a disco inferno, Listen to Shrink This old
episodes and go that doesn't make me cry, It doesn't
even make me laugh or feel anything.
Speaker 5 (19:08):
And that's what we're here for.
Speaker 6 (19:10):
For you, aren't we, Nick, We're here to make you
wet that.
Speaker 5 (19:17):
No sense, So listen, listen.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
We're gonna take two weeks off because even we deserve
some time to ourselves, to feel things, to eat Chinese food,
to not do much, to not drive Celia crazy over
her little break that she contractually has. And we will
be premiering season two of Shrink This back by unpopular demand?
Speaker 5 (19:46):
Who asked for it? No One? On January?
Speaker 4 (19:50):
What is it? Celia?
Speaker 5 (19:51):
January? What you typed It?
Speaker 2 (19:56):
Tuesday, January thirteenth. It's going to be the episode no
one asks for and nobody wants. We're coming back with
the did we Fix Celia episode? We will revisit Celia's
troubles and woes.
Speaker 5 (20:11):
That we examined in season.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
One, and we will end a crippling silence about did
our intervention work?
Speaker 4 (20:21):
Tune it in.
Speaker 5 (20:28):
Third date and comment below. I actually don't comment below
because there's nothing to comment about.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
We don't care.
Speaker 2 (20:36):
I turn off comments. I don't want to hear oh, oh,
what do you think you're funny?
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (20:41):
You look old?
Speaker 7 (20:42):
You know?
Speaker 5 (20:43):
And those are all directed a Nick.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Oh sad so parting words Celia to our delightful audience for.
Speaker 7 (20:51):
Two weeks, Listen to shrink This on your iHeartRadio app
or wherever you get your podcasts. Email us at shrink
This Show gmail dot com and have a good holiday.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Great she like, did gave you a little gift Nick
by making you not say it?
Speaker 3 (21:09):
That's right? So I'm just gonna sing it. You're gonna
wand up a feeling and the second dick and lick
your balls.
Speaker 4 (21:16):
On the ceiling.
Speaker 5 (21:19):
Yeah, see that's what you do.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
I'm just gonna go, uh beat up an irishman in
the street in New York.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
As you should.
Speaker 5 (21:28):
I think that'll be nice. We'll see you on January thirteenth, whether.
Speaker 4 (21:32):
You like it or not.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
See at Queer's Homers
Lisa Lampanelli is not a licensed therapist or life coach.
She is a meddling advice giving yana and know it all,
and her words come from her head, her heart, and
often out of her ass. This podcast should not be
misconstrued as therapy. It should be taking with a huge
grain of salt for entertainment purposes only.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
These You need help, you're the problems.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Come on, come down.
Speaker 4 (00:29):
Go leamb.
Speaker 5 (00:32):
Take a pill. I think you're insane.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Do what I say, dumb ass, listen to me.
Speaker 4 (00:45):
You this is strength is but I don't think so.
Speaker 5 (00:48):
You know what I think it should be called?
Speaker 4 (00:50):
Nick.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
You can ask me what it should be called.
Speaker 5 (00:52):
Even uglier on Zoo if you didn't think you had
to suck your own bit before, we're gonna be sucking.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
Our own Dixon out because no one's gonna want us
after this ugly taping of shrink this.
Speaker 3 (01:07):
That's right. My light's pretty good. I feel like your mine.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
I am fortunately live in a house with a lot
of sunlight, and like it's like it's like, why bother,
It's ridiculous.
Speaker 5 (01:21):
I don't care, though, you know why. I'm no attachments
to my looks.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
Like whatever, what are you gonna do, I'll suck my
dick all by my say, welcome to shrink this podcast.
That's saying a you farewell goodbye for two weeks because
we deserve a damn break too for the holiday happy
(01:50):
holic hunts. Yeah, I'm celebrating them all, especially Hanukkah this
year because all my friends except nicker Jews, and they
deserve a little special love this time of year. You
know who doesn't deserve any love? You can find her
(02:13):
at at Celia Underscore Underscore Romano.
Speaker 5 (02:19):
Celia Romano, say Celia.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Celia promise speak when spoken to, but clearly she doesn't
mind cutting off. She the speak when spoken to might
apply to maybe after I finish my sentence, you dumb horror.
Speaker 4 (02:33):
Happy holidays.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
How is the Lord Concert, you dumb bitch.
