Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
What would you talk about on your on your podcast
morning show? Hello, you're on, I see you. Sorry, everyone,
(00:23):
I'm judging you and you and you stop poking. Welcome
to the fifteen minute Morning show podcast. It may not
be fifteen. It maybe thirteen, and maybe fourteen. It maybe
twenty five. We don't care. But it needed a name. Hey, So,
good morning or good afternoon or good evening. Froggy, good morning.
And there's Gandhi and Scary Straight and Eate. There's Scotty b.
(00:46):
There's Danielle. There's Garrett Brody sitting down in his beautiful den.
Hi Brody in the den. We're missing producer Sam. She
come in. I don't know. She's not usually in the podcast. Okay, hey,
so let me ask you what are we doing today?
We had a theme weird shame, hold on, hold on,
(01:07):
Nate is not folks trying to find my thing. Well,
we were going to talk about the strangest thing you
bought online. We started that yesterday. But why didn't you
bring it in today? What you're supposed to bring it
in for showing to I don't have it yet, but
I'm gonna show you. It's arriving today. Okay. So The
theme is the what the dumbest thing you've ordered online
is that? When it started? Because I will show you.
(01:29):
I was on eBay and I was like, oh, I
remember this game called Fatigo. You guys remember that. You
absolutely love Stigo. It's like chest meats Risk. Anyways, my
brother and I would always play, an it would always
kick my ass. There was one time where I was
about to win and then he takes the board and
throws it across the room. And I haven't played Statigo since.
(01:50):
So I found the exact it scarred you. Oh yeah,
but I mean I finally won, right, But I found
the same box from the eighties that we had, the
same set. It has all the pieces, It's barely been touched.
It's like red and blue pieces, right, remember the marshal
in the general and all this stuff. Anyway, I found
the exact thing, and it's arriving today. I can't wait
(02:13):
because this is supposed to be stupid, crappy order that.
Here's the thing, so I had. I could have bought
it right in the box that they currently have, but
I wanted the same looking box that we had growing up.
So instead of spending I had to spend eighty five dollars. Wow. Yeah,
(02:33):
but the quality is way different. It's much better back
in the eighties. The pieces are made of crap. Now, yeah,
that's got to smell. The box has a few like,
I don't know, mildew stains or something, but the pieces
in the set is all intact. So I can't wait
for that to get here today. Well, I mean, look
at light right. You buy a light right now, and
(02:54):
it's this thin and it's not the same Back in
the day. It was that big box with the pins
that you pay. Yeah. Back then it was the same
size as a sign in Times Square. Kids today right, So, Froggy,
what stupid crap did you buy online? Okay, so it
was a gift for Lisa for Christmas. But it's something
(03:16):
that we're all using and it really is very stupid,
but it works so good. It is a T shirt folders.
It's like the one they use in the stores at
the gap. Ye look at this. So you take the shirt,
you take this shirt and you put it on there
and you fold it and then you take as the
shirts laying there, you take this side and it folds
(03:37):
the stuff over and you take this side. I get
a shirt and demonstrate you can't do it holding it
up in the air. And then you take your shirt
done and you fold it and your shirt is perfect.
It seems like a lot of how do you get
the perfect shirt off of the contraption. It's just it's
laying there the whole time. It's just just like Lisa,
(03:59):
very similar. Wow, you must be watching. If you bought
me gifts like that, I've just laid there. I wouldn't
Yes on the on the Elvis or in Morning Show Today,
Danielle asked a question about who T shirts were designed for,
why they were invented, and she said it was for
(04:21):
guys who were too dumb to iron or so buttons. Yes,
so frog, he just took it one step further, took
the dummies T shirt and found a device because he
can't fold a shirt. Eat my ass. I'm telling you
right now, who shirt Christmas present? No, it's not. You
know what? If you know if you had one, you
(04:41):
would like it, trust me, because every shirt it's folded
so nicely. Now, so buy me one and send it
here and I'll try it and then you'll say you're sorry, Yeah,
I fold my Who cares? You know what? Okay? If
the question was what stupid thing did you buy? And
you just admitted on here or that you Christmas present
you bought your wife? Hey, what do you have? Okay?
(05:07):
So I told you guys a while ago that I
found a really random hair and then there's one in
my nose that's been bothering me a lot. But have
any of you guys ever tried to pluck a nose hair? Oh? Yeah?
