Pay The Church More for the Wedding Singing

Chris is getting married in a few days, so Skeery calls from the church demanding more money as a donation!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Don't answer the phone.

Speaker 2 (00:01):
Elvis Duran, the Elvis Duran phone tap.

Speaker 3 (00:04):
I happen to love Scary in this phone tap. I
think he did a great job pretending to be a
man of the claw. The letter came in, Dear Elvis Durant,
my fiance Chris and I will be married in just
a few days. Everything's going great except for some dealings
we've had with the church. Wouldn't it be great if
a few more problems came up at this last moment

(00:25):
before our wedding? Yes, Donna, we think he'd be a
great phone tap. All right, Donna is phone tapping her
fiancee Chris. Donna's going to start the call, and Scary
comes in as the deacon from the church. Let's listen it.

Speaker 2 (00:40):
Hello, Hey, that's up.

Speaker 4 (00:42):
I'm actually on another call with John O'Hurley over at
Saint Ndrom and we have a really, really, really big problem.
What's the singer is not included and we have to
pay two hundred dollars more and I just don't have
the money.

Speaker 5 (00:55):
The free said it was included.

Speaker 4 (00:57):
They said change now, and the singer is not as
it put them through. Okay, hold on, hello, hello you there,
Donald yes, I'm here.

Speaker 1 (01:06):
I was calling you about that little blip that we had.

Speaker 5 (01:09):
Well it's not a little blip, that's kind of a
big blip.

Speaker 6 (01:11):
Well yeah, that's why I'm calling to let you know
that the singer's not included in that.

Speaker 5 (01:14):
This is out of control. It's ridiculous. Let me turn around.
You guys got your hand out for more money.

Speaker 1 (01:20):
Well, there's hard times now.

Speaker 6 (01:21):
Less people are coming to church on Sundays and those
baskets are empty when they pass them around.

Speaker 5 (01:25):
I wonder why.

Speaker 6 (01:26):
Because you treat people like this, the price of singers
are going up.

Speaker 1 (01:29):
That's not my problem, so that'll be an addition of that.

Speaker 5 (01:32):
My problem though. Okay, are you.

Speaker 1 (01:33):
Sure you're not creating your own problems in your head?

Speaker 5 (01:36):
Excuse?

Speaker 6 (01:36):
Are you sure they're not your own problems that you're creating,
that you're creating them for yourself? Are if an extra
two hundred dollars is incurred here, what's the big deal?

Speaker 5 (01:46):
If it's not a big deal, it's honored the price
that you told me. All right, I'll get a lawyer.
I don't care.

Speaker 1 (01:52):
Do you want one of the altar boys to sing
for you? We could do that.

Speaker 5 (01:55):
Got a hang up?

Speaker 1 (01:57):
I have a mind to bump you for the kaleti christening.

Speaker 5 (02:00):
On his God.

Speaker 4 (02:00):
Chris, No, no, no, no, calm down, Calm down.

Speaker 1 (02:03):
Miss Ford. Why are you even marrying a guy like this?

Speaker 4 (02:05):
I don't know, Chris, Please, I just want to go
to church. Now.

Speaker 5 (02:09):
I'll come down here and talk to you. Now you
want to talk face to face, I'll talk to you.

Speaker 1 (02:13):
He sounds like a real creep.

Speaker 5 (02:14):
I'm a creep. You're a creep.

Speaker 6 (02:16):
He doesn't sound like a guy that's gonna be there
in sickness and in health because he sounds.

Speaker 1 (02:20):
Like a real ass.

Speaker 5 (02:21):
Excuse me.

Speaker 1 (02:22):
You heard me.

Speaker 6 (02:23):
You're an ass ass and the Lord gave me permission
to say that to you right now.

Speaker 4 (02:27):
Dead right.

Speaker 5 (02:27):
The Lord gave you permission.

Speaker 6 (02:30):
Are you gonna cough up the two hundred dollars or
are you gonna be a bad Catholic who's gonna end
up in hell?

Speaker 4 (02:34):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (02:34):
Why?

Speaker 5 (02:34):
Because I'm not gonna give you two hundred dollars. I'm
a bad Catholic now, yeah, that's real Christian too.

Speaker 1 (02:39):
You're gonna end up in hell? You hear me?

Speaker 5 (02:41):
Okay, good, I'm gonna end up in hell and fiery.

Speaker 4 (02:44):
Underpaid Chris for getting married in five days. You can't
do this. Call him back, Hello, why'd you hang up?
He's on me on the line.

Speaker 5 (02:56):
I don't want to talk to him down because if
I talk to him, I'm really gonna leave work and
I'm gonna go down here and beat them that of
this guy. I'm shaking so much. I don't understand telling
me I'm gonna ask because I don't want to call
up a twenty dollars to the church me. I'm not
gonna be there that. I'm gonna be right in hell him.
I haven't been this pissed off in years. He pushed
the wrong button.

Speaker 4 (03:15):
Okay, hold on a second.

Speaker 1 (03:17):
Yes, yeah, did you speak to your sance?

Speaker 5 (03:22):
I told you not to put me on the phone
with this.

Speaker 4 (03:25):
I get it means to I push the wrong button?

Speaker 2 (03:27):
Are you a big man? Because I got the Lord
on my side.

Speaker 5 (03:30):
I don't give it. You got in your side?

Speaker 2 (03:34):
I now, Yeah, I'm rolling up my sleeves.

Speaker 6 (03:38):
I got Jesus Christ, I got Moses, I got Noah
and his ark.

Speaker 2 (03:41):
We're gonna come and get you.

Speaker 5 (03:43):
Come get me. I'm a David Ford. Come get me.
Drive right down here, come get me.

Speaker 6 (03:48):
You'll be banished to the gates of the hell before
you can say, I do, come get me.

Speaker 5 (03:54):
I'm here, I'm waiting for you. Come get me, and
I'm burning hell just.

Speaker 2 (03:57):
Because I'm in the clergy. You think I'm a wimp.
You hear me, I hear you.

Speaker 4 (04:02):
I'm not.

Speaker 2 (04:03):
You're a bad man, all right.

Speaker 5 (04:05):
I'm a bad man. I'm a bad man.

Speaker 2 (04:07):
And bad people go to bad places.

Speaker 5 (04:09):
Yeh, come get it.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
Lucifer will see you.

Speaker 4 (04:12):
I'm marrying up like no, no, no, he come before.

Speaker 2 (04:16):
You hang up.

Speaker 6 (04:17):
I think I should tell you that this is Gary
Jones Melvios Durant in the Morning Show.

Speaker 2 (04:23):
No you did not, we did. You've been phone tapped.

Speaker 4 (04:26):
I got your baby

Speaker 1 (04:32):
Tap the Elvis Durant's phone tap