Speaker 5 (02:38):
Yeah, we see that.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Celia looks a little tired, although she looks cute to me,
but Nick's super critical of only when I know you're
welcome you.
Speaker 5 (02:46):
We didn't have to dru up me for that. Thanks.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
It's almost like I'll point to you if I want
to hear something. Okay, let's try it. So how is
the Lord concert?
Speaker 5 (02:54):
Point? It was really fun on point means that's it.
That's it, that's what you get.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
You get up, you don't talk at all, you don't
talk at all. You have fucking weirdo. All right, so listen. Sorry,
this is unhinged, and I'll tell you why. Because the
holidays are coming. It's a very stressful time for people.
People feel like they have to force togetherness and force
merriment and force cheer. And I'm here to tell you
(03:22):
you do not. You get to be exactly what you
want to be at this time of year, whether it's
the gal or guy who stays home.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
It's just it's cozy season.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
I'm gonna get my hot chocolate and oh my god,
sometimes I frighten.
Speaker 5 (03:36):
I just forget to eat because I'm so cozy.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Or you could be the party gal Mike Celia running
around to the Lord, going around to the different variable
New Orleans haunts where she gets down plowed and that's
the holiday chair right in the old anis. And you know,
(04:00):
don't force the holidays.
Speaker 5 (04:02):
Be who you are. I'd like to think of the
holidays as Nick's penis in some man's buttole. You can't
force it. You just gotta let it flow, am I Right?
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Nick been there had virtual fist bump, get to do
it too, so she picks that one minute. Look at this,
she can't even fist correctly, speaking of fisting correctly.
Speaker 5 (04:27):
Where could our listeners find you?
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Nick Yo? You know what it is, baby, Nick Scops
from home.
Speaker 6 (04:34):
You could follow me at Nick Scops on Instagram, at TikTok.
You can catch me on blackout Wednesdays with Celia and Louisiana.
Speaker 3 (04:42):
Yeah, fucking at Jazz.
Speaker 6 (04:44):
Bo Pete's Crawl, Daddy Disco Tick wherever the fuck you, Dick.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
I don't know how I'm old out of that.
Speaker 5 (04:51):
I don't think you can find me anywhere, and I
don't care.
Speaker 4 (04:54):
All right there, I said it.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
I'm gonna be taking a two week hiatus, and that's
why we're taping from home, by the way, because we're
like half in, half out. I was like, we could
tape something just to say goodbye to our fans for
two weeks. But I'm not coming in there and giving
it my all. I'm just gonna give it what I can,
which is how we think of the holidays. Nick, How
(05:17):
are you approaching this holiday and how do you think
people who listened to us should approach them.
Speaker 6 (05:23):
I think all of you listeners out there should get
a fucking life, okay and leave us alone. No, I'm
just kidding, just like Celia. No, it's not as fun
making fun as Celia virtually as it is in person.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
But let's just leave her out of it.
Speaker 6 (05:40):
Why don't. Yeah, let's blur her. Although that reaction was good,
No for the holidays. I mean, I'm actually in like
good spirits. This year someone invites me over for a
secret Santa White Elephant bullshit or whatever, and I always
say yes because I'm like, oh, I have time.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
I didn't admit to anything this year.
Speaker 6 (06:02):
Yeah, and we're gonna and we're gonna decide in the moment.
At Christmas Day, I'll see my dad, we go get
Chinese food.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
That's it. But then I go home. He was like,
you want to see a movie? After I was like no.
So it's I think I think not over committing. Now.
Speaker 6 (06:16):
I know people, I'm in a unique situation where everyone
in my family's dead or I don't.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Want to talk to them, so it just is what
it is.
Speaker 6 (06:26):
So I have this luxury, but it's been I'm so
much happier going into the holidays knowing I don't have to, oh,
go to this person's house and do this, and there's
this party in that. I just right, I'm gonna decide
what i want to do in the moment. If I'm
feeling up for it, I'm gonna do it. If not,
I'm gonna chill. So I wouldest our listeners do the same
thing if you have the luxury.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
This is what makes me happy. I see an evolution
in you. I know you many years, probably four or
five years right.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
Now, is it about that long?
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Five?
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (06:53):
Five, You've really evolved a lot. And I joke on
you a lot.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
I goof on you and say how you're just a dumb,
dirty Italian wop off the boat douchebag who doesn't watch
anything but the Sopranos and has nothing real going for him.