Like hell? And then Neer specifically says, don't stick this
up your nose. So I was like, what do I do?
I need to get rid of a nose hair. Enter
(05:27):
the tiny little razors. These are specifically for your facial hair.
I know you're not supposed to stick it in your nose,
but I'm going to do it anyway. I gotta get
this hair. I gotta get it. It's so annoying and
every time I pull on it, I start sneezing and
my I start watering, and it's terrible, And all I
can think about is this nose hair. Gandhi, if you
stick that blade up your nose and you hit that
(05:48):
little artery that bleeds, you're gonna not gonna do it.
It's just gonna be right here. Use those in your ear,
like if you have ear hair. It doesn't say where
to use it. It It just says sharp stainless steel blade
for quick, precise facial grooming. It's called Japanesque not a client,
but yeah, it doesn't tell you where not to put it.
I wouldn't be sticking those up my holes. But you
(06:08):
know I have the electric uh nose hair trimmer. It's great.
Oh really, it rattles my brain. I tried it one
time and I can't do it. I'm glad I'm not
the only one with a random nose hair that needs
to be handled than know my my hair. My nose
looks like Don King's head. Scary's scary for God to
(06:31):
bring his show and tell dumbthing he bought online and today,
so he's going to show us on a photo. Right,
So I wanted to go Google to look for a picture,
and I thought it was a one of a kind
thing or a very limited but now I see that
it's like been mass produced. It is a It is
a super Mario Brothers light box lamp that I bought
for sixty seven dollars. Now you could see there. I
(06:55):
like it. Mine doesn't look as good as that. Mine
is like a light brown wood. I think I got
the bootleg version. I don't know. I was drunk one night.
I paid overpaid for it because this thing is like
twenty nine dollars and apparently you could just buy it
on some website. But I thought, I'm like a rarity
and I found it on eBay and it just sits
on my shelf. I don't even plug it in, but
(07:17):
it's still my batteries. No, it plugs in. It's just
a plug. You said, you don't plug it in. No,
I don't. I don't plug it in. It's just sitting
there as like, and people come into my house like,
why don't you plug it in? That feel like the
Super Mario's thing. I think you're gonna you're gonna get
a lot more enjoyment out of it if you plug
it in. I thought it was an anti cup until
just now. Girlfriend. Good thing you have a girlfriend, because
(07:39):
if you were a single guy and I was a girl. Yeah,
if if I was a girl coming over your house
and I saw a Super Mario lamp in this guy's
house that potentially about to sleep with, would be like,
it's kind of weird. I think it's kind of I
think it's kind of cool. Thank you, guys. I mean,
otherwise I find you very bizarre. But I'd just be
annoyed that you kept saying super Mario. We said Mario
(08:02):
here in the Northeast? Is I heard? It's Mario? Hold on,
I'm in the northeast. I don't say, Mary Brodie, what
were you trying to say? Brodie's levels are really low today,
By the way, what's up, Brodie? I'll raise the game.
Why don't you talking to the microphone? Why Brodie? What
(08:30):
did you want? Bie was dying to say something to
Scary And now I said, he doesn't keep that lamp
in his house. He keeps it in his van. The
kids love it. Oh god, on that one my volume?
Is it better? Yes? Now we can hear your never
can your slices? Now we can hear insulting people. Hey, Garrett,
what's your brain today? All right? So for Christmas, my
(08:52):
my son wanted a robot, and you know, finding like
a robot is weird. So I went on eBay and
I bought this thing. Right, So what it what's it doing? Oh?
My god, flies, that's not a waste of money. Yeah,
(09:14):
went into the fireplace. And then so then I wanted
to buy something from myself too. So I've been getting
into sports cards recently and there's these this this card
that I knew I had growing up, but uh, sorry,
the trone thing is out of control. You know, if
you could teach that thing to fly up Gandhi's nose
and cut her nose. There's a sports card I had
growing up, but I knew I probably threw it out
(09:36):
or wasted or benter or something. So I found it.
It's this card right here. It's Mark Jackson. But here's
the thing. He played for the Knicks at the time,
in the late eighties early nineties. But see these two
guys sitting behind him. Those are the Menendez brothers sitting
courtside at a New York Nick game. And this was
this was before they became known for what they did. Um. So, yeah,
(10:01):
thirteen bucks on eBay and it's on its route to
my house. Wow. So when you when you looked it up,
it actually said, by the way, this is more than
just a card to this player. This is the Menendez brothers, right.
