Audition To Be a Zombie

Brandon has to audition to be a zombie at a haunted house, over the phone! 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Don't answer the phone. Elvis Durand Elvis durand phone tapping.
What's all about Danielle?

Speaker 2 (00:05):
All right, so Connor is phone tapping his friend Brandon.
Brandon has wanted to work at this wanted house for
years as a zombie. But you have to audition to
be in the house because it's that, it's this, this
is a really cool house.

Speaker 1 (00:17):
So I call and I make him audition.

Speaker 3 (00:21):
Really Oh god, all right, let's listen.

Speaker 1 (00:25):
Good morning, hey Brandon, It's Lisa from Molly.

Speaker 3 (00:28):
Oh. I'm in a meeting, right, there's me one minute
to step out. Okay, all right, I'm geting.

Speaker 1 (00:36):
Are you in a bathroom? All right?

Speaker 2 (00:39):
So here's the deal. When you came the other night,
we loved you. You have the look that we want
for this. Oh yeah, so I just I needed to
feel that you are zombie material. So I need you
to give me your best grandpa zombie.

Speaker 3 (00:56):
Zombie.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
Yeah yeah, Oh that's pretty good. That's pretty good.

Speaker 2 (01:02):
Okay, how about now the guy comes to the door.
You open the door and it's a zombie pizza guy.
What does the zombie pizza guy sound like?

Speaker 3 (01:10):
Here's your pipe, it's got food and brain.

Speaker 2 (01:16):
That no that sounds more like a pirate. We don't
want a pirate zombie. Don't sound like, oh my gosh, no,
you need to take zombie one oh one. Zombies have
different sounds depending on what happened to them before they passed,
Just like.

Speaker 3 (01:31):
Like that type of thing, right, all right, to take
him good?

Speaker 1 (01:40):
What happened?

Speaker 3 (01:41):
Someone just entered the office, that's all. I just want
them for good.

Speaker 1 (01:45):
So people hear you making these sounds.

Speaker 3 (01:47):
If they come in the office, don't hear me.

Speaker 1 (01:49):
But all right, so we can continue. Yeah, okay, okay.
This is the type of one that house where.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
If someone gets scared, we allow them to like take
it out on the zombie.

Speaker 1 (01:59):
Are you cool with that?

Speaker 3 (02:02):
So I might get like hit.

Speaker 2 (02:03):
Well, we don't let them hit above the face because
we don't want to mess up the makeup that we
spend hours doing. But like you know, chess and arms
and so, do you want a jockstrap?

Speaker 3 (02:14):
Do I own a jockstrap? Yeah? Probably from high school.

Speaker 2 (02:18):
Because if this, if somebody kicks you when you scare them,
you want to make sure that the stuff is protected
they kick me, That's what I'm saying. This makes us
better than the other haunted houses where it's you know,
it's a different feel in the haunted house.

Speaker 3 (02:30):
Okay, I guess.

Speaker 2 (02:32):
So there's different packages. So are you Are you okay
with that?

Speaker 3 (02:36):
Is it possible to work in that particular package? No?

Speaker 1 (02:39):
Yeah, Unfortunately you have to do everything.

Speaker 3 (02:43):
Right.

Speaker 1 (02:45):
And it's not that they're hitting your brand and they're
hitting zombie.

Speaker 3 (02:48):
Branded, but they're hitting the actual brand and underneath all
of the zombie branded.

Speaker 1 (02:53):
Okay, what would two zombies having sex sound like? Go,
that's pretty good. That's a good one.

Speaker 2 (03:04):
All right, Well okay, what would a zombie sitting on
the toilet sound like?

Speaker 3 (03:12):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (03:12):
That's good. Way one more time.

Speaker 3 (03:17):
You did?

Speaker 1 (03:22):
Is that?

Speaker 3 (03:22):
Connor? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (03:24):
Connor, you want to tell him what's going on.

Speaker 3 (03:26):
I'm on the phone too, man.

Speaker 1 (03:28):
You can phone to.

Speaker 3 (03:30):
Alf.

Speaker 1 (03:31):
This isn't an audition.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
Daniel and over Melvis Durant in the Morning show and
we're just phone tapping you.

Speaker 3 (03:37):
I'm going to kill you.

Speaker 1 (03:39):
Gonna be Elvis Durant's phone tap