Speaker 5 (07:07):
But other than those things which are true, you have
grown a lot. And I think, believe it or not,
we're never too old to grow.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
As they say in the story of Buddy the Elf
and the Broadway musical, they say in never to like
to grow, it's like to grow. That's the story of
Buddy the Elf.
Speaker 5 (07:29):
Bits. I'm the reason I sing this to you.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Now, yeah, is because it just occurred to me, and
I just sang it.
Speaker 5 (07:38):
And that is what the Holidays should be about. If
it comes up.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
From within you and it occurs to you, Hey, let
me go visit so and so, let me go see
this show. Let me go take this child to I
don't know, an auction.
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Of some sort.
Speaker 4 (07:55):
Let me take it.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Let me take a child to see it. Christmas tree lighting.
It has to occur to you, and it has to
come from within. The forces of outside make us feel
like we have to commit to too much. Then we
resent everything and enjoy nothing. So Nicholas, as they call you,
I would say, you have grown to not feel like
(08:20):
you have to force it like a dick into one's ass.
Speaker 3 (08:23):
That's right. We've all been there and it hurts it.
Speaker 5 (08:26):
Does you know it does smell like you're gay?
Speaker 4 (08:30):
I think that's also you.
Speaker 5 (08:33):
Are you joking?
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Maybe you're telling the truth that you're lucky enuf to
your family's dead, But what would one I'm gonna ask
Celia this because we haven't let her talk, and I'm
going to point to her for a limited time and
hear's some wisdom from someone whose family isn't one hundred
percent together, isn't none of us have a family that's
(08:56):
really all together, but a family that's a little old,
you know, divided, et cetera, could be Uh, we all
are annoyed by certain people in our family. So yeah,
how do you suggest people juggle this family situation for
optimmental health?
Speaker 5 (09:13):
Because that is what is important and go.
Speaker 7 (09:16):
You have to really prioritize yourself and what you want
to spend time on, or time who you want to
spend time with, rather than feeling guilted by people.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
I had this fantasy of like, I want to take
this has been a fantasy I've had for years. I
just want to take like a week and just be
by myself and see what that's like and see what
feelings come up. And I never really had the guts
to do it. But this year I said, I've been
working on my you know, the spiritual stuff, the emotional
stuff for like over a year, and I'm like, let's
(09:49):
see if I write in my calendar December twenty sixth
through January second, take the whole time at home. Let
me see how it feels. What's the worst that could happen,
What feelings could possibly come up that I won't be
able to handle.
Speaker 5 (10:04):
Let's see.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
But that having a fantasy and never fulfilling it. It's
just like I'll be eighty years old someday and wondering
why did I never have.
Speaker 5 (10:12):
The guts to just settle in at home and see
what that's like.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
This doesn't mean I'm like have to tie myself in
the house and lock myself in and not go to.
Speaker 5 (10:19):
Dinner or whatever if it should to rise.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
But like if you ever thought to yourself, I want
to take the time to just be who I am
and see what occurs to me to do from day
to day.
Speaker 5 (10:30):
Do it now.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
And when you said something about guilt, I often say
when you said, oh, don't be guilted by people wanting
you to spend.
Speaker 5 (10:40):
Time with them.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Guilt is for people who've done something wrong. If it's
wrong to take care of yourself mentally, if it's wrong
to not see problematic family members, if it's wrong to
not run ragged and then come back to work even
worse than you were before, nothing wrong with any of that.
So the guilt has to be something you internally work
(11:04):
on and get rid of. Because we have nothing to
feel guilty about. I mean, I like that you got
you to your father you do that Jewish tradition of
Chinese food on Christmas and don't care that you're not
even Jews.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Right, you go for it.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
You don't even do the movie after at least the
Jews are generous enough to do that.
Speaker 5 (11:21):
You're you're a real Jew.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
That's right. I get five five dinner and I go,
you're paying this time? That's it? And then I go,
I go bye, love you. That's it.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Well, how do you feel about Christmas music? Because I
was a little upset with I. Okay, So I think
I've said on the podcast before, I don't listen to
a lot of music. I'm just starting to again because
every song with words seems to have some memory for me,
and I'm like, uh, I don't want to get.
Speaker 5 (11:53):
Emotional all the time. So I usually listen to this channel.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
I'm serious, that is all forties music because it doesn't
have any emotion attached to it because I wasn't born yet,
so how would I know. So what happens is the
day after Thanksgiving, my fricking forties channel, I turn it
on to get a little you know, Uh, you're the top,
you are the Colossie. I'm you know, I'm looking Forard.