So the value of the cards going up not based
off of Mark Jackson and his talents, based off of
the fact that the Menendez brothers are sitting courtside behind him. Yeah,
they killed their parents. Fabulous. Now I love that. I see.
(10:23):
I find it interesting. I'm gone before Okay, I will
show you. I want to show you something that just
arrived the other day that I love. If these are
cocktail napkins that say looks like it's fucked this ship o'clock. Yeah,
And I have some towels so when you visit, you
want to dry your hands in the bathroom, dry your
(10:45):
fucking hands. So I bought something else, which was just
the biggest waste of money for me, and you guys
know me, the productivity planner. It open. When am I
(11:05):
ever going to When am I ever going to open
up this? Don't remember that year I got crazy and
Danielle and I went to Staples because I wanted to
make that the year of getting organized. Oh my gosh.
He spent so much money on organization and things to
organize himself and he never used any of it. I
was like, stuff like, this is a waste for me
(11:26):
productivity at daniel what did you bring in today? All right?
So my husband loves squirrels and he collects like all
kinds of props and stuff. That he actually uses when
he sells houses because he's a realtor and he makes
all these cute things. So I went online and ordered
him this. I gotta put it on the Oh we
love that, Oh questions questions. I could use this in
(11:54):
some of his clothing pictures for his real estate. Does
he ever ask you to use it while you're in bed?
Yet he does? Yeah? I love it. And it sounds
like you're suffocating, but it's really great. Love that stupid
(12:14):
at all? This is supposed to be stupid stuff you
bought off. Well, this is kind of stupid. Scotty me,
what do you bring in? What stupid thing did you order?
I apologize. I didn't bring it in. It's in my
attic and I couldn't get to it. But it is stupid.
It was an It's an eBay purchase, and I don't
know why. I was looking up old mascots from the
seventies and I bought this creepy burger king stuffed uh
(12:38):
crown guy. Why I don't know, but it's still in
the bag and it's from the late seventies and I
just have it. I don't know why I bought it.
The King went away for a while, but he came
back and he's in brand new commercials that just started
last week. I think Burger King's using old logos. Now
is this a stuffed animal or like a wooden figure? Like?
(13:00):
What is it? It's yeah, that brody? What stupid thing
did you buy online? What's that behind you? By the way,
That is my box of This is a shout out
to Scottie. It's my box of miniwheats. Maple brown sugar
(13:22):
flavor I found out from the serial podcast they just
discontinued its body. Do you enjoy that flavor? It's my
favorite now they discontinued it. So cinnamon bun you'll like
that one, alright, not the same as maple, but whatever. Okay.
So when I moved out of my parents apartment in Brooklyn,
(13:44):
I left a lot of my old kids toys in
the kid cabinet that I had and I left it
there for god knows how many years. At some point
I went home and I said, you know, i'll take
my games. They were gone. I said, where's my smash
up Derby? Mother said, oh, you didn't need that. I
threw it out a couple of years ago. You haven't
noticed it in fifteen years. So I got really upset
(14:06):
because I wanted it. And so I remember these big cars.
You would run them up ramps and they parts would
fly off. So I went on eBay. First of all,
they're not quite as big as I remembered them. You're
holding up, you pull all right, and you pulled the
t stick and it and it runs right. So this
(14:28):
was probably like ten dollars when I was a kid,
and uh, I bought it for like a hundred dollars
on eBay when I figured, like I figured my I
figured my kids would love it. So I take it
out and I showed them the cars and they when
they crash, all the parts fly off, and they said,
that's great, we're getting a PlayStation. Yeah, so I've got
I've got this exactly card I love that Brodie. Yeah,
(15:01):
so it's my childhood. But you know, nobody wants to
play with it, just like, yeah, that's correct, just falls
into pieces. That's your issue. No one wants to play
with it. What about you, Nate? What stupid crap did
you buy off online? I started this conversation. That's right,
I know, but what was it in a cool box?
(15:23):
Because that wasn't stupid at all, you know, that's the
way he said. I guess we got to get out
of here because I just looked at the time and
it's fuck this shadow clock. Bye bye fifteen minute morning show.