Speaker 5 (12:19):
To call porter and instead I hear of yourself a
rapy little Chris what the day after Thanksgiving? I don't
like it.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
I felt it was forced upon me, so I had
nothing to listen to. I what is it we're taping
this December eighteenth. I am finally. Yesterday was the first
day I listened to one Christmas song. It was in
my mind, let it snow bing Crosby. Sure he was
abusive to his children, but that's never been considered a
(12:52):
bad thing, right, And I was like, let me listen
to that, and I finally eased into it. So what
I'm saying is this Christmas music.
Speaker 5 (13:01):
All this is forced, forced, forced.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
If you feel it at all, like it's forced in,
don't do it?
Speaker 5 (13:07):
Are you a Christmas music guy? Have you started that
yet this year?
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I never was.
Speaker 6 (13:13):
There were a handful of certain songs like I'll tell
you Merry Christmas, buy and sync Woo.
Speaker 5 (13:19):
Do you like the modern stuff?
Speaker 6 (13:20):
I get that, yeah, Mammy Chrismuth and heavy Eh, it's
the fucking shit, dude.
Speaker 5 (13:28):
I know it is.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Honestly, if that that, if anyone has any bad feeling
to their death song, like you're an idiot.
Speaker 6 (13:34):
Y's that I like Last Christmas Bye by Wham I Do.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
Yeah, that gets to me a little because it has
see that has eighties memories for me of heartbreak and
when I still believed in love and that there was
hope in the world and there's not.
Speaker 5 (13:47):
So it's like, yeah, so you know, I understand that.
Speaker 6 (13:50):
I do also love that music video because it's just
George Michael pretending to be interested.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
In a woman and like pretending not to be gay.
It's the funniest video, so you can relate to it exactly.
Speaker 6 (14:00):
Yes, she smells like you're gay shrinkshop dot com.
Speaker 5 (14:05):
Ah No, but it is. It's weird. How if it
all feels.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
Like it's not right, you don't have to do it,
you know, like this whole thing of like I have
a friend, poor thing.
Speaker 5 (14:16):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
She told me that every year her entire family, like
seven relatives stay at her house for five days live. Yes, now,
I have never before heard such a good argument for
living in a small house.
Speaker 5 (14:41):
It is.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
And again she loves them, she has no problem with them.
But the zero alone time and the zero chance to
have a down time and to factor in what you
need that just would not work for her the house
is not a hotel, and how poor are people that
they can't just stay in a hotel?
Speaker 5 (14:58):
That's my feeling. Don't be so poor? Stop being poor.
I think that's the lesson of the holidays, don't you.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
I stop being.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Poor, and don't be friends with Nick because I'll tell
you why.
Speaker 5 (15:11):
There's a song. Have you heard this Christmas song? Where
they go? It's an old one. I think it might
be bing Crosby. Also, it's the holiday season?
Speaker 3 (15:23):
A hoop?
Speaker 7 (15:24):
Do you?
Speaker 2 (15:25):
I dick grey duck? And don't forget to hang up
your sock? So every time I hear it, what do
you think?
Speaker 5 (15:30):
I think? And don't forget to suck a.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
Big dock cock.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
It's like all I hear is don't forget to suck
on your cock, get at it and you ruined Christmas?
Speaker 5 (15:42):
But in a good way?
Speaker 7 (15:43):
Is that?
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Dude?
Speaker 3 (15:44):
That's how I feel? The in sing song, I add
lib so many things.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
I love it, Merry Christmas because I'm fucking gay?
Speaker 5 (15:54):
What's wrong with us? Celia?
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Do you have feelings towards this, this this forced merriment
of Christmas and songs?
Speaker 7 (16:04):
I love Christmas music.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
No, no, it's great, But do you think it's ever
forced upon you, like a prison rate.
Speaker 7 (16:12):
I think that all I want for Christmas is you
is forced upon us. Yeah, like insanely.
Speaker 5 (16:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (16:20):
I love like Wonderful Christmas Time I Paul McCartney, I
like it too. Yeah, I love that song. I also
like Last Christmas and I really like the old stuff
like being Crosby. I like Frank Sinatra's jingle Bells.
Speaker 5 (16:37):
Yes, this is my favorite.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
There's two songs that came out Christmas songs that came
out in the eighties that I love but like I
cannot listen to. And one is the one that band
aid one where.
Speaker 7 (16:51):
It's like do you know it's Christmas?
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Because I was working at Rolling Stone at the time
in the eighties and when that came out, and like,
it just is too I'm not saying it's a bad memory,
but it's too nostalgic for me because I lived through
that recording and I was like, whenever I hear it,
I'm like, ah, I should be listening for the African people,
(17:17):
but it almost makes me just too much wish for
that time of my life. So I'm like, well, not
not yet this year. And I think sometimes that's the
whole feeling that we should have maybe not yet it's
not like, oh, I'll never listen to it again. Hearing
Bob Geldorf for Spandau Ballet singing that DoD and Africa's
(17:42):
Christmas do Wow the greatest.
Speaker 4 (17:48):
This is love.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
But I mean that maybe okay next year. What I
did was never okay by the way that singing. But
that might be all right next year, but it's not
okay this year, and that's all right. And there was
another Eighties Christmas song.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
I don't know.
Speaker 5 (18:05):
They're all so like just they were a little oh,
I know the Pogues, that one where he goes.
Speaker 4 (18:12):
Yeah dadday ya La da da.
Speaker 5 (18:14):
The streets of New York City. You know that one.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
It's about this drunk and his girlfriend fighting on Christmas
by that Irish donkey band, the Pogues, who were just
a bunch of Irish drunks, and it it's so like,
oh my god, I remember fighting on the street with
an Irish drunk at the time.
Speaker 5 (18:35):
Do I have to relive this every year?
Speaker 3 (18:38):
You know?
Speaker 2 (18:39):
So what I'm saying, folks in a roundabout, but yet
literal way is just just do what you can handle.
If you put a toe in if you listen to
three notes of it and you're already sobbing, or you're
plunged into depression and nostalgia that you can't handle, just.
Speaker 5 (18:57):
Stop it and listen to the forties junction. You know
what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Listen to a disco inferno, Listen to Shrink This old
episodes and go that doesn't make me cry, It doesn't
even make me laugh or feel anything.
Speaker 5 (19:08):
And that's what we're here for.
Speaker 6 (19:10):
For you, aren't we, Nick, We're here to make you
wet that.
Speaker 5 (19:17):
No sense, So listen, listen.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
We're gonna take two weeks off because even we deserve
some time to ourselves, to feel things, to eat Chinese food,
to not do much, to not drive Celia crazy over
her little break that she contractually has. And we will
be premiering season two of Shrink This back by unpopular demand?
Speaker 5 (19:46):
Who asked for it? No One? On January?
Speaker 4 (19:50):
What is it? Celia?
Speaker 5 (19:51):
January? What you typed It?
Speaker 2 (19:56):
Tuesday, January thirteenth. It's going to be the episode no
one asks for and nobody wants. We're coming back with
the did we Fix Celia episode? We will revisit Celia's
troubles and woes.
Speaker 5 (20:11):
That we examined in season.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
One, and we will end a crippling silence about did
our intervention work?
Speaker 4 (20:21):
Tune it in.
Speaker 5 (20:28):
Third date and comment below. I actually don't comment below
because there's nothing to comment about.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
We don't care.
Speaker 2 (20:36):
I turn off comments. I don't want to hear oh, oh,
what do you think you're funny?
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (20:41):
You look old?
Speaker 7 (20:42):
You know?
Speaker 5 (20:43):
And those are all directed a Nick.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Oh sad so parting words Celia to our delightful audience for.
Speaker 7 (20:51):
Two weeks, Listen to shrink This on your iHeartRadio app
or wherever you get your podcasts. Email us at shrink
This Show gmail dot com and have a good holiday.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Great she like, did gave you a little gift Nick
by making you not say it?
Speaker 3 (21:09):
That's right? So I'm just gonna sing it. You're gonna
wand up a feeling and the second dick and lick
your balls.
Speaker 4 (21:16):
On the ceiling.
Speaker 5 (21:19):
Yeah, see that's what you do.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
I'm just gonna go, uh beat up an irishman in
the street in New York.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
As you should.
Speaker 5 (21:28):
I think that'll be nice. We'll see you on January thirteenth, whether.
Speaker 4 (21:32):
You like it or not.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
See at Queer's Homers
Elvis Duran and the Morning Show ON DEMAND News
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Bobby Bones Show
Listen to 'The Bobby Bones Show' by downloading the daily full replay.